A Pretty Frock.
An original frock seen on a young
girl at the luncheon hour might easily
be reproduced by any clever dress
maker. It was a white mull of heavy
and firm quality laid in side plaits
around the hips, these being released
just below the hip line. It was of
round length and was finished at the
bottom with an almost knee-deep
flounce of all-over English embroidery
done in scallops at the lower edge as
well as the top and having run
through the top two lines of half-inch
black velvet ribbon two inches apart,
these gathered the ruffle and were tied
at the left side in careless bows.
The deep girdle, which merely
rounded down a little at the front, was
of finest white kid and closed with a
silver buckle.
The short Eton coat was entirely of
the openwork embroidery, unlined and
worn over a blouse of mull to match
the skirt. The jacket, which other
wise would have hung straight, was
also gathered or drawn in below the
bust by a half-inch black velvet ribbon
run through the openwork embroidery,
and a butterfly bow of wider black
velvet ribbon finished the front, where
the narrow ribbon ends met. The
sleeves—large, single puffs of the
embroidery—had similar velvet lac
ings at the elbow that gathered the
scalloped edges at the bottom into
three-inch ruffles. Both the sleeves
and the jacket wrere cut from wide
embroidered flouncings, and therefore
had embroidered scallops as a finish
at their edges. The Eton jacket did
not extend over the shoulders, but the
back and the front were held in place
by two straps of half-inch velvet rib
bon going over each shoulder; one of
these straps finished, or rather con
cealed, the others, some two inches
from the sleeve strips, held the body
of the jacket in place. In the front,
revers cut from the mull, the shape of
a shawl cut diagonally through the
center, were joined to the jacket tops;
these were hand embroidered and had
hemstitched edges. In the back, how
ever, the straight-across top showed
scallops to match <he lower edge. The
stock and front of the mull under
blouse were embroidered to match the
revers on the jacket and the elbow
sleeves of mull were finished t>y nar
row embroidered bands.
A broad-brimmed white hat. trim
med with black velvet ribbon and
sprays of wistaria, topped the frock,
one of the prettiest seen this summer
in town.
For Neatness and Taste.
Here are a few pointers on coming
fashions. Sleeves are to continue
short. Skirts are to either trail on
the ground or be very short; no more
will be seen the ankle-length gowns
which are so unbecoming to the aver
age figure. Skirts that just escape
the ground seem to be a woman’s idea
of a comfortable dress, when in real
ity it is an ugly and dirty length. I
say dirty because it gathers up more
dust than you can imagine, and of
course can never oe held up.
Let me say a word on the subject of
holding up your gown. Have you
ever watched the various ways it can
be done? Have you sat in any pub
lic place and seen a stream of wom
en. fat and thin, tall and short, old
and young, and after growing thor
oughly discouraged at the way they
walk and hold themselves begin to
notice their different ways of doing
things?
Call to your mind the fat woman in
a hurry to catch a train; her bonnet
slightly askew, her flushed face, and
that frightful shopping hag, with
leather handles, which she holds to
gether, to hold in the bundles whicn
are oozing out. The bag itself is one
of those flat cloth ones which nine
out of ten women love. With her
other hand she clutches the skirt at
the side, toward the front, and hoids
it high in the air, showing, usually a
cloth boot with elastic sides and a
stout ankle. Her gown trails out in
every direction and she moves like
a frigate under full sail, as the wind
slowly creeps under and inflates the
skirt, while she, sublimely uncon
scious, lifts the skirt higher in Just
tnac one place, and sails on to her
moorings.
Don’t you remember the girl who
holds her skirt tightly about her, as
if lashed to the mast, bundling it
all up about her any which way, and
half the time her boots or shoes are
not what they should be, and her pet
ticoat is frayed or soiled.
How many people can stand having
their feet looked at? You have all
made a study of a row of feet In
some electric car, begining at one end,
and following right along the line, and
you have noticed the rapidity with
which the women haul down their
•kirts and the men shift and wiggle
and try to sit on their feet. Per
haps one in that whole car will i t
serenely satisfied and allow ycu to
look and admire, and to wish the
wnole world would go and do like
wi .
No woman Is so beautiful and no
man so good-looking that they can
afford to be slip shod about anything.
When shoes get down at the heel
they should be repaired or disposed
of. I don’t care whether tney are
otherwise perfectly good. Get good,
expensive shoes, made to fit, and of
the best material. Never leave them
off without at once putting them on
trees, for that makes shoes keep their
shape. Now, the average person
doesn’t tree shoes except now and
then, or when they are being cleaned,
and, having one pair only, this is no
good.
Invest In skeleton trees at least,
which are $1 a pair, and keep every
slipper and shoe on them, whether
traveling, visiting or at home. Al
ways keep the shoes clean; if colored
kid use cleansing fluid; if brown or
white get proper materials and learn
how to do it yourself, for in many
houses it is not done for you, and you
should go prepared.
I’ve known many a girl to wear
the same shoes for weeks without
treeing or cleansing, and yet sne had
good clothes and thought she looked
well. Being neat and fresh is as im
portant as taking the trouble to re
member the names of every numan
being you meet, and always have a
smile and cordial bow to greet them
with. It not only brings you happi
ness in endless ways, and helps you
an untold amount in politics, business
or social life, but it brightens many a
sad heart and lightens the burden on
many tired shoulders.—Exchange.
Wool Waists.
The wool waist gains in favor over
heavy linens and chevoits for cool
weather. White is more desirable,
but light colors are seen and plaids
will be worn a great deal for informal
occasions. The lingerie waists will be
worn all winter, and soft silks have by
no means lost popularity. Among the
wool waists batiste, flannel, mohair,
albatross and veiling are favorites.
All of these except flannel wash per
fectly, and flannel is not impossible,
if the laundress be an expert. Ordi
narily it is better to have flannel dry
cleaned. New wool waists trimmed
with eyelet embroidery are interest
ing novelties. They are to be had in
half a dozen fabrics, the softer ma
terials such as albatross being very
pretty.
Street Suit of Silk.
Changeable silk will be largely used
for fall costumes and are wonderfully
effective. Among an early showing
was one in greens and browns, the
different shades harmonizing beauti
fully. The design has a plain, full
skirt, with four applied tucks at bot
tom. The jacket is of the collarless
bolero type with applied tucks in de
sign. It closes in surplice fashion and
has two wide pieces of Persian em
broidery in delicate shades as revers.
The strapped pieces of silk around the
neck are fastened down in front with
fancy buttons. Mosquetaire gloves are
worn, therefore the sleeves are quite
short with a straight cuff of brown
velvet.
Black Lace Coats are Coming.
Black lace coats are to be very
smart next winter, and are also worn
now with black chiffon gowns. The
chiffon and lace combine extremely
well and often when it is desired to
have a sharp contrast the fashion is
to Wear a white lace coat with a black
skirt. A bolero of white lace on a
black dress, if a woman has a good
enough figure to carry it off well, is
always smart and effective, but if the
figure is not all that may be desired,
then it is just as well to have the
lace in black also, thus eliminating
the sharp contrast outlining the fig
ure.
oudoir
Evidences
One of the most popular fashions of
this season is the surplice waist.
The simple coat for general wear
is the short cut, tan covert cloth.
Hemstitched ruffles are very neat
and are seen in the most exclusive
things.
The wearing of a scarf in tulle,
chtfTon. lace or thin silk has become a
veritable furore.
All the fashionable garments for
street and evening wear reveal the
short-waisted tendency.
Black and white pin-checked taffeta
is being made up into sweet little box
coats for baby’s wear.
A new changeable velvet in three
shades, called scarabee, will be among
the successful novelties.
Corset covers are trimmed almost
alike front and back, but the decora
tions rarely extend below a pretty
yoke depth.
The bright, scarlet coats, displaying
green broadcloth collars, are still con
sidered the smartest for the small
man's wear.
New gold cuff pins come in odd
twisted shapes, some of them made in
imitation of the old English hand-en
graved styles.
A new handbag looks as though
made of some silver tissue. It is gray,
in an ordinary light, but in the sun
changes and sparkles.
The kimono craze has extended to
wraps, and now the most gorgeous
evening creations fashioned along
these lines are shown.
• - Many of the early fall models In
millinery have high, wide brims, high
crowns and are trimmed with sweep
ing ostrich feathers that are shaded.
One of the most notable whlnur this
season is the mixture of materials or
every varying te<ture, not so much as
trimmings, but as a whole part of the
design.
Combs of all sorts and sizes are
worn, and where a set of combs used
to consist of a big comb and two side
combs, it now comprises five combs
and a barrette. .
Short Skirts the Rule.
Very short skirts are the absolute
rule and it matters little what the ma
terial may be. The short skirt is here
to stay for some time at least and
those who contemplate making up a
gown would do well to take heed and
study Its ways. The short skirt has
many things in its favor. It is very
light in weight, for it is abbreviated
to such an extent that flounces and
ruffles are almost impossible. It is be
coming to the feet. It is comfortable
and it takes little material. More than
all these, it is fashionable and the
fashion has spread until it now
reaches Paris and is popular in Vien
na, where there was the greatest pro
test against it. The Paris modistes
are chopping off the gowns right at
the ankles. The new short skirts are
much shorter than the former ones
They are now made instep high and
some of them are even less. They
most decidedly show the feet, and this
calls for the prettiest of shoes.
Handkerchief in the Glove.
The fashionable handkerchief of to
day must be as small as possible and
the newest thing is a tiny handker
chief to be carried in the glove. It is
a piece of the finest muslin a few
inches square, trimmed with lace, and
small enough and soft enough to be
kept in the glove. On it the name or
monogram is embroidered in the
smallest letters and the whole thing
is so useless that the owner only just
escapes being without a handkerchief
at all.
A Chic Afternoon Hat.
A dainty hat for afternoon wear Is
pale blue Neapolitan with Tam
O’Shanter crown. The brim is faced
with tiny folds of black tulle and
shaded, blue wings and blue velvet
ribbon adorn the top.
Gems of Buttons.
At last the wheel has turned to the
fashion of fancy buttons. Now' is the
hour to get out our ancient treasures.
Jeweled buttons will be much worn
this fall and winter, amethysts, rubies
topazes and emeralds being generally
employed. Many of these buttons are j
surrounded with rhinestones and with
this framed effect they look very
much like brooches. Among the new
styles are miniature buttons decorated
with portraits of famous court beau
ties of 100 years ago, and Dresden
buttons on which appear the Napo
leonic wreath.
New Lingerie Frock.
A dainty sheer frock in canary ba
tiste is a suggestion for a garden
party frock. The bodice is intricately
set with Valenciennes insertion and a
wide collar of batiste embroidery is
edged with a frill of narrow Valen
ciennes lace. Tiny pearl buttons trim
on each side of front and the girdle is
striped white and black silk. On the
skirt, which is finely tucked over the
hips, is a deep flounce inset with in
sertion and edged with narrow lace.
Revival of the Caster.
The table caster is being revived,
but it is as a wee accessory for each
individual cover, and not the large
stand for the center of the table.
These little casters contain bottles for
pepper and salt and a vinegar cruet.
Other small ones have a tiny bottle
at either side of the stand with a hol
low dish for salt suspended between
them. They are very cunning and
give an altogether modern air to a
table.
New Idea in Chemisettes.
Chemisettes have been rushed to
death, yet the prettiest of the simpler
blouses show evidence that the craze
isn’t over by any means. Not that
separate chemisettes are worn with
blouses, but the yoke takes the form
of an attached chemisette, the blouse
folding over it, and usually being fin
ished with scallops, embroidered by
hand.
Barley Meal Scones.
Add a little salt to as much bar
ley meal as you require, and mix with
it sufficient hot milk to make a thick
paste. Roll out thin and cut into
three-cornered pieces; bake in a very
quick oven. Cut open and butter
while hot.
Highland Scones.
To one pound flour add four ounces
butter, as much hot milk as will make
a dough, and two well beaten eggs.
Mix quickly and roll out. Cut to any
shape wanted and bake on a griddle.
Must be served hot and eaten whlls
fresh. 1
mmm
The Cause of Pear Blight.
For ten years I have grown pears
for market and have watched and stud
ied the trees almost daily during that
time, and I cannot agree with experi
ment station men and others as to
the cause of pear blight. 1 cannot
believe that pear blight is caused by
bacteria or that a microbe has any
thing to do with it. An experiment
station professor writing in "Country
Life in America” recently went so far
as to say that the pear blight microbe
is in the nectar of the pear blossoms
and is carried by bees from flower to
flower. I think it is hardly possible
for the nectar to be anything but pure
when the blossoms open. I think pear
blight is caused by conditions of soil
and climate. On certain soils and
elevations even in Illinois, pear trees
are free from blight
Frank Aikin.
Illinois.
The cause of pear blight is now
very well known. There is no ques
tion at all of its being a germ disease.
The microscope has revealed its char
acter and it has been isolated and ex
amined. The spore of the fungus that
causes pear blight is both heavy and
sticky and cannot be blown by the
wind from one place to another. It
used to be supposed that it could be
blown from one tree to another and
that this would account for the sud
den appearance of pear blight after
a windy and wet period. The germ oi
pear blight lives over winter in the
live wood adjoining dead wood that
has been killed by blight. Insects,
especially bees, sip the sap from
wounds in infected trees and later
visit the tips of trees where small
leaves are being formed or blossoms
are opening. The spores of the pear
blight stick to the limbs of the insects
just as pollen sticks to them. When
the insects suck the nectar in the
flowers, the spores are rubbed off and
fall into the flower. From those
spores, minute plants of a thread-like
character develop. These plants grow
through the sap wood and through the
leaves and use up the life fluid that
should go to feed the leaves. The
leaves then wilt and turn color, and
we say the tree has been blighted.
There is much yet to be learned about
pear blight, but the foundation has
been well worked out.—Farmers’ Re
view.
Fruit Exhibit at Fairs.
Societies having the control of the
fruit exhibit at fairs should see to it
that, so far as possible, every variety
of fruit grown in the state shall be
represented at each exhibition. Man
agers of agricultural societies should
remember that these exhibitions are
for the purpose of instruction and for
the stimulation of fruit growing. They
^re not mere gambling devices by
which a few men can make as much
money as possible out of the premi
ums. Many of our exhibits are defi
cient in the number of varieties dis
played. Certain orchardists are in
vited in, and these generally make a
display of the fruit they grow them
selves. Some of the varieties that are
thriving best in the state are not
shown at all. The managers of the
exhibit could, by a very little work
bring in all the different varieties of
fruit being grown in the locality rep
resented by the fair. This should be
done even if the management has tc
buy a few plates of good fruit, of va
rietiea that wrouId not otherwise be
represented. The matter of instruc
tion should be made much of, and ev
ery variety should be fully designated
by lettered or printed labels that are
large enough to be read by all. Very
frequently the labels on the fruits are
very badly written on slips of paper
and are placed where they are
weighed down by the fruit. This may
be satisfactory to the judges, but
would hardly do much in instructing
the public.
Orchard Cover Crop.
At this season of the year a cover
crop may be put into the orchard that
has been cultivated, especially if this
orchard is in the north. Experiments
made with cover crops show that they
very materially reduce the distance
that the frost enters the ground. In
some cases the common vetch has
been planted in the orchard in mid
summer, and has made a good growth
during the fall, covering the orchard
with a carpet of green. This plant
freezes during the winter, but the
carpet it makes reduces the power oi
the frost to pentrate the ground. In
one test In Wisconsin, where the frost
went twenty inches without this cover,
it went only twelve inches with it. It
is too late now to plant alfalfa or
clover, but cow peas may yet be sown,
as may also winter rye. These will
both make a good cover crop by the
time frost comes, and will serve the
purpose intended. Where orchards
have been in sod all the spring and
summer, they should not be disturbed
in the fall, but the sod should be left
as a cover for the roots of the trees
during the winter.
Sulphur and Cattle 'ricks.
In regions where the cattle are sub
ject to attacks of fever due to the
presence of ticks, the opinion has
gained ground among the cattlemen
that if the cattle are fed large quanti
ties of sulphur, this will prevent them
from being attacked by the ticks, and
if any ticks are on them, they will
fall off. In South Africa a thorough
test is being made of this theory.
Young steers and colts were given
sulphur in their food during a period
of 40 days, receiving one and a half
ounces of sulphur daily. At the end
of this time the dose was increased to
three ounces daily, and this was con
tinued during the infestation. The
steers were then infected with the
ticks. These ticks reached maturity
in the usual time and it was evident
that the prolonged sulphur treatment
did not produce the slightest effect
upon the ticks.
The so-called pedigreeing of plants
is a misnomer, when such plants are
not produced from seed. Selection is
one thing, but it is not pedigreeing.
A plant cannot be its own parent.
How He Fulfilled His Promise.
Mr. Hannibal J. Driesbach, a Mil
waukee man, has been addicted to the
use of the flowing bowl for more than
six years.
One day. however, he promised his
wife that his lips never again should
touch any kind of intoxicating liquor.
No, you mistake. He didn’t take his
drinks thereafter through a straw.
He quit the drinking habit absolute
ly.
There is a rumor that he was arrest
ed the same day for grafting, and has
not had a chance to drink anything
stronger than coffee since, but it can
not be traced to any trustworthy
source. .
Encouraging the Barber.
Hicks—Penniman shaves himself,
doesn’t he?
Wicks—Yes, and he’s got an awful
nerve.
Hicks—How’s that?
Wicks—He’ll give himself a clean
shave and then walk right into a bar
ber shop for a hair cut.
The Reason for It.
“My!” exclaimed the guest, “what
an array of pretty little doilies you
have at my place.”
“Yes,” piped little Willie, “ma says
she can't have you messin up the
clean tablecloth like you did the last
time you were here.”
WHAT INTERESTED HER.
He—“Man proposes,” you know.
She—Does he? Which man?
Girl at Baseball Game.
Patience—So you've been to the
baseball game?
Patrice—Yes, dear.
“Was it interesting?-’
“Oh. very.”
“How did it come out?”
“Why, one side got one run and
the other got two."
“Which won?”
“The one which got two runs.”
“Yes. I know, but did the home
team win, or the visitors?”
“Oh. I didn't ascertain that.”—.on
kers Statesman.
*
Classified.
The society reporter was away on
his vacation and the horse reporter
had been delegated to write up a
wedding.
“But,” protested the editor, glanc
ing over the report, “you failed to
mention the bridegroom’s name.”
"It wasn't necessary.” explained the
equine authority. “He finished among
those who ‘also ran’. ”
Eyes in the Rear.
“It’s strange,” remarked the arch
aeologist, discussing the researches at
Pompeii, “it’s very strange that Pom
peii should have been so unprepared,
that it didn't know what was before
It.”
“Oh. I don't know!” replied Kidder.
“You couldn't expect Pompeii to see
what was before it, considering the
location of its ‘i’s.’ ”
What They Called It There.
“Is there a garage in this town?”
asked the man who was endeavoring
to make an automobile tour of Mis
souri.
“Waal, no.” replied the native, “but
if you’ll go up to the drug store on the
corner there and ask the red headed
clerk for a baiby rattle I reckon he’ll
fix you out with about what you’re
lookin’ fer.”
Poor Child.
Mrs. Hanagan—My! but the Aherns
are crazy mad!
Mrs. Flanagan—What’s the matther
wid thim?
Mrs. Hanagan—In an absint-mlnded
moment they christhened their babv
Aloysius Patrick.’ Just think o’ the
initials of him!—Catholic Standard
and Times.
Disparagement.
“Do you mean to tell me you offer
ed that played-out ward heeler $1,000
for his influence?” asked Senator
Sorghum.
“Yes.” said the willing but inex
perienced worker. “I was afraid you
would call it political corruption.”
“My friend, that isn’t political cor
ruption. That’s frenzied finance.”
An Alternative.
“Poor fellow! His doctor tells him
the only thing that will cure him is a
course of mud baths, and he can’t af
ford to go to the mud springs.”
“But surely he can go into politics
and let the mud come to him."
Not His Experience.
Friend—They say, Cholly, that ex
cessive cigarette smoking weakens the
intellect.
Cholly—WThy—aw—I think my intel
lect is just as strong as ever.
Taken at Her Word.
“She's very unreasonable.”
“In what way?”
“Why, I told her I had half a mind
to kiss her and she said she’d like to
see me try it. and I tried it and she’s
angry.”—Houston Post.
Died Happy.
“The man died eating watermel
ons,” some one said to Brother Dickel.
“Yes, suh,” he replied, “sometimes
Providence puts us in paradise ’fo’
we gits to heaven.”
To Please Him.
Mrs. Ascum—But why do you buy
such expensive things when you know
your husband can’t afford them?
Mrs. Wise—I just do it to please
him.
Mrs. Ascum—To please him?
Mrs. Wise—Yes; there’s nothing he
likes better than a chance to have
something to complain about to his
own people and pose as a martyr.
At the Academy.
Miss Jones—How came you to think
of the subject. Mr. de Brush?
Eccentric Artist—Oh, I have had it
in my head for years.'
Miss Jones—How wonderful! What
did the papers say?
Eccentric Artist—Said it was full of
“Atmosphere,” and suggested “Space.”
— Punch.
Something Fierce.
"To think,” grumbled the struggling
author, "that I can’t get any one to
publish my novel after all the pains I
took with it.”
"But,” replied the critic, “if it were
published, think of all the pains you
give.”
Sure to Find It.
Bosh—I knew a man once who had
never met with a disappointment in
his life.
Josh—How was that?
Bosh—He was never looking for
an> thing but trouble.—Detroit Free
Press.
One on Pa.
“Pa!”
“Well, what is it now?”
“My teacher says I’m a natural born
fool.”
“Your teacher is a sensible woman
and that is what I’ve always said. I
suppose she had to explain to you
what a natural born fool was?”
“Yes, pa. She said it was heredi
tary.”
The Lacking Ingredient.
“Yes,” said the enthusiastic pro
moter, “we have enormous mineral de
posits on this land. All we need for
its development is a little money.”
“My friend,” answered Col. Still
well, “you remind me of a neighbor
out my way who used to think he
almost had a julep because he was in
possession of a mint bed and a
spring.”
Strange to the Country.
Farmer Skinner (who takes in sum
mer boarders)—I wuz jest a-readin’
about that Californy wizard, Burbank,
an’ b’gosh, he kin cert’nly do wonders
in growin’ strange kinds uv veger
tibles.
The Bravest Boarder—Has he suc
ceeded in producing canless peas or
unpreserved tomatoes?—Puck.
When the Train Starts.
Sweltering Stranger (at Cactus
Crossing)—When on earth does the
next train leave this sun-baked, hea
ven-forsaken region?
Ilkali Ike—Waal, stranger, we has
each got a right to his opinion on thet
subjek, but them thet knows declars
it hikes out jest after the enjine.
“5
Judicial Verdict.
Judge—You are accused of beating
this person cruelly.
The Accused—Well, I had to beat
him to make him do his work. He is
an idiot.
Judge (severely)—You should re
member that an idiot is a man like
you or me.—Les Annales.
-
So to Speak.
First Lawyer—Are you going to de
fend Jimmison?
Second Lawyer—No. He hasn’t a
good case.
First Lawyer—Why, I thought it
would be easy.
Second Lawyer—No, it’s not—er—
fees-ible.
The Benefit of Contrast.
“Do you think that industry is es
sential to happiness?”
“A little is,” answered the easy
going person. “If a man had never
done any work he would never real
ize how much comfort there is in
having none to do.”
A Caustic Critic.
“There is no doubt in my mind that
Hamlet was perfectly sane.”
“Yes,” answered Stormington
Barnes. “Hamlet was all right men
tally. But I wouldn't say as much for <
some of the actors who think they
can play the part.”
Revised Version.
Mrs. Clubhouse—“Mrs. Upperten is
looking thin and worried of late.”
Mrs. Strongmind—“Yes. Do you
know, I think she is roosterpecked.”
Desperate Case.
“Mrs. Bizzie’s husband should take
the Keeley cure.”
“Nothing but a divorce would ever
cure him of drunkeness.”
HE LOST HIM.
“Did Hardup ever hear from that millionaire uncle of his who made a
fortune out West?”
“No; his uncle heard from him first.”
Success Is Different.
Polk—When a fellow starts to do
anything he can always succeed if he
only sticks to it.
Jolk—Not always. How about when
you start to remove a sheet of sticky
fly paper that you’ve sat down on?
Half the Pleasure.
"Did you have a good time at the
picnic, Bubby?”
“No’ra; paw an’ maw went—an’ I
didn’t have nobody t’ tell nuthin’ to
when I got home.”—Puck.
The Trouble.
“I tell you there is nothing like trav
eling tcrtake the conceit out of a man.
It surely took it out of me.”
‘ True. But the deuce of it is that
the coming back always puts more of
it in.”—Detroit Tribune.
Too Much to Expect.
“Poetry,” said the editor, “is a drug
on the’market.”
“Oh, indeed,” exclaimed the poet
hopefully. “Am I to infer that you
pay drug store pripes for it?’
Necessary Modifications.
Knox—‘ Why don't you cut that out?
Tone your talk down a bit"
Kandor “Well, It's all right to call
a spade a spade, isn’t It?"
Knox—"Instead of calling It you
might whisper it occasionally."
Though It Was Personal.
Young Man (on entering restau
rant) Have you calves brains?
Waitress—Quit your kiddin. An
other fellow was in this morning and
asked me if I had frogs' legs.
An Ordinary Mortal.
“Engaged? Why, he seemed quite
broken-hearted when the other girl rl
fused him." 81 re*
“Well, he’s like the average
It wasn’t long before he was looking
for a consolation prize.” k ng
Many Men Do.
“Jonea says he never lets the sun
go down upon his wrath ”
"No; he expends it all on his wif«
as soon as he gets home from thT*?
lice.”—Houston Chronicle th °r*