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About The Sioux County journal. (Harrison, Nebraska) 1888-1899 | View Entire Issue (April 8, 1897)
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BANKS ARE SQUEEZED.
THEY SUFFER FROM THE LOW
ERINQ OF VALUES.
Baaka Maat Share the Loaea Which
the Currency Policy They feapparted
Ilaa Brought to the Bnlnrn of the
Coaatrj-Onlj the I'aurer Proflta,
Effect of the Gold Standard.
The recent sealing of tin- capital mock
of the Prewtou National Bank of thin
city, n-jy tbe Detroit Bvening NVws,
from f l.uoo.Odll down t'j $7yo,OUJ, fur
nishes a valuable olJevt lesson lu the
effect of the gold fftauibird upon proier
ty values. A few 7t!K ago. when tbe
bank was organized and capitalised at
fl.OUO.WW, thai Jgnre honestly repre
touted It valu. Its shares sold at
jar. or very ni'arl; liar, and that was
the Ixtit evidei.ee of it value. It did a
large businct fnd its affair were
managed wl'h ,s much discretion and
ability a othe kinks. lis losses were
tin greater thui Inevitably fall to the
lot of ordinarily well managed banks.
There Is a wide-spread Impression
among H c.Ttaln class of people that
banking i the one das of enterprise
which enjoys Immunity from the ordi
nary "in'-crtaiiitics of business, and
that, given fair management and hon
esty on the part of the dint-tors, there
niiwt he a continuous profit lu it con
duct, whether times are good or bad.
Tie? truth, however. is that the lmnkn
are a sensitive. If not more no, to the
depressing Influences of hard times as
amy commercial or Industrial enter
prises wbatsis'Ver. Tbey are the larg
est holders of property of all kinds
in tjie country, although they are nom
inally not lis owners. Their own cap
ital is but a small percentage of the
inoey which they loan. The great
bills' of their loans Is the money of their
depositors. As security for this they
receive bonds, stocks and mortgages,
cohering Industrial iilants and lands,
ani lu this way more actual property
lei It) their hands than can be found
at times unincumbered' lu the hands
of its nominal owners.
When from any cause these proper
ties depreclif.e lu value, the banker's
first duty to his depositors, which Is his
Hint duty lu law and morals. Is to see
tint the depreciation does not endanger
the safety of the funds of which he Is
the trustee, lint depreciation during
the last fw years, due to the rapid ap
preciation of the medium In which val
ue are measured, was too enormous
and too quick for the most prudent of
bankers. It swept along the whole line,
fl'id securities thai were supposed to
cover twice and three times the money
loaned upon them were found to be un
salable at the face of the money ad
vanced. Few have any adequate con
ception of the embarrassment which
this enormous scaling down of the value
of their securities has brought to tlx:
managers of the bunks. In many cases
the depreciation has been so great that
securities for (he legitimate purMises
.if banking have become actually wort h
less l hat is to nay. they were not sal
able at all.
The numerous bank failure which
fallowed the election of .Mr. McKlnley
throughout the West were merely
symptoms of a general condition which
may not yet have reached Its worst
We have not waited until this late
ly to warn the bankers of this coun
try that they must ultimately share
tbe losses which the currency policy
they supported had brought to the In
dustry anil commerce of the country.
Again and again throughout the late
campaign the Kvenlng News predicted
that the gold standard would ultimate
ly reach the banks in Its ruinous Influ
ence. Their Interests, properly under-
stood, are precisely tbe same as those
of the farmer, the mechanic, the manu
facturer and the merchant. All have
Buffered alike, or will yet suffer, if
they have been so fortunate as to es
cape thus far.
How different would It have been
had tbe" country never left the double
standard, or, having left It, had re
turned to it year ago. The greatly
Increased production of the precious
metals with which the world had been
bl eased would have kept the supply of
basic money approximately up to the
demands of the increasing necessities
of mankind, and the prices of property
and product thus unstained would
have furnished a continuous incentive
in profit to the exertion of human In
dustry. Values would have been kept
up, the debtor would have found a mar
ket for his holdings and have been
able to pay his debts, ami the bunks
to-day would have bad a solid founda
tion lu their securities for both their de
positors and their capital.
It Is true, the purchasing power of
money would not have been so great as
It is, and the absolutely secured cred
itor would not get so much property
for his claim as he now can, but Is not
this Just what alls the banks as well
as everybody elsenamely, that the
claim of the creditor eats up too much
of the property of the debtor nnd while
ruining the latter nets a loss also to
the former? The private usurious
lender of money, who actually contem
plates at the time of making the loan
the diwlrable possibility of seizing (be
collateral at a reduced price and makes
all his arrangement to render the
transaction prolltable, may find Interest
In this process, but the average bank
cannot do so. It Is not organized to
hold properties of all sorts or to man
age them when seized.
'.'a highest Interest, therefore, lies, as
do the Interests of Its depositors and
Us debtors, In tbe Integrity If not the
enhancement of the pronertlns It takes
as collateral. In ft word, the banker
It ft debtor Yen mors than be Is a cred
itor. If the bankers of this country
were ealy UxeUbjest nasi far sighted
tMsMtk to Wtdewtaad into simple faot
they weald net bare been almost naan-
imously shrieking for t lie gold standard
last fall, but would have Iwa lu jje
forefront of the line In the battle fur
the double standard.
A r-tlver I'roblem.
11 appears that when Congress de
monetised silver there was nobody ou
baud to remind it that the L'uiu-d
Stat owed a certain indebtedness,
payalde expressly in tiilver coin, and
that fact only came out Incidentally in
the Senate in a recent debate. The
government ltought laud of tbe Potta
watomie Indians ami has been pay
ing them for list years past an annuity
which, it is stipulated, should be hand
ed over to them in American silver dol
lars. The Indian appropriat on bill pr
vldes for this payment for the coming
flscalt year ajid was questioned ilisiu
On the one baud. It was asked wheth
er It was propT for our great and pow
erful government to impose upon "Lo,
tbe poor Indian" dollars which, accord
ing to some Senators, are not worth 50
cents apiece whether it was not an
advantage taken of their weakness and
a frauil perpetrated niton their Ignor
ance. On the other side. It was said,
by Hon. Mr. Piatt, Hepultlican Sena
tor from the Nutmeg State, that "the
silver dollars of thU country" are just
as good as gold, an important admis
sion, which, if made before the first
Twwlay of last November, would have
prolwibly cost Senator Piatt his Sena
torial position and branded him forever
as an anarchist.
And then another Senator Inquired
of Mr. Piatt why other public credit
ors than Indians for Instance, the na
tional banks holding Government securities-were
uot also paid in silver
Instead of gold. To which Mr. Piatt,
having made one damaging admission,
declined to miike further reply, and thu
Silver may be good enough for In
dians, but national bankers want gold.
A Had Showing.
The tables presented by the director
of the mint how that the per capita
circulation in the 1'nlted States has
Increased in twenty-four years from
$'.'l.:;ti to f'JI.a'S; the circulation of the
Pulled Kingdom from S'.Mhi to ''l.so;
the circulation of Germany from $i:i.5!i
to $ l'.t.'JS; the circulation of Belgium
from 1 1.11 loS-Mil; the circulation of
the Netherlands from f Hi.."nS to S'JI.OH,
and the circulation of Italy from $i.SS
It would be an easy matter to show
that the per capita circulation lu the
t'nited Suites (trior to the collapse of
1S73 was more than twice the amount
given by the director of the mint for
is?:). Hut we take the figures as they
stand. We take the figures represent
ing a year In which the boarding of
money and the destruction of values
was almost as ruinous as these ele
ments have been during the past four
years. It will be wen that the gain
in the per capita, circulation of the
1 nited Stales as compared with the
year in which business was at its low
est ebb has been only $-'.U7 a gain
of only $2.07 lu a country where the
possibilities of enterprise and Industry
have but begun to present themselves!
It Is a curious and significant fact
that, so far as the Increase lu circula
tion Is concerned that most potent fac
tor In business and enterprise the
I'nlted Stales has lagged Itehlnd all
the Kiiropean countries. Even In the
Netherlands the gain has been three
tlmK as much as in the United States.
In Belgium the Increase has been near
ly seven times greater than in the
Pulled States: In the United Kingdom
It has been five times as much.
Trnata Kent Kaay.
The French have a saying that If
you scratch a Bussian you uncover a
Tartar. It Is a singular fact that you
cannot scratch a goldbug or a mug
wump but you find underneath the skin
a monopolist, an upholder of trusts or
a participator lu stolen franchises. The
members of a sound money convention
such as sut in this city the other day
always have the two objects In view
to prollt by legislation ami by otliclal
favor and to defeat the Democratic
The money contributors to the He
publlcan organization, of whose liber
ality old Thurlow Weed used to boast
andtheHantiasof to-day have had prac
tical proof, are to bo found connected
ami identified with sugar trusts, cof
fee trusts, rubber trusts, coal trusts
Hnd all the long array of trusts which
overshadow this community. It Is folly
to think the Republican party directors
will allow them to be damnified In their
money making. New Vurk News.
No person has a natural right, to In
jure any other person, ami no just gov
ernment ought to enable or permit any
person to Injure another. All should
stand equal before the law. That Is
the great principle that underlies gov
ernment. Yet it Is not rare to find that a man
who pays $5 In taxe ought to pay $10,
while the man who pays $10 lu taxes
very often should pay only $3. Unjust
taxation means robbery by law means
more dangerous than any highwayman
would list! and the man who aids In
passing a law making such an unfair
condition of things possible lacks the
courage of the highwayman.
You take from those who are assess
ed too much and give to those who are
assessed too little. William J. Bryan.
The ftllvcr Hepnbticana.
The Sliver Republicans antagonize no
other body of bimetallism. They sim
ply form themselves Into a column
which Is to co-operate with the other
great political forces bent upon the
same object namely, the Democratic
party and the People'a party. Cincin
nati Enquirer. '
Fee Ike Peestla M CoaaMee.
Tbe people of these United Itatea
may well ask themselves what they
bare amlned or elecUo a Reptibllcaa.
Tfeey tad It ainesjnaeO tht a cabinet
has been formed In which erery lnte j
est that fattens on tbe Government Is '
represented and that scarcely a single
member of It is not Indebted to lieputt
liean party legislation for a very large
part or the whole of a great private
tUtuation Is Orave,
It Is a singular fact that tbe election
of Mr. McKlnley ba not even restored '
confidence among tbe multimillionaires '
and monev owners of New York City. I
We aay tbe fact Is singular because
this class placed all their Influence at
the disposal of the Ilcpublieaus and did
everything lu their power to promote
Mr. McKinley's election. They suc
ceeded In their efforts. They have had
the fulfillment of what seemed their
heart's desire, and still they view the
situation with the gravest doubt and
I'onoliat I'c.ln ter-i.
Every trust Is a menace to good gov
ernment. Public opinion is the greatest foe
Paternalism Is a thousand times bet
ter than favoritism.
Government banks will regulate the
volume and give us a stable curren
cy. It is not over-production, but a false
system of distribution that causes pov
erty. Keep it before the people that the
Republicans promised to deliver pros
perity. Tbe government part of our Govern
ment is socialism when It la uot fa
voritism. The mission of the People's party Is
hardly begun. The work of education
must go on.
No amount of wealth can ever stand
before a revolution. It Is weakness In
stead of strength.
Resolutions of symtathy for the poor
is worse than soup, atxl soup is a
mighty light diet.
The spirit of liberty and indeitend
euce can be crushed and smothered,
but it can u killed.
If fusion c had any respectability
some of the place hunters have smirch
ed it with disgrace.
The real question Is whether the Gov
ernment or the banks shall Issue the
paper money of the country.
The "cross of gold" Is yet standing,
while the "crown of thorns" Is being
pressed down on labor's brow.
The Republicans are kept busy ex
plaining why prosperity doesn't come,
and when It may be looked for.
Changing men will do no good un
less we also change the system. The
Republican party will bring no better
Tbe first half of the nineteenth cen
tury will mark the demonetization of
all metallic currency except for sub
When one trust begins to compete
with another It gets out an Injunction
and puts a stop to It Isn't this a dandy
AH the gold produced In the world
lu one year would not pay the interest
on the world's debts three months.
Then, how arc we expected to pay the
We can't get fair railroad rates until
th" water Is squeezed out of tbe sdtck.
Te b.'.it way to do this is for the (lov
er, tin en: to acquire ownership and op
The gold reserve seems to be reserv
ing nil right, but It rttcsn't bring pros
perity, and now the question occurs,
What connection has the gold reserve
If the Government can't keep gold
to redeem Its paper, how do the banks
expect to do so? The Government Is
much ulronger than the banks and Its
credit better than that of all the banks
After all. the problem In the last
stages of Its analysis Is, whether man
hood or money shall rule In this coun
try. All other Issues center around
. this one. It is thu same old question
of human rights.
Ills Grip Labels.
The coming tnan, of course, cuts no
Ice with the new woman; but then he
Is up to all sorts of doviisti to be sti-ii-t-ly
"In it." A ruddy coiirpk'Xloued, e!f-con-lous
young man lugged a leather
bag Into a down-town (!th avenue ele
vated tnaln to-day, and, placing It In
front of him, where It might lie easily
seen by other isisHcngera in the car, he
scIiIihI down behln i Iris jmpor to owail.
the effect. The bag wa completely
covered wlr.h foreign, Uiltels of hole's
and express companies, and If the
young man had accoiniulsl It to
every place indicated by the laltel he
must have bis-n a glolie trotter of no
ordinary experience. lmdoti, Pari,
Cairo, iitid even Jnimnese cities were
aepresentcd by label. The other jnis
neiigers turned MiiMr atten-tion to thiH
Wrhcr ltag at one'. Two elderly wom
en acrotts the aisle from the young man
dcclphere-d the labels on by one, and
then nudged each other, after eauh ef
fort and repented the name of the
Vlace Indicated. The ruddy young mnu
g-laneed out from boh 1ml his iiewiaicr
frequently to notb-e what Impression
bo was creating. Hie self-satisfied look
lasted until a young woman In one of
tbe cross scata said to hor companion,
In a high, pitched voice:
"Yys, I had my trunk done over wltth
foreign hibtU liefore going to the coun
try, by Joim, down on Oth avenue. He
put on aotne lovely btltole Paris and
lyondon and all. He dmrged 25 cents a
Label. They got me Into a mess of trou
ble, though. I tried to talk about tbeoe
places and t didnt know anything
about them. I sensped them all off
before I bad been there a week."
The passengers began to smile, and
at (be nest tattoo tM raddgr man and
his baf toft the train. New York cor
respondence IMMOjajf pteavtaa,
fifty years of age.
What Iowa Haa Achieved in the Way
Iowa came into tbe Union as the
twenty-ninth State ou Dec. 'JH, 1M0,
with a population of HX1MHH. Eight
years lief ore tlds event the ti t steamer
bad crossed the ocean; one year before
the electric telegraph had Isirne its first
message between Paltimore and Wash
ington; railways bad Ufa in o-ration
In Amerii-a but eighteen years; gold
had not lieen diwovered In California;
the iuveiilorof tbe steam railway died
ten years after Iowa bail joined the xis
terhissl of States; jtostage oil a letter
ls'tween New York and Boston was
JW'i cents; envelopes had not lteen in
vented; postage stamps had lteen in use
one year; there were no omnibuses nor
Htreet railways; Abraham Lincoln hid
just lteen elected to Congress; Douglas
had JtiKt entered the Senate; tbe Mexi
can war wtis in progress; there were
less than ."sumo white men lte! ween the
western border of Iowa and the Pa
cilic Ocean; there were yet living thou
sands of brave men who fought under
Washington for American indepen
dence; Webster bad not made bis 7th
of March speech ami was yet a leader
In American politics: the great anti
slavery paper which published "Un-le
Tom's Cabin" bail just Ist-n establish
ed in Washington; In all America tle'ie
were but "J,S(io iiewpHK.-rs, being only
throe times as many as we have in
Iowa at (lie present time; the fastest
book printing press would turn out 1,
000 copies of an eight-page form per
hour; I.ndy Suffolk, time J:;!0. was 1 lie
fastest trotter In the world; the great
republic of twenty-eight State was in
transition between experiment and
While Iowa Is a great Slate in ter
ritory, there are larger ones. We are
not proud of our ize, but our quality.
Our urea Is .Vi.OOti square miles, or
In IKC, we planted 8,r. M i. t acres of
coin. The Iowa plow Isiy goes forth
in tbe morning to work in a nrn field
larger than the Stales of Maryland and
I tela wan1; the annual money value of
bis labors is .fiMi.l.'lHi.imo, or much more
than the product of the silver mines of
America. We planted in a recent year
nearly -l.oi'fi.'MNi acres of oats, yielding
In money value SlTi.ikki.ikio.
In coin and oats Iowa Is the first
Slate. In the same year we produced
hay to the value of .SIi.iiou.ooo. being
the second Stale in the Union ns to hay.
our rank a.s to potatoes is fifth. In
wheat we are fourteenth. In hogs, of
course, for ycais we have been first. In
cat tie sis olld.
Our grain products for 1H!I.1 yielded In
cash i?l';s.'';;."i.-li;', a sum large enough
to pay every mortgage on every Iowa
farm, with !i i.( ii m i.oiio to span'. Our
cattle in N'..- were worth -$."t.'!..S20.1!)7;
i our hogs. $..1!m;.!MKJ; sheep. IJiJO.-Viri;
chickens. $1,1:1,1104: turkeys. $71.'!,72S;
hows, !f)l.ri;4..-.lii. Add to these the
miscellaneous products, nucli ns honey,
sorghum, flax, buckwheat, etc., and we
I have the total value of Iowa agrienl-
I tunil products for one year reaching the
enormous amount of $ 100,000,000. The
gross product of Iowa agriculture in
I les than seven years would pay the
j United States debt ns it was at the
, close of the civil war.
I Our people produced butter to the
value of $ir.,7L'7,2l In IX! )4 and cheese
to the value of .flOM.K)!).
There were produced in Iowa In l.H!4
, over OHiO.ooo of dozen of eggs and
there were marketed over 30,000,000 of
dozens, wielding over $4,000,000 in
cash. Di'S Moines Capital.
His Itest Advioe.
It Is told of an Indiana judge that
shortly after his admins-ion to the liar
many years ago he was loitering ultout
a county court house when a presiding
judge suddenly summoned him to up
pear lu court, and appointed him coun
sel for a prisoner alstut to be tried for
stealing a horse.
"But, your honor," lie demurred, "this
Is a charge which may result in sending
ttie prisoner to the penitentiary if the
case gin against him, and I do not
like to undertake the p'sponsibilily of
"Nonsense," exclaimed the court, "tin
case Is not at, nil "complicated, and I am
sure vou will handle It in a manner
which will conserve all your client's in
1 "I have had no chance, your honor,
to neiiunliit myself with the facts lu
this case, and if the trial muni proceed
at once I must beg to decline to repre
sent the defendant, insisted the young
"Your duty lu the premises is. clear,
continued the court. "I will allow you
unlllcieiit time to consult, with your
client and map out your line of defense.
You may retire with the prisoner Into
my private nlom for consultation. Thir
ty minutes will give yon ample time.
Go Into flint room: have the prisoner
state his cae fully to you; Imagine
yourself in his place, and advise him to
do Just what you yourself would do
under such circumstances."
"And If I do this will the court hold
me blameless for whatever tuny re
sult?" asked the attorney.
I "Certainly, sir," replied the Judge,
I The lawyer and bis client retired for
conn-.ltatlon. At the end of thirty mill
lib the former came out of the private
room and said: "Your honor, we are
1 now ready to proceed."
I "Where Is your client?" Inquired the
I "I do not know, may the court
please," replied the counsel.
A bailiff ran Into the consultation
room. A window twelve feet from The
ground was open, and there were two
hcclmarka In the soft earth outside.
Blown Away In a Boa Oar.
"Awful experience 7 Yes," eald the
tramp as he eat at a Holland street
kitchen table on Thursday morning and
cut Into theejeond piece of costard pie.
"I Vae aleetMo soundly In ft box car
out la low one nlf ht laaf summer, and
the wind was blowing like tbundr
across the plains. Suddenly that car
got looe the brakes broke or suthin'
ami It liegan to crawl along out of the
siding and onto tbe main track. It was
nuts for me. I thought the wind
wouldn't blow me far and so I kept on.
I stood in the distr and saw the houses
and fence go by faster and faster, till ,
all of a sudden I realized tluit 1 was 1
going too fast to get off. and no way ,
of stopping it. Half An hour after we
the car and I dashed through a little ,
station and I had just time to see the 1
telegraph operator run out and look !
after us and then run back to telegraph j
down the line to clpar the track. We
were going more than a mile a minute
and my hair was standing on end. For
ty miles down the liue we went through
another station, and on a siding I
caught sight of a man with a rope on
the cowcatcher. That engine chased us
twenty miles down the track. The mn
with the roue threw it around the
brake wheel on top of our car and grad-
ually stopped it, while all the time the
wind was blowing a gale. We had jtiKt
got headed back toward the depot when
an express train showed up where we
should have met it kerchunk that's
good pie," and he took another piece.
The Yon Bnlow letters will shortly
be published in London.
The title of tbe new novel written b.v
Conn 11 Doyle for serial publication in
the London Qui-en is "Uncle Bernac: A
Memory of the Empire."
The Bodley Head issues "In the Dor
ian Mood." by Victor Plan-, a book of
verse which does not Justify its tithj
and hardly its publication. It amuses
little and Instructs not at nil,
Lotii.se Imogen Guiney ha.s in press a
volume of short essays of a whimsical
and desultory character to winch she
gives I lie gypsy name, "Pa Iritis." A
patrin. Miss Guiney says, is a gypsy
trail made uby easting handful of
leaves ou the road to show which Way
they have taken.
Tlie Bookman expresses u desire to
have Henry T. Finek write a paper on
"The Probable Knowledge of tjuater
nions Among the Pre-Cont'ueian t'hi
nose," the motive being to sis? "whether
he would be able to get beyond the first
page without bringing lu the beloved
name of Herr Anton Scull."
In "Eehoiw from the Mountain," ('.
E. D. Phelps touches now the lyric
chord of Greece, now the modern lyre
of society verse. Both are wholesome
and tlie latter especially welcome. Mr.
Phelps is not or the number of those
versitiers who have apparently been
trying to convince the public tluit tlie
sense of fun is dead in the world.
Prof. William M. Sloiine is now In
Kurope arranging for tlie simnlta ncoius
publication in French and German of
his "Life of Napoleon lb inn parte." The
Bookman, commenting 011 his change
from Princeton to Columbia, says: "It
is no secret that on the death of Dr.
McCosh Prof. Slonne would have suc
ceeded him in the presidency of Prince
ton had not the traditions of that insti
tution required the incumbent of the
office to be a clergyman of the Presby
A Very Keiiiarknble Idea.
Slie was angry, uot to say disgusted.
"That's the third time this month,"
she said, "that I have read a story
about a woman going through her hus
band's pockets for change."
"Well, my dear," re returned, aitolo
getically, "you mustn't blame me. I
didn't write them."
"Of course you didn't." si xclaimed.
"You know better. It's preposterous,
outrageous, that such libels should be
allowed to circulate In the guise of hu
mor. It would be just as truthful to
talk alHiut a man going through his
wife's pockets. Why don't they ever
He shttok his head.
"I can't say positively," he .said. "but.
it Is just possible that some humorist
once tried to fhnl one, and knows how
it is.' One may joke about the improba
ble, you know, when he feels that he
ought to draw the line at tlie Impossi.
hie." Chicago Post.
Personated the tucen.
There in an old lady lying in the
Pennsylvania hospital at Philadelphia
with a broken leg who once Hat, as the
figure of a life-size painting of Queen
Victoria. She Is Miss Blanche Sully,
and her father was Thomas Sully, in
his time a famous painter of portraits.
In 1S;;7 he went to Kng'.and with a com
mission from the St. George Koclet?
to paint the portrait of young Queen
Victoria, lie took his daughter with
him, mid as she was very nearly of the
same stature as the Queen she sat for
the figure in her fa tiler's picture of Vic
toria, thus saving the latter the annoy
ance of long sittings. ' During the sit
tings Miss Sully became quite intimate
with her Majesty, and brought buck
with her Jo this country many delight
fill memoirs of her royal friend.
e(.rry What do you think of this
Idea that a man's real character Is re
vealed In his handwriting?
Wallace 1 don't believe It. Of course
a man's character Is not revealed by
his handwriting. I have heard love
letter read in court the authors of
which J knew were not the asses that
the. letters made them out to be. Cin
Whj They Are In Boclet .
The Bitting Lady (frankly) I go Into
society to find a husband. Why do
The Standing Lady To get away
from a snsband.Ttibae.
QUESTION IN MATHEMATICS.
How One Yoaog Man Puzzled a Lot of
Sii of them, three young ladles and
1 three young men, were Hitting in a
I semi-circle liefore the fireplace trying
to- keeji warm and trying u flai some
thing interesting to talk altouL They
had discussed the last dance and the
next one till there was nothing left In
those KiihjcHK to talk alsnit. They had
even discussed the weather, and the
conversation had begun to lag a trifle
when one of the young men came for
ward with this suggestion:
"Let's nee how good some of us are
"Oh, we're nil good," shouted the oth
ers lu chorus. ".lust try us and see If
"All right," said the first young man.
"Let's see bow many of you can an
swer this proposition: Suppose a rail
road train left New York every day at
for San Francisco and another
train left San Frmirtsco every day for
j New York, the trains traveling over the
I name road, of course, and the trip each
1 way taking seven days: how many
::ains would the train from New York
I meet on the way?"
i "Oil, there's some catch ultout. it,"
I said one of the young ladies, "I'm not
I going to bite at anything like that."
I "No. there's no catch about it at all,"
j replied the young man. ''It's a tit might
I mathematical problem. All you have to
1 do is to think It over."
I "Why. of course there's no catch
nlMiiit it," spoke up another of the
voung men. "The train from New York
would meet seven east-lMiund trains on
"No. that isn't right," said the young
man who had furnished the problem.
"It is. too," declared the other. "Of
course it's right. If the train that
leaves New York lakes seven days to
make the Journey, and a train leaves
San Francisco every day at the same
hour, of course the New York train
will meet seven east-bound trains."
j "No. old man. I tell you your answer
j Is not right." declared the propounder
of the proposition.
"Oh. I've got it," said one of the
young ladies. "As the trains are coming
toward one another all the while, the
New York train would meet only half
as many as it would if the other trains
stood still. Therefore, don't you see,
the New York train would meet, just
three and a half trains from San Fran
cisco." All the others wanted to laugh at this
answer, but they did not dare because
none of them wtis ready with a better.
"That Isn't It, either," said the pro
pounder of the question, biting his lips
to keep from laughing. "You haven't
figured it out yet."
"I've guessed, I guess." suddenly de
clared one of the young ladies who had
not spoken liefore. "There is a train
that gets into the New York depot just
as tlie one leaves there, and yon don't
count that, of course. So there are six
trains. Isn't that right?"
"No: even that isn't right," declared
the young man.
'Well, how many are there?" de
mauded the others, in chorus. ,
"Do you all give it up?"
"Yes. we all give it: up."
"Well, tlie New York train going to
San Francisco would meet fourteen
trains coining east."
"Fourteen!" slum ted the others.
"How do you make it fourteen?"
"Easily enough," explained the young
man. "Counting the train that comes
Into the station just as our train leaves,
there are seven trains on the road when
our train starts. Seven more will start
before It reaches San Francisco, and
seven and seven are fourteen. Hasy
enough, when you know how, isn't it?"
I He Didn't, Mind.
i Andrew Lang, in the Illustrated l.oii
j don News, gives an anecdote of Dean
j Stanley's amiable simplicity. Tbe
Dean was invited out to dinner, and
was very late. When he arrived his
collar was unfastened, and the ends
vibrated like little white wings about
the head of a cherub. I
People could not but look at him with
curiosity during dinner, and at length,
I with due precautions, his hostess ven
i lured to ask him if lie knew that bin
collar had broken adrift.
"Oil, yi"S," said tlie Dean. "Do you
"Not at all," said the lady.
"Then I don't mind, either," an
swered tlie Dean. "The bill ton dropped
off while I was dressing," and he con
tinued his conversation.
"It was not," says Mr. Lang, "ab
sence of mind, but unrivaled presence
of mind that Stanley displayed on this
occasion. Any other human being than
he would have been at the jHtiu: of
changing his shirt."
Quick It el urns.
Angry Caller (at newspaper office)
Say, I want that little nd. I gave you
two days iigo"Wiuited, an electric
battery iu good working order" taken
Advertising Clerk -What Is the mat
ter? Didn't we put It In the right col-
Angry Caller Column bo dashed!
The ad. overdid the bitslness. My
bouse was struck by lightning hist
W hut a Question.
His New Manima-iu-Iiaw 1 trust,
my de.ii 1- son. that you never Indulge
in the pernicious habit of going out
between the acts for 11 drink of iutoxr
cantg? The Bridegroom Why, my dear
mamma, you didn't think 1 had It
brought iu, did you ? Cleveland Tlaln
The public takes care of many people
who are not In the poor house.
Tbe old settler remembers well b
there was little to remember. ;
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