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About The Loup City northwestern. (Loup City, Neb.) 189?-1917 | View Entire Issue (Aug. 28, 1903)
Leup City Northwestern GEO. E. BENSCHOTCR, Ed. a.id Pub. LOUP CITY, - - NEBRASKA. Harry Lehr should be careful or ha Pill sprain bis wrist. Milwaukee has taken to golf. What Is the matter Pith penuehle? Women may live longer than men, hut do they jive as much while they are at it? They are lawyers, not dentists, mind you. who are going into the Sawtooth mountains. The philanthropist is still undiscov ered who gives his money back to the people be got It from. That she may be In still finer fettle to fight for peace, Russia orders an other bunch of warships. Diamonds have gone up 20 per cent In price this year. This Is a sympa thetic strike of another kind. • Russell Sage is 88, but those who tried to take money away from him report that he is not childish. A Berlin physician makes the claim that arsenic will cure cancer. If taken In large enough doses It will. Lott Dillon is a terribly fast young thing, but there is still quite a gap between her and the two minute mark. The matter of preserving seal life in Bering sea has very appropriately been referred to a high joint commis sion. Your dollar will buy a reserved seat at the circus Just as quick as John Rockefeller's dollar. But he‘ has the dollar. In time the name of the man that made the arctic fox flea famous will be forgotten, but the fame of the flea will abide. A mackerel weighing 800 pounds has been caught off Newport. Trying to keep up with the size of the jags in that vicinity. The chewing gum trust has a sur plus, after paying dividends, of $776, 000. The new* has set a great man? other jaws wagging. It must make the women golfers of Halifax feel like swearing to have that Halifax clergyman accuse them of swearing on the links. It appears that the New York fruit handlers are engaged in a banana war They certainly have their troubles bunched to begin with. Lilliam Russell has an automobile adventure every little while now. The automobile is apparently taking the place of the lost jewels. Spine real distress, nevertheless, has been caused by the slump In stocks. It has cut a lot of promising stimmer vacations in half. When you learn that those cigars you have been buying so cheaply w'ere smuggled you wonder, with some in dignation, why they were not sold still cheaper. The debts of Alexander and Braga are $80,000. They will now be paid. Perhaps the massacre was not a mat ter of politics after all. It was very businesslike. Presently the orator who wants to make a hit will refer to the boys not as the future governors and Presidents but the future farm hands of our glorious country. It is reported that Andrew Carnegie thinks of starting a newspaper in (Jlasgow. This is the first intimation we have had that Andrew also hank ers for strenuosity. The latest system of wireless teleg raphy is also poleless. Unhappily this fact does not mark progress, so far as the message senders are concerned, toward the costless. That. Philadelphia grocer who was found selling green tomatoes which he had painted red must be aspiring to a place in history side by side with jhe man who invented wooden nut megs. There is a girl in Chicago who has worked thirty-one years for the same family. Why should a girl like that have to work tor a living? She ought to be able to get big money from the museums. ‘ The bos Angeles Herald says that the new twenty-two-story building of the New York Times will be equipped with a special private stairway for poetical contributors. Why not use the elevator shaft and save time? "Fighting Bob” Evans has been re ceived in the throne room by the em ppror and empress of (bins, but the chances are good that he would rather be traveling around with Prince Henry, or off Sandy Hook keeping the course clear for the racing yachts, not to mention commanding the Iowa in the battle of Santiago. ft Is awful the way social duties are telling on people at Newport. Some of them hare to get up as early as 9 and 10 o'clock In the morning to keep up with their engagement*. _ CUPOLA. SKETCHED Ay BYPON WLUAT15 THE WILD ROSE. Oh, a wild rose bloomer) In a fair retreat Where aephyrs gently blew. Flooding the nook with her Incense sweet— ' QLeen of a scented crew. Rut coyest of all was this wild rose uueen. With her dainty petals fair, When the west wind came with his woo ing keen A true love to declare. And day by day through the springtime fleet. He sought In lover’s mood To lay his heart at the rose's feet Near the border of the wood. Thus in sun and shade did the west wind flee To preserve his courting sway. While the wild rose bloomed to matu rity And loved In her rosy way. Ah! she gave herself to the atnTous wind. As he sped the west land down: And the bold groom blew the rose away To the rolling fields of brown. He kissed her cheeks in a merry race Throughout the livelong day. But at dusk he tired of her fragile face And carelessly sped away! fnlo the clods of a serried field She fell with fragrance spent. But the west wind never a sigh did yield For the flower innocent. In the chilling field, all torn and rife. The wild rose drooped and died. But the angels wrote in the Book of Life Of a floweret sanctified! Newspapers are all right In their way, but the trouble with the great THE LOCAL NEWS. Journals of intelligence Is that they do not give the local news. In fact, it if only over the back yard fences of this eventful and excitement pro ducing country that news is news. The newspaper reporter smart enough to play eavesdropper to back alley con fidences, will copper to enough news to make his paper famous in two Is sues. Of course, he must take his own chances on enduring to enjoy the fruits of his labors, but living he will have only again demonstrated his ex traordinary ability. TOti KNOW HIM. From morn HU night, despite the law, The hose plays on the grass; It waters ^everything in sight, including thoge who pass. From endless stream it spurteth wild. With not a curb or calk; It showers etery one who dares To tread upon the walk! Pedestrians are drenched and wet. From dainty toe to wig A has! the man that wets us all With his old sprinkling rig! n? ADVICE TO NEWSPAPER MEN. (treat care should be exerted in choosing your country correspondents, for much depends on whether or no the rural Journalist writes on both "ABOl T TO DROP A LINK, sides of the paper. It Is aiao advisable to choose as correspondents those farmers who are nol*d for their lib eral Sunday dinners. Herewith we present a typical correspondent “about to drop a line.” At an Indian wedding in Oklahoma recently the bride wore pink silk foulard with pink ribbon sash, blue collar and cuffs, black hat with yel low and lavender trimmings, a green veil and black gloves. The groom wore the customary black minus his coat, the day being warm. Hiawatha and John are still some degrees re mote from entrance into 400-society. NOTICE. Employes of this print shop who wipe on the office towel are hereby notified So wash first. We have posi tive proof that the devil and the roller boy have been using this aid to civil ization with an entire abandonment of all rules and regulations of the of fice chapel. Unless such uncleanly habits are rectified at once, this towel will not be washed next Christmas, as THE TOWEL BEAUTIFUL, customary. There is no use trying to keep toilet articles clean when the simple annals of cleanliness are abused by certain members of the force. P. S. Too. will the young lady typos please clean the office comb of long hairs after using It. This will be ap preciated heartily by the married men of the office. P. Scribblitis, ” Priwilly i* a pretty maid. " "Indeed she is quite" "stunning/ And when ” "she sweeps along the" " rurb.the chappy bovs " " comes running. Pris- " •' ittlltZtll ” "rilly'* pa gave her a " " purse to buy some" " i x t ; x nut " " needfuls trifling. Then " ** *Cilly to the nty went " " and there began her rifl- " " i n g . She traded" "here and traded" " theie. and shopped to suit " " her fancy. Then home- " "ward she did swiftly fly " " to show her dear Aunt " " Nancy. Aunt Nancy " "gasped in" "sad alarm," " at dear Prisrilly " "shocking. She" " i t 111 11 " " ttttxt " " bad a hundred pairs " " like this here peek - a - boo " "stitch stocking. The Moral—** " Gentlemen should not rubber. * " Ladies never dc. " One Samuel Tilden, of Brooklyn, knows where there is a cave full ol treasure; that is. he gives his word. According to Sara, the wealth lies buried on one of the islands of the Tahltan group. He seeks a capitalist to join him in an expedition. Any reader of “Cupola Sketches’* who de sires to get rich quickly and who ha* sufficient means to back up his desire* may communicate with Samuel with out first paying for this adv. S 5 A RUDE SHOCK. In the river, at 'The Point," Forty kids are splashing. Sun upon their reddened bucks In tne daylight hashing. Round the bend the boarders come, To the boat-house flocking— Malden's gasp? The modest faint! Oh, how awful shocking Then from out a boyish' throat. In a voice of thunder. Comes one stern, affrighted cry— "Hully chee, duck tinder'” •mr.N YE. JEREMIAM. CAINT Y» REASON NONE?” Little words of reason Spoken to a mule. Oft wilt curb his anger And his passion cool. Hut 'tls well to argue At a Jasack's head— Saves a heap o' huntin' For the long lost dead! 5 } 3 indigestion is the cause of three fourths of the marital troubles In th« country. The wife hands the husband apple dumplings that won’t digest, and 1 he hands tack nettlesome words Then she hands him the broomstick the lawyers get their hands in and thi court hands one or the other a di vorce. Moral—Young women should learn to cook. IN CIUDAD BOLIVAR NOT AN IDEAL SPOT FOR THE NERVOUS INDIVIDUAL. Inhabitants of Venezuelan Town He-' er at a Loss for Excitement—Every House Easily Turned into a Fortress Ciudad Bolivar, the scene of the Venezuelan revolutionists' last stand ..gainst Castro's army, is an exciting I place to live in, even at the best of limes. "It is a semi-civilized spot on the verge of the unknown jungle," said a New Yorker, who has been there. "I was condemned for my sins, to spend a week there shortly before the town fell into the hands of the revolution ists last year. "I noticed that if anybody went out after dark he always stuck his revolv er in his belt, and I was warned by several friendly citizens not to stay out late in the streets unless 1 wished to be held up and pernaps murdered. "It was a paradise for the adventur ous. One day I saw a rum-shop keeper chase the local barber down the street with a loaded pistol in one hand and a machete in the other. I offered up a prayer for the tonsorial artist, be cause I had no razor and he was the only one. Luckily he escaped. "The trouble was about an overdue account. The purveyor of liquid joy was simply trying to collect his money according to the approved local cus tom. “Another day an imprisoned revolu tionist escaped from the cuartel, or barracks, and a couple of soldiers ran out to stop him with bullets. He got one in the leg and pulled up howling. The people thought the revolutionists had come, so in a trice shops were shut, doors bolted, and everybody dis appeared off the streets like magic. "The doors and shutters of the mer chants’ stores are made of sheet iron. When they are closed the stores be come veritable fortresses. "Most of the private houses are sim ilarly protected, and have little grilles through which the inmates can spy out to see whether visitors are ene mies or friends. Truly, a soothing place for a nervous man to live in. “When the shots were fired at the runaway I happened to be in the Brit ish consulate, spinning yarns with the Vice-Consul. Immediately he heard the shots he locked his safe, the clerk shut and barred the steel doors, and then we got our revolvers and went out on the balcony to see the fun. But it was all over in a moment, and the l»oor,wounded wretch was dragged roughly along the street back to the cuartel. "Ciudad Bolivar is probably the hot test place on earth. It is built on sol id black rock which retains the day’s heat far into the night, so there is practically no respite. New York's re cent heat wave would have been wel comed as a cool spell by the inhabi-' tants of the Orinoco hades. "All day long one is plagued by myr iads of mosquitoes more aggressive, even, than those which have made New Jersey famous; and at night bat talions of frogs croak horridly and murder sleep. “The walls of the houses are badly pitted with bullet markg—-grim relics of former revolutions—and many are in ruins. Ciudad Bolivar has often been a battlefield before to-day. “The streets are unpaved, and in the center of each there i& a green, stagnant ditch. Where stre-ts inter sect, a plank is thrown across to bridge these ditches. “There are no vehicles, and indeed very little civilization of any kind. The place is always swarming with nickel plated generals and bandit soldiers, who fatten on the unfortunate inhab itants, sip aguadiente, smoke their eternal brown cigarettes and discuss the glorious victories they are going to win."—New York Sun. The Oldest Ship in the World. The time was when American ships carried a broom at the masthead (fol lowing the custom of the Dutch) as a sign that America swept the seas, writes Broughton Brandenburg in Les lie's. In those days fine shipbuilding timber grew right down to the shore of the Atlantic coast, and there was hardly a bay on the >»’w England shore where there was not a ship building yard. So it happens that most of the old sailing ships are built of American or Norwegian timber. I have seen hundreds of old Fquare riggers roaming the world under strange flags whose every stick grew on American soil. Ships built of Es sex oak are famous for their iogevity. The oldest ship in the world, the mail schooner Vigilant, running into St. Croix, French West indies*’is now un der the French flag, but was built, so I have been told, in 1802. of Essex oak at Essex, Mass., and was long un der the Stars and Stripes. All They Could Raise. The old colored man was wading about his inundated farm in the flood district. "Look hero, boss." he said, rubbing bis brow. “(Jo nature make eberytbing to suit its surrenndin's?” 1 suppose so. Uncle Thad,” replied the tourist. "Why?" "Nuthin' much, only I was thlnkin' det nature should liab supplied de peoplq down lirah wid eq appetite foil watah lilies." New Nitrate Field. The nitrate of soda, the important element in fertilizers, in sight in the recently discovered deposits in the Mojave desert. California, is said to lie more than 20,000,000 tons. Hither to the only nitrate beds known were those on the rainless coast of Chile. PLAYED DEAF AND DUMB. But Even Then the Lawyer Did Not Get Silent SNMfe “Experiments don’t alwnys terminate ■ r expected," said a Nassau street law yer. “This morning I went to a strange barber shop, and for the pur pose of heading off conversation I played deaf and dumb. As I entered I put my fingers to work and went through the motion of shaving with an affirmative shake of the head; gave the negative shake as I made ihe hair cutting motions, shampooing gestures, shoeblacking actions and. application of hair tonic passes. “Two idle barbers bowed in recog nition of understanding me, and took positions at their chairs, waiting for me to makte my selection, which I did by dropping into the first one. “ ‘That fellow looks daffy as well as dumb,’ said the barber who wasn't putting soap in my mouth. “ ‘I guess he’s all night,* answered the one who was rubbing in all the lather on one spot. ‘These dummies always do act queer.’ “ ‘I bet he is too mean to give you a tip.’ “ ‘He looks it,’ answered the shaver. ‘He will be a bald headed lobster in side of six months. It looks as though his wife had been playing ping-pong on his bead.’ “ ‘Sell him some hair tonic,’ replied the other. 'I will write and ask him if he wants it.’ •'Til be hanged if you do!’ I cried out. ‘Go on with the shave, and let me get out of this.’ “The shave was completed—after a fashion, and there wasn't a word spok en during the rest of the process. The tip was forgotten.—New York Herald. WAS THIS DOCTOR A QUACKT Cured a Patient of a Hallucination by a Clever Trick. We recall the case of an unhappy wretch who came to Washington some years ago imploring the doctors to re lieve him of a snake which he said he had swallowed while drinking at a spring and which, as he violently de clared, was devouring the coat of his stomach. One by one the learned gen tlemen examined him, satisfied them selves that there was no snake—as, indeed, there was not—and sent hjm away with the solemn assurance that he need not worry about it ahy more. He continued to worry, however, xnd when at last he found a physician Who cared more about results than etiquette he was on the verge of actual Insanity. This great physician soon perceived that he had to deal with a hallucination, not a snake, and proceeded accordingly. He employed a colored citizen and a tin bucket. Two hours In Rock Creek park brought forth a garter snake of small size but great activity, and an earnest and in dustrious emetic did the rest. The victim saw the snake wriggling In the bucket and went home happy. It Is part of the history of that period, however, that the physician who achieved the cure was loudly de nounced as an outlaw, and consigned to everlasting odium for unprofes sional conduct. We never heard that he lost the confidence of the public on that ac count, however, and as the fame and the fortunes of medical men are made by their practical achievements and not by the approval of their fellow doctors we rather think he profited in the end,—Washington Post. The Gospel of Must. There is work in the world for the totfer or dreamer And the work that's at hand is the work he should do; And whether the toiler's mechanic or schemer The result is the crystallized “thing that he knew." I,et the thing be a good thing the world Is the better— If bad tis a pity the tools did not rust. Good, had or indifferent, man is the debtor (So he'll tell you at times) of the Uos p«l of Must. "1 just had to do it!" cries weak-kneed offender ■Gainst morality's haws, when he's called to account. "I had to!" the borrower say9 to the lender— So do Instances rise- there are any amount. Cruel fate is most kind in providing ex cuses For weak, foolish men who lie prone in the dust— And. while helping the wicked and fool ish. traduces A great and wise message, the Gospel of Must. The wise man must give of his wisdom to many; The man with great gifts always must puss them on. The good man forbears doing evil to any— Always must do what's right, and bid evil begone. Grim necessity cruelly tries every fellow Who walks 'neath her banner. Ah, heartless her thrust! You must do right or wrong! You must be red or yellow— So the weaklings arc killed by the Gos pel of Must! —Pittsburg Dispatch. His Debt to the Bible. A frivolous visitor to the Fiji islands said to a Fijian chief; “It is really a pity you have been so foolish an to listen to these missionaries. No one nowadays believes in the Bible.” The chief's eyes flashed as he said: “Do you see tha* stone? There we killed our' victims. Do you see that oven? There we roasted their bodies for our feasts. If it hadn't been for the mis sionaries and the Bible you would have met the same fate.” Discourtesy Madge—He tried to Kiss me. al though we are not engaged. Dolly— What made him think he could do it? Madge—I suppose it was because ha had been in the habit of calling on you.—Judge. Shame! When a nftn's foot gets tangled up with a woman's under the table and she gets mad about it, you can make her madder by pretending you thought it was somebody else. . Two English Speakers There. British as well as American Cath* dies will have but one repreaentaflvs at the papal conclave. Cardinal Git* bona, the American representative, it already In Europe. Of the two British cardinals, only one, Cardinal Logu^ the Irish primate, will be able to at tend, as cardinal Moran, archbishoi of Sydney, has no chance of reachlnng Rome in time for the conclave. Why It Is the west Is becense mads by an entirely different process. Defiance Starch 1* unlike eny other, better end one-third more for 10 cents. A woman who loved but once, and madly loved on to the end, ought to be canonized. The man who admits that he Is sen timental made the mistake of his life in not having been born a woman. Btopn tne I'ongli and Works Off the Cold Laxative Bronio Quini.je Tablets. Trice25a, Man likes to believe in eternal pun ishment—for the other fellow. A man w ho 1b "so good” is real un canny. CITC penrsnesny roreci. jro uuor nerrnanenefts* ■ * * * #r«t d»*» uwor I>r. Kune * Orest KerreRett nr er. Send for FRKK •3 00 Mel bottle end trrstbe. On K. H tun. Lilt. K1 Anh Street, miedelehle.*** It takes two banana skins to maks a pair of slippers. Those Who Have Tried ft will use no other. Defiance Cold Water Rtarrb bee no equal in Quantity or Qual ity—10 ox. for 10 cents. Other brands eon tain onlv 13 nr.. Man often feels that be Is a sly dog when, in reality, he is but a sorry cur. ALL CT-TO-DATE HOUSEKEEPERS Use Red Cross Ball Blue. It makes clothoe clean and sweet as when new. All grocers. If a poor girl has hair of the spun gold variety folks say it looks like streaked molasses candy. It takes a genius to be a financier without being the possesor of any finances. More Flexible and Lasting, won't shake out or blow out; by using Defiance Btasch you obtain better results than possible with any other brand aad one-third more for same money. Love is like* smallpox. Sometimes you escape, but it often leaves awful scars. A New Slot Machine. The -slot” machine has entered a new field. For a long time, by drop-1 ping a penny in its maw the gum ehewer, the man who likes to know what his exact avoirdupois is, the girl who loves a lozenge and even the quick-lunch man. hurriedly seeking a sandwich have been accommodated. But the new field is a wider one. The diner in some restaurants can now, by a new invention in the “slot” line, rest ai ease while he takes his meals and reads complacently between bites the religious mottoes tin the wall, for before he sits down he cafi go to a box, drop a penny in the slot and out jumps a key from another slot. That key opens a closet ample enough for his hat and coat. The very hooks on which he hangs his clothes lock also, so that even if the door of the closet were opened the articles cannot be hurried away with by anyone but the owner. Our Beef Croesuses. The bigest beef man in the United §tates had very humble beginnings. Nelson Morris was a peddler in Con necticut. and started business in Chi cago with one hog. The late Gustavei F. Swift began his career with one' sheep in a small town in Massachu setts. Philip D. Armour, too poor to buy transportation to California by ship in the days of the gold fever,, traveled overland from Oneida, N. Y., most of the way on foot. He made a few dollars on the Pacific coast dig-; ging ditches to supply water for plac er mines. These three men laid up nearly $100,000,000 between them. ABOUT COMPLEXIONS. Food Makes Them Good or Bad. Saturate the human body with strong coffee and it will in timo show in the complexion of the coffee drinker. This is caused by the action of coffee on the liver, thus throwing part of the bile into the blood,. Coffee complexions are sallow and muddy and will stay that way until coffee is 2iven up entirely. The sure way to recover rosy cheeks and red lips Is to quit coffee and drink Postum Food Coffee which m^kes red blood. "I had been for more than 20 years an Inveterate coffee drinker and it is absolutely true that I had so completely saturated myself with this drug that my complexion toward the last became perfectly yellow and every nerve and fibre in. me was affected by the drugs in coffee. “For days at a time I had been compelled to keep to my bed on ac count oT nervous headache and atom ache trouble and medicines did not give me any relief. I had never con sulted a physician in regard to my headaches and terrible complexion and I only found out the cause of them after I commenced the use of Postum which became known to me through Grape-Nuts. We ail liked the food Grape-Nuts and it helped us so we thought Postum must certainly have merit and we concluded to try it. We found it so delicious that we continued the use altogether although I never expected it to help my health. “After a few months my headaches were all gone and my complexion had | chared wonderfully then I knew that my troubles had been caused by cof fee and had been cured when I left off coffee and drank Postum in its place.” Name given by Postum Co., Battle Creek, Mich. Postum will change the blood of any coffee drinker and rosy cheeks and health take the place of a yellow ckin and disease.