Not Honor, but Eeal Ducats, ia What Bryan Wants. ME SILVER ORATOR IN BAD LIGHT Production of a f.etlcr that Make* the Perennial Providential Candidate Con traillct Hlinveir—<1. Starling Horton Produces a Document that l.ook» Had lor tlie Self-Constituted ID former. J. Sterling Morton made the asser tion In the Conservative several weeks ■ago, says a Lincoln correspondent ot the Omaha Bee, that W. J. Bryan had said he wanted office for money ana not for honor. The Bee, in its lssi-e of September 27, contained an Inter view with Bryan, In which he posi tively denied that he had ever made such an assertion. Undeniable prtjof Is now presented that Mr. Bryan did say that he wanted the money for the office and not for honor. Because of this unequivocal and sweeping denial of Mr. Bryan and be cause with the denial he named the editor of the Conservative In an of fensive and accusing manner, J. Sterl ing Morton produces for vindication and verification and as a rebuttal of the unequivocal denial, a letter written by Mr. Bryan on January 11, 1899, in which he says: "I aasure you that It is the money that is In the office and not the nonoT that attracts me.” The publication of this letter recalls Mr. Bryan’s early political history. The man who sprang so quickly into world-famed reputation located at Lin coln In 1888 and a rliort time later formed a partnership v/ith A. K. Tal bot, under the firm name of Talbot & Bryan, In December, 1889, or the year following Mr. Bryan became an appli cant for the position of secretary of the State Board of Transportation. He had taken an nctlve part In politics ■ from the day he located In the city and be naturally had many political friends who were willing to assist him In getting the position. He had sup ported J. Sterling Morton for congress man from the First district during the campaign of 1888 and Morton re ciprocated by endorsing him for the secretaryship. The monetary Issue was not an Im portant Issue at that time and Mr. Morton ami Bryan were warm political friends. Considerable correspondence passed between the two and the fol lowing Is a copy of one of the letters Written by Mr. Bryan: “LINCOLN, Neb., Jan. 11, 1889.— Hon. J. Sterling Morton, Nebraska City, Neb.: Dear Friend—Your kind letter to Mr. Lease was received and delivered. I think It was well re ceived. The P. S. was Judicious. 1 think. I am grateful to you for your Indorsement. Had hesitated to write you because I dislike soliciting aid. i assure you that it is the monpy ihai Is in the office, not the honor that attracts me. If successful In getting It, It will tide me over my beginning here. With regards to the ladles, I am, yours very truly, W. J. BRYAN.” Falling to secure the appointment to the railway commission Mr. Bryan continued the practice of law, but In 1890 he announced his candidacy for congressman, and In tact, has been a candidate for office ever since. A. J. Sawyer and a number of other promi nent First district democrats asked Mr. Morton to come out as a candidate, hut he replied "No; not to go and ask any one to vote for me or work for me." His refusal to run made the nom ination of Bryan possible and those In charge of the democratic machinery turned to the young orator and he was nomlnateu. John H. Ames of this city, now a gold standard man, was chairman of the congressional eomit tee and It was he who started the Bry an boom. Since the memorable state convention of 1892 the two men who worked together In the campaign ot* 1888 have been drifting farther and farther apart. Morton pronounced for the gold standard and laid down u.s views from typewritten manuscript so that there could be no dispute as to where he stood on the situation. Bryan left the party, Ames resigned from the chairmanship of the congressional committee because of the congressional nominee's views on the money ques tion and after he had supported him tn Ills previous campaign. Bryan's repeated utterances concern ing the hetnousnesB of the mouey power and the greed for wealth re called to J. Sterling Morton's mind the assertion made In 1889 and a search was Instituted among the tiles of pa pers at Arbor Lodge for the letter. It was found among a number of other letters written by Mr. Bryan, all some what similar and equally Interesting One of them is u message sent after Mr. Morton's defeut for congress con gratulating him for ninntiig ahead ot his ticket. Only a few months utter this Mr. Bryan told his friends that he could get even more votes than Mr. Murtou got or could get. W bat All* lire Inter. Lincoln Journal: The pi tpoc ratio c rgaua are all declaring aa with one voice that Mr. Hryun'a old letter to J. Hu t Hug Morion avowing that fie wanted utile* (or the money that wax In It and not tha honor, la perfectly straightforward. proper and eredltahle to the great wearer o( the Jelferwontau it.antic thru why did Mr. Ilryan deny It and why did the popocrniic organ* *JA*»n * Mr Morton lonely ax a liar ami a libeller became he al l that Mr, H.) an had mm* mad a a ataletucnt tu that put i M t tu a friend f Morton d wxn t appear lu have tel any great atore by the letter bat nirre* lr atsuded tu u t»ocn*oie of Hr, Hrtan'a violent and th-atrbal alUUf on po»> pie whu, accordl*a to hla pure mind tioney and W i*ra*| fyr aroUUi wax t l uug tha • ouatfv Amt Ilryan and hi* frleada e« ideally aa* the p >tat and u*t»l* .1 tuvd it and «ball* aged Morton to hla proof That M what la (he Mil • tor with that letter Tm hungry ateaUlranf prefer* ih* «*ild ham to (hi mid »boulder. Blirtrijii-MPhlatlon of Msillltf. York Republican: Do yon have con fidence in the statements of men who wilfully misrepresent things to you? Things, too, that come within your own knowledge, so that you personal ly know that they are misrepresenta tions? Chaplain Mailley is quoted as saying, “Stand by McKinley, right or wrong.” He never said anything of the sort, “in times of peace 1 am for the administration when it is right; in times of war, so long aa a rebellous gun is aimed at the stars and stripes. I am for the administration right or wrong. This is not a time for criti cism; it is a time for united." That is what Chaplain Mailley said at York, and it is what he said at Lincoln. This is just what he said. Any paper which .quotes him as saying otherwise is guilty of a blameworthy action. What they make Mailley say sounds narrow and partisan. What he really said is patriotically American, and right or wrong, is concurred in by all patriotic people. The republican party agreed with the contention of the democrats during the rebellion that the income tax levied and collected for war pur poses was unconstitutional. It was necessary, however, as one of the means for the preservation of the country as a nation, ami right or wrong, the people stood by it and de fined It until it was no longer a neces sity, and then It was repealed. The disloyal citizen was opposed to it, but, right or wrong, the men of America stood by it, and so in times of war they stand by atj/ administration that represents their country. l‘*vtn Coin Ilrop* hllv«r. A citizen of Hebron writes that even the author of "Coin'’ has stopped talk on silver. He says: "Coin Harvey, ou.j.'nalf of thefusion forces, addressed an audience of about 200 at the court house here last night. The meeting had been largely adver tised, but no bearers were present outside of this city. The speaker, though advertised ns the exponent or free silver, entirely ignored that sub ject, devoting himself to a scnoolmas ler's dissertation on the subject of trusts, and an attack on the govern ment and a laudation of the insurrec tionists, especially the leaders. The administration was branded as oppres sors; the government as unjust. An Invitation was extended for queries and tiie speaker had some fired at him that are still unanswered. The audience was about half republican and they left the hall with renewed determination to stay by the adminis tration, caused by the abuse of the speaker. If the fusionlsts have any more campaigners like this one t*,e republicans are hopeful that they will be sent here, tor, with a few more speeches like this one, success for our candidates Is assured.” Hr vim Here mul llrymi There. Lincoln Journal: Colonel Bryan la hopping around so much on the ex pansion question and on the issues of 1900 that It is never safe to guess what he will say unless you know in what part of the country he is doing his talking. In Iowa he says he does not want the troops removed from the Philippines, and lays down a policy for the future of the archipelago that almost amounts to an indorsement of the administration. He did not talk that way in Nebraska, and will not talk in that strain if he happens to be called to Massachusetts before the close of the campaign. Bryan is the most ready man in the world on the stump, and one of his most pro nounced accomplishments is his re cently acquired ability to shift his ground to suit the prejudices of tiis different audiences. Mountain Out of a Molehill. Seward Reporter: The Omaha World-Herald, followed by its feeble imitators like the Seward Independent Democrat, is making a great ado about a circular issued by the president of the federation of republican publish ers. Among other tilings, the sugges tion is made that republican publishers should not club with populist papers. This causes the virtuous World-Her ald and its satelitrs to go into spasm of horror, and the way they talk about the attempt to "suppress fusion lit erature” is indeed distressing. One would think that they were in the habit of urging their partisans to sub scribe for and read republican papers. But tnis is the last thing they would do, and they and all their class prac tice the same thing which they so roundly denounce. Pup* PeteriMl Out Topeka Capital: What is the use of talking about populism in Kansas any longer? la*t the old republicans com" out of it and bark where they belong and the democrats go over to their own party. There is only one populist congressional representative in Kan sas. and lie is a good expansionist, and the party Is no longer of national significance. The scheme of fusion where tioth sides give up their princi ples for the offices. the most cor rupt practice in politics. Now Is a good time for populists to let go It ever hud any, and the contest is it ever ha dany, and the contest I* strictly between the old parties. A populist iu Kansas ran never be any thing else again but uu aid tu th* democratic party. 'T«m > Ten Kirlkn. Genoa la nder: i lie nomination ot Judge H me as candidate fur supreme Judge by the republicans was a ten •trike from a republican standpoint Judge H*‘e it Is |IM*»* votes stronger than any nt.m they could have nmi. nate<|. If he la defeated It will nut In ihe vulva of any man honestly inter ested In reform Ills nomination I al.-o gtsitifying to those republican? vhu have Im-*4 to ike u«e of p« «e hy our pun n* servant* aad would me urn mend in# retirement to private llte all a** ««pt ihe s»m* * If iHoipitsis rule a* ih*y have resolved, Wr Moteuml* w. t ha retired all rlgnl notion Advertise* Whs• man ha* dona woman think* •ha ran Itwprwva ua. Fusion Offioa Holders Win a Suit for Extra Salaries. GRAB AT THE STATE TREASURY. The Hill Was signed by Holcomb Who Wants Kurtber Endorsement at the* l'olls—The Boast of I’opullst Ite-form to Krdeeiu Salaries Becomes I.augblng Stock. The supreme court has decided that lJr. L. J. Abbott, formerly superintend ent of the Lincoln hospital tor the in sane, Is entitled to the salary desig nated in the enrolled bill signed by Governor Holcomb. As between the enrolled bills authenticated and signed by the governor and the engrossed bill that Is not authenticated and which is carelessly handled und goes through numerous hands, finally to be stored in the office of the secretary of state, the court decided that the enrolled bill constituted the only evidence worthy of consideration. The court holds that the engrossed bill, with its many slips of loose paper and slips pasted and pinned together, none being authenticated by any officer of the legislature, does not constitute evidence worthy of consideration. 1 he court appears to believe that It would be much easier for one to ."doctor ” the engrossed bill than It would be for enrolling clerks to perpetrate a fraud by Incorrectly enrolling a bill that must be signed by the officers of the legislature and then must go to the governor for Inspection for rejection or approval. Prior to the commence ment of the suit. Attorney General Smyth gave it as his opinion that a fraud had been perpetrated, but that the claim would have to be paid by the state. The Abbott case was a suit to re cover $1,000 salary. The enrolled bill signed by Governor Holcomb In 1897 fixed the appropriation at $2,500 a year, but the session laws compiled by A. E. Sheldon contained a footnote as follows: "As passeu by the legislature $2,000. Auditor Cornell paid 1 Jr. Ab bott $2,000 a year, und at the close ot his term l)r. Abbott appealed from the auditor’s decision to the district court, claiming the full amount designated In the law. Judge Holmes of the Lan caster county court held that the bill signed by the governor was the only guide and therefore the claim for the balance must be paid. The supreme court has affirmed this judgment. In the lower court Ex-Governor Hol comb and VV. B. Price, the latter being the legal adviser of the auditor in of ficial matters, contended tliut the court ought to receive as evidence the en grossed bill with its amendment which Hhowed that the legislature Intended to reduce the salary of Superintendent Abbott $2,000. Governor Holcombs attention was called to the condition of the appro priation hill before he signed It. Other salaries which the populist legislature sought to reduce were also found un changed In the hill that was before the governor. The governor Is said to have called In one superintendent ot a state institution and received a promise from the superintendent that he would not draw the full amount and thereupon the governor signed the bill. The assertion has never been made that Governor Holcomb received such a promise from the other five superintendents whose salaries were also unchanged. The boast that the populists’ legislature would reduce sal aries of superintendents of state insti tutions has therefore become a laugh ing stock. The enrolling clerks, either by design or through careless ness put in the same old tigures in stead of the reduced amounts. Governor Holcomb has been criti cised for signing the bill In that con dition. His political friends have sug gested that as his action will cost the state $3,300, It would have been better for him to have vetoed the items If they were not as the legislature In tended them to be, and the officers Interested could have received the cor rect appropriation from the next leg islature. A palpable error In the sal ary approDriation of Mr. Von Korrell. chaplain of the Kearney Industrial school, was remedied in this way. The enrolling clerks of the* legislature which passed the Abbott appropriation enrolled the chaplain's salary as $300 a year, when it should have been $800 a year. The legislature of lust winter appropriated an extra $.000 to reim burse the chaplain. I)r. Damerell, formerly superintend ent of the Hastings nsylum and Hr. Helper of the Norfolk asylum have also filed claims for an extra $1,000, basing their claims on the grounds urged by Hr. Abbott, and a suit has ulso been begun by Hr. liamereii. iir. Sprague, formerly superintendent of the institution for feeble minded youth at Iteutrlce, has tiled a claim for $3oo based on the same ground. These claims, amounting to $3,300 will now be paid by the auditor. Professor Jones, formerly of the institute tor tn*» blind. Is entitled to |.oo, amt Ur. Kail, formerly of the lleatrtce institution. Is entitled to |UW. but they have not yet tiled elatm-i. l*rnfeaaor Jones has teen quoted as saying hr did not desire to accept the mmo y under tne cirruni ItIMM. An tnanli t» Natmakn >nMI«n. I.liunln jiuirtiHl i\ hen t'mn llarvey MM !*• bln rtlgidebllgl lira In th tmp* that *hv rr*i» n Selranka la n pruu.l of her fighting l-'lnil regltn.m la lhal II refuaed in n.tiii*t «,t MitiiU he lliaults the hoyii i.f the Klral aa well a- Ihe people u( Nebr.uakti I he |.r . pie Ilf Nrl.r.iakt kui.n that Ihe r« a»mi Ihe Ihi)a ill.I Kill I* *klM waa betauae I hey Were alaolulidt uaeil up when they relumed in.111 the bring linj prr* par atm» in lieiug bmiorabty muait r*>i • ml t I the aarvtra lhal II waa phial, ally Impuanlhle fur item In may la lh» an vhe without a lung ml. There la hardly a mowiliar of the rag Ineni who would mu go tun h if ha thought k* wa* aaaU.t al the final gow lhal h# ha* going g real «u l ha* •celt hi* bn-thar il l Weelk art. T*»a people of Nebraska are prom) of the boys, not so much because of their gal lantry on the field, which was taken for granted w hen they enlisted, but be cause. notwithstanding the efforts made by demagogues of the Harvey stripe to induce them to demand their discharge at the close of the term of their enlistment the great majority of them declared that they would stand by the flag until the president was abl» to send fresh troops to take their plar es. Neither the hoys, nor the president nor the patriotic people of this state have forgotten the treasonable efforts of the pop leaders iti this state to get the boyB of the Hirst Nebraska to de sert their colors in the face of the en emy and demand to he sent home when the treaty with Spain was ratified ami they v.< re teehnicully relieved of their obligation to stay in the Philippines. It was dastardly and treasonable to tempt these boys to desert the flag In the crisis of the Aguinaldo rebellion and the state of Nebraska will never forget their patriotism and nerve in respecting the advice of the copper heads and staying by Otis until they were relieved by reinforcements months after they were legally entitled to their discharge and could have got ten it on demand. Tlie New ItrglKtry l.aw. Lincoln Journal: The last legisla ture adopted an important amendment to the law for the registration of voters that takes effect at the coming registra tion in this and other eitteH. Accord ing to this amendment It is the duty of the registrars to provide an ad ditional column for their registry list for the insertion of the name of the party with which each registered voter claims to affiliate. In addition to the questions which the registrars must ask the voter to he registered is another "with which political party do you affiliate?” ami his answ'er is recorded In the additional column. me object or nils amendment ’s to purify tiie primary elections. The committees under auspices the var ious political primaries are conducted are entitled to the privileges of mak ing copies of the registry lists for use in the primary elections, ami none but those wlio have declared their af filiation with the party holding the primary are entitled to vote ut such primary election. This prevents the stuffing of primary elections with votes cast by members of other parties and simplifies the work of the challengers In attendance at such primary elections. If the list shows that a vote is offered at such primary by a man who neglected or refused to state that he was a member of the party ..olding such primary such votes at once rejected. There is no compulsion about an swering the question if the voter to be registered doosr. t know to what party he belongs or is unwilling to be registered as belonging to any party. But in case of such refusal U> answer the voter is thereby debarred from voting at any primary election. Tills modification of the registry law was first adopted in Kentucky and has been very satisfactory to all parties. It relieves the political organizations, after the first registry, from the labor and expense of making a poll of the various precincts in a city tinder the registary law, as an inspection of the registry lists answers all the purposes of a poll. All voters have to be registered anew this year and after the list Is completed the record will be made that Will an swer the purposes of a poll. Then the political committees furnished with the registry list will bare all the neces sary information to get out a full vote and see that, the party strength is at the polls on election day. It is a sim ple and effective way of securing an honest primary election, which is the foundation of honest politics, and a full vote at the state and county elections. " uiu , A Word to SIIim. Hi, there. Old Slippery! ■ You’ve got to hump yourself. You’ve got to. You're several laps behind already, And You’re losing every day; Long hill to climb, old man. Heavy load? Yes, heavy load. But you've got to climb. You’ve got to. You’re out o’ meat. And they're after you; After you hard. An’ they’re goin’ to git ye, if you don't watch out. They’re after ye on the 1 louse rent meui. That’s the word, steal. You took it. You took the money, You know you did. You took $W) a month from the state Amt paid the landlady |3U. Was that right? An' they caught you at it. Couldn't deny It? No, of course not. You would if you could, 81, Hut they caught you With the wool In your teeth. Nice mess you've made Of the reform movement? The farmers used to like you, 81; Yes, they liked you. Thought you were Square and Honest. Fooled 'em! Forded with your honest d awl An' your sane timonius fare. Itoniiin' all right! Yes. you're ruuntn’ ad right; lost you’re rutiiitn' like A homeless rat Across a vacant lot With tin i itta an' old ahuia Hurled at you front Kv« ry dint iO>n Meow! )0»|, there* OW Slippery. Nebraska State Journal. A «||Mli*t| I «oUltl«l*. Notiody ha» ev*r aroused Jit'If• Meet of being 4tak«m»«r ami even tha opposition admit that he n on* of tba ablest law yen in the state It would be better tor any party to meet defeat i •th such a man than to win with a man like Ifohomb. Hut the republican i party will n*d be defeated thta tali. It - will win and Ho supreme b*n great as to Inspire reverential awe In every worshiper, and unspeakable fear In Ills enemies. "That keepelh covenant and merry.” That hath made covenants of mercy and love, and never falls In keep ing them. What he has once promised may he relied on forever. "For them that love him and observe Ids command ments." With whom the covenant was made, who fultll tltc conditions on which alone the blessings can be given. ti. "Confess the sins of the children of Israel." (1) He reeogtdr.es that the cause of their troubles lay In their sins. (2) That Ood was not to blame for their troubles. He bad kept ills part of the covenant. (3) Confession Is natural to a truly penitent heart. 14) Notice how lie Joins himself with the people In thlu confession. He does not say "they havo sinned," but “we have sinned.” “Both 1 and my father's house have sinned. He had sinned with them In three ways. 7. "We have dealt . . . corruptly." Home of these sins are mentioned In Neb. 5: 1-7, 10, 11; 13. 15; Kara 9; 1; 2 Chron. 36: 14-17. "Commandments, . . . statutes, . . . Judgments": I. c.. the ill vine law from every point of view,—what Ood has commanded, the laws be has en acted and recorded on tlie statute book. Ids wise Judgments on decisions us to right and wrong. Fourth. Pleading the promises. 8. "If ye transgress." etc. This Is not a quotation, but a reference to the gen eral sense of various passages, as, for instance, I,ev. 26: 27-30; Peut. 28 : 45-.,/; 62-07.—Pulpit Com. The fact that God had fulfilled his word of threatening was a proof that he would fulfill his word of promise. Ho that their very condition of suffering was an argument for believing God would help them. !). "But If ye turn unto me." If you will so act us to make It possible and wise to bless. "Will I gather them from thence" (I,ev. 26 : 40-45; Peut. 36; 1-10). This had already been fulfilled to as many as were willing to accept the privilege, but the blessing would be In vain unless the land wuh preserved for the people. 10. "Thy people, whom thou hast re deemed by thy great power.” Such as the deliverance from Egypt, victories by Joshua, by Samson, by Deborah, tho overthrow of the Assyrian army of Sen nacherib. and every triumph God gave them during their whole history. 11. "Prosper. I pray thee. Ihy servant this day." He proposed to make an ef fort himself, and he wanted God's blessing upon It. This petition expresses the sub stance of his prayers for four months, and the culmination on the day he planned to ask the favor from the king. He may have planned to ask tt many limes, but at lust the time came. "The ‘mercy' or compassion he sought from the king was not that the king would Interfere in la-half of Jerusalem, or send somebody to Interfere, It was not that the king would penult him to give Is If Ills fortune to hire help for his people; It was. In effect, that he might lie per mitted to surrender Ills brilliant position and prosperts, amt sacrifice himself for them " Professor Beecher. It was dan gerous to ask such a tyrant us Artu unia to give up his favorite cupbearer; lonce Nehctnluh adds. "For I was the kmg a eopbearer.' It was a hard and dangerous duty. If the king gruiittd his Itquest. The llsuitr files ( Isistand Plain Usaler: "Th* prla nn*r» llli'il Hun way into tin- prison fiom III* workshops as usual last night, sir." "Wall, what of nr "I ha«p iHtio erred this morning, air, lh.it *P»«U of thrill Rl**l Ihitr Way Ulll,” W Us I Ms *•!« l*Ms> link* U«un»*r Is always briggin;; about ths »mart«r»a of the buoy. Wi, ks Hut fcs I .i«»s out ih< smartest | Iking ih* yowugeier do**-making a( draft korea rtf kU dad when kr> goes out for a rid* Huston Trana< fl|M. H«s Sums H»* tits to "Ho you belts** IH ths «l>*e»e#n*s if tk« golden rut*"’ "Vet. I always Ilk* to bars »tk*r psopl* h*»p It la nusd when they are dealing with to*,” - thirst” T'*s* IlsiaW, i OUB BUDGET OF FUN, SOME GOOD JOKE-, ORIGINAL AND SELECTED. A Variety of J<»kcn, and front**. Original and ht*lec.‘*d—FI and Jotiiaiii from the Tide of Iluiuor—• Witty haying* A 8pwi# of lnsrenrlty. "I'm keeping a sharp lookout fur Work,” laid Meandering Mike. Plodding Pete gazed at him in mute dlemay as he added: "1 means it. You’ve gott r keep a lookout fur work dese busy days. If you ain’t careful a situation'll sneak up behind yer an’ grab yer an’ have yer under obligations to de pay roll before yer knows what's happenin'.”—Wash ington Star. (■raitimur. Not Time, "Goodneei! We ll miss the opera,” she said, impatiently, ‘‘We’ve been waiting a good many minutes for that mother of mine,” “Honrs, i should say,” he replied, somewhat acrimoniously. “Ours?” cried she, rapturously. “Oh! George, this is so sudden!” Then she fell upon his neck.—Catholic Standard and Times. Would Nooto No. Auntie—You’ll grow up ugly If you make such faces! Effle (wiping away her tears)—Diet you make faces when you was a little girl, auntie?—Ally Sloper. Checkmated. They were speaking of the now-wo man movement. ‘‘If a girl proposed to you,” she said, “you wouldn't dare refuse her.” "If a girl had the nerve and the determination to make a proposal,” lie replied, “I wouldn’t dare marry her.” In view of the eireumstances she de cided to wait for him to speak first. —Chicago Post. More Thun Ur Conl«! Htunrl. “Yes,” said the p^rty who was speak ing of the oldest inhabitant; "he was 104 years old and apparently la good health just before he died.” “Went off suddenly, did he?” "Rather. He heard of a man aged 106 in the next county and the shock killed him.”—Puck. lie Hail Nrini Them. ”1 think,” said the old lady wisely, "that young Mr. DinkB has a hold ou Mabel’s affections.” “Possibly, possibly,” replied the old gentleman, who had Just glanced intu the parlor. “At any rate he has a hold on her waist.”—Chicago Post. Where the Trouble I.le*. "Yes,” he said, as he got up to klr dle the kitchen fire, "love’s young dream Is all right so far as It goes, but the trouble is it Is only a dream.”— Chicago Post. - I Did More. "Did she make eyes at you when you tried to flirt with her?” "More than that. She made whole faces.”—Indianapolis Journal. Hard Llooi on the Duck. '‘Here, | say, I do feel Ir.dlguaal! What ho here'* that gtrl been and railed that thing a dark!" • And off h* went full peg and railed a special meeting of the (loyal Vloaiho-logical society to aaw If soanatklng couldn't ha done. I- Ally *Uoper. f«f |t “Why l« ska only lu half mooring? Of rwtirwe, ska married old dfctuHtal for hia gtwj, hut aba ought to re st* t M aieiuory now that h* • d< id ' “Ob. she think* *ha'* doing all that I* requited Mi d* f tk,. « i uu*t4»*.a Me only left bar kail hit fortune Chicago l*u«l. In M the M*a4*l4 “W bat la >»ur Idea of a guud Joke?** "Wall, any Juba that asaha* yog mat hetaoaa you didn't tklnh of It your* Mif.Detroit Praa Praaa