The Plattsmoutn Journal
TL'BLISnEb WEEKLY AT
PLATTSMOUTH, NEBRASKA.
- -BY
GERMAIN E. TOWL,
Platts. Phone. 6. Neb. 'Phone, 220-
Entert-d at the postoffloe at riattsmoutli. Ne
braska, as second class matter.
FRIDAY, MAY 17, 1901.
A babe's smile is a proof of heaven"
says Bill Maupin but neglects even
through the medium of a to ex
plain of what is a baby's midnight
yell.
The season must be a little laek
warddownat Weeping Water. The
local merchants still devote half page
advertisements to exploiting the
merits of their heavy coats and clnaks
and "mitts."
The earnest student of public affairs
should not fail to read the Washington
letter in this Issue of the Journal Al
though brief it contains much food for
thought in its reference to the IJanna
presidential bxm and trade in the
rhilippines.
Tlic News received Unlay a consignment of
l.T.000 pounds of print paper.-Plattsmoutli
News.
Now, just think of what 13 ounces
of brain will do with all that 13,000
pounds of pure white paper!
When it comes to the matter of
streets we prefer sprinkling to immer
sions. The new street sprinklers lay
the du.st far more effectively than t lie
practice of flushing with the hose.the
latter being available fr much to
small an area.
Here's another itemized bill of costs
for Nebraska to pay. Of 112 enlisted
men in Co. I: :i'th infantry, but forty
seven returned alive, after a jear's
campaigning. The others are coming
lack to their families in rough, black
shrouded boxes.
riattsmoutli has in its schMls a
very etlicient young teacher quite in
appropriately named EmmaThrasher,
Jot corporal punishment is no longer
in vogue. Years ago when the Journal
man went to school the lady could
have had the pick of schools almost
anywhere on the qualification of her
name alone.
We have suffered from a vile and
nauseating escape of gas from one of
the mains alout town this week. But
this is of the illuminating sort, and
can be more easily home t nan that kind
which gushes from natural s pouters
and is neither illuminating nor in
structive, and impossible to check
without laying the main six feet under
ground.
one of the most attractive and woman
ly characters of recent fiction, comes
from an eastern Nebraska town not
very far removed from riattsmoutli.
Another of the cheerful idiot class
breaks loose in the Scientific American
with the query for the receipe for
building a simple motor to be attach
ed to the axles of a baby carriage. The
editor incisively replies that there is
no motor whose armature rotates as
slowly as the wheels of a baby car
riage if the armature of any exist
ing motor were attached to the axle
of a baby carriage the nurse would
need a trolley car to keep up with her
charge.
Missouri still holds to its record for
doing things queerly. Down in Saint
Clair county two of the county judges
are serving jail sentences for refusing
to obey the mandates of a federal judge
ordering the issuance of bonds. The
imprisoned judges are firm in their
determination and with the entire ap
proval and backing of their neighljors,
together with the fact that they are
being well paid for their time, it
would not be surprising if they served
their entire term of office in jail.
While President McKinley wades
knee deep in California roses,
his first cousin, years of age, penni
less, totally deaf, almost blind, is drag
ging his decrepit body about a Kansas
poor house, a despis! pauper, praying
for the blessed relief of death. So do
the high and the low, riches and pov
erty, pomp and penury, extreme of
magnificence, extreme of poverty
pitifully meet and mock, even through
consanguinity. It is one of the tenets
of our beautiful civilization that no
one is expected to care for his poor rel
atives if he can get the state to do it
for him. It is just that thing which
makes it pissible for Mr. McKinley to
achieve a distinction greater than that
of president simply to do the unex
pected thing by his poor old pauper
cousin dow n in that Kansas eleemosy
nary institution. That much any man
might do, for the sake of his name, at
least.
A NEBRASKA 1IEKOINE.
In Will Payne's novel, '-The Story
of Eva," there is a typical Nebraska
girl, whose hopeful and robust nature
counteracts the timidity and weakness
of her New England husband and fi
nally saves his character. Eva, w ho is
A Strange Malady.
A singular thing happened in this
county last week. The subjoined truly
humorous and meritorious literary
production was published in the Lou
isville Courier. On the same day the
same article, word for word with the
exception of the substitution of the
word Elmwood for Louisville,appeared
in the Elmwood Leader-Echo:
"An epidemic of most alarming
character has broken out in Louisville
since the advent of warm weather. It
seems confined principally to the fe
male portion of the community, al
though some of the males appear to
be attacked ny a sympathetic phase of
the disorder. In the case of the women
the primary symptoms are nervousness
and excitability, which are greatly ac
centuated by the sight or soap, water
and scrub brushes. As the malady
progresses, the victim passes into a
state of frenzy, marked by destructive
mania and a desire to tear up carpets,
take down curtains, move furniture,
and scrub everything in sight, under a
maniacal delusion that the house is
'scandalously dirty.' At this stage
the men Income atllieted with lowness
of spirits, eat in the woodshed, sleep
on the lloor, and finally take to the
woods. As the frenzy of the woman
increases she loses all control of her
self, Hies frantically at unoffending ar
ticles of furniture, races up and down
stairs and develops a strong tendency
to tie up her head in a towel. After
the malady begins to subside, the mus
cles relax and become limp, and severe
headache ensues, generally attended
by hysterics, followed by total collapse.
The" physicians pronounce the disease
'housecleania' and state that it dates
lack to very early times."
Many curious readers of both papers
have since been asking how it may
have come aUut, and have ventured
theories, all of which we have felt
compelled to reject.
The more one analyzes what might
seem a simple coincidence, the more
peculiar it appears. We do not be
lieve absolutely in telepathy. Even
with the development of the wireless
sort our faith iu the claims made for
mental telegraphy has not materially
appreciated. Coincidences are far too
infrequent to Ik? taken without ques
tion: therefore, we admit that this
strange occurrence leaves us somewhat
at sea. Here we have two articles,
identical word for word. Both were
published on the same day,but in w ide
ly removed parts of the county. Both
are the product." of two bright and vi
rile brains, for if they were not orig
inal, credit would havelren given the
author. Each apieared in the editor
ial columns of the respective papers.
Therefore each is undoubtedly the
fruit of the trenchant pens and lumi
nous brains of. the respective editors.
We do not lielieve that the novel
idea for so entertaining an article first
emanated through a leak from the in
tellect of one of the humorist laure
ates and then communicated itself
through either sensible or sub-con -scious
suggestion to the other humor
ist laureate.
The inspiration theory has Iteen
suggested, but to our temporarily an
alytical mood this presents a fatal Haw.
Inspiration is a sort of sub-conse'ous
vision. A vision is a dream, and
dreams depend largely upon what and
how much the victim eats for supper.
Now, it does not stand to reason that
there exist anywhere in the county
two women whose cooking is so rela
tively equal in wretchedness as to in
spire two men with one and the same
vision of "A Strange Malady." Be
sides, editors wives are invariably good
cooks speaking advisedly.
We put from us with a shudder the
suggestion of one who does not know
the profession, for both of the gentle
men in question are honorable men,
and either would as soon think of tak
ing your purse from your pocket as of
filching entire the finished product of
another man's brain, and passing it
upon a trusting public as his own.
So, we give it up. and adviseanxious
inquirers to ask either of the editor
men about it themselves.
Omaha on Trial.
The city of Omaha and the people
of Omaha are on trial in a unique and
novel cause. Before the grand tribu
nal of the leading municipalities of
the west, Omaha stands to prove the
justification of its claim to a distinct
ive foremost place among the progres
sive, hustling municipalities of this
decade.
At the same time ln-fore the same
open court of inquiry, according to the
manner in which the issue in hand is
met, will le everlastingly refuted or
permanently confirmed the oft repeat
ed charges of unprogresslveness, tar
diness to take advantage of natural, re
sources, neglect to improve great busi
nessopportunities.blindncss to the val
ue ot sultstantially and sufficiently en
couraging commercial enterprises,
astounding lack of municipal pride
and public spirit, parsimoniousness of
the private pocket-lxok in the face of
great public need, not to speak of the
the recent harsh jibe of a near by city
declaring that in Omaha a petrified
agglomeration of humanity distribut
ed through a pile of frowsy antiquity
call the net result a modern city.
The syllabus in this cause of action
is the building o the Auditorium.
Will Omaha push it through or allow
the project to drift unrealized into
history?
This is a "question which affects not
Omaha alone, but the whole of Neb
raska. Out in the state all eyes are
turned toward the great metropolis
of the queen state of the ves and all
who feel a deserved pride in their
state trust that its chief city may not
fail to uphold the rank and prestige
of that state among the other states.
If Omaha shows iiseit either unable
or unwilling once to do what even
Kansas City has twice done with ease,
and alacrity, the mortification of fail
ure and the sack-cloth and ashes of
humiliation will not be hers alone,but
all Nebraska will bear the shame.
Out here among the farms and in
the little towns there are ir any who
would gladly assist in a financial way
if it were considered either proper or
necessary, But it is neither. We
should feel the same shame in giving
that Omaha would feel in receiving
such aid. And surely the chief and
richest city of our thriving young
state need not depend upon eleemo
synary assistance for the completion
of one of its most needed public build
ings. It is not necessarily the biggest con
tributions that count the most. It is
not so much the money, but the man
ner of giving which will effect the
greatest results. The brick scheme is
an excellent one. The surprising thing
is that one does not see a little oblong
red ladge of public spirit wagging
from every coat lapel on the streets,
in the offices, stores and shops. Last
week a railway coach laden with dele
gates to a state convention came down
to Plattsmouth. In that crowd one
should have been able to gather enough
bricks to erect a miniature auditor
ium. There was one just one and
that one was worn by a woman.
The people of Omaha are all right.
They seem to be made of the right
stuff, but they need a little jinger ad
ministered to lest advantage some
times. For this there are no better
media than the newspapers. In this
matter, however, the B-e is slow and
conservative as usual. In the making
of senators there is no room for audit
oriums. The News is too busy rub
bing it into Mayor Moorcs. But there
still remains the World-Heral casting
out its ever-ready tow rope like a sav
ing life line, while its snappy, forceful
editorials are surely reanimating the
public spirit and organizing t he people j
in a great Kpular movement. With
out digressing, it might le remarked
that the World-Herald is a notably
efficient organizer, and in this effort
it is really a brick.
When one comes to think of it, every
Omahan ought to prize an auditorium
brick as a British soldier does a Victo
ria Cross. One is an indication of con
spicuous bravery, the other a conspic
uous indication of a laudable public
spirit. The red badge of courage may
be more difficult to obtain, but an aud
itorium brick should Ik? worn none the
less proudly by every one of the hund
red and one thousand" and the other
thousands which the census failed to
count.
All the eyes of the state, the eyes of
the cities of the middle and southwest
are upon Omaha. All expect great
things of her. Will she meet the is
sue squarely and vindicate our confi
dence iu her prestige and progressive
spirit? All Nebraska hopes so. The
exigency of the occasion demands it.
Rival cities may justly jeer if she does
not. But for us there will le nothing
but the blush of shame, w ith, perhaps,
the prayer that the Missouri river
may rise and create a new state line
just west of the corporate limits of
Omaha, and then may God save Iowa.
Endorses McBride.
It is a sad commentary on the liber
ality of the press when the public is
given an exhibition of how narrow and
blind partisan lolitics may make a
man, and especially an editor, who,
though lie may often be only a sort of
post graduate printer's devil, never
theless passes as a man also.
Last week the Nehawka Register, a
republican paper which evidently dares
speak out and give the news all the
time, printed the following article:
'L. J. Griffith journeyed to riatts
moutli Wednesday to take in theG.A.
R. Encampment. Upon his arrival
there he was taken in charge by J, 1).
McBride and promptly jailed. "He re
monstrated some at this unexpected
proceeding.inut beinga law resjecting
citizen he considered it his duty to
yield, which he did upon the promise
that he should not be confined below.
He wasn't, either. HegivesMc credit
for doing his simple duty in the case,
as he understood it, and entertains no
unkindly feelings toward him and his
estimable lady. In fact L. J. regards
Mc as the right man in the right place
and predicts that he will be nominated
and elected sheriff next fall."
The Register, fresh from the press,
arrived in the office of the riattsmoutli
News in the nick of time to satisfy a
long felt want for something to fill the
local pages. The News man clipped
the article entire with the
exception of the reference to
the satisfaction Deputy Sheriff Mc
Bride has given in his office, the hon
est testimonial of praise accorded him
by a frank and outspoken republican,
and the prediction of his nomination
and election to Hie office of sheriff of
(.'ass county. This was something that
stuck in the News man's political
craw, causing his partisanship to over
shadow his zeal to get the news. Con
sequently he printed only part of a
news item, and censored the real news
feature of the thing.that part in which
all readers would naturally be most
interested. Therefore he was unable
to print a news story without warp or
bias.
Nevertheless, the fact remains and
is generally recognized, the censorship
of the News to the contrary notwith
standing, that Deputy Sheriff McBride
is one of the most efficient, hardwork
ing and painstaking officers that this
county eer had in its service, and
that the people want nothing more
than a chance to show their apprecia
tion by electing him to the office
of sheriff. And thisopportu nity they
are likely to have this fall.
A Revolver Club
Artie Helps is attempting to organ
ize a revolver club for the purpose of
reviving proficiency in the use of that
most approved weapon of the South
ern gentleman and the western cow
No one is better qualified to pro
mote the idea, for in his younger days
Artie used to be known as Dead Shot
Dick. But it is denied that he furnish
ed (me of the heroes for one of Nick
Carter's most lurid phantasies for the
inflammation of the juvenile mind.
A revolver club would be a good
thing in many respects. All the local
surgeons applaud the scheme. John. P.
Sattler and Streight & Streight have
offered a substantial I minis to push
the enterprise along, but it is susect-
ed that the chief interest of all these
is entirely foreign to love of the simrt.
The Journal heartily endorses the
scheme and will co-operate in any wa
in its power to encourage and help so
laudable an undertaking, even to the
extent of offering large and valuable
prizes to the three members who can
run up the heaviest casualty lists from
among their fellow members. We
make this reservation, however, that
we shall refuse to accept to the credit
of any of the contestants the certif
icates of violent demise of any who
iiappen to lie Journal subscribers.
So let all whose fingers itch to toy
with the hair trigger of a 4." Colt's,
find surcease for their longing to per
forate jingling bulls-eyes and other
easy marks by enrolling their names
with Artie Helps and leaving explicit
directions with the tomb-stone man.
NOTICE TO TAX PAYERS.
The Hoard of County Commissioners
will sit at a Board of Equalization on
the 11th day of June lyol and continue
in session not less than eight days or
until the hearing of complaints
against assessments and such other
business as may legally come lefore it
has been finished. All persons having
complaints to make against assess
ment are notified to appear before said
Board at their office in the Court
Rouse at 1'Iattsuioiith.
JAM ES RO B E I ITS( ) N,
County Clerk
ED FITZGERALD
Is fullv cquipied with new stock, (
S . i : . . .1 r ... f
f new i mimics, etc.. aim can iiirnisii
( tlio nulilic with tirst. l:isi servffp.
5 Quick trips to all parts of county, i
c
STABLE SIXTH & VINE STREETS
003)
PXDGXDO00eCXDeSGS
Garden Seeds
both in Bulk and Packages.
lilue Grass and Lawn Seed.
SEED SWEET POTATOES.
tttt
It's time to think almut
your lawns, and high
"time to get to work at
your gardens. Every
one of our lines of seeds
tested and guaranteed.
AAA
Bennett &Tutt
THE GROCERS.
"EVKUYTHINO IX Skason."
GX-XS0CCX30
-NO HUNTING.
ALLOWED
ON THESE GROUNDS.
That's a sign 3011 often see on country places, but
you will never see it on this store.
I We want you to hunt
Over the entire town, then como here and you will
decide that
Our Dru$ IJpe i5 (Tore ?onpl
And our prices lower than can be found elsewhere.
Seeds
That 6row
Need Any?
See that they come from
The Nebraska Seed Go
OMAHA, NEBR.
Your Dealer Sells Them.
8
0S
JOS. F
WE ARE SHOWING
New - Styles
T11 footwear for the spring of MHJl.
If you are interested in proper foot
gear you will call and inspect the new
lines - men's, women's and children's.
We are the leaders iu shoe fashions
Spring and Summer Patterns
And goods just received
Latest Styles in Cutting
and Fitting.
WORK STRICTLY FIRST CLASS
HUDECEK & McELROY
Rockwood Block Plattsmouth. Neb.
B
auk Qt
8
ru
PLATTSMOUTH, NEBRASKA.
lEid a.p Capita,! ------- $50,000.
Office hours from 9 a. m. to 4 p. m.
Money to loan at current rates on approved security. Deposits received
on time certificates at the rate of 3 per cent per annum for six months, or
4 per cent for one year. Collections made and promptly remitted. Your
business, whether large or small, solicited.
Charles C. Farmele, President, J. M. Patterson, Vice President.
T. M. Patterson, Cashier.
..Cold Drinks on Hot Days..
Atwood's Pharmacy.
Prescriptions caref Tally compounded
Pure Drugs, nil leading Patent Medicines.
.Stationery, Cigars, Toilet Articles, H'all
Paper, If'iiulow Glass and Paints.
A. W. A X W O O D ,
South Side Main Street, Plattsmouth-
15)
UULa U
TILL CURED.
umm
vj UX1U1L
1
All diseases of the rectum treated on a positive Guarantee, and no money accepted on til
patient 1.1 cured. Bono' for from 104 pago 'took: a trr-atiea on rectal disease, and hundreds of
testimonial letters, valuable to anvonn aflictrd. Also our 43 pago book for memtn; botnaea
free. Address. Drs. THORNTON & MINOR, 10th & Oak Sts., KailMS City. MO;
4