Wee Willie McCorniick looks gooder
every day. He covers a world of terri
tory in the left dandelion patch, slams
the ball like a hobo hitting a back door
for a handout, and runs bases like a
streak. Our only fear of Wilile is that a
slight breeze will some day waft his
fragile form out of the lot. We'd hate
mightily to lose the opportunity of hand
ing the lad his salary check every now
and then.
Some of the flashes of wit in the grand
stand are bully but usually it is the en
vironment and the psychological moment
that makes 'em dazzle. Last Tuesday a
bunch of Omaha rooters occupied a sec
tion of the stand, and one leather-lunged
member of the squad would yell, "It was
a good one, too," every time Kneeland
called a strike on an Antelope. A little
later Kneeland made" a close decision
against the Omahans, and immediately
the leather-lunged one yelled, "Kneelanti.O
you're rotten!" "Yes, and he's a good
one, too!" shot back a Lincoln man in
the lower row. After the din had sub
sided when Lincoln pushed across the
winning run last Tuesday, a barber fan
of Lincoln arose, looked the Omaha root
ing squad over for a minute and then re
marked : "They'd have to pay me 35 cents
apiece for shaves, if they kept their faces
that long."
WHERE'S THE CONNECTIONS?
Lincoln's return to the side of the sa
loon and her increased republican ma
jority at the same time, will leave our
county option republican friends in a po
sition where explanations will be in or
der, and the greater part of the explana
tions will hardly reach the point
Osceola Democrat.
We confess our inability to see any
connection between Lincoln's decision on
the excise question and the county option
policy of the g. o. p. in Nebraska. Not all
advocates of county option are "drys" by
any means, and not all opponents of
county option are "wets." We are per
sonally acquainted with several advo
cates of county option who invariably
vote "wet," and we know one opponent
of county option who invariably votes
"dry." If any explanations are due from
anybody they are due from the 1,200 men
of Lincoln who, while pretending to be
opposed to the open saloon, "forgot',' to
vote on Tuesday of last week. Their ex
planations are the ones that will have a
hard time reaching the point.
HERE'S A WARM ONE.
The bluff that the Dahlmanites in the
legislature made at moving the state
capital away from Lincoln had the de
sired effect on the city election. About
a thousand prohibitionists were so badly
scared that they forgot to go to the polls.
It is noticeable that even a dry enthusiast
will hesitate to vote when it may cause
a loss to his pocketbook. Only a few re
formers have a conscience that is over
skin deep. Falls City Journal.
PHILOSOPHY
"ONLY A PRINTER."
Only a printer! His finger tips
Gives voice again to long dead lips.
And from a past and hoary age.
Recall the words of seer and sage,
No printer he
Bui line by line he tells the tale
That color gives to canvas pale,
And masters old before us stand
With brush and pallette clasped in hand
So we- may see.
With patient toil while others sleep
He makes the ages backward creep .
And knights in armor ride and fight
"For God, my ladie and the right."
No player he
But by the magic of his hands
The curtain rises in all lands,
And actors for a season rage
Their few brief hours upon the stage
So Ave may see.
Only a printer! His magic trade
Hath all earth's scenes before us laid,
He moves his well trained hands, and lo,
The word with knowledge is aglow.
Magician he
Behind the scenes he works his spel'.
With signs and symbols truth to tell
And bv the magic of his art
The future's curtains draw apart
So we may see.
Only a printer ! His magic spell
Preserves earth's sweetest story well,
Of how, on Calvary's cruel tree
The Savior died to make men free.
A prophet he
For by his art he makes the book
Wherein the weary soul may look,
And looking, find the promise blest
Of home and love and endless rest- -
Eternity.
Will M. Maupin, in The Inland
Printer.
Gifts without sacrifice cannot be
classed as charity.
Charity is offered as an excuse for a
multitude of sins.
Too many people wear themselves out
trying to escape work.
It is unchristian to find-fault with any
thing that makes men better.
A square meal is the first step in the
conversion of a starving sinner.
If we could cure faults as easily as
we find them, what a perfect world this
would be.
About half of the things brought on
credit would not be bought if cash were
demanded.
. IT CAME FORWARD.
The quiet striker stepped towards
the non-unionist who had taken his
plnce and said:
''Pardon me, but. may I have a 'ew
Tiiiuute conversation with "
"Come right along with me!" shoUed
a deputy marsUis'i, grabbing the striker
BY THE WAYSIDE
by the arm. "You've violated Judge
Skinem's injunction.
Whereupon the guilty striker was
haled before Judge Skinem.
"What have you to say, sir?" demand
ed the incensed judge.
"Your honor, I merely "
"Shut up ! What right have you to ad
dress the court?"
"But, your honor, I "
"Silence, sir. I ordered you and your
kind not to speak to, address, communi
cate with or look at these non-unionists.
You have violated the order. To jail you
go for thirty days for contempt."
"Your honor, I but exercised my con
stitutional right of free speech."
"That means thirty days more for you.
It is the rankest kind of contempt for
one of your kind to mention the coasti
tution in my presence."
So saying, the judge took a special
car provided by a railroad company and
went off on a hunting trip.
The humble workingman went to jail.
WHAT THE OFFICE BOY SAYS.
De guy w'ot's alius lookin' f'r de w..st
us it genrully finds it.
Folks, w'ot ain't -got no kids is g;n
rully mighty intrusted in tellin' lem
Av'ot has, how t' keer f'r 'em.
I ain't much on de question o' soshiol
ogy, but it strikes me dat de fust t'ing t'
do in solvin' de question o' savin' de
woikin' goils is ti pay 'em living woiges.
Eturnity ain't got much scare in it f'r
de guy w'ot's up ag'inst a mighty hun
gry present.
De woist t'ing about de saloons is de
hypocrites dat make 'em possible.
It's purty hard, I reckon, t' save de
soul dat's in a body wid a stomach dat is
mighty sort on grub.
Course de laws is made f'r de rich an'
poor alike. De trouble is dat dey ain't
applied alike.
De wise lawyer ain't alius tellin' his
client w'ot he can't do; he is tellin' him
w'ot he can do widout getting ketched.
De poorest man I know ain't got a
durned thing t' his name but dollars.
When a guy has done his durndest he's
entitled t' all de crdit dere is.
THE REASON.
"How did Schreechorly succeed in his
efforts to cultivate his voice?"
"He scored a failure."
"How was that?"
"He irrigated it too much."