SHORT STORIES. A MUTILATED POET. When a western editor was gifting in feU office one day a man whose brow sras clothed with thunder entered. iFercety seizing a chair, he slammed al umbrella on the floor, and sat down. "Are you the editor?" he asked. "Tea." "Can you read writing?" "Of course." "Read that, then." he said, thrusting at the colonel an envelope, with an In scription upon It "B said the Colonel, trying to ipell It. "That's not a B, It's aa S," said the man. "S; oh, yes; I see! Well, It looks like Salt for dinner,' or 'Souls of sinners,' " 'sold the colonel. "No, sir," replied the man; "nothing of the kind! That's my name Samuel H. Brunner. I knew you couldn't read. called to see about that poem of mine fou printed the other day, on the 'Sur cease of Sorrow ! " "I don't remember It," said the col Mel. "Of course you don't, because it went Into the paper under the Infamous title af 'Smearcase Tomorrow.' " "A blunder of the compositor's, 1 suppose." "Yes, sir; and that's what I want to tee you about. The way In which that poem was mutilated was simply scan dalous. I haven't slept a night since. It posed me to derision. People think that I am an ass. Lot me show you. The first line when I wrote It read in this way: Lying by a weeping willow, under neath a gentle slope. "That is beautiful, poetic, affecting. Now, how did your vile sheet present It to the public? Lying to a weeping widow to Induce her to elope. "Weeping widow, mind you! A wld w! O, thunder and lightning; this Is too much! "But look a-here at the fourth verse. That's worse yet: Cast thy pearls before the swine and lose them in the dirt. He sets it up In this fashion: Cart thy pills before the sunrise and love them if they hurt "Now, Isn't that a cold-blooded out rage on a man's feelings? I'll leave It to you If It Isn't" "It's hard, that's a fact," said the Ooloncl. "And then take the fifth verse. In the arlginal manuscript It said, plain an daylight: Take away the jingling money; It Is only glittering dross. "In its printed form you made me lay: Take away the tingling honey; put some files In for the boss. "By George, I felt like braining you with a fireshovcl! I was never so cut up In my life. There, for Instance, was the sixth verse. I wrote: I am weary of the tosnlng of the ooean as it heaves. "It Is a lovely line, too. But Imagine my horror and the anguish of ray fam ily when I opened your paper and saw the line transformed Into: I am wearing out my trousers till they open at the knees. "That is a little too much. That seems to me like carrying the thing an Inch or two too far. I think I have a constitutional right to murder that compositor; don't you?" "I think you have." "Let me read you one more verse. I wrote: I swell the flying ec.hoea as they room among the hills. And I fet-l my soul awakening to the .ecstasy that thrills. "Now, what do you s'pose your mis erable outcast turned that Into? Why, luto this: I smell the frying shoe aa they coast along the bulls. And I peel my soul mistaken In the erctary that whirls. "I must slay that man, where Is her' "He is out Just now," said the col onel. "Come In tomorrow." "I will." said the poet, "and I will come armed." Ex. BIO DOG KELT THE HEAT. The big dog lay on the pavement In front of the custom house In New Tork. He was a yellowish, brlndly sort of dog, enveloped In a coat of heavy fur that seemed very much out of place with the thermometer at S. So the big dog thought, at any rate, for his face expressed extreme weariness, and from hla open panting mouth great drops of water dripped on the hot flag stones. A symathetlc crowd of mes senger boys and loungers gathered around him and volunteered counsel after the manner of the angels min istering to Elijah. "Hully geet But he's a whale," ald one. "Newfoundland," suggested another. "Naw, he ain't neither," said the shoe trlng man. "St Bunnard, you can al alway tell 'em by the color." "Itallana dog; verra good; sir' chat tered the pushcart man, showing all his white teeth In the delight the sug gestion afforded him. "That dog don't act light, I tell you," aid a seedy looking man. Impressive ly. "Look at them eyes. I shouldn't wonder If he was going mad. He wouldn't be the first one this hot weather, either." The big dog turned his head slight Mr and looked up aa If In appreciation of the speaker's acumen. Several of the crowd drew back. "That'a the Idea," said the seedy looking man. "diva him air. Most likely he's ran all the way from Har lem down here In the flrat stages of byderfoby. What he needs la sir and wmethlng to cool hla blood." "Send for the Ice man," Irreverently suggested a small newsboy, who was quickly suppreMed. "That kid's all right," said the seedy looking man, who was gaining confi dence. "We got to do something. One of you fellows go for a policeman and an other of you get a chunk of Ice some where. Maybe we can save him yet." Two of the messenger boys hurried away with the spirit of noble charity in their pace. The crowd by this time had increased to a small multitude. "Now," said the seedy-looking man, turning to a fakir, "gimme one of them fans and I'll keep down his tem perature till they git back." lit seized the broad palm leaf, and stepping in Tront of the canine suffer er, described an arc through the air which caused the fan to pass within three Inches of the patient's nose. "Ounce!" said the big dog, Indig nantly, starting to his feet. "Ounce! Ounce! Ounce!" he continued loudly. But by that time there were only ' a few whose physical Incapacity left them still within hearing; these only accelerated their speed. The big dog opened his eyes In melancholy wonder and settled himself upon the pavement. Thn a cool-appearing man in a blue suit came out of the custom house, says the New York Sun, and said, "Here, Rex," and the big dog rose and followed him down the street toward Broadway. Five minutes later three policemen rounded the corner ot double quick time, an ambulance dashed op, and the gong of an approaching Are engine was heard up the block. But they found only an overturned pushcart, whose owner was gathering up his wares with soft Italian curses, a man picking up a scattered stock of palm leaf fans, and a crowd of people watching from the second-story windows. HE KNEW THE ROPES. It's the canny old bird that cannot be caught with the bird lime of litiga tion. You've probably heard of Lawyer Hackett Of Somerset A little while ago he purchased some land over which there had been a lawsuit for years, until the parties had spent half a dozen times what the land was worth. Hackett knew all about It Some of the people wondered why he wanted to get hold of property with such an Incu bus of uncertainty on It Others thought that perhaps he wanted some legal knitting work and would pitch In redhot to right that line fence question on his own hook. That's what the owner ot the adjoin ing land thought, says the Baltimore Herald. So he brace dhlmself for trou ble when he saw Hackett coming across the fields one day. Bald Hackett: "Where's your claim here, anyway, as to this fence?" "I Insist," replied the neighbor, "that your fence Is over on my land two feet at one end and one foot at least at the other end." "Well," replied Hackett, "you go ahead Just as quick as you can and set your fence over. At the end where you say that I encroach on you two feet, set the fence onto my land four feet. At the other end puBh It onto my land two feet" "But," persisted the neighbor, "that'e twice what I claim." "I don't care about that," said Hack ett "There's been tight enough over this land. I want you to take enough so you are perfectly satisfied you have got your right, and then we can get along all pleasantly. Go ahead and help yourself." The man paused, abashed. He had been ready to commence the old strug gle, tooth and nail. But this move of the new neighbor stunned him. Yet he wasn't to be outdone in generosity . He looked at Hackett "Squire," said he, "that fence ain't going to be moved an Inch. I don't want the blamed old land. There warn't nothing to the fight but the principle of the thing " A MATRIMONIAL MIX-UP. X few more such matrimonial prob lems as that of which the Richmond, England, Justices have patiently but vainly sought a solution would proba bly render an appointment on the Com mission of the Peace a less coveted hon or than It Is at present Mrs. Gobtton a few wecka ago summoned her hus band for arrears of maintenance under an order, and the defaulting Gibson pleaded that a former husband of his reputed wife one Joe Boxall was still living. At a subsequent hearing Sam ucal Boxall, a brother of Joe, appeared and deposed that be bad met him last spring. At the next hearing, a day or two ago, a man claiming to be Joe Boxall himself entered the witness box and swore that he separated from his wife about twenty years ago, and had near ly ever since been living In France. Confronted with this witness, Mrs. Box all stoutly affirmed that he was not Joe Boxall, but Joe'a brother, Tom, who, she mid. had gone to Australia about the same time that ber own hus band went to Franc. Other witnesses, however, swore pos itively to their recognition of him as the veritable Joseph which they had known eighteen or twenty years ago, and Samuel Boxall, on being further Interrogated, declared that Tm did not go to Australia until several years after Joe disappeared; that he was liv ing eighteen month ago In Western Australia, when he had written to his brother Samuel, and added, by way of putting a final touch to the confusion, that Tom "had a wife of his own now living In Battersea." On the other hand, there are un doubtedly weak points In the alleged Joseph's account of himself, for where as Samuel had described him aa able to write letters, and Mrs. Gibson's marriage certificate purported to bear his signature, he admitted In cross examination that the nohle art of pen manship was not Included among hla accomplishments. There was a con siderable gap, too, in his French rec ord which he at last endeadvored to fill up by stating that he had been "In the ginger beer department" a ministry which Is certainly not known in Paris by that name, though In the present state of effervescence over the "Affaire Dreyfus" It would be no unapt descrip tion of more than one official bureau. In the result the bench declined to make the order applied for by Mrs. Gibson against her second husband; but "they did not otherwise express any opinion on the case." This de cision seems to mean that though they cannot for the moment precisely Indi cate the persons liable for Mrs. Gib son's maintenance, they feel reason ably certain that he will ultimately be discovered somewhere or other among the crowd of Boxalls, No accounts are yet to hand of the condition of the magistrates since the last hearing of the case; but we should think It not Improbable that some of them are suf fering from acute headache. HIDDEN IN PETTICOATS. Quite a sensation was recently caus ed at Jassy, In Roumanla, by the death of a Mme. Balsch, who has, by her ec centricities, for years past, attracted much attention In that town. Some years ago she was the wife of a Herr Veldimann, by whom she had a daughter. After a year or two of mar ried life she divorced him and a mar ried a Herr Balsch, by whom she had a son. Soon after the latter's birth she left her second husband. She then went to Paris, where she called herself Countess von Balsch. Toward her children she never seemed to feel anything but the greatest ha tred, and when her son died she sent the body to his father for burial. She turned her daughter out of her house, and the unfortunate girl was only kept from starvation by the kindness of rel atives. After the death of her second husband she returned to Roumanla, where she lived in complete retire ment. In spite of the fact that she was ex tremely wealthy she lived in the most wretched manner, and was generally reputed to be a miser. A few days ago she died. When her daughter came to examine her belongings no trace of money could be found. In going through her mothef's clothing, how ever, she noticed that one of the petti coats seemed stiff, as If heavily lined. She ripped it Pn and found over 200, 000 notes sewed under the lining. This put her on the track, and all her mother's petltcoats, of which she had on enormous number, were exam ined. In nearly every one large sums of money were found, amounting all together to between 2,000,000 and J.0OO, 000 francs. Fremdenblatt LI HXING CHANG'S MISTAKE Ono day, some years ago, LI Hung chnnir was making a Journey from Tlen-TBin to Shanghai, on the BU'Bjner of the Chinese Mutual company, of which he Is the principal owner, says the Philadelphia Saturday Post. Being of an Inquiring disposition he -asked many questkms about the machinery and the furnishings of the ship. What Interested him most was the barometer, and Captain Baker explained It with great care and described the minutest details. Several months after, when Captain Baker arrived at Tlen-Tsln at the end of a voyage, he was Informed at the steamxhlp office that Earl Li wanted to see him at the Viceroy's yamen. The captain, Judging from the expe rience of other men, expected to re ceive a reward for faithful servloe, and dressing hlmeelf with core took a rickshaw for the residence of the greatest man in China. Upon arrival ho was shown Into the reception room, and pretty soon LI Hung Chang made his appearance, followed by a servant carrying a handsomely mounted ma hogany box. He put it on the table, opened It and took out a beautiful barometer, which had Just arrived from Paris. After Captain Baker ha admired the mechanism of the Instru ment, Earl LI turned to him and sold: "Now, I want you to show me how you f-etell events with this thing." "You cannot foretell events with a barometer," sold Captain Baker, In surprise." "You told me you could," retortod Earl LI. "I never did anything of the kind," exclaimed the astonished seaman. "I told you that by comparing the changes In the temperature and the direction of the wind with the movements of this Instrument we could anticipate a storm, but I did not say anything about fore telling events, because that Is Impossi ble." The viceroy stared at the sailor with astonishment, and exclaimed: "You are an Ignorant Incompetent fellow. Don't you know that the weather la the moat uncertain thing In the world? Other events are governed by laws and arbitrary conditions, from which the weather Is entirely free, and anybody who can and out what the weather la going to be ought to be able to foretell ordinary events." Then with a contemptuous motion he dismissed Captain Baker from his pres ence, and never spoke to him again. "Why does Mlsa Leftover say aha la twenty-four when everybody knows aha Is forty." "Perhapa she Is trying to take advan tage ot the speculative Instinct In men." "How can that beT Hh may think that soma would be willing to take her at twenty-four who would consider her too high at long." Detroit Fret Pre. THE BABY. "She is a little hindering thins," The mother suld; "I do not have an hour of peace, Till she's In bed. "She clings unto my hand or gown. And follows me About the house from room to room Talks constantly. "She Is a bundle full of nerves And wilful ways? She does not sleep full sound at nights Scarce any days. "She does not like to hear the wind. The dark she fears; And plteously the calls to me To wipe her tears. "She Is a little hindering thing," The mother said: "But still she Is my wine of life, My daily bread." The children what a load of care Their coming brings; But, oh! the grief when God doth stoop To give them wings. A FAREWELL PERFORMANCE Jacfl Halllday and Doris Verrall were what the society papers especially the penny ones call "smart people." They lived in a dear little world of their own, whose Inhabitants had nothing what ever to do but eat, drink and be merry; a charming sphere where everybody tried their very hardest to be amusing and amiable, and where nothing was ever taken seriously that Is, In public The greatest enemy of these Utopians was boredom, and this they avoided by being superficial merely sipping at things instead of Imbibing the huge draughts that ordinary mortals are apt to indulge in. When they did a good deed they did it by stealth and threw mud at it afterwards; when they spoke of things humand and divine they hid their true selves and real meaning un der an Impenetrable cloak of flippant slang and cheap witticisms. Each one of them was a hero or heroine of an external comedy with a single part. Thus, the net result of their acquaint anceship was that Doris Verrall had never got a word of sober sense out of Jack Halllday, while Jack Halllday had never heard a syllable of wisdom issue from the delicate lips of Doris Verrall. Doris was an only child and mother less. She and her father had kept house toetgher and mutually spoilt one another these laft fifteen years. They had a miniature Mayfalr palace all to themselves, an Arcadia that would have surprised most of the Utopians among whom Doris tok her pleasures, by reason, of Its restful simplicity and quiet affections. Father and daughter were very fond of each other, each in their own way Mr, Verrall in a digni fied, old world manner that reminded one of Balzac's elderly aristocrats, while Doris showed her affection by be ing disrespectful. She treated "Dad- lUflay," as she playfully styled Mr. Ver- Vrall like a big Bpolled child, and he as clay under her fingers. It was a Sunday evening In June. The sky was clearing fast after a day's rain, and London looked as If it had Just come home from the laundry. Doris and Mr. Verrall, who had gone down to the park for a mild constitu tional, ran up against Jack Halllday, bent on a similar errand, and bore him home to dinner. He had never dined en famllle with the Verralls and won dered what It would be like. The Idea seemed strange at first sight because it was new. London men are above all things creatures of habit, three-quarters of whose lives are carefully plan ned and mapped out for them by that huge machine, society. This Baves them the trouble of thinking, and other dis comforts. So Halllday thought for a moment and came to the conclusion that Doris was a nice girl and would keep him in a god temper half the even ing if he kept her amused the other half. Mr. Verrall he hardly knew. The dinner was a success. All three enjoyed It Jack Halllday most of all. It was different from the shallow glit ter of Us everyday life. It reminded him of "Home Sweet Home" and the domestic Doris, carefully looking after her white-haired old father was an un expected revelation. It seemed strange to think that this pattern of filial of feotlon was the cynical, witty and flip pant Doris Verrall he had hitherto know n For a minute or two the very thought made htm uncomfortably self conscious. He was an Intruder, he hod no place In the domestic economy of that household, no right to pry Into their attachment and intimacy. This feeling gave way after the first few moments. No one, save himself, noticed the Incongruity of his presence; he was evidently a welcome guest and belong ed to the picture. Doris had never seen him so quiet before. To him she seemed a new being, more like one of the peo ple In the books he read In his lonely chambers than the Miss Verrall of yesterday. When she talked to the old man the theater with the solitary actor seemed to have closed Its doors; but whenever she addressed a remark to Jack the portals reopened, the foot llghU glared brightly as ever. Perhaps It waa his fault Habit was stronger than natur. He could not speak as he felt, and ahe took the cue. In spite of themselvea they could not shake off the heartless Jargon that veiled their true aelvea In a most of precocious cocksureness, cynical affectation and superficial worldllnese. The old gentleman listened amusedly. He rather enjoyed their curious meth od of evading sense and sincerity. There waa a certain misapplied clever ness In It all that was new to him and seemed full nf the pretty vanity and overflowing vitality of youth simply a mood, a mood that had Its fnultN, no doubt, but waa Interesting all th same. He did not know that Jack and Doris spent the greater part of tnelr lives an. Id similar drivel, and that both. In that Instant, were tired to death of It loathed. To them it sounded out of place, bad taste, even vulgar. Yet it was their language; they could not shake it off; they could not talk to each other but in that profane tongue. Each could see the reflection of their thoughts in the other's eyes, but neith er was strong enough or bold enough to be real, to rebel. They grew silent after a time while Mr. Verrall talked lovingly about books and pictures and men and wo men who had written and painted them. The old gentleman had a simple, home ly way about him that was restful. Doris and Jack listened contentedly, and again Halllday thought of the peo ple In the books, while the girl looked encouragingly at her father even tenderly, Jack thought She stayed In the dining room while the men smoked a cigar, and then Mr. Verrall, with many apologies, settled In a big arm chair for his usual after-dinner nap. It was nearly dusk, and Jack asked her to play for him In the twilight, so they went up stairs to the drawing room. Doris seated herself at a piano while he went over to the fireplace and sank deep Into a big chair piled with cushions. Doris played divinely and the music went deep Into his soul. It wove subtle spells as It filtered through the shadowy room and made him sink deeper into the chair and guard the silence of death lest he should lose a single note of the harmony that spoke to him out of the dimness, out of the fleecy haze that wrapt all things. A whole world of spirits whispered in his ears; they told him of Jack Halllday much about Jack Halllday. The little devils that pop in and out of everj man's post were murmuring fitfully around him, exercised maybe by the dim light, maybe by the music and shadowy figure at the piano, maybe by all three together. It was too dark for Doris to se his face, so he left hlB feelings have full play. Every note raked up some long forgotten dust heap In his heart, recalled thought after thought of past homes, ambitions and love chiefly love. Shadowy faces of nameless men and women, faces long forgotten and all too well remem bered, that had left their mark on boy hood, youth or manhood, rose from out the gloom. Now the notes wove them selves Into words soft words that had made his heart beat madly In other days, or humbled him through their wealth of spotless purity. It was quite dark now, save for the moonlight, but he sat still in the chair listening to the voices that surged In his ears. He had shut his eyes and pressed both hands to them so that he Bhould be still blind ed to the present blind to all save the sweet pain of the hour, the sadness and longing for better things that filled his naked soul. Suddenly the music ceased. Doris closed the piano with a bang and, turn ing a tap In the wall above her head, filled the room with & great blaze of light Halllday sprang hastily from his chair, then, regaining some of his old composure, "By Jove, you might give a fellow some warning!" he said. She smiled, divining the cause of his nervous face and the softness In his eyes with a woman's ready intuition. Then they both rubbed their eyes be cause of the sudden glare of the elec tric light, till she laughingly said' "Caught you napping, Mr. Halllday! I really didn't know that you ever took anything seriously," and a picture of the Invariably flippant and supercilious Jack Halllday rose up before her. She salw a half reproachful, half pained look in his eyes, so she added, "1 must't be personal or you'll hate me;" then, taking a chair to the other side of the fireplace, she went on tentative ly, "Let's talk sober sense for an houi or two and keep up the Illusion." "Intoxicated nonsense is nicer, isn't it?" he onsw:i-ed weakly. "Mr. Halllday, do you want me to frown?" "No, but" the smile that was on his face died away as the pain In his eyes deepened. "Do you know what you ore risking? Are you in earnest? Shall we really take each other seriously for a change?" He pauBed here, wonder ing whether single men and women ever did take each other seriously in his world, at least. In the other world, where people had to work for a living, it was different They had to be seri ous or go under. Then he looked at her for an answer, marveling at the kindness and good will In her face. "Why not?" she said slowly. "Does n't the smal Italk sometimes bore you more than the big words? Weren't you serious when I turned the light on? Tell me what you were thinking about, if I'm not too curious." , Doris was silent now. She was wait ing for him to speak. Her heart was too full for words, filled by that strange new sensatnm that made her wish to help him, to comfort him and give happiness even at the risk of her life, a feeling unselfish, self-sacrifice, and purely womanly that Increawd with every word that he uttered. Jack began nervously, galnln gforce as he went along. "The music rather stirred me up and set me thinking of the nothing, the empty nothing that represents my past a thing I thought was gone and done with quite gone. It's different with you," he went on, "You've got some one at home you can talk sense to. I haven't. I sit alone In my rooms sometimes and think of another life than the feeble Imitation of a one I lead sometimes real, some thing like the people who say, Time is money1 lead. We say, 'Time Is made to he killed.' I suppose It's because we've got the money. It's not the work I want, but It's something different to the aimless vanity of our life." 8he looked at him kindly, it seemed to him. He thanked her with hla eyet and continued: "This may be en ti me nt, even sickly sentiment but yos know that when a man begin that way he Is ten times worse than a woman. It's a long time since I saw anything real anything lasting. Perhaps If I bad I would not have believed in it, would have pooh-poohed it. May I be person al? I envied your father tonight and I envied you. I always thought your life as empty and aa hollow as mine, or else I should never have complained. It was all new to me; it ought not to have been only one forgets every thing In time. I suppose the real world Is full of men and women who live for men and women, but I've been playing my part alone all these years without help and without helping." He spoke disjolntedly, with a voice changing from husky to broken and back again, rolling out every word painfully, sad ly, as though he were alone In the room and speaking to himself. He kept hi eyes away from Doris, save every now and again when he looked at her wist fully, pleadingly. When he caught hei eye he say pity in It and even fancied there was love as well. Her face waa that of a woman a real woman, ten der and sympathetic. He continued his monologue. "Then the twilight and the music, and may I say you, too, got hold of me and set me thinking of my people that are gone and the sister miles away In India, and a thousand other selfish thoughts ot self-pity. But It's not too late to Join the other people, to get out of the nar row world, the pack-of-cards thing I've built that's now toppling over." He stopped and looked at her Inquiringly for words. He knew she would com fort him, could comfort him, that he could find peace, even happiness, with her. It was all part of the new sensa tion that had made him pour his heart out to her and look to her for help to face Iris new life. She spoke to him. It was difficult for her to restrain her voice lest It should be too tender, but there was an occasional tear In it In spite of her self-command; and he lov ed her the betetr for it She even thanked him for the confidence he had shown her; and then she spoke to him of his family and himseclf and other things they had only dared to vaguely hint at in the past They sat long together, talking a old friends dofl openly, intimately, with out restraint There was a new sense of rest in both their hearts now; a vague thing that people recognize and call happiness when It I haa become a memory. The house was very quiet; there waa a stillness over all things that was al most new to them. They had avoided It in the other days. The play with the one part was over now, and the theater razed to the ground. Mr. Verrall come In later on and Joined them, till Jock reluctantly said good-night Doris saw him as far aa the hall. They shook hands, he pressing her five little fingers to his Hps and thanking her earnestly, saying he had never spent a happier evening and asking if he might come again and talk to her. She sold: "Of course." The door olosed on Halllday, on all the vain trumpery of his past and he went home planning a new world built on the ruins of the old. Tet the old was not utterly worthless, for it bad, given him Doris Verrall. ... . Owl Courtships. Very funny, It Is, from the human point of view, to witness the love-making of a couple of owls on a moonlight night, as they sit together on the cop ing of an old wall, or on the horizontal limb of some giant of the forest. Perch ed on the same bough, or the same wall of ruin, the lady owl, though usually much bigger and stronger than her mate looke the picture of demure coy ness, If a little excited inwardly, like a girl at her first ball. But the male owl, says the Pall Mall Magazine, Is very much In earnest; for a moment or two ne remains quite til, theh he puffs out all his fethers. bows, and utters a softened scream. followed by a modified hiss that Is full of tender meaning, and then he nudges her with his wing; she opens her big eyes vary wide, ana gives nim a side long glance that may be a hint, for, horrible to relate, from the depths of his Interior he instantly brings up a half-digested mouse; and, although she Is full of similar rodents, and stag beetle as she can comfortably hold, she opens her mouth and accepts the fragrant gift with a murmur of satls fectlon that speaks volumes of love and thanks. Then, when the dainty morsel haa been disposed of, they ca ress each other tenderly for a moment or two, and then sit closely pressed to each other's side while the process of assimilation Is perfected, after which they simultaneously flit away Into the moonlight on noiseless wing In search of further prey. Not only do the owls guard each other with a devotion that Is rarely met with among more favored creatures, they positively idolize their lll-favoredl offspring, for whose sake they willing ly risk not only liberty, but life. A young owl Is not an attractive looking object from our point of view, but In Its father's and mother's eyes It Is per fection, and the way they wait on It, cuddle and caress It, feed It and keep It clean, must be seen to be believed. OETTING EVEN. "Oh, yes," said the stocky man with the square Jaw, "my married Ufa la quite a happy one." "Glad to hear It," said the thin man with the thin hair. "Got any particu lar system V "Well, yes. Whenever my wife get Into a tantrum I go out and find the fellow who Introduced us and glv ! another licking." i