THOUGHT IT WAS A JOKE.
r1 Poa Donated HU Fatawr'e
Uttenl of Peaitiea.
Daring t discussion of the manner
kf the boos of d:stLnguihed American,
the other evening, an Instructor In one
iC flbe private military academic along
tbe Hudson River told this story:
'The faculty of our school were de-
0ntea wnen uovernor urane, o man-
tacfaasetts sent his Ron to us. and we
lU grew very fond of him. for he was
l nngnt ana extremely nioueni juuiu.
In fact his modesty was ho marWed
l bright and extremely tuodent youth.
that we often talked about It among
. .
sursolves. One day there came to Uie
school a party of distinguished visit
tm, and the principal called up a uuin
tm, ana tne principal caiieu up a uuin-
. . I., . i , i
ber of the brighest boys in order to
auction theiu. Among these was
fount; Crane.
" 'Robert, who U the Governor of
Massachusetts?' liniuired be, turning
to the boy suddenly.
The youth thought for a time and
then answered: -I am sure I don't
know.'
" 'You certainly don't mean to tell
me you do not know who the Governor
of your own State is?" replied the a.s
touixlicd man. 'Think a moment
longer.'
'f'I am sorry, sir, but I really don't
know answered the boy.
"''Why, Uobert, your father is the
Governor of Massachusetts exclaim
ed Cie bewildered principal.
" Tes, he told me that himself once,'
answered the boy In the same quiet
tanner, 'but I never believed It. I
tbaagbt he was only stringing me "
Nw York Times.
OlUe Tyme Conrttibyppe.
Du Cupid ahotte atte my swetehcrte'a
herte,
Butte ghee dodged and ye arrowy Mr.
Soe I tooke ayme atte hyr swete redJe
lippes
Aid, in spyte of hyr dodgeyng, Kr.
Ye dere Iytel goule was quyte dysmayd,
Cutte, explaining I was ye Dr.,
( eyyck applyde more two-lyppe salve
And in my armes' craydel Itr.
Shee whyspered that shee'd a syster tee,
And wolden't I bee juste a Bra.?"
"Hette muche, pette!" I sayd; "trie thys
ingtedde."
Heir I jentlie gayve hyr Ano.
"14 trewe luve, canst thou notte bee my
bryde?"
I qqestyoned, and, pressed for ye Abb.
A eotte voyce behynde niyne eare re
plyde: "You're soe pressyng perhappee I
Cans."
Noire, "faynte herte never weone laydie
fayr"
Ne, nor ever cbaynged Miss to Mrs.
And. ye lave a mayde, bee notte afrnyde,
Butte, when arrowes flie wyde, trie
Km.
Harper's Magazine.
Bird-Mad.
Many persons not "to the Manner
bora" are embarking on nature study,
to the weariness of tbeir friends. They
ait in parka and fields with opera
gtaasea, and see birds that aever were
"Cm aea or land." And sometimes their
bored friends rebel.
La a town where untrained ebserra
ttfea rages, says the New York Sun, an
elderly lady met an acquaintance In a
abady avenue, and asked her:
"Do you know anything about birds?"
"Ho," said the other. "I'm sorry, but
I don't"
"Knrrv! Oh. vou're such a relief!
I
' " I
m-k Um n an A aha. trrm onMf mv
hsod. gazed upward, and said, OU did
Tm hear that Derfectlj lovely spike-
nii.mlA.afafl 1 A-fti pH T I
I hadn't gone a block before I met
r bt rinfif t(r1 aha AtMoflIIv
ob that branch Is one of those rare, ex-
quuite, gpecsie-wingea, rug-utueu
creamers
"You and I seem to be the only sane
people. 'Let us rejoice In chorus."
Disinterested Advice.
....
. PLi.nlu Mil Anntrtr tMin thill
atory of a bright boy, bis own, who bad
rexched the mature age of 9 after ao
i tu
early career marked by many wild and
aatachlevous pranks. His resiles na
ture has made him something of a tor
ent to his teacher at times, and one
afternoon not long ago she kept him
after the others were dismissed and
had a aerious talk with him. Perbap
he was a little afraid that her admon
itions were falling on stony ground.
Any way she Anally said:
"I certainly will have to ask yout
father to come and see. me."
'Don't you do It" ald the boy.
The teacher thought she bad mad
an impression.
"Yes," she repeated, "I most send foi
your father."
"You better not" the boy.
"Why not?" inquired the teacher.
"'Cause he charges two dollars a
visit" ald the scamp.
Nirt L'ureaaouabie.
There lives In a Massachusetts town
a mnnif woman whose courtesy nevei
deaerts her, even In the most trying mo-1
ments. Not long ago she stood swaying
back and forth, holding to a strap In a
crowded electric car on a rainy day.
A young man who stood next her had
a dripping umbrella with which be em
ptaalsed bis remarks to a friend. Aa be
poanded it down on the floor of the car
aa expression of anxiety gradually
aoepened on the young woman's face,
1 at laat, when the umbrella baa do
! oulet for a moment ahe spoke.
"I beg your pardou," ahe aald.( In a
(tear, culm tone. "1 am sorry to trouble
jam, Imt could yon kindly chance yonr
I sjala to my other foot for a moment
O ttet I nay empty the water oat of
- CJ rafeoer shoe la which the ambrella
.4 rtaatoao4r
' Cai wb to to fcwi to
' k I 1 we l -Mk ate gat at-bat It
t!" l 2 fl3Pt an It
Mil M IIIIIIMiHI
GOOD
iSbortejtorieS
fitt I I I I I I I I I I I H i I I I HIH
Not long ago a coroner's Jury in Ire
. - - - - -
nd delivered the following verdict o
sudden d of a merchant wh.
bad recently failed In business: -'W
- , , .
Jury find from the new doctor
" , " , " ,
his rleth from hiflrt f:i hire, si ner n
. '
luced by business failure, which wat
eaused by speculation failure, whicb
,
was the result of failure to see fai
. ,
enough nhtad."
A certain learned professor In a Ger
man university has a learned twii
brother, living in the same town, win
resembles h'.m so closely that It la al
most Impossible to tell theiu apart. A
townsman meeting the professor on th
boulevard, stopped him, saying: "Par
don me, but is It to you or your broth
er that I have the honor of speaking?
'Sir," was the reagy reply, you an
speaking to my brutlier."
In hiu "Ueininiscenees." Frederic!
Goodall tells a story of Wellington ai
an art connoisseur. He paid V ilkn
six hundred guineas for bis "Chelset
Pensioners," and lalorious!y eountec
out the amount in cash. When the art
tet suggested that It would be less trou
ble to write a check, the great dukt
retorted that he would not let bis bank
era know "what a d-u fool I hav
been to spend six hundred guineas foi
a picture."
It is related of an Irish coachuiat
that his medical adviser prescribed ani
aial food as tiie best in cans of res-tor
lng health and activity. "Patrick,
said he, "you're run down a bit, that'i
ail. What you need Is animal food.',
Remembering his case a few days af
terwaru, he called upon Pat at Bhe s;a
ble. "Well, Pat." said he. "how an
you getting on with the treatment?'
'Oh. ehure. sir." Pat replied, "01 man
ace all rieht with the grain and oats
but It's mighty hard with the choppet
hay."
Howard Paul says that on one occa
sioa William J. Florence, at the en
of a not very prosperous engageinen
in San Francisco, announced a beueli
for himself and his wife. The latr
John W. Mackay happened to be li
town at the time, and wrote to Flor
eoce for one orchestra seat It wai
duly sent, as a matter of course, nn
Mrs. Florence remarked to her bus
band that considering the friendshij
existing between the two men, shi
thought Mr. Mackay might have takei
a private box at least "Walt" salt
Florence, "he has not paid yet and 1
am In no hurry." The beneflt tool
place, Mr. Mackay came from Vlrginit
City to occupy the seat he had taken
and a day later he sent Florence I
check for $1,000.
Upon his return from Europe, a fort
night ago, Senator Chauncey DepeM
told the New York reporter that tht
rumor that he was suffering from t
severe case of indigestion in Paris wai
Incorrect "I was troubled," be said
"with rheumatism, and I may add tha
I found a permanent cure for It and '.
guess, for the sake of suffering human
lty, I ought to tell you what the cun
la. It Is Just a dally bout with elec
trie batteries. In two weeks' time 1
was welL and now I never feel I
twinge of the trouble that led me t
IVVlUgTJ ui I. civ; k&wuL
. . . i . , l.
It's great If
after i goi weII I found on
fhnf fhp wir of the batteries bad beet
j i. .11 t-Y. lmA r icaa Vi a vl Til
mj fUn with them, but that is oaly i
iti i,.Mt T was fMinwl and tin
method, for a mere oversight like that
Not a Hi-Cent Development.
Talking of the personal journallsn
now In vogue, the author of "An On
looker's Note Book" declares It to n-
nothing new, and quotes this para
HUUJIU . ' " t " '
L. Tt.il.a txf
Welllngtoi
wnicb travesties the prevailing passioi
for mjute details with regard to th
... . . . t.a
nrlvate life of distinguished Individual
at the beginning of the nineteenth ecu
tury: "The duke generally rises a
about 8. Before be gets out of bed, b
commonly pulls off bis nightcap; am
while he Is dressing, be sometime
whistles a tune and occasionally damn
his valet Tne duke uses warm wate
In shaving, and lays on a greater quau
tlty of lather than ordinary men. Whll
ahavlne. be chiefly breathes througi
his nose with a view, as Is conceived
of keeping the suds out of his mouti
The duke drinks tea for breakfast
which he sweetens with white suga
and corrects with cream. He eats tons
and butter, cold ham, beef or eggs; th
eggs are generally those of the com
ruon domestic fowl. At 11 o'clock, I
the weather is Bne, the duke's horse 1
brouzht to the door. The duke's hors
oo these occasions Is always saddle
and bridled. The duke's dally manne
of mounting bis horse is the same tha
It was on the morning of the glorlou
battle of Waterloo."
A Plaaslble Kiplaoatloa.
Tbe bewildering ease with which tin
Irish mind solves political problems i
illustrated bv a etorv from tne e
York Tribune.
The race between two candidate fo
the office of State Senator In Portland
Ore., had been very cloae, and on th
day after election one Irish citizen, wb.
bad been In town but a short time, wa
dueat toning a friend about the result
"How Is it Mike," be said, "that Id
mnny votea It should be neck and nee.
retime tb' two minT"
"WelL I II tell ye, Pat Mid Mlk
They're Iwth vary onpoplUer mla, am
f ye kn wed wan ye'd be tare to ot
tUi th' other end both ay tUm at
aell known, do ye aladr
"I do," replied Pat,
TO WEAR IN EVENING.
FORMAL ATTIRE HAS GAINED
MUCH IN BEAUTY.
IatntCDM Variety of Material and
Trimmings Horn in Btjrlish L'ae la
Responsible New Gown for After
noon Occasions and Receptions.
Sew York correspondence:
AIN ul bt-uuiy ii
as apparent iu the
field of evening
dre as elsewhere,
because of the im
mense variety of
materials and trlui
ni'mKH that ur; in
tylih u-e, and
thHt hence are
available for dret
e likely to have
the most exae'inj
inspection. The
stylish Muffs not
suitable for even
ing are a host, of
course, but. the
number of usable fabrics is remaryably
large. Among tbein are all the :il:ny.
transparent materials, white cloths, deli
cately tinted broeailea in silk, satin and
velvet, and moires. Velvet chiffon is one
new material that, in the light Khndes, is
admirable for evening. It has the ap
pearance of weight that genuine velvet
has, but really is very lilit. White
broadcloth is made princess cut. with
OUTRIGHT NEWNESS IN
very heavy lace for trimming. Crepe de
chines also appesr especially well when
lace trimmed. Llama cloth beautifully
embroidered in very fine white silk braid
makes up splendidly. It is a trifle heav
ier than is the usual evening gown, but
very stylish. Cloth of gold richly em
broidered in chiffon flower ornamentation
fine. Sometimes the gown is white
chiffon and cloth of gold in combination.
gold lace and passementerie being used
for trimming.
Combinations of materials are numer
ous, complexity neing in great lavor.
Pink chitfon with black chiflfon trimming,
the whole over white silk, is a pretty
ELABORATE ATTIUE
one. BlHck and wbits combinations are
as plentiful for this wear as for outtiloor
or reception gowns. Black net, velvet
and velvet ribbon are combined and put
over white silk or satin. The upper part
of the skirt Is velvet the lower net
Landed with linlf-incb black velvet. The
bodice shows like treatment with further
trimming of handsome black silk Cord
ornaments. Net and velvet In light col
ors are a stylish mating, and I see or
el. i (Ton In combination with fur are an
other striking union, both fully indorsed
stylishly.
Four designs of evening dresses ap
pear in to-day's pictures. That of the
small sketch was planned for white tulle
over lemon colored silk, with black bead
ed passementerie and coarse cream lac
s trimmings. Crepe de chine, eMmae
line, chiffon or almost any of tbe soft
DiatertaU weald serve, with aa lasmiaaa
TrWy of psmnntri . Boad paarla
arc put to such uses, too. For tha prin
cess dress, there hardly could b a bet
ter choice than whit broadcloth, cream
Irish crochet and craam ehantilly, tha
but for the sleeve ruffles, though velvet
and llama cloth are indorsed, and even
a moderately heavy cubelin has favor
for luc-h costumes. Next this is a de
sign that could be finely interpreted in
light green crepe de chine and cream and
gold lace, with corsage knot and belt of
burnt orange velvet. Peau de soie and
white lace, or liberty satin ,and batiste
embroidery would be suitable for this
model, and the crrsaue knot could be sat
in or velvet. Pale blue, oeean blue, pink
and bronze are stylish shades for such
knot. For the last gown a tine selec
tion would include pale blue mousseline
over white silk, eoru k lace, and white
chenille ornaments. Practically nil the
stylish '"frrinsptirencii-- will serve in this,
and criH-ln't or nialtee laces may replace
the yak web.
Mui-li that is positively striking pre
vails in receptiou dreses. White, oyster
and a delicate gray predominate, but al
most any liv'lit colored cloth is admissi
ble, ami black may be used. Velvets are
the uioM favored of all materials, and are
in Mark, gray and plum, greens, too,
ranking high, a pretty light green count
ing as of especially drensy value, being
brand new. Variety is supplied in plenty
by stylish dresses of eau de soies, crepe
de cliims. transparent wools and light
wfight silks and satins. Stenciled cloth
and silk are finely combined, too.
Of the three reception models sketched
the first may be considered as of light
gray ladies' cloth embroidered in white
and silver, with white silk vest finished
EVENING- GOWNS.
with black knots, burnt orange belt and1
steel buttons; the second hi oyster llama
cloth, applique of green silk grapes and
leaves, and belt of darker green velvet,
and the third as plum velvet, cream lace,
white moire vest and lavender satin belt.
But a host of adaptations is applicable
to each, and doubtless by many of these
the designer's ideas would not be lessen
ed In their effectiveness.
Fashion Notes,
Darts that are cut out and laced to
gether are altogether new.
The vogue of the bertha has brought
the old-fashioned round, low neck Into
FOlt RECEPTIONS.
favor again as tbe popular shape fur the
neck of a low-cut gown.
fong coats of cloth make possible a
protracted thin gowo season.
White, plentifully Isce-trlmnied, Is fsv
ered above all others for evening wear.
Only the long costs for real occasions
re treated to tbe full deep Isce bolero
finish.
The merost apology for a complexion
finds tbe fashionable mauve a becoming
color.
Dig sleeves are sure to be reduced by
reason of our climatic necessity for oat
sleeves.
An old fad which seems likely to come
Into favor again this season la the aopli
cation of for on Isce, both in tiny hanJs,
which are rery effective, and likewise in
bits and patches outlining er covering tbe
torn of one of the designs in the lace,
ACTRESS DUSE'S
Rignora Eleanors Duse, the great Italian actress, dilTers from many of her asso
ciates in ot least one respect she does not seek publicity. To be sure, her man
agers, especially when she la ou an American tour, use every legitimate effort to
keep her before the public, and D'Anuuiizio's book, which reflected so little credit
upon its author, brought her name into prominence in a somewhat regretful way,
but this was not the fault of tbe actress. She belongs, in a sense, to the public
when she is on the Btage. Her home life is her own. It is not the "homo life
of hotels that Signora Iluse is happy in, but rather in the home life of her ancient
palace, on the Grand Canal hi Venice. Her palace, which is the center buibiiug
of the three builJlngs shown in the picture, is one of those quaint old structures
which hava made Venice an arrhitectoml delight. It is not ss pretention as
some of its neighbors, but, nevertheless, through its great age and its architectural
besuties it is one of the show places of Venice. When it was built no on Be-ims
to know. Certain it is that it goes back a century or more, and that it was
occupied by one of the noble families of Venice Is established. Here, surrounded
bv ail the comforts of a practical age, Sitniora Duse spends the happiest months
of her life. A quiet life it ia, apart from the glare of the footlights and the
tinsel of the stage. She entertains, but on a modest scale. Privileged, indeed,
are the few who have access to her delightful home.
AN IGNOMINIOUS RETREAT.
riie Determined Woman Met Her Match
in Her Dressmaker.
Most persons who attempt to emanci
pate themselves from established cus
om have periods of falling back into
he old way again, battled reformers.
I'he real reformers are those who per
ils!. The New York Tribune tells a
story In which a woman who thought
die bad coiejuei'i-d was, after all, de
feated. She considered herself a. strong
minded woman, and bad determined
bat she would have no more trailing
ikirts. She told her dressmaker of her
lecislon in a tone which seemed to her
lot to admit of question or protest;
ut ahe did not know that tbe dress-
naker, too, was a strong-minded wom-
m, though In a different way.
Ob!" paid tbe dressmaker, in a, tone
if mild prepk-xlty. There was so much
;eblnd that "Oh!" that the woniau felt
moved to assert herself.
I wilt not" she exclaimed, "bring
jome a choice assortment of microbes."
'But you needn't get a long skirt
neiU'd," said the dressmaker. "Jou
hold it up, you know."
It tires urn to hold It up. I want to
tep out freely."
"Oh!" said the dressmaker again. It
was her favorite argument, and It was
apt to make ber opponent wilt without
knowing why. She had worked for
bat particular woman for several
years, and tiad exercised over uer a
mild but Invincible deposltlsm.
"They are all made long," ventured
be dressmaker, "except tbe heavy
stltcbed walking-skirts."
'I don't care!" said the woman. "I
will defy fashion."
This time the dressmaker's "Oh!" Im
plied that to defy fashion was to In
voke death or disgrace. Tbe woman
felt herself w eakeulng before the Inex
orable judgment of the "one who
inows."
'Vou're very tall," said tbe dressmak
er, softly. "And slender," she added.
ifter an effective pause. Her power
lay In tbo fact that she never became
excited and never gave way. A vision
rose before the woman of ber long,
thin, lanky self, clad girlishly In a skirt
;hat escaped tbe ground, with a pair
if very substantial feet peeping In and
jut, like anything rather tbun "little
twice." Hut pride came to her uld.
"Cut It short!" she ordered, sternly.
"I mean," she added, "cut It about half
in Inch above the ground."
"Tbe edge will cut out and collect
Jlit" said the dressmaker, sadly.
"Let It!" said the desperate woman.
"It's a light material, easily held up."
The tone grew more nielnncholy, as If
he dressmaker were fighting with ad
verse fate.
Tbe woman was at bay. "I'll have It
diort!" ahe snapped, and tbe dressmak
ir relapsed Into silence and depression.
A lien tbe skirt was nearly finished she
rled It on with a look of mute despair.
Theclrcularflounce Is only basted on,"
.he dressmaker said, Anally. "It It
an be let down."
"What's all this length of stuff under
be flounco?" aswed the owner of the
kirt.
"Well, I didn't cut It off, you know.
The flounce en be let down. I thought
oil might change your mind."
"It looks very slrnlgbt up and down."
"Yes; If you have It long It will flare
tit butter. You're so tall and aleu-
er,"
"Let It down!" suddenly exclaimed
Ue womea, in tbe tone of a general
bo orders a retreat
"Vary wall" Mid the dressmaker, aa
VENETIAN PALACE.
meekly as If she were assenting to au
act of self-sacrlllce.
A Persian I'aralile.
There was a certain mau who thought
tbe world was growing worse. He was
always barking back to "the good old
times," and was sure that the human
race was degenerating. Men, be said,
were all trying to cheat one another;
the strong were crushing the weak.
One day when he was airing big pessim
istic views, tbe calif said to him:
"I charge you bereufter to look care
fully about you, and whenever you soe
any man do a worthy deed go to blua
and give him praise, or write to hltu
about It. Whenever you meet a man
whom you regard as worthy to have
lived in the 'good old days' tell bim of
your esteem and of the pleasure you
have bud in finding one so exalted, and
I desire that you write out an account
of these good deeds for me that I may
share your Joy In knowing of It."
So the man was dismissed; but before
inauy days he returned and prostrated
himself before the calif. When ordered
to explain his presence, bo walled:
"Have pity on thy servant and re
lease bim from tbe necessity of compli
menting men upon tbeir worthy deeds,
O my muster. And O Son of Moham
med, I pray thee absolve thy servant
from tbe duty of reporting to thee all
tbe good that is going oo In tbe world."
"And why, O slave, dost thou come
to me with this prayer?" tbe calif
asked.
"Since I have been looking for what
Is good." the man replied, "I have bad
no time to do aught but compliment
men for their splendid works. So
much that Is glorious Is all around me
that 1 may not hope to be able to tell
thee half of It. My tasks lie ueglocted
because I have no tline "
"Go back to thy work," said tbe calif.
"I perceive that thou bast learned."
Tom IteeU "Makes" a Keporter.
"Who made you?" "Tom UeetL"
Such would be the reply of , a
clever newspaper man who got himself
established In Washington by a unique
process. Tom Heed, when at the height
of his czarshlp, lived at the Shoreham,
where be held nearly as great court as
In the House. Among newspaper men
existed Intense rivalry In the pursuit
of his favors. Otio morning be was
huffy. It was "Not a word!" to every
reporter or correspondent, and the
group knew he meant It A newcomer,
however, made play for a big stake
and won. While bis fellows waited on
the stoop to sec the speaker enter bis
carriage, this youth nestled under
Tom's big wing, whispering at the
door of the vehicle: "Mr. Speaker, for
Cod's sake let me get In and ride
around the corner with you! I syear I
won't open my mouth. You haven't
got to notice uie at all. If you turn
me down" h became tragic "It
would ruin me forever In tbe iwtlma
tlori of my colleagues and rivals, but
If they see me riding wltb you my fu
ture Is safe," "Oet In." said the enr,
appreciating the situation, and the
gasps of astonishment from the boys
on tbe stoop as the desperate reporter
took bis seat Indicated that a new and
lniKirtant factor In Washington Jour
nalism hid arrived. New York Proae.
Parados leal.
Clara I am thinking seriously of
bleaching my hair. Would youT
Maude-Well, If I did, I'J certainly
try to keep It dark.
A mao'a good latenllona weald be
worth mora If ho eoald gat them
cashed.
