DIDN'T SEEM TO WORK OUf
HIS NAME MOST APPROPRIATE
Dbg Owner's Idea Bright Enough,
but Somehow Her Memory Got
Twisted.
To Miss Bounce, who knows noth
ing whatever about dogs and can
scarcely tell a greyhound from a St.
Bernard, Mr. Kennell presented a fine
young Airdale terrier. He was ex
tremely wide awake and active, even
for a pup, and the young lady was
kept constantly on the alert, to pre
vent his getting Into mischief or run
ning into danger. Casting about in
her mind for a suitable name for this
restless animal Miss Bounce remem
bered that in her school days she had
learned In her philosophy that "wind
is air in motion." What more ap
propriate name, then, for the young
Airdale than Wind. So Wind he was
called. His name, thought Miss
Bounce, also will aid me memonically
to remember the name of the species
t which he belongs.
"What k'rid of a dog Is that pup of
your,s?" asked some one a few weeks
after the christening.
Miss Bounce's eyes roved anxiously
for an instant, but steadied them
selves directly as she 'replied with
serene confidence, "He is a Wind
Hound."
HE WAS A DANGEROUS RISK
In These Rushing Days the Pedes
trian Has No Show at All With
Insurance Company.
Here was a case where it seemed
as if everything was settled. The In
surance company's doctor had report
ed that the man seemed to be all
right, and the man himself had certi
fied that he was not engaged in any
dangerous occupation.
"I lead a sedentary life," he told
them. "I work in an office and we
have no danger or excitement."
"How about sports?" the examiner
asked. "Do you football? Baseball?
Do you box? Do you belong to an
athletic club?"
"No none of that stuff. I guess
I'm a safe risk."
"Do you scorch?"
"What do you mean?"
"Do you drive your car faster than
the speed limit?"
"I have no car."
"What? How do you gtt about?"
"I walk."
"Risk refused. A scorcher Is a
dangerous risk, but a pedestrian has
no chance at all. Buy a car, old chap.
Sorry good night!"
Ancient Painters.
Among the Greeks the most famous
painters were Cimon of Cleona. Poly
grotus, Zeuxis, Apellas, Appollodorus
and Parrhasius. Of these the greatest
were, Zeuxis, who is said to have
laughed himself to death over the pic
ture of an old woman that he had
painted, and Apelles, who. according
to some accounts, painted cherries so
perfectly that the birds pecked at
them, thinking them real. Apelles
was a contemporary of Alexander the
Great, and was commanded by the
conqueror of the world to paint his
picture. His greatest work was
"Venus Rising From the Sea." painted
for the Temple of Esculapius, at Cos.
and costing, it is said, over $100,000.
It is claimed that no artist was able
to complete his unfinished pictures,
many of which he left at the time of
his death.
Evil In Neglected Legislation.
Ia Belgium, where education Is not
compulsory, 21 per cent, of the work
ing people over ten years of age can
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"Knapp" It Was and Drowsy Dele
gate Proceeded to Live Up to
Cognomen. "
During the morning prior to the
opening of the national convention, a
special meeting of those delegates al
ready arrived was held to discuss and
vote on some preliminary measures
These met in a smaller hall, opposite
the convention hall; and when they
were all assembled in the stuffy room,
one of the members leaned back wear
ily in his chair and promptly fell
asleep.
After an hour's session, the chair
man called a vote on a certain meas
ure. All responded but the sleeper,
whose snores now and then echoed
through the room.
"Here! wake that man up!". . de
manded the chairman, at this point.
"What's his name, anyway?"
No one being able to tell, and no
one following the chairman's order to
wake the sleeper up, that functionary
at once called upon a ballot .clerk to
carry out the order. So accordingly
the clerk hurried down the aisle to
the dozer, shook him vigorously by
the 'arm, asking him his name the
while.
With a broken snore tha perforat
es the atmosphere, the sleeper awoke.
"What's his name?" again called out
the impatient chairman.
At this, the clerk straightened up
from the unknown member's chair,
and announced, to the accompaniment '
of a roar of laughter.
"Mr. chairman, he says his name la
Knapp." Judge's Library.
AND READY TO FIGHT AGAIN
Cat Refused to Be a Party to Pro
ceeding by Which She Offi
cially Died. -
Jerry the pet cat of the Stolz fam
ily of Bloomfleld, N. J., considerably
Btartled its mistress when, ; the .other .
afternoon, it appeared at the .kitchen
door after having been buried as dead
during the course of the preceding fore
noon. Jerry is of a warlike disposi
tion, and during a recent combat, sus
tained such injuries that the family
decided to put him out of misery. Ac
cordingly the garbage man was pre
vailed on to place the pet animal in
an old tin boiler, pour in chloroform
and put on the lid. In a few min
utes Jerry was "dead." He was bur
ied and the Stolz children covered the
grave of their " friend and playmate
with flowers. But life to Jerry was
sweet, so when Mrs. Stolz opened th
kitchen door later, she found him
waiting for admittance. Mrs Stoli
screamed and ran, but her husband
let the cat in, and declared he would
not permit the warrior to be "killed"
again.
Up-to-Date Street Beggars.
"Even your street beggars are up to
date heie in New York," said an ob
serving out-of-town man as he tossed
a nickel into the ha of a professional
beggar wearing a badge "Victim of
the Recent Fire." "I've never known it
to fail," he continued, "that after a
fire, an explosion or any other big
accident there was a noticeable change
in the appeals made by your street
beggars. Another thing, note h ia
shrewdness, as he doesn't specify any
particular fire, but simply the. rt-ft-t
fire. The desire to keep abreast of
the times seems to be deep seated -in
all New Yorkers, and just after i-cm
great accident the street beggars ar
sure to make the most of the situ:'.1 ion
and make their appeal to the puLiic
along the latest lines."
neither real nor writ.