POEMS UNWRITTEN.
There ere poems unwritten, and Kings nil'
avrnt.
6reeter than any that extr were heard
roer.xt that wait lor an angel tuncue,
ongs that but long for a Paradi bird.
Poems that ripple tlironsh lowliest lives
roenn unnolea ana liuiuen awar
Down in the aouU where the beautiful
thrives.
Sweetly as dowers in the airs of the May
Poems that only the aneeh above as.
Looking down deep iu our heart mar be-
Felt, though nneen, bjr the beings who
love in
Written on lives as in letters of gold.
Unidentified.
TBAGEDY OF EAGLE CUFF.
by nnno kteoxo.
Before yon have finished this story
you will each and all agree that Bertha
Stanhope was a fiend; but I Ml you
that at first she was not bad-hearted.
She had the misfortune to be born
ol weaithy parents, and that is a
positive misfortune to a person of her
peculiar temperament.
They did wrong with her all the way
along.
They indulged her in everything,
until by and by she thought the world
was at her disposal, and if she had
particularly desired the moon she
would have been ungry with it if it had
declined to come at her bidding.
She grew up a beauty, and was ad'
mired, just as beauties have been ever
since the creation.
Her style was a little peculiar, and
this peculiarity addwl a charm to her
beauty. She had a blonde face, with
creamy white skin, and a color like
a rose. Her eyes were blue, wifh
golden lashes, but tier hair was black.
She was tall and lithe, with exquisite
feet and hands, and a bust which Di
ana might have envied.
This description is a very poor one,
and I doubt if you will get from it any
idea of her loveliness. But somehow
these descriptions of perfectness al
ways tax my ingenuity severely, ,and
I am ready to admit that I u rn unskill
ful at them.
At eighteen Bertha was betrothed to
Francis Tremaine.
It was more the work of the parents
on both idf Minn of the young people
themselves, for Bertha was too much
taken up with her train of admirers to
think much of marriage, and Tre
maine himself was still at college, and
wholly occupied in Greek roots and
Latin terminations.
He knew the understanding, and ac
quiesced. His father and Bertha's
had been close friends all their lives,
and this union of tho families by the
marringe of their children had always
been a cherished plan with them.
Indeed, it had been talked of so
much in both homes that Bertha and
Francis both looked upon the decree
as unalterable, and never thought of
disputing it.
She was fond of wealth and style,
and as Frank Tromahie's wife she
would be fully gratified in that respect.
And Frank admired beauty, and had
thought vaguely, as young men will,
that when he married ho wanted a
lovely woman, and so it seemed that
for once nil parties were suited.
Two years after t he betrothal Frank
graduated, and began the study of
law with Judge Brewster, at Amsgate.
Amsgate was only two miles from
Bertha's home, so he rode over to see
his fair betrothod quite frequently.
Aud these visits brought about an
important result,-- They won for
FraukTromnine Rertha's whole heart.
It was not a noble or generous one,
but such as were her capacities for
loving, they were all lavished on him.
He camo up exactly to her ideal
hero. He was tall and dark, with
curling brown hair and beard, deep,
expressive eyes, and an air of con
scious strength and integrity which
gave a nobility to his bearing and a
grace to his manner.
All Bertha's passionate though
selfish nature awoke and went out to
him. For her there was but one man
in all the world, aud Frank Tre
maine was that one.
True, she laughed and flirted with
her other lovers, but her heart was
alwnys turning after him.
Not in that way was he affected
toward her. As 1 said before, he ad
mired her beauty, and supposed ho
should marry her, but he did not feel
for her any more real affection than
lie felt for Susie Day, or Annie Deaue,
or half a dozen other girls.
Sometimes this consciousness
troubled him, and ho wondered it he
really had any heart to be touched,
but he comforted himself with the
assurance that it would be all right
when they were married. Of course
he must not expect to be so deeply in
love as the heroes of his favorite
novels. People iu mil life never
were.
A year after Frank Tremaine's grad
uation he was admitted to the nar,
and the following autumn he was to
be married to Bertha.
He was twenty-five now, and quite
capable of having opinions of his own.
And by and by the conviction began
to creep over him that he was able to
love better than he loved Bertha. He
realized that she would never be to
him all that a wife should be.
He was frequently tired in her pres
ence; her talk bored him; he was on
guard constantly lest heshould arouse
her fiery temper, and if ho made the
simplest assertion she was prone to
argue the matter with him.
And if there is anything on earth
particularly and abominably detest
able it is a, person who is always ar
guing. Heaven defend me from that
individual, both in this world and in
the world to ccme!
Bertha bad a natural taste for ar
gument. She would contradict one in
the most trivial matter, and would
bring up more arguments than ever
went before the judge of a criminal
court, to support her theory.
But Frank was bound to her in
honor, and he must make the best of
it. A man who has asked a woman
to marry him cannot recede from the
compact and sliil retain his good
name in the world more especially i
the woman loves him.
Frank uttered no complaint, but
went on in the old way, riding and
walking with and visiting Bertha.
And every day her affections became
more unalterably his. 1
She flashed nt his lightest touch; she
trembled when he spoke her name; her
eyes grew i xdiant at his approach; she
was a different being when he was
near.
THE
She loved truly nothing elm in the
world, unless an exception be made in
favor of Teal, the creat Mood-hound
that dogced her footsteps contiuually
She had brought him up ironi a mere
pup, ana though savage and cianger
ous with others, he was faithful and
affectionate with her. He was intelli
gent, and seemed to understand per
fectly anv order civen him bv Bertha.
and would obey it nt once, no matter
now unreasonable it mislit be.
In June Ames Fane came to Stan
hope Hall to visit ifertha. Ihey Had
been school-friends, and were quite as
devoted as eirls usually are under
such circumstances.
Have von seen one of those little in
terior looking, brown-haired women,
with c revisit eyes, and no color worth
mentioning, suddenly develop beneath
favorable influences into a blossom
beautiful as a royal lily, and rarely
sweet as the fruit of the tropical ban
yan tree? Then you will understand
how Acnes Fane developed.
lHrtlia had always thought hersuch
a plain little thin:;, and tvould have
laughed merrily had any one suggested
the possibility that Frnnk Tremaine
would ever cast a thought after bur.
It must be admitted that nt firsc
Frank thouuht her rather uninterest
ing and decidedly plain, but by and by,
under inlliience of a glorious sunset
inspired and warmed by the gorgeous
ncss of the cold and purple and azure
the plain face became absolutely
brilliant, the great grayish eyes lighted
up, and were like wells of thought and
feeling, the pnle cheek fhiHhed and the
delicate mouth wore a smile such
might not sit amiss on the lips ol a
saint.
Frank caucht his breath ouicklv.
and turned his face away. A sudden
fear, swilt ami terrible, and Eicantic,
wpt through his soul. What if not
loving Bortha, he should marry her,
and then love another?
That sudden revelation of character
of what a woman niieht be as
shown in tho exalted countenance of
Agnus Fane, cave him a clearer insicht
into his own heart.
He hurried away from the Hall,
and did not co there asain for several
days, lie could not exactly analyze
ins leeiincs, but he knew it was best
he should keep away.
1 hen Jiert ha sent for him. She was
an exacting girl, and liked tohavehim
often with her. Of course he came.
Agnes flushed slightly when he touch
ed her hand. There was a subtle in
telligence between them which told her
that she had been in his thoughts, and
made him delirious with the wild iov
of daring to believe that she was not
indifferent to him.
After t hat he cave hinrsclf un to the
fascination of loving and winning her.
Not that he ever thought of it in t hat
way for he would not think but he
was conscious of a new glory over all
the world, aud a new radiance in every
glitter of light that swept down from
the sunlit heaven above him. For
it was always sunshinu now.
And what of Agnes? Did she realize
whither they were drifting? Not fully
but this oUrt uncertainty was very
sweet.
She had had so little happiness in
her poor, starved, poverty-striken life
and she did appreciate so fully ail
max irank Tremaine was and all
that she might make him.
X uo not defend her; doubtless she
was wrong; but every woman deems
it her right to be loved. Heaven
created them all with feelings which
can never be satisfied without lovo
no woman ever yet was thoroughly
at rest unless she was secure in lovinc
and bomg loved. And shall Agnes be
blamed for asking what was her right?
I am sure 1 no not know.
Bertha went on, apparently un
moved, but sho saw it all, and a fierce
hatred of Agnes was born in her soul.
bhe did not blame Frank he was
faithful until she came and fascinated
him with her selfish eyes and her little
bursts of enthusiasm over tho things
he loved.
So matters went on till the first of
July, and Agnes was to remain at
Stanhope until September.
Frank desired to be faithful, and
knew that he could not continue so if
he remained where ho should see Aff
iles. It was necessary that one of the firm
to which he belonged should visit St.
Paul on some business connected with
an important suit which had been in
trusted to their management, and
Frank hailed this loop-hole of escape
with delight.
If he could go away and stay until
Agnes was gone it would be nil right.
So ho made application for the jour
ney, and his partners willingly agreed.
Neither of them cared to incur the
risk of fover and ague at that season
of the year.
Frank said nothing of his intentions
to Bertha. He knew she would op
pose tho scheme, and he intended to
commit himself beyond hope of get
ting rid of it before he told her of his
contemplated journey. And then he
should represent the case ns a very
urgent and pressing one, involving no
small nmount of professional honor.
On Thursday he was to leave, and
on the preceding Tuesday he called at
Stanhope. It was getting on toward
dusk, and Miss Fane had just lighted
a caudle to go upstairs. It was
lonely down there in the parlor, she
said. Bertha had gone shopping to
Amsgate, and she was alone.
Frank was musing of tho danger he
incurred in remaining under the
circumstances, but ho was not strong
enough to go away from temptation.
This sensation of loving was some
thing so new that it was delightful to
they can go and yet not quite fall in
to it.
So Frank lingered.
Agnes was now more charming than
usual. She dressed always with good
taste, but he had never seen her look
so well in anything as she did in the
soft black silk which left her arms
and shoulders bare and white as
pearl. And tho hall-blown damask
rose in her dark hair was no more
vivid than were her cheeks. Warmed
to fever heat by the subtle sweetness
of his presence, all those who have
loved will understand the charm
which kept Frank a prisoner beneath
her smiles for those who have never
loved I am not writing.
She rose to get an engraving of
which she had spoken to him from the
table. She wore a guaze scarf, and in
advertently a corner of it was swayed
by the motion of her arm into the
blaze of the taper.
Frank's love magnified her danger.
He sprang toward her with a low
cry of horror, tore off the blazing
scarf, aud folded her in his arms.
Her forehead, with its curls of hair
soft as floss silk, touched his lips.
Before he knew what he was doing he
was kissing the white forehead kiss
ing the sweet scarlet lips, and crying
out from the depths of his heart:
FARMERS' ALLIANCE, LINCOLN. XER,
"Oh, my darling! mr darline!
hue clung to Mm ho was sure of
that, and lkavtn knows how
he
would have gone on, but jnst then
there was a step in the hall and Frank
turned his head lust in time to see
Bertha Stanhope's azure dress steal
ing softly alter her up the broad
staircase. He felt sure that she had
witnessed the whole scene; but be
would not pain Agnes by telling her.
He went away abruptly he would
call agaid the next evening, he said at
leaving.
lhat night Bertha Stanhope did not
sieep. aii nignt long sue sat in a
chair by tho window and thought.
liut in the morning she was down to
'iiwRiivib miming aint ilcnil ever.
Agnes thought she had never seen her
eyes so bright and her cheeks so fine
with color.
After the meol was over she asked
Agnes to walk. It was such a splendid
morning and, she said thev should
enjoy it immensely.
Agnes assented. Uert ha chose the i
path. They wouM co down to eacle
Cliff the great headland which over
hung the sea just beyond the harbor.
J eal followed them invited to do
so by a gesture of hie mistress.
Agnes stood very near the edge of
the precipice, and looked over, shud
dering.
" hat a fearful depth! It would
be death to fall over there!" she said.
drawing back, nnd glancing up for
Berthas answer she saw that the
girl's face was livid, and that she wa
slinking like one in a fit.
Still her will was steady.
''Teal," sho said, concentrating her
gaze on the dog, "this girl has wronged
your mistress. Cast heroverthe clill!"
As she spoke shepointeddownward.
and the great beast understood her at
once.
He sprang toward Agnes with greedy
eyes, and seized her by Iheshoulder.
"Oh. mercy! mercy! cried the poor
little victim. "Bertha, forGod's sake
do not let him kill me thus!"
And still Bertha pointed downward.
and added, in the same hoarse voice;
"Teal, obey me!"
The dog renewed his hold, and
dragged the helpless girl forward
nnd simultaneously the sharp report
of a rille rang through the air, and
Teal leaped upward his hot blood
spurting in the face of Agnes. He ut
tered one wail, terrible in its dread
pain and despair, and tumbled help
lessly over the cliff.
"My God!"said Bertha, "lam lost!"
Frank Tremaine parted the foliage
close by, and rifle in hand emerged up
on the scene.
"Do your worst!" Bertha said defi
antly.
lie folded his arms and looked nt
her, sorrow and pity on his counte
nance. Then he turned to Agnes.
Love and denpair, but love, beautiful
and triumphant, over all.
Jiertha saw and understood. She
glanced up at tho sky above, and
down at tho terrible abyss below. All
fear and indecision went out of her
face.
"Agnes," she said, "forgive me the
wrong 1 meant to do. And thus I
nwko you recompense you and him!"
Ono moment she stood on tho verge
of the precipice, tho next she vanished
from tho sight of the two horrified
beholders; and they did not dare look
over.
'.Veil, after the grass haa grown
green two years over Bertha Stan
hope's grave Frank Tremaine and
Agnes were married.
It has been a happy union, but I
cannot help thinking that there is a
shadow over their lives when they re
member Bertha's tragic end.
MONKEYS AND TROCHES.
The Aspiring- Simian Not to Be Out
done.
As I was lingering before the monkey
cage in the Dresden Zoological Garden,
a slight tickling in the throat, a chron
ic trouble with me, induced me to take
out of my pocket a box of bronchial
troches, and to put one of tneni in my
mouth. Instantly a large monkey, of
manifestly aspiring nature, thrust out
his hairy arm and palm with a be
seeching look that 1 would give him
one. Why should he, too, not be al
lowed to enlarge his terrestrial exper
iences and share the joys of the super
ior being before him? So I gave him
a troche, which he at once clapped in
his
cnecK. ?eareeiy did the bitter
taste strike him than he snatched it
out with his fingers nnd began rubbing
it violently on the hair of his arm, as
if to rub off the bad taste. Seeing,
however, that the superior being con
tinued to suck his troche serenely, ho
soon put his own back in his chops,
to give it a fuller trial. It proved too
much for him to stand very long, and
so out- he pulled it a second time and
began rubbing it on the sanded floor
otthecago. Over and over the pro
cess was repeated; but each time ns
his reverential eye fell on the superior
being outside, still peacefully sucking
his own. a rcllective expression camo
over his face which as much as said,
'Surely if that manifest god out there
enjoys this nasty thing there must be
some desirable quality in it that I am
not developed enough to appreciate.'
So patient ly the aspiring simian went
on t ill he had dissolved the Inst parti
cle of his troche." Boston Herald.
Curious Story of a Picture.
There is a very curious story con
nected with one of the pictures in the
famous collection at Went wort h
Woodhouse, Lord Fitzwilliam's beau
titul mansion. The picture is of a
famous racehorse, named "Whistle
jacket," and the curious thing about
it is that it has no back ground.
When tho picture of the horse was
finished, someone suggested that a
portrait of Georgo the Fourth might
be placed in the saddle, and a land
scape added, but before this was done
Whistlejacket wasbrought to be com-
Eared with the p'cture, and to every
ody's astonishment, attacked his
counterfeit presentment so savagely
that it was nearly destroyed. The in- hecarefully closed his left optic and cot
. .i. s ... . , i i . .
cident was deemed so curious that
the unfinished picture was hung as it
was, saus background or King George,
and so remains to this day.
A Tempting Bait.
Materfamilias: 'Mr. Ciboulet would
make an excellent match for our Hen
riette, by what means could we get
him to favor us with his company a
little oftner. do you think?"
Eldest Son: '.0h! that's easy
enough. I'll borrow pOO francs from
him, then hawill not fiiil t6 call every
day for the money." Le Masque de
Fer.
I CPIQUC (V Ttrr.TTTn
; PRODUCTIONS OF PROFESSION-
AU HUMORISTS.
Humorous Incidents, Witty ?ay.
Inge and Fun or all Kinds
Read Them Before They Ba
coma Chestnuts.
Hla Poem did not Read Right.
An editor was sitting in his office
one day when a man entered whose
I brow was clothed with thunder.
I Fiercely seizing a chair, he slammed
his
hat on the table, hurled his
umbrella on the floor and sat down.
"Are you the editor?" he asked.
"Yes."
"Can you read writing?"
"Of course."
"Read that," he said, thrusting at
the editor an envelope with an in
scription on it.
"B , said the editor trying to
spell it.
"That's not a 'B,' it's an 'S,' " said
the man.
" 'S? Oh, yes, I see. Well, it looks
like 'Sal for Dinner,' or 'Souls of Sin
ners,' " said the editor.
"No, sir," replied the man; "noth
ing of the sort. That's mv name
Samuel Bruner. I knew you couldn't
reaa. I called to see about that
poem of mine you printed the other
uay, entitled "llie fturceose of bor
row.'" "I don't remember it," said the
editor.
"Of course you don't, becanse it
went into the paper under the villain
ous title of 'Smeareaso To-morrow.' "
"A blunder of the printer, I suppose?"
"Yes, sir: and that's what I want
to see you about. The way in which
that poem was niultilated was simply
scandalous. I haven't slept a night
sinco. It exposed me to derision,
People think I am an ass, The editor
coughed. Iiet me show you. The
first line, when I wrote it, read this
way: "Lying by a weeping willow,
underneath a gentle slope.' That
is beautiful and poetic. Now, how,
did your vile sheet represent it to
the public? 'ljying to a weeping wid
ow I induced her to elope.' 'Weeping
widow mind you. A widow! Oh,
thunder nnd lighting, that is too
much! But look at the fourth verse.
Thnt'e worse yet. Cast thy pearls
before swine and lose them in the dirt.'
Ho makes' it to read this fashion;
"Cart thy pills before sunrise and
love them it they hurt.' Now isn't
that a cold-blooded outrage on a
man's feeling's?"
"It's hard, very hard," said tho ed
itor. "Then take the fifth verse. In the
original manuscript it said, as plain
as daylight: 'Take away the gingling
money; it is only glittering dross.' In
its printed form you made me say:
'Tako away the tingling honey; put
some flies in for the boss.' By George!
I feel like attacking somebody with
yon fireshovel! But, oh! look at the
sixth verse. I wrote: 'I'm weary of
the tossing of the oceaD as it heaves.'
When I opened your paper and saw
the lines transformed into: 'I'm
wearing out my trousers till they're
open at the knees,' I thought thit
was taking it an inch too far. I have
a right to murder the compositor.
Where is he?"
"lie is out just now," said the editor.
"Come in tomorrow."
"i will," said the poet; "and I will
come armed." Yankee Blade.
The Man With a Bite.
A man sat on tno end of a bench in
Battery park with his left hand band
aged up, and I was about to ask him
the cause when a man and his wife,
who were sight-seeing and waiting for
tho boat on tho Liberty route, stop
ped to question him.
"I was bitten on the hand by adog,"
ho replied to their query.
"Not a mad dog?" asked the
woman.
"Yes'm. He was suffering with hy
drophobia the wotst way."
"By George!" exclaimed the hus
band, "reg'lnr mad dog, eh?"
"Yes, sir."
"Henry, give him 10 cents," said
the wo man. "Here, I've got two nic
kels myself. How did the dog come
to bite you?"
"It was in a park up town, ma'am.
Some children were playing near where
I sat, and the dog was making for
them. I grabbed him and he bit
mo."
"Just jumped right out and grabbed
him, eh?" asked the husband,
"Yes."
"And saved fliose innocent children!"
added tlin wifo "Hm' nnnlliii.
! nickel!"
I "Was the dog frothing?" asked the
husband.
"Very bad, sir."
"Eyes like balls of fire?"
"Yes."
"Wall, here's lOeentsmore. Did he
git away after he bit you?"
"No, sir. I threw him down and
choked him to dmth."
"By George! 'Hear that, Hanner?
Here's another nickel. He'd make nn
ail-tired plucky constable, he would!
Any danger of you're running mad?"
"I'm afraid there is, sir. This is the
ninth day, and I felt like barking a
few minutes ago."
"Did eh! Hear that Hanner? Wall,
we'll have to be going. We want to
ketch that boat. If you should run
mad while we are around here "
"There'd be no danger to you, sir.
I'd remember how kind you were to a
suffering man."
They were rather hurried in thir
gait and thev headed for the dock, and
when they had gone I slid along up to
the man and asked:
"In case you should run mad
do yon wish me to write the
particulars to your poor old
mother, or don't you want her to
know how you suffered and died?"
"I d rather you d spare her sir," as
up and wandered away to find an in
vestment for his capital. M. Quad in
New York Evening World.
Didn't Come Around.
"See here, waiter," said a guest at
a Western hotel in a new and strug
gling town, "haven't you got any milk
for this coffee?"
"No, sir," replied tho waiter affa
bly, "the milkman didn't coiae around
this morning,"
"I don't see any bread.';
"No, the bread man didn't come
around."
THURSDAY, NOV. 5.
"Can't you give me some iced tea?
"Well, no, the tact is the ice man
didn't rome around."
"I don't see any meat on the table;
nothing but fried catfish."
"No, catfish is the best we can do.
The meat man didn't come around."
"Well, who in thunder did come
around? There isn't enough to eat
on this table tobanquet a squirrel."
"There was a cabbage man around
yesterday, and if you can wait I'll
try and fix you up some cold slaw, or
if it isn't all gone, there is some dried
leef down in the cellar iu a nail keg."
Texas Sif tings.
Where Work Is Pleasant.
Neglected Wife "Why don't you go
to work?"
Husband, a ne'er-do-well, "I ain't
got no tools."
Neglected Wife "Deacon Smith of
fered you five dojlars to fix his fence,
and you have a saw, and a plane, and
a hammer, and nails. What more do
yon want?"
Husband "The saw nin't no good,
nnd I ain't got no file to sharpen it.
Ole Smith can fix his fence hisself."
Same Husband, ten years later,
"Hist! Say, wife. I've escaped from
the penitentiary. Gimme some other
clothes, so I kin light out agin."
Y ife "My, my! How did you get
out?"
Husband I dug forty feet under
ground with a trto--tined fork, and
then cut my way through two feet of
stone wnll and ten inches of boiler
iron with a saw made out of a tin
dinner plate. Good Nows.
A Friend's Opinion.
Hammerer I'll have to get a new
piano. My old ore is all worn out,
The action is too uneven."
Hardhead "The action! What's
that?"
Hammerer "I mean some of the
keys go down too hard and some too
easy. 1 became accustomed to it, and
then when I play on a new pis no in
some ono else's house I hit some kevs
t oo hard and others not hard enough.
Understand?"
Hardhead "I see."
Hammerer "Well, the unexpected
sounds startle me so that I forget the
notes and get thrown out."
Hardhead "Well, I think that's
pretty rough. They might tell you to
stop, or hit you with a chair-leg, or
something, but I don't think they
ought to throw you out." -New York
Weekly.
He Cave His Offering
A Boston newspaper reports a rath
er amusing scene in an open horse car.
The conductor had collected his fares
and returned to his station upon the
rear platform, when one of thepassen
gers mt his seat and took another
nearer the front. The conductor was
presumably on the lookout for pass
engers, and when his gazo reverted to
the car, he saw, as he thought, a new
man in one of the forward seats. Ho
proceeded at once to collect the fare
and tapped thegen'leman courteously
on the shoulder. "This is a one-cent
piece," said the oflit'ial. "Yes," an
swered the passenger, "I know it. I
paid my fare when I was in the other
seat. This time I supposed you were !
taKing up a collection." i'hiladelphia
.Ledger.
A Sad Accident,
Clara, just arriving at Narragansett,
What kind of a time have you been
having, Marie?
Marie Oh, I should have had a per
fectly lovely time if I had not met
with an accident the very lirst even
ing I came.
Clara, surprised, Whv. Marie. I
hadn't heard of it! What was it?
Marie Harry proposed to mo.
Clara-You don't call that an
accident, do you?
Marie, hesitatingly, No, not exact
ly, but I accepted him and he has
been here ever since. Truth.
A Fatal Profession.
'Well, Mr. Smytho, you've passed
your examination very satisfactorily,
out stay wnac is your protession?"
asked the insurance company man.
"lam er er anoet'said Smvtho.
blushing.
"Oh; and do you take or send your
poems?"
"I usually call with them." said tlin
rnvmster.
In that, rase, Mr. Smvthe." said
the official, shutting his book with a
snap, "we surely shouldn't think of
insuring your life! Good morning!"
At the tmperial Palace.
The Czarina Whatoff worries you,
my darlimjsky?
The Czar Enonghovitch. My pig
of a Prime Minister has mislaid by
bomb proof blnzeroff, and I can't go
to the ball gnmeovituh.
"But, sweetolTsky, can't you find
some other diversionovitch."
"Yes, light of my heartsoff. I shall
order a hundred offenders to the Si
berian mineskys." fittsbnrg Bullc
tin.
Safer Than any Safe.
VYishlets These summer resorts are
so full of all kinds of crooks, that, for
fear of being robbed, Ialwaysleavemy
iimiiey m me nocei sale,
liishlets I have a r.mch hettev
plan.
"What is it?"
"My wife carries the boodle in hf
dress pocket. Brooklyn Eagle.
A Moan Man. j
unite That man Brown is telling
all sorts of scandalous stories about
me.
Ureen Oh, I wouldn t mind about
that, White. No ono will believe them,
you know.
"Yes, but confound him. most nf
the things he tells are true." Somer
ville Journal.
The Choice of Evils.
lie u e shall never be able to
back to the hotel before nightfall.
get
She-
JAsar me, how improper it will
be!
"There is only one way out of
It,
ana t hat is for us to be engaged.
"Well, I think I prefer to lose my
reputation. New "iork Herald.
Something Ho Could Match,
Mrs. Pendergrast, in disgust You
call these shades alike! Is there any
thing you ean match?
Mr. Pendergrast Yes. Pennies.
Kate Field's Washington.
All
"Nature never
run to waist."
Waist.
allows anything to
"Humph! You've never seen a Ver
mont girl of forty." Truth.
1891.
OBTAIN . CHICAGO -. PRICES -. FOR -. YOUR
PEODUCE.
nil? . t0P J0" Butter, Poultry, Eggs, Veal,
nfil'n ci?.1!?; oo1. ides- Bears- Broom Corn XZeen and
Dried Fruits- Vegetables, or anytaiug you i.v to us. The fact that you
may have been seluog tmw articles at home for years, is no reason that you
shou.U TORtioue to do so. if yeu can find a better market. We mrke a swecialty
nrnl.V'h''hln,?nt8directin, FARMERS AND PRODUCERS. an3
probably have the latest trade in t!i wvnf ni hnn : r.L..T umu
I , . " , - , J J u lull ? UllBb
you are looking around for the cheapest market in which to buy your eoods. and
thm economizing in thst w it will ortiniir . J Jr " .
the best and most profitable way of disposiDsr of your produce. We invite cor
respondence from INDIVIDUALS. ALLIANCES. CLtlRS nJ fl " ' "iT
sire to -ship their produce direct to this nnrket. If rq zested, wt will send tou
free of charge our daily market report, shipping directions and such i iformation
as will be ofserricetoyou. if you contemplate shipping. When so requested
proceed for shipments will be deposited to the credit of the shipper with any
wholesale house in Chicsgo. Let us hear from you. n-3m
Summers, Morrison & Co.,
COMMISSION MERCHANTS 175 South Water St., CHICAGO,
Rafercnce: Metropolitan Natlooal Hank, Chicago.
FARMERS !
YATES
m m $3.11
Solid, Whole
Name and price stamped on every
Boot Evidence of faith in the
quality of the goods.
G.
1129
O Street.
C. W. LYMAN,
WHOLESALE '-.LUMBER '-.AND '-.COAL
Special Rates to Farmers'
Rooms 17 and 18 Montgomery
Corner 11th and N
DO YOU 61SE GATES?
EUREKA TUBULAR GAT
GttReKs Gate Company,
WATERLOO, IOWA.
v-- -I
' 1 1 1 1 1 1 ,
TIic Best and Cheapest Gate
The above out gows tho ordinary 10 foot gats. Tiey are eIbo mafe 12 and J4 feet
Wi2e to admit binder?, eto.
Praoiical tc sti muds during tbe rast fonr ywra has proved the Enrtki anterior to anv
gate made Notice the ro.lowinjr pciits of superiority :
STEESOTH The frame is mad9 of wrought
(toe en-) as to give (treat strenclh and resisting
in the werld.
LIGHTNESS Th9 entire fell sized gate ccmp'.ete only weighs fifty pounds, and swinn
oa its hin?es at the slightest t uch.
CURABILITY B sing ail iron and steel, it is praotically lndotraotable.
EASE OF GETTING UP Tne eye b jits and nute are all fnrnhhed coiplote. also the fhatn.
hook ard staples to fasten tegatc Al! the fitm.9r has toiioia to pi ice ha gate posts the
piopwr uiiuidci Hp.iri, ocre a nan mca noie lortae mngo ooits ana screw nn.
r3EF0LHE:S They are especially adapted fcr tss with 7ire fenes;"catch no snow in
winter, are not aiTtoted by tie wind, and beiag so ligit they can bo readily plaoad wheie most
needd.
CHEAPNESS There is no other Rite posso-sing alllhe qnalitie3 that this one do'i thai
can be sold fcr the sama raoiey.
THOUSANDS of taeso gites nre in use in Iowa, and throughout the eastern states. FlaS.
tsrinsj indorsement received !r:m
Farmers, Stockmen, Railroad Companies and All Others
Using Them.
A number of
different styles made
purposes.
Order a SamplsGafe and You will Use no Other.
J. W. HARTLEY, ALLIANCE STATE AGENT HAS XASE AESANOEMENTS FOE SELL.
IHO THESE GATES DIRECT TO MEMBERS OF THE
ALLIANCE AT FACIOST PRICES.
For Circulars, Prlci Lists and Full Information, Call on or Writs ti
J . XV. TTATlTIiEY, State Agout,
LrNOOTjKr, WBBRAHtt
Or to the EUREKA GATE CO, Wattrls low,
BUY
BROS.,
99
Stock Kip Boots.
YATES,
1129.
Alliance In Car Lots.
tf
Bl'k.
Write for Prices
St., Lincoln, Neb.
Ever Placed on the Market.
iron tnbo 1 1-2 inches in diameter, to braced
aualitiej. It is ilia Bt.ffts: and stronBst vat
suitable for all