PAT'S MiND WAS LOGICAL,
Quick to See One Strong Point as to
Victim’s Identity.
Previously to entering the railroad
yards an able-bodied loafer picked up
a small, glittering object from the
sidewalk and, without examining it
very closely, pinned it to his coat,
says the Philadelphia Ledger. Three
minutes later he collided with a slow
ly moving freight train, was hurled
against a post and picked up insensi
ble The train dispatcher, notified by
telephone, called up Patrick Doyle,
the yardmaster's assistant, and said:
^ ou d better search his pockets.
Doyle. Find out who lie is. notify his
friends and report to me:”
A few moments later the report
came:
"There's not a line of writing on
him." said Patrick, "hut we've identi
fied him j>y the badge on his coat. He
is a Lady Maccabee.”
*
How I Cured Sweeny and Fistula.
"I want to tell you how 1 sared one
■of our horses that had a fistula We
had the horse doctor out and he said
it was so had that he did not think he
could cure it. and did not come again.
Then we tried Sloan's Liniment and
it cured it up nicely.
"One day last spring I was plowing
for a neighbor who had a horse with
sweeny, and 1 told him about Sloan's
Liniment and he had me get a bottle
for him. and it cured his horse all
right, and he goes off now like a colt.
"We had a horse that had sweeny
awfully bad and we thought it was
never going to be any good, but we
used Sloan's Liniment and it cured it
up nicely. I told another neighbor
about it and he said it was the best
Liniment he ever used.
"We are using Sloan's Sure Colic
Cure and we think it is all right.”
A. D. Bruce, Aurelia, la.
HOW HE SHOT THEM.
*
*
Made Little Difference to Sportsman
Where His Birds Were Hit.
“Down in Florida, where I spend
the greater part of the winter,” said
the sunburned New Yorker, "they are
not so particular about observing the
game laws and the little niceties of
hunting as we are up north. I had
frequently seen water fowl shot with
out giving them a chance to rise. Com
ing up to Jacksonville a big German
got on the train at Port Orange with a
nice string of duck. He sat next me
in the smoker and I struck up a con
versation with him.
“ Nice lot of ducks you have there,’
I said.
"Yah,' he replied.
“‘Where did you get them?'I asked.
‘“Down py de inlet up de creeks,'
be said.
" I suppose you shot them on the
wing.' I ventured, remembering the
trick of the pot hunters.
' ’Yah.’ he replied solemnly, on de
ving. und in de feet, und in de head,
eferywhere. Dere dev are. Y’ou can
examine deru und see for yourself.' ”
Willing to Oblige.
The poor but nervy young man was
after the hand of the heiress.
“Young man." roared her irate fa
ther, “never darken my door again."
“All right, sir.” replied the suitor,
blandly, ' I'll come around to-morrow
and give it a coat of bright red paint.
That will be much better than dark
ening it."
And the next instant the poor but
' nervy young man was being chased
: by a Scotch coachman, a French
'chauffeur and an English bulldog.
New Dinner Card idea.
H From Paris comes a decorated card
l:rack with a trail of artificial flowers
Spthat may be changed to suit the din
ner c-oiors and makes a pretty addi
tion to the table. These racks are to
ibold a plain card upon which the
gr. -st s name is written and they may
be used for a good many dinners, thus
obviating the expense of tbe decorated
dinner card every time one enter
tains.
Perversion of Type.
The Sunday school teacher was en
tertaining her class with what she
m had fondly planned to be a “social
/ C. evening.'' To her disappointment she
i|s found that all spontaneity had been
| left at home with the boys' everyday
clothes. and conversation dragged
mM. hopelessly until her bull terrier came
P into the room. He sniffed about from
one sby band of welcome to another,
S when suddenly a boyish voice, grufT
* with embarrassment, burst forth: "I
had a bull pup like that oncet, but he
£ growed up into a bloodhound."
'
BUILJ RIGHT.
. Brain and Nerves Restored by Grape
jfe Nuts Food.
The nutcber of persons whose ail
ments were such that no other food
could be retained at all, is large and
reports are on the increase.
“For 12 years 1 suffered from dys
pepsia. finding no food that did not
^.distress me." writes a Wis. lady. “I
was reduced from 145 to 90 lbs., grad
ually growing weaker until 1 could
leave my bed only a short while at a
time, and became unable to speak
aloud.
“Three years ago I was attracted by
an article on Grape-Nuts and decided
to try it.
“My stomach was so weak I could
not take cream, but I used Grape-Nuts
with milk and lime water. It helped
me from the first, building up my sys
tem in a manner most astonishing to
the friends who had thought my re
covery impossible.
“Soon I was able to take Grape
Nuts and cream for breakfast, and
lunch at night, with an egg and Grape
Nuts for dinner.
“I am now able to eat fruit, meat
and nearly all vegetables for dinner,
but fondiy continue Grape-Nuts lor
breakfast and supper.
“At the time of beginning Grape
Nuts I could scarcely speak a sen
tence without changing words around
Aor 'talking crooked' in some way, but
my brain and nerves have become so
strengthened that I no longer have
that .rouble.” “There’s a Reason.”
Name given by Postum Co.. Battle
Creek, Mich. Cead "The Road to Well- ,
Pkg?.
^ A'r
-* / ' I
•r<®7'VrVr l\\ 'V''\
JZzzwz&JTJQ/rs ^BtXzzziJ&vr
SYNOPSIS.
The story opens during: a trip of the
“Overland Mad" through the ltocky
mountains, while effi.riv • are being mad'
to build up the reunify “Gm-le Hilly"
Dodge, stage driver, Alfred Yineent, a
young man. and Phineus t'adtvailader. in
trodueed. They rome aeross the re
mains of u massaere. Hater at Anthony's
station, they find the redskins have rar
rie.l their destruetive work titer - also.
Stella Anthony, daughter of Anthony,
keeper of station, is Introduced. Tie trav
elers find rfi.it Anthony 1 as been kill 1.
Vincent witit letter of introduction to
Gov. Stanford is assigned his work, in
unearthing plans of enemies of railroad,
being built.
CHAPTER III.—Continued.
"Your first business will be to learn
more of the railroad. I'll ask our sec
retary. Mr. Miller, to let you have im
mediate access to the records. You'd
better take a run over the road. That
will speak louder in a day than any
other record could in a year. As
soon as possible you'll go to San
Francisco, get in touch with the Mc
Lane crowd, McCoppin and our other
enemies there and learn what you can
of their plans against us." He glanced
at. the superintendent. "How can we
wedge him in there the quickest,
Crocker? It wont do for me to in
troduce him”
i can nx luai. me situations
right in my hand, and no smack of
railroad in it, either, i'll send him to
Harmon. No one knows that he's to
work for us as soon as his term on
the bench expires. Mrs. Harmon's
the queen bee in society down there.
She'll land the young man where we
want him. first fling.”
"Good enough. But we can't allow
you much time in Sun Francisco. Vin
cent. You must work fast, mow as
wide a swath as you need—don't mind
the dollars, be the Boston aristocrat
—and get through in time to cut in at
Carson City. There's legislation
pending in the ‘third house' of that
baby legislature over there that we
need to know about."
Some further instructions ensued
and the conference ended. And Alfred
was soon engrossed in minutes of di
rectors' meetings, supreme court de
cisions, newspaper reports and com
ments. state and national legislation—
everything that would aid in malting
him master of the history of the road.
He worked fast and thoroughly, in
spired anew with enthusiasm for the
great business to which he had prom
ised allegiance.
Back of his ardor lay another spur,
desire to see Stella. She was there,
where he shortly would be, at the
"front.” She had written him of her
safe arrival, of Jake Bennett's kind
protection, of Mrs. Bennett’s loving
care and the invitation to remain with
them.
CHAPTER IV.
The Whip of the Blast.
Deep in a small gulch, the red earth
bleeding through its torn mantle,
crouched a raw little railroad town.
Cabins, tents, huts, lean-tos propped
against trees, scraps of shops, false
fronted stores and "ginmilis” huddled
new and paintless between the clasp
ing hills.
It was an hour before noon when a
slender little engine, with spidery
wheels and huge, overtopping smoke
stack, puffed into the rude shed that
was hung up on the mountain side
above the town and called by courtesy
a depot.
A man paced the boards nervously,
impatient at the sacrifice of time re
quired to meet so indefinite a person
age as a telegram-introduced "young
man in our employ who wishes to see
your work.” The restless man was
George Gregory, superintendent of con
struction, the human engine that exe
cuted the commands of the officers at
Sacramento. Alfred presented a letter
from the governor, a magic bit of pa
per that arrested even George Greg
ory's lurid thoughts at the sight of
this “dandified ballroom cublet."
The atmosphere was decidedly clear
er when the superintendent looked up
from the letter. “When will you be
ready to go over the grading. Mr. Vin
cent? I'll have your horse sent any
time you say after dinner."
"After dinner, sir? The train leaves
at two o'clock, doesn't it?”
“Vps’ Imr viin'll nnt frr» hark Tn-rlav
will you?”
“Can't I get to the Front and back
by two?"
“No, not to the Front: yet you can
see nearly all of the completed grade
if you start at once. Yo'll miss your
dinner, though.”
“1 don't wish to incommode you. sir.
Could not some other person conduct
me? Dinner is unimportant. I must
return to-day if possible."
A shade of approbation crept into
the superintendent's keen glance.
“Very well, Mr. Vincent. I'll have
your horse in ten minutes. You ride?
Our stock is cantankerous at times.'
“I ride a iittle: if not well enough.
I’ll have to walk.”
“Plucky:” thought the older man. as
he dispatched a messenger for Alfred's
horse and employed the wait in send
ing telegrams to the Sacramento office.
Meantime Allred wrote a short note
to Stella explaining his haste and tell
ing her that he would be at the hotel
for a moment before he left iu the
afternoon, if possible. He had slipped
the note with a coin into the stable
boy's hand and was in the saddle when
the superintendent came out of the hot
little box that did duty as a telegraph
office, and the two were quickly out
on the grade.
“So this is the railroad Mr. McLane
claims is standing on end and leading
up to heaven instead of across the
Sierras over Judah's route?” Alfred
stopped his horse and looked back
through the deep cut. across the deep
er ravine where the bridge-builders
were at work "That spider web looks
wickedly frail," he added.
"It's strong enough to hold our fly
till we meet our time limit. Plenty of
time for stiffening up and filling in
afterward.”
The horses’ hoofbeats were now
ringing clear on bare granite. "Where
do you get earth for your fills? The
trees here don't seem to have root
hold against a summer zephyr.”
"That’s one of my small troubles.
Sometimes we have to go half a mile
afield for soil. And carts—they can't
make 'em fast enough. I've got 2,500
men and ">00 carts: but we'll have to
double that at once if we make our
50 miles on time. And where under
the canopy the men are to come from
I can t see. Talk of bricks without
straw: Pharaoh's job was easy com
pared to miue.”
They had pushed on as far as the
finished grading and were returning.
From the story of the pierced moun
tains and from George Gregory Alfred
had proved Gov. Stanford's prediction
about the "record of the road." It had
told him more than words or pages of
written details.
Gregory looked at his watch and up
and down the line of the grading
sharply. The noon hour had almost
“There's a Little Gal Over Hy;
passed. “I guess you can find your
way back alone. I'm needed here.”
“Aren't you going back—going
somewhere for dinner. Mr. Gregory?"
"No. 1 guess my stomach's as fast
proof as yours." Already his alert
eye was elsewhere, and Alfred knew
himself dismissed.
The superintendent snapped to his
watch cover, regardless of the spring.
"Blast that Simms! His gang s the last
on duty again !■ Good-bye. Mr. Vincent.
Come and look us over again." he
called, and dashed off toward the of
fending foreman. As Alfred passed j
on the trail below the superintendent's i
far-audible ire followed him. a unique |
word panorama, expressible only in j
dashes and stars.
Muscle-sore, Alfred alighted from his
steaming bronco at the depot only five
j minutes before two. No time for Stel
la unless he stayed over night. Should
he do it" Indeed, ought he not to re
main to see with his own eyes how
she was circumstanced in this rough
town" lie remembered his promise to
Uncle Billy. Mr. Crocker himself had
said Alfred could not get comfortably
to the "Front" and back in a day. His
answer to Mr. Crocker flashed back on
his brain: "No man s comfort should
count against railroad business." Thai
decided him. To stay meant one day
later in San Francisco, one day less
to study a situation where any hour
might be the hour of fate for the Cen
tra) Pacific railroad.
The fussy little engine was now
facing west, waiting its message from
the lever. The signal sounded and the
train was starting when a barefooted
1 boy came blowing round the rear car
carrying a small package and in
formed the conductor breathlessly that
it was for "that dandy feller that went
off this morning with the boss."
"Here!” cried Alfred, reaching down j
as the boy ran alongside. Alfred j
caught the parcel and threw a coin to
the bearer.
The train labored slowly up the
grade and around the hill while Al
fred untied his package. It was a
neat luncheon: and wrapped *n the
folded napkin was a spray of wild for
get-me-not. From Stella! Impulsively
he lifted the blossom to his face, and
in the action caught the flutter of a
ih, Bill Anthony’s Daughter—”
Yet the boy grinned. It was glad pro
fanity.
"Do yon know what's in this. Al?”
"Yes. sir; I couldn’t help it."
“How’s that?”
“I’ve learned the telegraph since
I've been messenger.”
"The dickens you say! What's your
speed?”
"1 get most of the press dispatches,
sir."
"How about sending?"
"Not so good, sir; but I'll soon catch
up if—" He stopped abruptly.
"If what?”
"I d rather not say, sir."
"On account of the operator?"
“He's an O. K. friend to me, sir.”
"H'm!" The superintendent mounted
and was in full gaiiop toward the sta
tion before he was quite sealed. "I
shan't forget you. boy," he called back
over his shoulder.
DEALING WITH
Grave Problem That Has Ever Been
Before Society.
It is a novel idea that any man over
30 years of age who commits a crime
may be set down, as a rule, to be mor'
ally bad. with no hopes of improve
ment. Morality, according to Dr.
Belfield, who advances the theorv
is the arrest of the instincts by the
intellect, says the Chicago Journal.
A child is a savage. If he continues
to improve slowly he has a chance
to outgrow his tendencies before he
is 30. If he does not do so. then *<e
is hopeless, and Dr. Belfield thinks
he should either be imprisoned for
life or else put out of the worlu alto
gether.
Civilization growing more and more
averse to capital punishment, will
never consent to the cemetery outlet
thus suggested. But permanent seg
regation in a penal colony would be
equally effective. We do not go so J
far as Dr. Belfield as to believe that a !
man over 30 who commits a crime 1
woman's gown high on a hill that over
topped the track. There stood Stella,
a granite boulder for her lookout, be
hind her a shining laurel. Her hat
hung by its ribbons, her cheeks were
glowing from her hurried climb, and
the wind fluttered her full skirts and
tossed her shining hair. She waved
her handkerchief as the train passed.
CHAPTER V.
The Coming of Uncle Billy.
Down the rain-soaked street of the
railroad village hastened an alert
youth carrying a yellow paper. Where
all was hurry, one flying figure more
or less would not have been noticed:
but this one carried a crutch; one foot
was turned backward and hung high
above the ground. Yet one forgot to
be sorry for the cripple, so quick was
he. so shining with gopd nature. Every
one called him “boy," though he
was 20.
“Hello, All What's yo' hurry?"
asked a bystander. “You can do mo’
with a stick an' a foot than most folks
with two good laigs."
"Aw, spare my blushes, Mr. Hen
nett! Say. is the old man in the
hotel?"
“Yes. Can't yo' let him swalleh his
dinneh in peace? He don't need but
five minutes: an' it ain't often he gits
a lick a: Sally R.'s chicken fixin's. He
wouldn't to-day if that thar ornery
train wa n t two hours late."
"Well, this dispatch ’ll help his di
gestion."
i uuugm >o an want lowed to
read the yalleh lightnin'.”
“I didn't read it. And—I ain't giving
it away. Sabe?”
The boy barely halted and was at
; the dining room door when Gregory
came out.
' What's the racket. Al?" he said. “A
message for me?’’ He spoke a little
I thickly, his mouth full of a fast dis
appearing apple.
The message was brief; and his
comment was an explosion of oaths.
.Take Bennett and Alvin Carter
walked to the station together. They
arrived at the station just as the train
pulled in.
The first passenger through the car
door was Uncle Billy.
“Why, durn my eyes! What 're yo'
all doin' hyah. Bill Dodge?" asked Ben
nett as I'ncle Billy stepped to the
platform.
The two shook hands, but Bennett
turned away with a hurried word and
disappeared within the station.
Uncle Billy gazed blankly toward
the office, his face clouding with a d;s
Alfred Stopped His Horse and Looked
Back Through the Deep Cut.
appointment that did not lift while he
attended to his scant baggage.
The superintendent came out short
ly, giving hasty orders to Bennett as
the two walked toward the big roan
known as the "Boss' Lightning
Striker." They passed Uncle Billy;
but Bennett's face was a mask till the
roan clattered out of sight, when he
turned back, another soul looking
from his eyes.
"How air vo' pegs fo' walkin', you
ole bronco buster?" Bennett questioned
in a hearty voice, slapping his heavy
hand on Uncle Billy's shoulder.
They set off briskly and in single
file up the steep cur-off that made in
one mile the eievation of five miles of
grading.
"What kin 1 do for vo‘ all. you rotary
eyed ole coon?" Bennett asked with
another bear cuff as they came
abreast.
"1 want a job on Charley Crockeh's
Dutch Flat stage line. Can I get it?"
"You bet yo' bottom dollahl They
need men like you. Just chuck vo’
application to Crockeh. anti—no. Go
right to Spalding; he's boss of the
company's new stage line. But what’s
yo' all’s grouch agin the old man?"
"Haven't any in particuiah. There’s
a little gal oveh hyah. Bill Anthony’s
daughter—”
“Shore. We tuck her in fur vo'
sake; kep' her fo' her own. The ole
woman's dead stuck on her; wanted
her to stay right along, but she
wouldn't.”
"That's her. all right. You remem
ber Bill Anthony?”
“Reckon I do. He's that gold-plated
ole cuss tnat built a sort o suburb to
the Golden City over mar in Washoe,
ain't he?"
"Same. But the Injuns got him; an'
the girl has no relations that she
knows of; so I sent her oveh hyah to
you. I want to be noah her. and-—”
Bennett's nudge sent Uncle Billy off
the trail. "You ole Mormon! Ain't
thinkin' o' ma-ryin' her yo'self, are
ye?”
“Well, by jiminy! I'm not that kind
of a sardine. She's 18. maybe, and I'm
squinting at my fiftieth birthday. If
I'd had a daughteh, an' she was like
Stelia Anthony, the prince o' Wales
wouldn't be good enough for her. See
where I'm driving?"
They came suddenly to the pick
torn engine path where Bennett's
gang were spiking the "chairs" over
the flanges of the rails to the ties.
Instantly banter and familiarity van
ished. and Jake Bennett became the
quiet, lynx-eyed overseer. They had
surprised the men working wTell under
the temporary foreman; yet Uncle
Billy saw a sweep of fresh energy
speed down the line, as the under man
i took up his hammer and Bennett
i swiftly examined the work done in his
| absence. He spoke scarcely a word,
j but his "straight" eye saw every poor
, joint, each badly set "chair," and his
own hands often assisted in the read
justing.
When he returned to the end of the
section where Uncle Billy was waiting
he said. The boss has powerful good
news to-day. That dispatch was a
copy of one the governor got from
Huntington at Washington. The rail
road bili's passed, an' the C. P. com
pany's got anotheh yeah on the fust
50 miles an' right smart mo' land be
sides."
(TO BE CONTINUED.)
THE CRIMINAL
is therefore necessarily a moral idiot.
One experience of punishment has
been enough for many men past that
age.
But when a man is undeterred by ,
punishment and goes on committing |
one crime after another, then we
think society owes it to itself to take i
stern measures. Such a man should j
be adjudged a habitual and irre- j
claimable criminal, and removed from j
society. But, on the other hand, hon- I
est men should not be burdened with j
the cost of supporting him. He should
be forced to earn his own living.
Far From It.
Former Resident —How things have
changed here in 20 years'. 1 wouldn't
know tiie town Wh. ' . is become of
Floogus, wk 1 *■> notes and
lend money a■ tw e. ti a month?
Hotel Clerk—1> gone to his re
ward.
Former Resident—What! Is he
dead ?
Hotel Clerk—Dead? Not or. your
life! He’s president of a trust com
pa v in New York.
I’m Coming Home.
Oli. breath of June from the woodland,
Oh. scent of the stream and fields.
Oh. droning winds that are whisp ring
Of peace that the country yields—
I'm coining home:
Oh. lilies floating in bayous, I
Oh, islands of rustling reed.
Oh, willows bending above them.
Oh, daisies of fragrant mead—
I'm coming home!
Oh, fields that wave like the ocean,
Oh, billows that ebb and flow.
Oil. groves that shelter the birdlings.
Oh. banks where the sunsets glow—
I’m coming home!
Oli, maiden, fair as the flowers.
With eyes that arc soft and blue.
Await to-night by the arbor.
A-tryst for your lover true—
I'm coming home!
Mumble-the-Peg.
An illustration entitled ' Pulling the
Peg " brings recollections. The man
who would not smile broadly at the
picture is "fit for strategies and such "
The illustration shows a number of
boys on a grassy plot, all down on
their haunches, their knees or their
stomachs, intensely interested in ob
serving an unlucky comrade pulling
the wooden peg from the ground with
his teeth.
☆ * ☆
It is an old game, as old as the
Pyramids of Egypt and as honored
among boys as Sunday school. It is
the subsequent farce that follows a
game of "mumble-the-peg.” The most
indifferent player must pull the wood
en stick from the soil. The length and
size of the peg is regulated by very
strict and well known rules. Being
prepared the peg is set in the grassy
earth and each boy may take a whack
at it with the back of his knife, hold
ing the blade as a handle, until the
peg is driven down. down, no matter
how deep, provided there is still anoth
er whack due the last boy.
☆ * *
Then the fun begins! Down on his
knees with his nose in the grass goes
the unlucky lad. like a gopher digging
a hole in the meadow. The fortunate
boys "ki-yi” and hoot, laugh and shout
uproariously as the face of the dig
ger comes up covered with dirt, his
mouth full of soil and lips sputtering
to dispel the gravel. Down he goes
again, amid the plaudits of his fel
lows. His nose is almost flat so hard
is he pressing the earth after the peg.
After spitting out several mouthfuls
of Mother Earth, he can reach the peg
with his teeth. He takes a strong
grip on the wood and pulls. Either the
peg comes up or his teeth break off!
Usually he gets the peg. To miss
getting it would be to stand the taunts
of his playmates for days! In after
life when he goes after big projects
he remembers the tenacity of purpose
cultivated with "mumble-the peg." and
he wins.
☆ ☆ ☆
Hence the playful game of youth is
not without its lesson. It may be
untidy, but men do worse things for
money or for power, when the peg
is deep, than rub a little dirt on their
physiognomies—they rub it on their
hearts and their consciences and cover
over their sympathies with plating:
ail of which is worse than the smear
ing of a little soil on the face in an
innocent game of "pulling the peg."
Trouble.
i When father digs th' mow-machine
Fr'm out th' hay-mow chaff.
An' goes an’ gits the oiler can.
While ma she kinder !afs.
T know that trouble has begun.
An’ I gist gTah my bait an' run!
When mother goes out In th' yard
An’ measures with a stick,
I Then gits th' little pack of seeds
An' plans to sow them thick,
I know that trouble has begun.
An' I gist grab my bait an' run.
Say! spring would be gist twic't as nice
Without house cleanin’ time
An' things to tote outside an’ in
An’ cellar steps to climb!
I know then trouble has begun
An' I gist grab my bait an’ run.
If spring would come wiih only spring.
An' nothin’ else in sight
But suckers in th' old mill race
That flop around an' bite—
There wouldn't be a thing but fun
When I grab up my bait an- run!
®-®-®
Thieves.
Once upon a time a man stole a
hot stove—and the people marveled.
He completely overshadowed the man
who stole the acorns from the blind
mamma-pig. Now comes a man who
steals a wagonlnad of unwrapped lim
burger from a cheese factory in Utica.
The man is in jail. He should be giv
en a life sentence. A man who will
steal a wagonload of smell like that,
cannot he trusted. He might filch a
snap factory or a political caucus. One
never could tell what this man would
do in a pinch. Once liberated he
might purloin a royal scandal or a
glue plant. Keep him tinder lock and
key until after wash day, anyhow!
A Pair
“An Ohio hen cliews tobacco." says an
exchange. Chewing tobacco ought to tie
confined to all animals that can not
spit ... A Massachusetts hen laid
an egg with a quarter in it. We have al
ways heard that there Is money in hens.
—Logan (0.1 Republican.
Help!
A person can get a good drink at the
drug store nearly any time now. as the
doctor has had a new well drilled.—Bur
lington (Colo. I Republican.
An Art Critic.
“This art craze is going too far.”
said Blunt, when a pot of paint fell
from a second-storv window and
struck him on the head. "No more
decorated tiles for me," he mournfully
added, as he began to scrape the yel
low paint oft his silk hat with a knife.
The Ills We Are Heir To.
There are three modes of bearing
the ills of life—by indifference, which
Is the most common; by philosophy,
which is the most ostentatious, and by
religion, which is t e most effectual. *
WOMEN’S KIDNEYS.
Arc the Source of Most of Women's
Sickness.
Mrs. Rebecca Mock, 1793 E Rich
Street. Columbus, Ohio, writes: “I be
lieve 1 would sun tM
a victim of kidney
troubles but for
Doan's Kdiney Pills,
for when I started
using them I was in
constant pain with
mv back, and r.o
nthpr rpmodv K.rl
been of any use. The kidney secre
tions were irregular, and 1 was nerv
ous and lacked energy, nut Doan'
Kidney Fills gave me prompt relief
and continued use cured me "
Sold by all dealers. 50 cents a box.
Foster-Milburn Co., Buffai , N Y.
Par.ts for the Orphans.
There is a praiseworthy cu \ m ’n
some families of sending all ’he
‘'pants1' that the bcvs have gone
through wholly or in part, to the asy
lum for orphans, and, as the orphans
never mind a hole more or less, th^y
are glad to get tne garments. In one
of these families a few days aeo oc
curred a little incident hearing on this
laudable custom. Fred was engaged
in that extremely fascinating hut
rather dangerous, sport of sliding
down the banisters.
“What are you doing there. Fred ?“
asked mamma.
“Making pants for the ptxtr lit-ilo
orphans." answered Fred.
Easy Victory for Pat.
An Englishman, an Irishman and a
Scotchman were one day arguing as
to which of the three countries pos
sessed the fastest trains. ,
Said the Englishman. “Well. I've
been in one of our trains and the tele
graph poles have been like a hedge.”
"I've seen the milestones appear
like tombstones,” said the Scot.
"Be jabers." said Pat. "I was one
day in a train in my country and we
passed a field of carrots, a field of
turnips, a field of parsley, one of
onions and then a pond of water, and
we were going so fast that I though:
I it was broth!”
BABY’S ITCHING HUMOR.
Nothing Would Help Him—Mother Al
most in Despair—Owes Quick
Cure to Cuticura.
“Several months ago. my little boy
began to break out with itching sores.
I doctored him. but as soon as I got
them healed up in one place they
would break out in another. I was
almost in despair. I could not get
anything that would help him. Then
I began to use Cuticura Soap and Cuti
cura Ointment, and after using them
• three times, the sores commenced to
heal. He is now well, and not a scar
is left on his body They have never
returned nor left him with bad blood,
as one would think. Cuticura Reme
i dies are the best I have ever tried.
and I shall highly recommend them to
i any one who is suffering likewise.
Mrs. William Geeding. 102 Washing
ton St., Attica, lad., July 22, 1907.”
A Dreadful Secret.
Wife—Have you any secrets you
keep from me, dearest?
Husband—Ncne, darling.
Wife—Then I am determined I will
have none from you. either.
Husband—Have you secrets, then”
Wife—Only one. and 1 am resolved
to make a clean breast of it.
Husband (hoarsely)—Go on'
Wife—For several days 1 have had
a secret—a secret longing for a n*-w
dress, wi;h bat to match, for my birth
day.
That fetched him.—Tatler.
HOW TO TEST LINSEED OIL
There is nothing that will make
paint go wrong on the house mo~e
quickly than poor oil. It is as bad in
its way as adulterations in the white
lead. Petroleum oil cheapeners may
be detected by placing a drop of th'* oil
on a black painted surface. If one sees
the characteristic Iridescence or play
of colors which kerosene exhibits, it
is evidence of adulteration. Corn and
fish oil can be detected by the smell.
Adulteration in white lead can best
be discovered by the use of a blow
pipe. which National Lead Company
will send with instructions free to
anyone interested in paint. Address.
National Lead Company, Woodbridge
Building. New York.
After you know some people »vl
you are apt to regret the politeness
you wasted on them.
Garfield Tea is a natural laxative—it reg
ulates the digestion, purities the blood,
cleanses the system, cleurs the complexion,
brightens the eyes and brings the gl av of
splendid Health!
Some men are so afraid of doing
wrong that they don't do anything
It’s Pettit's Eye Salve,
that gives instant relief to eyes, irritated
from dust, heat, sun or wind. 25c. All drug
gists or Howard Bros., Buffalo, 2s. V.
Hugging by another came would be
squeezing, just the same.
You always get full value in lewis’
Pingl • Binder s'raight 5c cigar. Vuur
dealer or Lewis' Factory, Peoria, 111.
Character is what you are; reputa
tion is what people think you are.
tin. Wlnalow’s Soothing Syrup.
For children teething, softens the gurus, reduces to
damtnstloa, allays pain, cures wind colic. 25c a UotUe.
The reward of one duty done Is the
power to fulfill another.—George Eliot.
