Nebraska Newspapers

    DRINK HOT WATER
BEFORE BREAKFAST
Says you really feel clean, sweet
and fresh inside, and
are seldom ill.
If you are accustomed to wake up
with a coated tongue, foul breath oi
a dull, dizzy headache; or, if your
meals sour and turn into gas and
acids, you have a real surprise await
ing you.
Tomorrow morning, immediately up
on arising, drink a glass of hot water
" :th a teaspoonful of limestone phos
phate in it. This is intended to first
neutralize and then wash out of yoiu
stomach, liver, kidneys and thirty feet
of intestines all the indigestible waste,
poisons, sour bile and toxins, thus
cleansing, sweetening and purifying
the entire alimentary canal.
Those subject to sick headaches,
backache, bilious attacks, constipation
or any form of stomach trouble, are
urged to get a quarter pound of lime
stone phosphate from your druggist or
at the store and begin enjoying this
morning inside-bath. It is said that
men and women who try this become
enthusiastic and keep it up daily. It
is a splendid health measure for it is
more important to keep clean and pure
on the inside than on the outside, be
cause the skin pores do not absorb im
purities into the blood, causing dis
ease, while the bowel pores do.
The principle of bathing inside is
not new, as millions of people practice
it. Just as hot water and soap cleanse,
purify and freshen the skin, so hot
water and a teaspoonful cf limestone
phosphate act on the stomach, liver,
kidneys and bowels. Limestone phos
phate is an inexpensive white powder
and almost tasteless.—Adv.
Your neighbors haven't any more
use for you than you have for them.
GIRLSIGIRISITRY IT,
BEAUTIFY YOUR HAIR
Make It Thick, Glossy, Wavy, Luxur
iant and Remove Dandruff—Real
Surprise for You.
Your hair becomes light, wavy, fluf
fy, abundant and appears as soft, lus
trous and beautiful as a young girl’s
after a “Danderine hair cleanse.” Just
try this—moisten a cloth with a little
Danderine and carefully draw it
through you? hair, taking one small
strand at a time. This will cleanse
the hair of dust, dirt and excessive oil
and in just a few momenta you have
doubled the beauty of your hair.
Besides beautifying the hair at once,
Danderine dissolves every particle of
dandruff; deanses, purifies and invig
orates the scalp, forever stopping itch
ing and faJling hair.
But what will please yon most will
be after % few weeks’ use when you
will actually see new batr—fine and
downy first—yes—but really new
hair—growing all over the scalp. If
you care for pretty, soft bair and lots
of it, surely get a 25 coat bottle of
Knowlton’s Danderine from any store
and just try it. Adv.
The Cnited States produces SO per
cent of the oil of the world.
LOOK! RESINOL HAS
CLEARED THAT AWFUL
SKIN-ERUPTION AWAY
Every day, thousands of skin-suf
ferers find that the moment that Resi
nol Ointment touches their tortured
skin the itching stops and healing be
gins. That is why doctors have pre
scribed it so successfully for over 20
years in even the severest cases of
eczema, ringworm, rashes, and many
other tormenting, disfiguring skin dis
eases. Aided by warm baths with
Resinol Soap, Resinol Ointment usu
ally makes a sick skin or scalp heal
thy, quickly, easily and at little cost.
Resinol Ointment and Resinol Soap
also greatly help to clear away pim
ples and dandruff. So'q by all drug
gists.—Adv.
A new electrical process makes
charcoal from sawmill waste.
IF BACK HURTS CLEAN
KIDNEYS WITH SALTS
Drink Lots of Water and Stop Eating
Meat for a While If the Bladder
Bothers You.
Meat forms uric acid which excites
and overworks the kidneys in their
efforts to filter it from the system.
Regular eaters of meat must flush the
kidneys occasionally. You must re
lieve them like you relieve your bow
els; removing all the acids, waste and
poison, else you feel a dull misery in
the kidney region, sharp pains in the
back or sick headache, dizziness, your
stomach sours, tongue is coated and
when the weather is bad you have
rheumatic twinges. The urine is
cloudy, full of sediment; the channels
often get irritated, obliging you to get
up two or three times during the
night
To neutralize these irritating acids
and flush off the body’s urinous waste
get about four ounces of Jad Salts
from any pharmacy; take a table
spoonful in a glass of water before
breakfast for a few days and your kid
neys will then act fine and bladder
disorders disappear. This famous salts
Is made from the acid of grapes and
lemon juice, combined with lithla, and
l}as been used for generations to clean
and stimulate sluggish kidneys and
stop bladder irritation. Jad Salts is
inexpensive; harmless and makes a
delightful effervescent lithia-water
drink which millions of men and
* women take now and then, thus avoid
ing serious kidney and bladder dis
eases.—Adv.______
Brazil produced sugar commercially
es early as the sixteenth century.
NEWS OFTHE WEEK
CONDENSATIONS OF GREATER OR
LESSER IMPORTANCE.
1 BOILING DOWN OF EVENTS
National, Political, Personal and Other
Matters in Brief Form for All
Classes of Readers.
WAR NEWS.
Four people dropped dead from
heart failure in one of the towns in
England visited by the Zeppelin as the
raiding airship appeared.
* * *
The Swedish foreign office informs
the Associated Press that a warning
against embarking on armed mer
chantmen has been issued to Swedish
citizens.
• • •
The German commerce raider Moewe
eluded British patrols on her return
to a German port by cruising north
ward around Iceland. First Lord o£
the Admiralty Balfour told the Brit
ish house of commons.
* * •
Four German steamers which had
taken refuge in the port cf Lourenco
Marquez, Portugese, East Africa, have
been seized and the Portuguese flag
hoisted on them. The crews of the
vessels were interned.
* • •
Emperor William of Germany has
received the commander of the Ger
man commerce raider Moewe and per
sonally presented him with the Order
Pour Le Merite, accciding to a dis
patch from Amsterdam.
* * *
Germany, in her Verdun drive, has
taken approximately forty square
miles cf positions held by the French,
or more than four times as much as
the French gained in the entire Cham
pagne offensive last fall.
* * •
Germany has declared war cm Por
tugal. Thus thirteen countries are en
gaged in the international struggle.
The declaration of war was made by
Germany chiefly on account of the re
cent seizure of German merchantmen
interned in Portuguese ports.
• * *
The L'nited States has asked Great
Britain for a copy of the confidential
Instructions to commanders of British
merchant vessels, which Germany
claims prove that merchantmen armed
ostensibly for defensive purposes have
orders to act offensively against Ger
man and Austrian submarines.
r * *
The French ministry of marine an
nounces that there were nearly 4.000
men cn board the French auxiliary
cruiser Provence when she was sunk
Supposedly by a submarine in the
Mediterranean on February 26 and
that more than 2.000 lives were lost.
The sinking of the French auxiliary
cruiser Provence is said to be the
greatest ocean disaster of modern
tlmee.
GENERAL.
A prairie fire devastated thousands
of acres in four counties in Kansas
north of Dodge City, and caused the
death of a boy and the severe burn
in of a woman.
* • •
Colonel Theodore Roosevelt, v.-ho is
now at Trinidad, British West Indies,
in a statement given out through the
New York Mail, emphatically declines
to be a candidate in the primaries of
Massachusetts on any other state.
* * *
It was announced at Chicago that
the vote of 400.0(H) engineers, firemen
and trainmen of American railroads
overwhelmingly favored authorizing
union heads to enter into negotiations
with the railroads for an eight-hour
day.
* * *
The soft coal agreement, which will
add from $15,000,000 to $20,000,000 to
the incomes of the mine-workers of
western Pennsylvania, Ohio, Indiana
and Illinois, was signed in New York
subject to referendum vote of all the
bituminous miners in the United
States.
* * *
Francisco Villa, outlawed Mexican
bandit, attacked Columbus, New Mex
ico, with 1,500 men, killed seventeen
Americans and fired many buildings.
He and his followers were driven back
across the International border by
American troops. Villa's total losses
In the fight were estimated in excess
of 100 killed and twice as many
wounded.
• * •
Local option won over prohibition
in Vermont at an election held recent,
ly, by a margin of 13,164 votes. Every
county in the state, with the excep
tion of Orleans, gave a majority in
favor of local option.
• • •
Seven thousand and twenty-eight
Texas boys, in agricultural clubs, last
year showed that they are better far
mers than their fathers. The corn
boys average yield per acre was 35.6
bushels, while the fathers’ was only
24.7. The boys also led In many other
products.
• • •
The Kansas democratic state cen
tral committee at Topeka decided to
hold the state convention, at which
four delegatee-at-large to the national
convention will be chosen, in Hutch
inson, April 11.
• • •
Observance of a "swat the fly” day
in Iowa schools some time soon has
been proposed by W. B. Barney of the
Iowa Dairy and Food commission at
Dos Moines. Every fly which escapes
death Id the spring has 5,000,000,000,
000 descendants by fall, according to
the commissioner.
* * *
A permanent organizatiofl of Ameri
can mayors to promote the cause of
national defense was effected at a
meeting of mayors and their repre
sentatives from eighty large cities at
St. Louis.
Will H. Orpet, University of Wiscon
sin student, was indicted by a Lake
county grand jury in Chicago on a
charge of murdering his former sweet
heart, Marian Lambert.
* * *
Three soldiers were killed and two
seriously injured in a fire that de
stroyed the main barracks and ammu
nition houses at Fort Gibbon, occupied
by Company B, Fourteenth infantry,
at Fairbank, Alaska.
* * *
More than 50 per cent of the Uni
versity of Wisconsin co-eds are affect
ed with goiter in a moderate form, ac
cording to Prof. W. J. Meek, of the
university facutiy, in a lecture to a
health and disease class at Madison.
* * *
The Greek government has called
to the colors ail men of the classes
of 1896 to 1905 of the navy and also all
those formerly called who did not re
spond, according to word received from
Athens by George Cosmos, acting
Greek consul in Omaha.
* * *
The Iowa law giving cities the
power to regulate jitney busses was
held constitutional by Judge George
Jepscn in district court at Sioux
City, but the clause requiring jitney
bus operators to file an indemnity
bend with the city clerk was held in
valid.
• • •
Dwelling houses and sites for stores
are in demand at Gary, Ind., as a re
sult of the announcement made by El
bert H. Gary, chairman of the United
States Steel corporation that the steel
industries in that city are to lie en
larged by the construction of a $25,
009,000 tube plant.
* * •
Sixteen nations are participating in
the big second year of the San Diego
Panama-California exposition, which
will be formally opened by President
Davidson at San Diego on March 18.
When the 1915 exposition closed De
cember 31, it had established a world’s
record for expositions by remaining
open for an entire year.
SPORTING.
Bennie Leonard outfought Johnny
Dundee in a ten-round bout in New
York, thus becomig eligible for a
match with Freddie Welsh for the
lightweight championship.
* * ♦
A bill to legalize fifteen-round box
ing bouts in Kentucky parsed the low
er house of the state legislature by a
vote of 48 to 27. Friends of the bill
claim it will pass in the senate
* • *
Frank C. Zehrung, president of the
Western league, announces that the
city having the largest opening at
tendance in 1916 will be presented
with a silver loving cup, presented by
Governor Capper of Kansas.
* * *
President Wilson will open the At
lantic Coast Bowling tournament in
Washington April 2 by rolling an en
graved ball down the alleys. The first
night will be known as “Woodrow Wil
son night," in honor of the president
• • *
Final approval for football games
on Thanksgiving day, with the stipula
tion that such games must be played
in the afternoon was given at a meet
ing of the Missouri Valley Conference
Governing Board at St. Louis. Post
season games were forbidden.
* • •
Frank Gotch and Joe Stecher were
offered a purse of $40,000 by John H
McIntosh representing the Copper
City Athletic club to wrestle for the
world’s championship in Butte, Mont.,
at the State Elks’ convention in July.
This is the largest bid yet made for
this match, the highest previous offer
having been made by a Chicago club.
WASHINGTON.
The senate, after four weeks of
debate, passed the Shields bill to pro
vide for development of waterpower
in navigable waters by private capital.
The vote was 4 to 22.
* * *
The senate passed a bill appropriat
ing $825,000 for throe new coast guard
cutters from New York harbor, the
Pacific coast and Alaska, and $240,000
for three river steamers to relieve
flood sufferers on the Mississippi and
its tributaries.
* * •
Despite the perils of submarine war
fare 400,000 persons crossed the Al
lantic between American and Euro
pean ports as passengers last year.
Figures assembled in the bureau of
navigation show that 250,000 of them
traveled on vessels owned by the bel
ligerents.
* • •
Rates of the Colorado & Southern,
and other roads on coal from South
Canon, Colo., to Wyoming, South Da
kota, Nebraska and Kansas were
found unjustly discriminatory by the
Interstate commerce commission in so
far as they exceed rates from Walsen
burg, Colo., to the same points by
more than 25 cents per net ton.
• * *
Manufacturing plants in seven lead
ing industries of tlie United States
have increased their working forces
an average of 15 per cent within the
last year, according to figures given
out hy the department of labor.
• • *
Three dreadnoughts and four battle
cruisers added to the American fleet,
built and authorized, would make it
the equal in fighting strength of the
present German fleet. Admiral Fletch
er, commander of the Atlantic fleet,
declared before the house naval com
mittee.
• « •
The house of representatives by a
vote of 276 to 142 killed the McLe
more resolution to warn Americans
off armed merchant ships of European
belligerents, thus giving President
Wilson a free hand In the German
submarine controversy. Representa
tives from Nebraska voted solidly
for the resolution. '
* • •
Orders approved by president Wil
son restore to entry 113,348 acres oi
public land In Wisconsin, 188,338 ac
res in eastern Utah and 10,988 acres
In western central Montana.
CANADA'S PUNS
FOB WARREVENUE
So Wisely Distributed That Tax
ation Will Affect Farmers to
a Degree Practically
Unnoticeable.
So many rumors have been circu
lated regarding war taxation In
Canada that the statement made by
Sir Thomas White, Canadian Minister
of Finance, of the Government’s plans
for raising war revenue should be giv
en the widest circulation. Sir Thomas
made it clear that the revenue will be
raised by taxing the protits of incor
porated companies whenever those
profits exceed seven per cent, and the
profits of unincorporated firms or part
nerships when the profits exceed ten
per cent. On all such excess profits
these companies or firms will have to
contribute one-quarter to the Govern
ment. Transportation companies,
banks, mining, milling, and other com
panies will be subject to this taxation,
but life insurance companies, and com
panies with less than fifty thousand
dollars capitalization, and companies,
firms, or individuals engaged in agri
culture or stock raising, are exempt,
and pay no part of this taxation. The
only other additional taxation pro
posed is an increase of fifty cents a
barrel in the customs duty on apples,
and one-half cent a gallon in customs
duty on certain kinds of oils.
It will be noticed that this taxation
is being applied in such a way that it
does not affect farmers in the slight
est degree, except, perhaps, through a
small increase in cost of apples and
oil. The war revenue is to be paid out
of the profits of the big firms and com
panies with capital of over fifty thou
sand dollars, and even these are al
lowed seven per cent in some cases,
and ten per cent in others of clear
profits before they have to pay any
part of this taxation. It will be seen
that the whole policy is to place the
war expenditure taxation on those who
have been making big profits and are
able to pay it, and to encourage farm
ing and stockraising by exempting
farmers and stock-raisers from the tax
ation. This ought to set at rest every
rumor that the farmer or the farmer’s
land is being taxed to pay the cost of
the war.—Advertisement.
Her Reason.
"Women,” remarked the mere man,
"are seldom capable of reasoning,”
"Don't you believe it.” replied the
female of the species.
"Why not?” he inquired.
“Well—because," she answered.
OLD PRESCRIPTION
FOR WEAK KIDNEYS
A medicinal preparation like Dr. Kil
mer's Swamp-Root, that has real curative
value almost sells itself. Like an endless
chain system the remedy is recommended
by those who have been benefited to those
who are in need of it.
Dr. Kilmer’s Swamp-Root is a physi
cian’s prescription. It has been tested
for years and has brought results to count
less numbers who have suffered.
The success of Dr. Kilmer's Swamp-Root
is due to the fact that it fufills almost ev
ery wish in overcoming kidney, liver and
bladder diseases, corrects urinary troubles
and neutralizes the uric acid which causes
rheumatism.
Do not suffer. Get a bottle of Swamp
Root from any druggist now. Start treat
ment today.
However, if you wish first to test this
great preparation send ten cents to Dr.
Kilmer & Co., Binghamton, N. Y., for a
sample bottle. When writing be sure and
mention this paper.—Adv.
Blocked by Her Think.
“I once thought seriously of marry
ing for money.”
“Why don’t you, then?”
“The girl in the case did -ome think
ing, too.”
RECIPE FOR GRAY HAIR.
To half pint of water add 1 oa. Bay Rum, a
small box of Barbo Compound, and H oz. of
glycerine. Apply to the hair twice a week
until it becomes the desired shade. Any drug
gist can put this up or you can mix it at
home at very little cost. It will gradually
darken streaked, faded gray hair, and re
moves dandruff. It is excellent for falling
hair and will make harsh hair soft and glossy.
It will not color the scalp, U not sticky or
greasy, and does not rub off.—Adv.
The Inexperienced One.
Belle—Is he a man of affairs?
Anne—Mercy, no! He never had a
chance. The first girl hi proposed to
accepted him.—Judge.
Mill
FOBS! CHILD
“California Syrup of Figs” can’t
harm tender stomach,
liver and bowels.
Every mother realizes, after giving
her children “California Syrup of
Figs” that this Is their Ideal laxative,
because they love Its pleasant taste
and It thoroughly cleanses the tender
little stomach, liver and bowels with
out griping.
When cross, irritable, feverish, or
breath is bad, stomach sour, look at
the tongue, mother! If coated, give a
teaspoonful of this harmless “fruit
laxative,” and in a few hours all the
foul, constipated waste, sour bile and
undigested food passes out of the bow
els, and you have a well, playful child
again. When its little system is full
of cold, throat sore, has stomach-ache,
diarrhoea, Indigestion, colic—remem
ber, a good "inside cleaning” should
always be the first treatment given.
Millions of mothers keep “California
Syrup of Figs” handy; they know a
teaspoonful today saves a sick child
tomorrow. Ask at the store for a 50
cent bottle of “California Syrup of
Figs,” which has directions for babies,
children of all ages and grown-upB
printed on the bottle. Adv.
Six children in England claim the
Prince of Wales as their godfather.
AMERICAN ARMY ENTERS MEX
ICO IN PURSUIT OF BANDITS.
FUNSTON DIRECTS EXPEDITION
Orders Are to Take Villa and His
Band, Dead or Alive—Seventeen
Killed in Columbus Raid.
Washington.—American troops, by
orders from President Wilson, have
crossed the Mexican border to take
Francisco Villa and his bandits, dead
or alive, as the result of the recent
raid by Vililstas on Columbus, N. M.,
when seventeen Americans were kill
ed and a score or more wounded.
Under the direction of Major Gen
eral Funston, who ended the Philip
pine insurrection by taking Aguinaldo
single-handed, American columns
consisting of about 5,000 men moved
across the international boundary to
meet about 3,000 guerrila troops in a
mountainous region, from which Car
ranza troops have fled. Whether this
lorg-dei'erred action, which begins
purely as a punitive measure to clear
northern Mexico of menacing bandit
bands over which General Carranza
has no control, shall grow into a gen
eral armc-d intervention or occupaicn
in Mexico depends in a large measure
upon General Carranza and the Mex
ican people.
After a brief cabinet meeting, at
which the president tvas described as
being as determined to eliminate Vil
la, as he was to eliminate Huerta,
Secretary Baker hurried to the War
department and as his first act in of
fice sent orders to the border troops.
Soon afterward the army general
staff assembled and conferred over
the plans, long drawn and perfected
since the Mexican situation loomed
up as a disturber to the peace of the
United States.
General Funston telegraphed urging
utmost secrecy of the armv plans. The,
border is honeycombed with Mexican
spies, and it was agreed that the ex
pedition will be pushed to success by
keeping Villa and his men ignorant of
its movements. It is possible that no
correspondents will be permitted to
accompany the columns. At any rate
a strict censorship will be imposed.
State department officials declined
to say what their attitude would be if
General Carranza took a hostile posi
tion. They said the United States
would settle that question when it
arose. If an offer of co-operation of
Carranza troops is made, they said,
it could hardly be refused.
Secretary Lansing announced that
no matter how far into Mexico it wa.
necessary for American forces to
penetrate, or to what numbers it be
came necessary to increase their
force, the United States would con
sider the expedition a punitive one
one purely for the suppression of out
laws. For such action there is ample
precedent in international taw and,
in fact, in the relations of the United
States with Mexico.
In sharp contrast to the stirring
scenes in congress two years ago
when President Wilson ordered the
fleet to Vera Cruz, the president’s ac
tion was received with marked com
placency in both house and senate.
Mexicans Kill Rancher.
Bisbee, Ariz.—An American ranch
er was killed when a band of approxi
mately 200 Mexican bandits crossed
the border southeast of Osborne Junc
tion, Ariz., according to reports
reaching here.
Many head of live stock were killed
or driven off by the bandits, it was
stated.
Tension High at Columbus.
Columbus, N. M.—Residents of
this town are in a state of high ten
sion as the result of the killing of
seventeen Americans by Villa and his
band of outlaws in last week’s raid.
Many buildings that were fired by
the raiding bandits were almost total
ly destroyed.
Bryan Says Plan O. K.
South Bend, Ind.—William J. Bryan
on his arrivel here gave out a state
ment in which he expressed approval
of President Wilson’s course in send
ing troops into Mexico after Villa.
Many Non-Combatants Killed.
London.—The number of non-com
batants killed by Great Britain’s ene
mies since the beginning of the war
aggregates 3,153. Premier Asquith an
nounced just recently.
Refinery to Resume.
Philadelphia.—The Franklin Sugar
refinery in this city, which has been
idle for more than a quarter of a cen
tury, will resume operations at once,
giving employment to 800 men.
. Women Declare Boycott on Sugar.
Cincinnati, O.—The national house
wives’ co-operative league has de
clared a ‘ boycott” on sugar and sent
out communications to all branches
of the league as well as to other wom
en’s societies urging co-operation.
The high price of sugar is the reason.
Many Britons Made Homeless.
London.—Hundreds have been made
homeless and thousands of acres of
farm lands In southwestern England
have been inundated as a result of
the overflow of rivers caused by snow.
Cornered by Police: Kills Self.
Lincoln, Neb.—After taking a negro
girl. Hazel Holcomb, from her escort
and keeping her prisoner in a barn
over night, Earl King, negro, took the
girl to his home, held police at bay
for two hours and finally blew out
his brains.
Must Pay for Killing Man.
Webster City, la.—Mrs. Agnes Alve
stad was awarded $1,500 damages in
the district court here against Dr. E.
W. Slater for running over and killing
Alvestad with his auto.
HIS SHARE OF THE HORSE
Interfering Individual Evidently Was
Not as Important as He Thought
He Was.
A newly admitted member of a big
co-operative society boasting sixteen
thousand members met one of the so
ciety's vans laden with coal, with
the driver sitting on the shafts.
The new member, full of the im
portance of belonging to such a big
society, considered it his duty to re
monstrate with the driver on his want
of consideration toward his horse by
adding his own weight to the load in
stead of walking. The fault-finder
wound up by saying: “I'm a share
holder in the society, ;.nd therefore
part owner of your horse and van.”
“Shareholder, are you?" responded
tne coaly, pulling a hair out of the
horse's tail and handing it to the as
tonished member, with the remark:
"Here's your share of the animal, mis
ter.”
He then drove on.
Soon Settled.
Father and mother were having a
little chat by the fire before retiring
for the night. The future of their
little ones was the interesting topic
of their conversation.
“Then what about Harold?" said fa
ther presently.
"Ah, Harold,” sighed mother. “I
sometimes wonder what will become
of Harold! He seems to take a fiend
ish delight in hurting his brothers and
sisters!”
“Is that so?” said father promptly.
“Then we'd better make him a den
tist!”
_
Everything in Stock.
A general merchant from Havre,
Munt., is in New York this week learn
ing the latest wrinkles in the art of
selling corsets. The merchant’s line of
goods at home includes lightning rods,
chewing tobacco, crackers, hoe han
dles, rope, molasses, rat traps, canned
goods, matches, calico, assorted nails
and corsets. And it is a good bet
that if the truth were known, prunes,
sheet music and bustles may be ob
tained at his store—or if he didn't
have them he could order ’em for you.
Rough on the Water.
The hobo had just been forced to
have a bath before being allowed to
lodge at the municipal lodging house.
"Well, wThat have you to say now?”
inquired the attendant as the previ
ously unkempt individual emerged
much disgusted.
The hobo glared.
"Water,” ho remarked solemnly, "is
the curse of bathtubs.”
Willing. ,
"Why don’t you take something for
that cold of yours?”
“What would you advise me to
take?”
“Quinine.”
"Nothing doing. I was in hopes you
were going to say rock and rye.”—
New York World.
Wise Provision.
“Beauty is "nly skin deep.”
“1 consider that a wise provision »if
nature.”
“Why sc ?”
“With that limitation, the girls are
kept busy en'ugh.”—Kansas City Jour
nal.
The city of Copenhagen is daily con
suming about 25,000 pounds of Ameri
can salt pork.
A widow can be as much interested
in a man as if be were interesting.
STRAIN ON THE IMAGINATION
Company Was Willing to Believe a
Lot, But Longbow's Story Was
Too Much for Them.
Mr. Stretcher—Yes, it’s cold, but
nothing like what it was at Christmas
three years ago, when the steam from
the engines froze hard and fell on the
line in sheets.
Mr. Cuffer—And yet that wasn’t so
cold as in ’87, when it froze the elec
tricity in the telephone wires, and
when the thaw came all the machines
were talking as hard as they could
for upwards of five hours.
“Well, gentlemen," said Mr. Long
j bowr, “the coldest year that I can re
| member was in the Christmas week
in ’84, when the very policemen had to
run to keep themselves warm.”
But that was too much, and with
silent looks of indignation the other
two left to his own reflections the
man who treated the truth so slightly.
Safety First.
A missionary in a slum district pre
sented a ragged little urchin with a
new suit of clothes. More than a
week passed away, and the mission
ary met his little friend again.
Being well acquainted with the con
dition cf the boy’s home, and the
drunken father, who pawned every
thing he could lay his hands on, ha
was surprised and pleased to find that
the lad still wore the suit.
“Still wearing your suit?" he asked,
and there was a word of pathos in
the lad’s reply.
"Yes, sir; I've slept in it.”
Enough Evidence.
Two rustics in the old country were
discussing, one day, a newly erected
postal pillar box in a village street.
For a long time they were unable to
think of its use, when suddenly one
said:
“Ah knaw; it belong® to the Salva
tion Army; that's why it’s painted
red.”
But after a little consideration the
other replied:
“Na, na; ye're wrong, lad; it can’t
belong to them, because it says, ’No
collection on Sunday.’ ”
Habitual With Him.
“Loogy yuh, Br udder Tump!” se
verely said good old Parson Bagster.
"What makes yo' beat yo’ wife?”
“Uh-well, sah,” replied the wretch,
“dis lady am muh •ou’th wife. I
fawmed de habit years ago o’ beatin'
muh fust wife uh-kase she needed it,
and I’ve sawtuh been beatin' muh
wives in rotation ever sinct, out ’o
custom. Yo' knows yo’se’f how hard
it is to break off a habit when it’s
don got its claws socked on to yo'.”—
Kansas City Star.
Not So Much.
“My name is Jones and I’m from
New York,” announced the traveler to
the keeper of a hotel in Minot, N. D.
“That’s funny,’’ remarked the land
lord. "I know a man by that, name
out in Butte, Mont.”
Whereupon the New Yorker realized
that this is indeed a small world and
that he was about the smallest thing
in it.
Couldn't Forget Him.
Uncle George—Come here, Willie!
Don't you know who I am?
Willie—You bet I do! You are inn's
brother who stayed here two month9
one time and never offered to pay a
cent for board. Oh, yes; I’ve heard
pa speak of you often. •
The camelia was carried from Japan
to France by a missionary named Ka
i mel.
A Leading
Food Expert
stood before the big battery of milling machines in the
Grape-Nuts factories at Battle Creek, Mich., and after
inspecting both the wheat and flour said to the miller:
“That’s selected wheat, and no ‘patent flour’ stunt,
either. That wheat comes out of the rolls as honest
and unrefined as it went in. Where did you ever make
flour before that retained the true mineral content of
the grain?”
And the wise miller replied: “I have worked in
a good many mills, and 1 am no youngster, but let
me tell you, 1 never made whole wheat flour like that
until I came with this company.”
The truth is, white flour is wofully lacking in certain
essential mineral elements which are thrown out in the
milling to make flour white and pretty, and its use
frequently results in impaired health and activity.
The famous pure food,
Grape-Nuts
is made of honest whole wheat and malted barley; and
supplies in splendid proportion all the brain- and nerve
making, bone- and muscle-building elements of the
field grains, including their mineral elements.
Rich, nut-like flavour, ease of serving, and quick
digestibility have made Grape-Nuts a household word
the country over.
“There's a Reason” for Grape-Nuts
Sold by Grocers everywhere.