his friend squarely in the eye and then
shquted:
"Go read your country's history, sir; read
your country's history!"
Then the machine began humming again.
A marked copy of this paper the mark
around this true story had been sent to
Major General Frederick Dent Grant, U.
S. A.
Looks Dangerous.
Secretary Whitten of the Commercial club
received a'letter the other day addressed to
him at "lincoln, nebraska."
"That's the first real evidence of anything
in this capital removal business that I have
seen," remarked the secretary as he filed the
letter away.
Qualified.
The motorman of a South Seventeenth
car took the curve at H street at high speed,
and a lady preparing to alight was thrown
violently across the car and landed in the
lay of L. W. Garoutte, who caught her
neatly.
"I'm not exactly onto that motorman's
curves yet," remarked Garoutte, "but I seem
to be catching him all right."
The Correct Pronunciation.
Mr. Murray, the advertising manager of
the Beatrice Creamery Co., is a southerner,
and of course prefers New Orleans as the
place for the Panama canal exposition.
"I want the Crescent City selected for
many reasons," said Mr. Murray the other
day, "but I insist that my friends get the
right pronunciation. I always have to pause
and think what city they refer to when
they say 'New Orleans.' Then it dawns
upon me that they mean N'O'leans."
It All Depends.
"I want to go to Kansas City the worst
way," exclaimed an excited men to "Bob"
McGinnis of the Northwestern the other
day.
"Bob's" reply is in doubt. If you ask
George V. Bonnell you'll get one answer,
and if you ask Fred Cornell you'll get an
other. -
Superlative Degree.
"Money is a little tight these days," re
marked Will Ryons the other day.
"Tight!" exclaimed a man who was try
ing to negotiate a loan. "It is absolutely and
completely intoxicated. T'ight,' isn't the
right word."
The Curse of Child Labor
The third among the reasons that caused
the Pilgrim Fathers to leave their tempor
ary refuge in Holland and adventure to the
New World, according to pious Nathaniel
Morton's New England' Memorial, was this :
"That many of their children, through
the extreme necessity that was upon them,
although of the best dispositions and gra
ciously inclined, and willing to bear part of
-their parents' burdens, were oftentimes so
oppressed with their heavy labors, that . al
though their spirits were free and willing,
yet their bodies bowed under 'the weight
of the same and became decrepit in early
youth, and the vigor of nature was consumed
in the very bud."
"" After three hundred years there are still
some trades and localities in the" United
'. States where the vigor of nature . i& consumed
' in" the" very M, Saturday Evening 'Post.
COMING ALONG WITH THE DOPE
FOR THE LOVERS OF SPORT : : :
' Coming Along with the Sport Dope.
The mere fact that President Despain
tried to land "Red" Andreas as manager of
the Antelopes is an encouraging sign, even
if the attempt failed. It shows that Despain
is looking for a good one and willing to
pay the price. Andreas is not the best
player in the Western, but he can give 'em
all cards and spades on the "peppersauce"
game and beat 'em out. "Red" scraps fair,
but he never quits wiggling till the sun goes
down, and that's the sort of thing the "fans"
like.
Every regular patron of the game at An
telope park knows L. W. Garoutte, but how
many of them know that he one of the old
time baseball players? Look at his twisted
and gnarled fingers, the result of catching
the underhand pitchers of the late 70's and
early 80's. He broke into the game along
side Adrian C. Anson, with whom he played
in Iowa, and later around the country. Ga
routte can even now give some of the young
professionals pointers on how to engage
properly in the great national pastime.
"V :
If the management of the Salt Bottom,
Overflow and Capital Beach Electric Inter
urban railway will frame up some scheme
to better the Sunday service this coming sea
son, 'steen million baseball lunatics will re
joice and be exceeding glad. The chief frac
ture of Sunday during the summes cores
not from the ball games -it comes from the
language used by patrons of the game who
cannot afford to ride in automobiles.
If President Despain fails to land a
catcher in Art Kruger's class before the sea
son opens he might make a deal with Henry
T- Clarke jr., state railway comimssioner.
Clarke won international fame at catcher
of the Yale team a few years ago, and a
little practice would doubtless put him back
in the game. He's always at the park when
the umpire calls "play ball," and he might
be prevailed to do a stunt of backstopping
now and then.
' With Billy Fox on the Mobile team the
average is kept pretty fairly decent.
Every indication at the present time
points to a club that the Lincoln fans can
enthuse over. The pitching staff will be
stronger than last year, notwithstanding
.that Farthing, Giest and McGrath have been
sold. The list of wigglers consists of three
of the old standbys, Knapp, Hagerman and
Fox, while the new man, Applegate, is fully
up to their standard. Wolverton is by no
means a weak pitcher, but if he develops
in spring practice as he did in the short
time he was with the club last season he is
going to be a worthy successor to those who
have gone up higher. Pat aGllagher, the
semo-pro from Colorado and Smith and one
or two others will be a bunch of youngsters
who will even make the "old 'uns" go some
to hold their "obs. The catching department
will be well looked after by Krueger, whom
'Lincoln fans are willing to swear by, while
his co-partner will' be .Stratton, purchased
from Wheeling in the Central. This man
Stratton will. .without doubt be the sensation
of the. Western league in the backstopping
"department in all stunts with the possible
: exception of batting. He has a whip which
'drew' the' big' leagues11 attention' arid paused
him to go up in the big noise. He was sent
back for a little more experience, but they
did not re-purchase and the Lincoln club
drafted him last fell. If "Krueg" keeps up
the pace he settthe latter part of the season
with his big war club, it won't matter much
whether anybody else hits the ball or not.
The infield will be ably looked after next
year and there will be some new faces. Mis
ter John Thomas, whom the denizens of
Omaha are real mad at, will continue his
cavorting at the first corner and will in all
likelihood pull off a few cavorts this year,
as Jack feels good and is in better trim than
ever. His stunt at the Armstrong Clothing
company's emporium has put him in good
shape, and Bill Turner has agreed to wear a
wig this summer down in that bug box so
that Jack will not mistake his shining dome
for a bran new Victor. The second sack
well that position will probably be filled by
the new manager, who will be a comer from
Cometown. Shortstop position will be filled
by a good man, one probably from one of
the big league clubs, but there will be one
or two kiddos scrapping for that position
with him who will make things lively in the
competition to see who gets the job. Of
course Reliable Jim will prance around tht
third sack if his prancers are in good shape
this spring, which he says is a fact, but he,
too, will have to look out for there are ar
couple of fast kids from the bushes who look
awful good from a Ion gdistance view. The
: three of them will have to fight it out and
may the best man win. Out in the field,
Jude has gone. As the gentle summers
breezes waft in from the Gulf, the husky lit
tle Chippewa will be found doing things if
the outer garden for our old friend Duckey
Holmes, once the pride and joy of Lincoln'
bugdom. We will always remember Duckej
as the prophet who rescued a Western
league franchise from the swamps of Old
Mizzou and trundled it in a wheelbarrow to
our capital city, and here we are. The Hon
able Mister Paulander Cobb will again
gather daisies in the right field pasture,
where the big bull Durham browses during
the cool morning when the dew is on the
grass and wards off the home runs fired at
him in the afternoons by aspiring aspirant
for those fifty dollar checks. Mister Cole will
also be doing business out in the back pas
tures. That hole left vacant by the absenco
of Mister Jude at Mobile by the Sea will be
filled in good shape and there will be noth
ing doing this year but to watch the hig"n
flies go plunk into the waiting paws of the
left garden professor.
Few of the patrons of the game here in
Lincoln have much of an idea of the dis
heartening conditions which President Des
pain has faced during the past two "months.
Sickness has at four different times sent him
to his bed for a more or less extended period.
During these times the other fellows have
been doing business and the anxiety of the
president to get into the game and land some
of the good ones while they have been on
the bargain counter has been responsible fof
his continued illness. A couple of weeks
ago, however, he gave his physician a vaca
tion and since that time there has been
things doing at headquarters. During the
time of his illness he had a phone by his
bedside and continued to make the receipts
of the Lincoln postoffice bulge and the wires
Continued on page 10