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About The Sioux County journal. (Harrison, Nebraska) 1888-1899 | View Entire Issue (April 1, 1897)
MAN'S FAITHFUL FRIEND. Bobby loved me Biibhy'a dead Vli. shall say " heaven hclda bim T Who Khali dure deny thai Ood'a All-embracing love enfolds Liip? While th memory of true lore Mortal "till delight to cherish. Who shall uy that u h a fowl. Faithful b-ait fc hia ahull pcrihb? Who shall aay uo nl looked out From I bow eye that f'iT a,-iu-d nuking Me to recognise aomcwhat More than tloh mid blood's mere tiiask- Dear dumb Hobby, tried and true! Faithful friend ai.d utamb defender! Heaven witc nearer to u were all lluuiau heart, aa true and tender. Many a mighty or. of earth Might have gone mid iicarce bare moved tne; lie was but a dog and yet Bobby' dead and Hubby loved me! Boston I'ost. MR. BOFFIN AND THE lUIUFFS. "Well! Of all the croolest thliiK a ever wos!" ejaculated Mr. Boffin, the butler. "It's r wicked gimme, that's wot It Is, Mr. Boffin," chimed In Mrs. Asprey, the housekeeper. "Couldn't have b'lieved It of the guv'uor. Never, till this inlnnlt, know'd lilm to do anything but wot was pufHck- ly genteel." "Ah. Mr. Boffin! One don't know where to mint!" "If he'd a told me I wouldn't have taken it so erool. Hut to let us In for the bailiffs like this, without a word of warning, find him a kicking up 'In Vela on a 'ollday! Well. If a dirtier trick than 1 know 'uiv to express. Mm. As prey. And me a served hlin faithful, too, for twenty yearn!" "1 'ope that when you're writing to him. Mo-HoMn. you'll put it to him quite straight.'.' "You may trust me, mem. I shall lie pufnckly candid. Oh, yes! He'll fidget In Ills chair when he read my letter to morrow. If the postliortice wouldn't lie shut before a messenger could get there I'd send him n wire, lint as It la there' no chance of bin getilng back 'ere till termorrow night." "If he comes at all, Mr Boffin." "Oh, I think he'll come. mem. He'll 'ave the proper feeling to come w hen be gets my letter, Mrs. Asprey." "Don't you count UMn bis proper feel ing, Mr. Hoflln? If he'd have had much proper feeling he'd never have served hi llilo ii'iutv frli'Lr llnrpo vvtocr ttftilt .' ...!. . undred from a Jew. I never! And him always pretended to lie rollln' lu money. Well! He don't owe us much wages, that's one comfort." "No, mom! He've always paid our wages to the day. That we must al low." "Just his ai-trulnc, Mr. Boffin. A cheap way of keeping up his en-dit while he was running Into debt. I can see through it now." "And only last wi-ek, ineni-lf you'll believe me -1 brought him In a wine i Mil for seventy-odd iounds. anil he net- j tied it as easy ami casual as a lord." "Ah, Mr. itollin! Hraz-eiiliig It out to i the hint." I "If anyone," mud the butler, oracu larly, "had told me an hour ago that the guv'nor wosn't ns wife us the Hank of England I'd have said to that man. 'You're a liar and ye.u knows It.' Anil now to have the lmilifff. In!" Ah Mr. Hotlln spoke a footman topped his bend Into the housekeeper's room, where the ulsive dialogue was taking place. "IH-g pard'n, Mr. Hollln, sir; but one of them gents Is arsking for yer." "Thank you, William; you may tell the feller that I'll attend to lilm at my leesure," said Mr. Hollln. with extreme dignity. "Very good, Mr. Hoflln, sir." And William departed with the mii sage. "To think of your Ising bordered fllmtit and 'ectored over by those low chaps!" exclaimed the housekeeper, with sympathetic indignation. "Beggln' your pardon, .Mrs. Asprey, but I'm not being bordered alsiut, nor yet 'cetored over, mem." (Mr. Hoflln drew up bis short obese person to It full height.) "And I sent 'em that ines sago on purpose to let 'em see It. Hut 1 am going to see what their next move Is. not liecos' they borders me-for I knows lietter than to take borders from Kit'-h vermin hut beet' I'm the guv' nor's representative; and, shabby as he has be'aved to me after twenty years' service, I still considers myself the trustee, ho to speak, of his hluterests and his property." With this speech, delivered In his nitwit Impressive manner, Mr. Hoftlu quitted the housekeeper and went to Join the sheriff' officers In the large front hall. There were two of them. The one, a square-built, liow-Icgged, uuwlKJlinotne faced man, scedlly drcttscd and of vul gar uspect; the other, a far smarter, more pleasant-looking and more pne Mcnlahlc individual, who might eimlly ha vii passed for a well-to-do clerk or collei-tor. From the first he had taken the lead - Indeed, the low-legg1 man bad wurccly opened his mouth ml wan evidently the ui aud pokeiiian of the pair. "Horry to trouble you," he raid to Mr. ' Hoftlu. quite civilly, "but before I go. ond leave my man here In noaaMlon, I hall have to take an ln?entory of your master's effects, and I tboujrht that you might like to go round with me while I do so." "Certainly, I hall wkh to kep my heye on you, young man." retorted th butler, with dttunt frigidity. "Tea. Of courae. Quite o," remark ed the other, irvhearly, m ke produced a notebook fwm tiki poefcet. "Now Wt Bay u wotttogl fcwt wi riniihr' i writlngi "Front hall -Turkey farpet. K tame, lour nav rnmm eiclcKiasti-al iwtterij. fancy hatraik, raw stuffed plieaants. onk tand for Kline," ;.., until he had Jotted down all the hall furniture In his notelsHik. 'Well, where next? Iiiniiig-rooni eh? Very good. I'mph! Turkey or- I-t No. 2. Two four six eight ten twelve ('hipi-endale chairs n-d nio rc: large mahogany table, antique sidelsiard -splendid pie-e, tm; ten large portraits In oils ancestors, I pre sume. Ah! Hue painting t hat over the nldehywrd- a Komiiey'? Thought mo! Beautiful! liea u tiful!" 'Thank you, young man. It's really very kind of you to commend It most condewemling, as I may say, re marked Mr. Boffin, the butler, with sar casm. Kh? What'"'! laughed the annota- tor, good-teinperedly. "Come, my dear elr, don't look so glum. You may a well put a cheerful face on It. It can't lie helped, you know." When I want your advice In regard to my personal apiiearam-e I shall prob ably arwk you for It, young man." re- toned Mr. Hotlln In a withering tone. "All right. All right. It's no ne get ting shirty, my good fellow." "And requeuing you will not again apply that vulgar aud lieastly term to me, young man," gasped Mr. Hoflln. "No offense no offense," said the ortber. Indifferently, aa he continued to look about him and scribble In his note- IxKik. "Let nie see. That's all here. Where now? Drawing-room. Ah! yes. Aunlster carpet, etc." And In an Instant he was busy Jot ting down the contents of this apart ment, also, Mr. Hotfln looking on with a crushing and a stony store, and the bow-legged Individual whistling or rather huudng-fragments of popular tunes through bis set teeth. They next went to the library. Here wa a very line collection of well -bound lssiks -numbering some 2.0il or 3,kxi volumes. The man with the notcliook moved slowly round -Insiiecting the shelves. "Ha!" he said, as he scribbled awn.v rapidly, "1 see your guv'nor'n a bibli ophile. He has some splendid old liooks here. I know collectors who would give their weight In gold for one or two of these." "I'll tell my master wlwit you say." ob served Mr. Hollln. haughtily. "I am mire he will U gratified by your remm inendatlons, young man." '.'Ah, well, lu spite of your sarcasms.' gald the other, not In the least put out or almshed, "I do happen to know good deal nliout articles of virtu, and there are many good Judges who set store by my opinion, I can tell you." "Ho! Indeed, young man?'' was Mr LBoflin's comment K ... . And now," wild be of the notebook u soon as the Inventory of the library a rather lengthy proceeding -was com idete. "We had better finish off the rent of the ground floor before going up titalrs. Will you show the way?" "Very well, young man. But I do this name under protest, and that's the can did fuck." The Inventory of the kitchen, pantries and other servants' oflli-es was soon completed. That of the cellar was a longer process. Some of the wines were of line brand and of great age anil value, and the aniiotator was careful to Jot these down accurately. They then went nitalrs and worked off the bed rooms- followed by the Inquisitive eyes of Hannah, the head housemaid, to wIhiiii the charai-ter of the visitors had not been communicated and who was very curious to burn what was in the wind. Nor iliould this have been dif ficult, for although the annotator him self was of no distinctive cut, the air, appearance and manner of his under ling simply gave him away. A more typical bailiff never trod In shoe leather. When the Inventory was at length fin ished It was nearly 9 "o'clock. The young mull shut up his notebook with n snap find thrust It Into his breast pocket, lie then said to Mr. Itollin, civilly and Indeed throughout lie had evidently tried to discharge bis unpleas ant duty with as little offense as possi ble: "1 mut be off now. Of course. I shall have to leave my man here In imsses slon Very sorry. Hut It Is what I am forced to do. Jusi a word In private." drawing Mr. Boffin aside. "Make him comfortable and treat him decently and you'll find lilm a most civil and obliging fellow." "If he is anytblnk else he won't find it go down with me," replied Mr. Boffin, with dignity. "No, perlim not. Hut it's always wise jiollcy to be on good terms with a man In, 1 can aure you. Our friend la used to genteel company. That Is why 1 have brought lilm here, (iood night r "(1sk1 nlglrt, young man," said Mr. Hoflln, nit her mollified by his conclud ing speech. "Now, then, my good feller," he re marked, turning to the bow legged bailiff, after duly shutting and locking the outside ibxir, "I should my as the servants' 'all, with the hnnder-acrvants, la alsut your flt-tdiT' "Anywhere for tne, guv'imr. I'm no ways pcrU'kler," answered the man, with ft befitting humility, which still further mollified the butler. 'They'll lie having their supper now," continued Mr. Hoflln. "Ybu had liefer Join them at once." "Thank Ve, gtiv'nor. 1 could do a bit of vlrtles," answered the Imillff. "This Inventory buslrifUM makes n bloke peck Mi." "I can't my that It Ima had t a. t effect on me," mi Mr. Boffln'e answer. "I feet o If t ahould never enjoy my food again." "Ah, you ain't uaed to this aort of thine. guT'nor, nd ax It npaeui yer," amid the bailiff, with a eympathetje shako of Ma bead. "Mo, my man. am not uaed o It," anawored Mr. Boffln. "And the dle grace of It haa Hearty fettled ate." "I ';g!"ce!" ( jacii; Med lolegs. Well, now 'bat is a f rnny way to look ut it. UtiI love yer: I was in ar a lieurl' only last week and at a dook'a back in the summer. I iiey didn't tiiinn it no disgrace. And w liy should they? It downright fashionable It is really." Which, lu that nse, heaven preserve me from wot is uownngui ihbiiiohu ble." rejoined Mr. Botlin, fervently. But 'ere is the servants' 'all. my man. I'll take you in and Interdooce you." "Tbauk'ee, guv'nor." Mr. Boffin oiicned the door and usher ed the bailiff in. Here's a guest," he explained, "a Ik oiinr to loin vou. uriexre-ctel, at ups-rand I leave it to you to see that he's looked after and ban his food prop er and comfortable." With that, and with a gracious wave of bis hand, to signify that they might again be seated for all the servants had arisen at the entrance of that great Mr. Boffin- he withdrew to take his own supper in the housekeeper's room with Mm. Asprey. The bailiff bowed very politely to the assembled meniala and-seated himself in a chair which Martha, the scullery maid, placed for bim. The compony eyed hlin curiously, but coldly, for the nature of his calling and the reason of his presence were now pretty clear to them all. But lie was so civil and pleasant iqsiken aud liehuved so deferentially to Mra. Holly, the cook, and to Miss Hannah, the head house maid, and so affable to the Misses Karab, Jane, Kllza aud Martha, subor dinate domestics, and so resjiectful to Mr. William, the footman, and so pa ternal to Walter, the buttons, that they were all on good terms with him almost before they knew where they were. His conversation, loo, was spicy without bejug improper, and amusing without being vulgar. Nor did he ob trude his remarks unduly. Aa Mra. Holly whispered liehlnd her band to Hannah, "The man knowed his place, and kept there." Mrs. Holly and Miss Hannah were pleased to smile at his funny anecdotes; Mr. William to snig ger languidly; as for the four under lined and t' e buttons they giggled without ret-i . e. The servants' hall waxed altog- ! . r quite Jovial. It was obvious thai our bow-legged bailiff. In his social cuiuiclty, had wore a dis tinct success. Supper concluded, be addressed him self to Mrs. Holly with an tiwimmting and a deferential air; at the same time ppHlticlng from one of his capacious pocket a large, fiat case bottle. "You would be doing me a great honor, mem," he said, "ef you would allow me--and hoping you don't think it a' liberty to brew the company n leetle bowl of something hot." "Keally, sir," replied cook, regard ing the case liottle with a allocked, yet rather Innuisitl ve, expression, "that it u kewrioiis request of your, upon mj word." "The fack Ls. mem, I cant get on without my glass o' sperrlts. And orlwuys carries It about with rue. Hut It si-cms selfish like to drink It orl by myself, especially when you'v mado me so comfortable with my vittles; and If vou ..;:d the rest of the company would be tv Kind as to Join me in a brew of punch you would obloegc me extremely, mem." Mrs. Holly hesitated and looked at Hannah. Hannah hesitated and look ed "t M-. Holly. The Mlstes Surah Jin c. l-.i.ra Murtha looked at each oil. r ..!:.! t-iteivd. Mr, William looked at the celling. Master Walter at the wall opismite. The truth was this Only beer, limited In amount and re st rietcd In strength, vyis "allowed" to the servants' hall. And the prospect of a glass of something hot was attrac tive. But here, as at other polite boards, apparent eagerness for food or drink was out of the question. And so - from sheer good breeding everyone hung back. "Come now, mem." pressed the bailiff, insinuatingly. "Well, sir," said Mrs. Holly at last "I won'i say you mustn't, but I could n't touch a drop." Hannah couldn't touch a drop, either. Nor could Hiirnh, .lane, Eliza or Marilm William, however, was understood to suy that he didn't mind if he did. Wlilh Walter, gathering courage from Will lam's example, expressed an opinion in favor of ulghtnips and volunteer! to fetch the kettle. So the kettle was fetched, and a Ikmv and glawses and a soup ladle. Also at the Imlliff'g request- lemons and loaf sugar. Then he compounded a frag rant Jorum, with no unpraetleed hund Ami right insidiously delicious did that Jorum smell. Hut the iKilllff aud Will lam and Walter were all too gallant to drink unless the ladles gave them lead. Ho, not to disappoint them, Mrs. Holly taxtcd a d;-op, Hannah a drop, and Sarah, Jane, Kllza and Martha drop apiece. And then William and Walter and the bailiff neveral drops And everyone bectime pleaaant and af fable and Jocular; so that the acrvants hull presented quite a rollicking scene While this Jollity was lu progress Mr, Hoflln walked In. The mirth was in stantly checked upon his entrance and everyone affected to be unconscious of the punch bowl. The bailiff, however, stood up. and addreaalng Mr. Boffin with great deference explained the rlr cumstaiices under which he hnd taken upon himself to brew the punch, and ventured to hope that Mr. Hoflln would condescend to pronounce an opinion upon It. Mr. Boffin did condescend and was kind enough to aay, as be set down his glass, that be had tasted worse. "Hut wot 1 come In to apeak about,' the butler went on, "la about your sleeping accommodation to-night, my man. There ain't no bed aired ready, ao you'll have to make shift dowaatalra on one of the aofaa In the 'all. i If we d knowed that yon waa coming" (tala with sarcasm) "we'd hare got' the bea pare room ready for you,' you may bo aura." "Oh, Huytliii.g 'II do for me, guv'nor. I'll Im- quite satislied to sleep on the floor. If you like." "We voii't ai-k you to do that," s'.ld Mr. Boffin, cond.-sceiidingly. "Hamuli --see ibat tliih good ina'n is provbh-d with a blanket anil piller. and soow hlin , the way to the front 'all." J And having wished the uuder-fcer- : van's good-night, and suggiied that !t was 1 1 ti ii- they were going to bed. lie re-tir-il to hi own apartment. "Which." he bad previously said to he nonse-keei-r, "it's the first time in my life, Mrs. Asprey, mem, that I idiall have laid down under the same roof with a 1'UinbailifJ'. I know I shan't sleep a wink for thinking of It." But the circumstances did not, after all, aTect his repose. For he slept Just as well, or better, than usual. And when he awoke at a late hour next morning eh! what an awakening that was! For first it was Hannah, then William, then Sarah, then .'are who rubbed to him with such Item of ppalling news as made poor Mr. Hcf- fin's grav hairs literally stand on end. i He huddled on bis clothes i.. ..rr:i.iu agitation, and went downstair to we. for himself. Alas! It was ail too true. He now realize, with a dizzy sense of horror, how he had Iwn Imposed upon; how those two knaves bad so artfully schem- n1 It tlnit tbpv hnd made an Inventory of all bin master's most valuable curl- ' unities under Ills (Mr. Boffin's) very now; and how (for tne raet mat ooin ie aud all the other servants had slept so much longer than uaual now had f.n obvious significance) the household had leeii Inveigled into imrtaklng of drugged punch. The Komney had gone cut out of its frame; some priceless curios from the drawing-room bad gone; twelve "are volumes from the library had gone; ten dozen of the choicest wine !u tha cellar had gone; and so had the bow legged balllff.-Ixindon Truth. How Iover Worked. Samuel Lover's daughter, Mrs. Fan ny Schmld, writes her recollections of The Author of ivory O'More' " for the Century. Mrs. Schmld says: His Industry was such that In the busiest years of his life he did not even grant himself time to look at the daily pa pers, or to read any new book that wiu much talked of. His w!fe always read the papers and the new books for him, giving lilm in conversation a resume of the news of the day and the con tents of tlio books, so th.it he was al ways well Informed of everything that was going on. If anything exceedingly imiKirtam was on hand In the political world, or If any part of a book wan par ticularly Interesting or well written, these she would read to him while lie was painting. Many artists are as dumb as fishes at their easels; but he could converse charmingly while he was painting, which was a particularly pleasant qual ity for his sitters. In painting or In writing he worked indefatigably, and seemed to be Independent of the "moods' to which many artisis appear to be victims. As to nis songs, lie useu to say himself that he never wrote a song In his life except when he couldn't helpit.Tlu' songs used to "come to him," generally words and melody simulta neously, so that he had only to write them down. Frequently the Idea of a song would come when he was occu- pled with something quite uinerent, as, ror instance, winie paining, oe wouiu then leave his easel, write down the idea, and return to his work. After ward he would return to the idea, and work it out. New York's Composite Personality. Mrs. Hchuyler Van Rensselaer con tributes to the Century a paper enti tled "Places In New York," in which she gives a picture of interesting phases of life In the New World me tropolis. Mrs. Van Rensselaer says: More than 70 per cent, of those who people New York to-day were born of foreign mothers; more than 40 per cent, were born on foreign soil them selves; and many of these aliens, brought from many different lands, continue here to live In clusters with their own klu after their own kind. Yet while each of these clusters, and each of their wandering offshoots, modules the New World metropolis, nil of them together do not destroy Its cohesion, they simply intensify Its cu rious composite sort of personality. They make it multifariously diverse, but they leave It an entity. They touch every portion of It with pungent exotic flavors,' but as flavoring an American whole. They play their sev eral parts In a civic life that Is cosmo riimlc beyond the belief of those who have not studied It well, but they do not turn New York Into a cosmopoli tan town; for this means a town which, overwhelmed by Its strangers, has lost, or has never possessed, a character of Its own. Honesty Kebnked. After a cable car conductor hud pass ed me several times without asking for my faro 'I touched his arm and gave him a nickel. A few moments later a I left the car I found him on the rear platform alone. "Don't ever do that again," he said. "If ft conductor misses vou don't hunt him up. lie doesn't want vou to do It. If I miss a passenger the chances are about even that no one will notice M except the fellow hlmse-lf. Hut when he rushes up to pay o. fare 1 have miiwcd everybody notlcm die fact that I have been negligent, and If there Is a 'spotter' aboard I lose my Jb. The next time save your nickel; It may help me save my position." Chicago Times Herald. ' All tha Batter. lleW seam to bars fot here rath er too aoon, tha house a quit empty. Ih Alt the batter; every one will ba able to gat a food tMw of me as tbay coma In. Flefc-ltVUp. MOUNTAINS OF OYSTER SHELLS. Maryland's More Haa Amounted to Millions of Tona Thia lenturr. The waters of Maryland produce one- third of the oyster supply of the world J It yields twice us many of the luscious I bivalves as are grown in all fo"eign: countries combined. I Miring tn pres-' ent century it has put on the market 1 41 0,0l K l.i "0 luisbels -of the tootbsoni" mollusk. These have sold for the , enormous sum or .Hi,oni.'"o. Al most all of this country is dejie.idcut for the abundance and cheapness of this edible onthe supply of the Chesa peake. I'lom here also come very nearly all of the oysters used for fan ning. In fact, the output of this in dustry in Maryland hi equal to one slxth of all the fisheries of the United States put together. The quantity of oyster sheik landed upon the auoren of Maryland during the last century has been reckoned at 12,000,(KH) tons. 1'utll very lately the ; canning firms have had much trouble ! In getting rid of the shells, having to ! I -.4 .1 I n1l II.HI l lu l- lur u"' tney could not give away, um-uu), however, they have been able to sell them. They are now shipped to all parts of the couutry and are utilized variously for roads, for lime and em ployed in making coal gas. They have lieen found also to serve almost us well as stone In the manufacture of special grades of iron for railroad beds. Cultivators of oysters also employ them, having found that they afford suitable surfaces for young oysters to attach themselves to. They are like wise used to some extent as chickiji food. They are very good for hens, the shells of eggs being largely made of them. The trade received $2fi,000 in a single year for the empty shells. Starfishes are the oyster's worst en emy. Other animals the young bi valves have to guard against are crabs and txiring snails. They are also in danger of being stifled by mud. In Pacific waters stingrays are their most dreadod foes. The little crab that lives In the shell of the oyster has al ways excited much Intercut. It is found in about 5 lier cent, of the bi valves. It is a sort of parasite of the oyster, whose shell protects it and whose feed supports it Philadelphia Times. Kaved by His Horse. A good Ihorse story was -told by Sur gin Oaptoiu Orey, who was engaged ; lu the Mataliele war, In Rhodesia, SouCb Africa. ! A party of troopers was nearly cor ! nered by an overwhelming force of Matabelcw. Ir. Orey. to use his own , words, "led toward the way out under ; a raking fire at a gallop, and was close : ly followed by the troop. Very' noon, i however, I fell from the saddle, struck with a bullet from an elephant gun : alxiut fiOO yards off. The bullet struck : me on the top of the thigh, mashing i the socket of the thigh-bone, breaking a j vein, and otherwise wounding me. My , horse was carried on at full speed witli the rear guard, which rushed nt desper ate speed to clear the pocket-like en- i tnmte &f t)e ()rlft WMp,re thp mrres were rallying In the hope of killing us. "A I lay on the grass, bleeding pro fusely, I kKik.-d up and saw two natives alining at me nt a distance of about forty feet. At the same moment I saw my horse come thundering back from the drift. It suddenly stopped and came and stood over my prostrate liody, j .g me from the flring nml t the ( same time making a peculiar noise ; through Its nostrils. I thought it had S been wounded, and that with the pain, noise and confusion it had gone mad. Thta notion, however, was soon dis pelled, for it continued to stand over me In a kneeling posture, and I could see that the faithful animal had come back to protect, me. I may remark here that this horse, which I myself selected, I made a pet of. The assegais from the aproa?hlng naUven were now beginning to fly around me, and, Drinking If I could reach my horse's back I should be shot, which was preferable to being aKsegaied. I seized the rc-iim, put my right fKit In the stirrup, and made a supreme effort to mount And 1 was successful, but how I did It I do not know, for my left sidn was entirely par alyzed. On finding myself in the saddle, I ewlhxl, 'Go!' to my hoiwe, which dart ed like an arrow- toward the exit from the drift." Exchange. Millafs' Lore lor Art AVlicn a Hoy. Mrs. Fanny Schmld, daughter of "The Author of 'Rory O'Mooro,' " contributes a paper of reminiscences of Ixiver to the Ontury. Mrs. Schmld nays: 1 A little original pencil sketch drawn In five minutes for me by "Johnny" Mll lais (the late Sir John Mlllals) when he waa a Itoy of ten, Is a pretty remem brance of his precis-loiis talent. "John ny" was always restless and uneasy in any company until some compassionate person provided him with a pencil and an unlimited supply of jmper; then he was quite happy, and covered whole quires of paper In an hour or two with often really charming sketches from the almost Inexhaustible store of bis lmppy fancy. Abarnt-Mladed. Absent-Minded Professor-Delighted to meet you again after so many years, , miss. Elderly liBdyNo longer miss, profes sorI am married. Professor Married! Well, well, who would have thought that? Fiiegwide Blsetber. Simple Knontjb. Pat They do say the car nlit the In Jtne be the most danfcrous. Mike Begorra, then, why don't they Ut it off?-Houaahold Worda. A Wis Wife, Banham I had a close fcmliMs to-day. quaaaa la Mra, Baaham Tavr aact typewriter atoll k a ART IN GOLD LETTERING. lo the Plea Painters Place Their Work on More Windows. The sign letterer who in putting a gssl igu on a window iraints the let ters upon the outside first, but those letters are only for a guide: the gold 1 put uin the inside of the glass. The gold leaf is o thin and light that the faintest breath would lie enough to blow it away: it is carried in the famil iar lit lie Isioks. The loiterer brushe the inner side of the glutss back of the lettering painted uiKin the outside with a brush dipped iu water containing a tra.ee of mucilage. Then, with a wide and very thin cam el's hair brush, Whloii he find brush-eB lightly Imck and forth once or twice upon the back of Ms lmad, or perhaps uiKn libs coat, to dry it, if it needs dry ing, and slightly to electrify it, he lifts from the lsxik a seition of gold leaf eufliiient to cover a station of the letter ajid places it on the glass. He repeats these operations until the gla.sa lxick of the letter painted on the front is covered with the leaf. It may require three or four sections such as 'l be picked up with the brush to cover the letter, or per-h-ajis more, depending on ii size and shape. When he has completed Che ap-plk-atdon of the leaf to one letter lie dampens the back of the'next and pro ceeds with that in the same manner, and so on until the lettei are nil backed with Uie gold leaf. Thus applied, the gold leaf overlaps the letters more or ies on all sidea. It is bright in color, like all gold, but it is not shining; it is burnished by rubbing it gently on the tack of course it '.mi not tie rubbed on the fa-e, for that 1 against the glass with a oft cloth. It burnishes, however, on the face as well us on the lack. Then the letters are backed. The exact shape of the letter is painted over the back of the gold leaf to fix It and protect it, and when the liack Is dry the gold leaf projwting be yond the outline of the letter w brushed off; it Is not sought to save this pro jecting leaf; there is not enough of it to pay for the labor that would be in volved in gathering it together. Then the outside lettering, which i done with the paint that is but little more tlian oil, is rublied off, and the histroun gold lettering Is revealed. New York Sun. Storage Battery Cars in Korope. American street railway companies cannot, as a rule, be accused of want of enterprise, and they have spout a great deal of money In experimenting, or what is practically experimenting, on new systems of traction mostly electrical. Just now, however, in the matter of the storage battery, they are letting the otiier niiiii do the experi menting, and are watching carefully the outcome of the activity which is going on in the installation of accumu lator cars in lj:uroie. In Hanover, where a combination system of trolley and accumulators-Is employed, sixty ears have been equipped with batteries and eighty more are to be installed by next spring. The batteries are charged from the trolley line outside the city limits sufficient to carry the cars without the aid of khe trolley within those limlto. In Dresden thirty storage battery cars are running find fifteen more are to be put on shortly. Here, also, the cars are run by the trolley outside, mid by stor age battery inside the city. Iu Copen hagen eighteen accumulator oars were to lie put in operation in the beginning of January. The system employed will 1k entirely storage battery. In Hagen eight cars on the same system ai-e in operation, and ten more are to be add ed. In Paris thirty-five storage battery oil's are to be equipped on the lines of the Comiuignie du Nord. In Berlin the city government has decided to run on all the lines of the city storage bat tery cars of the mixed system, the oth er lines to Is? equipped with trolley. The underground conduit has been en tirely relegated, and it is expected that Berlin will soon hare in operation from (iOO to 700 cars actuated by storage bat teries. Chloroformed the Snake. The L. A. W. Bulletin prints a pic ture of a 14-foot snake and a letter from Fostoria, Ohio, written by An drew Kinerine, president of the Fos toria Bicycle Club, telling how the snake was captured and photographed. "The snake was traced by wheelmen for seven miles," the letter says, "over hills, a liver, the fair ground, find a nice track. It left a trail four inches wide In dusty places, and It was easily followed. When come up with he was on the top bars of a fence gate, stretch ed along it and hanging down like a clothes' line where he wasn't resting on the bar. "The reptile was captured by soak ing n sponge In chloroform and tying the sponge on the end of a fish rod. The sponge was held against the snake's nose, and bo soon grew drowsy. Then he was tied up In a hard knot aud wound about with ropes. Thou sands of persons saw the snake lu the city park at Fostoria, asd he Is now in the museum of the bicycle club. He measured 14 feet 0 Inches long." Kicht Thia Time. Miss Hilltop I notice that you use the expression "a well-groomed worn an." I do not like it. It Is a horsy ex pression, entirely out of place In speak ing of a lady. Miss Northside The expression Is correct this time. The lady I allude to has Just been married nud the groom Is a very wealthy man. Pittsburg Chronicle-Telegraph. Force of Habit. "But why did you accept him whan you knew ba waa In earnest r "Oh, force of habit, I suppose," Troth. If a man should ba suddenly changed Into a woman, ba oooldn't take kit kair dewn, er get klaafcrtbea aS. i 3 r I a IK' V 1 ff ' ' If' at NT- ; M it . - i