A CONFESSION.
I've been down to the city. an' I've seen the 'lectrie lights.
The twenty -story buildin's an' the other stuuuiu' siht;
I've st-en the trolley ear a-rubiii' madly down the street.
An' ail the place a-tookin' like a fairyland complete.
But I'd rather see the big tree that' a grow in' up to home.
An' watch the stars a -twinklin' in the blue an lofty dome;
An' I'd rather hear the wind that goes a-singiu' pat the door
Than the traffic of the city, with Its bustle an' iu roa.
I reckon I'm peculiar, an' my tastes is kind o' low.
Bat what's the use denyln' things that certainly Is so?
I went up to a concert, an" I beard the music there.
It sounded like angelic harps a-floatin' through the air.
Yet. spite of all Its glory, an' the gladness an' acclaim.
If I stopped to think a minute, I was homesick Jes' the same;
An' I couldn't help eonfessln', though It seems a curious thing.
That I'd rather hear a robin sweetly pipin' in the spriug.
Washington Star.
ONLY A
ecaoooeoeeoooeooooooooccoi
F all poor men the most to be
pitied la the poor rich man. The
man In absolute poverty can be
helped; but for the man who Is poof
with his coffers full of gold there is no
earthly help none, unless something
can get away down into his teart and
open the way for the Incoming of sun
light and warmth. Such a transfor
mation I once knew, and I will tell
you how it was wrought. It was done
by only a little child.
Kufus Grote was really and truly
a miser, though he hud probably never
acknowledged the fact to himself. At
the age of sixty he lived In a close,
small, shabby bouse, in a narrow
street down town, though up town
where the streets were broad, and
where green trees grew, he owned a
whole brick block, the rental of which
yielded what might have been a mag
nifleent income for any man. In early
life Rufus Grote had been disappoint
ed; mi while yet a man be hail shut
himself up within his shell and
through all the years of his manhood
he had neither asked nor given auy
love nor friendship. He took his us
ance even to the pound of flesh, if it
was due him by the bond, and he was
s ready to discharge all bonded obli
gations. One evening. Just at dusk, a coach
topped at Rufus Grote's door, and a
lady, dressed In black, and accompa
nied by a child, alighted therefrom,
ml plied the rusty Iron knocker. The
miser answered the summons, and de
manded the applicant's business.
"Uncle Kufus," said the woman, "I
am Mary Sanford, and this Is my
child. Will you give me shelter until
I can And work?"
Mary Sanford was the only daugh
ter of Rufus Grote's dead sister. He
had heard of her husband's death, and
he had shudderingly asked himself
more than once if it might not be pos
sible that his widowed niece would
call upon him for assistance. And
now the dreaded blow had fallen.
What was he to do? Had he followed
the first impulse, he would have
turned the woman and her child away
with a word; but that would have
been Inhuman. He was caught in a
trap. He had to open his door wider,
and let them in. And when they were
In he was forced. In common decency,
to go out and buy a loaf of bread and
tome cheese.
Mary Sanford was thirty-live; a
light, pale-faced, pretty woman; and
what of beauty she possessed was due
more to the reflex action upon her face
nd manner of her native goodness
than to any outward grace of feature.
Her child, a girl of nine years, was
;alled Flora. She was a plump, dim
pled, sunny-haired and sunny-faced
child, with the light of a tender, loving
heart sparkling in every feature. She
was really and truly a thing of beauty
nd perfect joy.
After v&ilug the off-ad iiu cheese,
nd drinking cold water with it, Mary
Sanford told to Rufus Grote the story
of her husband's death how he had
luffered long, and how be had left her
a utter destitution.
"But," she concluded, as she saw a
cloud upon her uncle's face, "I am not
come to be a burden upon yott. Mrs.
Maynard will be In the city In a few
days, and will give me work."
"Ugh! What kind of work?" grunt
ed Rufus.
"I shall keep house for her."
Later in the evening, by the dim
light of a single tallow candle, Flora
crept to the old man's side and climb
ed into his lap. For the moment be
bad a thought of putting her away, as
be would have put away an Insinuat
ing cat, but he did not do it So she
kept on until she had got both bunds
upon bis shoulders.
"You are my Uncle Rufus?" she
aid. with a nuivering, eager smile.
"I suppose so," answered the man.
forcing out the reluctant words.
"I haven't got a papa any more.
Mayn't I kiss yon before I go to bed?"
The little warm arms were around
his neck, and the kiss waa upon his
cheek. The child waited a moment as
though for a kiM In return, but the
lid not get It, and she slipped down
nd went with ber mother to the little
dark room where Rufus Grote had
given op to their use his own hard,
gam bed.
for himself the boat bad planned to
Qui blanket npon the doer In the
Cvteg jmnv He bad slept there be
' ft eold alees then again.
tin c3 c Snfaa Grote's heart waa
tt C ac3 af aOar haarta. A aeed
t-:r txJ Csck t erase wmU
&D0DOfK0O00ODg
CHILD.
And root there either good or evil.
In all his manhood's life so warm a
thing as that childish kiss had not
touched his cheek. He did not think
of it so much until he was alone iu
the dense darkness; and theu when he
could see nothing .else, he could S'-e
that sunny face, and the musical chir
rup sounded again In his ears. At
first he would have been glad to
lieve that the child's mother bad in
structed her in this, but when he look
ed over all the circumstance, he knew
It could not have been; and before he
slept he was glad the child had come
to him of her own sweet Impulse.
lion the hard floor, with only a
single blanket for bedding. Kufus
Grote did not sleep so soundly as was
his wont. He dreamed, and In his
dream be saw a cherub, and felt cher
ubic arms about his neck, with kisses
upon his cheek. And he said to him
self in his dreams;
"Surely, I cannot be such an ogre
If these sweet beings can love me."
In the morning Kufus Grote was
up very early. He had thought the
night lefore that he had bread and
cheese enough for on-akfast; but after
the night's dream he took now
thoughts. Without exactly compre
hending the feeling, the sense of ntter
louellness and selfishness had given
place to a warmer sense of companion
ship and fraternity. He put his band
to the cheek where the Impress of the
child's kiss had fallen, and a new res
olution came to his mind. He went out
to a neighboring street comer and pur
chased tea and sugar and butter, and
new warm breakfast rolls, and a small
can of milk.
He had just deposited these articles
upon the table when Mrs. Sanford
made her appearance.
"Good-morning, Uncle Rufus."
Had the host caught that sound
when he first arose It would have
startled him; but It fell very softly
upon his ears now. He had been ax
Tcislng, and earned the salute.
"Good morning. Mary," returned
Kufus; and so odd was It, that the
very tones of his own voice surprised
1:1m.
"What can I do for you this morn
.ng, uncle? May I get your break
fast for you?"
"I will build a fire," said the man,
"and then if you please, you may make
i cup of tea."
The fire was buip, and then he
showed where his dishes were.
Mary Sanford was an accomplished
housekeeper, and she could accommo
date herself to circumstances very nar
row. While she was busy a ray of
fresh sunshine burst into the room,
lighting up the dingy waU, and mak
ing golden with Its light the atms
phere of the place. It was little
Flora, bright, joyous and Jubilant,
thinking only of love In the first hour
of her waking from refreshing sleep.
Without a word only a ripple of glad
ness dropping from her lips she went
to where the old man had just sat
down in the corner, and crept up again
into bis lap.
"I can't reach your cheek, uncle,"
she laughed, "without getting up you
are so big and I am so little."
And then she kissed blm as she
bad done the night before; but not as
on the night before did Rufus Grote.
With a movement almost spasmodic
so strange was It for him he drew
the child back to him, and imprinted
a hearty kiss upon her round cheek.
And the words "God bless you. lit
tle onel" fell from his lips before he
knew it.
Verily the crust was broken. But
had any good seed fallen upon the
heart?
What an odd scene for the miser's
home! A really good breakfast a
tabic tastefully laid the fumes from
the teapot fresh and fragrant and
ihe surroundings cheerful.
After breakfast Rufus Grote was
forced to go away on business. And
on that day he concluded arrangements
for the leasing of a building which
was to return him ten thousand dol
lars year; and he bad meant when
the business was done, that be would
be poorer than erer, and live on less
than heretofore, so that be might lay
np more. On this same day one of
his houses was vacated up town a
dwelling on one of the broad streets
where the green trees grew. He saw
bis agent and ordered blm to let the
house aa quickly aa possible.
That evening, wblie sirs. Sanford
waa oet, flora came to Rofos G rote's
side, and looked earnestly np Into bis
faaa.
"Uncle." she said. arrni quaint seri
ousness, "dun't you want me to get
up into your lap?"
"Why do you sk that?" demanded
the old man.
"Mamma said I mustn't. She said
you wouldn't like it."
"What made ber think I shouldn't
like itr
"Because she said you wasn't happy;
and she cried when she said that ber
little girl mustn't make her Uncle
Rufus dislike her."
"And what did you say to that?"
asked Rufus Grote, with awakening
Interest.
"I told mamma that I would put my
arms around your neck, and bug and
kiss you. and see If I couldn't make
you love me. And If you loved me. I
knew you would let me sit Ln your
lap."
When Mary Sanford came iu. half
an hour later, she found ber child In
Uncle Rufus" lap. her sunny bead pil
lowed upon bis bosoin, and his strong
arms entwining her.
The seed had fallen, and had taken
root!
Three days afterward Kufus Crote
saw his agent, and told blm that he
need not hurry about reutiug the
empty house up town.
On the evening of the same day
Mary SHnford came ln with a letter
In her hand, and found Flora nestled
in her uncle's arms.
"Uncle Rufus," she said, "I have
rei-elved a letter from Mrs. Maynard.
Sbe will te at bouie day after to-morrow."
"And she wants you to take charge
of her house?"
"Yes."
"Very well. Walt till she con es."
And the old man held the little child
in bis arms until it was time to go to
bed.
On the following morning Uncle
Kufus told Mary that he wanted her
to take a ride with him during the
forenoon.
She said she would be at his serv
ice. And later a fine coach drew up lie
fore the door, and Uncle Kufus came
in and bade Mary make ready, and to
make Flora ready also.
They rode up town, and when they
stopped Uncle Kufus handed them out
beore a house with great chestnut
trees growing in the yard and ujon
the sidewalk. And he led them Into
the house. And ln the broad, hand
some riflor he turned and spoke, hold
ing Flcra by the hand.
"Mary." he said, "this little child
has promised to make her old uncle
happy, and I will not give ber up.
This bouse is mine. If you will come
and help me take care of It, I will
live In It. What say you?"
What could sbe say? She saw the
new light upon her uncle's face; and
when he took the child In his arms
and held the sunny bead close upon his
bosom, she saw the blessing of the
coming time. She said, with a burst
of tears
"Dear uncle, If Flora and I can
make you happy, you may command
ns both."
There was wonder up town and
there was wonder down town when
Kufus Grote appeared a well dressed,
smiling, happy mac-.
And In the mansion beneath the
shade of the great chestnut trees there
was pence and Joy. An angel, ln the
shape of a little child, had touched
a hitman heart long burled in cold
darkness, and brought It forth to love
and blessing. Waverley Magazine.
M08T MEN ARE CO WAR 08.
As Evidenced When a Paaaeuger Train
la Held L'p by Robbers.
If you want to find out what cow
ards the majority of men are, all you
have to do is to rob a passenger train.
I don't mean lieeause they don't resist
I'll tell you later on why they can't
do that but it makes a man feel sorry
for them the way they lose their
heads. Big, burly drummers and farm
ers and ex-soldiers and high-collared
dudes and sjiorts that, a few mlnuleg
before, were filling the car with noise
and bragging, get so scared that their
ears flop.
I opened the door of the sleeper
and stepped inside. A big, fat old man
came wabbling up to me, puffing and
blowing. He had one coat sleeve on
and was trying to put his vest on over
that. I don't know who he thought
I was.
"Young man, young mun," says he,
"you must keep cool and not get ex
cited. Above everything, keep cool."
"I can't" ays I. "Excitement's Just
eating me up." And then I let out a
yell and turned loose my forty-five
through the skylight. "
The old man tried to dive into one
of the lower berths, but a screech
came out of It, and a bare foot
that took him Iu the breadbasket and
Winded blm on the floor. I saw Jim
coming In the other door, and I hol
lered for every !ody to climb up and
lino up.
They commenced to scramble down,
and for a while we had a three-ringed
circus. The men looked as frightened
and tame as a lot of rabbits In a deep
snow. They had on, on an average,
about a quarter of a suit of clothes
and one shoe apiece. One chap was
sitting on the floor of the aisle, looking
as If be were working a hard sum In
arithmetic. He was trying, very sol
emn, to pull lady's No. 2 sboe on Ills
No. 0 foot
The ladles didn't stop to dress. They
were so curious to see real, lire train
robber, bless 'em, that they just wrap
ped blanket and sheets around them
selves and came oat, squeaky and
fidgety looking.
They always show more curiosity
and sand than the men do. MeClure's.
It Is the grave cases of a physician
that "bene t the undertaker.
X
FAVORITFS I
' ,
! tell I !
The Moaeyleaa Mam.
la there uo secret place on the fare of
the earth
Where charity dwelleth, where virtue
hath birth.
Where bosoms is mercy and kindneas
will heave.
And the poor sod the wretched shall ask
and receive?
Is there no place at all where a knock
from the poor
Will bring a kind angel to open the door?
i iti! search the wide world, wherever you
ran.
There is no open door for a moneyless
man.
ilo look iu yon hall where the chande
lier' lifht
Orivea off with Its splendor the darkness
of night;
Where the rich hinging velvet, in shad
owy fold,
Sweeps gracefully down with Its trim
mings of gold;
And the mirror of silver take up and
renew
In long lighted vistas the 'wildering
view;
Go there at the banquet and find if you
can
A welcoming mile for the moneyless
ni tin.
Go look in yon church of the cloud-reaching
spire.
Which gives bark to the sun his tame
look of fire,
Where the arches and columns are gor
geous within.
And the walls seem as pure as a soul
without sin;
vVnlk down the long sisle ee the rich
and the great,
in the pomp grid the pride of their world
ly estate;
Walk down in your patches and find if
you ran.
Who open a pew for a moneyless man.
Go look to your judge in his dark flowing
gown,
Willi the scales wherein law weigheth
equity down:
Where he frowns on the weak and smiles
on the stmng,
nd punishes right while he justifies
wrong;
Where jurors their lips to the Bible have
laid
To render a verdict they've already
made;
jo there in the court room and find if
you enn
Any law for the cause of a moneyless
man.
Go, look in the banks, where Mammon
has told
3i hundreds and thousands of silver and
gold;
Where, safe from the hands of the starv
ing and poor
Lies pile upon pile of the glltteriug ore;
Walk up to their counters ah, there
jou may stay
Till your limbs shall grow old and your
hair shall turn gray,
.And you'll find at the bank not one of
the clan
With money to lend to a moneyless man.
Then go to your hovel no raven hss fed
The wife who has suffered too long for
her bread;
Kneel down by her pallet and kiss the
death frost
From the lips of the angel your poverty
lost;
Then turn in your agony upward to God
And bless while it smites you the chast
ening rod;
And you'll find at the end of your life's
little span
There's a welcome above for a moneyless
man.
Henry Thompson Stanton.
80ME ODD RAILROAD RULE8.
Curious Early Eiperlences in Trans
portation in Pennsylvania.
Some of the regulations ln force on
the earliest railroads built In Pennsyl
vania read very queerly In these days
it "limited" and "flyers," says the
Boston Transcript. A number of them
ire quoted ln a brief paper read before
'.be Knglneers' Society of Western
..;; ny y fi i m nn n ry experiences 2
iransportatlon by Antes Snyder, and
ibstracted ln part ln the Scientific
American supplement. Says this paper:
"When the common wealth opened
he Philadelphia and Columbia Kail
way the theory was that the State fur
nish the roadway ami that any one
who pleased could furnish bis own ve
hicle and motive power und use the
railway whenever he wished by paying
;be State tolls for Its use. Just as the
turnpikes of the day were used. But
It was soon discovered that a certain
character of vehicles was needed and
that rules and regulations as to 'times
ind manner of using the railways were
Ihsolntely necessary to effect their sue
Knsful operation. The ordinary ship
pers found It too expensive to fit them
selves with the necessary plant and
that they could get this transportation
lone by large and well-equipped shlp
)crs much more cheaply than they
uld do it themselves, so that ln prac
tice the business drifted Into the bands
f a few individuals and companies,
who did this service for the many.
I'he railway as constructed was lntend
id for the horse a a motive power,
Jiough the locomotive was being Intro
luced as an experiment shortly after
Jie railway was completed. The fol
lowing among the rules and regula
tions adopted by the canal commission
(or the regulation of the railway may
be of Interest
" 'Sec. 22. No car shall carry a great
ir load than three tons on the Colum
ns and Philadelphia Railway, nor
more than three and a half tons on the
Portage Railway, nor shall any burden
rar travel at a greater speed than live
bllea per hour, unless the car body
ind load shall bo supported on good
rtesi springs.'
"'Sec. U. It shall be the duty oi
the conductors of cars moving wit!
leas speed upon the railways, upon no
tice by ringing a bell, blowing a borl
or otherwise, of the approach of a loco
motive engine or other car moving in
the same direction at a greater sjeeL
to proceed with all possible dispatch
to the first switch in the course of theii
passage, and pass off said track nul l
said locomotive engine or other far
moving at greater speed can pass by.
i The conductors of the slower cars ar
directed to open and close the swltche
so as to leave tbem in proper order.
Any person who shall refuse or iieglecl
to comply with the provisions of thll
regulation shall, for every offense, for
feit and pay the sum of $10.'
"It must have been a very Interest
ing snd novel sight. Indeed, when the
horse and the locomotive weer used In
discriminately on the same track and
were struggling for supremacy as the
future motive power of onr railroads,
and the approach of a locomotive wa l
heralded by the tooting of a horn. Even
at that time the right of way was giv
en to the fast horse."
SOME SWEARING DEFENSIBLE.
Many Great and Good Men Have Used
an Ocraalonal Oath.
According to the Anti-Profanity
League the swearing habit Is "the mi
tional evil." Undoubtedly the use f
profanity Is extremely prevalent, I
person needs merely to keep his ear
open on the street to learn this, ssyt
the Boston Transcript. But whether il
is so general as to Justify one in term
ing it the national evil Is a matter of
opinion. Not all swearing, moreover,
Is wholly Indefensible. There are vari
ous kinds of swearers and It will not
do to lump tbem In one class with a
single label. Besides the bubltual and
commonplace swearers, whose profan
ity is mere redundant and colorles
verbiage, and the vulgar and diffusa
swearers, whose oaths are rank and
noisome, one must recognize also as i
distinct category the discreet and mod
erate swearers who employ an occa
sional oath with fine emphasis and ar
tistic effect.
Many great and good men In-long tc
the last class. Even the father of liii
country Is said to have sworn vigor
ously when the emergency seemed to
require departure from his customary
rule of unvarnished speech. This or
of discriminating profanity Is vastly
different from the causeless and gra
tuitous swearing of habitual and vul
gar oathmotigers. indeed, the man
who now and then vents his emotioni
in an oath is rather preferrble to tin
one who always bottles up his feelings,
however strong the provocation to
break forth. A robust ebullition Is bet
ter than Ingrowing profaultj. Slli-nc
may be as profane as words under cer
tain circumstances. A saying of Jo
seph Choate occurs to the settler la
this connection. A noted prelate wai
once playing golf with Mr. Choate, and
after foozling a tee shot egreglously.
stood looking at the ball for several
moments. After waiting for the bishop
to hay something. Mr. Choate remark
ed: "Bishop, that -as the profanest si
lence I ever heard."
As for the Autl-Profanlty I(;gue,
the purpose of the organization Is cer
tainly worthy, but somehow the settler
cannot develop a high degree of en
thusiasm In such a cause, lie is a bit
weary of antl crusades of all sorts.
Movements for the suppression of this
and that and what not fail to Interest
him profoundly. It seems to blm that
what Is needed in the field of social re
form Is not so much the suppression
of bad things as the promotion of good
tilings. Reformers should eoticentiat
their energies on positive and construc
tive work, rather than purely negative
and restrictive undertakings.
WAY8 OF GEORGE GOULD.
He Keeps Himself In Good Health b
Athletic Exercise.
Oeorge J. Gould, physically, Is In
striking contrast to not a few of the
directors of the Gould companies who
were so actively identified with the
late Jay Gould. George Gould's fond
ness for sport and athletic games
keeps him in excellent physical condi
tion, sayg the New York Mail. He al
most invarlubly arrives at his oflice In
the Western Union building, VX
Broadway, a little before 10 a. rn. Ills
pace Is swift and only a good walker
can keep up with hlrn. Often ln the
coldest weather he comes with his
overcoat on bis arm.
Immediately tiou reaching bis desk
he throws off not only his undercoat,
but his waistcoat as well, and pitches
Into a vast amount of work. Frequent
ly during the day Mr. Gould may be
seen passing rapidly through the corri
dors of the Western Union building In
this same negligee attire.
Not long ago a midday meeting of
the directors of the Texas and Pacl;lc
Rilroad was called, and Russell Silge,
John T. Terry and Sam Sloan, all ac
tive associates of the late Jay Gould,
came down the corridor from George
Gould's oflico, all wearing winter over
coats, although the weather wms
abominably mHd. Mr. Gould appeared
a few minutes lafer minus bis under
coat and waistcoat, and ln this atti.-e
presided at the meeiing, while his aged
confreres, In conventional dress and
holding high silk bats with a greit
deal of dignity, unanimously rutilled
bis propositions.
Mr. Gould rarely gets further down
town than the Harrlman offices, at VM
Broadway. He could easily pnss
through Wall street without being gen
erally recognised. Even some of the
Wall street reporters do not know blm
by eight
Speaking of the misfortune of rich
es, there la the woman who Is a good
cook, but who ta rich enough to en
gage kirod girl, fe la a poor una,
Gouverneur Morns bas finished a
,ew novel to which be bas given Lbs
;nalnt title of "A Pagan's Frogr."
Mary Chalmondetey Is completing
he manuscript of a new novel, the
rst to appear from ber pen since the
ublication of ' Red Pottage."
Miss Myrtle Reed, author of "Laveo,
ler and Old lace" snd other books,
tas ln readiness for the press a new
itory to be called "The Master's Vio
In." A new book about Tuskegee and Its
vork. the Joint production of officers
nd former studenta. . is snnounced.
looker T. Washington contributes the
ntroductlon.
The Price of Youth" Is the title of
he new novel by Miss Margery Wlll
ams, which the Macmlllan Company
lave Issued It Is a picture of life In
i New Jersey village.
The Oellverauce." by FJlen Ola
;ow. and Henry llarland s "My Friend
ropers," are the (wo new year
vsiks thst have ho fur Wn most
imminently ls-fure the public.
Or. Walter F. .M'a!"b, author of
The Aaron Burr Con-piracy," Is edlt
ng for Itodd. Mead & Co., the
Memoirs of Senator John H. !U
;nn," the only surviving member of
be Confederate cabinet.
A 1 M Nik the chief charm of which it
0 lie its absolute simplicity and yet b
iiit-d with thrilling Incident and U
cut action Is the way In which the
tublishers announce Charles Hem
itrect's novel, "Flower of the Fort."
Since the publication of the "Woman
Vho Tolls" Mrs. John Van Worst has
lad an enviable position In Paris. She
sas taken up by the academy set. Is
1 contributor to the Revue des Oetit
Hondi-s and has had ber Isjok publish
ed In French and German.
'Helen Grant's Schooldays," Miss
Amanda M. Ooiiglas' holiday story of
est year, will be followed next nu
uiiin by "Helen Grant's Friends," la
slilch Helen lays aside her school aru
'iltions and devotes herself to aiding
her father In his archaeological work.
The most Interesting collection of
Thackeray relics ever brought together
In the jKwsesslon of a well-known
indm dealer. It consists of ihe al
;ims of the author's long time friends,
drs. Brook field and Mrs. Perry. Thesu
lllmms are filled with letters, one long
irlglna! poem and several character!
ic sketches.
I 'odd, Med & Co., New York, an
nounce that they have ready for pub
'Icatlon 1,000 facsimile copies of fhs
Irst edition of the Oeclaratlon of Inde
xndence. The original edition was
.irinted as a broadside, July 5, l"7d, by
lobu Ounlap, of Philadelphia, the otfl
Hal printer to the Continental Con
;ress,
RADIUM, A MIDGET PONY.
Radium Is the name of a black Shet
land pony which, though three yean
old, Is only twenty-nine inches high.
Bred at Seaham Harbor, says the Taf
ler, London, he Is a grandson of thl
champion pony Odin, and throuch hli
mother, is descended from lYitice ol
Thule, XmM of Xoss and other cele
brated Londonderry ponies. Radium
Is by Stormontfleld and Marjorle. II
Is owned by Lady Kstella and Lady
worornea Hope (the latter Is holding
Ibe halter), the sisters of the Marqul
of Linlithgow.
Might Have Iteen Worse.
Bourke Cockran was condemning a
jcrtain popular novel.
"This novel," he said, "Is as pool
tud barren as Elmo County land"
"Is Elmo County land very poor anr?
iarrenr asked one of Mr. Cockrau't
interlocutors.
"Is ltr he said. "Well. I shoni.i
It Is. Once two strangers rode or
Horseback through Elmo County, and
the barrenness of the laud amazed
hern. Nothing but weeds and roeki
verywhere. As they passed a farm
bouse they saw an old man silting In
Hie garden, and they said:
" 'Poor chap! Poor, poverty-stricken
)Id fellow r
"The old man overheard them, and
railed out In a shrill voice:
" 'Gents, I hain't so poor an' poverty-stricken
ss ye think. I don't own
lone o' this land.' "
CrnloaL
"Don't you sometimes think that
tieinhers of Conares waata ...
leal of timer'
"Yes," answered Senator Borghutn,
In some cases It would be cheaper all
round to send 'em their uiiH
rlleace bv mall and let than. . .
toma." Washington star.
- " s