The commoner. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1901-1923, November 21, 1902, Page 10, Image 10

Below is the OCR text representation for this newspapers page. It is also available as plain text as well as XML.

    ill
Commoner;
.
IO
Vol. a, No. 44.
"V
Wbetbtr Common or Hot;
ZM4Qi
Buck the Line'.
'Are you up against hard luck?
Buck the line!
Show the world you're full of pluck;
Buck tho line!
Smash ahead with all your might,
Toe obstaclos left and right,
Brace up, friond, and make a fight
Buck tho lino!
Is your path bosot by foes?k
Buck tho lino!
Does hard fate your way opposo?
Buck tho line!
Hump your shoulders, bow your nock,
Don't lay 'down at ev'ry check,
Smlla and always be on deck
: Buck tho lino! '
'"
Long tho way unto the goal?
Buck tho lino!
Strive with all your heart and soul;
j ' Buck tho line!
Grit, your teoth and try some more,
Through you're hammered till you're
sore,
And 'some timb you're bound to score
' -Buck tho line! -
half-back. That.him cutting across
tho campus'
Fables In Rhyme
Jim Scroggins never thought nor
read, but went where party bosses led;
and whooped it up both day and night
for tariff tax with all his might On
high protection he went daft and
helped ttoo trusts hold Jx thoir graft
And just because they jollied him they
got their canthooks into Jim.
They robbed him on hia flour and
meat, and other things, ho had to eatjr
they robbed him on his clothes and'
6ho?; yea, on his purse they put the
scr'W. But still Jim Scroggins would
r.Oy. fo tho trusts controlled the g. o.
p., riid still remained an easy mark
fc 'v'ry. corporation shark.
'J .3- got enough to eat and wear,"
Raid Jim, and so he didn't care, but
hrld the trusts perfect thoir cinch
unti". at last ho felt their pinch. Then
Jim. discovered with dismay he couldn't
live upon his pay; but ev'ry month
1'd surely find himself a little more
b'nind.
"fwas then he said, "It seeihs to me
I'm short, on this prosperity." But
when he sought a better wago
his trust employers whooped with rage,
Jim got it please observe the facts
just where tho chicken got the ax;
and Jim npw loudly doth, bewail tho
hot air in his dinner pail.
: MORAL.
Tho stomach, 'let ll here he said,
Is not to think with. Try ,your head,
One day Benevolent Intent p.ut on a
sword and gaily went abroad beneath
the tropic skies the heathen for to
civilize, and fit them all for kingdom
come. with cannon balls and fiery rum,
and . Incidentally . to . , seize whatever
promised It to please.
"Why come you here; we're well
content, O, great Benevolent Intent?"
the Uttlo heathen people cried. Benev
olent Intent replied: " 'Tis destiny
that brings me here, which fact I'll
presently make clear. 'Tis on the
make that I am bent," chortled Benov
olent Intent
"We only ask for justice," said the
heathen man with humble head. "The
tyrant for three hundred years we've
fought through agony and tears; our
sole ambition to be free pray, go
you hence and let us bo. Wo know
we're little, weak and brown, so do
not hit us when we're down."
"Nay,- It la .vain that you have
tried," Benevolent Intent replied, "My
' Christian duty, is made clear-7-Fye got
to grab all. I see here; and if you make
a kick, b,e sure .I'll dope you with the
water cure Tis Christiafl zeal that
my heart thrills, and you have got to
foot tho bills." .
MORAL.
Tho moral's hero but what's tho uso?
Just frame up any old excuse.
Bill Wilkins said, "Corruption's rife
in politics and public life, and I'll hot
soil my hands a bit by taking any part
in it A nomination always comes
from caucuses controlled by bums, and
decent men thoy will throw down to
tako tho worst toughs in tho town."
So saying, Wilkias went his way
and ,would not vote election day; hut
held aloof from politics and in Stfl
turmoil would not mix. And while
Bill Wilkins stood apart the tough
ward heelers took now heart, and each
one quickly shed his coat and hustled
to get out his vote.
Tho corporations won tho fight and
boosted rates clear out of sight, but
shirked thoir taxes onto Bill, and oth
ers like ho is, until thoy groaaed In
agony and swore at the high taxes
that they Tjore. It ne'6r dawned on
Bill's intellect 'twas merely what he
should expect
And thus Bill Wilkins cheats himself
and corporations get their pelf; a thing
that will go on until a gleam of sense
comes unto Bill. Till Wilkins makes
a .change of plan and does his duty like'
a man, he'll get it and 'tis what he
needs right where sweet Cora wore
her beads.
MORAL.
If you'd have politics be clean,
Get out and help bust the machine.
A little bug at early dawn awoke
from sleep and gazed upon the big
round world and said with glee, "Of
course all this was made for me." And
thinking thus it shook with mirth and
started out to boss the earth; nor made
a note that through the blue sky up
above a birdie flew.
The bird looked down with vision
keen and this conceited bug was seen.
A swoop, a dive, a quick ker-chug, and
all was over for that bug. But ere it
disappeared from sight the silly bug
cried with its might, "I .thought I
owned the world immense; I should
have had much bettor sense."
Some parties,,, just 'twixt you and
me, are like this bug as you shall see.
They get puffed up and then com
mence to poso as special providence;
and say, "Good friends, you owe to me
your wotlderful prosperity; and owing
this you should delight whene'er I
rob you left and right"
They think because the people grow
to righteous anger very slow that they
can pile upon' their backs 'bout any old
amount of tax; that nearly ev'ry man
believes he's 'better off when ruled by
thieves. Some day men in Wall street,
.New York, will get it where jugs get
the cork.
MORAL.
Keen It in mind day after day
I You're foolish when you get too gay.
Forethought.
Bllkins "If my wife comes in here
to price cigars for my Christmas pres
ent you offer her a box of my favorites
for 99 cents."
Dealer "All right."
Bilklns "Put 'em in a pretty, box,
too. Here's $4 and a postal card to
make up the difference." :
T Pit the Crime.
The publisher of tho newspaper that
gave music supplements with the Sun
day edition was haled before the judge.
"These proceedings may be illegal,"
remarked his honor, "but nevertheless
you are to be punished for giving away
those alleged songs and tunes with
your Sunday edition."
"You daro not send mo to prison;
you daro not. hang me, and you daro
not offer me physical violence," said
tho publisher in a haughty tone of
voice.
"Very true," replied his honor. "But
we had no idea of resorting to either
of those things."
"What are you going to do about It?"
asked the publisher.
"Wo are going to make tho punish
ment fit tho crime, sir. See that piano
and those ladies and gentlemen? Well,
that piano will be used in playing the
accompaniments and those people will
sing tho songs. You are now about to
be compelled to listen while all that
music supplement stuff is being played
and sung for you."
In vain the publisher begged and
plead for mercy. He had to sit and
listen to it
In tho padded cell, Ward No. 1, of
tho hospital for the incurable insane,
sits a man who shrieks from morning
till night He imagines that every
sound is produced by some one endeav
oring to play music supplements.
And the Sunday' newspaper has-a;
new publisher.
John Mitchell.
Of-a?1 the men, who have had to do
with the coal situation John Mitchell
unquestionably comes out with the
greatest credit He has manifested
qualities that constitute men great
Ho occupied a delicate and difficult
position. He had to deal with public
opinion, on the one hand and with
ignorant, illiterate and unreasoning
followers on the other. If he failed of
securing and retaining the confidence
Of either element his cause was lost
That he did retain the confidence of
public and miners alike Is the best
tribute to his astuteness and sagacity.
If Mr. Mitchell had not cast his lot
with the laboring element he would
have, mado a success as a diplomat
He has that combination of subtlety
and frankness which comes very near
to constituting its possessor a genius.
Chicago Chronicle.
Full of Embarrassment.
The announcement from Washing
ton that the republican leaders will
not consent to a tariff revision is met
by the Indianapolis News, a paper
that generally support republican can
didates; with this interesting state
ment: "Of course wo understand that
the question Of tariff revision is full of,
embarrassment for the republican par
ty. The present tariff is only five
years old, and yet there is all over the
country a revolt against it among the
republicans themselves. Republican
candidates in Massachusetts are de
manding the removal of the duties on
coal, wool, hides and steel. v In Wis
consin there is a strong opposition to
the present law among the republi
cans., The schism in the Iowa republican
party on this question is clearly de
fined. In Indiana the, tariff reform
sentiment is now, as it always has
been, strong. Whena tariff law be
comes obsolete in five years there is
abundantf reason for .alarm .op. the part,
of those responsible for it". "
Glory.
Tho ' long procession of university
dignitaries wound slowly across the
campus. Suddenly tho air was pierced
by a resounding yell.
"Ber-rax, Ber-rax, Wow chow, billy
wow, whack lack snack; icky bick,
ricky u.3k, hack, hack, dack; ber-rax,
'rah, 'rah, rah!"
"It pleases me beyond mention to
see you young gentlemen grow so en
thusiastic at the sight of learning,"
remarked tho bystander who wore
gold-rimmed glasses.
''Learning, nothing!" ejaculated the
young man in the red sweater. "We're
1 not whooping it up for profs. We're
1 whooping for Bill Kickemoff, the great J
Brain Leaks.
Never look a gift automobile in the
running gear.
The easiest way often proves to bo
the wrong way.
Jealousy starves to death where true
love flourishes.
Trouble is a crop that thrives least
with sunshine.
Those who walk by faith never stum
ble in the dark..
The man without ambition is usual-,
ly without anything else.
Satan prospers because he attends
strictly to his own business.
We enjoy our bounties more when
we ask others to share with us.
The average boy responds to kind
treatment as readily as the average
dog.
The wise man works on his ark ev
ery day; the foolish man waits for the
deluge.
A lot of people are so intent upon the
hereafter that they utterly forget the
present
The world owes every man a living,
but will not pay it unless pushed to
extremes.
When all men take an interest in
politics then politics will be profitable
to all men.
If we succeeded in accomplishing all
that we planned we would not know
when to bo happy.
Considering the number of wise
things Solomon said he performed a
great many foolish ones.
Real municipal reform will begin at
the primaries; theoretical municipal
reform always begins with thoughtful
essays that few people hear and fewer
read.
There is a great deal of solid comfort
In tho thought that wo are judged by
our efforts and not by our achieve
ments. If.it were otherwise nc-ne of
us. would bo safe ... -
r .. TrWilI M. Maupin.,
NEW COFFEB
For the U. S. Army
..Some soldiers are badly affected by.
coffee drinking. . The Hospital Steward
in one of the Army Posts in the West,.,
says: "Though in the medical service
of the Army I suffered agony for two,,
years' from a case of chronic gastric
indigestion, and now that I am free'
from all the tortures attendant upon,
it, I attribute it to the good effects of
Postum Food Coffee, both as a food,
and as a beverage,
I used medicinal, and mechanical
means to relieve myself during those'
two years and oven though I had left
off the use of coffee, I did not find my
self in any measure free until I ha4
commenced using Postum.
Being in charge of a detachment of
tho Hospital Corps, U. S. A., I, of
course, had supervision of the mess,
and by degrees I have initiated into .
using Poslum, every member of tho
mess, some of whom were formerly
very loud in their denunciation of any
thing 'manufactured.' And, going still
further, I have supplied It to our pa
tients In lieu of coffee; none havo
found fault, while .many have praised
it highly, and when returned to duty,
have continued the uso of it when it
waa possible, for a soldier has an ex
tremely hard time In trying to choose
his own food.
For the past" eight months, not a
grain of coffee has been used in this'
Hospital, and thanks to a cook who
prepares Postum just right there is a
brilliant prospect of coffee taking a
permanent seat in the back-ground.
One who has passed through the hor
rors .of indigestion as I have, shuddera
as ho looks back upon his sufferings
and when cognizant of the cause, win.
shun coffee as ho would a rattle
snake." Name given by. Postum Co.,
Battle Creek,. , Mich. . . - ,
-$.
'-.:
-&&