WHAT A LIE. |
i
A l:«lltor s»y» I'IihI II T»!tc» Money
to Run a Newspaper.
i'rt.ra the Covington (Ohio) Gazette;
"It takes money to run a newspaper."
—St. John (Klii.) News.
What an aggregation: what a whop
per. It. has heen disproved a thou
sand times; it is a clean case of airy
fancy, fi doesn't take money to run
a newspaper; It can run without mon
ey. It Is a charitable Institution, a
begging concern, a highway robber.
H Godfrey the newspaper Is the child
of the air. a creature of a dream. It
can go on and on and on. when any
other concern would be In the bands
of a receiver and wound up with cob
webs In the window. It takes wind to
run a newspaper; It lakes gall to run
a newspaper. It taker, a scintillating,
acrobatic imagination, and a half doz
en white shirts, and a railroad pass to
run a newspaper. But money - Heav
ens to Betsy md six hands round, who
ever needed money in conducting a
newspaper! Kind words are the med
ium of exchange that do the business
for the editor kind words and church
social tickets. When you see an ed
ilor with money, watch him. He'll
he paying hills and disgracing his pro
fewslon. Never give money to un edi
tor. Make him trade It out. He lik«-e
to pwnp. Then when you die, after
having stood around for years and
sneered at the editor and his little Jirn
• row paper, be sure and have your wifi
s'-nJ in for three extra copies by mu
of your weeping children, and whet,
she reads the generous and touching
notice about you, forewarn Iter to ne
gled to send fifteen cents to the editor.
Ji would overwhelm him. Money Is a
corrupting thing. The editor knows It
nnd what he wants Is your heartfelt
1 thanks. Then he can thank the print
i ers and they can thank their grocers.,
Take your Job work to the Job office
and then come and auk for half rater
for church notices. (Jet your lodge
letter heads nnd stationery printed
out of town, and then flood the editor
with beautiful thoughts In resolution:
of respect and cards of thanks. They
make such spicy reading, anti when
you pick It up filled with those glow
ing and vivid mortuary articles, you
are so proud of your little paper! Hut
money scorn the filthy thing. Don't
let the pure. Innocent editor know
anything about it. Keep th.it for
sordid tradespeople who charge for
their wares. The editor gives hitt bounty
away. The Lord loves a cheerful giver.
He'll take rare of all the editors. Don't
worry about the editor, lie has a
charter from the state to act as a door
mat for the community. He’ll get
the paper our somehow; and stand up
for you w hen you run for office, and lie
(about your pigeon-toed daughter’s
lackey wedding, and blow about yom
big-footed sont when they get a $4 per
week Job, and weep over your shriveled
soul when ft is released from your
grasping body, and smile at your giddy
wife's second marrbige. He’ll get along
The Lord alone knows how—but the
editor will get there somehow.
Xi’W 1.1 u<* to WttHhirigfon.
^ The [topuiar Monon Route has estab
lished a new Sleeping- Car line to Wash
ington, D. ('.. via Cincinnati and Dark
craving, by the C. 11. A 1).. II. A <>. S.
W. and II. A (>. Railways. The sleeper
is ready for occupancy in Dearborn
station any time after 'J p- m . and
leaves at 2:15 a. m. daily, arriving at
Washington at <'.:)< the following morn
ing. Tfch: schedule will be in effccton
J»nuaiy 2-1 and thereafter. As the
sleeper goes through without change,
and the hours of leaving and arriving
arc most convenient, this will proveal
together the most comfortable, as well
as the most picturesque route to the
national capital. City ticket office. 2 3 2
( lack street. Depot. Dearborn Station.
Shattered His Conceit.
■What’s the matter. Harry, old man
You look downcast.”
••I am downcast. My wife told me
last night that I was the biggest fool
on earth, unit Wien sue proceeueu 10
prove l hat w hat she said « ns true. ’
••I don't understand. How did she
prove it?”
••Ity reading a lot of love letters that
I wrote to her before we were mar
i ted.” Detroit dournal.
NO-TO-BAC FOH FIFTY Ct NTS.
Over dOd.nub cured Why not let Ko-To-Har
regu ate or remove voor desire for toliaero
ytny , money . mokes heath and manhood
i ate ipmrunjeed. .'iheandtl Ik ulldruAglst*
I'overtv is the mother of ninny |aua and
sorrows.
to t t to \ rot.tt in om: DIV.
y T . I , . ■ ■ • lit' ill *, i.iii I • a.I- A '
llruyulsts refund tfio mow y II u lulls locum lAu
The British «rl»tt« tkey ot 'iude- fourteen
tliuunnud | ei»un*
flTt ■’ »'»• I" ..in ...t N . 1 .
. r . , . ' IS. Kllnr'i l.iewl Ni i * •
if,l"*iVVo."«''7f. 5s»?!* * -a
A|.i»e leer I* u»>w the m e m thkiuunti
di-lii ls oi Mali ■>
Isslh « i»i| «oli«* d«e«*> M* »»«S|ite«w
SIMMs bum lb* fMiMktfea #* ki*wd ky
in. •«i.i Urn Mtd «*i«»ti*» w iu« -
.SSMtSMI S>MI< »•** ISMl ••< Sll dlSMMI
II is Iks •*•>*« |k»sMiMiisansiu,(ssl,
smisis's, ktliuusksks. pleurisy kssft d»
#•» w».| l»v*« ks-saas kssaski is.
sslk.es, *1***1. |*ll M«W. ■<M|M‘k dM
•kM M 1 * *esy
|
k IISHW Ik* k.i*s»s i« kcsiiky mas •'*
• nsbM* Ik. «k Ik Mks*kls **A Ms.s Ik*
M.MMM Mid l>sa Iks Oslo*
Hm* » Ik* Sk«* •* • ssIMikM* HStukl
WkkM* *k<*4 *1 ks|**| « Aim***, kkl.fc I*
Ml *4vkk*#d kl*BSf *ls»s«l
M M. *(1- w« I.S * *V I *W -SU •-*
4 SS» . ik V **♦ ■ *»• IS SI n . •»]*-••
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... ui» . kt s Ml §MMgkjt tr * *
• 4 •% . >»*- ' *-'•>
I
A CONSISTENT MAN.
-.i.. Hi; c J1 <l tnuk'
better toffee then
anybody else in
town. Everybody
admitted that, Irre
spective of person
al pride of family
affection.
A good many
people who ad
".T~ _ mired and who had
vainly tried to im
itate had asked for her recipe, hut the
only satisfaction they ever got for their
pains was: “Why, I Just make it, that's
nil.” Opinion was divided as to why
her answer was always so Indefinite,
her stanchest supporters claiming that
site was honest, and that that was real
ly all there was to it, she simply mix
ing the coffee and water, while iter own
potent magnetism did the rest. Bat
there were others who were not so
itrongly attached to her and who in
sisted that It w'as pure meanness and
telflshness that prompted Tier to keep
to herself the secret of turning off a
clip of coffee that for fragrance and
tleilclotisncss could not he found else
where.
I’eoplc never dropped Into her house
to an afternoon tea. She always served
offee. That was the reason the bach
elor called there so often. Teas, he
maintained, were such insipid, char
acterless affairs and worthy of being
attended only by people who were as
Insane as the tea Itself. Hut when It
rarne to coffee ah, there was some
thing that pm new life Into a man anil
drowned disappointment in the hopes
It Inspired of achieving something in
the future.
And she poured coffee us cleverly as
she made It. tfhe always looked her
best at those times, and It was well for
Ills beauty-loving eye that that was
what she was doing when he first saw
her. They were brought together at a
little Informal gathering at the: house
of a friend, and after b<* had met her
there a second time he felt that he was
privileged to call on her at her own
home. She gave- him coffee* there, loo,
and somehow presiding over her own
urn lent an added charm to her gen
tle graciousness. Kvon the aroma of
the golden brown liquid as It was borne
to his nostrils on little white* clouds of
steam Inspired a feeling of confidence
and homeliness which was ae.centu
ated by (lie dignified cordiality of the*
woman herself.
“Those bubbles fore tell that there Is
to be a eleep friendship established be
tween us,” lie said, leioking thoughtful
ly Into the fragile cup. ."That Is In
teresting, isn't It?”
"Yes," she; laughed, “but not very
surprising. What else do you sec?”
“Oh, nothing In particular. You see,"
lie resumed after a pause, ”1 am a
great advocate of friendship. I believe
it is to be; valued above all other tics,
love not excepted. My Ideal of an
earthly attachment is a pure, disinter
ested friendship, whether it be extend
ed a la Macawber, from man to man,
or from woman to woman, or between
the sexes.”
"I never could understand," she in
terrupted, “what people mean by a
'disinterested' friendship. If you are
disinterested how can you be a
friend?”
‘'Disinterested from a personal
standpoint,” he explained quickly,
• FRIENDSHIP," HE SAID,
"thoughtful auil miRcRoii* for the
friend, of tours#. A» I was raying a
moment before, I believe that there 1*
no relation that brings out the highest
sentiment tu ones n a hi re us does
friendship. Jealousy, suspicion and
nl! courser passions arc eliminated, unit
I fidelity. uu ellUhnesM mid integrity
I dominate the heart.'
••You are enthusiastic," ah# re
marked.
’Perhaps.' ho assented, ’ lot I am
consistent In my belief. I set* nothing
to ptevciit our hemming fust such
tr ends, do you?"
It theic net# any olista les in the
s ty they were noon overcoms. It#
(ailed but two or three time* a week
during the rti*t few month* of ihdr
.iritualnianc#, but ihe restriction* *he
had |iii|sutJ upon too frcttumi visit*
wet# dually removed and thm he fell
i Into the b*h i of stopping there every
day on hi* say b«m<- fiom ih« audio.
It ng* th* coffee ho went tor of
(suiw. lb iuM hi* friend* *»>. he **<
serted ihe Min# thins to h«r and «*en
went so 1st g* to belle** II hlUIMlf.
ipw glsav* smiled when he sold *«y
Iking abugi It. hut *h* vu loo sto*
tu*au alb him
*|'hc> set# Very iwld' «li*l IH'dl
hod much 10 rl te, it. *.*• is years
ct|t! he M4u I t*U «ay btuly hi* age fur
y«pfo fetors mo*ling hot and *h* » a*
~f ffh* nstked lu m> * b* If.ll* tilde*
' than that, and by degress *h« gov* him
g apoU *kel«h«o of th* >«ih msrrwg
di ap '.’aw o. ul and ptivat. m tM had
hrmgrf ~~ gj. tfe Merit .«< p.- mttur*
.*«* j» son a very path' n a I sod
hi* h ,.»» «lo*ys ih" 111*4 st h vmis
IhV s* fe> linened
I u .•.*•»* to morr* •**>•. *«■ *4
* 1 '* /.’jr*
on at th* u * r •»« it* btm
tuey.
•'1)0 }'< u tli. il; -u?" she ,
| naively.
Tin cure of It. If I were ur.t go old
I'd consider the matrimonial question
myself. Hilt when a man reaches my
age without having committed himself
' It” may safely be put down as a con
j firmed bachelor. Then is when we
learn to value friendship so highly.
I wish I were either a little younger or
possessed of more youthful spirits. Hut
a man with a varied experience ages
rapidly. So I suppose
The supposition ended In a sigh.
She reflected a moment, then said soft
ly:
“There Is a man In the south who Is
coming to see me soon. I’ve been ex
pecting him for years, but there were
things that prevented. I used to think
him thoroughly congenial, but now I
know better. Since then I have seen
- men for whom I could care a gres.'
deal more.”
“Have you?” he asked. “What were
they ilk-?”
’Til tell you some day,” she replied,
adroitly.
The bachelor had work out of town
at that time and he did not see her
again for two weeks. He called imnic
! dlately after his return, and she wel
comed bint with unfeigned pleasure.
"I'm so glad you've come," she said,
as soon as he had entered the room. I
have so much to tell you. I.ook Into
your cup and see w hat the bubbles say
now.
He studied the surface of the coffee.
"Friendship." he said at length, “un
broken, hallowed friendship.”
■'Is that all?”
“Vc-e-s, I believe so. There Is one
bubble thjit nitebt be construed other
wise, but I hardly think it would be
advisable to do so."
Kh<* sighed.
"My friend from the south canto
last week," she said. Ho wants me to
marry him. You have been my solo
confidant for the last two years and T
wish to consult you before giving hint
a final answer. Shall I accept him?
1)0 you think there is nothing better?"
Somehow the deferential, earnest w ay
in which she put the question took
something light and hopeful out of his
heart and left a great void there. Ills
hand trembled as he set down the
cup.
"So you wish me to be your oracle?”
"Yes.”
Jle remembered her words In regard
to other men for whom she could care
more. Had her friendship ripened into
something deeper and stronger? Did
she mean-? But was be willing to
let her mean it? "Unbroken friend
ship,” he reflected, "which means fidel
ity to the Interests of the other?”
He was consistent to the last.
"I think," he said, "you had better
accept hint.”
GATHERING AQUARIUM STOCK.
How I.ill- Mullen Are Mlntiil mill rre
imrrd for TrunnporAllon.
Men experienced In gathering aquar
ium stock never ship fishes long dis
tances immediately after they are
caught, if It can lie avoided: the mor
tality Is almost sure to he great ar.-toug
stock ho shipped. By whatever means
a fish ha* been captured It is likely
to have been more, or less excited and
it may have suffered some Injury which
would make it liable to attack by fun
gus. It is the practice when possible
to place the newly caught fish in fish
ears or in some other suitable place
at or near the shore in the vicinity of
where they were caught, where they
may be rested for the Journey, accus
tomed under favorable conditions to
captivity, and accustomed to feeding,
and where the weak or Injured fishes
may be weeded out. In ibis way only
good and sound (ish are Anally started,
and these are started in the best possi
ble condition. Pishes thus selected and
prepared are far more likely to get
through all right, and such Ashes are,
of course, far more likely to survive
lu an aquarium.
I rtt'U AImiii! ruiDlcn Sion*.
Pumice, as is well known, i of vol
canic origin, being a trachytle lava
which has been rendered light l»y the
escape of gasses when In a molten
state. It is found on most of the
shores of the Tyrrhenian sea and else
where, but Is at present almost ex
clushely obtained from :ho little Is
land of Mp.trl. M. rt of the volcanoes
of l.lpurl have ejected pumaceou*
rocks, but the !•» -' stooo is all fh> pro
duct of one nici.n.ilu, Monte ('htrlcu,
nearly 2,IKk> feet t> heigh with Us
two accessory •’ U<n The district In
I which the ptiui’ • is excnvatml covers
1 an urea of lh;e square miles. If has
1 been calculated that about I 9#W hands
j a re engaged in this Industry, atm of
I whom Sie employed lu i »lr ill lug Ills
mineral Puml.. i* brought to the
1 surface lu larjp Ida* Its nr lit banket*
j and I itrrN thus either to the
nrigtibui t’lg village or to the seashore
I tn lie taken there In boa’# The *>up
! ply la said to lie practically Inexhaust
ible. Poialce u it* d u«» merely lor
j deacatns an 1 »C«I It lag put (Mist*, blit
j also far pil tlitiis In sungeroiia na b »
I hence the fart tkn the powdered pom
1 i..» ' Spurted •’treed* in weight tb«
> btm k pumice ib’w*«n twenty and
* ihiiis nicieha i*e >re engaged In tko
pumice trade la the uland latnoutt
New «.
bo M«mke» l»i«’«* fur Mom
Hbr’ lb* *• • I • lb *«• ’I Ike |Str
i aoiua ike«r v !
||e "X#. I do Mi tad. a Sal b start
1 I do sot b*ti«*« the! ass was Who •«•(
I Ism iked UP b*t family tree Wilt adnMt
■ that he iv«r 4ii? m*mh' v* ]
t <il a let
|| 14 Mil!* Cl tU‘ - hp M* 1# * #f l li#4* *• |
f f|*> «^tiin |» <rr «**. |t* sifc* 4. «»n» vf Mi#
\ |M*» “ III* ft *ii#t 4 ffi#'
, i' m|**4 Nis b 1
WHEELBARROWS.
31.» !•* In ’Many I)ifr«*r<iit * f for .« IVid©
\ arli «y of (
It might seem that a wheelbarrow
was a very simple tiling, but wheel
barrows are made In many different
styles and f ir a wide variety of uses.
Wheelbarrows are made of wood, of
Iron, and of steel. Much the greater
number art* made of wood, but the
number of metal wheelbarrows used
Ik all the time growing, and among
these the proportion of steel wheel
barrows is constantly increasing. The
wheelbarrows of which the greatest
number are sold are of the kinds used
by contractors on canal and railroad
work. Next to these In numbers
sold are the wheelbarrows made
for mining uses and after them
come the wheelbarrow;; made for farm
purposes. And there are wheelbarrows
especially made for sawdust, for oys
ters, for sand, and for stone: wheel
barrows for chemical works, and wheel
barrows made to carry leaves In. and
wheelbarrows for green brick and for
dry brick, and wheelbarrows for mall,
and for corn, and for staves or bark,
and wheelbarrows for | 'e metal, and
for coke, and for mortar. Most wheel
barrows have blit one wheel, but some
are made with two wheels, ami some
with three, anil some with four; and
there are wheelbarrows that are made
With springs; and there are some kinds
of stone barrows that are made with
out legs. Many of the regular styles of
wheelbarrows are made In various
sizes, and wheelbarrows are also made
for special uses. A great many thou
sands of wheelbarrows are used In this
country and other thousands are ex
ported. The I'tilted States send wheel
barrows to all the Spanish-A merli n n
countries and to South Africa and Aus
tralia.
LORD KELVIN
lirgii'iU li)« Own I'aroer n« n
lulliirr.
Tlu* celebration of the Jubilee <:f Lord
Kelvin (even now better known to tlx
older generation an Sir William Tbom
son) nr professor of natural philosophy
In Glasgow university has taken plan
recently in Glasgow and has produced
u perfect flood of the heartiest congrat
ulations from the scientific men of all
parts of the world, says the London
Spectator. Never was there a greater
unanimity of sincere and eager admira
tion, from England, from all parts of
Europe, from the United States and
from Japan, where his pupils and ad
mirers abound. Hut perhaps the most
striking feature of the Jubilee was the
the perfect modes1}' and even humility
of lxmi Kelvin's own speech In
reply to the lord provost's congratula
tions
"One word,” lie said, "characterise.',
the most strenuous of the efforts
for the advancement of sclenrsj
that I have made persevering
!y through fifty-five years; that word
Is failure; I know no more of electric
or magnetic force, or of the relatione
between ether, electricity and ponder
able matter or of chemical affinity than
I knew or tried to teach my students of
natural philosophy fifty years ago in
my first session ag professor. Sonic
ililng of sadness must come of failure."
True, but the r is something of sub
limity in the confession, as well as in
the elevation of Lord Kelvin's concep
tion of what success would have meant
when he regards such a scientific ca
reer of constant and fertile discovery a.
has attracted the admiration and al
most the vererallon of all the world, at
nothing better than failure in disguise
Dingrarc* for llail <ira«luat«>.
When a graduate of Cambridge Uni
versity, England, commits a crime, th*
authorities of I lit university take his
degree from him and strike his name
from the rolls of the alumni.
To Help KpailUll KoIiIUtm.
The leading playwrights of Spain
have agreed to give each the receipts ol
one performance of ills most populai
work for the benefit of invalid soldier*
reluming from Culm.
IIitt (iucM.
Kerry: "laitnmc see; what do they
iall that new submarine boat?"
Wallace "It ain't the Texas you art
thinking of. is it?” I kit roll Krec Press
PLYING CHIPS.
Men never like gloomy or cynUal wo
men
Never offer a looking glass to a blm
man.
The sin «t a moment may blight tin
w hold life.
Woman's most fascinating ebarui i
nmuraliMMM.
KaUchtxt.1 may havt Its hour, hoi i
ho u» futors
Hotel mlv ice is a poor Ihutg for .
hungry family.
ft* give ami grudge ts no butter that
Ml l« at »M.
Me* who strike in tie ■ ui< i -t• u
It miM Ik* mark
III ih* wimM will b*ai lh« m«i
whom furiunn buffets.
Ths It I lb things uvvlh Okv.l toh (Mil
lives of joyful stnugib
II* that walls fur d*ad won s sheep
may Wag gw bsr**««••
Van con *ih all »W n «*m* i
you only *»•* gutawi btlittlt
l.tghtnmg uitlt sink** tub# In tb(
Mtu plate It bu t rtf-***4IV
lilts Meat wm*i in lot. nusttf ibu
pi i ugnss whecuto yaw uul ill It.
Ysnliy Htiln it* «lu wm* rh ng
against int tins)sou than itssit
v\ h«n a min's vast la thmadhiru It i
an envy thing ta yi h a b >1* n It.
h*vur say <*•• until pu nr* tMI
uljpt thvg If ig la war, h ki |, a'wn*
M
! RENO COUNTY
RHEUMATISM.
NERVOUS DISORDERS IN CAS
TLETON, KANSAS.
sri.n Year, a Sufferer No Itcltcf from
I'hy.h ino. Pink PtlU Work a I'nre
On M'». \iiii T. Oevrnlsh In si» YYeeks.
tHn.ui 'lie liuii'ite, Hutchinson, Kansas.I
‘•If :l ere Is any thing I have entiro faith
in, in the way i f medicine,” said Mrs. Ann
I'. Di venisl). of I'astleton, Keuo County,
Kansas, to n reporter, - it Is Dr. Williams'
I’ink Pills for I’aU People.”
• Why' do you ask well for seven years
I was :> wretched sufferer from nervous
debility and rheumatism. My w rists were
so swollen and my fingers so stiff that 1 got
no sleep at night. My hips, hack hone and
shoulder blades wore so painful if I moved
Hint I would awake screaming with agony,
and a small lump of bono or callous grew
on my spine, which w as exquisitely paluful,
i if I •mi Itc niv hcai t was badly affected, and
the numerous physicians whom I consulted
vere all of one mind, and that was that
my days were numbered, and they could do
me no good.
■ I could not leave my bed without help,
anil once l*y fur three week* in ono posi
l.lon and would not have liecii sorry if
ileatli liad ended my suffering*, When one
day ulsmt three mouths ago, sonic one read
to me from the ItutehiiiHon (ja/ettn uii ac
count of a wonderful ctice of a patient
w hose ills were somewhat similar to mine,
by using Dr. Williams' )'lute Pills for Pule
I 'eople.
• I was struck by w lint I lietird and pro
cured a supply i t Pink Pills about six
weeks ago, iiinl hud not got through the
tirst box wln'ii I received extraordinary
relief. l.opc returned and I continued with
t he pills, every day adding to my store of
health. My nerves became tranquil, the
rlioumntie pains begun to leave me. palpi
tation of the heart cease,I, my kidney * and
liver grew iinrinal. and though I am atill
taking Pink Pill-. I am almost well.
•I can toil you of three persons to whom
I have recommended Pink Pill* all of
< :i-,i Iftt.ii win* :iii* MifTfrifi' with hoart.
«1 iflU-n11.% Mrs. Is Mnvtli, Mr. .Inlin l’lir
cril and Mr. Main r. and they will tell you
what J’ink fills diil tor them, ami they
also know what they did for me.'1
Ilr. Williams' I'iuk Pills coutiiui, In ft con
densed form, nil the elements necessary to
give new tile and richness to t In? blood and
restore shattered nerves. 'I hoy are also a
■ pol itic fortroubles |ict>ullar to females, such
as suppressions, it reunlaritles and u 11 forms
of Weakness. They hiiild up tile blood, and
restore the gloxx of health to pale ami
sallow cheeks. In men they effect a radical
cure in all eases arising from mental worry,
over-work or excesses of whatever nature,
l'ink I’ills are sold ill Istxes (never in loose
bulk) at rat emits u tsixoi • i>. luxes fortii.lM),
and may lie had ef all dnivglsts.or direct by
mail from Dr. Williams' Medicine Company,
Hcbeiicctady, N. V.
Swiss l.'ggs.
< Ireuse either a silver or pretty fire
proof dish. Cut up four ounces of
cheese in slices anti grate two ounces
finely. Arrange the slices in the bot
tom "of the d.sh. sprinkle over a little
pepper; then break in four eggs, taking
care not to break the yolks, sprinkle
over a little pepper and salt. Then
place tho grated cheese in a layer over
I lie eggs, and place one ounce of but
ter. cot in small pieces, on the top.
Hake in a tjuick oven for ten or fifteen
minutes. Serve very hot. If liked, a
teaspoon of parsley may he mixed
with the grated cheese. -Philadelphia
Hedger.
Sul/.er Seed Co. Ahead.
So enormous Ims been (lie demand for
Sal/.er s seeds In Texas Dial the John A.
Sul/.er reed <*o. lai <'riis-e. Win , sent out a
special train on January IIIIi, loaded with
seed notaloes, grasses and clover, seed
com. outs. etc . io be distributed among its
southern customers.
Wasted energy.
••Say. who is that man.1'’
••His name is Kadgers.’’
‘•I know his name, but what is his
occupation?'’
■ lie’s a detective.-’
‘•lireat Scott! 1 met him at a recep
tion the other evening and after I was
introduced to him I put in half an hour
of tlie hardest work of my life trying
to keep from indulging in my abomina
ble habit of swearing. 1 ' thought lie
yvas a clergyman.’-—Chicago Tribune.
iJeafnrft* C annot Me Cure-I
by local applications as they cannot reach
tIk* diseased portion »»f the car. Thera Is
only one way to euro deafness, and that
Is by constitutional remedies. Deafness N
caused by an inflamed condition of the
mucous fining of tie* 1-ustachlan Tube.
When this tula* is inflamed you have a
r umbling sound, or imperfect hearing, and
v.'hen it is entirely closed deafness i* the
result, and unless the inflrnnution cun
be taken out and this tube restored to its
normal condition, hearing will he de
stroyed forever; nlue ca-es out of tenure
caused by cacurrh. which is nothing but
an inflamed condition of the mucous sur
faces.
We will give one Hundred Dollars for
any case of Deaf non* ■ cau**«d by catarrh*
(fiat- cannot be cured by Halls Catarrh
Cure. M»nd for clrcula r*. free.
I .! <111 M Y X c»» . Toledo, O.
hold by druggists. 7.V
hull’s I Ulllliy 1*111* are the be i
Itotat by lit* Own Petard.
Casey (confidentially to the foreman)
“OCve bin ufther watehlu' Kerrigan
fpr th' iimht two hour*, an' tlivll a
ehiruke uv wur-ruk hot he <l<>ne In
all that tolnu Fort man "lb' hivina!
Kerrigan wtu Juiu afiher comtn C me
vv|‘ th’ Htme infer mat Ion about yeraUf.
j Yea are bote *1 tsrhaiic*.i fer watchitl
I tua*i>l uv wur-rkin' Puck.
Hr*. \» lU.IUM ’« «.ul IllUl O..UH
uium.ii.iI...,' . «» ••
| Mt >t*iirtl, |r*a4-« * »H%ri V tl eHUahultl*'
lie heft* of the liiltill) th « old weather h
j the one that geC up D4 and havm Dm
J h»e
W id' ItHiouwoi o<*utr »•** ‘4 t nwret
inn h «athatth' » ore guaranteed Mfc\ «.V
K*il thiuwii oil a *« m Mat lira aid n oo
H
———
• 1.00 roK 14 ( I’.STS.
Million* now plant Salzer's seeds,
but million* more should; hence offer.
I pkg. Blsmmk Cucumber.15c
1 pkg. Hound Cilobe licet.10c
1 pkg. Karliest Carrot .10c
1 pkg. Kaiser Wilhelm Lettuce.15c
1 pkg. Karliest Melon .10c
1 pkg. Giant Yellow Onion.15o
1 pkg 14-Dry Radish .10c
3 pkg*. Brilliant Flower Seeds,.... .15o
Now all of above 10 packages, In
cluding our mammoth plant and seed
catalogue, are mailed you free upon
receipt of only 14 cents' postage.
25 pkg*. Karliest Vegetable Seed.$1.00
21 Brilliant Blooming Plunts.*1.00
John A. Salzer Seed Co., La Crosse,
WIs._w.o.
It III ( 14* eft I lirt.llU I'olfk.
In the ringles* curtain pole made
l>y an Knglisb ftrtn there is an under
cut groove in the under side of the
pole, in which work a set of metal
eyes, which hang out of the opening
of the groove, and coll in it on small
rollers working in the undercut por
tion of the groove. It is ingenious
and simple, and certainly seems like
lv to work morn smoothly than the
ordinary curtain ring.
To <»**» Out of I In* War
When trouble is coming. is obviously the
purl of common sense. An o struct loo of
the bowels t* usurious obstruction to heullh.
'I o gel tills out of the way Is :• n ru.sy mat
ter with the thorough laxative, llostcttur*
Momurli i It tots, w filch, although it affords
relief, never grilles and convulses like a
drastic purgative Dyspepsia, malarial,
Uliluvy and rheumatic ailments tindneri
oiieiiess yield to tlilsgeitiui family medicine.
Heller Times Coming.
Farmer Brown, aft *r fourteen hoars
i»t buying Never mind. Tommy;
hayin' don't la-t forever. Just re
member that winter's cornin' soon,
un’nothin’to do hut saw wool an'
’tend the cuttle an' go to school an
study nights."- Harper's Bazar,
Jt *T try « lie Im of CasenretH. t andv
cathartic, the tine-t. lixer mid towel regu
lator made.
Nearly every man believe* that fate Its*
a grudge agulust him.
! IT'S CURES
j| THAT COUNT. !
> Many eocullcd remedies are 1 ,
I pressed on the public attention J <
i on account of their cluimcd < |
! 'i large sales, but sales cannot J,
ijj determine values. Sulessimply ,1
'i) argue good salesmen, shrewd
\<> puffery, or enormous advertis- i
II lug. It’s cures that count. It
] » is cures that arc counted on by i[
Ayer’s Sarsaparilla. Its sales S
i J might be boasted. It has the
j \f world for its market. But >■ [
!;< sales prove nothing. We point jj>
' ’ only to the record of Ayer’s ,-j'
\Sarsaparilla, as proof of its " \
f merit: ' i
i 50 YEARS <
; OF CURES. ;
Comfort to
California.
Kvcry Thursday afternoon*
it tourist sleeping car for
Denver. Salt, Lake <*ity. hau
Francisco, and Lom Angel*.
leuves Omaha and Lincoln*
via the liurllngton lloute.
It if* carpeted, upholstered
in rattan, hn* .spring scat'
and hacks and is provided
with curtains, bedding, to*
els f oan.elc. An experienced
excursion conductor ami a
mi I formed i it 11 man porter
accompany It throtfgh to the
Pacific Coast.
While neither as expen
sively finished nor u> line to
look at as a pnlacesleepnr.lt
Is just as good to ride In. t ec
otid class tickets arc honored
and the price of a berth,*Id* *
ciioutrh and'big enough for
t wo, Is only * >.
I or a folder giving full
pa i t icitlars write to
J. Pn \x< if , tie,ti l I'asVr Agent, Omaha.Neb.
gr A11T1: ||oy( kntiky orn.
feXWATERPROOF.';:;;^'.^
No HL’NT nor H VI'TIJ;. tin rir r.
A DurablefubMlmic for Pln«trr on wnlli.
\VRtrr l'r»U NbmlItinn "f *»»**•* niat«rj»:y4ir
liftt A ■ hi'twct i*» t b*miri«rWrilufunmiop •• wAc,
lb..mi mMi.i.uwonviK».,a»m,.U'
SMOKE YOUR MEAT WITH
MAUSERS LIQUID EXTRACTirSH8^
! i k£i«cuu*. E KRAUSEHA BR0.MILTON. PA.
PENSIONS, PATENTS. CLAIMS.
JOHN W MORRIS, WASHWSTIM 0 C.
uu f Ma»l«4* U *. fiMlN lar«44
OMAHA STOVE REPAIR WORKS
rich A*|>«i<i 9m* k<*4 »l mO.
• M»7 UOI M.IH »'f., XCfl.
npinu^PORUNKENNESS
Ul IvSflr. ,4 1.141* VrLrUp
Dr, Kay’slun| Ba?m
W. N. U OMAHA. No- ft *IHw7.
Uboo wriiimi tu «iltrrib»K bmifely
liliw I Ilf* |»4*|*p 9%
{SPRAINS? £S”-=1
larr.'S'ST. Jacobs oil - I
ji»* U«n you |»%U Uk L'rulvlic*i«w ay, lihii|iI«UI) vuml. J
lo* au
V
