The Loup City northwestern. (Loup City, Neb.) 189?-1917, October 22, 1908, Image 6
JOHN HENRY Jk ON WOMEN AND POKER GY GEO. V. HOBART, ("HUGH M'HUGH”) Dear Bunch: Say, Bunch, I don't think women have any business play ing poker, anyway—that is most women. There are a few cheerful exceptions, • of course. Take Monday evening for example. George Riggaby dealt, and I being next, passed. Then we waited while Maude said to Peaches, “Oh! yes, I think a bodice trimmed with moire antique and with white chiffon over the cor sage is perfectly stunning, but 1 want to get a house dress of green silk with lace insertion—oh. did you see Mrs. Wilson's new automobile coat? If she isn't a perfect fright; well, I hope—” “Pass! Pass! Pass!” I yelled. Then Mrs. Lorrenz, paying no at tention to us, unburdened herself to Peaches: “And do you know, our new cook lost one of my handsome silver spoons that's been in our family for generations, and I didn’t dare say any thing to her about it, because she'd leave, and I know what trouble I had last time finding a cook. But a hand some silver spoon—” "What do you do?” I shrieked at Peaches, who sat next to me. “What do I do? What do you mean? What do 1 do!” “Do you pass, or do you open it?" “Oh! I pass. You needn't yell so, I'm sure. Do you know. Mrs. Lorrenz, the same thing happened to us, only ours was a fork; yes, a silver fork, sne of a set that Aunt Martha gave us for a wedding present, and don't you know, when—” Then all of a sudden Maude yelled. “Oh, I open it. No, I don’t—I thought I had an ace—darnaluck!" Whereupon Mrs. Lorrenz laid her hand down and began to count her chips, declaring that a white one was missing. After looking over the table and un der the table and on the mantelpiece and all around the room, she finally found the white chip under the hand she had laid down. When peace was restored George Riggaby said, "I’ll open it for ten!" Whereupon Mrs. Lorrenz screamed. "No, you won't. I'll open it for five!” “But you said you passed.” "I didn't!” “Pardon, me, I thought you did!” “Pardon, me, I thought I didn't!” “Cards?" asked George, resignedly. “Gi'me three.” I said. “Three,” said Peaches. “No, two, no, three—wait a minute! Gi'me one —no. wait; that's a diamond. Give me two—no, no; give me three cards!” “That's the way with me,” said Maude to Peaches; “I get so confused sometimes. I remember one evening we were all playing over at our house, and the baby—” “Cards?” screamed George. Maude gave him a withering glance, and Mrs. Lorrenz said, “One card, please!” George gave his mother-in-law the card, took throe himself and laid the deck down. “Well, I'd like to know where my two cards are?” inquired Maude scathingly. “Well, I thought you stood pat,” said George. “Stood pat; the idea!” snapped “Pass! Pass! Pass!” I Yelled. . Maude. “I never did such a thing in ! my life. I’d like two cards, please.” “It’s too late now.” i butted in. “You'll have to play your hand or drop out.” • “Drop out, indeed. Well, I guess not! George Riggaby, you give me two cards!” “Can't do it; against the rules,” said George. "Against what rules?” “Hoyle.” “Who cares for Hoyle. You gi’me two cards!” And so to keep peace i;i the family she was given two cards—and won the pot. Then Mrs. Lorrenz got mad and wanted her ante back, all of which put us another half hour to the bad. If I had to play hen poker very often, Bunch, I'd have a roller rink in my pot story. A little later on that evening I opened a jackpot, and everybody dropped out except Mrs. Lorrenz and Peaches. You know. Bunch. I like Peaches. She’s the only wire I vere. had, and the only one l ever wish to have, and so I say it from my heart that she plays poker like a Welsh rabbit, which is without form and full of dark surprises. From a social point of view Peaches is the best fellow that ever drew cards, but judged solely on her skill as a pokerine she is what the ancient Greeks would call a Patricia Bolivar. Well, anyway. Bunch, to make a long story lose its cunning. Peaches waved farewell after losing four dol lars, which was all in the family any way'; but Mrs. Lorrenz bit her lip and trailed. Yes, sir, she trailed with all the danger signals set until she had sent seven of her good dollars to the Bad Banda, then she called me When I laid down four typewriters she called me again—but I'd hate to tell you what. Never before. Bunch, in the history of the game did one woman get mad in so many different places at the same time. You see, Bunch, she had four deuces all the time, and after the first bet she began to buy a new dress. After the second bet she selected the trimmings. After the third bet she changed the material and took something more ex pensive. After the fourth bet she decided to pick out an imported dressmaker on Che Called Me Again—Eut I'd Hate to Tell You What. Fifth avenue, and after the fifth bet she felt wealthy enough to go there in a cab. Soon came the awful awakening, and she had to put the dress back in the store. I don't think Mrs. Lorrenz will ever quite recover from the shock. She will be a saddened woman all her life unless a rich relative dies somewhere and leaves her seven dol lars. And to make matters more like a life insurance investigation, about ten minutes later George Higgaby stung Uncle Gregory for $5.75, which caused uncle to go up in the air. After bouncing between the floor and the ceiling for five minutes he had an internal fit, which nearly be came epidemic all over his system. And thus it happened. Runch, that these two members in good standing in the ancient order of the Com panions of the Cold Feet had to sit there all evening and play them close, trying to get their money back, which ! they didn't. The mills of the gods grind slowly, Bunch, but once in a while they grind ; out something worth while. Play poker if you must. Bunch, but j always keep your rubbers on. This goes for the neck as well as the feet. Yours to the finish, JOHN. (Copyright. 190S, by O. W. Gillingham Co.) BILL SAW HIS CHANCE. Willing to Pay Three Dollars to Get Rid of “Old Woman.” Bill, who was employed in the ca pacity of ostler at a wayside inn, was standing at the yard gates with I he inevitable bit of straw in his mouth, wondering if life was worth living. Before leaving home in the morn ing he had engaged in a wordy war fare with his wife, and had decidedly come off second best. In the midst of his meditation a break, filled with ladies on iheir way to a well known resort, pulled up to allow the driver to bait his horses. After seeing to the animals. Bill and the driver adjourned inside to refresh the inner man. “Not much of a day for a drive," said Bill. “Where's yer going with that lot?” “O,”* said the driver, in an offhand manner, “I'm'going to Burnham.” After thinking deeply for a few min utes, Bill inquired, “Got room for one?" "Yus,” was the reply. “Cost yer two and a half.” Hurriedly Bill clutched the driver by the arm and excitedly whispered, "Do us a favor, mate, and wait ten minutes while I go home and fetch the old woman and I'll give yer three dollars, if you burn ’em good."— Rehoboth Sunday Herald. Royal Composers. The Princess Friedrich Luitpold, sis ter of the kaiserin, one of whose com positions was recently performed at a sacred concert at Dresden, is the latest recruit to the ranks of royal composers who have challenged pub lic criticism. The duchess of Orleans, eldest daughter of the Arch duke Joseph of Austria has won golden opinions by her charming songs, many of them set to Hungarian words; the Archduchess Marie Valerie of Austria has also composed a number of pretty song3; the Princess Feodora of Reuss (a prin cess of Saxe-Meiningen) is credited with considerable talent and originality in composition; and the Grand Dueh ; ess Cyril of Russia, also possesses con j siderable gifts as a composer. The male royalties whose musical talent has taken the same direction are quite numerous, ranging from the German emperor and the Grand Duke Michael Michaeiovitch of Russia, who made his debut some years ago with the '‘In fluenza March,” composed while suf fering from that uninspiring ailment, to the blind Landgraf of Hosse-Cassel, incomparably the most, talented of all royal musicians, whose many composi tions, chiefly produced at Paris, are very highly esteemed by experts. Money Well Spent. Health Is an important factor to the people of New York city and the pub lic treasury expends $6,300 each day in looking after it Playing With,* fidf & I RAYJIOM W.PULLMAtt <5TO/?y OFCN/SHOLM. TNFTHANF<SOTA TOWN THAT NIGHT HAVE BFFM 3AVFD RU/RtS OR CH/tSHOLM - r™ ■■ .. — . S:' I ' - it Wtw.- s OPEN. ** fjn===== -i THE FEW DWELL!HGS SEARED WERE 1| TEHHED'JHTO STORES »— - . -I vault or nmr national bam The people in the section around Chisholm, Minn., say that it is the driest year that they have ever known. The woods and the brush growth on cut-over land are as dry as tinder and j fires can be seen in as many as a half dozen places at one time, starting from what no one knows. The natives give various causes of how the flames start, the most popular of which are sparks from engines, hunters and i campers, careless brush-burning by homesteaders and incendiaries. One man even advanced the theory of I spontaneous combustion, and did nol 1 seem to like it when I told him that 1 __ Ruins of Chisholm Hotel—Getting Lines for New Building. thought this was hardly the case. In | many sections up here the ground is ! of peat bog formation and a spark may : burn for weeks after it finds a lodging ' before it is fanned into a flame. It is hard and practically impos sible to figure losses accurately at this time, and it will be weeks before even an approximate estimate that is final j can be made. Cruisers will have to be sent over the burnt-over areas be | fore close figures can be obtained and I the timber owners say that it is ab j solutely useless to do anything in this I line until a heavy rain comes and the end of the fires is assured. Putting the losses low, to be on the safe side, they are commonly agreed to be $5,000,000 to $10,000,000. The majority of people say about $5,000, 000. This is considered a conserva tive estimate by those who have been over most of the ground. At five per cent, interest the amount of capital lost would yield $250,000 a year. This is worth contrasting with what the state forestry board now has to spend for protection. It has an appropria tion of $11,500. The burning of the prosperous little town of Chisholm on the Mesabi iron range is the item of loss which figures most prominently in conversations with all who have anything to say about the forest fire destruction to date. The people in this country are have been saved. As it was. all that was spared by the flames were the two churches, the beautiful $11’5,000 high school, the grammar school, and two blocks of dwellings on opposite sides of town, which were saved because of a peculiar shifting of the wind. One of the fortunate things about the fire was that it struck Chisholm awake in the afternoon instead of at night after all were asleep. There was no loss of life as it was, but had the flames swept in in the dark the holocaust which would have resulted would have been most horrible, for there is no telling what part of the 5,000 people would have been cremat ed in their beds, so quick were the flames, or what would have happened to the fleeing, panic-stricken people and their children who might have been awake. Many of the people of the city were hard hit by the fire financially and Some lost practically all they had. The same dauntless spirit that im pelled large cities like Baltimore and San Francisco to arise from the ruins of fire and rebuild is in the people of little Chisholm and already there are about 50 new stores and dwellings nearly completed. When I saw the people going about their work in such a cheerful go-ahead way, I was sur prised, for one can hardly expect such quick action from a small town. Benedicts in High Place. Few Unmarried Men Rise to Promi nence in This Country. Is marriage good for statesmen? Dis raeli said no. but then “Dizzy" unbur dened himself of more than one foolish utterance. Certainly, in this country, the answer is yes. Almost all the men who have been at the head of affairs in national or state politics in the last two or three decades have been bene dicts. Most of the presidents since the war have not only wives but chil dren. President Roosevelt, of course, was the head of a large family when he entered the White House. Presi dent McKinley was married, though his children did not survive infancy. President Cleveland was a husband and father when he began his second term. He started his first term as a bachelor, but it did not take him long to learn the disadvantages of single life in Washington. President Harri son had not only a wife and children, but a grandchild. President Arthur was a widower, but his children lived in the White House with him. Presi dent Garfield was a family man. Pres ident Hayes was married. So was President Grant. President Johnson also had a wife. In fact, with the ex ception of the short time Grover Cleve land was in office before his marriage, only one president, James Buchanan, had been a bachelor. Four of the presidents—Tyler, Fillmore, Benjamin Harrison and Koosevelt—married twice. Had No Attraction for Author. Being once asked w'hether he had read any of the books of a popular novelist, Thackeray rejoined: “Well, no. You see, I am like a pastry cook. I bake tarts and I sell 'em; but I eat bread and butter.” Autos Forging to the Front. From one day's observation at five points of greatest vehicle congestion on Manhattan island it was learned that there are 63 horse-drawn and 37 ‘ power-drawn vehicles in each 100. used to fires, and hardly feel at home unless there is the smell of smoke in the air. Until the (lames menace a town or a very valuable stand of tim ber they are fairly indifferent to the danger. A striking evidence of this over con fident feeling of safety was given on the day of the Chisholm fire, the loss's in which are now conservatively esti mated at $1250,000 to $1,500,000, in- , eluding real property, stocks of mer chandise, and every other item 01 direct loss. The same fire that de stroyed the town had been burning in the forests near by for more than a week. It was at five o'clock in the afternoon that the fire entered the city in the clutch of a gale from the northwest and laid the place in ruins in less time than it takes to tell it. Up to within a half hour before the flames caught the town the people were confident that there was no dan ger. When the fire came all were panic stricken, and grabbing the few things nearest at hand, which in numerous i cases were not articles of the great | est usefulness, fled the town, many 1 making for the iron mines near by. Had ordinary precautions been taken ! even as late as the forenoon of the 1 fire, it is said that the place could PROLIFIC ENGLISH SOW; OFFSPRING 135 IN 4 YEARS Is There Any Sow in America That Can ILeat That Record? j — Our illustration shows an English sow with a wonderful history as a producer of bacon. She was born—so her owner informs me—about March. 19C4, and since then her records read as follows: March, 1935, litter of 13; September, 19C5. 17: February, 19C6. 16; August, 19C6, 17: February, 1907, 20; August, 19C7, 15; Fejruary, 1908, 22; August, 19C8, 15; total in tour years, 135. Teeth of Horse at Four Years i-—--——— At four years cld each jaw shows four permanent teeth, whose tables are worn to the same level. The dividers are worn upon both of their bor ders. Locked at from the side, the corner teeth are quite small. At four and a haif years the nippers show wear on both edges. The corner teeth and the hook or canine teeth are in evidence. STABLE AND CARRIAGE HOUSE Will F*rovide Roam lor Two Cows and Three Horses. The accompanying diagram shows ground plan for stable and carriage house 40x25 feel. The cows' stall for two is six feet wide, and the horse stalls are each five feet wide, which is the proper width. This will give you a carriage house 20x24 feet, and feed the stock from the front. A passage leads from the stable to carriage shingles: 22 studs for partitions and 1 stalls, 2x4—10 feet; 500 feet inch lin ing for stable: 670 feet plank for stalls, 2x10—S feet; 4 stall posts, 6x6 j —8 feet; 2 pieces stall caps, 2x8—8 feet; 3 ridge boards, 1x7—14 feet; 3 ridge boards, 1x6,—14 feet; 150 feet cornice. If foundation be built of con crete it should be at least 2 feet below surface, and if set on level, would re Groun d Plan. house, so a horse may be haruessed and hitched up and left inside till ready to go. The following is a bill of material: Four side sills 8x8—21 feet spliced; 4 cross sills, 8x8—25 feet; 39 floor joists, 2x10—14 feet; 21 ceiling joists, 2x8—25 feet; 2,000 feet plank, (inch measure) for floor; 1,000 feet inch lumber for loft; 6S studs, 2xG—13 feet; 10 plates, 2x6—14 feet; 12 scantlings, 2x4—12 feet, for gable studs; 1,900 feet rough siding; 42 rafters, 2x6—16 feet; 1,350 feet roof sheeting; 25 M. quire a wall of 3 feet at least. To build such a wall of concrete would re quire 9'/2 barrels cement, 3 yards stone fillers, and 11 yards gravel. It is admitted that dipping posts in hot ' coal tar will add to their durability. Money Well Spent.—A few extra dollars for a good pure-bred ram is money well spent. No flockmaster ' who takes pride in his flock and values its improvement can afford to save money by the purchase of a cheap grade ram. { Grass in the Poultry Ration.—Grass is one of the best foods that we can feed the bens. It is cheap because it is harvested by the poultry them selves. This save not only the cost yf havesting, but also the cost of taandling it. Grass contains much nu triment, all of the food elements be ing represented. Blue grass and clo ver are rich in protein, and they also i-arry a good proportion of carbon. These are the elements needed by the fowls in the producing of the ma terials for growth. The owner of —------- I poultry on the farm should make care ful provision for this kind of food. , especially when it can be fed in a green state. The increasing price of ! all grain feeds makes it necessary foi the farmer to turn to grass as a feed | ! to the largest possible extent. The Grade Cow.—The grade cow may be your salvation, but the grade ' bull, never. i Clean and Cold.—Keep the milk ( clear, and cold and you will keep it • pure. ! 'HREE WEEKS. DiOunfa. tbout a Remarkable Change. Mrs. A. J. Davis of Murray, Ky., says: “When I began using Doans Kidney Pills, kid ney disease was slowly poisoning me. Dizzy spells almost made me fall, sharp pains like knife thrusts would catch me in the back, and « „ „ 1 1 . , ntlnnlr f grip left me with a constant agoniz ing backache. Doan's Kidney Pills helped me quickly and in three weeks’ time there was not a symptom of kidney trouble remaining." Sold by all dealers. 50 cents a box. Foster-Alilburn Co., Buffalo, N. Y. SICK MAN WANTED CHANGE. More Than Willing to Make Transfer with Physician. A Syracuse business man who, be sides being extremely active and am bitious. has much sense of humor, was taken sick with a slight attack of pneumonia. His physician, aware that It would be a task to keep his high strung patient in bed, sought to im press on him the seriousness of the ailment and the necessity of absolute rest; all of which the sick man lis tened to in a bored manner. Never theless he consented to obey the doc tor. But this enforced inactivity rankled In him; and each succeeding day found the patient importuning the medical man attendant to allow him to get out to business. Then, dis gusted, he would lie back to cast im precations at the inexorable physi cian. I One morning the physician, after having been up all night on an im portant case, appeared at his patient's house at the usual hour. He had hard ly stuck his haggard face inside the door, however, before the man in the bed gave him a quick glance and sat^ up. “Eh? ejaculated the patient. Then rhovixig out his hand to grasp the doc tor's satchel, he added: "Doc, I guess you'd better get into bed here and let me go out with the medicine bag.” A PROGRESSIVE. /* - “Madame, dot girl of yours make ;reat progress mit her moosic. Before she was always two or dree notes be 3int me, and now she is always two or dree notes ahead.” The Bride’s Look. A girl about to be married worries so much she begins to look like an >ld married woman. In addition to worrying about her clothes and coax ng her folks to give her a new outfit, she sits up too late with her young aian, and the result is an anxious, :a reworn look a week before the wedding that cannot be told from the look on the face of a woman who has been married a year or two. Look at the next girl you meet who is soon to bo married, and you will remark 'h:r she has “aged rapidly.”—Atchison Globe. A Discomfiting Witness. The following colloquy took place between Councilor Sealingwax and a witness who “would talk back:” “You say, sir, the prisoner is a thief?” "Yes, sir. ’Cause why, she has fon fessed she was.” “And you also swear she worked for you after this con fession?” “Yes, sir.” “Then we are to understand that you employ dis honest people to work for you, even after their rascalities are known?” "Of course. How else would I get as sistance from a lawyer?”—Argonaut. “The Law.” Parents of Wayne, a suburb of Phil adelphia, are required to report promptly any case of contagious dis ease, in compliance with the regula tions of the local board of health. In accordance with this order, Health Officer Leary received this post card recently: “Dear Sir: This Is to notify you that my boy Ephraim is down bad with the measles as required by the new law.”—Harper’s Weekly. NOT A MIRACLE. Just Plain Cause and Effect. There are Some quite remarkable things happening every day, which seem almost miraculous. Some persons would not believe that a man could suffer from coffee drink ing so severely as to cause spells of unconsciousness. And to find complete relief in changing from coffee to Pos tum is well worth recording. 1 used to be a great coffee drinker so much so that it was killing me by inches. My heart became so weak I would fall and lie unconscious for an hour at a time. The spells caught me sometimes two or three times a day. “My friends, and even the doctor, • told me it was drinking coffee that caused the trouble. I would not be heve it, and still drank coffee until I could not leave my room. • Then my doctor, who drinks Pos tum himself, persuaded me to stop cof fee and try Postum. After much hesi tation I concluded to try it. That was eight months ago. Since then I have had but few of those spells, none for more than four months. “I feel better, sleep better and am better every way. I now drink noth mg but Postum and touch no coffee and as I am seventy years of age all mv friends think the improvement Quite remarkable.” 1 “There’s a Reason.” "recTlff'iTo by Postum Co., Battle “ pU RM '» Ever read tne above letter? A new one appears from time to time. They *nterest.UIne’ trUe’ a"d fU" of human