MONDAY, JANUARY &3, PAGE FOTO ttkifrffiovifc sttii-feEiLLt rotten At 13be plattsmoutb jfournal PUBLISHED SEMI-WEEKLY AT PLATXSMOUTH, NEBRASKA Entered at Postofflce. Plattsmouth. Neb., aa second-class mail matter R. A. BATES, Publisher SUBSCRIPTION PRICE $2.00 That still small voice is the voice of the people. :o: Noah did not wait for his hip to come in. He built it.' o : o One fellow who Isn't cutting much ice now Is the iceman. -:o:- Special session of the legislature next week. More taxes. :o: About .the only tiring reigning ii Russia now Is consternation. -:o:- The spirit of '76 survives all -righ't but the spirit of S6 i3 still. :o: A Chicago maniac who swallowed five spoons was all stirred up. :o: To be a gentleman, all a man has to do is to hide his meanness. :o: In reply to "What is the world comdng .to?" we say "America." o:c The pipe offers the strongest ar gument in favor of age before beauty. : o: The headline, "Federal Aid Drouth Victims' aroused many false hopes. :o: The old .time reformer used to work without salary and pay his own expenses-. It's different now. :o: Chief Justice cf the United States Supreme Court received $15,000 a year. While the others get $14,000. :o: As we -understand it, Russia's main needs are statesmen with brains and foreigners with capital. If there is an ordinance tDmpMl- ing the people t ) keep thtir walks clear of Know, why is it enforced? o:c There mmt be a tU j th- meitte 'taxation, or 'lie tariiir are ruined and along with tht-:n rnuny business men. The paper money issue in soviet Russia ha3 reached 11 trillion ru bles. Russia's greatest need seems to be a pressman's strike. :o: In the old days, we always kept the family skeleton hidden. Now she parades her bones at almost every party in evening gowns. :o: If hoopskirts come back and cheek-to-cheek dancing continues, life is go ing to brighten up right away for the masculine wallflower. :o: Our idea of -a blow at the very foundation of government is when a democrat has to get cut of office to make room for a republican. :o: The 4v. C. carnival which closes tonight has been a great success. Large crowds every night and all in attendance speak highly of the pleas ure that it afforded. The manage ment certainly deserves great credit. "It don't take a man long to bag his pants at the knees, and to make a finely tailored suit look thoroughly disrepu table that's the man of it," avers Dainty Dortby. But 6he goes on to explain that the men who is making use of our cleaning, steaming and pressing services Is keep ing his clothes in much more presentable condition than when he got acquainted with us. And it doesn't cost much, either. 1 rir-' - Good Called for and Delivered -A' -TfT'31 5 I flf ii5iU'M at; S2 ryrrv'frrXmmlY'y'' Kki 1 ' 8 5 g t i PER YEAR IN ADVANCE A man may be handicapped by be ing born a poet but there is no rea son why he shouldn't brace up and make something of himself. :o: It is said that G rover C. Bej-gdoll want3 to become an aviator. Well, if he does, gravity can take its course bo far as we are concerned. :o: The experts say the 5-cent loaf of bread 13 an impossibility, so we sup pose the Chicago -bakers who are sell ing them haven't heard about it. If Darwin could have lived to see some of our present congressmen he would bave been t-pared the necessity of writing a whole book to prove his theory. :o: One dozen clothespins with every purchase of Blank's garters Adver tisement.. A safe Investment. If the garters fail to held one can use the clothespins. :o: When "the boys went away, speak ers' declared: "Everything we bave is yours." When the war was over the boys agreed that the statement was about right. :o: The farmers may be the backbone of the country, as so often has been claimed, (but nobody is denying that the reformer folk continue to be the jawbone of the country. :o: Freezing temperatures in Californ ia must be very aggravating lo the residents, and may suggest to them the desirability of acquiring some industry He sides climate. :o: I . Taxation gees on. Even Mr. Ford y.i ins Muscle biioai oner ne asKs t.iC kovommeat to help him with I it 100,000,000, or more. And the peo ple will be called upon to pay the f-.eiglu. :o: Germany is very sad over her na tional deficit as reported to the re parations commission, but think how much sadder she would 'be if she had to come through the year obliged to report a surplus. : :o: Messrs. Cloidt and Moore, manag ers of (the Parmele theatre, are put ting forth their greatest efforts to please their patrons with the best pictures goirg. And we are pleased to see they are receiving the patron age they deserve. 0:0 A paragraph going the rounds now is: "Some men's idea of person al liberty is to get drrnk and Im pose on people." Probably the cur rent paragraph ten year-, from now will be: "Some men's idea of per sonal liberty is to smoke and naus eate people." :o: In the -words of the lamented Lin coln: "You can fool some people some of the time, some of the people all of the time, b'.:t you can't fool all of the people all the time!" Re member that, Mr. McKelvie. This may not be the correct quotation of the great Lincoln, but it serves our purpose just the same. :o: An Omafia woman called on the (police recently, saying her husband i had just spanked her, and she wished l to have him arrested for operating a still. The policeman tcld ilier to calm her temper and go back home land tell ber husband that the -po- ! liceman and several friends would come over to pend the evening. :o: Senator Pat Harrison says that Postmaster General Hays will accept that offer of $150,000 per year to look after tthe legal affairs of the movie trust. Pat evidently regards Will in the :;ame class with that preacher who was praying over the question of. accepting a call to a larg or church while his wife was busily engaged ia packing up the household effects. :o: Congressman Jefferls has present ed the ntime of R. B. Howell as sue cesior to Will Hays as Postmaster Ueueral. This sounds a little fMiy, but somewhat political, Just the tame. Howell has been all along a candidate for United States senator, and to got him out of the way of JefTerls, who wants to go to the sen ate. is the move, and Hays may In 1 ! iliion thfi rrF.Jrln t to annnint liim. ' What's the matter with the aesist- fUnt postmaster, who, they say, '-is ' just as competent as Hays bimself? ut Jefferis can't be nominated for tenator with Howell a3 a candidate Now you eah go sleinf Idling. -0:0 he weather man is on hie job. -tot- Governor side. it "gtln it" from all -:o: No matter 3iow good our lorergii Wall street half a dozen times relations, all of them are ipoor. I good, scary jumps and each ' time :o: wall street lau?hd in hla face. Itall- Lots of people are on the rig nr.; . . . iracK, iDUii ueaueu mo iu5 j tor 1 The Irish Free State at least statrt-dr the October iigurea. The Decern ed -well. It kicked out a bum presi- output of steel and iron was en J away off, ithe idle car surplus increas- d. and there were fewer loaded . . ...... . A scientist says that a mosquito has 22 teeth. Let us hope they all ache. :o: Planet Venus is only about 300 miles smaller than the earth in di ameter. :o: A barber shop sin says "If you spit on the floor at home go home to spit." :o: The correct use of "lie" and "lay" also -worries a farmer every time a hen cackles. 0:0 It isn't always the veterinary col lege graduate that displays the most horse sense. ro: Planet Neptune farthest from the sun of those yet known, was discov ered in 1846. :o: Poison liquor and lightning never strikes twice in the same place. They don't 'have to. :d: Of the American casualties due to gas in the last war, only 1 per cent -were fatal. :o: The people have a voice, and when they assert their rights, look out. Vox Populi, Vox Dei. -:o: Let's hope these foreign aviation programs don't mean they will Blip something over on us. :o: A St. Louis man chopped up his furniture with an ax. Try this on your neighbor's piano. :o: New airplanes have everything except -a place to get out and crank when the engine stops. : :o: "Silk Stocking Higher" head line. Don't -worry. They will stop be fore they reach the neck. " :o; - "Women painted in the middle . . ... : ages tinds a scientist, women sun paint in the middle ages. :o: j An alibi is proving you did do what you didn't so somebody will think you -didn't do what you did. :o: The old fasTiioned boy who used to go rabbit hunting on Saturdays now has a son who spends the day at the movies. :a: Miss Alice Robertson, Oklahoma's congresswoman, 13 genng to stand for re-election-, even if she has to run for it. :o: This year -may be different from the other, but it is astonishing bow often you meet up with the same old songs and dance. :o: The federal census says balf .the women marry before they Teach 25, but It is because it takes them eo long to reach 25. :o: Of course, it is none of uor busi ness, but what do the women folks do with all the wh'ite goods- they buy at the White goods 'sales? :o: Premier Briand has resigned. We would like to see his illustrious ex ample 'followed by some office hold ers in Nebraska ibut it's no use sug gesting dt to them. :o: If our rampagous revenue agent. and other fee-graibing officials are al lowed to continue their raids, the corportiticms in Nebraska will 'become so lean that you couldn't fry fat out of them with an ectylene torch. LUNGARDIA is "without a rival" in ordinary or deep-seated Coughs and Colds, difficult breathing, and for the relief of whooping cough. The wonderful results following its use will astonish you and make yoii its life-long friend. Your money back, if you have ever used its equal. Danger lurks where there is a cough or cold. Safe for all ages. 60c and $1.20 per bottle. Manufactured by Lungardia Co., Dallas, Texas. For sale by Weyrich & H&dr&ba Your Doy Can Earn from. $1.00 to $10.00 a Week. Nothing to sell. ' No money required. Quick, easy just an hour or so af ter school. We want good, honest, industrious boys just two in each town and commounity. Write TO DAY for further particulars, a post card will do. - Address Dox 240, Plattimouth -:- Nebraska r7AlL STREET BET3 Considering the facilities Wall street, has for scaring itself to death,' It is remarkabl how successful it is in Avoiding heart Attacks. Loot week, Tor Instance, the "how man Jumned , , . . . - 1 rvaa earuuiKs for November ivere ; announced at 40 million dollars un- freight cars. Then came tne tiriana resignation, disappointing hopes of an immediate stabilizing or n,uro pean conditions, says the Kansas City Star. Reports like these, anybody would think, would be very bad for Wall street's iheart. It isn't what you could call a 'good heart at its best, having a distinct murmur that could be produced by leaky valves. Sud den shocks put a hard strain on it, which lis why Wall street is so care ful what it does. But the surprising thing is that all this Job's news didn't depress Wall street a bit. In fact,' it perked up. The meaning of all this is not far .to seek. The market operators, train ed in the signs of the times, and willing and ready to be bears when ever they see .the chance to make any money, were convinced that the solid underlying prosperity of the squared country was a better bet than mere surface ripples. They are con vinced that the country has turned the corner and is squared away for a straight, long stretch of good go ing. Otherwise they wouldn't bave climbed aboard for a ride. It Is true that stock trading is a speculative game, and its turns are subject to a good many influences not always tracealble to underlying causes, but in (general the stock market is a ba rometer of business. And when it goes up in spite of happenings that ought logically to depress It, it shows the part confidence in healthy con ditions throughout the country plays in the final result. That con fidence Is strong, and last -week knocked out the Job's news. It's juat another sign that the betting odds are swinging around to the side of settled conditions again. ' SHOCKING SELFISHNESS Selfishness on tthe part of the male of the epecles juxtaposed to the some times ifiiercer, ibuit usually more gen tle female, is Hoo common to .be note worthy unless it manifests itself shockingly. But ordinary selfishness was surpassed, chockingly, by the Phlladelph'Jah who slew his wife wtth ithe bread knife and killed himself with 'his razor. A razor, as everyone -knows who uses one for shaving, and as every one knows who s'Sips one into his vest pocket ifor use -in emergency, or in oonftemplalted vengeance, when he sallies tflort.h to a social gathering, is the better iror careful honing and stropping juat (before lit is used, in every instance and for any purpose. But a razor can be twice used alitor one honing and stropping, and no razor ibecomes as serrated as the edge of a breadknike, no matter how of ten -it is used. A bread knife, admirably adapted Tor the purpose for wliioh .it is de signed, cuts like a handsaw. A more cruel weapon could not be imagined. Razor cuts, as everyone knows who h-as observed, . sometimes with dis comfiture, unless well executed, will not stop an advancing enemy before he can reply in kind or bring his sliooting Irons into play. In certain social circles these facts are so well known that they need "no elucida tion. An ordinary selfish man contem plating killing his wife and then killing himself miglut reserve his ra zor tor lis own execution, but only the singularly selfish man would be so callous as to select the b'read- fcnife Ifor uxoroide while reserving ,lthe razor, in prime condition for sui- bide. "Just like a man," the embitter ed married women will say. But it .isn't. The case is singular, decidedly, j In an of the kitchen cutlery there ,ia nidth'ing -which resembles a saw Isarve the Ibreadknife. . The ordinary selfish husband (wwuld, ait ithe very worst, observe jthe unfittness of the breadknife and, j While reserving the raror for him- seir, choose some -weapon 01 onenw less cruel than the breadknife. :o: "A nation grows in strength or falls into weakness with the meas ure of its people's productive work," says a modern economist. This be ing true, it is up to our lawmakers -to do all In their power to make Ne braska more product! v, and this an be done only through the enact ment of laws that Will enliven capi tal ito ibring about production. :o: If it'i ia the card Hue. call at HIS PASSING FANCY There was a man who fancied that, By driving good and fast, He'd get hi a car across the tracks Before the train oame past; He'd mtee the engine by an inch, And make the train hands sore; There was a man who fancied that There isn't anymore. :o: WAYS OF MEASURING A correspondent sends us the fol lowing little anecdote illustrating Lloyd George's ready -wit. On one oc casion when he -was to address a meeting in South Wales, the chair man, thinking to be funny at the speaker's expense, said in introduc ing bim: "I had heard so much about Mr. George that I naturally expect ed to meet a big man in every sense; but as you can see he is very small in stature." Lloyd G-eorge arose. "I am grieved to find," .he said, "that your chair-i man is disappointed in my size, hu: this owing to the way you have hero' of measuring a man. In North Y."a!'?.j! we measure a man from his chin up. ' but you evidently measure Iiini fran: 1 the chin down." After that the chairman mads no more personal re-marks. j :o: ARTIFICIAL Is civilization on the wrong tra. k? A visitor comes to Plattsmouth. W::h greatest pride, yo upolnt cut tiit-l tallest buildings and other construe- ; tion achievements like factories.; bridges and pavements. ' City life, at its best, is artli'ic:!. unnatural. i The -things 'we build out of brirk. ; steel and cement are merely tools'; for enabling civilization to exiit. The real civilization, often mis called "culture" is not material. It is spiritual and intellectual. That is the real measure of a town the character and knowledge of its peo ple. How ridiculous to strive constant ly for a bigge rtown instead of a better town. :o: MUSCLE SHOALS An analysis of the effect on the taxpayers' pocketbook of the accept ance by the government of Henry Ford's offer for Muscle Shoals ni trate aiid power plants is being cir culated by, the National Fertilizer association. The analysis is put in the form of a chart, showing that over a period of 100 years, the term of the proposal leases, on the basis of the calculation which Mr. Ford him self uses, the taxpayers would pay as a subsidy to Mr. Ford $9S4,935, 000. Under the Ford offer for a 100 year lease of the dam and power plant the government must complete the waterpower development with taxpayers' money. Mr. Ford proposes to make two kinds of payments interest and mortization. The interest payments are a par tial reimbursement to the govern ment for the interest which the tax payers must pay on the money in vested in the waiter power. But Mr. Ford's interest payments are limited to $1,680,000 per year. During the first few years his payments are even smaller than this amount in to tal over the 100 years to $161,040, 000. The government, however, must pay interest on $57,000,000 new money invested which at 4 par cent would amount to $2,280,000 per yetar. This, as -will readily be seen. creates a deficit of $000,000 or nioro every year. Amortization payments under Mr. Ford's plan ($46,547 per year) ar? .to be compounded at 4 per cent so that a fund of $48,000,000 may in this way be created Ly the end of the 100-year lease. Since Mr. Ford' i amortization fund is compounded ;.'t 4 per cent for the psriod cf t'u lease to the enormous sum of $1. 032,935,000. To apply against this enormous sum -we have only Mr.. Fords $4 8, 000,000 amortization fund (his in terest payments having -been already deducted to arrive at the daficit). This leaves at the end of 100 years a net loss to the taxpayers of $C84, 935,000. , This $9S4, 935,000 is the su!.-:idy which Mr. Ford will reaciv-e aver ;; period of 100 years from the tax payers if the government accepts his Muscle Shoals offer. The National Fertilizer association does not oppose private operation of the Muscle Shoals nitrate plant un less it involves a subsidy by the gov ernment operation or government subsidized operation in competition with the existing fertilizer industry. :o: A social hint: Guests should al ways depart early enough to leave .the ihosts ample opportunity to dis cuss their faults before bedtime. -:o: The strongest appeals to consider the public welfare are utterly los on a man who 13 looking eagerly: ALV0 DEPARTMENT Turner McKinnon went ,to Lin coln Monday evening. Miss Delia Sutton spent Tuesday with Mrs. Fred P;outy. Mr. and Mrs. Goo. Braun spent Thursday night in Lincoln. Mr. Hull 'is visiting hi.-3 daughter, Mrs. L. Lauritsen and family. LaVerne Stone went to Lincoln Thursday to remain ;. few days. Some ladies iuet with Mrs. A. J. Brobst Tuesday and made three dress forms. Mike Smith returned "Friday neon from Lincoln whore he pent a cou ple of days. Three carlr.:i-1s of hcxr were ship ped fro:n Alvo to Soaiii Omaha Fri if.iy cfiornoon. Geo. P. Fort mt:i and ?i:i Jc-e, k'l't Sun da v for Asatncr-a. :.ir i.Io, to .--pc r.d Six a we: C3! its vi M c a d o w T'r u r? 'la y ue-irlv all tilied. Ho; Em"-! ii If. tO' rv of I-oui viil; v.- V.r. t i I . -. 1 4 .1 u v u Hardware Company, Alvo -:- -:- Nebr. Come see how it vorks Lusnhcs', Grain and Coal! Our prices for grain are always the highest. I own and operate my own elevator. The highest prices for grain is always paid by the Independent Elevator. ' I arn your friend, jonm MURTE ALVO WABASH HAFPEKIKG3 Mr. and Mrs. George Mooncy auto ed to Lincoln Friday. Rev. F.ooie preached here ut the M. E. church Saturday morn hit?. Mr. and JJr?. c:?.r r.ce 1 ool were ccllers in town Thr.r.--'!:y aftcrn..on. rirpr ( ollifir voi.t h.ir.-.o -.vi! h hi uncle and aunt, Mr. r.:.I Mrs. J. V.'. 1 Jones. i Mr. and Mrs. I!. II. C-rhtliii;; ;ui-l j two daughter?. J. L). and Ll'-i. ru-.ohI to Lincoln Saturday. ! Mr. and Mrs. V.lli Mi:rhri ai'tofd ! to Lincoln Sunday to s-j :.fv. 2.;ur-: fin's brother, Charles, v h ) i Li t;;e hospital. i Miss 15cm Ice ( clh-?:! r.t - r..;.Mi a i rarty at the honie : iu-r c :-:r.. . lve Jenkins or. Satur..y : - - if turning home Cin-!cy. Word wuj rtCii-.i-ti 1. :::.urV..:. that Mr. C. S. :-lurii:i f I 1 nJ (d; en to :nent floor. lie is a vt ry serious co:u Mr. r.n-I r. family -:? :it VI r. (.;ib:"0-i. Mrt;. S. . Mr: 1, : ne: ji t - Vi' : : thr : V"!.' ' - ii'i' -. ' i't1 Water! a :t ho at S. Allis '' th- . nn Mrs. I r.Irs. L. ; . ill. Mr. 'i 1 lighter, it -, ail of 1 1 : . ' : . CIrrence ! r';.-1 ?-7urfin, . : ".eiu Col- .s:r-. Glenn :..: :; Mr. of Llaerte; Mr. of Alvo and I-1- - . b'.-i i. Mr? ! ' !"' '! a ". i. ' ' - Will Mrs. and .Air.-:, and Mr.s. Mr. and hawka. Copyle Kay Norris, of Ne- JOHN TrD. PRADY AUTO REPAIRING WELDING! TRUCtCINQ! Careful Attention Given to All Work CALL PHONE 50 Rouse will take treatment at the hos pital. Dr. L. Muiir autoed to Lincoln Thursday afternoon bringing Ms daughter. Miss Carmen borne for the week-end. Mr. Pairfield father of W. E. r'aii-field, died Monday evening at his heme in University Place, aged o5 vears. M; ,s Mildred -Knight of Omaba had the misfortune to fall and Vreak her iarm near the wrist. She v. ill spend some time at home. . m;.-t. Clara Dickerson returned fi' in the state university Friday &f-tt.i-r.ooa to spend the week end with h2T parents, Mr. and Mrs. L- L&ur itsen. Uarcld McKinnon, who is attend :; j: the state university, came borne ! Thur.idav for the week end and vls- :t-d the Alvo schools Thursday af ' 'crncon. Tho Walton Doys and Girls ibasket : ::i trams played Alvo Boys and Zlr'.s 'termtfi here last Saturday :-- at the school house the Alvo winring with a score of 17 to d ihr Alvo pirls winning with a . r v.f -20 to 16. Tii? Community social was beld i Thursday evening at the church i-;iiiy?ment. the A. B. C. D. and F.'s f erving. A nice program consisting cf music and a home talent play was s-Jlven. Refreshments were ice cream, cake and coffee. The attendance was large. The Pythian Sisters of Alvo Tem ple Xo. 2 gave a 1 o'clock luncheon Jan. 13 at the Stewart tiall with h;no guests?, sister Mae Anderson, ii. M. of F., sister Clara Trimble raid si-ter DeFord of North Star Temp'.o No. 10. Lincoln. The hus lund of the local members were al so present. During the afternoon the regular temple meeting was" held which the officers for the ensuing rear were installed by the visiting fisters: P. C, Eta Ayers; M. E. C, Mattie Skfinner; E. S., Ruth Taylor; E. J.. Clara Bornemeier; M. of T., Luollj. Klyver; M. R. C, Pearl Brohst: P. of F., Rosa Foreman; O. G., LaNita Mueller. There was a good attendance. NEBRASKA Her Memory Will Live The following communication has Icon received from Fort Morgan, Colorado, in regard to the life of Mrs. Allis, the memory of whose good deeds will continue to live, even though she is no longer here in per son : To the Wabash Baptist church and community: I learned of the Sudden death of one of Wabash's most wor thy citizens and know the loss you all titstain and assure you of my sym p .thy. Wish it might be said of all e? ii". that we had done as much for 1 vi i vone a:s she has. I refer to Mrs. Aliis, cf whom we thought so much. Respectfully, . A. H. WALTZ. STILL IN CRITICAL CONDITION. '. . 1 rim Friday's Daily. Rfnarts from the C'larkson hos I ii. I ia Omaha state that Percy War-tJit-.i, v.ho was operated on there yes u raay. has come out of the operation . i-a as good a bhape as could be ex jrcted, but Is still in very critical rendition and his recovery the matter i urave doubt as yet. The mother and brother remained at the hospital -. aul the young man regained con ;,cl oai.cKs. Lut as yet the final out :ojne of the case cannot be fully de- ivriained. FOUND 1(ly'3 niuft on fouisville road. t , -uave "'e y calling at ? and PayinS for thiy thia notice, c& TV- wAnted All kinds of sewing. Mrs Tuftn. I'kkett. Phone 601-J Luther -We only Bought Rat Poin .wice," vrntes Je.e Smith, N, J "I threw the Erst kind away; couldn't be bot4, J iru.ng it whh meat. chse. Then I trieH IP . SAY. thaf. thestuffl It "J ,T Sold and guaranteed by Bestor & Swatek Wevrird, s. raba 5. G. Fncke & Co. i . Ib6 IkiifiL Off JC (forward to a twenty per cent fee. i is See! tie Journal tCcc