"- "t T
M ! if
The Commoner.
10
VOLUME 4,' NUMBER ij.
XBft
L-
The
EMPIRE
Cream
Separator
though not tho oldest. !s tho
most popular separator In too
I world to-day.
Whv? Siinolr because It Is do
ing better work and clvlng crcaf
r satisfaction than any other
can. That's why bo many farm
ers have discarded all others.
will fay you to ctt the best.
Send for our freo books on tho
"Empiro Way" of dairying.
Thbte's good sonuo In thorn.
Empire Cream Separator Co.
Bloomfleld, N. 3.
Oalffe,JlL MJnaeapeU, MUa.
A m ft
yje j:- votv wt. n mis r i
Wmmoaorilot
Follow -tho Flag
JISL
The Only Une With Its Own Station
at Main Entrance World's Fair
Grounds
Manv milos shortest and timo quicker.
Special rnto on Bale daily during the Ex
position Stop-overs at St Louis allowed
on all tickets. All agents can sell you
via. the Wabash.
HARRY E. MOORES, G. A. P. D
OMAHA, NEB.
Ganger Cured
WITH SOOTHING, BALMY OILS.
Canoor, Tumor. Catarrh, Pllos, Fistula. Ulcers.
BR, BYE, 8K38S Kansas City, Mo.
RADIUM
Spcrlal Illustrated edition on the discovcrv
Weaiara fUner & Financier, Denver, Colo.
Sell Silverware
!!r.R,ruiehKriticS,r 8ont s? -iffiSSB
Raymond Mfg. Co., 414 Jackson St., Muncle.lnd
WECONTROL MOISTURE
rv il,,r;iVii "5?.?BIOr "B,J Un't WOI
;r,i:-" m, i". 5.' """"""'focatlnff
linin-t '."""."'"B nu hent-
make ecrfta hatch. Freo rjitMnm?. i?iV
answers qnestlonfl. Sure Hatch Inou.
IadlHRMBQll, Indiana, "
Yes, But Whon?
0, what will take place in this coun
try so grand
When Knox sets torunning amuck?
And what will hecome ol our beauti
ful land
When Knox sets to running amuck?
We'll gather sweet figs from the sharp
thistle weed;
When turnips are sliced they "will
shudder and bleed,
And turtles will travel at 2:30 speed,
When Knox sets to running amuclc
0, what will take place in the centers
of trade
When Knox sets to running amuck?
And where shall thehead. o the mag
nate bo laid
Whon Knox sets to running amuck?
We'll get kerosene at a price that is
fair;
All stocks will be purged of water'nd
hot air.
And magnates for woes of tho public
will care,
Whon Knox sets to running amuclc.
0, what will take place in Dame Na
ture's domain
When Knox sets to running amuck?
And what shall we. see e'er vale, hill
and plain
When Knox sets to running amuck?
Hot water will freeze as it boils on
the stove;
The bark will grow inside of trees in
the grove,
And mountains will over the wide
prairies rove,
When Knox sets to running amuck.
Sqvtelchod.
"Mr. Bildad," remarked Mrs. Bildad,
as soon as the supper dishe3 wero
safely put away, "I want to talk with
you a few moments."
"Uh-huh!" grunted Mr. Bildad from
behind the evening paper.
"I have figured out, Mr. Bildad, that
during the month of March your cigar
bill amounted to an average of 40
cents a day, or $12.40 lor the entire
month."
"Well, haven't T rnr. n v?riif ,
began Mr. Bildad, but the wife of his
bosom interrupted.
"And an average of ?1 a week for
billiards, or ?4 for tho month."
"Great Scott, Mrs. Bildad, don't you
think I am entitled to a little recrea
tion from bus" began Mr. Bildad
only to be choked off again.
"And I have investigated a little
and found that your noonday cinch
game costs you an average of $1 rn
a week, or ?6 for the month." '
"Seo here, Mrs. Bildad, I've got to
have a little recreation from busi
ness cares or I'll-" shouted Mr BP
dad, but he didn't finish.
"And after investigation I ha
found, that it will require nit
,VS pay for the otffi
Vt,. v-vl,"B oli iHuuige m.'
Patent Secured PSswjss
Kwin.mUni.Uo., now. V, Wublmtm, IM).
H PLTHY TREES iKKJM
rramlHms CWn. Catalogue mailed m fw t i .u- '
.w.aa,THNUR$KRK, , 4 raWuilY.llk.
W STARK 08
TREES pr Tatt-78 Yeatf
WXmt moue h &.
1 Dnan . . v H n
BKua, L9HUltaa,Me.;H(HiriYl;
111 CASH
SSiSlSL
of
"Kf ? &
for this sort of thing What 5 it
"Only this, Mr. Bildad. Herels he
bill for my now spring hat, ?18, and
fn?a?i T, ?..pay for without mak
mg any kick."
And although Mr. Bildad restrained
his tongue, tho way his pen sputtered
as he wrote the check conveyed a
world of meaning to Mrs. Bildad
Partisan Prejudice.
Everything herein related te trim
Jf lttr th,e exception of the names and
they are suppressed for several
s6nsTthe chief one being f that L?l
joke Is rather personal. he
Mr. Armstrong, resident 'Qf a Ne
braska town, is a very radical repui
lican and inclined to the belief that
populists and democrats are little less
than anarchists and traitors. He has
two sons-in-law, one of whom is a
prominent populist, and the other a
democrat who is engaged in the news
paper business.
A neighbor of Mr. Armstrong's mat
the populist son in-law on a train not
long ago, and arriving at home
thought the father-in-iaw would be
interested in hearing from a member
of the family. Meeting Mr. Arm
strong on the street the neighbor said:
"By the way, Armstrong, I met that
politically foolish son-in-law of yours
on the train yesterday. '
Armstrong smiled; then grasping
the arm of his neighbor inquired:
"Which one?"
Parenthetically it may be remarked
that the relator of this incident en
joys relating it much more .than he
enjoys hearing it.
Plain English.
"I note with regret' said Judge
Bostonbeans, surveying his corn-t
fields with some admiration and con
siderable gloom, "that the maize is-
uaaiy cnoKea with numerous speci
mens of the genus Xanthium."
"Uh-huh," replied Jed Plowem, the
hired man.
"I suggest, therefore, that you se
cure a hoe and proceed to eradicate
the said superflous and harmful plants
and give tho maize an opportunity to
arrive at maturity."
"As the judge hiked out to catch the
train at tho suburban station Jed
scratched his head.
"Well, if th' jedge meant fer me t'
clean out them cbckleburrs, why'n
thunder didn't he say $0."
1
Precaution,
The watchdog bayed ferociously, but
did not rattle the chain.
u .?w' 1 T were only satisfied that
tbe blamed 'dog would not run amuck "
whispered the prospecting burglar.'
Then the burglar tossed over a large
quantity of fine dog meat and watched
the canine greedily eat it. When the
dog had finished the burglar climbed
oyer the fence and the dog crawled Lo
him and licked his hand with evident
affection.
burgSS'8 th idea" whispered tbe
So saying, after an affectionate pat
of the canine's head, the burglar pro
ceeded to UUt hia Hmm ot,.7 i.,f.
keys into operation. ' u nyiulon
Dont Nerlfifit
, A , Rheumatism
New Appliance for Drawing Acid
Poison Frona th Syatem
Through the Peres of the
Feet Sent to Anybody
FftEE On Approval TRY IT!
Don't neglect rheumatism. The acid
i-oisons accumulate day by day until
joints become solidified in horribly dis
torted shapes and relief from the in
describable suffering is beyond tho
power of man to give.
Heed the warnine: nams of rhen.
niatism and rid your system of the
cause while you can by wearing Magic
Foot Drafts. Don't take harmful
medicine. The Drafts draw out the
acid poisons through the great pores
of Ihe feet, where the capillary and
nerve systems are most susceptible,
Teaching and curing rheumatism in
every part of the body.
YM4CMMW
$ m
7ft
urn
i j, -tx.uiuffiSftjAisa
TSMHHawii
wt .' vAaaViPvaaa yM
Brain Leaks.
Gossip is not a matter of sex
Time here means eternity there
Seeds of doubt never fail to sprout
Sin is always willing to compfSe
Wd'Sur."1 a Sl0t machlDe -La
froHmPw&. iS bGSt When ifc comu
Wirlfi nnon f. .. v
wide open consctoccr t,,e &ulte oE
. The wise preacher Jm" Tney-
H You hive rheumatism send your narao today
to the Marie Foot Drall Co., XC1G Oliver Bldp.,
Jackson. Mich. You will get by return mall a
pair of the celebrated Magic Foot Drafts, which
nave made record of curing nine out of ten
cases in Jackson, wherathe discoverer lives.and
huve already becomo a household, remedy nil
over tho world. No other remedy ever cured so
many cases considered incurable. That Is why
the makers Can Send ttinm nn nnnrnvnl Vnn
I risk nothing. If you arc satisfied with tho ben-
wit received, send one dollar. If not, send noth
ing. A line booklet in colors and many tosti
monlals Comes Iree with the Drafts. Write today-
acuteness by always laughing at an
other's stories.
Of course boys will be boys, but
that is no reason why they should not
also be gentlemen.
Some men can give a dozen excuses
for doing wrong and overlook the one
reason for doing right.
In these days Ihe office that seeks
the man is usually the office without
either honor or emolument.
A near neighbor Is six feet tall and
weigns less than 150 pounds. He is
always as happy as a fat man looks.
Would a hlghwaymar? be excusable
for beating his victim if he kindly
bought salve for the victim's wounds?
There seems to be a growing belief
that a man has a right to rob his fel
lows if he will only pay the victims a
commission. -
The man who will turn a dishonest
trick to get puliic office will turn a
dishonest trick at the-expense of his
constituents.
Somehow or other we never have
much confidence in the progress of a
cuurcn mat is forever trying to eat
itself out of debt.
There is more happiness in a hum
ble home paid for than there is in a
fine mansion whose roof sags with the
weight of a mortgage;
Some men who "take 'great care to
tie their neckties -'straight" pay veiy
little attention tb the straightness of
their business methods.
.Most churches jose "valuable time
trying to take' care pC 'the member
wo insist upbitbeihr rocked in
cradle and lulled to sleep by flattery.
Uiiil