Ttj Uirrlsei Press-Jairsil
c. a niu, nawmtom
. KCBRA9CA
And tone of these days, as likely as
net, the leaning tower of Pitta will top
si over.
It may be necessary for American
glrle to black up before they can get
tote Germany hereafter. ,
The Cubans want to put a heavy
duty on soap. Evidently they don't re-
it as one of the necessities of life.
The case of Justice Oliver Wendell
Holmes Indicates that It Isn't neces
sarily fatal to have had a poet for a
'father.
One ambitious and able-bodied mos
quito will cause more bloodshed than
11 th Central American and Haytlan
warriors put together.
Toung Bartholin of Chicago Is fully
as delightful a character for the con
templation of "our young" as the late
Hr. Tracy of the Pacific slope.
A Western man has discovered a way
to make paper out of oats. In future,
when a man finds himself puffed In the
newspapers he will feel his oats more
than ever.
"A man," according to a Missouri
philosopher, "spends the first forty
j ears of bis life flirting with fortune
and the next twenty looking around
tor the best cure for rheumatism."
It seems too marvelous to be true,
but the life-savers at a station on the
New Jersey coast have reported that
they resuscitated a five-year-old boy
who bad been under water twenty-five
minutes. They worked forty-five mln
jutes before any sign of life appeared,
and maintained artificial respiration
for an hour and a half; then the child
began to breathe naturally. People liv
ing near water ought to remember this,
for Its lesson of persistence may save
'many lives.
A young graduate of the Mill Hill
School, England, etilhited in the Afri
can war, and after long and valiant
service came home seriously wounded.
On "peace night" he was set upon by a
band of London "Hooligans" and bru
tally beaten to death. The boys of
Mm HUl School determined to "avenge"
bis murder, and have planted on the
pot a settlement to be supported and
conduct ed by the school. Compare
therewith a historical picture of the
seventeenth century. It is the dying
Richelieu, towing in a boat behind his
barge tw political enemies to their ex
ecution. Surely the golden age lies be
fore, not behind, us.
' As a record of the progress made by
the nation within the lart two decades
a. bulletin recently issued by the treas
ury department ia certainly a notable
document. It shows graphically the
extant and rapidity of the country's de
velopment In the various branches of
commercial and ' material enterprise.
Within the twenty years, during which
the population has increased 50 per
cent, the aggregate wealth has increas
ed from $42,000,000,000 to $94,000,000.
000, the wealth per capita has increased
from $850 to $1,230 and the total cir
culation of money from $973,000,000 to
$2,055,000,000. The total deposits In
national banks and savings banks have
nearly trebled. The value of farm
properties has increased from $12,000,
000,000 to $20,500,000.010 ad the year
ly fafui prodtKt from 2,2i2.WO,MMj lo
$3,764,000,000. Exports of merchan
dise have Increased more than 50 per
cent. The number of manufacturing
establishments has doubled, while the
value of then- output has increased
two and a naif times and the number
of their employes has more than dou
bled. To-day 194,321 miles of railway
are in operation, as against only 93.202
In 1880. The receipts of the federal
government have Increased from $330,
000,000 to $567,000,000. This Is as im
pressive showing of material growth
tad commercial development
Not long ago there was a Children's
Day celebration at Ocean Grove, N. J.,
and 800 little folks admired souvenirs
In th shape of new pennies set In alu
minum. Rev. J. O. Wilson bad pre-
' pared a sermon and that was a master
piece and the title was "The Best
' Thing la the World Good Heart." As
' a starter and before announcing his
text, be leaned over the pulpit and
aid: "My dear children, I want you
to tell me what Is the best thing In the
, world." He Is to blame for wbat hap
pened. Children are honest Ton can
look Into minds when you ask them
for information. It would have been
pleasing to have boy Harold answer,
"Please, air, to be good to the poor,"
aad to have little Jim announce the
CMdea Koto, aad the rest of the 800
to assert that good Impulses should
the world, and that charity and
i should reign in the breasts
M. atea. The cry that did go op from
Chat amy of children was "Money,
Mo 7, Money P There Is nothing to
' 1 ' ' aretrr abowt It was a foolish question
aad a aataraJ reply. The children of
to day tire la aa atmosphere of money -ptttag.
Tkty tmbtbe it with their
farty aeaetokaseat They Inherit It.
' ' fZZxj as the Straggle going on, aad
flj ara si an lag They are seeking
r to VU money almost before
t t tot tatyheid aai mother's
: r-f .J Tsy stacked a preacher aad
snasnaaasnaMSBS
: t -ihr f - fn ri araisala af
youth one day, with great show f In
dignation, as be learned from the re
sults of the annual examination thai
he bad failed to receive the regular
promotion with bis class. "To show
yon how unfair the school committee
men are," he went on to say to a com
panion, "I will tell you the facts about
that examination. I looked over Nick
Smith's shoulders for everything
Tiere was not a word on my paper
not copied from bis. They passed liiiu
and flunked me. You see how unfair
they are!" This lament is fairly repre
sentative of the state of mind into
which cheating at examination even
tually gets those who yield to it "Crib
bing," as It is usually called, has late
ly been mucb discussed by the news
paper of the country. Nearly every
educator has had some experience with !
the evil, and many of them have luVa
of the way In which It may be pro
vented. Most of the und'-rgrad.iate
deception seems to spring from the de-j
sire to get promotion without earning
it. The students neglect their daily ,
work, and when examination time j
?omes they realize their deficiencies ,
and try to steal their way through that
they may keep on with their class. In
the preparatory schools the students
are usually watched In the examina
tion room; but In many colleges they
are put on their honor, because the
authorities wish to make the students
self-reliant, and to show them that
whether they get an education or not
depends on themselves. Sooner or
later every pupil must come to realize.
In the world If not In school, that the
"eribber," whether he be detected or
not. Is his own worst enemy. Educa
tion Is not the process of getting high
marks. It is character building. The
real promotions of life are not made on
what one reads over another's shoul
ders, nor by wbat a man Is able to
write in advance upon the lower part
of bis cuff.
"Old BUI," who did faithful service
for Farmer Shepler, of Snowden, Pa.,
for 37 years, Is dead at the age of 39.
"Old Bill" was a horse. There wag no
special service when the old horse was
burled, and no sermon, but there Is a
sermon in his life, just the same. Thirty-seven
years of faithfulness! It mat
tered not to "Old Bill" if the weather
was clement or Inclement, It mattered
not if the road was muddy or dusty un
derneath his feet. It was his business
to do his duty by the plow and the
wagon. Upon bis monument should be
written: "He did bis stunt and never
complained." There was precious little
of holiday In "Old Bill's" life. If, by
some exigency, there was a lapsus In
the life of the farm and he got a day
off be took it with equine dignity and
without thanking the gods. If on Sun
day he must needs pull the family to
church or on a visit to the relatives, or
if one of the boys hitched him to the
buggy, it was all the same to him. And
what of bis owner? He must have
taken good care of the horse to make
him last for thirty-nine years. And
there is another sermon. "The merci
ful man Is merciful to his beast."
Doubtless Farmer Shepler found occa
sional fault with Bill, especially in fly
time. He may have used expletives
and other things. But he took good
care of his horse. That much Is plain.
Most likely Bill and his owner grew
old together, and a mutual affection ex
isted between them. They understood
each other perfectly. And (he farmer
was bereaved when the old horse died.
Was there in your boyhood history
some "Old Bill" or "Old Jim?" Some
old horse who knew more about plow
ing corn than you did? You used your
lordship over the beast, and betimes
abused the patient, faithful fellow. But
a lump came Into your throat, and
your uoyiub ejes were wet when he
laid down and died. And in many a
family in town or country Is some old
horse, the memory of whose faithful
ness in all the years is written In the
hearts of man and wife and children.
When God wanted to teach man faith
fulness be made the horse.
Great Heat of Meteors.
Ordinarily the meteors that flash
across the sky at stated periods of
time burn themselves out In the up
per air, but occasionally a meteoric
mass lasts long enough to reach the
earth. One fell on May 15, 1900, at
Felix, Ala. Meteors were seen on the
occasion referred ti and sundry explo
sions were heard, while later on a
mesa of meteoric substance weighing
seven pounds was discovered Imbed
ded In soft soil. This meteorite was
analyzed and found to be built up of
such minerals as olivine, augite, trio
lite, nickel iron and graphite carbon.
The dark color of the Felix stone is
stated to be due to the presence in
fair amount of the last-named sub
stance. The Interest attaching to me
teorites, of course, centers around the
fact that they enable us to obtain
glimpses of the composition of other
worlds than ours. Astronomy Is well
agreed on the nnlty of chemical com
position which marks tbe orbs, and
even the simple fact that it Is hydro
gen gas which blazes In tbe sun and
gives us our light and beat Is a testi
mony to this fact Meteoric Iron and
carbon similarly display links between
these erratic bodies and our own earth.
The Coaaasnpttoa of Needles.
W often wonder what becomes of
all tbe pine, but it It still a more pui
sllng thing to know what becomes of
all the needles; for their use la mucb
more limited than that of pins, and
K ia said that taking the world over,
three mDllona of needle an need every
day, and that bar la the United States
alone tare hmndred ariUioaa of them
an feat aad broken every year.
When a baby shows Ita Int tamper,
tta aether marks that ate Kkas to
at a CM "wKa mkm tit In It"
ocoi
HOUSEWORK AS EXERCISE.
rtJjOME
OME exercise is eaid to be quite
as good as that obtained
porting pursuits.
For arms, fingers and wrists, wash
ing and wiping dishes will be found
admirable. One is as good as the
other. . ..... .
Bed-msklng as it is still taught In
the physical culture economics of the
home, can not be too highly recom
mended. With the folding at every counter
pane, blanket and sheet, the arms are
tretehed as far as they will go, each
hand holding one end. Then, standing
perfectly erect, the chest Is thrown out.
Quickly the hands are brought together
again, and, presto! the sheet is folded
double.
Sholders, body and limbs are all de
veloped by mattress turning. The eye
and the sense of symmetry learn much
from the regular arrangement of coun
terpane and pillows.
Sweeping gives much the same mo
tion as golfing strokes. For the grace
ful perfection of arms and shoulders
so much desired by every ambitious
girl nothing could be better, If done In
moderation.
Floor scrubbing, like lawn tennis, Is
rather violent and must not be tried
unless one's heart Is all right. At
first It will be almost as severe on the
knees as rowing In a shell, but as
one gets use to tbe occupation it will
give a subtle satisfaction of its own.
Running upstairs on errands for the
rest of the family is first-class exercise,
and running downstairs Is almost as
good. Interesting diversion will be
found in egg-beating and Ice cream
freezing.
Dusting ought to have a chapter by
Itself. First you are down on all fours,
then you are on Opto, seeing bow far
the duster will reach. You twist your
self Into all sorts of positions to get
at the corners of tbe carved furniture.
First you are on one knee, then on
the other. Every muscle, every ten
don, Is brought into service before you
have finished.
Even this magnificent exercise can be
overdone, but you will make no mis
take If you only dust every room after
you have swept It although many
housekeepers dust oftener.
Comfort One Another.
Comfort one another;
For tbe way Is growing dreary.
The feet are often weary,
And the heart Is very sad.
There is a heavy burden-bearing,
When It seems that none are car
ing, And we half regret that ever we were
glad.
Comfort one another
With the band-clasp close and
tender,
With the sweetness love can render.
And tbe look of friendly eyes.
Do not wait with grace unspoken;
While life's daily bread Is broken.
Gentle speech is oft like manna from
tbe skies. ,
Comfort one another;
There are words of music ringing
Down the ages, sweet as singing
Of the happy choirs above.
Ransomed saint and mighty angel
f Aft the jrss??, d?6p-TGced evan
gel, Where forever they are praising the
Eternal Ixve.
i
Comfort one another;
By the hope of Him who sought us
In our peril Him who bought us,
Paying with His precious blood;
By the faith that will not alter,
Trusting strength that shall not fal
ter, Leaning on tbe One divinely good.
Comfort one another;
Let the grave gloom lie behind you
While the Spirit's words remind
you
Of tbe borne beyond tbe tomb,
Where no more Is pain or parting,
Fever's flush or tea r-drop starting,
But the Presence of tbe Lord, and for
all His people room.
Margaret E. Sangster.
Old Friends.
Never give up old friends for new
ones. Make new ones if you like, and
when yon have learned that you ran
trust them, love them If you will, but
remember tbe old ones still. Do not
forget that they have been tried and
found true; that they bave been merry
with you In time of pleasure, sorrowed
with you In time of sorrow, and de
fended yon when you were treated with
Injustice. No matter If they have gone
down In the social scale, and you up;
no matter If poverty and misfortune
have come to tbem while prosperity
and plenty have smiled upon you, their
hearts are no doubt as true and ten
der as la tbe days of yore; and Iwcause
life baa brought tbem clouds, all the
more reason that you should share
your sunshine with them.
Cm Good Kna-IUh.
Strange as It may seem, most of tbe
young nun and women of to-day who
aspire to become Influential orators or
writers, even these who are graduates
af high eefceols and colleges, find that,
like Dwlgat L. Moody, the evangelist,
they have net mastered grammar. For
early twenty yean, edicatori. almost
bar seal
with but Indifferent success, to make
various sugar-coated language-lesson
series do the work formerly accom
plished by old-fashioned grammars In
giving students an accurate working
knowledge of their mother tongue. One
natural consequence of these attempts
Is that the number Is comparatively
mucb smaller than it once was of so-
called well-educated young people who
can tell with certainty whether or noti
they speak and write Just what they
wish to express.
Thorough drill in formal grammar
should be made a prominent featur
In every school whose pupils are not
less than 10 years old or more than
2,. But, inasmuch as this subject, as
usually presented, is found to be very
difficult and uninteresting for pupils
under 10 years of age, it may well be
preceded by an elementary course in
language lessons, which will enkindle
interest and prepare the mind for the
solid work in analysis and construction
which should follow. Success.
Brief Buggest ions.
To dust carved furniture there is
nothing better than a painter's brush.
To preserve roses and other flowers
and to prevent their opening out fur
ther In water put a little salt in the
vase you arrange them In.
To make a damp cupboard dry keep
In it a bowl of quicklime. The quick
lime must be renewed from time to
time, as It loses Its power.
To prevent a teapot from dripping
rub a little butter round the spout
This will keep the tea from trickling
down when It Is poured out.
A good wrinkle for mending a bole
In an umbrella is to stick on very firm
ly black court plaster Inside of the
umbrella. This is not so much seen as
a darn.
Mildew stains can be removed by
rubbing plenty of sosp snd powdered
chalk on the garment and placing it In
the sun. It may be necessary to re
peat this operation.
Immediately after opening a can of
meat, fish, soups or vegetables pour its
contents Into a dish. Many cases ol
metallic poisoning reported are due not
to a poison In the canned food but to
putrefactive changes that occurred
after the can was opened.
To make a home-made knife cleaner
cover an old knife-board with a strip
of Brussels carpet Thickly cover the
board with powdered bath brick and
keep an end of it wet. First rub the
knives on the wet bath brick and then
finish off on tbe dry. Knives are pol
ished well and quickly in this man
ner. To clean cream roller curtain blinds
take the curtains down, lay tbem across
a table and then rub them well on
each side with a clean flannel dipped
In cream powdered starch. Including
the lace, If they be trimmed. Next roll
up the curtains and leave tbm till
next day when the starch should bs
rubbed off with a clean piece of flan
nel. To clean a white straw hat mix lem
on juice with powdered sulphur and
apply It to the hat with a small brush
an old tooth-brush will dp nicely
then rinse In clean cold water and wipe
with a dry cloth. This treatment will
not only clean but will also whiten
ruiiburiit straw. Dry in tbe snade and
If it be a sailor hat let It remain on a
table or board, so that the brim may
dry flat.
A pretty klmona for the baby Is ot
pink wash flannel, with bands of In
dia silk and fancy stitching done in
twisted embroidery silk. Tbe kimono
la an easy and comfortable garment
as It can be slipped on and off easily
over a dress or wrapper and affords
the slight protection that Is needed.
The white India bands are joined to
the flannel with brier stitching and
French knots done with twisted em
broidery silk. A row of brier stitch
finishes the lower edge of the yoke,
and above this are worked pyramids
of French knots. Tbe materials nec
essary sre three-quarters of a yard of
French wssb flannel or cballls, a quar
ter of a yard of India silk and four
skeins twisted embroidery silk, pink.
For KoDkscM Caused by Wind or Han,
The following Is an old recipe for an
emollient to be rubbed Into tbe skin; It
will prevent tbe roughness caused by
the fresh sea or hill breezes. To prepare
It use a double saucepan to prevent any
possibility of Its burning. Into a pint
of boiling water stir naif a cupful of
fine oatmeal and let It boll until It looks
clear. Strain it through a cloth and
boll It up again, then strain It once
more. When this Is cool add sufficient
rosewatar to make It pour aaaily and
one ounce of glycerine. It may now be
perfumed as desired aad bottled. It
will need to b waU shakes ay before
HUMOR OF THE WEEK
STORIES TOLD BY FUNI'Z MEN
OF THE PRESS.
Odd, Carious and Laughable Phases
of Hassan Nature Graphically Por
trayed by Eminent Word Artists of
Our Own Day A Bud net af Fnn.
At a little school house In the north
of Scotland the schoolmaster keeps his
boys grinding steadily at their desks,
Itut gives them permission to nibble
from their lunch basket sometimes as
they work.
e day, while the master was In
structing the class In the rule of three,
he noticed that one of bis pupils was
paying more attention to a small tart
than to bis Icsrou.
"Tom Bain," sale, the master, "listen
to the lesson, will ye"
"I'm listening, sir," said the boy.
"Listening, are ye?" exclaimed the
master; "then ye're listening wl' one
ear an' eating pie wl the other"
The Very Limit.
Tom Self-conscious, isn't he?
ltarry-The limit! He hasn't yet be
come aware of the existence of other
people.
Fluently.
"She's not a very good conversation
alist. "No; but her money talks."
Weary's Latent.
' Weary Don't you remember a love
ly, blue-eyed, curly-haired little chump
wot you uster kiss and give pie to
some years ago? Well, I'm him.
Adda to the Interest.
"Do you believe in tbe study of na
ture?" "Why, to nn extent. I like to have a
landscape around every girl I make
love to."
Conversational Hair-8pllttin.
Harriet Don't you think mother Is
a good talker, Harry?
Harry Well, she's a fluent contra
dictor. Ouch!
"Sny!" she cried suddeuly, as the
bashful young man backed Into the
nearest chair, "you must think you're
a bird."
"Beg pardon," he stammered; "I
don't understand what "
"You're on myihat!" she shrieked.
Mumped.
Little Willie Say, papa, this book
says nature never wastes anything.
Pa I guess that's right my son.
Willie Then what's the use of a
cow having two boms when she can't
even play on one?
His Choice.
"Prosperity has ruined many a man."
"No doubt; but if I'm given any
choice In the matter, I'd rather be ruin
ed by prosperity than by adversity.
Tbe process Is more enjoyable."
Like Father, Like Ron.
"George, why are you so unkind to
nurse? Why don't you love her?"
" 'Cause I don't" replied the terrible
child. "I hate her. 1 could pinch bei
cheeks like papa does."
Not Guilty.
Judge I can see dissipation written
on your face.
Remus (frightened) Yo kin, sah?
Well, 'deed Ah didn't write It, 'cause
1 can't spell sech a long word.
Perhaps.
"I went riding with a girl I used to
go with In the days gone by. 1 got
overheated, too."
"Perhaps that was because you were
silling by an 'old flame.' "
Railway Hold-Up.
Conductor Did you give the porter
the checks for your baggage?
Traveler No, but 1 gave blm all the
money I bad and be ought to be satis
fied to let it go at that
An Awful Jolt.
Softlclgb I aw am wcally cawrled
away by me aw thought occasionally,
(lonelier know.
Miss Cutting Indeed! Would you
iiiltid thinking some thoughts now 7
Nolhinic Alarming.
Shurpe "What strange sounds four
wife Is making! I'm afraid she has a
fit."
Whealton "Don't be alarmed. She
Is merely trying to scold ber neighbor
while she has her mouth full of clothes
pins."
And There Are Others.
Kmltb-Dr. L'ppton Is a specialist, la
he not?
Jones Yes. He has two specialties,
Suiltb-What are they?
Jones Consultations and fees.
Way Ahead.
Brlggs Have you made any money
an the races this vear?
Griggs I should say I had. I haven't
been once.
Best Course.
"Husfcand," walled th speckled Dan,
1 laid my eggs high up In tha loft
ad someone took them What should
f donwwr
-Lay Iswr chuckled the rad
as ha strutted away.
Between Friends.
S Mr. Dudlelgh," -aid the beauti
ful girt "1 can never be your wife, beat
I shall always le your friend,"
"Then before I go," rejoined tns
young man, "I liave one last word to
say to you as a friend."
"Wbat Is K?" she asked after the)
ma nner of the curious sex.
"It Is this," he replied. "I think fan
have stacked the cards against your
self In this game. You lose by winning,
while I win by losing."
Terrible to Contemplate.
Stubbie "I see some genius hss In
vented a typewriter that will play a
tune while you work."
Penn "Oreat Scott! I hope It won t
come In general tw"- .Imagine all the
typewriter In a big office building
banging out rag time at once!"
A Safeguard.
"Women are certainly queer crea
tures," remarked the old physician.
"What is It now?" asked the drug
gist.
"Why," answered the old pill dis
penser, "1 just received a postal card
from a woman patient marked 'Per
sonal.' "
Took It Seriously.
Maid "Did yez her hmr that fotnlly
had a sklliton In thor closet?"
Cook "01 bov."
Mald-"Thin, bedad, th' rats miirtt
hov ate it up. Ol can't folnd ut at alf
Another Sufferer.
'And the automobile affected you.
too?" asked the ancient plug.
"Yes," said the ostrich, "I can't get
anything like as many horseshoes to
eat as before."
Very Likely.
Diggs "Gabriel won't le the only
trumpet-sounder at the final round-up."
Biggs "Why do you think he
won't?"
Diggs "Because every self-made
man will Insist on blowing Ws own
horn."
From Hud to Worse.
Mistress-Well, Jane, did you find
the ornament for my hair yet?
Jane Yes, ma'am. But I've mislaid
your hair, and now I can't find that
His Only Chance.
Kind Old Gentleman Why do you
carry that umbrella, little boy? It's
not ruining.
"No, sir."
"And the sun's not shining."
"No, sir."
"Then why do you carry It?"
"Well, when It's raining pa wants it,
and when the sun's shining ma wants
it and It's only this kinder weather I
can get to use It at all." Exchange.
Uuulllicl.
'He furnishes small speculators wltb
tips."
'Why doesn't be speculate for him
self?"
He failed."
Kxtained.
Teacher (hearing reading lessons)
What are pauses, Johnny?
Johnny The things wot grow oa
dogs and cats.
Sure Cure.
Ma "She Imagines herself beautiful.
How can we cure her of such conceit?"
Belle "Induce ber to have a tin
type taken at one of our suburban re
sorts." A I'arados.
Belle What a lovely bulldog.
Nan I think he's horrid looking.
Belle O, but bulldogs aren't lovely
unless they're horrid looking.
The Main Object.
Brlggs Was tbe place you spent
your vacation In satisfactory?
Griggs The best yet I never was
quite so glad to get home.
A Type.
"Bub! Backuumber holds so many
theories which bave been exploded."
'That's right; and tbe explosions
didn't eveu wake him up." Puck.
Strictly Cash.
Mr. Poorpelgh These Pnanma bata,
I siipMwe, are $12 and up.
Hatter (who knows him) No, sin
they ar from f 12 to $100 down.-Chl-
cago Tribune.
Somewhat Different.
Diggs I set a trap for my wife the
other evening.
Biggs Not Jealous, I hope?
DlggsOh, no. Hhe wanted to catch
a mouse In the pantry.
' The Woman of It.
The Parson Always speak well ol
your neighbor.
Mrs. Nexldoor I do; yet I assure you
she Is one of the most detestable crev
tnres on tsrth.
Htlll a Chance.
Wife (daring the quarrel) Before we
were married you called me an angel.
I'll never be In that class again, I sup
pose? '
Husband (calmly) Ob, I don't know.
I still bave hope.
His Turn.
Zeke Do you remember when I re
fused thst tramp a meal be said bis
tarn would come?
Hiram Tep!
Zeke Well, be kept bis word. Bs It
out there tnrnlag tbe grindstone.
