SIOUX CO. JOUuNAL! By GEO. D. CANON. HARRISON. NEBRASKA MADE A MUMMY OF HIM. St. Louis Darkey Hal Been Dead Fifteen Years and Not Buried. For almost 15 years the body of Jas. Fields, a negro, has remained in St. Louis unburied. It is daily viewed by many people at J. P. Murrell's Sons undertaking establishment, 1322 Mar ket street It is kept in a dark room, but anybody Is free to graze upon It. Curiosity, coupled with a desire to show that the body of a human being eould be kept Intact for an Indefinite period, prompted me to preserve this specimen." said John K. Murrell. mem ber of the firm. 'Happy Jim,' as this darkey was called by his friends, was about 28 years old when he died. His death took place at one of the city in stitutions and the body was turned over to me by a medical college. "I had been experimenting with em balming fluids and desired to see how long they would preserve a body. 1 prepared Jim's remains for the opera tion, carefully and then pumped the fluid Into him with as much care as If there had been big money in the Job. The process was so thorough that a rep etition was unnecessary. "The body is now like a mummy. Practically, it is the same in appear .,. o. it was 14 or 15 years ago, but it aaa shrunk a little and the face looks pinched and the action of the fluid has contracted the skin. Altogether the body has lost ten pounds in weight, and now weighs only 100 pounds. "Jim we always speak of him as if were alive is an object of interest to a great many people who have heard of his strange post-mortem existence, and hardly a day passes that at least on person does not call here and ask to see him. Many of the callers are negroes who once knew Jim. Strange to say, they do not seem to be afraid of him in his present state. "The teeth are Just as good as ever, and the kinky hair la still in its natural condition. The body is about an inch shorter than it was at flrsL "Jim reposes peacefully in our pine box warehouse, and he may stay there for years to come. "I do not believe there is anothei modern specimen like him in the world. "The principle of the embalming pro cess I used, I believe, is the same as that employed by the ancient Egyp tlons. The mummy of Jim Fields dif fers in no essential form from that of Rameses IL or any other body discov ered in the burial places of Egypt "It should be remembered that not the slightest odor has ever been detect ed about this body. "If Americans chose to do so, I be lieve they could preserve the bodies of the dead so effectively that they wouia sever perish, Just as did the Egyptians. "The body of Abraham Lincoln, un less I am mistaken, looks now Just as tt did when he was assassinated, near ly 36 years ago. "Bodies can be preserved without burial, If necessary. I remember the ease of an actor who played in a stock .r, .t a local theater. He died and was turned over to me to be em balmed with the request not to ship until ordered. I waited 11 months. When the order finally came the body in lust as good condition as ever. There are several formulas for mak ing embalming fluid. All of these fluids are composed of powerful chemicals. The principal ingredients used on Jim were arsenic, sulphate of sine, bichlo ride of mercury, formaldehyde and gly cerine." . , . Whan 8h Lovad Him Best "Oh, when he's so nicely dressed and bared and has such a dashing air you can't imagine how I love hlmT' A young woman said this to me one day regarding her husband-tnai-nopea-to-be, who bad Just left us. And this Is what I said in reply: "I am afraid that your love is hardly mii enough for marriage." She opened her pretty blue eyes and protested: . -rm sure I don't know what you mean!" Then I told her what I meant. There is no greater leveler on earth than marriage! It is the enemy of pretense and acting In general. You've got to lore very hard and very deeply tn stand Its disillusions. Tour Charley won't always be nicely dressed and shaved and dashing and polite. There will be days when be'H look like a nrlvate. with his forty-eight nourr growth of beard, and wear costumes that will hardly appeal to your dainty taste. He'll have his surly mornings at breakfast, too, and his days when your dinner will know him not. He nay not pick his words when he gets .nrv. and will possibly wish to read the PPW when? you want him to read Doetrr." "He never wilt" she said vehemently "1 hope not," I replied, "but they're really all very much alike. Tou must prepare for some surprises. He wears hia company manners now, but they'll chafe him a little after marriage, . .-ii tv. win often take them off think voure lust horrid," she said "Tea. I suppose I am," was my re snoaae "and so I withdraw all that rCasaid. If a a foolish thing to point Is? the recks in a road that looks all tm bat aaa mist Z Kaw York Herald. mi Journal: This is the story of tm tlMt was too b;tl tr Jr.-rt; mr the young wife is exeialm T- liety. Wiiww baahonl beat- i i se wna um ew Ml f i s BRYAN'S NEW BOOK REPUBLIC OR EMPIRE" "THE PHILIPPINE QUESTION." The Question of Imperialism Con sidered From Every Standpoint Some Extracts. Chicago. 111. (Special ) William J. Bryan is to publish a book entitled. "Republic or Empire The Philippine Question," in which he discusses ter ritorial expansion from every stand point, his argument being supplemented by chapters dealing with the various phases of the subject by Andrew Car negie, George F. Hoar, John W. Dan iels, Henry M. Teller and other states men and scholars. As to imperialism. Mr. Bryan says: "Imperialism finds Its Inspiration In dol lars, not in duty. It is not our duty to burden our people with increased taxes In order to give a few speculators an opportunity for exploitation It Is not our duty to sacrifice tH best blood of our nation in tropical Jungles lft tempt to stifle the very sentiments which have given vitality to American institutions; it is not our duty to deny to the people of the Philippines the rights for which our forefathers fought from Bunker Hill to Yorktown. Im perialism has been described as The white man's burden. But since It crushes the wealthy producer beneath an Increasing weight of taxes. It might with more propriety be called 'The man's load.' "If the peace commissioners had de manded a harbor and coaling station in the Philippines and had required Spain to surrender the rest of the land to the Filipino as she surrendered Cuba to the Cubans, we would not now be consider ing how to let go o? the Islands. If the sum of $20,000,900 had been necessary to secure Spain's release, the payment of that amount by the Phlllplnos might have been guaranteed by the United States." Mr. Bryan also says that the "pur pose of annexation is to apply to the government of the Filipinos methods fa miliar to the people of Europe and Asia, but new In the United States. This departure from traditions was not authorized by t people; whether it will be ratified p, them remain to be see a. The re sponsibility r.t first upon congress ana afterwards upon that power which makes congress. Whatever may be the wish of individuals or the interest of parties, we may rest assured that the final disposition of the Philippine ques tion will conform to the deliberate Judgment of the voters; they consti tute the court ef last resort; from whose decision there is ne appeal." Mr. Carnegie thinks: "India Is the curse ef Britain and the Philippines will be the curse of the United Stales. If you teach suppressed people at all you make them rebels. Education is fatal to the government of a superior race. The Declaration of Independence will make every ambitious Filipino a thoroughly dissatisfied subject " In war," says Mr. Daniels "it Is tne unexpected that happens. So in every great and new adventure of peace. We re asked now to sally forth 1.000 miles from our native seat to grasp, against their will, a million of unwilling people, to seize upon them, to take them by force of arms and deposit them, land and people, within the lines of the con stitution under the American flag, to make them an lntegrai part ef this American republic." According to Mr. Teller: "We shall make a mistake If we mase op our minds that we are going to govern those people from here; thst we are going to srovern them with the Anglo-Saxons whom we send out from here to admin later the affairs of that country. Tou will need your 50 000 soldiers and In a little while you will need more, for they are a great people. They are a people who know something of their rights. They are a people who are willing to contend for them and I be lieve It to be almost an axiom that a people who will light for their liberty and who are willing to die for it are anahi of maintaining It when they get It." Building Mora Trusts. Indianapolis. (Special. Capitalists of Chicago and other cities are attempt ing to secure an option on all the lauo dries of Indianapolis with a view to ward purchasing them and uniting them nto ithe combination. It is said that they have secured an option on nearly all the principal concerns of the city. In no case has a a deal been com pleted. Akron, O. Judge Kohler today over ruled the motion to dissolve the re straining order against the American Cereal company combine. He held that the new company, incorporated under the laws of New Jersay, wss a trust, therefore Illegal and against the public oiler. The Injunction was continued until the final hearing of the case. The company will appeal. Cleveland. O.-Leadlng manufactur era of stoves from sll parts of the Unit- ad States were in session hers today with the object of Using a seals of tn meet the advance In cost or material. The manufacturers say a trust is to b formed. Whorl Wages Ara "Raised JroTidne. R.I.-ieUl.-TB aa era at Robert Knight's mil at Lippitt struck Uday because of dlasatiafactlaa wit therr wages. This asaae th tftk mm la tin Fawtaetet Tattey ta strike aad tMr atChtk la taw UM. Ate Mimwi to no TROUBLE IN PHILIPPICS Small Rebellion In Island ofSegros Quickly Quelled Manila. P. I.. -(Special. lnel Fir.ith. the governor of the land of Nesros. reports that nuaer or bandits r.eadt-d by a man n .. -ie.i Pa- paijit-io, attempted a rebellii 11 and klllt-d several officials rnaylan He also captured c ;ials and Issued a prociamatk Varch JiiiM- oin lling upon the natives to rise and fccttrmi- nate the Americans and Span! rds Major Sime and two complies of the California regiment were dis patched by water to the seen? of the disturbance, and Colonel Duboce and two other companies of troops were sent overland. April 2 this fore marched twelve miles and captured Labzid. the headquarters of the ban jits, and destroyed the town. The troops also captured thirty-five prls. oners and scattered Papaisslo's forces thus effectually quelling the rebellion at the outset. There has been a week's respite in the hostilities, chiefly in order to allow the Filipinos to digest the proclamation of the United States commission. The rebels remain remarkably quiet. The sharpshooters of General Law- ton's line have borrowed the Filipino tactics and are harassing the rebels at night, picking off some of them nightly. Olalolos Is resuming Its natural stpect.-wutjness is going on, prepara tions are being a.df. to establish a per manent camp for the -uoops there and the soldiers are cleaning t city. A third of the American force at Malolos Is sent nightly to form an ad vanced line a mile north of the city. with patrols and Bentrles ahead of the line. General McArthur's volunteers are receiving Krag-Jorgensen rifles, the Filipinos having discovered that they could effectively fire their Mausers and retreat before the Americans ap- nroached near enough to use their Springfield rifles with effect. Advices received here from Samar, an Island forming a province of the Philip pines, say the revolutionists there are weary. Their leader, General Lukban. of Chinese ancestry, has deserted with Ihe funds. The Inhabitants are desirous of American rule. LOOK INTO ELEVATOR BUSINESS Interstate Commerce Commission In Session at Toledo. Toledo, O. (Special. The Interntate rommerce commission has begun the investigstion of the so-called elevator commissions In what is known as the corn belt of Ohio. There was a large ittendsnce of railroad men. Commissioner Prsuty conducted the nvestlgatlon. Charge have been made y a number of cities that the Lake hore. Nickel Plate and Baltimore Dhio roads have been shipping grain at ecular rates and then paying the ele- atms at Interior points 2 cents a bushel commission for corn and wheat nd H cent commission for hsnd'.ing. rhis arnoutits te a cutting of rates mpta'nts had be?n .-r.ade first sgaJnst he Cincinnati Northern and Pennsyl- ai.la railways, but the grand Jury failed to make an indictment. The Incinnatl Northern difcontinued the practice and some of the officers of this road were among the witnesses. The general passenger agent of trie Cincin nati Northern nas the first witness allrd. and he stated that his road had been rayltig the commissions, being forcfd to do so by the other roads now before the commission. He believed the nmmizsions should be abolished G B. fprlggs of the Nickel Plate went into he h'etory of the commission busness, tatlng that the roads leased the el. ators to private Individuals, which practically amounted to a commission. General Freight Agent Orr of the Penn sylvania read gave similar testimony, and he desired the commissions abol. iahed. A number of elevator men test- led showing that the roads were paying oinmissions. Ctrl Dies From Leprosy Columbus, O (Specal )-A special to the State Journal from Junction City. 0., says: Hannah Carey, aged 22 years. he older of the two Garey sisters, who bave bren afflicted with supposed lep rosy for the past seventeen years, died t their home, three miles from here, last evening, after two weeks of In tense suffering, the result of the dread disease invading the vital organs pro bably the heart ind lungs. Probabiy two months ago the Garcy sisters were examined by a prominent specialist on that class of direase from Chicago, who diagnosed their dlseofe a genolne lep rosy, and accordingly put them under his specific treatment, with a view of alleviating their condition, but with out success. The remains wer In terred at Salem cemetery. There Is a younger sister, II years, of age, also suffering from the disease. ihe mother and three sons are appar sully clean. The family lives on an isolated farm In Perry county, which la ihumted by all the natives; no one can be persuaded to put their foot within the limits. There is no Idea of how the children became afflicted with the Jisi-aso, and the only theory it that it aine from the father, who died some line ago, and was supposed to have con tracted It in the south during the war. The Cincinnati Commercial expresses (he hope that the Umaha bey who found the roll of $4,00 will compel the man in the deal to make a more gen erous division of the reward. As the man Is the father the boy the dlvl. lion of the spoils must be satisfactory. It Is all la the family, at least 1 - 7 f , The second wife of a Chtnaa aaa, Who Is about to be tried far rrsmst. Ing wife No. 1, shows reiaarkible de votion for an unworthy objects She Is posing ss a freak In a maiatutnto earn money enough to stydbJ. Hef AAatltv la no IMS rsJBSBraavK imm ur fepraved taste that an" fty aatraaer Mm RULING OUR COLONY PORTO RICANS ALMOST READY TO REVOLT. Lower Class Natives inrouimw. the Island Creatly Dissatisneo wltn American Retflmo. San Juan de Porto Rico. (Special.)- 4lthough there Is not at present any laneer of serious disturbance, there i nuch dissatisfaction among the lowei lass natives throughout the island, ind there has been a good deal of vlo ent talk by the Ignorant against the lew regime. The chief cause of this anti-American Veling is the Increase in the cost of iving since the American occupation ngun and the ill treatment that many f the natives of the country districts ,ave received at the hands of rougt. Mjldlcr's. Dissatisfaction is also expressed at he day in making the island a part it a territory of the United States, ith the privileges and advantages hat would accrue to the island from lurh a relation, and especially in the natter of trade. The conduct of the United States roups in Ponce. Caguas and othei jlaces has aroused many of the na- . - , , .. , In ivs to aeiena inernneivrn, uuu me encounters the soldiers have onie off second best. These collision ire probably the basis of statements nade in the United States which repre. lent the Forto Rlcans as strongly in :llned to Btart a revolution. The fact Is that a little more courtesy n dealing with them would not only lave a wonderful quieting Influence, lut would greatly facilitate the srttle nent of other questions pressing for iolution. "Give our commerce and agriculture x chance," said sn influential Porto diran merchant today to the corre- ;pondent of the Associated Press; "open ip the advantages of the country by stablishing good communications and .ransportatlon the want of which U .he chief stumbling block In our path way of development; give our people ind opportunity of appreciating the lew conditions and the benefit of a It t le more consideration on the part f the Americans who are sojourning in he island, and Porto Ricans will be 'ound the easiest people In the world o govern." Today there Is an abundance of fruit, iranges, bananas, limes and the like, otting on the trees, merely because he expense of transportation would not eave any profit on the picking Labor s abundant and falrir cond All that s needed Is capital and fair play. NO MORE MONEY FOR CUBANS. Washington. D. C. April .It was re tried by two members of the cabinet :h.at no consideration will be paid to sny proposition for money for the Cu jan army outside the U.OOO.OOO fund now awaiting their acceptance, and !urthermnre it is hinted that if too nuch trouble and deliberate delay oc cur preliminary to that amount being '.urned over to the Cubans, the 13.000,000 may be withdrawn and no payment of my sort madi- by this government on sccount f Cuban troops. No proposi tion for an additional um will be con sidered In any form, and the statement to that effect by Secrlary Hay In the ur.cfflclal Interview v.th the two dele gates from the sembty will stand. :t Is a!so staled by cabinet official that m attentlcn will be paid to the project 'or authorizing a Cuban loan. COEN AND HIS SCHEME. C. M Corn, who. it Is alleged, is en gineering the scheme for a J!0000 loan issue to tha Cuban assembly, and is said to be the author or the myste rlous dispatches to the Cuban assembly. jrglng the body not te disband on the ;round of a good rmspect of securing more than the tJ.ooo.Pfta offered by the Cnitcd States, is In Washington. Mr. Zotn tonight was in conference with a Mr. Rotenfeldl He admitted that he was the man who bad been working on the plan to establish a f:0.0O0.0vC bond Issue to be raid for out of the Cuban revenues now co.'.ectcd by th United Plates. He said he represented a syndicate with KeMO.ON) capital which Intended to place Ike loan. "I came to this city from Havana last 3unday." he said "I have nol been in ildlng. I spent one month In Cuba and a around In the open air evrry day leelng the members of the Cuban as tembly. I met General Brooke and made myself known to him. 1 explain ed my views of the situation to him. If the three million payment Is forced jn Ihe army It will rreate future dis satisfaction and disloyalty, while jotuled debt, paij out of the Cuban rev enues, would solve the Cuban problem." HAS NO MONEY HIMSELF. "How about the 120,000,000?" he was tsked. "Who Is back of It, and where is it?" Mr. Coen gave no satisfactory an wer to this question. "I have assurance," he said tonight, 'that the money will be ready the min ute the plan for a loan Is adopted. 1 have already told you that I have no capital. I arn simply doing the work." He said he did not care whether the uban assembly continued In seaslon of not. Mr, Coen offered no explanation of his business In Washington, and de led that he was here to see government officials. "I hsve nothing to do with the admin istration officials, and do not tatend to tee them," he asserted. The Connecticut Matval tit laaar aace compear has agala baaa graated Utsaai te da GENERAL NbW. A trust of the paper pad manufac turers Is being formed. No election yet in the Pennsylvania senatorial fight. The Fourth New Jersey was muster ed out at Greenville, S. C. The annual Inspection of the soldiers home at Hamptcn, Va., Is In pro vress. A. M. Clapp. formerly public printer is very ill at his home in Washington He is 80 years old. A general strike of tailors In ehop at Grand Rapids, Mich., was ordered for increased wages. If Myron C. Wick declines the presi dency of the Republic Iron and Steel company. George D. Wick will be given the place. Contracts are being let at St. Paul, Minn., for the largest grain elevator in the world. It will hold 5.500,000 bushels and will cost over J2.000.0O0. President Loubel of France has arriv. ed at Montellmar. France, his native place, for a visit The meeting between him and his mother was very affecting. Frank McBrlde, who claims to be a laborer, but whom the police say is a crook, was fatally shot at New York by William F. Murray, colored. The Missouri house tabled a resolu lion condemning Governor Stephens for Insinuating that some democrats and republicans conspired to defeat the re vision work, making an extra session necessary. The British ship Austria, from Mobile. January 9, for Belfast, Ireland, is over due. The Greenwich Fire Insurance com pany has been again allowed to entet Kansas for business. It is reported from Austrian Silesia that three emperors will meet next au tumn at Sklernlwloe. Poland. France has granted a temporary drawback on sugars used In making transparent soaps for export. Gus Tldwell was stabbed to death at Macon, Ga., by Charles Burge because of a quarrel over Burge's sister. of the soldiers In shrdl cmfwyp cmfwyp The American delegation of women to attend the auintennial in London in June, next, will sail from New York Jue I. The Southern New England Meth- nAimt rnnfprenre nrotests a gainst the admission of Congressman-elevt Rob erts of Utah. Representatives of the cracker com bine are on the Pacific coast seeking to areanlxe the factories into a Pacific coast trust. The town council of Bournemouth, Kng.. Instructed the mayor to visit American Ambassador Choate to ex press hope of his speedy restoration to health. The Stone. Sand and Gravnl company of New Orleans, at i 49-100 cents pel yard. Is the lowest bidder on Ihe ro- moval of 7.&M.000 yards of earth in the Yazoo canal. The New York chamber of commerce has received from the London chambei of commerce a letter of thanks for th New York exchance's expressions ol sympathy on the death of Lord Her hell. An Upheaval in Russia London. (Special.) The St. Peters burg correspond-nt of the Times tele graphs sn alarmist report against thi spreid of serious labor troubles ant strikes In the manufacturing district! of Russia. Ominous rumors, he says are In circulation In St. Petersburg re porta of troops sent to suppress out breaks, of the wholesale destruction o property, of numerous at rests and o the gaggng of the press yet not hal at what Is happening ever reaches thi ears of the capital. Towns, mills and factories, the corre spondent declares, are literally lnun dated with seciet socialist and revolu lor.ary proclamations by agitators, wm are undoubtedly assisted from abroad. All this, together with the agitatloi fostered by the students, creates a serl eus political outlook. Sioux Falls' Big Company Sioux Falls. 8. b. (Special.) The salt of the plant of the Northwestern Pack mg company to Theron Davis of Net York city, representing capitalists d that city, resulted todsy In the foima lion of a corporation with a capHai ol H.CW.nOO to operate the property. Thr millions were taken by Mr. Davis par for the New York syndicate. Lester Heyer. a prominent New York packer and Charles T. Crocker, capitalist, Fitchburg. Mass., arrived here todsy These three gentlemen, with Edwin D. Clark and Jesse D. Boyce of this clt were elected a board of directors, who this afternoon elected as president Ihe company Mr. Heyer, who will lo cate here and give the plant his per tonal attention. Shot His Father Timothy Brasnahan, who lay dyln at the German hospital at Kansas City from a pistol shot wound Inflicted by his son. John, called the latter to hi bedside, and between groans and gasps tdvlsed the son how he might best ss- :spe the trouble In which his crime had involved blm. Brasnahan, who was trading contractor, was shot by the son luring a family quarrel. When told h :ould not live, the elder Brasnahan call id for his son, and grasping the lad' jand, ssld feebly; "Get out of this trou jle ss best you esn, John. I'll do all ( can to save you before I die. I hope fou won't get Into much trouble about X. It was mostly my fault; yon bad to hoot me." "I did not mean to kill you, iather," groaned the boy, and as ha aaa placed under arrest and lad away, so passed his mother, who had ro sea Uy beta dlveroed from the dying ataa, watatag la tha aaltway. raa- Homeward Voyage of Ona of Daw ay's Cruisers. Fayal. Azores. (Special.) The United States cruiser Raleigh, Captain Joseph B. Coghlan, from Manila, on Dec. 1J, is roallng here, will coal at Bermuda on April S. and expects to reach New Y'ork April 15. The Raleigh has been having stormy weather In the Atlantic, but has been behaving splendidly and proves to be good sea boat. All on board are well. After leaving Manila, on Dec. 15. the Raleigh stopped at Singapore. Colombo, Aden, Port Said. Alexandria. Malta. Algiers and Gibraltar. In all the Brit ish colonies the officials of the British irmy and navy and the civilian popula tion gave the American warship an en thusiastic welcome, showing her officers ind crew every form of courtesy. Din ners with American decorations and American national music were riven to aptaln Coghlan and his officers every- here. In marked difference to the re- eptlnn of the Raleigh on her outwars passage two years SRO. Governors, generals, admirals ana ther high ofTirlnls all wished to visit nd Inspect the ship. The Ralelrh still has her war paint At Singapore she met a Spanish ransport having on board troops and allors from Manila. Although flying a arshlp's pennant, the Spanish ship owered her colors and permission was rranted the Spaniards to visit the Ra leigh, where they fraternized with the mcrican sailors, who gave them mucn- eeded food and clothing Many of tne Fpaniards showed the Americans tne ounds Inflicted upon them by shells f the American fleet. At the island of Mnlta In the Medlter- ... . . ri-i, l.b ranean, the unieign mei int nm Mediterranean fleet, consisting ef ten sattleshtps and a number of cruisers. fhe British sailors extended a most ordial welcome to the Americans, and he sailors of the fleet and the soldiers )f the garrison entertained the crew of he Raleleh ashore, the best ef feeling prevailing. During her stay at Malta, the rta- elgh was crowded with Britisn rea- oats and bluejackets. The American officers were entertaln- d at Cairo by L'nlted States Consul Harris, and all the British and Egypt- an officers were present. The Frrnch at Algiers showed a narked difference There was no re- eption except from the Bnllah and Vmerican residents, though the French ifflclals were polite. At Gibraltar th crew of the Raleigh aw the Spanish fleet commanded, by admiral Camera It consisted el sis ihlpa and was anchored across Algecl- as bay The Fpanish fleet and the I'.a- eigh salted at the same time and pro ceeded close to each other. The Ra- elgh hoisted the Spanish flag and sa uted It. The salute was promptly re turned by the Spanish admiral from his lagshlp, the Emperor Carlos V. The alelgh In two years has cruised M.OOO niles. PERSONAL AND OTHERWISE. Observe, ye strawberry fiends, the ast "blizzard of March did not injure he vines. Providence Is with as yet, (on bet. It Is a waste of money to pay cable oils on a dispatch giving the temper- iture at Manila. Even at Ibis distance t looks quite warm. Two-headed sea serpents are reported ilong the Atlantic coast resorts. The errors of imperialism are coming into lew rather early. A Jersey man has applied for a'dl- orce because his wife put chunks ef ubber In his hash. Men are mighty sard to get along with nowadays. Governor Roosevelt observes that, at Untlago, be could have eaten his hat t stewed with onions and potatoes. He felt that way before his round rebin roast. A sonorous poet of Imperialism meg- tphones: "Oh young snd brave, rail nto ranks, fall In!" At last acreunla he poet hsd not presented himself at i recruiting office. Ez-Congressman Jerry Simpaen ad nits that be Is writing a book about A'ashlngtcn life, but declares he will mock the socks off any critic who Masses him with "them dura literary rellers." The proposition to return Santa Ina's wooden leg, captured In the Mei can war. Is favorably considered by ,h solona of Illinois. Evidently the an ient member does not reapond to a pull. The agricultural college of Maryand announces that every peach bud In the Itate has been killed. This Is a trifle it ronger than former annual announce jients, but Its whiskers are of the same vintage. William K. Vanderbllt, Jr . Is to get 110.000,000 as a starter on his wedJing, ind his bride has 15,00,000 of her own. By merging these sums the young -ouple ought to keep the wolf at a dis tance for a few years. Victory is perched on the banner at Ihe United Mine Workers' union of tha Mississippi river, as the miners and operators of Iowa effected sn agree ment mutually satisfactory to all con :ernd some ten days ago. The agree ment reached Is brief but comprehen sive, snd Includes the eight-hour work dsy. A convention to organize a slata 'abor union or congress In Georgia will be held In Atlanta, convening at 10 o'clock on the morning of Thurs iay, April 27, and contlnua la sessloa two or three dsys. In 1IM there were soma TM pwbllo nd MT prlvste schools In Cuba, with in sversge attendance of M.W ckB 4ren. For a long tlmo, awtag ta tha meager facilities at homo, tha waaltklaf Cubans have been sendlag their Ohfl dren ta tho Ualtod ltat ta ho rat ad. , 77