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About The Sioux County journal. (Harrison, Nebraska) 1888-1899 | View Entire Issue (Dec. 1, 1892)
l old Lwrtatel Ftwwr Latest U. Gov't Report
Vohnny Upperton (im-udently)
Vm your mother Uk in tab.
jMtry Lowerten (defiantly)-
(.--Well, sb take our wash
lglr-uSbe only doe that to
neighbors the has; an' shs
C folks sports silks an satins
Ctid, and wear the maaneat
Cton underclothes inside, an'
Uwt holes in y'r etockina,' an'
Jfjtt-Mhy'r necks; ao there."
IwttL TO GET CLEAB Of A COLD
V week, but it ia maeb better
I to rid yourself of it the first
Kit bours-the proper remedy
"purpose being Dr. D. Jayne's
(vHunter. "Do yonlWe here,
Boy"Veslr. In that house
that empty one.
Do you r have nice
Vo matter how mean we
C they don't say a word. Come
here and see me oreaa a
. .i.i.t far wMk will cure anT
) Constipation, Small Bile Beans.
Vl Merchant "If you don't
r L.n 111
ttO Dimness oetier, i u ituw
Clerk-"EhT Only yesterday
tou thought of taking me into
liag Merchant-"Tnat's what
Viineaa. eiercisa, and diet are the
QtirtiiM of trnod health. Take
fist Brat two. and if you know
ltd tow to eai, you neeu um
fit Is claimed that Garfield lea,
Veberb remedy, overcomes the
oi wrong imog.
Im It VhTIwn,
r-"Hv yon any nice mild
Iiierichnitz ffrocert Tan, I
roa Kliroel him before you come
Bronchial, Aathmatlc, Pul
7 Complaint, "Hroviit Bron
Tr thei' roanifeat remarkable
r properties. 25 eta. a bos.
It bo;-" Were you in the wart"
araj Whisker-"! ndeed I was, I
iny narrow escapes. One ball
is Boy-"Couldn't you find a
ta'a'rh Cannot be Cured
Local applications, as
bnnot reach the seat of the
Catarrh ia a blood or constitu-
,iaeaa ant in nrdar to cure it
t take internal remedies. Ball's
I cure ia takan internallT. and
KUt on the blood and mucous
I Hall's Catarrh Cure is not a
kedicine. It was prescribed by
beat nhTsicians in IMS
v.. . w-w-
pr years, and is a regular pre-
II ta MinnAuu or Ulfl UCBl
town, combined with the best
killers, actios? directly on me
nrfaoM 'I'ha narfect COIB-
of the two ingredients is what
such wonderful resulU in
ktarrb. Send for testimonials
u oieau, v.
d by Druggists, 76c,
The OU Han't Hlat-
millaa(ll p. m.)-"What's the
ou look distressed."
Billet "I thought it about
re that young tWlow in the
goroos hint tfasUs was near-
rtit ur nra4 riant m o
ind firing both f""
irst Citizen ff:ni(in n..,-i. ..
cauirht un ,h. ,, .
,, " r 'e'r woi stole
Second Ciiizen-"Ha, l,a- that's
"So, we shot him full 0' holes "
"GeewMttaker! He didn't have my
overcoat on, did he?"
"Jerusalem, partner, come to think,
I m 'raid he did."
e oughter be arrested evor. .
ye. This ere lynch law is a
IMPORTANT TO FLESHY PEOPLE.
h,e noticwl PW article in the
uoston (jlobe on reducing weight at n
very small expense. It will pay our
readers to send two cent stamp for a
copv to IJetina Circulating Library i
E. Washington .Street, Chicago, 111.
New Yorker "I wanted to get off at
116th street. Why didn't you call it
Conductor "I did, sir, I called out
One Hundred and Sixteenth street as
plain as could be."
New Yorker-"Hum! Xo wonder r
didn't notice it. If you'd yelled out
.Umerumerum-streetbstrut, I'd have
known what you meant"
The Only On Kvar Printed. Caa Too rind
There li a three-Inch dlnplay idverttafment In
Itili pr, thli week, which hu no two woi'l.i
like, i(pl ona word. The uma ia truo of
ach nw ona apnarln( raoh week, frorn the
It. Murtrr ilcdfclna Co, Thia honne placet o
"Crewenl" on ererytbinir they make and pnb
llth. took for it, arnd them the name of the
word and they will return you BOOK, KBAL'TI-FLI-UTIIOilKAl-HaorSAMPLK!
Mrs. De Pretty-"Horrorsl Thai
woman who just passed is a young
man in disguise,"
Husband-Well! well! How do yon
Mrs. De Pretty "She looked at m
face instead of my dress."
Pains from Indigestion quickly re
lievedwith one dose of Bile Beaii
Young Wife-"I don't like that cook-(nff-sdiool
teacher at all. t-he ha:
neither patieuce nor consideration
Site's actually crueL"
Husband 'Ureat snakes! Shedoesn'i
really make you eat the things, doei
"Your Work It Life.'
A aeries of 13 articles by successful
; min, niiranita ia one of till
IlJril JU ma , " .
many strong groups of articles which
are announcea in inc nn W"'Z
rnr iKttf -'Thn Itravest Deed I
ever Saw" is the topic of another series
by United stales ueuernis. u v
fnr tha ffiminff vear of J lie
v i mora vantui and orener
ona than ever. Those who subscribe
. .in iva Urn naner free to
nuo ....a tnr a full vear from
jan. i. i o?i, auu i - j -
that date. Only 1.75 a year. Address
The Youttu's uomfanion,
t on. TArYou think eirls isn't
brave. The Queen ot Holland is a little
bit of a girl, and mamma reau m ui
paper that slie was a colonel-so there!
Little Dick-"Huh! The paper said
.). was only a colonel of infantry.
Mus' be a baby regiment
hi words folks
tirad. Here I've
. atV an aa"w mv
v . .-U I Y mt
aa. TnaBDajr aiuu a ii
rjuunt mrirn it n ku w
tai ana u iiuwuu
V IU Will, loo. inttiui
but I found out today,
5m anything but bein'
thortuewaa going to
Sample Package Mailed Free
Address Small Bile Beans, New
Little Glrl-' The teacher says I must
getadairy, and write - . -
every day. wi" y"
m?!-r ..n.r nlentyofthera
unsUirsinthe lower drawer, fifteen
or twenty I think."
Mttle GlrI-"But isn't those written
Mamma-"Only the first pages of
v-inii r.at'Tf won did not drink
mJ f -
liquor you would have more to eat.
Tramp "Oh. no. mum; no, inu-ru,
mum. It's just the other way. If the
haxkeeker didn't see us buln' A drink
once in a while we'd soon starve.
Miss Antlaue-"iVo, I'm not going to
Mrs Whitehair's reception."
Miss Budd-"Wby notT"
"Oh. she always talks about old times
and that makes me tired. I don't tee
how you can stand her."
"But my dear, her subject ia new to
most of us. ?ou know."
A TarrlbU Strata.
It IS tftn Said that. m.rf...t. j. o- .... .. . .
reoose. iih.. .1 ."i" I oon you mink I can bea news.
edly exceptton, te tbTs rule it u . ' IT ?TT you' what U tbe U8
painful fact that I !' 1LI. iof.yl'iDgupso many studies on
bodyorswech-isnnt.. ih newspapers never talk
teriitio r,rr: L..r Birou CDar!lc-. -bout?
. uuuvil, An
emerlv gentleniaB was obliged to wait
over an hour in a railway station for
a certain train. The day was warm,
and the people s:it about the room in
various attitudes suggestive of great
exhaustion and discomfort.
' Tm so tired it seems as if I should
die! said one woman to another, as
they sank each Into a locking-chair,
and deposited their bundles on the
floor. They began to rock violently;
each flushed face grew redder and
redder. They had not strength
enough to talk, but they rocked
steadily on, until, "Cars ready 'or
Squantum and Way Stations!" smote
At thf8 fhoArinnr QnnminAn.nne ir,A
two women suspended their exercise,
gathered up their bundles, and walked
lifelessly out to the train.
There was a middle-aged man. who1
came in with his wife and two boys. ,
'Sophy," he said, as he sat down
heavily on one of the. benches, "let's
all keep still, and get rested before
we have to go Into that smothering
car." And Sophy agreed that it
would be wise to do so.
In the twenty minutes that the
group sat in the station, the man
who was going to "keep still'' crossed
and uncrossed his legs fourteen times
according to the elderly gentleman's
count. His wife Imltinml and un
buttoned her iaeker, four time, and
made live thorough examinations of
the contents of her bag The chil
dren made a dozen excursions to the
Among all the tired prople who
came and went, during the elderly
gentleman's sojourn in that waiting
room, there was not one who kept
As in a philosophical and pitying
mood, he recounted his observations
at supper, his wife si Id smiling,
"Poor things! They didn't know the
first principle of rest And you were
tired, too, my dear; I can tec that
from your forehead."
The elderly gentleman rose hastily
from the table; one glance at the tell
tale mirror convinced him that, while
sitting in judgment over that railway
assemblage, he had been vivorously
employed at his old-time trick of rult
bing his forehead the wrong way.
Wat It Faith Cure.
How the imagination acts upon the
health is well illustrated by the fol
lowing story: Some time ago ad
vertisements appeared in a number of
small country papers, describing the
wonderful electric properties of a
lately discovered mineral spring,
,hih was guaranteed "to cure every
Hiaaaaa under the sun." The most
wonderful part ot the sprinir was.
tKnt tl-tn nnft drill) k of its waters the
usual "gentle flow of electricity" was
felt, "bringing relief to ail." xui
advertisement natural!, brought
scores to the little village that was
t elng boomed, and corner lots ad
vanced in price. The air of the place
was bracing, the water was pure, and
those who came sick, returned well.
The directors of the company grew
richer day by day, until finally the
cat was let out of the bag when the
usual disclosures were made. The
public showed itself ungrateful for
the numerous benefits received, and
claimed that it had been swindled.
The directors asserted that the faith
... nnrt, of the treatment, nd
If the people would not believe tnat
was not tne company" mini -
"alwt.rir. snrinir" was ar-
WUUUCliui ' " .
.m a follows: It was only a
plain mineral spring, but the cups
that the patients drank from were
fastened by a brass chain to an iron
bar which enclosed the mouth ot the
bubbling spring. You were prevented
from coming too close by another cir
cular iron railing, about eight feet
. Thn frniinn around the spring
was naturally moist and it was either
this if round or tne iron rauiuB
i th nrtinf an oncn elec
ta! circuit. The cup held by the
chain was the other end. The per
son drinking, simply completed the
circuit through his body, and when
he had finished, the attendant kindly
and immediately removed the cup
?roni his hand. The drinker always
felt that "delightful tingling sensa
tion "and rejoiced that they had
Sound the fountam of youth. Some
oun . j , .ven felt the new blood
linaeinc" "-w .
"i thrnntrn tneir veius.
COurswK ., , . An
smaii iu" .-.-tari with the cup
and railing, was A cheap method for
a"a,r.'. 'thatlnvliroratlnB feeling"
Lui-t, fliiAd the patients with new
life and hope,
Father fa dramatic iritip "Thaw
are simply for mental discipline, and
the cultivation of the powers of
memory, analysis, etc."
Son "What good will that do V
Father "If you do not acquire great
powers of concentration, combined
with wonderful penetration, backed by
enormous retention, you will never be
able to gat tbe hang of the family
history outlined by the servants in the
iirst act of a new play."
Dangara of Pro -rastiuatloa.
Landlady "I s'poje you noticed that
long-whiskered gentleman who sat
opposite you at dinner today! That is
Prof. Driobonos, and you can have his
room, as be is going West ;on a scien
tilic 'exploration strangest thing you
New Boarder "What Is?
Landlady "The object of his tour.
He has been told that a pre historic
cave has been discovered out West, and
iu u k ten saeietons arouua a petn
Now Hr.nrHQ. "CTolII i.ll! 1VI
didn't the fools change their boarding
Mamma "I'm soimr out. and don't
want you to stir away from the front
Mtanft until T nnma halr "
Little Jonnv (who has been invited
to play ball) "All right, mamma. 1
won t stir a step; and if 1 iret tired, I'll
go in tli' house and read 'bout little
Samuel an' Daniel in the lions' den
Coin' to take a street car?"
Mamma "No, I'm onlv going across
the way to speak witli Mrs Blank.
She's at the front window."
Little Jonny "Boo, hoo, hoo!
Mrs. De Goode "Why arc you throw
ing stones at that little boy ?" Answer
mn that, air."
Small Son fverv trood at excuses') I
" 'Cause his folks doesn't b'lcug to our
A LlttU Taa Faat.
little Dot 'Paps says Edison if
makin' an engine wot will go two
hundred miles an hour."
Little Dick (son of a railroad presi
dent) "There won't anybody buy it."
" 'Cause it won't give the conductors
time to take up tickets."
The Family physician. Mrs. Helen
R. f-halters, 420 Walnut Si., Reading
l'a., stales: "We always use Salvation
Oil for what it is recommended in
place of a physician. It never fails.
Bibbs "How de do, Bob? Where's
Bob (sis's husband) "Gone shop
"What did she want?" ; -
"Then why did she go shopping?"
"To see if she could hud anything
that would make her want something."
Little Dot "Oh. dear, my dollie
hasn't a dress fit to be seen."
Little Dick "Make some."
Little Dot "I hate to sew."
Little Dick "Well get up a mission
society, an invite all th girls to
come an make dresses for the heathen
an' let dollie be the heathen." a""iTVTS TtXTOYS
T 21. T: .1. lit vtnmv0 d'Vtaf A I tlt- a- aa.avt.Mjl Vt4 VaMlllt vrliaMi
good boy I was today, and she gave me Syrup of Figs is taken; it is pleasant
a nennv. and then I orare it to Jobny and mfreshincf to the taste, and acts
mi If k.M ,MA.a Mnin In InllAnl " - .1 4 tT T, a. ilia TTllnOVfl
nillllL II HKUCUUIIUaUU KUIU w avuWA, I1THIII.IV ,TL UIUUIULII VU WUW amuww.w,
. ...IB. ' . r --, ' . ... ,., - -
Little Dot "What gooa wm mai UveT and Bowels, cleanses ine sy-
i . ,n I , Affi.Ah,.ll Aianala AAlna. hPflfl-
uu . I liCUl vireviuwii, uibmv.v
r.itrta Ti-ir "Wh.n I tell mamma I arhaa and fevers and cures habitual
that Johny Stout is goin' to school, constipation. Synip of Fig"
shell keep me home, cos j onny owuih only remeay oi iw smu ever iw
brothers got the measles. '
Ixiwell on Parkmnn.
t. nnat.htimoua and unfinished
sketch of Francis Park man, printed
i- n..i,,n .HmM Ttltaaell LOWCU
in .u. whvmij) " . ,
thus characterizes his intellectual
n.iaiittaa- "it, is rare, inaeea. w unu,
as they arc xouna in mm,
. , niMnraaniift and a native pre
IU1 Wl.w 1'."- , ' - - .
dilection for rapidity and dash of
In halnftll ancletV With PU-
tience in drudgery and a scrupulous
j.f,rn-ti tn t.hn rlffhta of facta, now
ever disconcerting, as at least sleep-
i -..rtnara in t,ri nnsiness oi nis
lUK'uai vivB -
rrhmiirh never nuttlnff On the
airs of the philosophic historian, or
assuming his privilege to oe wresoiuo,
. Parkman never iosob bibuu
those links of cause ana enec..
whether to be souf.ni in potii
.i .aiiniAn hniief. or mortal in-
completeness, which give to the story
of Man a morai, sou
tnitnm to the narrow nmiw wncrc
it properly belongs, "
A cBirTAiir araonn of wholesome
hwiorancs Is neoessarr to the enjoy
ment or stao to tha tolarstton ot
"What is August Flower for? .
As easily answered as asked. It is
for Dyspepsia. It is a special rem-'
edyfor the Stomach and Liver.
Nothing more than this. We believe
August Flower cures Dyspepsia.
We know it wilt We have reasons
for knowing it. To-day it has an
honored place in every town and'
country store, possesses one of the
largest manufacturing plants in the
country, and sells everywhere. The
reason is simple. It does one thing,
and does it right. It cures dyspepsia
EASY TO TAKZ
ot rafiaed and
petlon, Indigestion, Bilious Attacks, hck and
Bilious UauLchoa, and aU 4fWS
tbe liver, atomacb, and bowtli are prevautea,
relieved, and cured, Permanently cured,
too By tneir mild and natural action, these
tittle Pelleto lead the Tstm ito natural
ways again. Their influence last.
vA.nrtt.i,. o-itarrhnt in Iti nature.
catarrh iUelf, and all the troubles that
come from catarrn, are penccuj a,
rjermanently cured Dy ur. jjare yn-
tarrh Remedy. No matter how taa
your case or of bow long sianuiug, yvu
can be cured.
A Choice Gift v V V .''
A Grand Family Educator '
A Library i.i Itself V V
The Standard Authority fyt
NIW FROM COVES TO COVKB.
folly Abreeet ot the Timet.
Sueeeeter ef tbe authentic "TTna-w
Briaaad." Tan Taara leant In remains.
Also editors employ td, oyer aseo,000
sold Bt all oeatLnas.
OIT TMB BUT.
4 Tlo not buy reenntt af obtelrta tdtUom.
u. m, u. aaajufcAAja vv.
SprtagSaid, ltaafl., V. 8. A. '
duced, pleasing to the taste and ac
ceptable to the irtomach, prompt in
its action and truly beneficial in its
effects, prepared only from the most
healthy and agreeame suoetauceo, iu
manv excellent qualities commend it
tn all anil ham TnnAa it the mOSt
"He came along th' street, y'r honor, pular remedy known,
kicked a fruit stand into tu' gutter rfc of fa for 50e
dout lookin' at it" .-j ai hottles bv all leadine drug-
A 1 nlil n A vll rr mat WhA
mav not have it on hand will pro-
J .. . p
cure it prompuy wr nuy ww wu
wishes to try it Do not accept an;
CALIFORNIA FIG SYRUP CO.
against this man?"
specter, y'r honor."
What did be do?"
"He came along th' street, y'r
Trsmn "Plaasa mum. I'm nearly
starved mam. I'm so weak I can hardly
Housekeeper "Tramps in that con
dition nra net so danserous as the
other sort. Go on with your starving
Little Dot "Teacher says that rub-
hfr trans now in Florida.'
Little Disk "a'pose tney ao. jio
one aver thinks 'bout rubbers till it
rairui. an' than it's too wet to go into
Is the tariff to be revised at once?
That's the question. On this point
there are as many opinions as
there are individuals. One thing
is certain, there will be no change
this winter, it is not likely. You will
have abundent time therefore to con
aider a more important thing to you.
than the tariff and that is, your!
health. When you take cold, get a
bottle of Itied's German Cough and.
Kidney Cure. When the children get
cold, give it to them too. There is no)
poison in it and it will certainly cure;
them. Get it of any dealer. Small
bottles are twenty-five cents, large sizej
Sylvan Remedy Co. '
Peoria 111. '
tin mur.isca. cL.
uuisviut. ir. new row. K.r.
en THt ist,
ivartipr "Give a sentance illustrat
ing tha worHa 'elean' and 'cleanly.' '
Little Oirl "If a bov s motner anu
iiia o-r&ndma and his aunts and his
sisters and the servant girl is 'cleanly'
thn hnv will be 'clean some' some
Little Hoy "I shu'd think these
'thousandlesr' bues would starve or
Little irlrl "Whv?"
"Thev've irot to hunt for things to
eat, same as other bugs, haven't they?"
"Of Miina "
"WelL I don't see how they can keep
all those lem a-oln' an' win a oi any
Little Dot "What do they call these
Little Dick-" 'Cause you have to
drink an much water With 'em. Of
etiTTOoNS, eior Js,
Standamd Fiat a-waei Ce,
Month ft Expanses
to AQ-nrn to nLit
CIGARS TO DEALERS.
AgaffSSg SAMPLES FREE
Garfiold Toa si
izJtuUuttAmt Raatrflmnleiion naTtaDoCfa
I kind ehuMI IBUtalaO
, Mad staap tor smtMon
IN mmB Bt UMiaaaw
Photo rip hu whiio unokltiff. Mnoker- entertain
rneuas. iJeM'r scuius , w S
pie ud 20 pUte. WilQNoTeUy Oo-.iUUrftnte.lU.
STUTTERING and all H-'ecn impcmmeircs
V j .1.. fha nnlv InctittitA in the
aj CUrCO pcriiiam iiiiy. -.- V I-
U S. Letters promptly answered. Chicago Insti
tute tor Stutterers, 651 . iayiw .vuauw,Hi.
DO YOU EXPECT
rO BECOME A
I asmaSBV Morphine Habit Cared IbIO
RELIEVES aU Btomach Distress.
REMOVES Nausea, Sense of FuUuets,
REVIVES Faiukq ENERGY.
RESTORES Normal Circulation, and
Wants to Toa Tin.
ML HASTES MEDICINE CO.. SU Levis. Nev,
the ramout Little Pills for Constlntitlon.&lck Bead-
ache, Pyspopsta.No Naoaea.No Palm. Very Small.
AGENTS WANTED ON SALARY
WORTH DOUBLE THE MONEY.
II Send at once to Johk Sebutuii, O. T. a. Ik
l"l P. R. R-. Chicago, III., and riOTl. pottajy paid,
the aUekett deck of cardt you ever handled. Oal
TBS CENTS per paok. In ttampt or ooln.
Upend a few honra dally
tre. World Agency Oo
PR CTn BIRTH EASY.
ka M.t-., !-- M. al Short IMm.
aa- I. i. aaM In tan mlnutea
tith her ether eaildrm than she did nil
OKether with her last, after Mjmauaiau
our bettlea f Sdlai" -jaw,
ya a customer.
HmDMaon DAta, rmlt, Carml, IU.
9. Jai" TMasts"nauaoua, I fhTsI
B3I41 1 11 ;
11 mi mini
T'-rv-fl II I
Rn Vonr flvn ncnairinit;
aa w vaat sT
By ualnjr Root's HonseUolO epiriBs; wsni rrnaj,t-tim
and wns Boots, Bhocej ujd BubBers. Any pue ran uaelt. Prt
-JTZi.a .1 Wnvl n !,. TtuMiutiuh almafiT In use.
jl 'i Douaanaa unur in um.
ID TOOLS tor making and repairing all principal parts
tanwlnv. SimDlo sjABO with our Blotted rlveta.
ttBAvS BEAD'TO ifajUj i WP, any! Swwa yotran.
' Buckles, Loops, Bits, Blnsa.
ViArneM. Notewlnff. Simple aa
area, Haaie CUps and staples, luyeia, ere, ' "V Kama.
E1LF SCLES l&ffs
Halters, Breaamtraps, etc, asuuMutaaMiaa ,
tmltb tools, a a rnoe row annua - 7.-- rv
wutartTB van tfaaPBaamajn"
M Mmnn. TIIIVML KTMYl. IU IVDW, PTR
IlilZi. e..ni. nainlati andnraotlcaL no toys. Oatalec rrtsy
"'""-rKafta UaTAIMa. OHIO.
mgomi wsitwaii r "wi m ww,
atiMins siraULATON CO.
..nuaaam, ATtAlfTA SsS
It? ajJLS itjAfriea, t flyur'a
1 MaM, address
, N. it. k. SOI-)
SMHIiaitri . .
Pttot Bemeor for Catarrh
Beit, Battett to Use, and Ch
i.u K flranlata araaat
go. I T. EatalUne, Wsrrss,
rrn H the fl
sfHVsssss isatassssssssssstssVtataB. OsaMssTsssssV) ONVIa ftlN
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