THE AMERICAN.
MOW Ml rtMR ?".
ttiti Wttat II Wtt
tttkt .
1 hr tt. t Uf n l.,t l-'. It
lht . ( )w Ii lti I'm' rw '"
Stltttt .t .', t- Wl.il l .lt.1.
V'ri' 1 (if Vnt
rtl h.(f .! t. It .
Mt .li -I t -t '
h If '4 tt M rl (..
ft Hit t"v. V () l
,-t,.ai.ti . I.t V n. .i.t tt-.t; t I
It til l I I I- t t 111. l I
tt le.l !.. 4 r U '
)tm"t ! rt ! ! Mi i.wlt.t tif lit'
llCIt h.MM- Wtlt:tl tll Witt "I l
fUlltlUl tvM I k- tl Ihlk ttete Ilia
tisittfili iomo I tttt ti. it limite, ant
"S, ash. ' tt.ittlt, Mih, h ill.ttt
e wtoi till w u M 1 wftr ot he '."
the pits. 'iter interrupted.
"I tif tea weren't mm the
place l ell," ul the mgktrt
hsiply
"No, ash, "
"How tl.i you know l.ttfty wtt
there?''
"A Men' don toln me."
"Hilt, your honor, I'm sure I aaw Oil
aisn," the proseeut T ci li-il.
"NiS unit; Itil l.ttfty, Knii n'
didn't look Inter do chicken house
wharl wn-."
Oh, lt!" Mill I he Judge, So yon
were there after all. Well, While,
probably J'n run tell u what you
Were doing there."
White scratched his hfiiil nml said:
"I doan' strictly reetimemcr how hit
happened, jedge; hut somcltody
knocked me down nml toted me In nml
locked the donh."
TME CHATHAM
LIAR.
A Woiitlerful Mti, Hut He
Hail
In
rrotr III pmireM,
"Deiirl dearl" exclnlmeil Ueortfe II,
Peifrnm to ft covey of riillroml lilrdu,
"how ninny llur there lire in thin
world any how. Kvery niunll mid
lrre town him lis ntur llur, nnl my
old town li ii tl one. My old town wun
Chut tin in, Man., There watt, when I
wan a boy, an old fellow by the nitmo
of George Handera, who worn without
an effort the ullver star of chiunplon
longr illntanee liar for the town nml
neighboring vicinity, TIiIh fellow hud
been, aeeordlnjr ti hlinelf, lont fifty
time In (rreat oceiiu wrecks. Ilo had
wandered milled and atarvln up and
down cimnllml Islanil and had been
reeued in a mott providential manner.
Shark and whnlea had vainly har
bored (lcxljfii iij;aint hi life and in
Tarlably lie had led them a boiitlewi
ohan. In ilolnff all thl he had iiIno
atabllNhed IiIh alar reputation. Mint
day (leorjro ramn Into the town (inif
gng after htm an imimnn coiIIInIi,
Ha atopped at all tho hotiNea, he wm ho
well known, and, calling out tho ln
habitant, pointed with pride to tho
Hah and aald: 'Now if I had told you
people I had caught a flh of that alo
jou wouldn't have believed It. Uenrgo
kneV hi reputation well and ha knew
thattoffaln tho actual credit for h la
catoh that ho would have to work for
it It alwaya tickled mo to think that
thobl?ffet liar in town ahould catch
the blggeNt fish and then be compelled
to draff it all around town to prove it
Inillenlltiii nf Short l.lftt.
The losa of tho masticating teeth
before tho thirtieth year mean a
shortening of tho life of tho Individ
tial of from two to five yeara, To
know tho extent to which many of
these teeth are lost, even before the
fifteenth year, one has only to turn to
the recently published reports of tho
examination of tho teeth of children
In tho school and orphan home of
London and elsewhere. If aomo
effective measures are not adopted for
combating the ravages of dental decay
It looks very much as though another
half century would find tho poorer
classes of English people practically
edentulous before the twentieth year,
kvauinvr fttr int neati
The coronach, or mourning for tho
dead, la stilt heard in some parts of
Scotland as well as of Ireland. It Is a
weird chant, cries of lamentation be
in g mingled with remonstrances ad
dressed to the departed for leaving his
friends and relatives. Tn some remote
ountry districts of both Scotland and
Ireland professional "keeners" that
it, old women employed to sing praises
of the dead are still to be found,
though their services are by no means
0 often called Into requisition as they
were half a century ago.
There Was a and of Revelry.
To Justly describe the most brilliant
of all brilliant events, the Columbian
ball In Vicksburg, one's pen should be
dipped In liquid gold and rainbow
tint. The gvyly decked ballroom, the
oft strains of maslo, the kaleldoacoplo
blending of color In velvet, silk, satin
ad ffanre, the gleam of jewels, the
fairy flitting forms, the courtly cav
aliers, all combined to make a scene
tike unto the night when "Helglum's
oapitat had gathered then her beauty
nd her chivalry."
Of Alt tort aa4 Condition.
English papers report phenomenal
marriage which took place at South
Shields. The bridegroom was six feet
two inches tall; the bride three feet
two and one-half inches. The three
witnesses were a man without arms
who signed the marriage contract with
pen the stock of which he held be
tween his teeth, a woman who weighed
850 pounds and a man seven feet sl
inches tall.
rield-Crlokett.
In Lisbon male field -crickets are sold
fn miniature cages by bird fanciers at
the rate of a penny apiece. They are
kept in stock by hundreds together in
open tea chests, lined for the first
three or four inches from the top with
slips of tin, and are fed upon lettucea.
The natives like to have a "grlllo"
chirping in the room, and make it
pet
a r aim wwin,
1 ! M Mtt
Ifrtl Wat H.4
Intl. Itrttlw I tt t." t.
that t Ituii' Ut.k fitil!fmtl f
li,t- oiil n. hul Ih I, n t ittf h iMtr
'tii t t!t UI' '! : " M,te lliw
. It. 4' - I1 !(.' t li!i.l l t
; I" n M.t iiiirmmt f t.inHUt
Ho n ..f mm I H M 1 I one f .tm,
J i ttet-k''t t f' l"l''l t ft1
) til (t I 1 I .. flit it
t . ..i to If I iim With l.ittt
tit I i,r t.f Mo t'Uti l" H' i td 4
-OH Mir llil llo thtl !( t-otllit (.
ji.,t Mii I'ott Itn t il l
i utvl.-.t h I tit til Mo- lll tdte 1 1
iotlo.lt At ti e en ii"l In the It nl III
f-Ot.tltOt ! dill Itolllf, l ItlV
14. IV f.ij the loi il lin t tlie fcet
rt l i Imi to li ii' it lol litltr him
lu'itov I hi t iil ott imlil the Hii ty
uliihie ket'er hmilti'il Dint the limn
iioiI In tt'ttioiotlrrilt'il w tlh I hece
fine, the fettleMll hlllif rrlet
tote liltfht frttm I'otllntiit t the tiiinl
hour mul III the ooul itttulllloii, mid
the home hufinrf Ihi-ii uit Into the
I'otin'j itm e ami llo' niciu londitl In
itnunt, the livery ll'le heeper tiirnetl
to hi puMtetiirer mill remmketl
ith re wdly:
"l,tntU here, mtllre! If you don't
quit thlti Itlml o' tiiitlut'it pretty "
there'll tte ulnrflti' down to your htiune
Home ilitv. wml lr)fiii you won't hnnr
word of ll!"
8titiiithluif nhoiit thin nditioulilon
the grim pU'liiremitieueH of II per Imp
i-nufted it toitlnli Into the limn' mind,
ml he left olT hi trip to I'ortUnd for
mime time.
A FEW WORDS ON ETIQUETTE,
Tit Liberty nf a llilr antl the Man
lirrt of llnr IIiikiIi.
A hoKtt'M need not hold herelf re
(tpiinsililo fur the liliintt or dKlikltiM'a
of her (fiiettt. Nhe evinle thl by
iiviililiny Iritroiliictloim, but ahe doea
afford her circle the most cliiiniilii(f op
portiinitlc for i'Ntiililisliiii(T and iiinin
ta I ii I ii pleaHiiut aHHocliitlon. Well
bred pt'roii know how to continue an
acquaintance tliiicnually commenced
proviiled there I a mutual liking.
When Introduction take place at other
than formal reception, the man i In
troduced or prcaeritcd to the woman
unit- hn I young and he old or di
tiiigiiiNhcd, when lie 1 I n I roil iicmi or
presented to him, 'l'hn charm of aotdal
liberty ia the freedom to retain a
frienil atich a are wholly sympathetic
to ii acconllng to our Indlviilual Htjunl
aril and tiiNtc. It la bad form not to
lift tho hat when paNtting women In
hotel hall or when entering hotel
parlora or waiting room where there
are women; a an acceptance of thank
for ashUtiince or any eourteay t hat a
stranger may offer; nlo In response to
aalutatlon made to those with whom
a man la walking or In whoso company
ho la; or at any place or time at which
cuntoiu make till easy mark of gen
tleman ines and civility appropriate.
To raise the hat when paaslng wherever
tho dead are being carried oat I obli
gatory, '
LIFE OF AN
EDITOR.
A a Oriental
llltf'l lla
I'urmlUn.
nf an Ksrlhty
A recent Issue of an Kat Indian
paper contained the following note: j
"A achoolbny In (.ocrnhuya was i
asked to describe an editor of a paper. I
Ilo did so in this way.' "An editor Is I
tho luckiest man In tho world.' Ho
can go to a circus every afternoon and
every evening without paying a cent
He can go also to tho courthouse, tho
places of execution, and the races. I
"He has free tickets to all theatres, '
receives presents at his office, and gels
his car boned, too. He goes also to
I'rigen, Mailing, or Lawang (places of
amusement!, Ho does not do this
often, however. In one paper he can I
; deny everything that was said In tho
I I. 1 I I At. - '
I previous one, ami tie ioea so, as a
rule.
"When other people are already in
bed, the editor Is still up. He stays
up late to seo what happens. When I
grow big, I shall become an editor,
Then I can stay up, loo."
lie lienletl thm ( harga,
The attorney had a very Ignorant
witness on the stand, and, a Is usual
with that class, he insisted on telling
his story over and over again. At last
the attorney grew tired.
"If you please," he said, with some
feeling, "you will not repeat that story
gain. I have heard it In toto several
times."
"Hnh?" asked the witness, in sur
prise. "I say I have heard the story in
toto and I don't want to hear it again."
"I guess not," said t'je witness, "I
never was In toto in my life and I
don't even know where it is."
Sallort rar llrltlal Coaplaa.
A gentleman who has recently re
turned from Kurope tells of an old
superstition In rogue among the more
Ignorant classes of seamen. They are
of the opinion that the presence of
young coeple on their bridal tour
board ship portends violent storm.
The Canadian, an Inman steamer, had
young couple alMtard, and sure enough
the ship was caught In hurricane. A
number of sailors were Intent on
throwing them overboard and only the
courage of the captain, who opposed
the mutineers with revolver In each
hand, saved the lives of those who
were enjoying tho first weeks of their
honeymoon.
Artificial Stnna Flll.rt.
One of tho most Interesting points
In connection with the new waterworks
of Worms, Germany, is the fact that
artificial porou stones are used for fil
tering tho water. Tests showed that
the number of bacteria in the water
after filtration Is about one twentieth
of that before filtration. 8tcam pipes
are so arranged that the stones can be
sterilized whenever It la necessary
. A UHHIM JMttHNv V
ii ! !!! Wo a a t
it a tiia tir
i , t,i Mt it ,. A i n Vtf
tt.in'U .,,,! in ti it n ti't t-i It
In It t t, iii(f lll I'k'lll I Utitl
ll I , rt t' ' is I I I-'I , Wilh Mine
t.to I i , .,Mnti t,i.t t.ii Mo tUtttri't
t in S-. no in i Mii Mu- ini "( f I
f t i i, t I i. i i.. ii- in fl i -I ttU
till!, ) ilU I' .Ot lirt pl' l Mo ll
i . I . ii i t M.i ti t'- i h lti lit in ?
t oi l, ti l.t ti Mo j-i'l hit ' t h t
I in I ',. i f It" ii.j" M.i- noil I. tit
t i it h hi ill M!l
Ul.il U II Mul attt i. ..it' Hiii
rtH it ,i ri ait.t'd ntltt l .iiUhttti til
' Ml. i tttie I !. tin tltiit tt no- I
; n n M.HJ Itttf mini iit of a fnn' I ml
1 wintUI .ttl If. .Intuit the net I half
; 'minute l.oh of lit tre til Ml tnn
lttott M.e nti'lii it e "
I Hul we h.il Hot fill," rtpHed
Itlttliilltl, I eat-!!! Illtfl V.
1 lltil I haie ih li Miilti.il upon (hit
) ih , itnii.tt In Inkemy life "
At lite same tnoinent the man tn'nii
to wilirirle oh tut no that the rope.
tlaueer nearly lust hi Imlance. He,
howeviT, am in eimped himself,
tlropptiil hi balancing pole and
grablied the lunn an firmly with hi
hand that the latter wn unnttle In
move, Then, emit Inning hi w alk, al
though In a state of great trepidation,
he arrlvetl safely at the end of the
rojie, and, allowing hi living burden
to slide from hi shoulder, he admin
istered a box on both ear with such
force that the would tie suicide fell
down uncoriHi'lou. Since Unit terrible
journey lllomlin ha curried only one
man, hi true and faithful servant, ou
every occasion,
AQE OF ORANOE TREES.
(Iriive nt Hie ltlli'lnn Fruit Tree ran
I'd I iiiiinl In 1 1 sly.
An exchange remark that there lias
been much diacuashtn uniting American
horticulturist the last few years con
cerning the extreme age that orange
tree will bear well and produce good
fruit. Some maintain that an orange
tree, no mutter how much care Is put
upon it, will slowly withcrand die after
it has reached half a century of growt h.
Others have argued that about seventy-five
years Is the limit of usefulness
of a well-ciireil-for orange tree.
Hevcral American horticulturists who
have been traveling along tho Med
iterranean sea have recently found
trees over I7D years old that are still
producing fruit of excellent uulit.y.
On flu Island of ICIlia, where Napoleon
was banished, there Is an orange grovo
of over 700 Nt. Michael orange trees
that were planted by an Italian in
1781, ifnd It produced lust year over
l.NOti boxes of fruit, hut ft produced
four times that iiuntlty twenty five
years ago. There are several small
orange orchards in Southern Italy that
are over eighty years old and are still ,
productive of large quantities of fruit, "i
On tho Island of V11. nines I'yU- I
man, the famous American horticul
turist, found i m orange tree that there I
can bo no doubt Is H't years old, and '
that yielded several boxes of fruit last
year. It Is even alleged that In tho
Azores there are orange arid lemon
trees over !W0 years old that still bear
fruit, but there is no good authority
for the allegation. ,
THE
WIND DI04
POTATOES.
A
Tltlrt' Acre 1'nlfh nf Mitrihl
Kip-
I'fil I t at fell Swtt(ii.
Charles H. Ituddock of Chicag i, New
Orleans, Memphis and Carina, Oil.,
came In to chat tho other day, ami
told one story that will bear printing;.
Our exchange editor had Just re
marked that he wished to hi-it von ho
could shako this part of the world and
land in Noutlicrn California, where a
man could "live happy until ho died
rich."
"Why," said Huddock, "the wind
dig potatoes In (Southern California!"
"Hitmpty Ihimpty! What?" the ex
change man remarked, disappointment
shadowing his face.
"Honestly," continued Ituddock.
"One man had thirty acres of pota
toes, and there came a gala that uncov
ered every potato, and all ho had to
do next day was to go out and pick
them np,"
And then, as If ha wanted to get
away from the subject, tho Chlcagoan
Teunesseean Ioulsianian Callfornlan
went on to talk about his first love,
cypress,
A f'rofitliinal Olnwt-lluntar.
In the dark ages professors of exor
cism were Important and highly re
spected persons In tho community, but
omehow or other they fell nlf disre
pute and were finally abolished aa Im
postors. It Is satisfactory to find,
however, that at the present time,
when so many people complain that
they can find nothing to do, this time
honored profession has been revived
and at least one gentleman finds it
ofllciently profitable to pay for the
printing of circulars commendatory of
his business. It is addressed to "land
lords, house agents and those whom it
may concern," and states that the ex
orcist "will bo pleased to Investigate
and report noon any reputed haunted
house, ascertaining tho cause of and
putting a stop to all seemingly un ac
countable shrieks, cries, groans and
spirit-rappings at tho shortest notice,"
This Ss hard on ghosts.
She Wantad All I'artlnolar..
The Maine steamboat engineer was
polite and attentive. It may bo that
he was flattered by the fact thHt a laly
V) impressive In her manner should
have come to him for Information.
At any rate, he told her all about it,
Just where tho stearn went Into the
cylinder, where It escaped, and how it
was that tho piston rod attached to the
crank turned the wheels that propelled
tho little vessel through the waves.
Mia n r.rw.c r.l l.i tin till wrnnncd UD in
! tho information, and when he had fin-
! Uhcd she turned a beaming face upon
j him and said: "Now, what ! the ob-
I Ject of the boiler?"
IN Ai, AWN A,
tit Hit It t.rll la mt
H it t al 1 lti t I mhtttMt.
l ii lritfe ho (a one beettmisa
i. I I I t nd ,-l lite t ti..n
,. Mie ii.m.l-1 lihi h t.tte nj,.H.n
til nt Alatken at If h e ft liHe
t-. 'tt.s , tt HHt rliiMt Hg Hi.a
hi I.
'Alti H..t ift.f r. it . I the
fill , nl i f it H-'T Wl'.fc Mte hull t.tt m
..It M.f e . . t l leu'. tttty !,
Iitltvil Ml Wtft't't S4itl lit, Mtun
t i . inniir of mf fi- fttielltii
fit.i m , h -k .,f appiiet l,.(i. t I to r
an-the tii-nt eotitf ift ttt'e I tisie erer
on I he area's i the nt l t litittv
I. k't. Ill,'
ll.it ,.i,e .t,.ii fii. jftl ah .ttl llin i
p. t tie I- ii l i. t. m ith a pir of
Atitfih n wade leather tt stl or tth.if
li.lt mtii It toil id pue a an
l.nMtno ould on Ihe slreel of I'oit.
Inn,! with his pal ka (eostl, IioihI and
txtot mi
I W tiki wm in fur ii Iti eit'luie the
fur t'ltttl made of reindeer, seal,
aipilrrel, inlnkkUlu, el.' , but ninal of
the jtarty are provlile I with them
The h kkN are itsiia ly atl.i. hed hi
the coat, and are thrown back in
warm weather, leaving the head e
pttned, i The winter hunts are made of rein
deer and other warm skins, with the
fur on, but are not warm In wet
wenther. The hair of the reindeer I
as soft as bearer, and a coat of It
material will keep out the cold more
effectually than ten times It weight In
i woolens.
BPOUTINQ
LIKE
WHALE.
A
UK l iiimnl-r liniimt-ttil In a
f'tilllitnn
11 a iiinitr limit,
The two new Cunard Atlantlu liners
will be nearly as long a the (I rent I
Knstern, Aproproa of this subject, Mr.
William fuiiard, the head of the com
pany that bear his name, referred the.
other day to the pioneering period of
transatlantic steaming, when the sys
tem was n ssarily in a more tentative
stage, and related an anecdote of tho
ingenuity of one of the ship's carpen
ters In those early days,
One of tho bouts came into collision
and her bow was smashed in. A bulk
head was put In at the nearest landing
place to keep tho water out of tho
' l.l Tl,.... tl.n l,!.. ,...1
7 7. 1 , 1 1 . "
coimei'Mii- wim me. tiaiiiaeii poruon
of the vessel, a capacious chimney,
and Mr. Cunard asked what on earth
that was for. "Oh, that's for her to
blow," was the reply
"Sure enough," added tho relator of
this story, "experience showed that ho
was right, for directly they got to sea :
and the waves washed through tho j
damaged bows, air and water spurted I
from the chimney juntas from a spout-
ing whale, and probably they would :
not have got safe through their voyage
but for tho carpenter's foresight"
HE OOT OUT.
I lot a !Mitaai!huatt Uniig Unwittingly
llelaaaed a f'rltoriar.
A Judge of a Massachusetts superior
court has a habit when making a
charge to tho jury of allowing his
voice to drop so that his words can
with diflloulty bo caught. While sen
tencing a prisoner at Lawrence, ho fell
Into the habit, and a man In tho court
room shouted; "Hpeak louder, your
honor! Hpeak up!" "Hend that man
out, Mr. Officer!" said the Judge; and
a friend of tho individual, knowing tho
penalty which might be inflicted upon
him for such a contemptuous proceed
ing, advised him to get out of town at
once. Ho tho man hurried out, and
tho case went on. "Call the next
case," said the judge, when ho had fin
ished with tin prisoner In whoso case
tho Interruption hud occurred. "Ter
ence O'Flynn!'' called tho clerk; but no
O'Flynn arose. Tho crier called him,
but there was no answer, and the offi
cers of tho court began to look about.
It was discovered that Prisoner
O'Flynn had disappeared that morning
and his absence could not bo accounted
for until some one said; "May it please
the court, Terence O'Flynn was the
man you just sent out,
I IN I I
Trait of the Nairiapr liny,
The newspaper Iwiy is fond of work
-that Is to say, ho loves to sit and see
it accumulate. Ho loves to contem
plate work in the abstract Its details
are less interesting to him. Tho sound
of the call twill Is music to his ears. It
never annoys him In the least. There
are several authenticated Instances on
record where he has been known to
answer the bell. His forte Is the
running of errands those not con
nected with the business of the office
for himself and friends. He likes to
assist the elevator man and make him
self generally useful outalde of his
usual duties. The dull routine of offlee
work is too limited sphere of action
for his versatility. In fact, the news
paper office boy is something per se.
The S in all at t Tat.
Quality rather than quantity was the
principle upon which Washington
bride planned her trousseau. The
marriage which could only be classed
under the head of runaways was un
doubtedly the subject of much deep
thought beforehand, inasmuch as ttc
accessories of toilet to be carried upoa
the eventful trip were reduced to the
minimum. The wedding took place in
the summer, and the conventional
traveling-bag waa replaced by a whltt,
aco parasol. This was carriod furled,
the flimsy white flounce serving as a
receptacle for tho trousseau a pair of
curling tongs and a tooth-brush.
(,lm I tad Knoirlndga.
A woman in tho Western part of New
York state wants to have her pastor
dismissed on the ground that he rides
a bicycle and studied medicine In his
earlier years, which suggests thestory
nt iha wnrniin whn wrote ihn following
note to tho teacher: "Picas don't
teche my Mary Jano any flaiology. I
don't want her to know about her
' Innarda."
Alftn on AMtm.
a t4 Sti'1 t4 M It vii l
i taM in i tist tin
"Mot tf iwii.t Ihe t.i ntl I ire. H
1il'k, ' iHtne M, Ihry i mt --..nli-. I
the ititfHti.Mi n tahi.h Mi.it I-t,
(low tvhaiti 1 lit t I v., 1 1, 1 If i on
t til a iiil. '..Htnt tutd rmine
the ft of a tmby a an lt old y.m will
tw lltt the t Ik- h It n ace tsi
end with lit i tin .ti ho imtkii.l..
I i the lttti I eve lit tin li itt
hlth I he i I hi ii will it. er ti t
If Ihe t hlld t a tittle Mi tk, In i .i
itoiikiiie Ihe thtd W hell tt fr nt k I t
tte S Itinlt If II It of Mi. i.ilii
tht-V Hill make the .1 m n whuli Mie
els pi Ike, t 1 1-- .1. it I ' V in n t itlte I i
lite and l'.!et ilixlii. ,t li,tl.'ll.'
ahae of Ihelr le.it U 1li te I tv t haiiiT
lug the direction In ln. h Ihe halt
grow Tn all the I v itttly;
" 'Mekkletii. w hat you unit eiitinl
te. All the I'titHitg Iron and laot-
In the world are powcrles agsliikt Ihe
decree of nature, Moreover, It would
tie fmtllkh for ymi t.i make in h a
rhange even though It were pimsihle.
Nature it a good arlt, and If her hlcit
are folhtwed the result la always gmtd.
A little training here or there may I mi
benfllciat, but the general plan of tin-
titre should tte followed and not op
posed. He thankful, messieurs, that
you have heard, and tin not try to
straight heard wh i wish to make
them curly, and those with curly
beartls who wish to have them straight.
It is possible to curl straight hair, ami
also to straighten curly hair, but the
effect I temporary and more or les
injurious.'"
LEADS TO DIVORCE.
Ml Nellie K.inl Tltlrt jr-l'otir Yttara nf
Wt-tlilcil llll...
Snoring In a hiblt that is prolific of
possibilities. It i the cau e for a (11-
vorec suit now pending', and will no
doubt, completely disrupt the marital
relations that h ive peacefully existed
for thirty-four years.
Whim Mrs. Amanda tirlntr was a
i blooming maiden, her present husband,
John II. Oring, won her for a bride.
Little did the blushing maiden at tho
'altar dream of the future musical ten
dencies of her lover's nose.
The pair lived happily together for
years. When first Mr. (Iring's nose be-
gan to disturb the serenity of tho night
with Its sonorous outbreaks does not
appear; lint in her petition for a di
vorce, which was filed by Mrs. Orlng
lately, she allege that Oring makes
such terrih'o noises at night that alio
is unable to sleep. Inquiry developed
tho fact that tho noises consisted of
snoring.
This will give to tho judges a nice
matter to p mder over. Is a man re
sponsible for snoring? is there any
way in which a nose can be mu..led so
as to take tho sharp edges off tho dis
tracting noise? If Mr. Orlng is not
responsible for tho outburst of his
nasal organ, can his wife get a separa
tion? These are knotty points and of
great Interest to tho world at large.
If snorers are responsible for their
snoring, the public who use sleeping
cars may yet find reparation for dreaui'
less nights in Pullmans.
A baen t-M Inded.
A man In flonth Hiram, Mo., sat bo
fore tho open fire tho other day twirl
ing a hundred dollar bill In his hands.
The queer part of this story is, by tho
way, that a neighbor, afraid to trust
himsclf,had handed overthell'iO to the
twlrler for safekeeping. What did tho
latter do but right In the faco arid
eyes of the owner; while talking busi
ly, toss tho money Into the fire. For
tunately tho bill was only scorched,
but our Hiram friend has corne to tho
conclusion that an absent-minded man
is not a very good safe deposit com
pany. (jnaar Crowt In ew Z aland,
Hlr John Lubbock tells of a particu
lar crow In New Zealand where tho
male and female differ wldelv as to tho
structure of their bills. The male bird
has a bill, stout and strong, adapted
to cutting and digging Into the tree,
but he Is deficient In that horny-
pointed tmgue which would permit
him to pierce tho grub and draw It out.
The hen bird has, however, an elon-
gated an 1 straight bill, "and when the
cock has durr down to the burrow tho
hen .rmert her long bill and draws
out the grub, which they divide bo
tween thern.
Rather too fravloo.
A party of young ladles visit the
observatory to have a peep through
the monster telescope at the new . m
et The astronomer conducts thotn to
the Instrument, and the ladloa look
through In turns,
"Oh, Laura, isn't it charming, heav
enly, enchanting, wonderful?" and so
on ad libitum.
After a while the sly astronomer ob
serves "Now, ladles, I will remove the
cover and place the instrument in po elors may carry their frayed and bro
ttion, if you will allow me." ken garments, and for a small cost
have them put Into good order, ThU
A Matter of Ktaeotlon. move seems to be rather unkind to the
When Turgot was minister, some marriageable girls, for such facilities
one enthusiastically advocated a cer- will doubtless tend to confirm many
tain method of raising money for the eligible men in their state of bachelor
government. Turgot disposed of the hood, but It Is unquestionably a boon
subject shortly and rigorously. Ills to the unfortunates who have to do
Judgment waa known to be good, and their own mending, or give away their
little more was heard of the tax in clothes.
question after he wrote on tho
morial: "It would be aafer to execute
the author than the project."
Oriental Rua-a. '
It has always been a popular belief
fjat tho manufacture of rugs In the
orient was carried on by men almost
exclusively, but It Is said that women
Jo most of tho work. In Adc"k.uA
other occupation Is pursued
tent, tho whole province is
tirely supported by tha lab
women. This Is "women
with a vengeance!
A TH At,
H fi,ti4
Mm i ! t a
pel
V.tUr. ni"!!!! hi p. k t haa
l.tltv tiik'lkitl a tiwpenlr.t ''IS
w to, h
W ,t ff the It nie Me are aetrr
luMti.i. .1 w Mh rau
U i.i h , - n Uo Iky. ttktd f.r i iaek
lit toil '
V i in it r it, mil of aitv amd "
' Ml i r.tlf.l' t.tti .1 1'tkled In
Miik tit titn,.f ti
' We altmit t.ttv out iti AY f.kttint
Jiik,i lieie ltts. win that
f i' nt I It,. ti.k r )tiii.iii d ttiitgiit(f
d.itin Ihe t,)t lU Mm f e haie a de
il v f f holding i when emik
liif "e never est rtfir "
" And tiy fohllnif lheM tt Ire loop, aa
ymi see t,t doing now, It ntake a hn
tly arrangement ftr holding a small
mirror "
"Haven't the slightest use for sueha
thing "
"While by adjusting another small
mirror In this position and another at
thl angle, a you will notice, and
placing it In a kitchen window, for ex
ample, it ha the curlon effect of en-
'abling Ihe observer, aeated at one aide
of the window anil entirely nut of
sight ti are distinctly through any
window that may tie opposite ami to
note what I going mi IiisJile, and all I
auk for thl most UKcfut ami compre
hensive invention I seventy-five cents,
which Is only about one-half''
"I'll take It"
PREMIUMS WELL PAID FOR.
Cuattiittitr Genttritlljr 1'njr T limit it the
Note for Wht fluty (let.
"These are trade inciters or sweeten
ers," said the proprietor of a wholesalo
ilrughouse,a he opened a box contain-
'"a h'i" (fos of what appeared to bo
a"1'1 watches. "These gold filled
watches are given as a bonus to dealer
to handle certain goods. One of theso
watches is given with every thousand
of cigars that he buys and five-cent
cigars at that. A dealer can cover
himself with jewelry, fill his house
with pictures, have a piano anil nn or
gan, a delivery wagon and it carriage
without paying a cent, The sale of
baking powder Is promoted by giving
clocks to dealers who buy a certain
amount, anu wonueriui to relate, a
fine lamp, retailing nt S7.50. is given
to tho dealer who will buy .50 worth
of a kind of chewing gum. Delivery
wagons go with pu retinites of soap and
baking powder, and road carts are
given away with it number of articles.
Nets of bed room furniture are given,
with a good sioil deal In cigars; pic
tures with bottled whisky and olier
things. Here's an aluminum wu'ch
with it steel chain and tho watch will
keep time, too that Is given to any
lucky ,la,,r wh" wl" ,M,y SM v"'rlh
ot cough drops. Olllco desks arc also
given with cigars; so, also, is a ticket
to the world's fair and return. Simi
lar schemes go' with coffee and fancy
groceries. Who pays for It? Oh, the
customer, I suppose, but he never
knows It."
Aftar II I in, Too.
A child story comes from the lively
little town of Harrison, Ohio, A bad
small boy there crawled under the bed
when his mother wariied to i unlsh
hi in, She couldn't get him out, and
she left him there until his father re
turned that evening from the city.
When the father eamo and wa told
about the case he started to t't'awl
under the he ) to bring forth h's diso
bedient son, but was almost paralysed
when the ill. Liu fellow asked: "Hollo,
is she after you, too?"
Vcrlplitr! .tiilliorli y fur t rlvarlUInf,
A rever-nd gentleman, who has
charge of the advertising of a promi
nent religious weekly, was recently
asked what scriptural authority he
could find for his occupation. "Oh,"
he replied, that is easy enough. Ad
vertising not only has script ural an-
thorlty, but is of very respectable an
'I'lK.V well, If you will look In
Numbers, xxlv, H, you will find
Halaam saying, 'Come, now, and I
w" advertise,' ftnd Hon says In Ruth,
lv ' 'An'1 1 thought to advertise.'
Advertising Is no modern thing.
-.
ro w amnion rvi sasfw wi mnm$
A quill pen maker says that no pen
will do as fine writing as tho crow
quill. It requires the assistance of a
microscope to make a proper pen out
.if such a f,ull1, but when made It Is of
wonderful delicacy, The microscopic
writing told of In books of literary
jurlosltles was all done with a crow
quill. The steel pen of the present
hare very fine points, but somehow a
finer point can be given to a quill than
has ever been put on a steel pen, and
for delicacy nothing can equal it.
Afalmt the Olrlt.
The Women's educational and Indus
trial union of Itoston has established
mending bureaus where unlucky bach-
A. nt Qitlll 1'ent,
A quill pen maker aays that no pen
will do as fine writing as the crow
I auill. It reaulros tho assistance of a
microscope to make a proper pen out
of such a quill, but when made It Is
of wonderful delicacy. Tho microscopic
writing told of in books of literary
'urlositles was all done with a crow
quill. The steel pens of tho present
have very fine points, but somehow a
ncr point can bo given to a quill
ii has ever been put on a steel pen,
for delicacy nothing can equal it
ttrniNOiNa
