Loup City Northwestern CEO. E. BENSCHOTER, Ed. and Pub. LOUP CITY, - - NEBRASKA. Lockjaw leaves statesmen alone, of ■else they are immune. Shall we also be Jolly good fel lows if Sir Thomas lifts the cup? That $5,000,000 toy trust will furnish monopoly's newest "something to play with." M; de Plehve says Russia will "en courage the Jews to emigrate. ” "En courage” is good. Never roll a MS to be offered to an editor, unless you roll it around a couple of 60-cent cigars. The prudent woman will think twice before 6he takes up the men's sock fad and puts her foot in it. Japan is doubtless gritty for its size, but it should be warned in ad vance that Russia is not China. Those three rten up north who took bed-bug poison for whisky merely made a mistake in the kind of poison. An automobile iB never so much out of place as at a horse show. Be sides, it is liable to add injury to in sult. It Is suspected by the police that there is a suicide club in Hoboken. Doubtless there is one there if any where. Grand Duke Vladimir, the czars uncle, declares that the Russian Jews are happy. Glad they are still alive, perhaps. Fathers-in-law make the most trouble before the marriage, but gen erally they mind their own business afterward. The Chicago youth who has stolen over a hundred bicycles during the past year must be crazy. At least he has wheels. Cuba would like to borrow' $3.',000, €00. Just now we don't happen to know anybody who has that much ly ing around loose. A London man has refused to be knighted by King Edward. Evidently he doesn't know of any rich American girl that he wants to marry. A New York paper reports the catching of a mackerel weighing 108 pounds. A decimal mark must have been dropped out of the original item. The man in Ivondon who has just sold thirteen apostle spoons for the record price of $24,000 cannot be per suaded that thirteen is an finlucky nutnber. An English Judge has declared that South Dakota divorces are no good. There are plenty of other people, how ever, who will never be happy till they get them. It's all very well for the astronomers to tell us that the new comet is in the vicinity of Alpha Cygnus, but most of us haven’t the least idea where Alpha Cygnus is. The public men who complain i about cartoons of themselves may some day be subjected to the awful condition of not having their pictures in the papers at all. Prof. Marinski of New York finds that the strains of the bagpipes are sure death to mosquitoes. Very likely: but a more humane way of killing them should be Invented. Possibly the officials ordered the j Kearsarge to make that rapid trip in j order that the toiling officers might j get into form again after their sumptuous fare In Europe. Englishmen have bowed courteously to the Americans who carried off the marksmanship trophy. A former gen eration once bowed very precipitately to Yankee straight shooting. Tesla’s prediction that it will be pos j sible to send photographs by a system ; of wireless electrical transmissions j may be regarded as one of the most brilliant things that he has done thus far, r It may be true, as an expert de- j elares. that the devil lurks In soda fountains, but people are not so much afraid of the devil nowadays as they used to be in the days of Cotton Mather. Dr. Stiles' discovery of the germ which produces laziness may be inter esting. but it would have been a great deal more useful to have discovered the germ which produces the desire for hard work. Who shall say that the duke of Marl borough is not fitted for the post in the diplomatic service to which he is likely to be appointed? He showed his skill in diplomacy when he got himself engaged to Miss Consuelo Vanderbilt. There is Home talk in Russia now of | expelling the Jews from that country i altogether if they don’t quit complain- ! lng about being oppressed. What the J Russians like is a man who will pa tiently let himself be flayed and pre tends he likes it while the operatios is In progress. | THE TURKISH HATH WESTERN IDEAS SUPERIOR TO THE ORIGINAL. Traveler Who Hae Undergone the Or deal In Dtmaicui Saya That There They May Be Genuine, but They Are Not Agreeable. I “About the first real craving that strikes the unsophisticated American or Englishman upon his arrival in Damascus is the desire for a Turkish | bath right on the spot where the fa mous bath was originatea,” said a traveler. “His next decision is that a New York or a London Turkish bath is about as far ahead of the Damascus article as mother's pies beat the bak er’s. In view of the eastern origin of these baths I naturally expected to had something of a luxury. “Entering one of the finest baths in the city, I was at first sight much pleased with the general appearance of things. Dug of a Christian that 1 was, 1 entered a large opeu court, in the center of which gushed a splendid fountain, while the scene ail about was at first, impression one of an oriental lairyland. All around the fountain on raised platforms were combination chair-couches upon which orientals were lolling as only orientals can. Some were reclining, some napping, some sipping coffee, some smokinC the narghlleh. some chatting, and one was going through the red tape con* tortions required by Allah when the ninety-nine Moslem prayers are of fered. “As If to carry out the fairyland idea. Instead of being conducted to a private room, In conformity with the views of propriety of the western dog oi an un believer, I was expected to disrobe be fore the miscellaneous audience; also, before the audience In the street when ever the door was opened. My clothes I had to store In a drawer under my couch. The publicity of the disrobing act was modified somewhat, however, by the attendants, who, by the use of towels, formed a temporary screen. Af ter this they gave me wooden sandals with high strips fastened to the soles, which converted them inter a sort of high stilt. I saw no use for this con trivance excepting to further the chances of breaking rny neck. With these stilts on. I was taken to the ‘hot room,’ where there was a temperature not higher than that of New York city or. a hot summer’s night. After re maining here some time there was some slight rubbing anu a deal of leg pulling and arm jerking. “Desiring a shower bath, a believer In the true faith aimed a garden hose at me with such a sharp stream that I had all the ’shower’ I wanted in three seconds. Then they wrapped me in a Turkish towel and turbaunod my head for me, and led me to a couch and hade me rest. I rested, wishing for an hour in my favorite Turkish bath In New York city, far from the land of Allah, within earshot of the clanking trolley car and in a district over which reigns only Shiek Tim Sullivan. “As a mere idea of satisfying curios ity nothing can top the visit to the Damascus baths. But. unlike the Turk ish fig. the Turkish bath is not at its best when sampled on the spot.”—Hy gienic Gazette. WHEN THE WORM TURNED, Mrs. Smoker Wanted a Change in the Brand of Havana. They were almost ready to start, and like a good husband Mr. Smokoi waited patiently for his wife to put the finishing touches to her toilet. She was adjusting her hat and took a hat pin from a big cushion Sud denly she excliimed: “I think it's a shame'.’’ “Yes. my dear,” nervously asssented Mr. Smoker. "I mean the way these writers say that women sharpen lead pencils and open cans with their husband's razors." “Yes. Now, I never do suck things with your razor, and I don't believe any women does as the writers allege. I looked at your razor once when 1 had a box of sardines to open, but it was so sharp and so wabbly in the handle that I was afraid to use it. Besides, when I want to sharpen a pencil and have no knife 1 nibble a point on it.” “Yes. my dear.” “But if the writers wish to put something true in the papers, why don’t they go for the men who use their wives' hatpins for pipe cleaners'' Ugh. you nasty brutes!” Mr. Smoker forgot to say " Yes, my dear.” The Scheme That Failed. The ways of the panhandler are many, and he is eonstanly working new schemes on the sympathetic po destriaa, says the New York Times The other evening a well-dressed young fellow walked up and down Fifth Avenue in the vlctnity of the Millionaires’ Fohr Corners and ac costed every passer-by who looked like ready money. He said that he had gone broke at the race track, and needed only a nickel to take him to his home in Harlem. “What have you been doing sine* the races were over, my boy?” in. quired a shrewd-eyed man who looked as if he might have been a lawyer. “Why, walking up and down hers looking for car fare," replied the paa handler. “A very foolish thing to do undei the circumstances,” returned the maw “If you had started to walk to Han lem instead you’d have been horn* long ages' ODD PRESENTS TO JOCKEYS. Fred ArcHer the Moit Fortunate Man in This Respect. No public man comes in for more presents from persons he has never seen or heard#of before than a suc cessful jockey, says London Answers. Many of theee gifts are of a highly valuable order, while others speak pleaner than words for the eccentric ity of the donor. Fred Archer was the most fortun ate jockey In this respect that ever lived. On one occasion $10,000 in notes was sent him anonymously, and he is said to have made $3,000 a year by presents of this kind. But now aday big gifts of money are rarely bestowed, although It is said Watts received £2,000 from an admirer four years ago. Archer, however, set greater store on some of the more trifling souvenirs he received. For Instance, after he had ridden Silvio to victory over the Derby course in 1877 a tramp came tc him and presented him a with three penny piece, which from that day for ward he always wore as a talisman in every race. On Derby Day annually too, he was the recipient of a dozen linen shirts from an anonymous ad mirer, while among the other trifles received by him were a grand piano n yacht, a litter of young pigs and a share in a north-country public house One of the most curious talismans ever worn by a JoclCey was the bullet always inseporable from the late Harry Grimshaw. .Just before one of his big races a powerfully built man came up, and, showing him a bullet, said: ‘if yon lose I'll put this through you: but if you win you shall wear it for life;” Grimshaw won, and a few days later the bullet set in gold as a watch charm arrived, and he wore it till the day of his death. A FAITH TO MOVE CITIES. Surely Thi* Was a Prayer That De served to Be Answered. Georgia is not yet four years old. She lives In Northwestern Connecti cut with her mother and baby brother, because the boy does not thrive in New York, where the children’s father Is kept by* his business. The father does not see his family as often as he would like, and his visits are so few and so short as to be a real grief to the little girl, who loves him dearly. Not long since her mother was trying to make her understand why her fath er could not come oftener. Believing in the efficacy of prayer, Georgia put the question: “If I asked Dod to let papa turn, would he do it?” "Better ask God to make brother well, and then we can go back to New York and live with papa always,” said the mother. Down on her knees went the trust ful. loving littie soul and prayed: ‘Please, Dod, make my braver Neville well, so’s we tan be with papa in Noo Ork. or if you don't want to well Neville, please move Noo 'Ork to Neck-tick-kut. so I tan see my papa jf'ner, Amen!” “Buchanan Has Sneezed!” Mrs. Harriet I ane Johnston’s death has revived the memory of the tactful uul gracious mistress of the White House during the presidency of her uncle, James Buchanan. An old Baltimorean at the Fifth \venue Hotel the other day related some anecdotes of the other side of her life, as mistress of her own home and devoted mother of two tine lads, whom she brought up as though they were delioate exotics. A dinner party was in progress at the Johnston home, when the nurse appeared at the dining room door. "Mrs. Johnston." she said solemnly, as if she were a hearer of sad tidings, ■Buchanan has sneezed.” It was a vivid, if somewhat ludi crous, illustration of the extreme care Mrs. Johnston took of her boys. Henry and Buchanan, both of whom, how ever. died in their teens.—New York Times. He and She. He walked along as If he might Have known a thing or two; He slipped and hit the Icy walk. As if he might go through. He gathered up Ids scattered words. And said them over twice. Because his equilibrium Had failed him, on the Ice. He looked around him just In time To see a saucy maid I.augh loud, and then go slipping down Bike mercury In the shade. She gathered up her packages And smiled an empty smile; She didn't say a word out loud. But talked inside tlie while. She cracked the smile to fool the man She laughed at, wouldn't you? The man gave several chuckles. ' And the "horrid ice" cracked, too. The fall, the laugh, the ice. the Joke. Were all forgotten when They started on together, lest They both go down again. Beyond a Question. Magistrate Crane of Now York has of late received innumerable letters regarding his claim that women are tillable to make trustworthy identifica tions, and he has also been inter viewed by innumerable reporters on this subject. To one reporter, the other day. he said: “A salesman of trouser-stretchers told me a rather good thing about a woman this morning. It is somewhat foreign to the topTc we’re discussing, but I’ll,repeat it to you, anyway. "The salesman said he was going from house to house one evening sell lug his trouser-stretchers. He rang the bell of a-certain dwelling, and a man came to the door. “ Are you, sir. the master of this house?" the salesman asked. "The man smiled, faintly. •'’I am,' he said. ’My wife died laM week.’ ’“—Detroit News-Tribuuak GREAT POETS POOR HAND. Shakespeare's Writing Not Hie Chief Claim to Fame. W. Carew Hazlitt In a recent article on Shakespeare's handwriting says: "We have to bear distinctly in mind when we seek to criticise these some what unclerkly examples of penman ship that the great dramatist used the court, not (like Jonson and Becon) the Italian, hand, and that in the case oi his contemporary and countryman, Michael Drayton, the characters of the signature are equally distant from ful filling technical postulates and, if pos sible, still less elegant. The question of handwriting is, of course, independ ent of that of educatlor.nl acquire ments, as we may satisfy ourselves from innumerable instances, ancient and nodern, but if Shakespeare was less happy in bis calligraphy than in other directions the circumstance docs not affect, as some have sought to demonstrate, his general learning, and was his personal idiosyncrasy rather than the blame of the excellent provincial school which had the unique honor of being his alma mater.” THE BLESCINGS OF HUMOR. Moral Drawn From Career of the Late Max O'Rell. If there is a moral to be drawn from the career of Mat O'Rell it con cerns the practical value of a sense of humor in promoting the comity of nations. The satirist sets people by the ears, but the humorist, by teach ing them to smile at each other's amiable weaknesses, predisposes them to friendship. We and the French are undoubtedly the better friends and the more conscious of our common humanity for the genial manner in which M. Paul Blouet al ternately chaffed John Bull and Jac ques Bonhomme. As the merry mu tual friend of the middle classes of the two countries he rendered a ser vice to which they may now join in paying tribute; and one wonders, without feeling unduly Eanguine, whether there will ever arise among 3ur foreign language masters a Ger man Max O'Rell, whose kindly jests will have an equally salutary effect upon our relations with our Teuton kinsmen.—London Graphic. The Man Behind the Fire. A worker at the Sailors’ Mission in East Boston, has a story of heroism to tell. One night in January a fire man on one of the ocean steamers walked in the darkness down an open hatchway, lie fell to the hold, broke his leg and received other injuries. His outcry brought a group of stev dores to his help, and they were ex citedly discussing what to do for him when it became evident that he was trying to speak. “Be quiet, boys,” said one of the men. “Maybe Jake's wanting to send a word home.” But it was not of home poor .Take was thinking, even in that moment of agonizing pain. "Tell the fifth engineer to look after the boiler!” he whispered. That is the sort of fidelity and cour age to put to shame the theorists who would have us believe that self-inter est is the only motive that rules men in the workaday world.—Youth's Companion. Women in South Africa. Openings for women in South Afri ca appear to be many and varied. A woman writing on this subject says the peculiarity of this country is its unfamiliar conditions of life. Lux uries are more in demand than neces sities. The range of employment open to women is a wide on% vary ing from domestic service to beauty doctor, but everything is much more expensive in this newly opened land. Living in the Transvaal is at least 100 per cent dearer than in London. Laundresses are scarce and the call ing in small favor among the women at the Cape, who fear social ostracism if they turn to the washtub. This and the fact that doilies are being sent out to some of the bouses need ing decent furniture throws a curious side light on this country. There are chances for much money to be made by clever women caterers at railway stations. These are few and far be tween and the rentals enormous. The Silent Little Prayer. My little boy knelt at my knee last night And said the prayer my mother taught me long ago; Then for awhile was silent, with hit head still bowed. And when at last he rose to give the kiss For which I waited, and withdrew his arms, I asked him why he had kept kneeling when >ns "Now I lay me down to sleep" was done. Grave-faced, he »ald "In Sunday school they asked The children all. when they have said their prayer*. ' To whisper, asking God, up there, to bless The little ones In China and to put The love of Jesus in their hearts.” If one True, tender little prayer like that were said For mo each night. I’d ask no more, and claim The richest blessing God may send an mine. Why He Didn't Call. Henry Taylor Gray of Bradstreet's has just come back from a trip around the world. On the return voyage he fell into conversation with a purse pr.wd New Yorker who had made the sane trip. "I suppose you visited the Pyre nees?” said Mr. Gray in the course of the talk. “No,” bluffed the other. ‘‘Thej wanted us to spend a week with them, but they got measles in the family at the last moment and had to recall the invitation."—New York Evening World. THE SUNDAY SCHOOL. LESSON VIII., AUG. 23— DAVID AND JONATHAN. Golden Text—“There Is a Prtefid That Sticketh Closer Than a Broth er”—Proverbs 18:24—The Results of the Sins of Saul. I. "A Notable Friendship.-’—The lesson for to-day Is a mort Interesting and al most romantic section of David's his tory. In whlrh we can delightfully trace the workings of God's guiding providence, as he leads a young man toward his life’s work. The friendship of Jonathan and David was one of the most perfect arid beauti ful ever known. "The soul of Jonathan was knit to the soul of David”; their souls were interwoven together; "and Jonathan loved him as his own soul." II. "Three Essential Conditions of Friendship."—It is true that "the mar riage of souls Is a heavenly mystery, which we cannot explain"; but it is also true that we can see some of the conditions necessary to the strongest and most abiding friendship. First. Mutual Worth. There must be something strong and noble in each part ner to the friendship. Second. An Essential Similarity with Minor Differences, not indentlty. but har mony. Two friends must be set to the same key. and each note must harmonise with the others. Third. The Spirit of Self-sacrifice. Friendship always implies the willingness to sacrifice self for the sake of the one loved. Christ was a measureless lover, and hence glorified above every other.”— Bishop Warren. ill. Mow David and Jonathan Mil filled These Conditions.”—David. It Is worthy of special notice that It was when David's worth shone resplendent In his victory over Goliath that (Jonathan's soul was knit to the soul of David. t IV. "How Jonathan Expressed his Friendship.”—I. Sain. IS: 1-4. Jonathan, the prince, took olT his royal soldier (gar ments and gave them to David, together with his sword and "his famous bow, which was his special weapon" (II. 8am. J: 22). and his princely girdle. V. "The Test of Friendship.”—Vs. 12 23. A court, and especially an Eastern court, is a perilous place for a young and untried man. and most of all for one with the popular ft I live shew me the kindness of the l.ord.” 17. "Jonathan caused David to swear again." The Intensity of his love led him to want the sweet words repeated again and again, as in v. 42. "Jehovah was to be watchman, umpire, arbiter between Jonathan and David.—Johnson. 15. "Tomorrow is the new moon.” Jonathan now returns to David's sug gestion in v. 8, and proceeds to*unfold Ills plan of making known to his friend the state of the king's feeling toward him. 13. "When thou hast stayed three days,” in Bethlehem jon to wound if not kill him. At the appointed time Jonathan went ■out into the country to give his signal to David, lie not only hade the boy to go beyond where he was. but he shouted to him. "Make speed, haste, stay not,” intended for David's ears. After the boy had gone Jonathan went to David's hiding-place, and the friends kissed one another in the Oriental fash ion. and wept. . Then they parted, never to meet again, ■save once, a year or two later, in the wilderness of Ziph. when David was pur sued by Haul. Then Jonathan went out into the wilderness to comfort his friend, and ''strengthened his hand In God” ‘(I. .Sam. 23: 16». Read David’s beautiful "Song of the Bow." his lament over his dead friend (II. Ham. 1: 17-27). VI. "Lessons Taught I's by This Friend ship."—“Every man may learn from this story of Jonathan how to choose friends." ;for we have the right and power to choose who shall be our friends, "t'hoosc friends, not for their usefulness, but for their goodness; not for their worth to us. but for their worth In themselves, and choose, if possible, people superior to ourselves.” — Kingsley. • The friendship of Jonathan and David teaches ns concerning the higher friend shit) with Jesus. First. We must be friends to him. us well as he to lis. He loves us, whether wo do him or not: but we are not friends unless we also love him. nor can we elaim the benefits of that friendship. Hecond. Friendship with Jesus Is based on worth. We love him because he is so good, so noble, so lovable. Third. Friendship with Jesus Implies self-sacrifice. Jonathan cheerfully relin quished his hopes of his father's kingdom for his friend David. Jesus left Ids heavenly kingdom to come down to us, and he died upon the cross that we might be kings and priests In his Father's king dom. We. on our i>art. are to show our love hy sacrifices for him and hia causa. Compare the friendship of Ruth. Faith Producing Love. What we should do is really, very often, to he still. And if we want something to make us more active and energetic, watchful, and holy, I know but one thought, that is faith— faith producing love. More trust and confidence and joy in God would be the secret—the only true or successful Becret—of more goodness. And this should come quietly and calmly, not In great efTort; this kingdom of God has come not with observation. Best and quiet growth are what you want. —James Hinton. I Competition is the We of trade an< the death of the non-advertiser. DO YOrR CLOTHES LOOK YELLOW? If bo. use Red Crocs Ball Bias. it will main them white as snow. 2 oz. package 5 cents Seeing isn't believing when a mas can t believe his own eyes. To the housewife who has not y«1 teems acquainted with the new things of everyday use In the market and who Is reasonably satisfied with the old, we would suggest that a trial of Defiance Cold Water Starch be made at once. Not alone becanse It is guaranteed by the manufacturers to be superior to any other brand, but because each 10c package con tains 16 ozs., while all the ether kinds contain but 12 ozs. It is safe to say that the lady who once uses Defiance Starch will use no other. Quality and quantity must win. Opposition Inflames the enthusiast, never converts him.—Schiller. The Asters at Court. William Waldorf Astor has never recovered his social footing In Lon don since he snubbed one of King Ed ward's friends by turning him out oi doors when he came to the Astor res idence without invitation, having been brought there by one of the guests, with whom he had been din ing. But the royal cold shoulder does not extend to the expatriated ;Qneri can s son. for young Waldorf Is quite popular at court. He was even in cluded among the small number ol “personal friends of their majesties” who were invited to celebrate the for tieth anniversary of the king's wed ding. Eight Tall Brother*. At a recent meeting of Benjamin Hamrick's family in Webster Springs, W. Va„ it developed that the aggregate stature of Mr. Hamrick and his eight pons was sixty two and one-half feet. The father stands six feet five and one-half inches and the “sawed-off” of the family, a son named William, is six feet one inch. The members of this remarkable family range in weight from 155 to 200 pounds. She Didn’t Care. Maplehill, la., Aug. 10th.—“I felt as though I didn't care whether I lived or died, 1 was so miserable all the time.” In these words does Miss Nellie Bar foot of this place describe her condl-. tion. Every woman who is, or has been sick and suffering will under stand and appreciate just how Miss Barfoot felt, and there are no doubt many thousands of similar cases. It is truly an awful thing when a woman gets so low that she can say "I don’t care whether I live or die.” But Miss Barfoot tells a different! story to-day, and her words shouldi guide every suffering woman to the path of health and happiness. "I used Dodd's Kidney Pills, and I am cured. I feel like a new person, and I would say to every woman suf fering as I did. give Dodd’s Kidney Pills a trial and you will not be disap pointed. They are worthy of the high est praise.” i Wise is the man who can recall a previous engagement when he re ceives a disagreeable invitation. 'SAWYER'S 'excelsior brand Stickers Warranted Water Proof. | SAWYER’S Oiled Clothing made for all kinds of work. Get ; only the genuine xhat will not crack, peel or get ttlckj. I r four dealer doesn't have bam, write for catalogue to II. M. SAWYEH A BOX, East Cambridge, Maes. EVERY SHOOTER WHO SHOOTS AMMUHITIOM has a feeling of confidence in his cartridges. They don’t misfire and always shoot where you aim. Tell your dealer U. M. C. when be asks ** What kind ? ”, Send for cntatog. The Union Metallic CartridfeCo. Bridgeport, Coen. The 1/ Cor. 19th (■< Tl\",ey^ur*“SSTJ- >. The only positive cure for Drankeaaess. ** D>a|-Cllsf end the Tobeceo Habit- Cor respondence acridly confidential. WM n. BURNS. Manager. CHAMPION TRUSS |2§? ?S Win. Auk Yunr Phvrictaef* Advice. ItOOKLhT >HKE. Philadelphia Truaa Co.. 61P Loeuat Bt, Phila., Pa. Do volt want a box of good FIVE CENT CIGARta FREE I If an. nend your name and aildreae to LENOX CIGAR CO., 1*2 Dearborn 8t., Chicago, 111 > When Answering Advertisements Kindly Mention This Paper. W. N. U.. Omaha. No. 33—1903 fs> cr o 00 H ¥