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About The Loup City northwestern. (Loup City, Neb.) 189?-1917 | View Entire Issue (May 27, 1909)
With the World’s Great Humorists Selections from the Writings of the 'Best Kjnotetn MaKerj of Mirth. Ghosts and Wolves By Stanley Waterloo. it is held by the Fibo Folk—Swedes who inhabit the shores and islands oi the .Gulf of Riga—that occasionally the dead who have been carelessly buried or have some account to seitle with the living, wander abroad at night as ghosts of a more or less malignant character, according to their natural disposition when alive. Nevertheless there is one recourse for the Eibo native who encounters one of these wraiths upon the highway or anywhere else at night. He has but to say, if he still retain courage enough to speak. “Go thou to the wolves!" and the ghost must then fling himself away into a wild race across the country. He has no alterna tive. It is some law of the underworld, 'ihen the wolves—and there are many in that wild region—not only see, but scent, the fleeing thing (for when wolves appear, it becomes real flesh and blood; and pursue and tear down and kiil and devour it, and that is the end of that particular ghest. There probably isn't a more com monplace and respectable business man in Chicago than Clopton. He is decently educated, well married and lives in a suburb, bis home being quite a distance from the cars. Clop ton got hold of some old folk lore book and read of the queer belief of the people about the Gulf of Riga. That same day, as it chanced, a man from Nebraska advertised for sale a half tamed dark-colored wolf, one of a lot of cubs he had dug out of a den on the Platte river and brought along to Chi eago with him on his way with a car load of cattle. Clopton purchased and cultivated that wolf, which animal acted very much like an ordinary dog. One evening when the rest of the family were away, Clcpton went down » The Pet Wc!f Was Licking His Face. into the back yard and let the wolf loose. Then he went upstairs and un dressed and got into a pair ot white pa- , jamas. That, he figured, would make him look enough like a ghost. His idea was to go down to the back door and show himself on the steps lead ing into the yard, to see what the wolf would do. He acted upon the in spiration and slipped and tumbled down into th4 yard. Then things hsp penedl Of course he was a ghost. The dint light from the street lamps, slant ing on him, made him look like a dis torted White Thing with some ani mate deyil inside. The wolf, at the other end of the yard, gave one wild hungering and demoniac yelp as he saw the awful thing descend and then, like a rat cornered, went for it! Clop ton was quicker. Clopton went over the fence. Clopton, a ghost, was pur sued by a wolf! They made a somewhat harrowing and glaring way up north toward Evanston and Milwaukee and the Pole. Clopton had run well in col lege and he ran three hundred and seventy-five thousand times better now than he ever ran before. The wolf got excited; he was close to Clopton, with heaving flanks, when Clopton turned suddenly and dived back again almost straight at the wolf, but barely dodging him, and then backward the long chase began. When Clopton revived, his wife and oldest daughter were beside him and the pet wolf was licking his face. "How he must have loved you,” said Mrs. Clopton, “to have been looking after you all the while you’ve been out. ami when you were so feverish!” Clopton was ill of typhoid fever for a week or two and is all right now. Of course there was no wolf chase. But Clopton is fooiish over that wolf and is trying to turn him into a real dog. (Copyright, 1909, by W. G Chapman.) The Joke on Jinx By Judd Mortimer Lewis. omx nimseu into tne nouse witn i the latch-key, carefully removed his coat and vest and hung them up. and slid into his lounging coat; then he pulled off his shoes and tossed them under the hat-rack, and opening a bun dle he had brought with him he re moved from their tissue-paper wrap pings a pair of new and resplendent slippers and after looking at them lov ingly for a few minutes pulled them onto his feet and started on an ex ploration of the flat, expecting to find Mrs. Jinx wrestling with her compara tively new household problems in the kitchen. But no Mrs. Jinx material ized. Hearing a key turn in the lock of the front door he composed himself. "Well, would you look at that?” came a musical voice front the parlor door, but Jinx paid not the slightest downstairs to complain to the janitor about the lack of gas pressure she did not find the janitor, but she did find a pair of slippers that had evidently been in constant use since pre historic, times, and she sized up their run down heels, their worn-through soles, and their ragged and dirty uppers with delight; and she sneaked them be neath her apron anil hurried back up stairs; and that night when Jinx was soundly sleeping she removed the new slippers from the'r package and hiding them substituted the old slippers in their place, carefully re-wrapping and tying the package. And the next morning when Jinx went away he car ried the package beneath his arr. At seven o'clock that night there was no Jinx. At eight o’clock no Jinx. At nine she called up his office and could get no answer to her rings. At ten o’clock she was angry. At eleven she was frightened. At twelve she went to the wardrobe for her hat and coat. And there on the bed In the bed room lay Jinx fast asleep! He had sneaked in the back way while she watched the front door and had gone to bed! "Oh-oh-oh-oh!” said Mrs. Jinx, be neath her breath. “Isn't he a devil!” As she lay beside him, trying to go tc sleep, an imaginary picture of Jinx trying to exchange those slippers came ' before her mind’s eye and the bed shook with her suppressed giggles. Finally an arm stole about her neck in the darkness and a voice said in her ear: "You darned little old rascal you! There’s one woman who can play a joke, anyhow!” (Copyright, 1909. by W. G. Chapman.) f “He Carried the Package Beneath His Arm.” attention. “And new slippers!—Well, wouldn't that tickle your feet!—Those are dongolas, aren't they, By?” “No. they are not dongolas. What I should like to know is what you have got a home for. what you have got a husband for, what have 1 got a wife for, what—Oh. pshaw! Dear!” “Sure enough, weren’t you angry at all when you came home and found me out?” “Nope, I was .only disappointed.” “All right, but what appears to be the matter with your feet?” “These confounded slippers are too tight, that’s all.” “Well, take them right off and wrap them up before you get them soiled and 1 will ’phone down to the store in the morning and have them send for them and send you a larger pair. “I'll take ’em off and wrap ’em up all right, but I’ll take 'em along and change them myself in the morning.” That evening when Mrs. Jinx went His Trip By Norman H. Crowell. The fat man with the biilgey nose d«jpped onto a stool in front of the soda fountain and blinked fiercely at his reflection in the glass. He rapped on the bar and held three fingers up in front of him. “What is it?'' asked the clerk. “Soda, root beer, lemo—” “Whiskey, son!” snapped the fat man. “Not here—we're just out," said the clerk. The customer looked dared, then shook his head sadly. "Too bad—too bad—after a trip like I've just been through. It's too rotten bad!” “What, trip was that?” Inquired the clerk, after a brief hesitation. “Eh? Well, son. I'll tell you. It was going gome, that trip was. I’d started to visit an uncle in Chicago. Got down into the country a ways and the en gineer fell dead in the cab. That scared the fireman so bad lie dropped his shovel and jumped off. There we were going 70 miles an hour and steam rising every minute. I crawled up front—over the coal—reached the engine and was trying to stop her when I saw a little girl on the track. Out I jumps, and begins crawling for ward on the horse's neck—right up back of his ears, you know—” “What's that?” ejaculated the clerk. “The race-horse, you recollect. If the kid on the track didn't get away I’d have to grab it and I was reaching down in front of that animal's hoofs watching my chance. It was mighty ticklish but I reckoned I could pull it off providing the gasoline held out and the—” “What gasoline?” “Sure! We was running pretty low on gasoline and there wasn't a garage within 20 miles of us. Well, I steered that auto as close to the cliff as I dared and was leaning over the bon net waiting to snatch that pesky kid when all at once the screw propeller got fouled among the rocks and left us—” "Screw propeller? Say, am I awake?” demanded the clerk. "On the submarine, you understand That left us flat on the bottom of the bay, helpless as a kitten on an Ice berg. While we was running around locating the trouble I happened to look over the edge of the basket and saw that we were dropping like a bullet—’ The clerk tried to speak but merely hiccoughed. “And I accordingly began heaving over sandbags for all I was worth We’d been up over seventy-five hours then and was out to beat the recorc or die trying. Well, we’d gone about two miles when I noticed a terrible big stretch of open water dead aheac and before we could drop the sail the iceboat had scudded right into it. It was the coldest bath I ever took or. short notice, son.” “Exactly; and what did you do next?” prompted the clerk. Well, I swam three miles across that hole with my partner on my back carrying the boat. Then we put on our skates and skated home. I just came down town to get the cotton bat ting out of my eye-teeth and—what did you say this was? A ticket agency or a lunch counter?” “Soda fountain!” said the clerk. “Is that so? Let me out, sor.—let me out!” The clerk watched him make the door—then smiled and parted his hair carefully in the middle before the glass. (Copyright, 1909, by W. Cl. Chapman.t Easily Kept Ahead of Train And Witnesses Declare Razorback I Didn’t Have to Do Much Sprint ing at That. , “For several years I have been a commuter on the Erie,” said the sun burned man, "and I have joined in the general raillery at the expense of that unique system. But never again. I have just come from Florida where thev have railroads compared with which the Erie is the personification of rapid transit. If you get off the main line of travel in Florida you are up against it good and plenty. “I wanted to get rrom Tampa over to the east coast, anil part of the itin erary took in a branch road from Orange City Junction to New Smyrna. The distance is 27 miles. You leave Orange City Junction at 4:35 p. m., and if the train is on time it gets you to New Smyrna at 7:15. Only two | hours and forty minutes to come 27 miles! That's all. Two trains a day are operated over this road—combina tion passenger and freight trains. “There used to be an engineer named Bill Rogers who ran this after noon train. He’s dead now. I un derstand the strenuous life was too much for him. Bill used to be great ly annoyed by the razorbsick hogs that roam at large through the country, branded just like cattle. There was one hog in particular that gave Bill a lot of trouble. Every evening he could be found lying comfortably be tween the rails at a poi.it about two miles outside of New Smvi na, and Bill would have to climb down from his cab and pry the hog off tie track with a crowbar. “Well, Bill had a grouch on one (lay, and when he saw that hog stretched out in the usual wallow he determined to defy the law. So, in stead of stopping to pry the hog off the track, he opened up his throttle and started for the obstruction at full speed. Just as the engine was almost upon him the hog seemed to realize that something was wrong. Not wait ing for the usual assistance, he got up, shook himself and started down the track ahead of the engine. And I have the assurance of at least a doz en respectable witnesses that the hog beat the train into New Smyrna sta tion by a fraction over three minutes!" —New York Press. What He Was. Apropos of President Taft s boost of the possum into sudden fame, former Gov. Glenn tells this one: Three colored brethren, high church men, all, happening to meet at a cross roads one day, fell into a discussion. Deacon Jackson stated that in his opinon the country was going to the dogs, therefore he allowed he was a pessimist. Elder Hightower combatted this view, seeing that the panic was about over and the price of cotton was on the rise. He declared himself a firm optimist. W hen Deacon Powell was called on for his opinion, he scratched his head reflectively for a moment and said: “Well, brudderin’, hit ’pears to me dat 'simmons is 'bout ripe now, thuffo’ 1 'spects I is a ’posbumistl" Embroidery Motifs to Be Applied to Bridal Lingerie. I - would be ditticult to imagine anything more adorably dainty than the lingerie for the June bride Ribbons, laces, and exquisite, fairylike em broideries are used in combination with sheer lawns, the finest batistes and delicate inuils. It goes without saying that all bridal lingerie is made entirely by hand, the seams being pur together with fine entre deux. Nearly every bride en joys putting in a few dainty stitches on her trousseau, and so we are giving several designs for embroidery which may be traced on the garment after it is cut out. Often a girl is too busy to make the articles herself, and wishes only to do the embroidery, in that case the garment may be completed with any edges that are to be scalloped simply left raw. Then one can trace on the scallops and work them with a buttonhole stitch. Three examples of scallops are shown. The scallops are worked, and then the cloth cut away from them. In the upper portion of the sketch are shown several examples of dainty lingerie which offer suggestions for the application of the embroi dery motifs given below, which are exactly right as they stand to be traced on the garments TO HOLD THE POWDER PUFF. Dainty and Most Useful Bag Makes an Acceptable Present for the Traveler. A dainty bag for a powder niff to be given to a friend who travels much should be made trom a circle of paste board. four inches In diameter, another circle three inches in diameter, and a bone or wooden ring, three inches in diameter. Cover the two pasteboard circles with a layer of cotton batting, then outside and in with ecru china silk of a Arm quality. Cut a strip of the silk 22 inches long and six deep, join the ends together, gather the bottom and overcast to the largest circle. Gather the upper edge around the bone circle. Overcast or fasten the smaller circle o£. pasteboard to the top of the bone ring at the back, tor a lid. and provide it with a loop to fasten on a button just below the ring on the bag. Make a loose chamois bag to slip In side the silk one to hold powder and puff. Such a case is collapsible and much lighter than carrying a glass or -•liver powder box in a traveling bag. BLACK CHIP HAT. With Large Wreath of Dark Red Roses and Black Satin Bow. Keep Your Hat on Straight. Many women, either from a peculiar construction of the head or from not knowing how to pin a hat securely, wear their headgear at a rakish angle that Is, to put it mildly, not becoming. it you are one of those unfortunates and are tired of being told to put your hat on straight try what weighting it on the light side will do. Sew little pieces of lead in among the trimming on the side that tips up, and you will have no further difficulty in keeping your headgear as convention decrees it should be worn. ' One-Piece House Frocks. Women who have to superintend or do much of their housework will be foolish not to avail themselves of the fashion for one-piece frocks. They are excellent for the working hours. They are narrow, trim, short, and have no undue trimming to rumple and soil in a day’s wearing. They fasten down the front, usually down the left side from the shoulder with pearl buttons. One can get these buttons with patent clamps, so that they may be removed [ when the frock goes to wash. NOVEL BELT WITH A BORDER Casing of White Linen Worked In Colored Mercerized Cottons Has a Good Appearance. Very new in belts is a casing of white linen with a conventionalized border worked in colored mercerized cottons the same tone as a heavy rib bon belling which is run through it. The casing is cut about an inch wider than the belting and has an ir regular viney edge and different shaped medallions embroidered on each edge, with vertical designs run ning through them. The edges of tile casing and medallions are worked in narrow buttonhole stitch and then cut out. The latter thus makes slides which come over the heltiiig. The flowers are worked in satin stitch. A clover design worked in green is effective for wenring with a green belt, while with a brown one a con veutionalized motif of chestnuts and leaves should be embroidered and buttonholed in browns. The edges of the oval, oblong or square medallion slides are finished in straight button hole stitch about a sixteenth of an inch deep or less. Black Chiffon Gown. A strikingly beautiful gown observed recently was of black chiffon mounted over a white satin sheath. The chiffon was handsomely embroidered in silver. Four narrow bands of silver trimming ran the entire length of the sides and pointed off in tunic effect back and front. The hem. trail and edge of the simu lated tunic were embroidered in great round motifs of effective design in sil ver threads and sequins. The little cap sleeves were silver embroidered and there were small white tuile el bow puffs. A cluster of red flowers on the low necked corsage and a large black hat of lovely contours and trimmed with tall, softly drooping black ostrich plumes completed the picture. Nail Polish in Tubes. The latest toilet novelty is a nail polish, which comes in a tube, and can be pressed out like artist’s pigments. The polish Itself Is of a consistency between a cream and a liquid, easy to put on. The case is a neat little one, nickel plated, with a top that pulls out. and furnished with an ejector to force out the enamel. New Fashions in Watches. Girls are in raptures over the new watches, which grow smaller and smaller, being now so microscopic that they are worn like a locket on the neck chain. They come ;n every sort of design, from those heavily lncrusted with jewels to the metals without or namentation, and one that would make the heart of any girl glad is of very thin gold, open-faced, of course, as all these watches are, its encased side, which is the side to show when wear ing it locket fashion, decorated by the initial of the wearer done in tiny tur quoises. A gold and turquoise chain completes this fascinating bauble. Instead of Soap. Many women find that soap irritates the skin. In such a case try using almond meal instead of soap. Bathe the face with warm water, moisten the hands, take up a little meal in the palms and massage the face, afterward rinsing well. Then dry thoroughly. Almond meal is very cleansing, but, being slightly oily, it does not dry up the skin. COLONY HOUSE FOR 1 POULTRY IS MUCH BEST A Far Ahead of Other Buildings for 5-helter and Handling the Stock and Convenience—By J. W. Griffin. The best thing I have Seen lately in the colony poultry house line is il lustrated in the accompanying pen sketch. All will admit that have used them that the colony house for poul try or hogs is far ahead of the general run of large houses as far as conveni ence of handling the stock and the general conditions are concerned. To have the best when it costs but a very little more should be our aim. says J. Wesley Griffin in farmers' Review-. From the time the chicks are put with the mother hen until each individual pullet is ready to start out in the world upon the duty of mother hens, this house may be altered to suit each period of her existence without the least expense over first cost. The building is Sxl2 feet square, 7 feet high in front and 5 feet high in the rear, inside measure. This gives 96 square feet floor space in the house. We will start a hen with 20 chicks. It is much better to start a hen with 20 chicks, give them careful attention and raise them all than to start her with 28 or 30, expecting her to lose a part or enough to dwindle down to 20. Ninety-six feet of floor space is plenty of room at first for a fresh air. When laying time ro:u. cracker and canned good boxes • the grocer's are set around the w for nest3. This house is easy to build, e keep clean and free from mitt easy to move from place to pi being built upon runners. The ; of material for the house is lows: "t Two pieces 2xG-ineh sill3 12 f. ( long. Two pieces 2x6-inch runners, it long. Seven pieces 2xG-ineh joists, 8 f- • long. Seven pieces 2x4-inch rafters, 10 feet long. Two pieces 2x4 inch plaits, 14 fo •• long. Siding, 300 feet. Common flooring for sheeting, lit feet. Good flooring for floor. 96 feet Two sash for glass, 3x3 feet. Four sash lor cloth, 3x3. Four pair small hinges for sash. One pair hinges for door. Twenty-five pounds assorted na.. One and one-half squares roofing The cost of the material at pr- ~ prices will be in the neighbor!: A Colony House. hen and 20 chicks, but later on they v-ill utilize it all. The coop sets be fore one window, the dust box before the other. At the rear of the room is a perch pole one foot from the floor. By the time the chicks are seven or eight weeks old they are roosting on this. Then the coop is taken away, which gives more floor space. As the weather becomes v/armer the glass sash are taken out during the day and cloth sash put in their place, the glass being returned at night. Later on the glass may be left oflt entirely. The cloth sash at the bottom are hung like those at the top. which, when raised, and held in position as shown in cut. gives a shade for each window and allow free circulation in the house of $30. The carpenter's work will cost about $10, making a total cost for tht^k house about $40. It may be cheap in some cases, especially if the farce r can do his own building. In buying material for several houses, say ten or twelve, the cost of the individual house is reduced about ten per cent. In a field of twenty-five or thirty acres that is in meadow or pasture with plenty of nice shade trees, ten or twelve of these houses scattered over it look very pretty. Hut still prettier are the little chicks when about grown, each flock at feeding time pick ing amound its home. And ye‘ prer tier, the swell in the bank account at selling time. INDIAN CORN IS GREATEST CROP Total Value Exceeds That of Cot ton, Hay a nd Wheat. Greatest of all crops Is Indian corn, the priceless gift of the Indian, who freely gave to the white naan informa tion which led to the production of 2,643,000,000 bushels this year. The crops of three years have exceeded this, but only the crop of one year— 1906—exceeded It very much. The value of th s crop almost sur passes belief. It is $1,615,000,000. This wealth that has grown out of the soil in four months of rain and sunshine, and some drought, too, is enough to cancel the interest-bearing debt of the United States and to pay for the Pan ama canal and 50 battleships. The price of corn Is exceptionally high. There are only two years in the record of this department in which the farm price of this crop was as high as it is for this year. In 1SS1 the price was 63.6 cents: in 1901. when there was only two-thirds of an ordinary crop, the price was 60.5 cents. The total value of this crop is by far the highest ever reached. The crop of 1902 was worth $1,000,000,000, and the crops of 1904, 1905 and 1906 were worth $100,000,000 more; the great increase of $100,000,000 over the crop of 1902 was made in 1907, and now the increase is $600,000, equal to the gold in the treasury of a rich na tion. The corn crop far exceeds in value the prominent farm crops next below. It Is worth nearly as much this year as the great crops of cotton, hay and wheat combined. In comparison with the averages of the preceding five years, the quantity of the corn crop of this year is 2.1 per cent, higher and the value 42.6 per cent, higher. Diamonds Handled by Wholesale. One Amsterdam factory alone cuts 4,000,000 diamonds every year. Care of Garden Acquired.—There are certain general laws and prtnci pies underlying all garden work. It is necessary for the gardener to master these in order to become success! il and always meet the unexpected I: is not enough to know simply what plant foods are good for corn, but what plant foods all crops require. It is well to know how to kill cabbag caterpillars, but it is better to know > how to kill all biting insect pests. But when one has learned the gen eral principles of growing plants, it is then essential to acquire special knowledge of special crops. There are a dozen, and sometimes a hundred, small special facts, peculiar to each garden plant. A knowledge of these special facts makes possible sucres, in growing special crops. Some of these may be acquired by reading - listening to what others say. yet tie y ^ can never be fully mastered till one has had several years of actual experi ence. They must be absorbed at first hand to be fully appreciated. Sugar Beets as Feed.—It lias been clearly demonstrated by many prut • cal and scientific experiments that green feeds are very valuable for any live stock, furnishing actual too! values, aiding digestion, toning t system and promoting genera! health. Chickens lay more eggs, pigs grow faster and cows give more milk in summer than at any other season, mainly because they have access to green feeds. On every diversified farm where poultry, pigs, cows and other animals ^ are kept from half an acre to an acrt*^"^ or more of stock sugar beets, rnang. ! wurtzels, carrots and like green roots should be given for winter feeds Hogs Kill Subterranean Insects.— Hogs are very useful in contending with white grubs and subterranean i:. sects. If a sufficiently large herd of hogs can be turned loose into an in fested field the fall before it is to be planted to a new crop, and continued therein until seeding time the nex' spring, they will do more than an* other agency to insure a good harvest from such land. Skim Milk for Pigs.—The usefulness of fresh, warm skim milk from the farm separator is by no means con fined to the raising of young calves. Young pigs, if anything, thrive and grow even better on it than young calves do. A series of experiments conducted at the Storrs agricultural experiment station in Connecticut shows conclus ively that the skim milk produced bet ter results than rich milk or even poor whole milk. One lot of pigs were fed all of the skim milk they would drink. The second lot was fed on ordinary whole milk, and the third lot was fed on rich milk. At the end of 40 days the pigs receiving the skim milk made an average gain of 31 pounds. The pigs receiving the ordinary milk made an average of 27.4 pounds and the lot re ceiving the rich milk made an average gain of 21.1 pounds.. As the trial prog ressed this rate of gain w’as main tained. The Culture of Asparagus.—One of the best and easiest grown of our garden perennials is the asparagus plant. It can be started either from seed or from plants. If one wishes to raise plants to sell it is better, of course, to plant the seeds, but if as paragus is wanted for home or mar ket use, in the shortest time possible, it is better to set out yearling seed lings. It is important in laying our the asparagus plantation to select a place where it can remain permanent ly, for if taken proper care of th* plantation will last 20 years. The land selected should be deep, rich, fertile moist and cool soil, having a warm exposure, a gradual southern slope be ing preferred. Rear Admiral Colville has a pretty gift in the art of punning (writes a correspondent). A frier him on one occasion to sea, was about to abando_ .. ...._ position he held in a draper's shop ft" the cockpit. “So you are going to sea are you?” asked the admiral “Yes. sir.” “To what department of indtts try, may I ask, do you now de" your energies?” “To silk, sir.'' rt sponded the lad. “Well, go to s< a. ^ responded the admiral, “and it will b«£ worsted.”—M. A. P. The Worst in Puns. youth who, smitten with
