Image provided by: University of Nebraska-Lincoln Libraries, Lincoln, NE
About Harrison press-journal. (Harrison, Nebraska) 1899-1905 | View Entire Issue (Aug. 10, 1899)
TMB NATTV BICVCLB OlHL.
Before she got her bicycle she some
times used to make
Tbe beds ud wuh the dishes, and help
ner mother bake.
Bbe would even sweep tbe parlor and
duat the bric-a-brac.
And onee ahe did the washing, though
It almost broke her back.
But now ahe'a rot her bicycle ahe
doesn't do a- thine
bout the house, but day and
ahe'a alwaya on the wine.
Bhe'a done a dosen centuries and more,
I've heard It laid.
While her mother does the washing.
eweepa and dusts, and makes the
ha looks extremely natty in her brief
he often talks with strangers, and ahe
has been known to flirt.
health was never better: brown
and roey la her skin.
her mother. If you'll notice, la
looking worn and thin.
FOLLY OF WOMAN.
"Bo It la; btit Hoiroyd has - nsrr-1
fur me to play round the Marptetoa
links with ay lor on Tuesday msialng
ana ne usoubl I bad better have a
walk over the course first So Monday
"I see. Bow would tt be If I Joined
you at tbe Holroyds' oo Tuesday, then?
Of course, I must be there for Wednes
day's ceremony "
"But you'd like to go round wtth the
match, wouldn't you? and there's no
mornig train that would get you there
in time. We start at 11.
Mrs. Allonby suppressed an Inclina
tion to laugh possibly one to sigh,
"Oh, In that case It had better be
Monday for both of us!"
"Very well, ril send Charles to the
postofflce wtth a wire at once. And,
Eve" pausing In the doorway "could
you get up a Mule Impromptu dinner on
Saturday, do you thing? Just eight
people or so to meet Msillnger? 1
know he 4 like to come,
"The thing la difficult; but It shall
be done,' quoted Mr. Allonby, nod
ding her husband out of the room.
It proved difficult In another eense
than (hat In which Eve had spoken or
Walter understood the word. Mrs. Al
lonby did not know, till ahe took her
pen In band, how absurdly weak that
light attack of Influenza had left
"The demon Is playing havoc with
my nerves after hta accustomed fash-
necaasarllr taps her sot of lsnpraSeacs,
an recalled tht pride wit, which Wal
tar had quoted the Russia dlnlaiat
lat'a flattering epithet, and congratu
lated herself that ahe had "mads aa
When Prince Karakoff mat bar again.
Av months later, he was less lavish of
"That the lovely Mrs. Allonby of last
winter?" he queried, shaking his bald
head mournfully. "You surprise ass.
On my honor, I should not have known
tbe lady again."
It seems that, given a heart and lungs
which had been touched by ths lav
fiuenga-flead. a regtmen of party-giving
and party-going, of golf playing over
windswept links and eiooe-iayiags in
driving sleet may work aa sorrowful
havoc with the patlent'a good looks aa
that aofa-and-brouffcara course so un-
compromlsJngiy condemned by Walter
Waiter Allonby's wife recognised this
truth, yet she continued the regimen.
She continued It, because ahe durst not.
for her life, flag In that arduous busi
ness of keeping step, lest her husband
should remember that she waa six
years older than her.
Remembering that miserable fact al
ways herself, having It continually be
fore her mind, she watched her beauty
fade with daily-increasing terror ter-
or gave It any tore definite name'
tided her safely over those terrible
wana pieces T one insisted on return
ing to mingle at once with the crowd;
and when Betty, an hour later, ven
tured a low-voiced remonstrance,
grounded on her friend's air of sup
pressed suffering, she waa repulsed
"My dear. It's not civil to toll people
they are too ugly to be abroad. If I
had a cough which disturbed the com
pany a peace of mind, I would retire at
once." ("Thank heaven! my ailments
have never taken such tangible form:"
she thought to herself.) "But in this
fro country I presume a woman may
be permitted to look as 111 aa ahe likes.
When Major Everard atepped out of
his hansom at Lady Holmwood'a door
the following evening, be felt certain
miserably certain of finding Eve
among her guests. There had been
strong and aerloua purpoae underlying
his cousin a light speech. Something-
very far removed from reckless love of
pleasure was driving her remorseless
ly upon this suicidal course which he,
and every other human being save one.
stood powerless to arrest.
waste are anneralr)
wiut in i arm atone, rrult tarn
ft twees of ths Juicy nature rendei
tsw or a spoon and fork necessary
bait whenever a spoon can be dispensed
who, n is Deitar to use tne rork alone
-Tsss is eaten at dinner part In
by young ladles, who generally avoid
nil very highly flavored and stron
rowiing aunesv wnen Us time rm
the dessert arrives, says Home Notes
a plate with a doyley and a flngei
glass Is placed before each person. wh
removes the glass and doyley aiil
places them on the left-hand aide ol
the dessert plate to make room foi
tbe fruit soon to be placed upon It.
When eating grapes, cherries ant
other small fruit the half-closed han
should be put to the mouth and atones
pits and akina ahould be carried by l
to the plate. They must not be droooed
airect from the Hps to the plate, foi
that would look very ugly.
Strawberries and raspberries, whei
not eaten wtth cream, are taken up bj
stalks: when eaten with crenni
both spoon and fork ahould be used.
was sounding as he ' Peer, spples, peaches, nectarines
crossed the hall: but Just aa he reach
ed the foot of the staircase7 It ceased,
sharp, suddenly. In the middle of a bar.
At bis Brat eight of the ballroom on
the upper floor ahowed him no array of
ror of the fatal moment when Walter,
In whoe eyee she could already dis-. ordered couples, but a veritable mob of
cent puzzled disapproval of ber changed I black-ooated men, and bare-necked, be-
"Beriously, Eve. you don't think of
Sninsr to the ArH-Tji n riatn"- tnmrtr.
row night?" I 'on- 1 uppose." h thought on finding i appearance, should read In the eyea of Jeweled women pressed toward a door
"Quite seriously, my dear Betty, I nerB;lf rea1' to weep because she had : others that hla wife waa become a j way at the other end, with subdued ex
do." Mrs. Allonby smiled slanguldly i dtrec,e1 ,wo envelopes upside down, plain, sickly, passe woman. Hia post- clamatlons of :
from anions; her sofa cushions and I ut n snan t have the better of me; t Ion, as an embryo politician without i "She's deed?" "No, no It a only a
drew the fur rug thrown over her
' closer, with an Involuntary shiver.
"But ut ought you to go?" Betty
Holm wood murmured diffidently. She
was only 20; Eve Allonby represented
to her girlish enthusiasm the sum of
ail feminine perpefctlon; in Impugning
. her Idora wisdom she felt herself pertl-
sosty near committing sacrilege. "Re
member, on Monday you could scarcely
nrt your head rrom your pillow."
"And today Is Thursday, and I am
virtually quite welL I can't consent to
be made an Invalid of any longer, what
ever you and Dr. Carmlchael may say."
"I shouldn't have Imagined," Betty
aid ruefully, "that you would have
eared so very much"
"About one of Eleanor Orde-Laurla-ton's
crushes? Oh, if that only were
In ejuestlon, I'd willingly stay at home!
But there la Walter. I hate disap
pointing him; besides, be really ought
to put In an appearance at this party.
Ail the political people will be there."
"Can't he go without you?"
"Tou know be never cares to go any
lian without me" reproachfully.
"I know. Still, I should think "
Betty checked herself suddenly.
"Ah, you think many things!" Mrs.
Allonby half laughed, half sighed.
Wait ail you've been married five
years, nry child. Then you'll under
stand that your husband's fancy for
having yen always with him is not one
to be trifled with. Also, that if a wo
man wishes to keep a man's comrade
join, to be hla friend of friends, she
Brust prepare to wage war with femi
nine laatnesa. No man will put up with
a comrade who 'fails out' whenever ahe
the least little bit footsore."
Ifa the man business to call a halt
aa soon as she feels tired,"- Betty de-Mured.
1 1 won't give way
And she did not give way. She ap
peared In Mrs. Orde-Laurlston's crowd
ed rooms the following evening as bril.
Uant and gay as resolution and one of
Rose Poulllet's most successful crea
tine could make her; thus arousing
the virtuous Indignation of Mrs. Cat
terell. her husband's aunt.
"The way young women nowadays
and especially young married women
spend their lives (and risk them) In the
headlong chase after amusement Is
positively shocking, to my mind," this
excellent person declared to old Lady
Holmwood. "Look at my nephew's
great wealth or great connections, was fainting At!" "Heart, I suppose; she
not such as to compel social consldera- looked appalling 111 at Preston House
Uon for her.
Such modest success as she had won
In the great world was due (she knew
It) to her own fair face and bright wit.
Now both these weapons of attraction
had failed her at once (it was so diffi
cult to be amusing when all one'a ener
gies are absorbed tn doing battle with
physical weakness!), and society, care
lessly cruel, waa beginning to show its
consciousness of her losssa
When, at a certain great bell, three
successive blank spaces confronted her
on the program, she knew that the
She nodded fiercely toward the hnu. . Annm -B to Btrike
corner where Eve smiling over the , . . " .
posy of hothouse flowers, ttth which I ,?e,p?I?,te' tuni!d .-TJ 5
Walter had presented her. "on her re-jnlfloant ""S10 'h J-el
turn to the stage." was holding three ' man siding near de-
men In talk at once. "At the beginning ! mSdln ln.r moBt 'nnlnB..m.a.-
of the week she waji In bed with at "ow 11 "" rou - v
doctor looking grave about the state
prevent hla guessing that she doea feel
Ured," Eve retorted. "I often marvel
at folly of wives whom I overhear
Wing their husbands to death with the
tale of their petty ailments. In my own
pjs but perhaps yon may say that
tine is an exceptional case" flushing
it-furry '"It la undoubtedly. When
the balance of age lies so much on the
"My dear Eve," the girt protested
nastily, "surely you needn't take that
point Into consideration! To begin with,
you look year younger than Mr. Al
ien by. Everyone says so."
Betty's exuberance of feeling occa
gl anally found vent In a corresponding
recklessness of speech. But in her pres
ent desire to console, she was not guilty
it rhetorical exaggeration. No unpre
jjqdUoed observer, setting Eve Allonby
ftfll, at four and thirty, combining the
slender grace and delicate coloring of
gtriheod with that higher and deeper
Bsnoty found only In the face of the
ITsxnan who has thought and loved and !
esnuwed buside the man who entered
Bar morning room aa Miss Holmwood
left ft, much less his elder by a round
fc'i-doMn rears. ( e- -iwsiteT
Allonby waa one of those
Bsnvtly-ljandsome men who cease to
past jSpUBB .before they have well put
eft the echoolboy'e Jacket At 28 be
ksaiffht easily have passed for 35 and
vfassdlBgly comely 36, be It under
.SxOOd. Tall, broad-shouldered, straight
.-of Usnb-and hard of muscle, with a
fsal complexion and x?cld, ox-like
gym Bve'e husband might have sat ap
.fr)rkUly for a picture of the true
psra Englishman of a certain type and
elans the class which dreaaea fault
1 sea It and fares sumptuously every
"day; the type which, happily concioue
Of btsanelessness in all works of law,
sontesaplates life habitually through
the smoked glasses of a perfect self
gatiaf action, thereby blurring its per
etpttoa sf many facts that, more vivid
ly apprehended, might ruffle It serenity
gad Impair Its appetite.
IBr. Allonby, on leaving Oxford, had
been called to the bar; but he had
never attempted to practice. Having a
sajfllctent private Income, he could af
ard to indulge at once hla dislike of
dndBery and hla ambitions which lay
ts the direction of a political career. A
esiiealaliig speaker and a good man of
toejsieas be took pains to make him
self useful In both capacities to his
arty. And "the party" had lately ac
bwwledgwd his services) by recom
sjaaslnsT hla to aa East Angtan con
ssttnesver which had no candidate of
Jet right color in reserve against the
fortoosaing general election.
ct Just now between nursing this con
.tHuesey, extending hla social connec-
tlene he held that, to the furtherance
Sf his larger enda. It was highly lm?
nilanl that he should "get on In so
Set7 " and Indulging In those healthful
snorts which, as he was fond of telling
Bis rural audiences, "have made Eng.
snu tney sure
tittle time to spare. It was untor-
that Eve a mooei wm, wu
-atwWIrd him with unnagmng semi i -
hto schemesshould happen to be tald
MM at such n Juncture. Besides, her
sxwfnbttss apart, he Missed her hourly
eomnaniocuihlp. Mo one else under
stood him so perfectly, sympathised so
eMODletely with hla alms, or watched
ersta i so keenly attentive an eye the ef
last of his speeches or his boundary
drives on a critical crowd.
"Better? Really? Quite yourself
be Inquired anxiously, coming
VM ber sofa. "That's right! Then
mm won't be afraid to attempt ths
Wot S bit," ) responded, sitting
aw bravely. 8 be had thrown off her
Ia 2nd raised herself from her re
umiilur position as soon aa she beard
kse bnetMUld'a step.
"Asrfloaa let Holroyd know that be
new expect ns on Monday r
-ITCwt I thought the atone-Uy-.--riisoIeW'-Marpleton
i r tswnoTtbe county division for
of her lunge. And there she stands
with the thermometer twelve degrees
below aero temptinr Providence In a
A very pretty gown," Betty's grand
mother commented approvingly, turn
ing her head and ber long-handled
glasses In Mrs. Allonbys direction:
"and particularly becoming to Eve.
Except that she is a trifle pale, I have
never seen her In more charming
Could Mm Allonby have overheard
thla flattering expression of opinion her
mind much tormented by doubt on the
subject of her personal appearance
might have found rest As It was, her
secret anxiety betrayed Itself In a hasty
appeal te Betty:
"What do you think of me?"
"The frock's a dream!" Betty re
sponded with heartfelt enthusiasm.
"Oh the frock is well enough, I
know" impatiently. "But I I my
self? Do I look like the death's head
at the feast of reason?" glancing with
a faint curl of the Up along the range
of overthrow red rooms In which a num
ber ef suffering men and women were
engaged in practically demonstrating
the compressible quality of the human
body, and trying to look as If they
found the process agreeable. "Am I
fit to appear among my fellows?"
The words were light But the apeak
era eyes hung on Betty's for an an
Betty waa highly reassuring. "Tou
are exquisite. Just like a spray of white
lilac or stephanotls. But oh. Eve,
wish you were at home, away from the
heat In here and the draughts outside.
Protnlae me, at least, not to atay late."
Mrs. Allonby touched the girl's arm
carelessly with her fan.
"Tou foolish. Under-hearted child!"
(There had been a suspicion of tears In
Betty's pleading voice.) "I promise-
on the faith and honor of a gentlewo-
wan. as soon aa Walter ht done with
Sir John Mallinger a mere candidate
must needs be patient wtth an ex-minister,
let him be every so prosy we will
depart I daresay they win have had
their talk out In another Ave minutes."
Mrs. Allonby underrated! the charms
of political conversation. Sir John
MaiTlnger's further comments on the
position of national affairs and the
prospects of Mr. Allonby's rettrrn for
the Marpleton division of Loamshire
occupied fully a quarter of am hour;
and hkf retirement only left Walter
free. to cultivate the good graces of
other distinguished persona who hap
pened to be present Not till ft was
growing very late indeed did he find
himself at leisure to propose taking his
By that time Eve was frankly tired
out. She had some difficulty In not
falling asleep as soon as she found her
self In the carriage. But Walter, waa
In a talkative mood. So once more will
triumphed over weakness.
"I suppose you saw Arthur Chalons
erT" he remarked, when the sayings
and civilities of Sir John Mallinger and
his colleagues had been sufficiently dis
cussed. "Across the room only. I thought be
looked oat of spirits. Was Mrs. Chalon
"No. She's laid up with one of her
many maladies so I understood from
Chaloner. Poor beggar! I'm awfully
aorry for him; that woman a perfect
millstone bauot hia neck. He can't
even ask a friend to dine, because she's
'not equal to seeing people!" Of course,
he Is dropping out of notice In conse
quence. An Invalid wife playa the deuce
with a man'a aoclal career."
Here Eve, who had atretched out her
hand to ehut the carriage window, drew
It back abruptly.
"To Bay nothing of all she costs him
In fashionable doctora and German
baths. Tou don't object to that win
dow? Right the freah air la good for
you after those stifling rooms."
Mrs. Allonby did her best not to shiv
er In the freesing blast euphemistically
described as "fresh." -
"Mabel Chaloner looked very 111 when
I saw her three weeks ago."
"I daresay I The last time I saw her
that must be three months since
she had become a perfect hag. And I
remember her quite a pretty girt! But
thla la what becomes of that abom
Inbale eofa-and-broughem system you
women take to so readily. I beg your
pardon. Eve! Thank heaven, you never
Inclined to be hypochondriacal!"
Mrs. Allonby laughed faintly at the
fervor of her husband's voice. "I shook
off that influenxa pretty quickly, didn't
"Because you behaved wtth spirit,
and refused to ahut youraelf up Juat
to please old Carmlchael. I wish be
could have seen you tonglht Do you
know that Karakoff waa asking for an
Introduction to 'that very distinguished
beauty w whits,' Just before he left?
smsU) aa rAsnBsKum 111 VftUP Cxl FlI I
Eva lauftghed again. But during tbe I down bis arguments being. Indeed, for
nest few days, amid all tbe dlscom- tbe moment really gay, since bad not
forts of that relapse which followed 1 tbas Insae of "the attack"-ee nev-
me to tread a measure with you to
Major Everard started, and hla grave
face paled under Its layer of sunburn.
Of late years he had grown chary of
asking his cousin Eve to dance wtth
him. She had never, even In girlhood.
suspected the nature of his feelings for
her, never divined the existence of that
silent selfish devotion which he kept
so carefully hidden In the most secret
recesses of his chivalrous soul. Tet
was be scrupulous In the matter of of
fering' her attentions which be would
have paid without thought to any other
"I I didn't suppose you would con
descend so far," he stammered "I'm
not a first-class performer, you know."
"It's so long since we danced to
gether, I really can't place you!" Eve
smiled back. "Let's have a trial now."
Onee or twice they floated around the
great ballroom. Then Everard felt his
partner's Angers close convluslvely up
on his sleeve, and heard her whisper
"Get me out of thla place quick!
Somewhere quiet where people won't
Mecbanclally feeling her weight
grow every moment heavier on his arm
Everard made hia way out of the
crowded dancing room and through a
short gallery Into the conservatory oe
yond. There Eve fell Into a chair, pant
ing and speechless
Terrified by her ashen face and the
ominous blue line around her drawn
mouth, the man looked about him dis
tractedlydivided between fear of
leaving her and anxiety for help. Bhe
beckoned to him reassuringly wtth a
"Ifa nothing. I'm a little overtired; 1
shall be better presently. Some water
from the fountain!"
He espied an empty lemonade glass
on a neighboring table, brought the
water in It, and wetted ber forehead
liberally with a dripping handkerchief.
Still the piteous struggle for breath
went on. "I'll call someone," he mut
tered; and would have started off, but
tor her eager cry of:
Don't do anything of tbe kind! J
want no one! If you bring anyoony
here Til never apeak to you again! See,
I'm nearly well already!"
He paused, afraid to stay, still more
afraid to go tn the face of that pas
sionate appeal. And gradually her
breathing became less labored, her pat
lor leas ghastly. At the end of Ave mln
utee she sat np. saying quite cheerfully:
"That's over. Poor Tom! What a
nuisance for you! I do hope" with a
quick frown of anxiety "that Walter
didn't notice, was ne in tne oauroom
when we came away T
"I think floL"
"With a little sign of relief she began
potting the damp curls on ber forehead
My hair feels as If I'd been In the
u Really, Tom, yon might have had
regard for my appearance.
"I never thought about your appear
ance at all, was the majors tiiunt an
swer. "And I suppose It doesn't much
matter of course you'll go home
Not at once. I don't want to spoil
The major bent hla browa.
"Was It for hla pleasure yau came
here tonight?" .
Eve sprang at once to arms.
Tor my own. I'm afraid principal
ly. I love dancing. I'm a perfect child
where a ball hi In question. By the
way. Tom. you undervalue your pow
ers. I'll give you the third and tbe
Afth at Lady Holmwood'a tomorrow It
you mean to go to another dance to-
r-orrow?" aald Everard, appalled.
"Most certainly; why not?"
"Why not?" Everard'a tone waa more
than half angry now. "Because you are
totally unfit for thla life of hurry anl
fatigue and excitement Tou look lit;
you are 111 we have Juat had abundant
proof of that If you go on In this
fashion, you will do yourself some
serioua mischief. What has come over
you? When you were a young girt In
your first season, you could give np
parties philosophically enough. And
now now "
Now that I am old enough to know
better, I will not forego a single even
ing's amusement, you would say?" Eve
had grown very white again; her Hps
were quivering. "Even so, sage moral
ist. Tou see. I'm painfully conscious
thst, being so old, I shall have few
more opportunities of dancing and
must needs make the most of those
Even at the rlek of killing yourseirT"
Have vou never heard of a abort life
and a merry one? Tou needn't trouble
youraelf to assume mat aisspproving
air. I don't mean to sink Into an
aged Invalid before necessity compels
me, Just to gratify prudent persona like
Itt SJOcn Mm eary lasnion aiu mnm umr
last night" "la her husband here?"
Not yet: coming on later. "Someone
ought to send for him."
With scant ceremony Tom Everard
elbowed his way througtwthe swaying,
murmuring throng Into the little room
draped and shaded to a soft gloom
for "alttera out" where, on a heap of
cuahlona. Eve Allonby lay white and
motionless. An elderly man a great
physician who had brought hla daugh
ters to the ball bent over her, holding
her left wrist In his Angers. Lady
Holmwood, pale and shaking, was at
the head of the couch; at the foot knelt
Betty, crying helplessly.
Aa Everard, walking like a man In a
dream, came close to the group, the
elderly man drew back, with an omin
ous shake of his gray head; and the
still figure on the cushions, stirring
slightly, opened Its eyea. Stooping in
hla turn, the major caught the old, piti
"It's nothingovertired. I shall be
A pause followed a moment long aa
an hour to the man whose heart seem
ed to stand still In breathless waiting.
Then the pale Hps moved again for
the last time;
"Don't let my husband know !"
"Poor, thing, she courted her fatel
Her folly was positively criminal. She
knew from Dr. Carmlchael whom It
seems the had consulted without tell
ing any of us that her heart was all
wrong. And yet on the day of her
death she rode tn the park, went to
Sandown with her husband, and dined
out somewhere before coming on to
the Holmwood dance! Of course one
feela intenaely fr him; but Ita dlffl
cult to be very sorry for a woman who
deliberately threw away her life for
the sake of a few parties."
That Is Mra Cotterell's verdict (fen
erally allowed to be Juat by the major
tty of Eve Allonby's acquaintance. Al
lonby himself, while mlssln his wife
terribly, cannot altogether shut his
eyea to the recklessness of the behavior
which deprived him of her; In him, too,
a recognition of her folly has done
something to soften the edge of grief,
There are, however, a few softhearted
persons among them Major Everard
and Betty who. all her errors notwith
standing, find It easy to mourn poor
Eve. And these alve that "folly," rignt-
ly condemned of their leaa Indulgent
fellows, another and a gentler name.
A Proud Moment.
"The proudest moment of my life,'
said a Cleveland professional man who
was watching the circus parade, came
to me when I was ten years old. It
didn't happen here. The scene of the
memorable affair was the ancient town
where I happened to be born. There
waa a circus there on that ever-to-be-
remembered day, and, boylike, I was
at the circus grounds bright and early,
It was the old Yankee Roblson circus.
perhaps you remember the name, and
one sawdust ring waa then considered
quite enough. To my mind no modern
hippodrome, triplertnged affair has evei
touched the good, old-fashioned tent
sfluw for Build enjoyment Well, I was
walking about the Yankee Rnblson
wagon when ene of the circus men
caught sight of me. I suppose he was
seonetody in authority. Perhaps I re
minded him of a boy at home. Any
way. be picked me out ef a email army
of other boys.
" Like a rider he asked wtth a kind
"1 stammered my entire willingness.
"Up beside the band wagun driver.
behind twelve white horses? the cir
cus man went en.
"He read hia answer in my eparkllng
"-CMmb be cried, and boosted me
on to tbe high seat The band men
were putting on their fancy braided
Jacket a. and tn a moment or two w
started. What a driver that fellow
wast It fairly raiaed reins all ovet
the dashboard aa he steered his duo
decimal team Into the highway, and
hew I hung en tooth and nail as th
bulky wagon coreened.
"Well, we drove around yos) notice
the 'we' end west out of town, and
then circled a boat and came back
down a long hill, and so on through
the entire length of Main street. Thai
hill with the heavy brake on. and tht
horses plunging and slipping, nearly
scared a year'e growth out of, me, but
I forgot it all when we struck Main
street. Kor there my pis y mates be
gan to recognise me. They Jeered me,
and taunted me. but what cared I for
" 'How did It get out of the eager
shrieked one embryo hjimoriat. but I
only ran my tongue out at him. I kneu
there wasn't a youngster looking ut
at me wbo wouldn't have given hit
eye teeth to be In my place. And sc
we swept on, the caparisoned hrs
proudly curvetting, the band discours
ing and diminutive me sitting In
throned grandeur beside that mighty
eon of Jehu.
"Tee, sir, that waa the very proudest
moment of my life."
China may be a slow nation, but shf
likes fsst boats. The fastest cruiser li
the world has Just been completed by
the Armstrongs for her, and the famoui
Arm recently built her a torpedo boat
capable of covering 3S.2 knots per bour
The new cruiser is to be known aa ih
Hal Tien, of 4.4M) tons, and under nat
ural draught will have a speed of Ml
knots per hour. At this rate she couic
cross the Atlantic In about tour an
etc.. should be peeled and eaten will
a knife and fork.
Melons are eaten wtth a spoon and
The dessert Is handed to the guesti
In the same order In which the dlnnei
Is served. After the wine has bees
handed the servants retire. Then th
host should paaa the wine around th
table, beginning with the gentleman
next to him. Gentlemen offer wine t
the ladies sitting by them, but It It
hardly more than a matter of form, foi
ladles very rarely take a second glaai
The hostess gives the signal for thi
ladlea to retire by bowing to the lady
at ner husbands right hand. Sh
snouia men rise rrom her place, ai
should all tbe other ladles, and makt
her way to the door, which Is opened
by the host or the gentleman nearest
who stand by it till the ladles hav
gone out, and then closes It behind
them. The exit of the ladles takei
place about ten minutes after the ser
vants have retired, when the wine hai
passed round the table once. The
ladlea Ale out of the dining room In
the order In which they entered it, th
most Important lady leading, and tht
hostess coming last.
Coffee la handed to the ladles almost
directly after they reach the drawing
room, and It Is also taken to the dining
room for the gentlemen.
After about a quarter of an houi
over the wine the gentlemen rejoin the
ladles In the drawing room, when tea l
There Is no rule as to the departure
of the guests. The servant announce
the several carriages as they arrive tc
the guests in the drawing room, it a
lady desires to Inquire for her carriage
or to order a cab she asks the hostesi
and the bell Is rung and a servant sum
moned for the purpose. The usual
hour for departure is about 10:30.
The hostess shakes hands with t'.l
her guests on their departure, and th
guests wish one another rood night II
they pass tn going to the door, but they
do not take farewell of those who ar
not In their immediate vicinity.
Gratuities should not be offered t
servants by the guests.
A call on the hostess should be maJf
within a week or ten days by anyone
Invited to a dinner party, whether the
invitation haa been accepted or declined.
RBVENGB ON THE WIND.
Chicago has turned out another freal
In the sha: of an artist who has In
vanted a cannon which is IntnrJrd tt,
lure poor. Innocent cyclone to theji
death. Mr. V D. Hetts. who has deter
mined to cease drawing picture ant
Instead draw the winds of heaven U
their untimely destruction, haa spent
much time on his Invention, and haa at
length completed a trap which, he i
confident, will puncture the most vlru
lent cyclone that ever dodged arounl
the saloons to htt a church. He has of
tered the results of hts work to the gov.
eminent, and expects great returns. In.
aamuch aa It will, If successful, sett's
the question of the location of real es.
tate in western stmt's like Kfmtuckr.
and enable people in those localities t
invite friends to dinner with m llkelL
bood of being there to receive them.
It consists of a cannon wtth a weathel
vane and an air trigger. The gun rests
on a vertical pivot, and when the in no.
cent cyclone approaches the vane tum
the musale of the weapon directly to
ward the unprotected bosom of tr.t
wind storm. The cyclone cati.-hes Itt
toe tn the air trigger.. Bane! goes tht
charge, and the cyclone, with a bullet
tn its heart, forgets all about knocklns,
down a town and goes off among tht
clouds to die of a hemorrhage of rain.
This msy seem cruel and unsympx.
Ihetic to people In the east but west
emers consider the scheme an excelleuf
one, and win adopt It
Proving a True Story,
dome years ago, In a certain town la
the north, a gentleman possessed ol
more money than education was askej
lo address the scholars attending ont
or me local schools some Sunday after.
noon. The day arrived, says Spars
Momenta, and our friend was calk J
Well, children." said he, "I s net
used to public speaking, but I remem
ber when I waa a lad I was very fonj
of hearing a story. Shall I tell s
The children assenting, he proceeledi
"Once upon a time, many years airo.
there waa a lad, a very good lad, whj
went regularly to Sunday school, ar.j
nlwer missed. But one Sunday after,
noon, aa he waa goln' to school, twe
bad boys met him and persuaded hint
to gau blrdnestlng wlv 'em. So they
went slang by the riverside, and bt
and by they came tlv a tree, and iq
the tree, on a branch which overhung
ihe wetter, waa a nest The two bad
lads aent the good lad to climb the tret
ind fetch the eggs. Up he went and
Kot out on the branch, further and
further, and Just as he was reaching
out his hand to take the nest the ilmb
rok' and he fell In the rlViir and was
Stoppings Runaway Horse.
There waa a mild hullabaloo on Fu
perlor atreet, and people wbo ran to see
Ihe cause noticed a black hors-9 attached
o a two-seated carriage scamperlni
Vrwn the street on a dead run. As ht
lashed along several men made Inef.
fectual attempts to scare him into
standstill by heading him off sa far ai
they dared, and waving their arms an
Ihouting, but he dashed by thetn all
then It seemed a certainty that hi
srould whirl the light vehicle against I
able car, but a man ran out froir
Wood street and frightened him frorr
;he track, and then seizing th carnajr
ts it passed, clutched at something and
'.limbed In. As the distracted horsi
iwerved aside another man ran out snd
taught him by the head, and the excite
nent came to a sudden end.
"The way to stop a runaway horse."
laid a well-known lawyer who taw I'k
inisn oi tne anair, "is to run with t
lorse a stei or two and then throw
yourself on the nearest thill. Don't tr
Jt head him; you are pretty certain tt
tet hurt if you do. Put your whole
selght on the thill and Jump with ht
torse. Grab a rein If you can reach It
ind then haul him around. Anyway
ear down on the thllL No horxe can
sarry your weight very long. You a-
sure to tire him out, and he can't d)
any serious Jumping as Ion? as you
cling to tne thill. I've stopped a num
ber of horses In Just that way. Yes.
was some- time ago. Now? rto, 12.au
you," Toledo Bee.
Made a Mistake.
The Outlook says this story Is true.
and that. If you don't believe It, It can
give you the names and affidavits ol
the ladles to whom It happened: They
got Into a Royal Oak 'bus to go to
Bond street, and presently a well
dressed man with a fine diamond ring
on the middle Anger of his left hand,
came In and sat next to one -if them,
tine carried a purse In a pocket that
found itself In the near neighborhood
of the newcomer's bejeweled hand.
When the ladles got off and under
took to pay for their purchases In
Bond street, they found that they had
been robbed. The purse waa In th
pocket, but the 7 10s which It hal
contained was gone. In Its place was a
handsome diamond ring which had nol
been there before, and which was re
markably like the ring both ladles had
noticed on the hand of the man In ths
'bus. They thought the Joke of thi
supposed thief in rather bad taste un
til, on taking the ring to a Jeweler,
they found that It was worth at least
40. Now they want to know whether
the man was a mysterious philan
thropist, a misguided humorist, an un
lucky thief, or a plain lunatic
A Rattlesnake Eater.
Moses Henderson Is a sable son of
Africa and Uvea two miles from Amei
leus. Ga., In a rocky field, where rattle
snakes are must plentiful. Moses make
a living by capturing snakes and
lng them. Whenever he cannot sell b;
eats them. This Is the truth, strane-
as it may seem. Recently he killed .
large one with elev-n rattles on it. Thl
was a fat snake and Moaea ate it Tl,-
other day he brought a very larg
snake to the city, trying to r-ll lt
hide. There were twenty-threa rattle
on It The snake was very poor, anJ
Moses said It would not do to eat. an.!
be stuffed Its hide and sold It for s
good price. Every year Moss makes ii
good deal ef money selling make oi.
He saya that right down In the verte
brae of si rattlesnake is a fatty streeK
of flesh that makes oil, when friej
that will ewe any case of rheumatism.
It la atrange to how many people be
lis this rheumatic anake oil. He has
a long list of certificates from people
he haa cvred. Borne of them are in
telligent whites, who declare that fir
oil has cured them when all other rem
edies have failed. He sells a vial of the
oil for II and guarantees a lasting cure.
Moaea aaya hia father was an African
voodoo doctor and taught him how tu
cure an aches and pains with snake
oil. The negroes of tjumter county
venerate and fear him as a mysterious
doctor who can cure when all else fails,
and look upon his anake oil aa ..ia
To a young man who stood smokine,
cigar on a downtown corner 'he
ether day, saya the Chicago Chronic e
there appeared an elderly And lmpt'-tl-aent
reformer of Immemorial legenl.
How many cigars a day do you
smoke?" aaked the licensed meddler In
tther people's affairs.
''Three.'' replied the youth, as pa
Uently aa be could.
Then the Inquisition continued. "How
siuch do you pay for them?"
"Ten cents each," confessed the young
"Don't yon know, air," continued the
lege, "that If you would save that
money by the time you are as old as 1
am yon would own that big building
sb the corner?"
Do you own ItT" Inquired tb
"No," replied tbe old man.
"Walt, l do," said tbe you tig man-
Why He Wodldn't
"Win you be kind enough to take that
sack off the seat " aald a gentleman
who got Into a train.
'No. air. I don't propose to do anv.
thing of Ihe aort." rnplled the traveler,
who was alttlng on the other side of tht
"Do you say that you are going to
let that sack stay there?"
"Yes. sir, I do."
"In case you don't remove that sack
t shall be under the painful necessity
)t calling the conductor."
"You can call the conductor, engineer
tnd all the brakemen If you want to.
Perhaps you had better atop and tele,
rraph to the general manager about It"
"The conductor wtll put you off the
"I don't care If he doea. I'm not go
ing to take that sack from the place
where It Is."
The Indignant passenger went along
the train, and soon returned with the
"So you refuse to remove the sack.
So your asked he.
"Why do you persist In refusing to
remove the sack?"
"Because It la not mine."
"Why didn't you say so at onco?"
"Because nobody asked me."
Down East Curiosity.
It takes a Down Bast man to aak
questions; but once In a while one of
them Bads bis match. Jonathan over
look n gentleman who waa traveling on
horseback, notwithstanding the fact
that be had lost one leg. Hla curiosity
awakened, aa he rode alongside of
sim. te know how he chanced to meet
1th auch a misfortune.
"Been In the army, guess?" was the
"Never waa In the army In my life."
Ihe traveler returned.
"Pit a duel, p'rape?"
"Never fought a duel, air."
"Horse throwed you off, I guess, or
something of that sort?"
"No, sir; nothing of that kind."
Jonathan tried various dodges. but all
no effect At last out of patience,
Js determined on a direct Inquiry aa to
the nature of the accident by which the
fentleman had come to loee hla leg
"I will tell you,' aald the traveler,
on condition that you will promise not
lo aak me another question."
"Agreed, agreed," exclaimed the eager
"Well, sir," remarked the gentleman,
lt was bit off."
"Bit off!" cried Jonathan. "Wall, I
leclare, I'd Just like to know. nnarii
ell, what on alrth bit It off!"
"How much did those fish coat you?"
teked the friend who met him ut the
They have coat me a dollar and a
in m dosi nire, nan a dollar for mln.
Iowa, half a dollar for the ilsh, a quar.
ler for hush money to the chap who
old them to me, a suit of cloth-s and
irobsbly my church membership," ra
llied tbe Sundaj flsherman with a
unted look la hla eys.-Cbloago Tribute,
Powered by Open ONI