SHARP POINTS.
People never tell the exact truth. J
Modesty will earn a man more than
ability.
As a rule, when a atory la funny. It
is not true. j
A picnic is not a success unless there '
Is pie to throw away.
Most people just drag along until It
is time for them to die.
A laugh 1b an awfully good bluff to
make when troubles appear.
A man never knows what la coming
until it gets right on to him.
There Is one thing to the credit of old
maids-; they accumulate no kin.'
When a man stops smoking, and be
gins again, he feels mighty sheepish.
A man with a future Isn't as interest
ing to people as a woman with a past
If yoa ask a boy how his boll is, he
will take off the bandage and show you.
Some people imagine that, as soon as
they get married, they must kiss in
public.
If a man expects to amount to any
thing, he must accomplish it in spite of
hard luck.
Marrying men are beginning to re
mark that women have too much Idle
time on their hands.
There are lots of men who are pretty
In society, but who are as absolutely
useless as dried currants.
No woman should give way to grief;
let her keep her hair frizzed, and every
thing may come around all right.
Nearly all the women recite these
days. They will simply have to quit
it; the men are shy enough as it is.
Much as people like to hear secrets
they have the greatest admiration for
the friends who have never told them
any.
We have noticed that when a man Is
approached about advertising, he says
he will "think about It," or "see you
again."
The people should remember when
fating, that Death keeps his white
horse ready with the harness on in this
weather. '
JETSAM.
A new locomotive near Wlshington
made thirty-flve miles in thirty-three
minutes, and for a .part of the distance
ran at the rate of 102 miles an hour.
The map on the north wall of the
Broad street station of the Pennsyl
vania railroad in Philadelphia is fifteen
feet wide and 126 feet long, and is said
to be the largest map in the world.
The incomes from the London dally
papers are thus put down: Daily Tele
graph. 130,000; Times. 120,000; Stan
dard. 70,000; Morning Post. 45,000;
Daily Chronicle. 40,000, and Daily
News, 30,000.
It is estimated that 30 per cent of
the iron manufactured by Tennessee
Is sold outside of the southern states. It
is said to be the favorite iron with pipe,
plow and stove makers in the east and
north.
The total wheat crop of New Zea
land for this year is 3,618,000 bushels,
or 1,000,000 less than for the previous
year. It is estimated that the colony
will have to import 500,000 bushels to
supply itr own requirements.
Of the four nationalities making up
the population of Great Britain and Ire
land, the Scotch are the heaviest men,
the average weight being: Scotch, 175.3
pounds; Welsh, 168.3 pounds; English,
1&5 pounds; Irish, 154.1 pounds.
Working for the good of otheers indi
ravtly t rings alout our own good.
There is no true greatness except the
greatness of usefulness.
The despised milkweed can be used to
advantage. Its teed yields a tne oil.
A i erf ect jam that made of plums.
KNOWLEDGE
Brings comfort and improvement and
tends to personal enjoyment when
rightly used. The many, who live bet
ter than others and enjoy life more, with
less expenditure, by more promptly
adapting the world's beBt products to
the needs of physical being, will attest
the value to health of the pure liquid
laxative principles embraced in the
remedy, Syrup of Figs.
Its excellence is due to its presenting
in the form most acceptable and pleas
ant to the taste, the refreshing and truly
beneficial properties of a perfect lax
ative ; effectually cleansing the system,
dispelling colds, headaches and fevers
and permanently curing constipation.
It has given satisfaction to millions and
met with the approval of the medical
profession, because it acts on the Kid
neys, Liver and Bowels without weak
ening them and it is perfectly free from
every objectionable substance.
-, Syrup of Figs is for sale by all drug
gists in 50c and $1 bottles, but it is man
ufactured by the California Fig Syrup
Co. only, whose name is printed on every
package, also the name, Syrup of Figs,
and being well informed, you will not
accept any suDeutute u oaereo.
PROFITABLE DAIRY WORK
Can only be accomplished with the very best
of tools and ms3 appliances.
With a Davis JO Cream Sepa
rator on the 3 aMma 'arm yu are
sure of more I and better
butter, while .f the skimmed
milk is aval- liable feed.
Tanners will J'?r make no mis
take to get a y ' Davis. Keat.
Illustrated J '!gv catalogue
mailed free " ' - Agents wanted
WXAVIS & RANKIN BLXG. & JCFQ. CO.
Cor. Randolph & Dearborn Sts., Chicago.
TDIE TO WAKE UP.
DEMOCRATS AND REPUBLICANS
MAY TAKE WARNING.
The Cause of Cleveland ism Is Not the
Cause of Honest Men Being Helped
by the CioKd Republicans Self He
lped Should Rebel.
The Peoria Journal, one of the most
respected republican papers of the west,
has the following to say about that
Cleveland conspiracy to gobble up the
gold wing of the republican party :
The goldites are formulating a scheme
to betray the republican and democratic
parties and prostitute noth party or
ganizations to the single standard gold
monometallic idea. The scheme was
disclosed in Washington a day or two
since. It is the purpose of President
Cleveland and those who believe with
him to corrupt both party organiza
tions so as to use them in the interests
of the gold-corner. Just prior to the
last congressional campaign, President
Cleveland, Mr. Harrity, Mr. Quincy and
a few others, among whom were some
republicans, held a conference at the
White House at which a scheme was
put up to continue the work of the Na
tional League of Democratic as well as
Republican clubs with the Congression
al Committee, of which Mr. Harrity is
chairman. The purpose of the little
gathering of the White House was an
nounced by Mr. Cleveland himself. He
intimated that the party in power pro
posed to use its machinery to secure the
election of "Bound money" Democrats
in democratic districts and "sound
money" Republicans in districts that
were not democratic. The scheme was
to be worked as quietly as possible to
avoid exposure. Mr. Cleveland arguing
that the Democrats had better be in the
minority in the next congress than to
be in a majority and not in sympathy
with the "sound money" idea. The re
sult of the Congressional election is
known. Mr. Cleveland's desire was ac
complished. Following out this idea
Messrs. Chauncey F. Black, president
of the League of Democratic Clubs, Sen
ator Faulkner, one of the leading spirits
of the League, and also Chairman of the
Democratic Congressional committee
which took such a prominent part in
the last Congressional election, and
Mr. Lawrence Gardiner, Secretary of
the League, held a conference in Wash
ington on Thursday, August 8, 1895. At
this meeting it was decided to issue
orders to the Democratic Clubs through
out the United States who belong to the
league, not only to support in every way
the administration and Mr. Cleveland's
gold policy, but to use their influence
for the election of "sound money" men
to Congress in districts that are not
Democratic. In other words, the ma
chinery of both parties are to work for
a common end, viz.: the complete de
struction of silver as a money of re
demption. The semi-official statement
of the intentions of the officers of the
league is that the purpose is to encour
age the clubs in nearly every, if not
every, state in the Union, and the pur
pose is to use all its power to overcome
the independent free coinage of silver
sentiment in the Democratic ranks first
and in the Republican ranks second.
Wherever State conventions have in
dorsed the administration, the league
will render every possible assistance to
the Democratic ticket. Where the ad
ministration is not indorsed, the clubs
are to use their influence on behalf of
the advocates of "sound monej" Where
conventions have not yet been held,
their influence will be exercised to se
cure indorsement of the administration
and the ".sound money" principles.
Where conventions have already been
held, and have taken a position an
tagonistic to the administration, such
assistance will not be given as in other
states, the efforts of the league being
devoted chiefly to securing the election
of "sound money" delegates to the next
national convention. It is believed that
the impetus derived from the league
meetings in the states which stand for
"sound money" will gather strength
for be administration in those states
which are doubtful on this question,
and by the prestige thus attained, go a
long way toward overcoming the anti
administraton sentiment in other
states. Such is the program as has been
agreed upon, and from now out the ma
chinery of both old parties may be said
to be working in perfect harmony be
hind the same.
The whole scheme will be complete
when ex-Secretary Whitney receives
the democratic nomination for the
Presidency in 1896. Harrity and Pati
son of Pennsylvania will control the
delegation from that state for him.
Ex-Mayor Grace, ex-Governor Flower.
ex-Secretary Fairchild, and Senator
Murphy will see that New York is at
tended to. Senator Cal Brice will look
after Ohio, while Senator Faulkner and
Henry G. Davis will look after the two
Virginias. Claude -Mathews has sig
nified a willingness to see that Indiana
is in line for the Standard Oil magnate.
It is known that he secured Isaac P.
Gray's appointment as minister to Mex
ico. Mr. Whitney's irlends are also
in control of the democratic machinery
in all the New England states, and that
even in Illinois the Morrison element
is not opposed to him. Secretary La
mont is now spending a short season
with the Standard Oil magnate and this
is taken a an indication that the ad
ministration is quietly at work groom
ing him for the race. It is whispered
in Washington that at me proper time
President Cleveland will put his foot
down on a third term and pass the word
along the line for Whitney.
tireat So lie in e.
The Boston Transcript has evolved
a scheme by which it believes gold can
be drawn from Europe, and here is the
way it would go about it:
The accumulation of gold in the Eu
ropean banks is phenomenally large,
according to the treasury experts at
Washington. On the first week of
April the Bank of England had $183,-j
681,273 in coin and bullion, and the'
Bank of France in the same week car
ried $406,347,884 in gold alone. The
Imperial Bank of Germany carried
$231,807,310 in coin and bullion, the
Austro-Hungarian bank $86,594,501 in
gold and the Bank of Russia $310,427,-
400 in gold. It is the opinion of the
well-known banker, Mr. Charles C.
Johnson of Boston, that this excess of(
foreign capital will drift to the United
States for profitable investment. Such
a gold current would solve all doubts
about our gold reserve, and would, in
Mr. Jackson's opinion, have a striking
effect upon prices in the United States.'
How important it is to business, thenj
that no foolish fanfaronade about sil-j
ver should control the action of ourj
government in any way and again pro-j
duce European distrust as to its ability
or disposition to pay all demands upon
it in gold.
In plain words the paper in question
would simply borrow the gold by issu-j
ing long-time securities at a reasonablej
rate of interest. This is precisely thei
way Grover Cleveland proposes to pro-j
tect the gold reserve, and ifhe print-;
ing presses hold out he will, in time,
draw all the gold from Europe to this
country, but by that time he will have'
a chattel mortgage not only on every!
man, woman and child in the United
States, but on Old Glory as well.
The Kiehet Nation.
And now it is a French economist inj
the person of Professor Francois who
comes out in a magazine in Paris, andt
informs the world that the United
States is the richest nation on earth.5
and possesses 25 per cent of the wealth
of civilized humanity: In his computa-j
tions the professor takes Into account;
the resources of no less than nineteen1
nations. He delves into the question;
with all the enthusiasm of a true scien
tist. He appears to reach his conclu
sions in a perfectly fair and Impartial
sort of way, and being a Frenchman
born and bred, no one can justly accuse
him of undue partiality for the United
States. The order in which the na
tions are classed in the professor's
summary makes the United States
first as aforesaid. England second,
France third, and Germany fourth.1
Russia and Austria come next in the'
order named, and the balance do not, in
combined wealth, equal the American
Republic. There 13 just one little point
in his very interesting economic com-,
putation that Professor Francois fails;
to fully elucidate. That one point is
how it happens that the United States,
being first in wealth, is the only one of:
the four leaders to be obliged to borrow
money at ruinous rates in times of
peace, from her less wealthy neigh
bors. It is not doubted that there is(
more wealth on this side of the Atlan
tic Ocean, and under the flag of one
government than there is under any
other ensign on earth. But in full
view of this seemingly well fortified
fact, it still remains to be explained on
other than a free coinage basis how the
wealthiest nation is the borrower, the
Jess wealthy, the home of the "only in
terest" that has money to loan in im
mense quantities. When Professor
Francois thinks he has time he might
earn a dollar orCtwo by discovering an
answer to this problem, provided, of
course, his answer favors the "inter
ests" spoken of by Proressor Lawrence
Laughlin, as the only institution from
whom President Cleveland could bor
row gold. Ex.
C'ominc Home.
A London correspondent of the New
York Evening Post is authority for the
statement that most of the bonds sold
abroad by the syndicate are coming
back to the United States to be sold for
American gold for export. He esti
mates that about $S,000,000 will be re
turned during the month of September.
Here is what he says about the situa-.
tion:
The most unfavorable point in the
situation, as regarded by financiers
here, is the enormous amount of ac
commodation bills which it is believed
have been already drawn to effect ex
change. These, it is feared, have al
ready been so large as to materially dis
count any future effect likely to be pro
duced by the bills yet t6 be drawn in
connection with the usual harvest
crops. Reassuring statements on this
aspect of the question would have a
good effect here.
This statement from what is consid
ered one of the best informed authori
ties and confirmed by dealers in ex
change outside of the syndicate is
anything but reassuring. There is a
well-grounded belief in banking circles
that the syndicate cannot meet its obli
gations with commercial bills and will,
ere lortg. be compelled to ship gold in
stead. Ex.
Kale Field's Hawaiian Mission.
The announcement that Miss Kite
Field will go to Hawaii in the interest
of a Chicago paper will be of exceeding
interest to the admirers of that bril-'
liant woman journalist. Miss Field is
an exceedingly bright "and graphic writ-!
er. She is a shrewd observer of human
nature, and her extended experience
will peculiarly qualify her to write in
telligently and interestingly of Hawaii,
its people and its institutions. There is
nothing of a visionary character about
Miss Field. She is the victim of no fads
and is wedded to no isms, save that she
is an enthusiastic advocate of woman's
right to earn her living in her own
proper way. She can write, moreover,
and is not afraid to speak her mind.
!
We have noticed that whea a man is
approached about advertising, he says
he will "think about it," or "see you
again."
If you ask a boy how his boil is, he
will take off the bandage and show you.:
AMERICAN SCHOOLS:
Fralta of Their Work Compared With
Forelgrh Conntriea.
Colonel Robert G. iDgersoll gave ut
terance to a few striking educational
truths in a recent address delivered be
fore the surviving soldiers of his regi
ment at Elm wood, 111. He said:
"We spend more for schools per head
than any natiou in the world. Great
Britain spends 51.30 per head on the
common schools; France spends 80
cents; Austria, 30 cents; (iermany, 50
cents; Italy, 25 cents, and the United
states over 2. 50. I tell you the school
house is the fortress of liberty. Every
school house is an arsenal, filled with
weapons and ammunition to destroy
the monsters of ignorance and fear.
As I have said ten thousand times, the
school house is my cathedral. The
teacher is my preacher. Eighty-seven
per cent of all the people of the United
States over ten years of age can read
and write. There is no parallel for
that in the history of the wide world.
Over 42,000,000 of educated citizens, to
whom are open all the treasures of lit
erature. Forty-two millions.of people,
able to read and write! I say, there is
no parallel for this. The nations of
antiquity were as ignorant as dirt
when compared with this great repub
lic of ours. There is no nation in the
world that can show a record like ours.
We ought to be proud of it. We ought
to build more schools, and build them
better. Our teachers ought to be paid
more, and everything ought to be
taught in the public schools that is
worth knowing.
"I believe that the children of the
republic, no matter whether their
fathers are rich or poor, ought to be
allowed to drink at the fountain of ed
ucation, and it does not cost ' more to
teach everything in the free schools
than it does to teach reading, writing
and ciphering.
"Have we kept up in other ways?
The postoffice tells a wonderful story.
In Switzerland, going through the
postoffice in each year, are letters, etc.,
in the proportion of 74 to each inhab
itant. In England the number is GO.
in Germany 53; in France, 39; in Aus
tria, 24; in Italy, 16, and in the United
States, our own home, 110. Think of
it. In Italy only "5 cents paid per
head for the support of public schools,
and only sixteen letters. And this is
the place where God's agent lives. I
would rather have one good school
master than two such agents."
Small fry Swindlers.
!ome of the meanest of thee are they who
seek to trade upon and make capital out of
the reputation of the greatest of Amrriran
tonics. Ho-tetter's Stomach Hitters, by imi
tating its outward guise. Keputable druz
jcists, however, will never foist upon you as
genuine spurious imitations of or substi
tute for this sovereijn remedy for ma aria,
rheumatism, dyspesla, consumption, liver
complaint and nervousness. Kemand, and
If the dealer be honest, you will pet the gen
uine article.
Other Victims Came Earlier.
The occasional contributor walked
into the office of the editor and bowed
to that dignified but busy personage
gravely.
"I would like to see the proofread
err," he said. 44I have a trifling affair
to adjust with him."
"Very sorry," the editor replied,
"but several other gentlemen have ap
plied ahead of you for the privilege of
shooting the proofreader." Chicago
Times-Herald.
Tared With Molasses.
Perhaps the oddest pavement ever
laid is one just completed at Chino,
CaL It is made mostly of molas&es,
and if it proves all of the success it is
claimed to be, it may point a way for
the sugar planters of the South profita
bly to dispose of the millions of gallons
of useless molasses which they are said
to have on hand. The molasses used
is a refused product, hitherto believed
to be of no value. It is mixed with a
certain kind of sand to about the con
sistency of asphalt and laid like as
phalt pavement. The composition dries
quickly and becomes quite hard, and
remains so. The peculiar point of it is
that the sun only makes it drier and
harder, instead of softening it, as might
be expected. A block of the composi
tion several feet long, a foot wide and
one inch thick was submitted to severe
tests and stood them well.
No Filigree Work.
Dean Hole tells of an old-fashioned
cathedral verger, "lord of the aisles,"
who one noon found a pious visitor on
( Viic lrne in th snfrl rmilrlirtrr TVi
verger hastened up to him and said, in
a tone of indignant excitement. "The
t tsnrioot in tHic 'M t Vi prl Tt 1 nro fit 1 fl in
the morning and at 4 in the afternoon,
and we don't have no fancy prayers."
Argonaut.
Tongue and Doctor Got a Kent.
"My doctor," said a somewhat vol
uble lady, "was writing me a prescrip
tion yesterday. I generally ask him
all sorts of questions while he is writ
ing them. Yesterday he examined me
and sat down to write something. I
kept talking. Suddenly he looked up
and said: 'How has your system been?
Hold out your tongue.' I put out that
member and he began to write. He
wrote and 1 held out my tongue, and
when he got through he said: 'That
will do.' 'But.' said I, 'you haven't
looked at it.' 'No,' said he, I .didn't
care to. I only wanted to keep it still
while 1 wrote the prescription.'
Had to Draw the Line.
Poole, the tailor, was an accommo
dating gentleman, and was often in
vited to the houses of "the great."
When staying with a certain nobleman,
he was asked one morning by his host
what he thought of the party who had
assembled the night before. "Why,
very pleasant indeed, your grace, but
perhaps a little mixed.". "Hang it all,
Poole!" responded the jovial- peer, "I
couldn't have all tailors!'' -
The man is very poor who can put his
riches in an iron safe.
DR. J. C. AYER'S
The Only
SARSAPARILLA
Permitted at World's Fair,
Highest of all in Leavening Power. Latest U. S. Gov't Report
Bee's on Baby's 'Head.
Two children of John Fehr, residing
near Straustown. Germany, had a
thrilling adventure with a swarm of
bees. The insects left the hive in a
large, black, and variegated ball, as
usual when swarming, and alighted
upon a 2-year-old child who was play
ing in the yard, totally unaware of the
danger. Another child, Merton, aged
14 years, fortunately realized the dan
gerous condition of affairs, and having
learned that swarms will vacate cer
tain places when noise is produced, at
once secured tin kettles and hammered
upon them with great energy. The din
and confusion caused the bees to leave
the child unharmed, and in a few mo
ments more the swarm alighted upon a
pine tree, where the owner subsequent
ly captured them in a hive. Neither
of the children, singular to relate, had
received a single sting.
We will rive tl00 reward for any case of
catarrh that can not be cured with Hall
Catarrh Cure. Taken internally.
F. J. CHENEY & CO., Proprs.. Toledo. O.
Whole Wheat Bread.
A New York physician gets around
the eating of bolted wheat flour by
eating unground wheat. The objec
tion to the bolted fiour is. of course,
well known that it is deprived of cer
tain necessary nutriments to the
human body. Hence the reason for
eating graham flour. This physician,
however, does not stop with graham
flour, but eats the grain whole, and
says his family does not tire of it after
its use for three years.
If the cooking is well done there is
an agreeable nutty flavor of the wheat
which corresponds to the bouquet of
grapes. This flavor seems to be lost
when the wheat is cracked, crushed or
ground before cooking. If this flavor
is not desired, the cleaned whole wheat
may be pounded in a mortar or run
through a coffee mill. This will short
en the time of cooking to four hours or
less, the time required for whole wheat
being eight or ten hours. Good House
keeping. Metal Wheels for Your Wagons.'
The season for cutting corn fodder
being close at hand, it may be we'll for
farmer?1 to get a set of these low metal
wheels with wide tires. They can be
had any size wanted from 20 to 56
inches in diameter, with tires from 1
to 8 inches wide. By having low wheels
enables you to bring the wagon box
down low, saving one man in loading
fodder, etc. It is also very convenient
for loading and unloading manure,
grain, hogs, etc., and will save In la
bor alone their cost in a very short
time. These wheels are made of best
material throughout, and have every
possible advantage over the high wood
en wheels with narrow tires, and will
outlast a dozen of them. There will
also be no resetting of tires necessary,
and consequently no blacksmiths' bills
to pay. Wide tires save your horses
and prevent cutting up your fields.
For further information write The
Empire Manufacturing Co., Quincy,
111., who will mail catalogue free upon
application.
atifactory to llim
"No. Mr. Northside." said Miss Du
kane. with decision. "I cannot accept
you. To be perfectly frank, you are
really the last man in the world 1
would think of marrying."
"That suits me precisely," replied
the suitor.
"How so. sir?" demanded the girl,
with some asperity. "Did you propose
from a sense of dut3 hoping I would
reject you, or had you a wager on the
subject?"
"Neither, 1 assure you. You said I
am the last, man in the world you
would think of marrying. Now I see
no reason in the world whv you should
think of marrying an'body else after
me."
This cheerful view of the matter so
charmed Miss Dukane that she accept
ed it herself. The two will be married
in September. Pittsburg Chronicle
Telegraph. Hilliard table, second-hand, for sale
cheap. Apply to or address, H. C. Axis,
"oil S. l'.th St.. Omaha, Neb.
Tomato Sou p.
One can of tomatoes, one pint of soup
stock or beef tea, two teaspoonsfuls of
flour, one cupful of milk, one teaspoon
ful of butter, sugar, salt, one-half tea
spoonful of soda. Melt the butter in
the soup pot, add the tomato and stock.
Boil until the tomatoes ars thoroughly
cooked, then strain through a sieve.
Put back over the fire, and when boil
ing hot add the milk, flour, sugar, salt
and soda rubbed perfectly smooth to
gether. As soon as thickened take
from the stove and serve with small
squares of toasted bread.
The doing right alone teaches the value
of meaning rtsbt.
'Webster's International
Successor xf the
Specimen pages, etc.
Standard of the r.S.
It is easy
G. A C. Merriam Co.,
The best remedy
for all diseases
of the blood.
The best record.
Half a century
of- genuine cures.
nv n o
Lace From Baric.
The department of agriculture, for
estry division, Washington, has a col
lection of rare trees and plants only
second to that belonging to the famous
Kew gardens. London. A recent addi
tion to this dendrological muse'um is a
"lace bark tree" from Jamaica. The
inner bark of this queer tree is com
posed of many layers of fine and intri
cately woven fiibers which interlock
with each other in all directions. Caps,
ruffles, and even complete suits of this
curious vegetable lace have been made.
It bears washing with common laundry
soap, and when bleached in the sun ac
quires a degree of whiteness seldom
excelled by artificial laces made of cot
ton, linen and silk. This intricate web
of this unique bark makes it compare
favorably to the last mentioned pro
ductions for both beauty and dura
bility. Hegeman's Camphor Ice with Glyrert n.
CureiChapieu Hands and Face, Tender or sore r"tt.
Chilblain, Pile. &c. C.O. Clark Co.. New Haven, CU
Charges .Tost the Same.
Clerk Mr. Petersbe's watch that he
brought in to be fixed I find has since
begun to go all right of its own accord.
Jeweler When he comes in tell him
the mainspring is broken and the fly
wheel is off its lever, but that we can
have it ready by the end of the week.
Charges, S'-iiO. Judge.
Evers- mother should always have at hand
a b i.tl vt arkerS tim.er Tonic. No. hl-.m el-e m
goo 1 for pain, weakness colds, and tlt-eleMiess.
Ammunition Wasted.
Hogan Oi have a joke on Houghlig
han. They was a felly kern into bis
place an' took three drinks in rapid se
cession av his whisky an' thin pulled a
gun an' shot himself.
Gropran Oi think the joke is on the
man. Fwat for did he go to the trouble
av usin a gun afther three drinks av
Houghlighan's whisky? Cincinnati
' Tribune.
ov la the time to eure your Corns
withllln lerorns. it tak-st emo tjerfectlr g;es
couitort to tlie f.et. Ask yonr dravcist tor it. 16c
The Tables Turned.
A Scotchman once neatly turned the
tables on an Englishman who had been
' alluding to the number of Scots in
' London. "Well." replied the Scot, "I
! know a place in Scotland where there
' are 30,000 Englishmen who never go
back to their own country." "Why,
wherever can such a crowd be?" said
the Englishman, to whom the Scot dry
ly remarked, "at Hannockburn."
FITS All Fits stopped free bv Dr. Kllnf's Great
Jierve Restorer. No Filsafter tue nrsiday s use.
llarveioucurfc. Treatiseaml $2 trial txiul" in-r Ui
1 il cabeb. bead to Vr. KtineJ&il ArcU 6U, flala., la.
Ignorant Interviewer.
Speaking of the ignorance of some
newspaper interviewers. Henry Wat-
Iterson relates an incident that happen
ed in New York, when a young man
was sent to the Fifth Avenue hotel to
: interview Ilutherford 1. Hayes on some
; matter of prison reform. When the in
' terviewer had gathered all the facts,
he shot a last question at Mr. Hayes.
"By the way. Mr. Hayes," he said,
"what were you president of?"
I am entirely cured of hemmorrhage c.f
lungs ty Fiso's Cure for Consumjtion.
; Lomsa Linpamasn, Bethany, Mo., Jan. fc,
! 1M4.
Overentliasiastic.
Advertising extremes don't always
work. One enterprising restaurant
keeper in town surprised his customers
and many others a few weeks ago by
displaying in his window this sign,
'Our ice cream is hot stuff." He
worked in his slang all right, but won
dered why trade fell off. Syracuse
Post.
"Hanson's Blaglc Corn Salve."
Warranted to cure or money refunded. Ask year
druOTfct for It. Price 15 cents.
Uolden opportunities do not nj iniircles.
ASSIST NATURE
a little row and then
in removing offend
ing matter from the
stomach and bowels
and you thcrtby
avoid a multitude
of distressing de
rangements and dis
eases, and will have
less frequent need
of your doctor's
service.
Of all known
agents for this pur
pose, Dr. Pierce's
Pleasant Pellets are
the best. Once
used, they are al
ways in favor
The Pellets cure
biliousness, sick
and bilious head
ache, dizziness, cps
tiveness, or consti
pation, sour stom
ach, loss of appetite, coated tongue, indi
gestion, or dyspepsia, windv belchings,
"heart-burn," pain and distress after eat
ing, and kindred derangements of the
liver, stomach and bowels.
" Unabridged."
Bent ou applicatio.a.
JDidlionary
Supreme Court, thi r.S. Gov't PrinUn Office, and
o 0 !
l6T
nearly au bciiooidoou. Lummeuueu uy au ntaie uperinienuenld oi fecnoois.
THE BEST FOR PRACTICAL PURPOSES.
It is easy to find the word wanted.
It is easy to ascertain the pronunciation.
It is easy to trace the growth of a word.
to learn what a word means.
Publishers, Springfield, Maes.
fif Successfully Prosecutes Claims.
1 1 XAte PrinclpaJ Efimlner U.S. Pension Bureau.
M Syr -a last war, IS adj udicaUug clauut. attjaiooa.
S 1 0 0 0 U PW ARDS m wttii small rapJ
e by aafe method of KVntematk xie-ulata
In rraia. Book an I full particul r frre Nal'l liank
References. I'ATTtaON Co.. 6U Mm .ha I'.Uig , Chicago.
W. 3i. U., Omalia-SO, ll5.
N heD answering advertisement kindly
mention this paper
M
p j CUhtS WHthE ALL tLbt rAlLS. ft
I I Bert Vrnts'i Bjrap. T&rtea Good. Use I
in time. Bold t druy;ipta.
nt?1"
i i