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About The Sioux County journal. (Harrison, Nebraska) 1888-1899 | View Entire Issue (Aug. 26, 1897)
WOTMMS FEEDS THE CHICKENS A wbik? before the iun linn roue. 'N' father builds the kitchen fire, Our bit; black rooster crows 'u' crows, 'Z if bin ueck would never tin; 'N'en we t-'et up V feci the stock V water Fuiinie 'u' milk the cows, 'ii' fix a cate er broken lock; 'N'eu after brenkfun' father plows 'S' mother feeds the chickens. The paii'ukes Wallte wouldn't eat 'N" eorubread left on Murjorie's plate, A scrap of toust, a bitf meat, 'N' all li e stuff what no one ate, She puts it in that worn-out tin, Throws out Rome graiu, V pretty quick She hollers nearly 'g loud ' she kin, "Come chick! chick! chick! chick! chick! chii-k! chick" So w hen she feeds the chickens. You'd ought to nee old Top-Knot run, 'V Itanty hop he's hurt one Ick 'S' riyinouth Hock (the bigges' one She lavs a 'nornioiis inoiiKtriis egg! 'N'en Sockle, with her new-hatched brood, A-clucfcin' to 'em 'a hard's she kin, N" shown' 'em the niees' food She gets it fer 'em out the tin, 'N' pecks the other chickens. Old Gray, our cat, comes snoopin' roun' 'N' slyly peeks from hind the stoop; F any meat's there he is boun' 'T shant no to the chicken coop. Now filled with nil an owner's pride, Wee Willie comes with wondering eyes, That look so brown V bright V wide; He loves to watch 'em, V he cries "lies see my baby tickens!" I love to ride the colt a lot 'N' i0 fer berries to the patch; I love to see our dog 'n' Spot Get in .1 turble scrappin' match; 'N' tho' it's kiud o -quiet fun, I like it nearly best of all; That's why I alius cnt V run To see 'em 'f I Tiear the call "Come chick! chick! chick! chick! chick! chick! chick!" When mother feeds the chickens. Will h. Davis, iu Chicago Hecord. A JEALOUS WIFE. "Out every night until 2, and you le lleve him when he says it Is business!" said Mrs. Merkle, pursing up her lljw. "Ah, well, you are an innocent In nib, Doris Moore." "Hut, Aunt Sarah, why shouldn't I believe what my huHband says when he always tells the truth?" said young Mrs. Moore, indignantly. "Because he Is a inun," said Mrs Merkle, nodding her bond. "I've had three husbands Thompson won the first. lie was a good provider, but he provided for two, and I got a divorce and alimony. Then I married Max well. I caught hitn kissing the hlted help and began my Investigation. The Mime old story. However, he died, and that ended It. As for Merkle, I have -my thumb on hint, but I got It by searching his pockets. Men are sueti J idiot they leave their love letters an, where. When I'd collected a pack 1 read them aloud to him one evening. He stays at home now after oiiu-e hours, unless he goes out with me, and he don't write anything but business letters. He is old. you know, and . deacon wants to keep up a reputation - for resH'ctabillty. , Hut your youiu husband what should he care If p-o-ple talked nliout him' Oh, there is a woman at the bottom of this 2 o'clock business, I'll warrant you." "Why, Aunt Sarah, how dare you?" cried Iioris, stamping her foot. "Huminage your husband's coat pock cts and you'll find I'm right," said Mrs. Merkle. "And unless you want n di vorce, which I don't advise when i man Is only on a salary, show lilm what you find, make a scene ami end It early." , "Why, you talk as If you knew some thing alxtiit Owen, Aunt Sarah," said Doris. "I know he is a man," said Mrs. Mer kle. "Hullo!" cried a voice at the door, which opened at this moment. "Here is Aunt Sarah talking against men as usuaKjwhat has poor Merkle done iiowJ I thought he had sowed bis ' wild oats." "Iook out for your own crop, Owen Moore," replied Mrs. Merkle. "I don't set up for a saint and neve -did," cried Owen. "Give me a kirs, Doris, I'm as hungry oh a hunter, at.d fl must eat and run. It's nil night again, f Doris Well, so much more In the wiv. lugs bank, and. Indeed, we've no rea son to be sorry." "1 mil- you very much, Owen," said DorlH, a she brought a hot disk fro n the oven and set the chairs at th ta " Me. "I'm as lonesome without you tin a kitten without Its mother." "I keep thinking of you, too," said Owen. "Oh, Indeed, I don't like it a nit, but I 8ii y a dollar put up for a rainy day may keep us from tho heart ache." lie ate his supper In a hurry, lough ln and talking the while, then, kissed his wife, shook hands with her aunt and took up his hat again. Out on the tfnlrti he paused n moment. . Aunt Sarah' shrill voice was lifted once more; "Jlon't I see how honest lie Is?" s.ie was repenting. "All very well, Dor.s, but look in his coat pockets all the saato look In his coat Mckets." "Old cat! She's at it again," sn'id Owen, who heard, but like the good natured man that he was. he only laughed as he rat) downstair. "The devil will fly away with old Aunt ftarah one of these days, but she can't make my lxry lielleve any 111 of me, that's one eomfort." Meanwhile Mrs. Merkle had j'ntu i, home to tell her unfortunate spons. and Doris sat herself down with her J f'H on the hearth, and thotiKht over all y she had heard. Aunt Ka rah. was a very unpleawint person, who a I way mado Iroul U wn'rever alie went, but she had thu lputallon of Imlng very wnslbV. which miclt people are more opt to g iln than cheerful, ajirUible folk, f.nd what 1 Mid ft he really lieileved, for she hid no good thoughiH of a n.au or wmnin. Hut Doris was very much in lov with Owen, and Jealousy is always close at band where love Is strong. In vain Doris tried to convince litr- elf that Owen was too much 'i. lore with her to think of anyone else. I he little si-ed of sUHjiicion had been plant ed, and It fjrew like Jack's beanstalk. It was lonely there In the lit tit tipper Hat at night, and Doris bed been used to a large family circle before the lHt her country home to share Owen; for tunes iu the city. After awhile she found herself crying she hardly knew why feeling not only lonely, but neglected and Injur-d. "Owen ought not to have left mo even for buslm-ss," he said, "lie used to come every night when he was courting, though it was an hour's jtir ney by rail each way." And from this she went on asklug herself if it were possible that Aunt Sarah could be right. New York was ruch a wicked place; there were such Itold, audaclotm women to be met with: Owen ws so handsome. Oh, could Aunt Sarah have grounds for her sus picions! Owen, waking early one morning, caught his wife turning his iockets out, reading the bits of paier she fonud there. A fiote from cousin Johi, who had d-slred to borrow $5; a typewrit ten circular, recommending Stump's restaurant; a letter from his mot'acr telling hi in of the doings at home. Nothing but what she had steu he fore. And Owen, whose conscience wag as clear as man's could le, was not In the least alarmed. Doris might rend all the lerte's he ever nn-elved, nil he ever had received, for the matter of that; but ho did not like to think that she would watch and spy upon him, that an old woman's prattle could make her suspicious of 1dm,' He had heard the advice t'lai Mrs. Merkle gave his wife as he sroed out tide tlie door of his little dining-room, and he was very sorry tha Doris should take It and search his pockets. lie had a good mind to speak out. frankly, to tell his wife what he had heard and what lie had seen, find to as sure her that his story of night worl; was true: to take her with him to the great piano factory where he wn em ployed, and convince her bow ilie hours were spent. That would lnj a serious way of making all right Hut suddenly an Idea popped Into hi jelly head. "I'll turn It all into a joke." be sal 1 to himself. "I'll make Dory well ashamed of herself, the darling. I.'?; write a love letter or two and put the.ii In my -pocket ami let her Aid the.ii. Then there'll be a row, and when it's gone far enough I'll out with the truth. A bit of a joke settles tilings the best way." It seemed such a comical hhf that he burst out laughing over li's bicak fast, and nearly choked himself twic; in trying to swallow his joke wi'.! bin Coffee. However, he bad not time to carry cut his plan until Sunday ea;ic. Then, while his wife was busy over the dinner, he took from its likling place a little parcel of pink-tinted pa per, with a rose at the top of tliff sheet, and concocted three Idiotic and ex travagant love letters, signed them, "Your beat beloved and ever loving Fanny Ann." ami put them Into en velops addressed to himself. He was rather clever with I.U pen. and Imitated a woman's baud very well. Having first sft!ed thepe up, and then cut them open again, he hid them in the Hckets of the clothes he wore on holidays, and which he did not wear on Monday when he wei.t to work, left them hanging In the waiil rolM. There they might have remained, for Doris had grown ashamed of her mis picions of Owen ami determi led never to ransack bis pockets, but that Aunt Fa rah uropped In again afar Owen had left the house. "Out again?" tdie said, with a ncd. "Yes, and hard at work, jnior bey." leplled Doris. "Aunt Sarah, I'm xure that he is aa true to me as one nuro could be to another." "I should like to look through his !Kcket8, though," giggled Aunt Sarah. "Iyook, then," said Doris, throwing open tlie wardrobe door. "There are his things." Aunt Sarah took her nt her word, and n moment more her shrill, vixenish voice cried out: "Three pink notes, my dear; and all slgiK-d Tanny Ann.' " An hour afterward, Doris sat at the t enter tnl !e In her little parlor sobb'ug violently. The light from the shaded lamp fcli upon the three pink notes, all wet with tears, Owen's compositions, as we know, and so absurdly rapturous and Idiotic lhat they would have betrayed the fact that they were jokes to any but a Jealous woman. Hut Doris, In her woe and wrath, had very little common fense left. Aunt Sarah, frightened by the storm her own de-d had raised, had taken her departure, and Doris had resolved to wait for Owen's return, show hlin the letlers, and at once go home to her mother. For awhile It had scorned to her that she would And at home a refuge and consolation for all her woes. Then she began to wince will) mortlllcation. To tell her mother that Owen was false to her would not be so bad, but that her listers should know It, her friends. Jin k's wife, (he whole connection. "Oh! Life would not be worth liv ing under siwli circumstances!" Doris cried out, ami then an awful thought emit Into her mind and gained strength there, - A Jealous man or woman Is a maniac, Iet that be an ex cuse for Doris when she erlod out at last: "Death la the only cure! Death! P !h! And If God will not kill me I must kill inj self!" At 2 o'clock Owen opened the door of his lint and went in. Things did uot look as UHjal. The kitchen tire had gone out, ami no little snack had been kept warm for him. The lied In the lit tle lxHlroom was still neatly made Mp. and no one had slept in it that nig'jt. In the parlor the lamp was yet burn ing, but Doris was not there. As he looked alniut him be saw doors and drawers open, things scat tered aliout, and a nameless terror be gan to possess him. "Doris!" he called aloud, but there was no answer. He walked to the ta ble. There lay three sheets of pink paper with a weight upon them to keep (hem from blowing away, and be side them another letter addressed to himself. I'oor Owen could hardly command himself sutliciently to teat this (.pen and read the contents. "I have read Fanny Ann's letters. Aunt Sarah found them in your pocket. Oh, Owen! I tVought you loved me, but your heart has lieen stolen by that wicked woman. I was niot preity enough or good enough to keep you true, but now that you are false I do not care to live any longer. I am go ing to drown myself and leave you free. Your broken-hearted "DORIS." And this, then, wns how his jok had ended. This was what he had brought about. Doris had killed her self. Then, he would follow her ex ample. But first he must find her lody. and pay It the last honors. He caugh' up his hat and left his desolate home,, the tears gushing from his eyes as h remembered how happy he hud Liec there. When he reached the street he stood bewildered, .asking himself which waj he should go, what he should do. Then It c-amo to him that he must report the horrible facts at the statiou house and have an alarm sent out. The police would know what to do letter than he could; and with heavy steps and reel ing brain he sought the big brick build ing before which the great lamps him. and entered iu. I-nte as it was., there was a little crowd there, gathered about sonnnUin;,' that lay in the middle of the floor. "What is it?" lie gasped, with wnlr l:ps that could scarcely form a sound. "Young woman jumped into the riv er," cried a policeman. "My God!" cried Owen, bursting through the crowd, and falling on his knees Itefore the wet figure lying on the floor, witli a olieeman's coat un der Its head. "My God! It is my wife!" The next Instant he gave a big howl of joy, for the great eyes unclosed themselves, tlie little trembling hand were outstretched toward him, and a faint voice said: "Oh, Owen, take me away from this dreadful place and all these dreadful men." For Doris, although she had really thrown herself from the end of a whar Into the river, had been promptly flail ed out by the river police, ami although soaked to the skin, terribly frightened and' heartily ashamed of herself, was very much alive, indeed, and When Owen had whispered .something in her ear the story of his Joke, which we al teady knowcould only sob: "Forgive me, Owen, pray forgive me." "She was a bit out of her mind, y we, with a ,sort of fever," Owen ev plalued, "and God bless those who saved her to nie." Then he took his wife home, and whatever else has come to Its hmniile door'siwe that day, the green-eyi d monster. Jealousy, has never entered. Dublin World. A Gopher F.noe. While tlie trahi bearing the excur slon'.sls to Hawkiusvllle was rolling through I'uhiski County last Thursday a peculiar looking fence, Inclosing a garden, wtis noticed by some of the pa.sf'-v'or' The fence was nm.de of boards a 1 tout two feet high, and they wer tuck tn tlie ground so close to-gthci- th:'t no cracks were left. They also leiine'i. outward and were held In poslron by banks of earth thrown against them on each side. One pas senger wanted to know what good such a fcti'v would do. A second passenger said that it was to keep out rabbits, A third passenger replied that such a fence could nM keep out a rabbit, and said that it wns de.slgm'd to keep out gophors. This last guess was accepted as tie proper solution of the question. The passengers had never ls-fore seen a gopiicr fence Middle Georgia I'rest. Archery. The Cretans HJ'e said to have bean the (Irst people to practice archery, they having Iennx-d tho art from Apollo. Three of Fnglnnd's kings and two royal prince were killed by ar rows Harold and his two brothers came to their death by arrows shot from the cross-ltows of tlie Norman' soldiers. William Hufus was killed by, nn arrow shot at a deer, and Klolmrd I., who revived archery In Kngla.nd, was finally slnln by nn arrow. Three' great battles of Fngllsli history, Crecy (i:Gti),l'olctlers (l.Tid) and Aglncourt (Ml.-)), were won by the nrchers. Iu those (lays there were men who -ould shoot nn nrrow from fitH.) to TttX) ynrds tind Uoblu Hood Is said to liave shot, from HK to StK) ynrds. Kenyon coli lege, Ohio, liwluded archery as one of tlie courses of study nlxuit throe score years ago. Tut Where They 1MJ the Mont flood, "Mister," said tlie small boy to the druggist, "xlve me a bottlc o' then) pills you Hold father day before yesterday." "Arc they doing him good?" asked tho chemist, looking pleased. "1 d'no whether they're doln' father any good or not, but they're doln' me good. They Just lit my air gun!" Odds and Knds. A lazy man can't help it auy utofv Oian an Industrloue man cua. 1 Wood-Stone. From a mixture of magnesia and Sawdust, subjected to a high tempera ture and great pressure. Dr. Otto Leh I'ig has produced a substance which he cidls "xyolith." or "wood-stone." It tan be cut with tools, but, it is said, does not bum, and does not absorb noisture. The inventor thinks it should prove useful as a building material. f-'wlft-Flying: Clouds. Mr. Clayton, of the Blue Hill Observ atory, near Boston, reports that obser vations made there show that the aver age speed with which clouds, between KO'k) and 9.1MX) feet high, move is sixty miles an hour In midsummer, and one hundred and ten miles an hour In mid winter. The swiftest flight of a cloud yet measured was 230 miles an hour. A IMiKeon Race. In France pigeons are regarded as valuable messengers iu ease of war, and recently the French Minister of War offeri-d a prize for the winner of a pigeon race from rerlgueux to Parle, 20 miles. No less than 2,740 birds were entered in the contest. The winner made the distance in seven hours thirty-four minutes, an average of over thirty-four mdes an hour. Ice-Break i na Fhip. Vice Admiral Ma.karow, of the Rus sian navy, Iijis been studying the con struction and use of powerful Ice breaking ships. At a recent meeting of the Imperial Geographical Society at St. Petersburg, he expressed his belief that with two such ships, each of ten thousand horse-power, acting together, a line of free water communication could be kept open in winter to tlie port of St. Petersburg, and he added that they could even force their way through the glacial ocean if the thick ness of the ice did not exceed twelve feet. The Flight of the Pnn. Astronomers know that the sun, ac companied by the earth and the other planets, Is moving toward a point in the northern heavens with great speed. Just what the velocity is, however, can rot yet be told with certainty. Prof. Simon Newcomb. in a recent lecture, Mi id that It was probably between five miles and nine miles per second. The bright star Alpha Lyrae lies not far from the point toward which the' sun Is moving. EveYy moment we are get t:ng nearer to the place where that star now is. "When shall we get there? Probably in less than a million years; perhaps In half a million." A Short-Lived Inland. In 18117 a new shoal was discovered Irj the group of the Tonga, or Friendly Inlands. In 1S77 smoke was seen over the shoal. In 18S5 the shoal had be come a volcanic Island, more than two miles long and 240 feet high, and a r.i rce eruption was taking place within It. In 1880 the Island had begun to shrink in dimensions, although the next year Its highest point was 325 feet I'bove sea level. In 1880 its height had diminished one-half, and the ocean close around It was more than a mile deep. In 181)2 the Island rose only about twenty six feet above sea level. According to the latest Information, its complete disappearance, under the ac tion of the waves, will not be long de layed. Ulah-Prlced Bumblebee, Many years ago the farmers of Aus tralia lniKrted humhlcltcctt from Eng land and set them free in their clover I. elds. Hefore the arrival of the bees clover did not flourish in Australia, but rfter their coming the farmers had no more difficulty on that score. Mr. Dar win had shown that bumbleltoes were the only Insects fond of clover nectar vhlch possessed a proboscis sutlicient ly long to reach the bottom of the long, tube-like flowers, nnd, at tho same time, a body heavy enough to bend down the clover-luwl so that the pollen would fall on the Insect's back, and thus be curried off to fertilize other Powers of the same species. According to a writer In Popular Science News, the bumblebes sent to Australia cost the farmers there aliout half a dollar 1 piece, but they proved to be worth the price. A 'imrrnw l'rlmn Dnnmi. Monsieur Mingaud, a naturalist of Mines, France, gives, in Ln Hevue Sci ( i!tlflue, nn Intercut Ing account of the musical accomplishment of a sparrow in his collection of living birds, lie en pt tired the sparrow soon nfter It had been hutched, mid fed It by hand until it could care for Itself. Then he placed It In a cage containing a challiiich, a Ktld finch and two canaries. Alter a time the spnrrow learned to warble like the finches and to trill like the cnnarles, the Imitations being so er feet as to deceive the enr. f In spring Monsieur Mingaud Is accustomed to keep a box of crickets near his bird cages. Two dnyb after tue crickets bad been placed near the cage contain ing tho sparrow the latter began to imi tate their cry, Intermingling It with Its r.ngs. Even after the crickets had long lieen dead the sparrow remember ed Us lesson, and continued to repeat their ery. None of the other birds at tempted to lmlUttc the crickets. Singu larly enough, tlie sparrow never uttere the peculiar sijuulling cry of Its own species .having been removed from It nest too early, apparently, to have learned it KANSAS TWISTERS A Few Little Anecdote Told by a Truthful Witness. "I've heard so many tueredible stor is about the cyclone and Its eccen trieitiejj.' said the solemn looking man to a party of tourists he had joined In the sleeping car, "that I've been to Kansas making some iorsoii&l In vestigations In the interest of science. "I find that many reports from that section have been grossly exaggerated. Nothing occurs there that is not In aecord with our understamding of theso terrific outbursts of nature. For instance, the tornado, often mistakun for the cyclone, has a rotary motlon. I have known it to dip low enough to bore a well and then bound once more to the region of the clouds. This wonderful phenomenon was an accomplished fact In far less time than it takes nie to tell of It. "An extensive farmer here heard the roar of an approaching storm and Just had time to get his team from his reaper to a place of safety. The wind eaug'it the reaper and sent It round and round and round the Immense tract, till the grain was all cut." "But didn't It blow away?" "Not at all. That would have de stroyed our theory. Tlie circular whirl at the Irresistible power swept the grain to the. center of the field and Into an immense stack such as human hands could not have piled. "Ore of the strangest atid best au thenticated Incidents 1 learned of oc curred where a cyclone struck the base of a mountain and went burrowing throrgh It. A few feet in the twister encountered a solid giunite formation. It was two weeks later whom tlie tun-1 nel was completed and the terrific wind resumed its devastating way on the other side. The tunnel was prompt ly appropriated by a railroad com pany." "I had ratlier an unpleasant exper ience in that section,'' said one of the tourists. "I lKught a little farm there, just to be a landholder. Everything In three counties was plastered thick with mortgages. A cyclone wound them all up into one great package and pasted them down on my little place. We drilled and blasted to get them off, but it was no go. My farm is mort gaged $40,000,000 deep." The solemn man of science never turned a hair, but took notes. Detroit Free Press. Cause and Effect. "Never tell your dreams" is an oft repeated bit of advice, yet' it is proba ble tliat few persons do things in their dreams that are more foolish than some things they do when they are wide-awake. "I had a very singular dream last night," said a boarder, as he came down to breakfast one morning. "I dreamed I was a iectato.r at one of those eculiar institutions known ns 'cake-walks.' I was the only white man present, and was enjoying the novel sensation of watching for the first time a procession of gorgeously arrayed couiels making tlie circuit of a large room in the most stately and impos ing style imaginable, when suddenly the master of ceremonies saw me, took me by the arm, led nie to the center of tlie hall, called a halt, and the entire assembly gathered nbout me, and be gan to Jabber in an unknown lan guage. "All at once I liegan to grow tall. I felt myself rapidly expanding in an upward direction. The crowd at my feet seemed to dwindle. My head pushed Its way up through the ceiling, then through the roof, and probably It would have bumped against the moon In another minute If I hadn't waked up. It wns u narrow iwca.pe." "Ami you saw and did all this at a cake-walk, did you?" asked one of the regular boarders. "Yes, that's what I said." "H'niph! What have you eaten for supier?" "Nothing but a plate of buckwheat cakes." "That explains it What you saw In your dream was a buckwheat cake, walk." v A stroke of Diplnmacy, Applicant I have called to nsk yon, madam, to ii'-eyour influence in my be half. 1 am an applicant for a posi tion in your husband's private ollice, but I have one dangerous rival. He seems to prefer Madame (interrupting) -I'm sorry, sir, but J never interfere with my hus band's business. Applicant If I were as pretty as she Is I might Madame She? Applicant Yes, .madam; my compet itor Is a most bewitching girl. Madame Just call to-morrow, sir, and I may have the position for you. Washington Times. A J ilft ifleut Ion. Mother (coming swiftly) Why,' Wil lie! Striking your little sister? Willie (doggedly) Aunt Frostface made nie! Aunt Frost race Why, Willie! I said if you did strike her I would never kiss you again. Willie (still dogged) Well, I couldn't let no chane like dnt slip. Judge. Worried. Wlnililedi-i; Whnt's on your mind, old man? Is your wife or any of your ( HMren sick? llaukl.iiv-Ilenvens, It's a moie serl c; y v t iler than that! I'm afraid we're i i,t n to have a base-ball team here tills season. Cleveland leader. If a baby la good at all other tlmei, It is bound to howl when IU mother and father Invite their unmarried friends In to envy them. Riding Hindi Off the Bar. There are various reasons why the reprehensible practice of riding with bauds qff the handle bars should be generally abandoned. Chief among ;hese reasons, perhaps, Is the fact that It is dangerous not only to 'the rtder himself, but to others. To do the trick successfully, it is necessary to traveL'. at a speed which Is not safe, at least on a street which Is liable to 'be cross- . . ed anywhere by pedestrians or other riders, and it is juft such thoroughfares' that the senseless hands-on rider se lects to ' show himself off. With the ' hands off the bars the rider has no con trol of the wheel, and particularly at crossings, there is no telling at what instant it is necessary to make a detour or slacken speed. Just the fraction of time necessary to regain control of the wheel often is enough to cause an acci dent. With no guiding power there Is no telling what the front wheel is go ing to do. A email olistacle in the street which would ordinarily be passed over ' without notice Is enough to deflect the front wheel and, if there are any rid ers close, send it crashing into their bicycles. Noise Means Damaee. When your bicycle makes a noise it is a sure sign that something is wrong. The perfect running machine is noise less. A jingling sound usually Indi cates that spokes have broken loose from their fastenings at crossing points; a distinct click indicates spokes loosened at tlie rim; what might be termed a jogging noise is usually caus ed by a loose crank; loud snapping al most Invariably conies from a dry chain, and a loose sprocket will thump. No matter what the noise is, or from wliat part of the machine -it comes, it indicates trouble that should be promptly attended to. What a Collision Means. A man of 150 pounds weight, and moving at the rate of ten feet ier sec ond (about seven miles an hour), has a momentum' of 1,500 pounds, without counting the weight of his wheel. This is sufficient to have surprising effect on the ordinary pedestrian. A collis siou between two 150-pound riders wheeling at the moderate rate of seven miles an hour would result in a smash up with a force of 3,000 pounds. No wonder bicycle accidents are often serious! Depend on the Right Foot. It is a singular fact, but true, that the majority of cyclists depend on the right foot to push the machine along. In proof of that, if the balls on a crank axle are examined those on one side will be found more worn than on the other. That Is accounted for by the fact that the greatest strain is on the right side. Scorchers. "How long did it take you to learn the bicycle?" "Me? It wasn't three days before I could lie as fast as any of them." Indianapolis Journal. Tyres Have you named your boy yet? Spokes No; my wife wants to name him after her wheel and I want to name him after mine. Judge. Walker They say that Napoleon waa so self -possessed that not even the sound of a pistol fired close to his ear could make him start. Wheeler He wouldn't have much show in a bicycle race. Indianapolis Journal. Some people have stopped eating grapes for fear of appendicitic, and It is now said that the bicycle is a prolific cause of that disease. Stop eating hi cycles. Louisville Courier-Journal. Mrs. Yanwnrt (rising up in lied horri fied) Reginald, what made you sweat so when you stepped on that tackl Van wart (wildly) For a moment I thought I wns cycling and had puno ured my tire. Puck. An Informal Meal. In Fnglish country houses the hot), of high b'a is considered the pleasanft est one in tlie day, eswcially during th hunting season. Formality Is cast aside. The men come in from the field with appetites shariiened by n long gal lop In the fresh air. The women a in Kar In their prettiest tea. gowns, 1li conversation is usually Interesting and Hplrited, and everything tends to mak the participants linger long around th table. The meal partakes of the na ture of breakfast, luncheon nhd dinner without. lK'lng too nearly like any ol them. Tea, of course, is served, nnd li made at the table by the hostess, Itolnj kept warm under n dainty cosy. Claret and even beer, are allowable for tlx tired nnd thirsty siMuismen, thong! the latter is randy asked for. The tablt Is well furnished with substnntlnl eab nbles for tho men and with dainties foi the women. , Tobacco Consumption in Austria. Austria, with a total iopulation ol nlsuit 4H.500,(XK1, consumed tn IHOfl 1 S44,0O0,iHi0 cigars and 1,005,000,(101 cigarettes, which Is about ttiirty-elghi cigars nnd forty-right cigarettes to er ery man, woman and child in FurojH per year. Since tiie manufacture ol cigars, cigarettes r.:i;l tobacco Is a moil ojioly of the Austrian government tin entire income of th!?t Industry reverti to public use!. The total reee.lphi foi the year amounted to more than 08, 000,000 florins (37,000,000). Moat people not only grow older tr ery day, but poorer. f I" is; I- !', V- . sS ' I i I f Hi, , mm i i I -i i i i' II 111 i 'I " ""'' " I - i I i i --I i i i 1
