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About The Loup City northwestern. (Loup City, Neb.) 189?-1917 | View Entire Issue (Oct. 17, 1907)
LSHe tbt Her® lijeof "JAraibI= Bloomington, 111.—Scheherazade has been outdone by Capt. Lewis E. Ijams, •<t Illinois. The Arabian Nights are In laager of being outclassed in history, henceforth, by the Bloomington- Days. Tbe resiiectlve ancient and modern instances of the two great story-tellers run parallel, to a certain extent; but the American army veteran’s continu ous performance was inspired seem ingly by a more sordid motive than (hat of the bride of the sulton of India, and had a different, though perhaps equally happy ending. Scheherazade told her royal spouse 1,101 stories in as many nights, in or der to divert him from his disagree able habit of putting to death each I morning his new bride of the day be- j lore. Ijaais spun the same number of cheerful yarns to Abram Brokaw. a millionaire plowmaker 85 years old, presumably with the object of prolong ing the iatter's life. But when the aged man finally succumbed at the one hundred and first side-splitter, and it transpired that he had been so well entertained that he had clean for- j gotten In mention the said Ijams in j his will or to compensate him in any substantial way for the humorous ! treatment so untiringly administered, j then the captain felt right mad, and up and sued the estate for $10,000— that is to say. for 1,000 prime, hand made jokes, at ten dollars per. The extra one hundred and one Joe Mil lerisai was thrown ill gratis for good measure. He didn’t get quite the. ten thou- : sand—but that’s another story, which ; is worth telling in some detail, to- \ gether with its romantic sequel, as to how, Capt. fjams won a bride, through (•laying a losing game of strategy against Cupid. How a Fortune Was Made. Abram Brokaw *had settled ia Bloomington away back in the forties: when the site of the present city was nothing but a blooming prairie, ac C4PZZOWS ZJ47ZS cording to a New York World corre spondent. He bought up land for al most nothing and lent small sums of money on likely looking farms, then foreclosed the mortgages. He also manufactured and sold nlows, which no farmer, rich or [>oor. could do with out. These enterprises, combined by the time he was old enough to have no particular use for money, so he grad ually became a miser. Like some other millionaires of our time, old man Brokaw cultivated a sense of humor and loved the society of a cheerful liar—especially when, like salvation, it was free. He found a congenial affinity, in the funny sense, in the person of his neigh bor, Capt. Lewis E. Ijams, who had a civil war record, a small pension and a reputation as the local Mark Tapley. Lewis was possessed of a prodigious memory, a fertile imagination and a vast collection of antiques in the line of jocose anecdotes of the vintage of 1840 and backward. He could draw STRENGTH OF ALUMINUM. A Question Frequently Asked by Workers in Metal. Metal workers frequently ask: What is the strength of aluminum? The ten sile. crushing and transverse strength of aluminum varies considerably with different conditions of hardness, due to cold weather: also to the amount of work that has been put upon the metal and character of the section, and the amount Of hardening Ingredients. Cast aluminum is about equal in strength to cast iron In tension, while under compression it is comparatively ____ 1 we&k- Taking the metal 99 per cent, pare, the ultimate tensile strength per isquare Inch in castings is 18,600 pounds; in sheet, 24,000 to 40,000; wire, 30,000 to 65,000 pounds, and bars, 128,000 to 40,000 pounds. As compared wUli copper, the average tensile - sttength of which' per square inch Is authoritatively stated to *e as fol tows: Cast, 18,000 pounds; sheet, 30, 008; molts, 36,000, and wire, 16,500, pore aluminum compares with copper upon this inexhaustible store In lots to suit any listener and keep it up in definitely. He never had to repeat himself—or. if he did, he never told tlie same story twice in the same way. Abram Brokaw loved to have Capt. Ijams drop in with a budget of button busters, and he was such a good lis tener thdt the captain never failed to spread himself. Kor hours at a time the octogenarian would sit spellbound drinking in tales of early life in Illi nois, many of which were contempora neous with his own boyhood days. The habit grew upn him, and after Mrs. Brokaw’s death Capt. Ijams was in vited to put in all his time with the aged widower and take up story-tell ing as a steady job. Was lAais O fecial “Story Teller.” So Capt. Ijams accepted the posi tion of grand vizier and raeonteur-in ehief to Harou.n Brokaw. No salary wrs mentioned in connection with the office, but Ijaras figured that so long as he could make the old gentleman laugL he-would have little trouble to induce him to iocsen up financially. Moreover, it was a safe gamble that his stock of stories would, last longer than the venerable listener, and then the latter would more than square tilings in his will. Jams started In systematically with his choice line of Chauncey M. Do pe w’s favorites, then want on with his early Illinois legends and persona! recollections of Abraham Lincoln, and lii’.aliy brought up in the comparative ly modern period of Urn civil war. By this iirae he would have Mr. Brokaw going so that he could read a chapter or two trom the Bible, and the dear old men would chuckle delightedly over; "Abraham begat Isaac, and Isaac begat Jacob, and Jacob begat Judas and Iiis brethren; and Judas begat Phares and Zara of Tharnar; and Phares begat Esrom, and Esrom be gat Aram, and Aram begat Aminadab,” and so on. The great stream of the antiques was this quotation from a Latin writer of the first century of the Cbrist.iau era; “A man who fired a rock at a dog and hit his mother-in law said, ‘Not such a bad shot at that! ‘ ” Here is a specimen from early Illi nois? : “Jake Spawr was one of the three commissioners appointed to lay out tim turnpike road between Chicago and Springfield. The act required that these commissioners should be sworn, but there was no official handy to per form this duty. So Jake, as a justice of the peace, administered the oath to the other two commissioners and then raised up the lid oi a shoe-box with a looking-glass inside it, and solemnly administered the oath to his reflection in the! mirror, thus swearing himself in, so that he could legally help to con struct the pike.” IhiB Lincoln story was one that old man Brokaw pronounced “a bird:” “Lincoln and Douglas were travel ing together by stage-coach from La con to Pontiac, when they got into a heated persnal debate, and Lincoln more than hinted that there was a liar in their party of two, and that it wasn't himself. This meant tight. At the next stopping place tho fiery Douglas pulled a pair of pistols out of his carpetbag and proposed to ‘Abe' that they arbitrate their differences with cold lead. Lincoln drew himself up and said: ‘I am about twice your ! height, and would be too<easy a mark for you. To make things even, you’ll have t:o stand further away from me than I do from you.’ Douglas began to see the joke and replied: “No; I’ll tell you what we’ll do. I’ll mark out my size on your person, and every shot that hits outside the mark won’t count.’ Then they had a drink together and called the fight off.’’ Another warm baby was this waif from the battlefield: “An Irish corporal was carrying a wounded comrade to the rear and did in the Bame manner that alloyed alum inum compares with brass. The elas tic limit of 99 per cent, pure aluminum is for castings in tension 8,500 pounds; sheet, 12,500 ^ 25,00); wire, 16,000 to 33,000; bars, 14,000 to 23,000 pounds per square inch. Under transverse tests aluminum is not very rigid, although the metal will bend nearly double before breaking, while cast iron, under similar condi tions. i3 broken very easily. The ten sile strength of aluminum Is greatly improved by subjecting the ingots to forging and pressing at a temperature the tensile strength of pure aluminum of 600 degrees Fahrenheit. Taking in relation to its weight, it is as strong as steel of 80,000 pounds per square inch. Aluminum property alloyed with nickel is much stronger than the pore metal, as may be seen by the follow ing figures: Nickel aluminum has aa ultimate strength per square inch ten slon in the form of castings of 18,00( to 28,000 pounds; lq the form of sheet of 35,000 to 50,000, and' in bars, 30,00< to 45,000. The elastic limit la tension pei not notice when a cannon-ball whizzed by and took the poor fellow's head off. When Pat reached the ambu lance with his burden the surgeon asked: *What are you bringing in that headless corpse for?’ The Irish man turhed and looked at the remains and exclaimed disgustedly: 'Begob, he tould me it was his leg!’ ” And Ijams could at any moment throw the aged plowmaker into con vulsions of laughter by repeating Josh Billings' recipe for making hoe-cake: “Take a common or garden hoe, boil her down till she jells and then let her cake.” uay alter day and week after week Capt. Ijams continued reeling off these stories, quips and cranks. The old millionaire grew feebler, but kept alive just to laugh. Since then Ijams has suspected that Mr. Brokaw was laughing at something else besides his jokes. But for two or three years everything went merrily as a marriage bell. Speaking of marriage bells recalls the fact that old man Brokaw was de cidedly of a re-marrying disposition, yet he wouldn’t give in to It because he suspected that the many women who offered to be a nurse, a sister or nny old companion to htm were only after his money. Had to Keep the Old Maids Away. It was to keep these designing fe males at a safe distance that Miss Selina Lantz, spinster and house keeper, was specially engaged. She got to be so busy shooing off old maids and grass widows, that Capt. Ijams had to help her. In addition to his humorous stunts, the captain for a long period acted as Miss Lantz’s chief aid in protecting Abram Brokaw from the onslaught and blandish ments of the female sex. Finally, one day, as Ijams was tell ing jokelet No. 1,031, about a man who slipped on a banana peel, poor | Mr. Brokaw gave a loud chuckle and | expired. Capt. Ijams* grief was tempered by the thought that his long and faithful services were to be substantially re warded. Alas! When the last will and testa ment of Abram Brokaw came to pro bate, the name of Lewis E. Ijams was conspicuously missing from its list of legatees. That was funny, very funny! And for once the joke was on Ijams. Then the captain brought his fa mous suit against the Brokaw heirs. The court decided that he was en titled to some compensation, but that his claim of ten dollars per story was in excess of the regular wage-rates of the Jokesmiths’ union; so he was awarded $5,050, which the Brokaw es tate paid. The captain, meanwhile, had exe cuted a sentimental flank movement on Miss Lantz, for whose especial delectation he told his one hundred and( second funny story, which was as follows: a girl wno was Desiegea wnn aa- ; mirers on shipboard, while cross »g the Atlantic, asked the captain’s ad vice. He said: ‘Well, the weather is fine, and you know how to swim. Sup pose you accidentally fall overboard, and then accept the young man who jumps after you.’ So. the girl tried it. Four of her beaux were on deck at the time, and three of them „ jumped, simultaneously. The fourth cautiously threw a life-preserver. When the young lady had been fished out, she sent for the captain, and said: ‘What shall I do now? I can’t marry the whole three.' ‘Well,’ responded the captain, ‘I should advise you to take the dry one.’ “Now, Selina,” continued Ijams, “the moral of this story is, that lots of fellows will be jumping after you, but I’m the only dry one—dry humor, you know. You’d better take me. Will you?” Selna saw the point, and whispered a coy “yes.” They were married here and have settled down happily on their little jokefarm in McLean county. square inch of nickel aluminum is as follows: In castings, 8,500 to 12.000 pounds; sheet, 21,000 to 30.000. and bars, 18,500 to. 25,000. Th* average tensile strength of brass when cast is 18,000 pounds per square inch; when j cast is 18,000 pounds per squa>e inch; ' when in the form of wire, 49,000 pounds. Bronze or gunmetal has an average tensile strength of 36.000 pounds p& square inch.—Philadelphia Record. • Teeth foi Charms. Sig. Mascagni ard h’S wife wear watch charms alike, and these have been the occasion of some curious comment . They are common Italian coins, each punctured with six 'holes, in which are set bits of white substance, the nature of which is not apparent except on close exam ination. These are,' in reality, the teeth of the first two Mascagni children; the teeth of the mother's j charm being the first of her tittle j daughter’s, while the proud father wears , in Ms charm the milk-teeth! of his first-bora sou. ! BASIS OF WEALTH MOTHER EARTH 'KIND TO ALL HER CHILDREN. THE GREATNESS OF NATIONS Utilization of Natural Resources Goes Hand in Hand with Civilization— Exhaustible and Renewable Riches. —:-: i Old mother earth is the basis of all wealth. Greatness of aiations is com mensurate with the degree of utiliza ion of the mineral elements and other products, all of which are the result of natural laws. The higher the civ ilization the greater and the more eco nomical are the uses of the earth’s resources. In the great commercial and manufacturing centers of the world is found the superior intelli gence. Wherever there is industry there flourishes civilization. With the decay of commercial importance nations retrograde and lose power, and finally find a place in history only. Wealth of countries can be divided into two classes; that which is ex haustible, and that which is renewable. The exhaustible is the mineral wealth, gold, silver, iron, copper, and all the useful metals—coal, salt, sulphur, oil and mineral products which once util ized In manufacture and commerce are not renewable. The renewable wealth Is entirely In the vegetable and ant mal kingdom and nearly all of it is ircluded in the. field of agriculture, i»3ing the word In its broadest sens?, and is represented by the crops of cereals, vegetables, fruits, fibrous plants, the useful gums, such as rub ber, the woods of trees and all that is of utility in the arts and manufac tures. The wealthiest nations, and those that give promise of the longest ex istence, are those that possess abun dance of both exhaustible and renew able wealth. Both classes afford a field for manufacture and commerce'. The nation that lacks the conditions necessary for the production of re-, newable wealth, and only has exhaust ible wealth, will eventually And its resources for self-sustalnence at an end. and will of necessity become de pendent upon some other nation. No other nation possesses such di versified resources as does the Unit ed States. With mineral resources that will renuire ages of tim° to util ize, the millions upon milliQns of rich timber and agricultural lands rep resenting renewable wealth, and every natural advantage for manufacture, wi'hin its vast territory hundreds of millions of people can find homes and sustenance for thousands of years to come, and if necessary suprly oth°r rations with a surplus of its products. Thus the nation will grow riche, through disposing of Its renewable wealth for what represents the labor and the exhaustible wealth of less fa vored nations. The countries comprising Great Britain have little renewable wealth according to population, and relies chiefly upon exhaustible resources, their utilization in manufacture and the value of the labor of its people In manufacture for commerce of arti cles from the raw products, both min eral and vegetabls, imported from her dependencies and other nations. It is plain that the nation that ex changes its raw, exhaustible wea’t’a for the renewable wealth of another country will grow poorer, and the na tion that receives this exhaustible wea’th in exchange for its renewable wealth will grow richer. Principles that apply to nations in this regard, are also applicable to In tegral parts of nations, and in a re public like the United States, to its states and lesser communities. Thus it is patent that the state or com munity that employs its people In man ufacturing from its products to the greatest extent, instead of having them go to the markets of the world in a raw state, and retains within its borders the profits accruing fron/ labor employed in the product'on of its articles of commerce, will advance in wealth and importance. D. M. CARR. SAPS LOCAL WEALTH. Systems That Deaw frcm Circulation Money That. Shculd Be Kept Home. t - That city, town or community from which the major part of the earnings of the people are sent elsewhere is destined to go backward and take a place in the rear of progressive com munities. It will never have the full quota of wealth that is due It, and that it shculd have. It Is the profits, the amounts that represent the sur plus above cost of production of prod ucts. and the earnings of the laborer above his expenses of living, and the legitimate profits of the merchants and others in business that makes a com munity wealthy. When these earnings are diverted to foreign places their local tax-paying and up-building pow er is destroyed and the places re ceiving the money acquire a benefit. If you desire to see the greatest measure of prosperity in your own town, keep every dollar you can In circulation at home. The bins cor poration or individual that has its ex istence elsewhere and has a mortgage on your farm or other property, en joys a means of making you bear a portion of ,th« burden of taxes of an other section than your own. It mat ters' not by what means your money reaches outside your own bailiwick, It results in the same eviL You are helping those who pay none of the cost of maintaining the institution of your own town and county. Gay Costumes in Church. “New Yorkers take their religion as gayly as they take everything else,” remarked the woman from the count ry. “Now, you know, out home we mostly dress in sombre clothing when we go to hear A sermon. If not black, dark gray almost like it, mouse col ored things, anything but bright col ors, bat I wish you could have seen the drees of ‘bo women at the Little Church Around the Corner last gun day morning. It was a pretty sight THRIFT AND ECONOMY. Right Thinking Neceasary to Great est Success in Every Field of Endeavor. Economy is one of the essentials to success. It matters not how great one’s earnings may be. if there is no pennies laid by, there will be no counting of dollars to your credit. From childhood children should ba taught lessons of thrift, and the value of saving. There is a difference be tween economy and stinginess. Thero is an excess which defeats the aim. and is the cause of loss and misery. That economy which prevents the farmer from spending money to prop erly house his stock during the win ter, is paradoxical. It is a saving of dollars and the loss of dollars by the saving. That so-called economy which prevents the consuming of fuel in winter, which results in a cold house and sickness in the family, and perhaps 'a death, is niggardly stingi ness, which is criminal. It is the sav ing of a few dollars in the coal bill, and paying perhaps a hundred or more to the doctor or the undertaker. There is no economy in cheap things gen erally. A bit of machinery that is needed about the farm should be the best. A cheap, poor mowing machine from some mail order house may break down when it is needed the most, and a result is the loss of tons of hay several times the value of a good machine. Poor articles wear out rapidly, and are likely to give out at a time when most needed, and are a continual source of expense. A poor breed of stock is another illustration. Poor, bony horses eat more than well bred ones, and the latter always find a ready sale, while the raw-bones cannot be disposed of at any price. The same with hogs, sheep, and all classes of domestic stock. A poor lot of ani mals should be gotten rid of as soon as possible. They are expensive and it is poor economy to keep them. It is in looking after the saving of a penny and being blind to the dollar that could be gained that is the trou ble with many. Savages have no idea of economy. They cannot fore go a small pleasure for a greater one a little farther doff. It is the ability to think out these matters that makes the civilized man superior to the bar barian Think! Don’t get tired of using the reasoning brain that a good Providence has given you. The secret of knowledge is in thinking, and •the power to make comparison. One of th£ drawbacks of many schools is the teaching, the cramming of rules and facts without combining with them the importance of cause and ef fect. Teach one to think, and he will soon be a person of no mean knowl edge. It is the thinker who wins in life, and on the farm, iu Lhe workshop, in the store, anywhere and every where, where brains are needed, you will find it is the active, keen and careful thinker who forges to the j front I). M. CARR 1 INTERESTS ARE EQUAL. Farmers Should Cooperate with Towns people in Work of Municipal Improvement. Among the many plans devised to further the interests of small towns and cities, and which has proved most successful, is the commercial clubs in which all business men of the commu nity cooperate for the common good. Organizations of this class are al most a necessity in any town where harmony is desired among the differ ent business classes in the carrying out of plans for town improvement, securing the enterprises of various kinds and the general good of all in the community. There is no reason why these clubs in their membership should be confined to the residents of the town. The farmers in the neigh borhood are as deeply interested in the success of town enterprises as are the business men of the place, or at least they should be. For what will help along the town towards pros perity will also help the farmer. In many localities there is a senti ment that the interests of the farm er and the business men are not par allel. It is necessary that this feel ing be obliterated as far as possible because there is no logical foundation for it. The better the town is the bet ter the local market for the farmers' produce; the more equitable will be taxation and the better educational fa cilities. All these are matters that concern the farmer in the immediate neighborhood ol the town. Many business men feel that a membership in clubs organized for promotion of two industries should be confined to business men; that perhaps the farm er would not be in accord with resi dents of the town In matters of public Improvements. This is an error, a lack of confidence In the good Judg ment of the average farmer, who will generally realize how important the home town is to him. and all his neigh bors. Then the farmer sometimes thinks that he is not welcome in an as sociation of business men, perhaps be cause he has never been invited to take part in meetings held to discuss matters pertaining to town affairs. There is no gytd reason why these sentiments should exist. It is only t>y a harmonious pulling together of the residents of the rural districts and the business men that the greatest good can be,brought about for the home town. Insurance. “You’d better take out some life in surance.’’ “Go on. I’m so healthy I won’t die for 60 years yet.' “But if you get a policy you’ll prob ably work yourself to death paying premiums.” , It matched the brilliant coloring of the stained glass In the windows, and fortunately they toned it down a little or it would have looked like a kaleid oscope. Red, blue, green, yellow hats with flowers on them; with grapes tin them, with cherries on them, and light blue chiffon veils! Yes, light bine chiffon automobile veils! “Out in the country we would as lief fly to tffe moon/ as wear a light bine chiffon automobile veil to hear a sermon, and yet It was pretty. It certainly was.”—New York Press. Mfc’.W . VJ:-'. ■ - ' -it.-', * ....... sw- -tavJzwas. wot satisnea with tne present facil ities for fitting^ his sons for the ca reer of soldier, "Uncle Sam is soon to open at Washington a war college, where the art of war may be taught in all of its intricacies. A new war college building has been erected and a model military post is to be es tablished as part of the college equip ment. All this has been accomptshed at a cost of $2,000,000, and it is here that the officers of the regular army and the national guard will be given a postgraduate course jn military science. The project has been in the making for several years past, and even now ambition is not fully realiz ed in so far as the model military post is concerned, but the war college prop er Is in readiness for its commissioned pupils, and so the school is to be call ed to order for serious work. The nation's newest war college is very much superior In every way to any similar seat of professional learn ing possessed by any other world power. Just here is should be em phasized that this new school of ad vanced instruction is an army war col lege, for the navy already has a war college of its own, located at New port, R. I. The new army college rather surpasses its naval rival in some respects, but it must be borne in mind that it will have to care for a greater number of students than are usually in attendance at the school maintained by the other arm of the service. The lact that it was desired to pro vide, supplementary to the college structure, a group of representative buildings for a model military post made is incumbent upon the war tie partment to use considerable care in the selection of a site, and choice fin ally fell upon a historic spot on the bank of the Potomac river and serving as what might be termed the water gateway to oar national capital. Here there have been erected, in accord ance with a grodp plan, a magnificent college building and officers’ quarters, officers mess, barracks, a supply de pot, storehouses for the quartermaster and commissary and the other neces sary units of a military community. Not only is the college building a thing of beauty, but every effort has been made to make it fireproof in or der to provide a sdfe repository for the invaluable library, the collection of models and other rare possessions which will have place in the refer ence archives of the War college. The home of the college, which is of brick, and has re-enforced concrete construc tion, is of classic design, suggestive of the Roman basilica style. The structure measures 260 feet in length by 125 feet in depth, with a bay win dow on the south side 37 feet in diam eter. The building rises to a height of two stories above a basement and in the center of the front facade is the main entrance pavilion, which has been designed as the principal orna mental feature of the exterior design. The pavilion consists of a pedi mental gable, with massive piers on either side and beautifully propor tioned Ionic columns in the center. These columns support an entablature, above which is a semicircular opening. In the center of the opening thus formed is the emblematic figure of an eagle, thrown into bold relief by the shadow#. The entrance pavilion de sign is reproduced to an extent at either end of the building, while the portions of the structure flanking the pavilion are in the plaster style of treatment, the pilasters being several feet lower than the Ionic columns in the center. The plan of the roof pre sents the form of a cross with a low octangoaal dome at the intersection. In front of the War College building is a terrace with a graceful balustrade half a thousand feet in length. Here is located the statue of Frederick the Great, presented to this nation by the German emperor, and with it will be grouped tb« bronze figures of other famous warriors who have places m history. , The recently completed Institution at Washington is to be known official ly as the United States War College and Engineer School of Application, and more than 50 buildings will have place within its boundaries when the scheme is worked out in its entirety. The plan that has been carried out has involved the distribution of the many buildings around an immense quad rangle drill ground. This park is crossed by a driveway running east ^ and west, while on either side of the reservation near the boundary this road leads into two roadways running north and south, the entire length of tjie reservation. The object of this vast project which has cost the country millions of dollars is to make study profitable and popular among our army officers —in other words to provide them with facilities for self-help in their chosen profession and to encourage men of genius to develop their talent along lines in which they have especial pro ficiency. Uncle Sam’s new system of military education is a close parallel to our public school system—with the W ar college corresponding to the high school—but with only a portion of the soldierly pupils will attendance be compulsory. I he younger officers in the various branches of the service will be “or dered” to attend the War college and other schools, whereas the older men in the military service will be merely urged to participate. However, spe cial records are to be kept regarding every individual who shows special capacity in the school work so that officers who are ambitious for promo tion or specially desirable details of duty will probably find it to their ad vantage to make a good.showing in , this new-fangled book learning. In cidentally it may be noted that the provision in conjunction with the War college of a fully garrisoned military post will enable the instructors at the college to illustrate their teachings as to tactics, campaigning, etc., by prac tical object lessons, furnished by the maneuvers of seasoned troops. Eaters of Camphor. .It is surprising what a number of camphor eaters there are among the well-to-do classes. The idea seems to prevail that this article, taken in small and regular doses, gives a peculiarly clear creaminess of complexion, and score of young women buy it for this very purpose. The habit is, more over, very difficult to cast aside, for camphor produces a mild form of exhilaration and stupefaction, and in many instances where very large doses have been swallowed the habit has become a sort of slavery. These comphor eaters all have a dieainy. dazed and very listless air, and In most of them there is an ever pres ent longing to sleep, or at least rest. Extreme weariness generally follows the taking of regular dcsea, and cases have been seen where it has been almost difficult to tell the ef fects from those of alcohol. As to the complexion, if a ghastly pallor be an improvement, camphor certainly produces it.—Dundee Advertiser. Didn’t Harmonize. Patience—That artist friend of yours is the greatest man for harmony I ever saw. Patrice—Do you really think 90? “I do.” “Well, I don’t. I saw him out riding to-day with a sorrel-top girl and a bru nette horse.”—Yonkers Statesman. Steadiness Well Proved. ^ Relative—Well, I sincerely hope you will be happy with him, Mandy. Is he a steady young man? Miss Mandy—Steady! My goodness. Aunt Judy, he's been coming to see me for more than 11 years.—Stray Stories. ' EAT WHILE YOU WORK. President of Seabord Wants Em ployes to Follow His Plan. “Work while you eat and eat while you work.” In a nutshell such Is the order which President W’. A. Garrett of the Seaboard Air Line sends out to the of ficials c? the road in a circular letter just issued. “I always take a bite with me in the morning,” declared the railroad presi dent in the circular, “and when lunch time comes I eat it at my desk, there by losing little time from my work. I think it wouldn’t be a bad idea if you would do likewise.” , • So far as can be ascertained the recipients of the circular haven’t taken the matter very seriously. The is suance of the quick-lunch circular brings to mind the fact that President Garrett is also an early riser. When in the city he is always at his desk each morning at 7 o’clock,. dis posing of business, even before the ar rival of .his stenographer and cler ical assistants. When on the road, where he spends most of his time in a private car, he rises at 5 a. m. on summer mornings, putting in a good hour’s time each morning with his stenographer before partaking of breakfast. This fact has made it dif ficult, of late, for him to keep a ste nographer for any length of time. When he came with the Seaboard about nine months ago frcm the Queen and Crescent, one of the first things President Garrett did was to issue a general circular letter requesting all ^employes of the read to abstahi from the obnoxious cigarette habit, and also to refrain from use of intoxicating liquors. The circular created quite a flurry, and for a while cigarette users became almost as scarce as hen’s teeth in the Seaboard’s general office building. Naturally. "My lawyer recommends this to me as a feasible course." "That proves nothing as to its > merit.” J "It doesn't f "Of course sot My dear, to a law yer all courses are fee-sibl3.”—Balti more American. nr' -
