Harrison press-journal. (Harrison, Nebraska) 1899-1905, January 28, 1904, Image 2

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Tb Hirrboa Pics-J .urnai
. a BCKK.it. rnurmrrus
(-"waie Hit? a trust to luck iu world,
some M hers are iucky t get
Soid wen ere like pins; they hart
tttelr good points, ct they are apt to
tick. you.
Spaakiug of airship w do not care
Bt auar ou aujtliiug uxile it ia a
feather tw-d.
It usu't the k& rtt-ooilugk of a young
man that the girl' father otjet to;
Its bis long slaving.
Even the rich hate their sorrows.
!r. a:d Mrs. John D. Kockef-:i r are
grlrv.d lnvauiie their new billi.n tlo!hir
taby !u't a loy.
A faliiuii uote by wireless teies
rnphy from Bogota in that I'urntuia
tat will not le extensively worn In
I'oluiiihla next season.
The inau who tried to shoot the sec
retary of the liank of England is Raid
ta hold iieculiar views on the distribu
tion of wealth. This is obvious.
By dint of unerasing activity Mr.
l'ockefi Her iu able to keep ahe-.id of
Ilia Mil Tiirbell to the eitetit of one
ur two magazine articles all the time.
Information comes from wieniltle
source tint a number of 'extinct ani
amis are mill living." The wonders of
cieuce grow more and more marvel
ous. Cn'ua' empress dowager is tf"in;; to
r- e.-id ?.'. . KJ in bulld.'ng teinihs to
Ilie fods of nee. t'aiitain Hol.ori
wiU runl tlii.s a a shameful waste nf
Mr. Iiockefeller will ive 1M0,
'MJ to aid the dearth for niierolies.
I'eary hhculd contrive some way to
convince Mr. Kocke'eiler th.it the
north poll' is a microbe.
It ia a wonder that no treat limuicier
lias thought of the possibility of orgim
l.:ing the eligible noblemen of Kurciie
Into a trust and forcing American
heiresses to net their coronets at mo
nopoly prl ces.
There is a strong suspicion that
)npuu is lielilnd China, pushing her
forward to slap her great and flood
friend, the Czar. If she does, the
bourfdary line will gallop south a few
thousand more iiiHck.
Edward Atkinson says mud will la?
Ibo substitute for coal, which will en
ible the consumer to issue a new iKs--laratiou
of 1 udcpoudciic e. . If that is
he ease, we shall all be ready to cele
brate tw Fourths of Julv.
member of the Knclish commis
sion which Is n w investigating Amer
ican rducatii n d rondl.bn bus public
'.y esprcs-'sed the w ish tli;it in (he next
Tew decades we ;.ive our attention to
turning out "two or three Milt on, one
jr two D:rjtes mid one or two .siiak-ht-arcs."
We are di-rposeJ to be oblig
ing, but is not the demand rather large?
One-tweifth of the estimated wealth
at the t'liltrd States Is represented at
(he meeting of the board of directors
f the United State Steel Corporation
when nil the direHnrs are presint.
They also repress nt 2UU other compan
ies, operating uiie-half of the railroad
"mileage in the country, and control eir
y po;-atI'ns whose aggregate capitaliza
tion is $!UXU'.
Thu I)uke of Kaxb.iighe is said to be
to hugely disgusted with Americans
'hat he has no di-.slre to renirn to this
lountry. Of course the Duke reserves
in exception in the case of one fair
American. Hut he may dlsmixs from
bis mind any fear that a naval expe
Jition will be sent to bring him back
to America, d'.eply as his absence may
ie deplored. So long as he keeps on
the right side of extradition l.iws, he
la quite safe.
It Is at erne interesting find pathetic
to see how completely he'ple-s. in the
grasp of the bureaucracy, is the nom
inal "autocrat of all the Ihisslas." Ha
bus managed to make It manifest that
he is a perfectly well-merinlng man;
that he desires peace with all , the
world, and particularly that he di sin s
the advancement in civilization, Includ
ing political civilization, of his own
jeople. The more his good Inlentbns
ire manifested the more it is manifest
low absolutely he is without power to
rive effect to them.
"The American people don't mind
jrmfting," remarked an experienced
fbiladelphla politician, "but they hate
endals. They don't kick so much on
Jiggered public contract for a IkmiIp
rard, bat they want the boulevard and
M foaa and no dust." Unfortunately,
Oris politician wasn't far from the
Into. The experience of almost every
ImHcui city will bear him our. This
Willis r attitude of honest Americans
toward dishonest politicians Is souie
Emaa attributed to Indifference toward
hue Main. The voters are "too
It la Mid, to pay proper nil on
to their municipal government.
! ! rrnlfltlAn FmI nnr ulmnlt' in
rkllMLthia boas' statement that
"don't mind grafting."
Vtt ftan pvblle-aplrlted - teople
kaaa prMklii about tn? braeAt
f Csrgi twi bmo have even pone ao
JJIC3 to mj fbat aoap la the real
u.tleiu f cl iliiatioB. WTietber tbi
is or not. It Is well knt)jj 4 1 la
ixotr:K when? the V,'p'e savass
there U no soap. It ha bee a difficult,
iioever, to get iue pHp!eJo accept
-a p as a biet.ing or is a bulwark of
the borne. In apte of the jro.l v.oik
the aiMgxlitifr- have beeu doing by way
of disse-miuating soap adveritseuietita
there are many tu::abttauu of our
splendid country continiie to re
gard oap with MUsplciou if not with
downright abhurreiice. But oUiet!i!g
happened at I-am-aster, Pa., the othr
day that U likely to bring aoap to the
front, to make It dear to the heart of
many a man who bas heretofore pre
ferred to be soaples. Mr. James Wil
n, a burglar gentleman who bad
tx-en shut up in the Lan.-aster jail, xm
ceeded, after stripping anil tboroughiy
soaping himself, lu isijueezing tliroiiga
a hole which had leeu supid to Is
so small that no ma:i could pn.i'i;y
escai. by it. It must have ma le the
burglar shiver wilh horror to thijik of
putting ooap ujsm himself, but there
was nothing c!m- fur him to do if Ur
was to gain bis lilierty. How ea t th-p.-op!e
who have in the past shrunk
from sap i-outinue to regard wilh b
ft-ar or contempt '? The experience c
the Ijiiiiaster burglar hou'd S'-rve t
make soap precious to um-t of tl;iM
who have leeii spurning it. The m.il.
who is an enemy nf soap never a.
teil how sojii lie may be shut in Iwhii!.
ba's. In fact, be usually gets then,
sooner or later, ami always deserve,
to. He should therefore gradually ac
custom himself to soap before the
crisis conies. If Burglar Wilsun's ex
pcrlcnee serve to Increase the p .pi
la r it y of soap hi escape w ill bare li. t:
far from a public misfortune.
The time is nut very far dislan
ben this eiiniilry will have to d;i
with euUgeMieti nt populaiiou in tit
cities and i oiicueiit iuadeuacy oi
the rural population. In!ced, tin- pro,'
letu even now pr.-seiiis itself urgeuji
every summer when farmers ainj
seek help to harvest the crops, thong!
tii'iuands of men are idle in the c!ti
The tendency is more and more towa.i
the citu s. I'ai iners' sons u longt r b
come farmers. They disdain (lie si.iv.
and uneventful routine of life on ti,
farm and as toon as they bet mc the!
own masters they are off to the m are?
city or large town to make their for
lutieti. In a large majtrity of casis
they fare far worse lu the city thai,
they would have fared on the farm.
Ult their ill sui-cesa does not deter otli
ers. The tide flows all one way. Tin
country loy comes to the city, but the
city boy never goes to the country
Fortunately for the nation the agricul
tural population is considerably,
though Inadequately, recruited from
abroad. A large prosrtlon of the im
migrants from northern Knrope. to
gether with some (Jermans and Irish
euier upon farming either fur them
selves or fur others immediately up u,
their arrival in this country. Most ot
the fv-indiuarLans become- tillers ol
tin' soil. Iu this way the growing dis
position of Americans to forsake agri
culture for urban pursuits Is rendered
less of a uicnace to our national fu
ture. It cannot but be regretted, how
ever, tUat the native American fanner
seems destined to disappear almost fl ,
tiivly, leaving the cultivation of the
soil entirely to Immigrants. Thcv,e 1
no life so Independent and vigorous
as that of the farmer and It is upon
the agricultural class that the prosper
ity of the nation depeuds. When the
farmer Is protijh-roua we all flourish;
when he falls upon evil days we suffer
with him. The condition of the farm
ing jKipulatiun is an Index to the con
dition of the country in general, and
the higher the type of that population
the Iwtter the prospect for national
prosperity. It is not impossibly that
there may some day be a reversal of
the flow of population to the cities. We
are so rich In national domain In this
country that our native-born citizens
have not felt the laud hunger which
Impels the European lmailgrant to
gain possession of a farm as quickly
as lie can manage It. The time will
shortly come when people born in this
country will realize the desirability of
owning a portion of the noil, and when
that realization comes there w-ill be a
reilux from the chics to the country.
In the meantime it Is mion the agricul
tural immigrants that we must rely to
take the places of American farmers
who are deserting their plows for the
attractions of city life. It is evident
that tlte native-born youth of to-day
cannot Ik." counted uikjii to follow the
furrow. Possibly his grandchildren
will be glad to do so.
The Way of the orld.
"When we were p or," remarked the
prosperous man, n flectlvely, "we
looked forward to the time when we
could have a aummei home."
"Weil, when we gut rich enough to
hae one, we didn't like going to the
same place every aummer, because it
was monotonous, and we looked for
ward to the time when we could have
another for variety."
"Well, we got another, and then we
began to long for a winter, place, so
that we wouldn't bare to be so much
Iu the bljr-ncraae In the city."
"Well, we've g t them all now."
"And ore yon happy?"'
"I snppoac no. At least, I suppose
my wife Is. She keeps them all shut
tip, and upends most of her time in
Europe, but she knows abe baa them."
fits Watering Plaoa.
"I've been spending tbe Bummer at
a wanting place."
"Why, Barry told me yvO were on
a farm." '
"Ym, a dairy farm." Princeton
MM lllll A 1 ll
f - GOOD
"That fellow," said Alfrwl Henry
Lewis, the other day. when a certain
well tuoD Tammany man was men
t-oiicJ, "puts up a good bluff, but
there is nothing to him. Open the
trout door and you ate in bis nack
Alexandre Dumas' good-natured
vanity was so uudistluguished that
his famous sou once said of him in
his presiuce: "My father Is ho vain
that he Is capable of standing In liv
iry Itebiiid his own carriage to make
people think he sjiorts a negro foot-
lu a recent uuml-er of Conihlll
Magazine, Mrs. Iticiimond Kitch:
siiys that MUs Horace Smith told her
.'at her a story on which siie declared
ihackctay based the oi-i:ing chapter
f " IVudeanis." It concerned a faai
ly living lu Brighton. so:ue here
-Mr Kemp Tuwu There was a mum'
aiiat sutocrjiic father and a roman.i
young son ho had lost his heart t
.l.e housemaid, and he ilele m.iieii
io marry her. The father made the
young man give his word of bono
that be would not marry eland -siiue
ly. and then, having dismissed him
aug the lll for the buthr. To the
bailer this Major reiidennls said:
'Morgan'' tor whatever his name
wasi. "I viiU you to retire from mj
ei" ice. lull I w ill give y.oj two bun
tired "pound in bank-iioii s if yon wii
marry the housemaid before twelvi
o'clock to-uioirow." Tl.e butler sah..
Certainly, sir," uiid the young mail
uext morning was told of the even
Allien had occurred. Miss Smith adil
.hat a melancholy and sens-itiona
veut immeillately followed: for tin
poor fellow was mi overwhelmed that
he rushed out and distractedly blew
his brains out ou U.e downs behind
the notice, and the butler meanwhile.
living changed his two huudrcl
Kiuiid. suit a message to say thai
Ue had omitted to mention that In
had a wife already, and that thi
would doubtless Invalidate the cere
mony he had just gone through with
the housemaid.
l'Tn,,r;.(" in k.fi.a. Hurt n Unni.ll Kr-
trrience but ' sme Mut AiieaJ.
A refonuid ' tourist" of the guveru-
mejit printing otlice rwcntly t.l.l how
h.t was once cap.urtsl fur a burglar ou
lu Kamas. He and his partner hue
succeedi-d in getting about li ml.it
wtst from Kansas t'ity on the "bliuj
baggage" of an express train, to a
p int where tlielr ro. d irossi-.l a nor h
andrsotith road. There their trait
"Tin n." said be. "everything' alivi
in the lieiL'liborhis'd s.-i-in d to be n.ut
ng. ar.d. armul with pKclifoiks. ho.-s
clubs and all sorts of we.ij o..s, a in !
surrounded us and iliagged u- fr i;
the 1 1 Mform of the car at leas, tin J
got me, but my piutnir kickid one I
them in (be jaw iind broke l'!s hold
ill d jumping on ih.- eg i In movlr.g .r.ii
ttJCitped. They dragged me up into tin
town, calling me a thief and a scoun
d.cl and other things, evtn saying thai
anybody could till by my couuteiiHiici
that I was a burglar."
He tk-tuanded to know the crime t
with which lie was charged.
"oh, we know you," they yelled
"You're the thief that bioke in.c
Baggs grocery More hist l.lght am!
stole five lwxes of s:irdli'.es."
' Five b xes of tntd m m ? I wlsl
1 was! I haven't eaten as much a
that In six n.oaths. Oh. how 1 wl h I
hud as much as one, only one poor littlt
'Who are you, and where do yot
come from'" nskid one.
"Im a printer, I am," said he, "am
I'm hunting work."
"If you're a printer. 'whire l yom
card?' I am an old union printer my
"Here's my card, all right," said he
digging It up.
Sure." said his new-found friin 1
"This fcTiw is all r'ght. This vine
shows that Im left Kanws City tb'i
mouilng; g i bow .uld he have buigl
Bflggs' last n'g'it?"
lie was tmn d Imsp.
"1o'you want to go to wo-k"'" n5t
fd the friend. "What can joti (To?''
: ,"Aii.viijir:g II at fliiyboly e's;.- can di
s raigUt type, ads, job wrrk, la n(
rul.'f, tirive in dutchtueus. kick a press
anything at all."
"All right; 1 11 give you a job $li
a week." hi Id the country editor foi
he It was.
"You're on," ald the printer; "bu
1 want to get fixed up a litle first
bes!d, it's too late to go' to work to
day." '
"Here'a a dollar," said hi new bow
"you'd better' go to the hotel to-night.
Mr. Prin'er went and gd shavit.
iKwt blacked,' brushed up, aiippcr a
the. ItoUi. and everjlhlng that bi
thought was coming to hlui. and
standing out on the sidewalk, j lckl ii
hla teMh. when he heard another Ira'i
whistle for the same crossing. " H.
made a break for If, climbed up to hi
old perch on the "blind liagghgc,' nm
followed amr his "pnrd." a )ltl bcliln
time, but a shave, i ehlne and a sii;
ahead of the game, bcslda the-thnng
out of the doKar.-Wasiilngtoii Post
' irithoot a Dreaa to Match. '
"Tout symptom, madkm, iniKeat
Jaundice." i ' '- " '
- "Jaundice? But, doctor, 1 haven
a suitable drasa far tbAU'WRMeurndi
Lczy men are always boasting c
what they are going to do to-morrov
All Uiot One
Veteran Joshua
fleller of 700 l5ouU
Walnut street, Ur
baua. III., says; "In
the fall of lMi9 af
ter taking iKmn
Kidney I'ills, I to d
the readers of the
paper that they
had relieved me of
kidney trouble, dis
posed of a lame
back with pain
sen"! my loins
and benefltb tbe
shoulder b i a d e a.
During tbe inter
val which bad
lapsed I have had occasion to resort
10 Ioau's Kidney Tills when I noticed
warnings of attack. On each and every
y-casion the results obtained were just
11 satisfactory as when the pills were
first brought to my notice. I just as
mphaticslly endorse the preparation
U-day i I did over two year ago."
Foster Mllburn Co.. Buffalo. N. Y.,
proprietors. For sale by nil druggists,
t'rice .Mi cents rT box
i-l.do I liegrei His Ab'i.'iic.e. ki(ls
"Did jour frleud. Cnesterius Mc
ItUoier, the tragedian, enjoy bis
cads "I can't say as to whether
lie enj ycd It en n t, b-it Ibe public
Jid. "lialtimote Ann Mean.
A Good Father. Smith "Brown
Is certainly doing Ins duty as a par-
Junes "How's that"
.Smith "lie's trying his best to
brlcg up his children tbe way he
i-iould baVi gone " CliicavO Xes.
Wlien a Japniee Itfy tntes a rail
oac) car, she removes lie? tinv aline,
then steps on t tie scit and gradiii liy
r I riv'S don her bodf until she Is
eatci with her feet doubled un ler
Famous Doctor-Chemist Has Discovered
a Secret Compound That Grows
Hair on Any Bald Head.
Olftcoversr of Thi Mgic Compound Thst
Grows Hair In a olngls Night.
He K-iids a trial package of his new and
wroudirfiil remedy fre by aintl In ronvl-'ri
pefllilt- It aetualljr gruws Lnlr, (u bnlr f a II
iiK oul, reuoves aaudrun atxl qi.b-k! re
turn luxuriant xrovtb lo nblului; iuslia,
yeljrows aiid pyeianh.-a and ritre ibt
njilr to II it imturHl r-o.r. Seiid vr nnun
nel nillre to the AI1nhelni Aim Irs I IU
,HiiarT, 1170 K BnliUiug, t'iiH'liiuMl,
lihlo. fer a frv trtsl parage, enel.ng n 2
rent stamp to cover pugtuge. Write iod.iy.
Tn! nicest thin)? abo'it giand optri
o w imeo are tbe tbe clotuis that go
witb it.
Two bnttlea of Pino'i Cnre for t'on
nmption cared me of a terrible roiitb.-
Kre't Hermann, 'Kt Boi aveaje, ISuU'atu
. Y., Sept. 2i, XW1.
As fcr beautv unadorr.fi. what's
.be matter will) the chorus fir.'
Mustang Liniment
cures Cuts, Uurtis, Bruittc.
A woman aan't belp feeling proud
of ti usiant do nets lots oi tele
Largest (revert of
VttitaUi ma It tti
raafS from
cents to
$1.5 0 per
pound, and
no belter
seed Is
lottr.d on
E'W to frtrr
1,20 0 tufitli
wilh Kxh osa striv.
Job A. Salzcr Seed Co.,
Give a w i iD-iii undisputed away
and she will b- sure tn gri an over the
buideii Fbliadelphla llulktln.
"Yes" mused the person who lets
out ao occasional audible thought,
he certainly makes hay while tbe
tun shlnee."
"What bavmaker do you refer to"
asked hla ft tend, who was afflicted
with the rubber habit
"Why the man who marries a
irrass wldow'replled be of tbe clam
orus tbot glils.
Tbe ver p'or ha no friends, nr
even ;eisiiuns. p
Pcm$ Master
Bvwy nook and crMT
" " t this and other eouw-
' MawlUS'SM ! '
toe ;JtT
260. ttfAH. f
JJe traveled for an linpurtant
wholesale house. Feated 0"nifirtabIy
In lb ; railway carriage b- fi'UD"1 be
side blm a rather s date Io king gen
tleman, with t:oni be bought to co
vers, and after the manner f bis
kind, began ty tilling nhat goods be
ld, for lnu be sold, to wbom be
sold, and in what large quantities be
"Ar.d you, my friend," be said,
"what ia your lln ?"
"brains," answered bis aed te and
would-be retiring companion.
"Ab brains, you say? That must
be nice. Yoa carry no samples, eb?"
Dr. Wllliamaou Hwearm.
Torktown, Ark., Jan. 1. Ijint week
a (statement was publisld from Inland
W'llllaniKon. M. I)., of tills place to tbe
effect that Iodd's Kidney Tills are the
bent medicine for all Kidney InseaHes.
and that he uses tueui with uniform
success in his daily practice.
No one who knows Ir. Williamson
will doubt for a moment the complete
truth of bis fearless declaration, but
to completely clinch tbe matter in tbe
minds of those who may not have tbe
pleasure of a personal acquaintance
with this celebrated physician. Ir.
Williamson ban appenred Ix-fore Mr.
II. K. fJreen. J. T. for Montgomery
(Viunty, and made a sworn statement
Iu this sworn statement tbe doctor
has citd a number of cases which
have tieen completely curd t.y Ilodd'S
Kidney PUN. Here Is case No. 1:
Henry Halt. Sr.. aired -is, an Ameri
can, attacked wilh Malaria Haematu
rla or Swamp Fever, temperature rang
ed from 101 to pfc'., highly coated
tongue, constipated bowels, hemor
rhage or passage of blood from Kid
neys, nxed febrifuge and Hodd'a K!d
niy Pill to relieve the Inflammation
an. I congested condition of Kidneys
snd to render the urine bland rind lion
irriniiir.g. lteiovery complete after
two months' treatment of the Pills."
Ligl Ining burned a chimney hi.le
Pi a ha? tick in Mr Allison's farm,
on Wc-t Grand river, near Grant
City, Mo., The rb k was not fjr
Iroin the house, am u couple of boys,
sielng it sim kli g went to it at once.
They found In the top of the rick a
small lio, fro'n which the smoke
was issuing and thrusting a wisp of
ha Into the hole smothered the fire.
When the end of the rick was cut
Off it was found that the llglitjilng
had burned a hole from the top to
the bottom of the stack about two
inches io din meter.
!vfii9 ( fcitPMt Ha . utitn
'iv Iwtl a'Vlii nlUii. iu Hi") mnn'it rwin th
IK.cal iKirimri 01 mo car. 1 n re is nriy oiii
v to ciir pe;i!ut--s. and tiiiit l hy i-ntlii
Irtllill fHicllev IeIIU' s l:lll'd hy ail 111
nilifol efillittUnli nt t!l TTilHVMis llllirii. el Itie
t-'tetUwtilan Tut"1. WI.en Ihlv nil tfet iiiMatiirit
iou Itan a rtmitiliuif mnd or linei-fe.-i iier
ne. an! when it U enieely Hved .eikuiesh
tlio rr:.::il, alii :;esn Oit) Intlainiie-.linu 1 Ait
laken out and lld mt-e rwlmnl l-i IU u jr..al
'ooditli.n. Iirftra.'if .11 ! ilesto.-.o.! leirter:
nliifi ra-M out nt tea lire can hy t alarrh.
aiileli noilnni; Mi. an airaincil curicinioa or
tlie nmcoii mnif e.
we lll pi 1 ifM llMii'ire! In!nr for uny
:k nf lM'.'.li..t l.-lirl It. .-utMrli . thl;l firiri.it
tie eiireii hy li4U'laun!i ui. 'tsenil lorc
rtilarn, ln.
F, .1. I IK INKY fcCO., Toledo, U.
Hold hv IlniiTL-l-t 7 ic.
Uall't I-'amllJ l'li: are Ibe
Let ro'isclence t e your guide at all
times. Use comni"ii sense In every
act of jour life. He couiaireous, up-
r ght and Just. You cant' make
money out, of enemies, so have a care
not to make cn ml- s.
SKAfTV. rOMKOHT. VVHrf. TIOSi Swl taint
out. lsi.rTH'-nl "ir.(r til tl.-llvi-n-d.
IMIll HAH. V , inn- 1 it.
Of tbe entire human race It Is esti
mated that 600 OOti.OtJOlive in bouses,
7iKI t.00.000 In huts and caves and
&rj0,0i0,j00 have virtually no shelter
at all.
Mn. WlnIo' SOOT1IIN0 SYBbt' lor trill
Ion tci'ihiiK,M'K''i the inn. rrducea imia
matlou, iiayiin enret. colic. Piirfi-c botne
Haldne s Is ten times as common
aim ng men as amorm women. It
ias aUo been noted that a roan's balr
turns gray five years sooner than a
KXO hi IS CTAMfi ana Jn -111 ""Ire 0'tl
. i.nr. ir .. or Ih ..rorir.t aad "' .'''r'
ai JoV, bh,H. n,l.. Mi Wimr rranlclla Blu
li.t Wort, t.aleIU. !
If at first you don't succeed, don't
count the h'Sttlme.
makes top of the market butter.
"I suppose Jtuirium went to heaven
whe i he died." "Well, he certainly
bad a etod chance. In fact he had
the greatest show on eirih.
Qnlt Conahlntf.
Why congh, when for ."c and thin n
lice you get 'JXi doses of an nbsolote-
v, giinrnillec'l cmu.'li cure in runlet form.
u crtossii. wis, (c. x. u.)
When a door key hangs up outside
a bouse In Sweden. H is a sign that
the family Is not at borne.
A little girl was tatignt to close
her evening ptavcr during tbe ab
sence of her pipa with: "Fltase
atch over my pi pa." tier papa re
turned and her mamma blushed when
the child added: "And you'd better
keep an eye on mamma too."
The way my brother got oat of jail
was tbis: Hie governor rlslted tbe
pill one day and my brother acci
denMf stepped on hla foot. He laid:
"Ptrd'io. me, governor," and tbe
over nor did.
TH: UTILE U1L08 0110111
By Margaret Widtlemer.
I asked the little tailor as he sewed
upon the hill,
"How can the little busy bet the
poet's words fulfill?
How could that little animal, sup- -
pose he had the powers,
(Or anybody else) improve already
shining hours?"
Says he, "Oho!
You're very slow !
Why, shine them with Sapoltal"
I asked the little tailor as he sat
a-catching flies,
"Why was the man who jumped,
within the briar bush sol
For leaping into brambles, I wewld j
plainly say to ou, i
Is not a thin"; the average man is
very npt to do!"
"Oh, don"t you know
Why he did so?
In that bu,h was Sappho!"
"Oh, little tailor." once said I, "I
wifh ynt'd tell to me,
Why, when I take my walks
abroad, so many poor 1 see ;
And why they're always dirtier
than anyone I've seen,
And even have objections to my
garments being clean?"
Said he, " They go
All dirty so.
Because they've no
Sapoiio !"
I asked the little tailor as he
smoked one uindy night,
"Pray Id! me wliv the little dr.gs
delight to bark and bile,
For, though I own a little dog, I
do not think that he
lias ever barked or bitten at my
iriciiiU or yet at me !"
"Dogs arc a toe
To dirt, and v
P.ite those iio hate
Sapoiio !"
I sat down by the tailor on the hill
and asked him this :
"Why can you always tell me what
the reason for things is?
And why arc- both your wisdom
and your seizors always
So they light our little village on
the very darkest night ?"
"lici'orc you go."
He said, "Just know
'Die answer to all's
Sapoiio !"
I met the little tailor with my Gre
cian Jli-t'ry hook,
Said I, "I wish at Hercules you'd
give a little look,
And tell mc how it was he cleaned
the Augean stables so
By simply turning into them a little
river's flow ?"
"That river's flow,
All writers know.
Contained," 'aid he,
"Sapoiio !"
I watched the little stars that shine
aUjve the world so high,
And I saw them wink and wiggle
all in rows along the sky,
Then said I unto the tailor, as I
watched each little star:
"Now don't you often wonder what
those starlets really are?"
"Wonder? Oh, not
Those stars that glow"
Are pans shined with
I said unto the tailor, "I can't real
ly understand
Why Macbeth's wife made all that
fuss about her stained hand?
They say she used to walk around
the basement stairs at night.
And wail about her fingers till the
house was in a fright I" , ,
He said, "Her woe,
You surely know
Was lack of Hand Sapoiio!"
A bee, unladen, will fly forty mll
an hour; but one com inn homo laden
with honey does not travel faster
than twelve tulles an hour.
Many School Children Are Sickly.
Mother iniy' Kwet I'uwdrri tor (.'hlllrea,
n-J l-y Mmh-r Gray, a nurim In Chlidran'i llonia
.SVw York, Break ni Coldt In tl bcuri. our On
ftinatton. t everWhiieM, Hmdacha, htotnac.t
I'mublM, Ti-nihinu Ptmnlert, in-.ta and riial
lie Ixiwrii u i.d peitroy Wnrmt. Kold fy a
rtru'irl.u or ty tn I. 'Sn. Sample mailed VBKfc
iJivii Aixaa H. OLaarao, U huy, V. V.
In the coldest parts of Siberia a
rainbow may sometimes be seen all
dty long Id a cloudless sky. It la
supp' sen vo oe one to nil rrnociiOD
tt tbe sun on One particles of snow
io the air.
"80 you have bought tbe picture
tbat artist' was showing your
"Yea," answered . , Mrs. Cumroi,
"He's a very clever wan." , "Oh,
don't know that It took ao much
cleverness. Most aoyone can sell my
biiBbands thine nowsdars."
Thotsandahavabaamcwd at
vary larmot pain tad chatty
MhUs. sad &6c