r JOHN BURT !By' FREDERICK UPHAM ADAMS ,|Autkor4otsr SZP.'iaaao. sziscr a.\' jyWD 77D 7720 Rounds, assuming an easy attitude it ihe aisle, “I don’t suppose there's an> one in this honorable body likes money better’n I do. When I began to make money tradin’ in hosses back in Massachusetts it was like pourin’ kerosene oil on a red-hot stove. The more I got the more I wanted, an’ as some of you know I’ve done pretty tairly middlin’ well.” Sam Rounds reached out and picked a small package from the table and looked at it longingly. Alderman Hen dricks turned in his chair and gazed uneasily at the speaker. There was something in his manner which caused a hush to fall on the assembly. “Mr. Chairman,” said Alderman Rounds, slowly unwrapping the pack age as he continued, “money is the greatest argument in the world. Logic is a fine thing, but money beats logic I admire the man who has the gift of eloquence, like my honorable col league from my ward, but money can give eloquence a handicap an’ beat it every time. Money—” “Mr. Chairman,” interrupted Alder man Hendricks, “we desire to proceed with this vote—much as we are charmed by my colleague’s trite re flections about money as an abstract proposition. The question before the board is the disposition of these ordi nances. I demand that the alderman record his vote.” “Alderman Rounds has the floor,’ decided the chairman. “Thank you,* I’ll not take up much of your time,” said Sam Rounds. “As I was sayin’, I’m uncommonly fond 01 money, an’ when the president of the Cosmopolitan Improvement compan> came to my place of business an said he would pay me ten thousand dollars for my vote in favor of thesq ordinances, I just went plumb off my center, an’ told him I would consider ;t. I couldn’t see anything else in the world but that figure ‘one’ with four ciphers after it, an’ a dollar mark in front of it. Mr. Chairman, you nevei had to work hard or trade for a livin’ an’ you can’t realize how I felt wher . he placed this here package in mj hand." Sam tore away the wrapping anc disclosed a layer of crisp banknotes 1 Every eye in the room was fixed or the speaker as he stepped forward and laid them on the chairman’s table > Dazed and demoralized, no member o) the opposition dared interrupt. (To be continued.) A Case of Conscience. “You see, dot new clerk vhas rec j ommended to me ash a sharp feller,’ said the dealer in second-hand cloth | ing, "und so I takes a $10 coat cut ol stock und slips oafer to my friend Schmidt und asks him to send his boy to der store mit it. Der boys goes along mit a pitiful face and asks how much?’’ '* ‘Two dollar,’ says my new clerk. “ ‘But it vhas a new coat and be longs to my fadder.’ “ ‘Vhere vas your fadder?’ “ ‘He goes by state’s prison for fife years.’ “‘Den I only pay $1.50 for dot coat.’ “ ‘For why?’ “ ‘Because of your fadder’s feel ings. Suppose der Governor come tc wisit dot prison some day und haf dir. ; coat on his back? Shust see youi \ fauder’s feelings vhen dey shake hand together und vhas like old frendts.’ “ ‘But w-on’t fadder feel shust ash bad for $1.50 ash for $2?’ asks dei boy. ‘ “ ‘He may, my son,’ says der new clerk, ‘but I get 25 per cent off my conscience by changing der buttons.’ ’’ Mr. Hillyer’s Burglar Alarm. Mr. Hillyer was a heavy sleeper He was a man, also, with a chronic fear of burglars. It was these twc things that led him to have the win dow of his sleeping room equipped with a burglar alarm of the latest and most approved description. A few mornings after the device had been installed he came down tc breakfast with a grin on his face. “I had a funny dream last night,’ he said. “I dreamed that a burglai raised my window and the alarm went off, but he didn’t seem to mind it. He rumaged the bureau drawers, fount my watch and pocketbook and slippec out the way he came in. By the way,’ he added, “I forgot to bring down my watch and pocketbook. I’ll go ano get them.” He went upstairs and returned in a moment with an entirely different look on his face. The watch and pocket book were gone. It had not been a dream.—Youth’s Companion. When His Head Swelled. As illustrative of the exhilarating ef fects of liquor, Alderman Hammond Odell tells the story of a switchman who took a drink and felt that he ought to be section boss. He took an ether and said, "I ought to be a divi sion superintendent.” He took two or three more and felt that he ought tc he general manager of the railroad Then he took two or three more and thought he should be president of the. road. In a few minutes the fast express was approaching. The switchmai. raised aloft his red lamp and brought the train came to a standstill. "What is the trouble?” inquired the conductor. The switchman slowly pulled out his watch and said, “You are two minutes late. Don’t let this happen again.” The College Boy Chaffeur. A new occupation for the self-sup porting college boy during the sum mer vacation has come in with the automobile. Good chaffeurs are in de mand and the automobile enthusiast requires a chaffeur for every make oi machine In his possession. The daughter of a New York -multi millionaire owns fourteen automobiles lrom light runabouts to touring cars and has eight chaffeurs in her employ Self-supporting college men whe have taken time during the year tc make a study of automobiles have m trouble in securing positions. HOW TO BEAUTIFY THE HOME SURROUNDINGS HT"9' Even an ordinary suburban villa, erected in the stiff, stereotyped style approved by the modern Guilder—in accord with his conception of fitness and economy—even a tiny, box-like edifice composed of crude red bricks and glaring paint, may be beautified by planting around it many creeping plants, and changed into a little nest of foliage, recalling to the wearied eyes of town workers \ isions of country cottages and village life. A covering of trailing greenery will do marvels to soften down the violent red of new bricks, transforming a The Tool Shed, house which is a veritable eyesore both in shape and coloring, into a bower of leaves and blossoms. Virginian creeper deserves the first mention on the list, for it will grow anywhere, and it climbs so quickly that it is worthy of particular recom mendation, especially to all dwellers in towns, where every bit of fresh growing green is welcome. Late in autumn it becomes a mass of glorious coloring, its leaves turning every shade from brilliant crimson to glowing rus set and gold. Other excellent climbers are the Clematis Montana and the winter jas mine; the latter, with its pretty yel low flowers, is a great favorite. There are several varieties of clematis which do well outside a town, particularly if the spot be sheltered in winter. The blue Jackmanii is known to every one, and the white variety, with its star like blossoms, is justly popular. The latter is particularly effective when grown in proximity to the crimson rambler rose. There is a pale blue cle matis—Lady Bovill—which is very pretty, but more difficult to rear, re quiring some care and attention. Two good climbing roses are the Gloire de Dijon and William Allen Richardson; the former is hardy, and will thrive even in a northern or east ern aspect, but the latter should be planted on a south or west wall, where it will get plenty of sun. Its lovely Another Device for Concealing An Unsightly Corner. yeiiow ana orange mossoms contrast admirably with the purple or blue flow ers of the clematis. For porches and lattice work there Is nothing sweeter than our old friend the honeysuckle, and beside it the ja ponica; and for concealing ugly walls Boston ivy grows quickly and has small but very pretty leaves. And here I would draw particular attention to the untidy rubbish heaps and ugly little outhouses for garden ing tools, which so often completely disfigure an otherwise trim and well kept garden. With a little ingenuity these blemishes might easily be reme died and turned into quite pretty ob jects. The designs given here may probably be of considerable assistance to those who may wish to devise some means of concealing these blots. A small potting shed is often essential, and in it the garden roller aqd other tools can be kept safe from damp or other injury. By meaDs of some rough shelves and pockets, improvised at the sides and above the door for holding plants (according to Fig. 1) the whole appearance of the shed will be altered. A few pretty geraniums—the ivy leaves pink creepers grow quickly and flower well—some pots of nasturtiums of various colors, with mignonette, lobelias, and marguerites should make an effective show, and will require very little attention beyond watering in dry weather. In Figs. 2 and 3 will be found sug gestions for screening off dust bins, cinder heaps, or any other disfiguring excrescence near the back door or side entrance, which, owing to its proxim ity to the garden, would be painfully apparent to any one there. Trellis work made of thin laths of wood ac cording to these designs, and painted green, could be covered with trained For Screening Off the Oust Bin, Etc ; creepers which would soon effectually screen off the offending objects. It is important that these leafy screens should be evergreen. I would suggest that ivy should be planted in the bor ders beneath to act as a permanent background in winter; and the trellis work may be beautified in summer by growing some strong plants of hops, which are most decorative when cov ered with their grace tassels of green ish-colored bloom. Amongst numerous other climbers which can be raised by seed for cov ering palisades or wire fencing, 1 would recommend the Convolvulus Major, which blooms with every hue | the orange-flowered Eccremocarpus i Scaber, and the scarlet Tropoeolum Lobbianum—besides the high-growing ; nasturtium with its varied blooms i The planting and training of all these pretty climbing plants will entail nc hard work, only a little daily atten tion and care while they are young and this should be a labor of love tc those whose tastes are artistic and who like to surround themselves with all things beautiful.—Montreal Her aid. . "LARNIN* ” OF LESSER VALUE. irishman’s Story Showed It Is the Brains that Count. “When I was in Cork last," said Ckauneey Olcott, “I got acquainted v/ith one of those really good story tellers who have helped make Ireland famous. Some incident came up in the local courts which brought out the following: “ ‘Ah, it isn’t always the lamin’ that counts in a man. If the brains are in him they’ll work without trainin’, though maybe a little touchin’ up doesn’t hurt. “ ‘Now, there was me ould fri’nd Tom Sullivan, who med piles iv money on horse dealin’ in Cork’s own town an’ was Magisthrate a’ all, though he couldn’t tell his own name if he saw it in writin’. Well, I mind the day Sergt. Darcy brought Pete Garvey up before Tom for bein’ drunk and dis orderly in the public streets”—as they say. Now Darcy was a bit of a bog Latin scholar, and, thinkin’ to flus trate Tom, he put the case this way: ‘ Pete Garvey in hoc signum stagger um your Wprshippum.” “ ‘Tom looked bothered for a minit and scratched his poll. Then, with one of thim sudden jerks of his, he pointed to Garvey and thundered out: “ * “In hoc finum bobissimum peeler um,” and I declare he had to explain 10 thim reporter fellows who write books every day that Garvey was fined a bob, or a shillin’ if ye like, for bein’ drunk and disorderly. Oh, it’s the brains, not the lamin’, that counts.’ ” —New York Times. Chinese and Manchuria. A correspondent in the London Times says that the Chinese care nothing for the provinces of Manchu ria. They form no part of the eight een provinces which fill the Chinese conception of his native land, though they gave birth to the ruling dynasty. This indifference may be real and may account for the ease with which the Russians have overrun the coun try; yet Manchuria is worth fighting for. _ Spain Bears No Malice. Don Emilio De Ojeda, the Spanish minister, who has just returned to Washington from a five months’ visit to his old home in Madrid, says that tke Spanish people do not bear the slightest enmity against America, and that the development of Spain’s re sources is going on at a wonderful rate. Faithful Service Rewarded. After forty years of service as sex ton of Grace church, on Brooklyn Heights, Willian McKnight has re signed. The church has voted him a pen lien lm ~'£\ HE’D LULL THEM TO SLEEP. Visionary Had Great Scheme for Use On Pullman Cars. One of the oddest ideas developed recently was discovered by a man who had advertised for opportunities for investment. One of the answers merely asked for an interview, stat ing that the idea was too valuable to be communicated by mail. It was a straightforward business communica tion and an appointment was made, which was kept by a man who might have been *a lawyer or a broker, so far as outward appearances were con cerned. Only when he began to talk did it become apparent that he be longed to the army of visionaries. He found, he explained, that only a small percentage of those who trav eled in sleeping cars were able to obtain rest, owing to the roar and rat tle of the train. His invention was designed to overcome this difficulty. It was his plan to have small tubes installed along the sides of the cars below and above the windows. A slight opening at each end of the berths would enable one to plug in an earpiece similar to those used in pho nographs, and thus exchange for the rattle of the trucks soft music to lull them to sleep. One phonograph, he explained, would supply the entire Car, and a slight extra charge might be made for the use of the tubes. For the cost of the patent he was willing to let anyone come in for a half interest, and he was much sur prised when this generous ofTer was declined. Oldest Brown Graduate. Rev. William Lawton Brown, the oldest living graduate of Brown uni versity, has turned his ninetieth year. He is a resident of Wrentham, Mass., where he lives with a daughter in a coxy home. His first pastorate was in Ann Arbor, Mich., to which place he came in 1836. There is only one other living member of his class, William H. Potter of North Kingston,’ R. I. Mias Anthony’s Valuable Gift. Miss Susan B. Anthony’s gift to the congressional library at Washington of several thousand letters from near ly all the noted men of the last half century is greatly appreciated. The gift also includes a unique collection of newspapers, which, with the let ters, form a complete history of the changes of the last sixty years with regard to the,cause of women. Oldest Postal Employe. John D. Strassburg began work in the Louisville postoffice in 1843, and is srid to be the oldest postal employe in the United States. He never has been promoted. 4S A TREACHEROUS ANIMAL. i 4lack Panther of Africa More Ferocr ous than the Bengal Tiger. , Of all the big, dangerous cats, none Is more unapproachable and more treacherous than the black panther. I Hailing from the heart of the deep est African jungle, lithe and supple of body, alert and nervous, this stealthy marauder exceeds in ferocity even a Bengal tiger. He is the only big feline that the lion trainer does not venture to train; and he is the only cat so absolutely distrustful that he shuns even the light of day. Often he will lie all day long in a dusky corner of his cage, his yellow slit eyes shifting and gleaming rest lessly. Even the feeding hour, when j pandemonium breaks loose among the oig cages, when hungry roars and squeals mingle with impatient snarls and impacts of heavy bodies against steel bars, is apt to have no effect on him. He may lie eyeing his chunk of raw beef suspiciously, and not ven ture forth until day has waned and the last visitor has left; to tear meat from bones with his long, white fangs. In fact, so ugly and vicious is this beast, that, frequently he turns on his own kind, and in many instances it is impossible to cage him, even with a mate.—McClure’s Magazine. The Departed. The departed! the departed! They visit us in dreams. .^nd they glide above our memories, Like shadows over streams; But where the cheerful lights of home In constant luster burn. The departed, the departed, Can never more return! The good the brave, the beautiful. How dreamless is their sleep. Where rolls the dirgelike music Of the ever-tossing deep! Or where the surging night winds Pale winter’s robes have spread Above the narrow palaces. In the cities of the dead! I look around, and feel the awe Of one who walks alone. Among the wrecks of former days. In mournful ruin strown; I start to hear the stirring sounds Among the cypress trees. For the voice of the departed Is borne upon the breeze. That solemn voice! It mingles with Each free and careless strain; I scarce can think earth’s minstrelsy Will cheer my heart again. The melody of summer waves. The thrilling notes of birds, Can never be so dear to me As their remember’d words. I sometimes dream their pleasant smiles Still on me sweetly fall. Their tones of love I faintly hear My name in sadness call. I know that they are happy. With their angel Dlumage on. But my heart is rery1* desolate To think that they are gone. —Park Benjamin. A Fund of Humor. William Winter, the dramatic critic, is thought by some to write the worst hand of any man living. There may have been giants in the past, men like Horace Greeley, who surpassed him, but no one his equal remains. Some years ago Mr. Winter was traveling in Scotland, and having had many amusing experiences, wrote an account of them to R. H. Stoddard, in New York. Mr. Stoddard received the letter at breakfast and, combin ing familiarity with the intuitions oi the poet, managed to make it out, and enjoyed several good laughs. He glanced up at Mrs. Stoddard and said; ’’It's from William Winter. Very funny. Want to read it?” ‘'You know I can never read a word of his writing,” answered Mrs. Stod dard. “Oh, that doesn’t matter,” replied Mr. Stoddard, tossing the letter over; “it’s just as funny to look at!” Why He Was Called Literary. John D. Rockefeller. Jr., is a great reader of modern novels. Recently, it will be remembered, he regaled his Bible class with a series of excerpts from G. H. Lorimer's “Letters From a Self-Made Merchant to His Son.” More recently still Mr. Rockefeller en tertained for several days one of the best known of American novelists. This novelist has the habit of leav ing books and papers lying around him in great confusion, and one day Mr. Rockefeller overheard a maid servant comment upon hjs friend’s carelessness somewhat humorously. “The gentleman is literary, is he?” said the maid. “Well, I suppose they call him that because he is always making a litter.”—Boston Post. Mark Twain's Answer. Mark Twain received a letter from New Zealand the other day, in which a small correspondent, in the midst of the enthusiasm of the days of Tom Sawyer and Huck Finn, asked him plaintively if his name really was Clemens. It probably was not, as Clemens was the man who sold pat ent medicnes in Wellington, and, be sides, the writer was fond of the name Mark—was there not a Mark Anthony in the Bible? The humorist was immensely pleased with the whole thing, and sent out an answer that may yet be come an heirloom in the New Zea land family. And one of the things he said was: “As Mark Antony has got into the Bible, I am not without hopes myself.” Immense Coil of Rope. The largest coil of rope ever seen in this city has been made for a tow iine for the big raft of piling collect ed by the Oregon Rafting company, which is to be towed to San Fran cisco by the steamer Francis Leggett, now taking in her cargo of lumber at (nman & Poulson’s mills. The huge coil contains 150 fathoms of cable four and three-quarter Inches in di ameter, weighs a little over three tons and costs in the neighborhood of $1, )00. It needs to be stout and strong and perfect in every fiber, for the -aft to be towed contains 650,000 lin ear feet of piling, equal to 6,500,000 'eet. lumber measure.—Portland Ore gonian. Shoes for a Giant. A Calumet shoemaker has just fin ished a pair of shoes for Louis Mol icnen, known as the "Quincy Hill giant.” Mollenen is 19 years old, ?tanas seven feet eight inches in aeight and tips the scales at 300 pounds. The shoes are sixteen and u quarter inches in length, six inches i‘. width and weigh five pounds each. M'.'.lenen will use them while at work >n tne Quincy mine, where he Is em ployed. A number of offers to exhibit the young giant have been made by showmen, but all have been refused.— Chicago Recor 1-Herald. Landlord Well Supplied. The young man suffering from over study arrived at the resort ii the “lonely mountains.’’ “Ten dollars per day?” he gasped, reading the rates over the desk. “Certainly, sir,” responded the suave proprietor. “I hope you win understand that this is a nerve sana torium.” "I should say it is, and you have the most nerve of all.” Equal to Emergency. The Collector—What! Mr. Owing hot in! Why, there he is, before my very eyes! The Office Kid—Aw—wot! That ain’t the old man. He's out! That's only his shadow!—Jester. Had the Bird Beaten. ‘ They say your uncle, who has just come home from* the army, is terribly addicted to swearing. Is that true?'’ “Well, you know how our parrot would swear?” “Yes.” “When Uncle Henry first came here he made a few remarks near the bird, and it came over toward him and said: ‘Say, you better get fn this cage. I’ve lost my job.’ ” Hia Title There. “My wife and I are going to spend the summer with her people at Strong’s Corners,” said the meek, lit tle man, “and I want you to mail your yaper to me.” “Yes,” said the clerk; “what’s your aame?” “Well—er—to make sure, I guess /ou’d better address it ‘Mary Strong's Husband, Strong’s Cornets.’ ’’ Regular Custom. “Did you follow my advice abd send your ‘mint-julep’ poem to the editor of that Kentucky magazine?’’ ’Yes; and he took it." “Of course he did. Didn’t I tell you no true Kentuckian would decline a mint julep?” “That’s all right; but he paid me only 15 cents for it.”—Judge. Not Quite Certain. Gilroy—Parsons is a liberal sort of fellow. He offered me a cigar just now'.” Butman—You didn’t take it? Gilroy—No. Butman—Then how do you know whether it was liberality or merely malice?—Boston Transcript. Natural Deduction. • Attorney—What do you do during the week? Witness—Nothing. Attorney—And on Sunday? Witness—I take a day off. Attorney—How long have you bad a political job? His Secret. Raphael was explaining his fame. “It was easy,” he confessed. “I sim ply told every woman on the block that I had painted my cherubs from hers.” Bitterly he regretted he had wasted his talents on art instead of’ shining !n politics.—Harper’s Bazar. A Misslip. r** ■ ■" .. -_ Mistah Jackson (at the cakewalk) —Look heah, niggah. doan’ yo* laugh it me; doan’ yo’ laugh at me! Mistah Johnson—I ain’t laughin’; ny face jes’ slipped! The Reader. Rieder—I suppose I’m a blockhead, out I must confess I don’t like Henry lames’s novels. Crittock—You may not be a block* lead at that. The people who don’t 'ike his novels are divided into two Masses—those who don’t understand llm and those who do.—Philadelphia Press. Hard Work Ahead. “Where are you bound now?” asked Psyche of Cupid. “The Atlantic coast resorts,” replied 3upid. "But where are your bow and ar rows?” “Oh, I have to use a machine gun Aere. It’s gone on ahead of me. Why He Tarried. Harold—You shouldn’t wait for something to turn up, old chap; you should pitch right in /nd turn it up yourself. Rupert—But it’s my rich uncle's toes, old chap, that I’m waiting for.— New York News. Paradoxical. “That child seems to be spoiled.” “He is not spoiled. He’s entirely ?oo fresh.”