PAGE 70TTX
Cbc plattsmouth lournal
PUBLISHED SEMI-WEEKLY AT PLATTSMOUTH, NEBRASKA.
Entered at Petofflce, PUttsmouth. Neb., as aecond-clats mall matter
R. A. BATES, Publisher
SUBSCRIPTION PRICE $2.00
Two can keep warmer than one.
. o-
Some optimists are just too lazy
to kick.
-o:
There are now 10,000 known va
rieties of orchids.
:o:
Some of these song hits should
have been missed.
:o:
Umbrellas are like
the poorest are left.
men; usually
-:o:
First savings bank was established
in Hamburg in 177S.
:o:
People who buy oil stock invest
and then investigate.
:o: '
Washington is full of peace and
the roomers of peace.
:o:-
In Liberia, smoking, drinking and
dancing are forbidden.
:o:
American Indians originated the
the game of la crosse.
:o:
Money must be tight when a man
is shy of loose change.
.o:
A person who cannot sing should
not be made to prove it.
:o:
In Germany the goose step has
made way for the side step.
0:0
Some husbands are happy ; others'
wives won't stay home olone.
:o:
America's chief market for rosin
and turpentine is Savannah, Ga.
:o:
We have many philanthropists
when it comes to giving advice.
;0:
Only way to keep the hatchet brr
ied is to put the hammer with u.
-.0:
The orange blossom is the maid
en's favorite for decorative purposes.
. :o:
A household hint jsone of m thoe
" things that Is all a husband dare 3
to offer.
:o:
Well, compared with what the ap
ple cost Adam the price of fruit is
comparatively cheap.
:o:
Prayers for the man who prays
for himself alone probably never got
higher than the roof.
0:0
If wives only knew what stenog
raphers think of their husbands they
would cease to worry.
0:0
William finds the Krupps will
make typewriters. That's what all
wars should be fought with.
:o:
Alxrat the only difference between
us grown ups and children Is that
we weigh more and ain't so happy.
:o:
Every man on the glob has his
faults and his good points. The obi
tuary emphasizes his good points.)
All the rest of the time we jump on
his faults.
c
"It don't take a man long to
bag his pants at the knees,
and to make a finely tailored
suit look thoroughly disrepu
table that's the roan of it,"
avers Dainty Dorthy.
But she goes on to explain
that the man who is making
use of our cleaning, steaming
and pressing services is keep
ing his clothes in much more
presentable condition - than
when he got acquainted with
us. And it doesn't cost much,
either.
Goods Called for and Delivered !
PHONE
16b
OPPOSITE.
-JOURNAL Offitt
PEE YEAR IN ADVANCE
Scientists have finally decided that
the moon is not habited, but we'd
like to know what has become of the
man in it.
0:0
There is only one motor law that
Is necessary to the pedestrian, and
that is to jump as quick and as far
as he can.
:o:
Somebody has gone to the trouble
and expense of cabling the news that
everything is quiet at Lisbon. Had
anybody inquired?
:o:
The old fashioned women wept
for the things she desired, but the
new woman gets them by walking in
her husband's sle&p.
:o:
Former kaiser had 10,000 copper
cooking utensils in his Berlin palace,
although all copper Lad been called
in for war purposes.
:o:
"Why wasn't the treaty clear?"
inquires Frank Simonds. Well, Sena
tor Lodge seems to be the only man
who knows, and he won't tell.
0:0
As a matter of fact, the United
States has been strong for disarma
ment ever since we decided not to
dominate the world with our wooded
fleet.
0:0-
Who remembers when about half
the men in the audience went out be
tween acts and came back looking
bright and cheerful and chewing
gum? ;
:o:
Another unfortunate thing about
this midsummer of ours is the dif
ficulty of dividing our uneasiness
equally between the coal dealers and
the fruit buds.
:o:
If Postmaster General Hays is go
ing into the movie 'business, as re
ported, he at least ought to be a good
authority on what films are unfit to
go through the mails.
0:0
The prize for optimism to an ex-
service man who was heard to say on
a train recently: ine uermans got
my leg and a slacker got my girl, bnt
the man doesn't live who can get my
goat."
:o:
A man never knows how worth
less his earthy possessions are until
he goes to pawn them or is forced
to sell them. About that time he re
ally discovers how much they are
worth to him, too.
:o:
The superintendent of West Point
wants the cadets increased from
1,334 to 2.300. This incr?ase might
not be disarmament, but it undoubt
edly -would give needed l.elp to the
army's football team.
:o:
A professor -wants to abolish the
word "gent" from the language;
which everyone would be glad to do,
provided all the specimens whom
that term peculliarly describes are
abolished from the population first
:o:
A newspaper picture of the queen
of Spain shows her dressed tastily
in a Hed Cross nurse's outfit, but a
picture of her in the act of nursing
would be more impressive. Imagine
her scrubbing the floor of a sick sol
dier'
s room :
:o:-
J Marshal Foch took his wildcat
back to France after all. And in the
'cage with the cat are five white mice
i which Governor Allen of Kansas
; might have borrowed for use in dis
pelling the woman mobbers in the
coal mine district.
:o:
Hiawatha's reputation in southern
N'cbraska. according to the Falls
City Journal, is that it has more
churches and gives more dances than
any other town in the neighborhood.
And yet it can't come up to Platts
mouth in this line of pleasure.
j :o:
j The Chicago police chief declares
,we will make the town dry if it takes
nve tnousana new cops, us not a
simple problem in Chicago, on ac
count of the danger that when the
police force is doubled, the bootleg
gers strength of the town may also
be doubled.
o : o
A member of congress has intro
duced a bill providing a fine of $5,
000 against any member on convic
tion of belonging to a "bloc" organ
Ized by any sectional or industrial
Interest for the purpose of affecting
legislation. Very interesting, like
anti-trust laws tempting, but hard
to enforce. To prove a man is active
in a secret bloc Is like arresting a
man for what he thinks of somebody.
Love la blind. Help the blind.
:o:-
Christmas itself vm Quite a gift.
... .-;o;
An auto is a necessity unless you
get run over by one. t
:o:
Anybody can swear off smoking
after Christmas cigars.
0:0
To forgive and forget is fine; to
give and forget is finer.
:o:
As far as we can see, they have
quit rolling their stockings.
jo:
To keep your wife away from thj
office hire an ugly stenographer.
:o':
There may be merchants who don't
advertise, but you never hear of
them.
:o:
Ford says Muscle Shoals is good
for 1,000 years. A regular little ten
century plant.
:o:
That pavement of good intentions
in hell won't last long after the
speeder get there.
:o:
There is no limit to how funny
Charlie Chaplin can be. He is quot
ing Tennyson now.
:o:
Why worry? Only one person in
1200 is murdered and less than that
get into the movies.
:o:
The most important step some peo
ple take is the shimmy and even
then they feel shaky.
:o:
Germany says she will pay by Jan
uary 15. we nave torn many cre
ditors the same thing.
-:o:
A Frenchman has made gold out
of lead. We saw a plumber make $50
out of a lead pipe once.
:o:
As we understand It, Russia's
main needs are natives with brains
and foreigners with capital.
:o: -
Just when everyone hoped there
would be no crime wave this winter
Christmas neckties appeared.
:o:
A movie star who hires a "double"
for risky stunts can't get one to go
home for him late at night.
0:0
Wonder if indigestion makes peo
ple grouchy or if being grouchy
makes them have indigestion?
:o:
The war veteran who shot a Chi
cago packer must nave discovered
who invented canned corned beef.
:o:
We have laws to keep crazy peo
ple from marrying. But they never
know they were crazy until too late.
1 :o: .
A Kansas court has issued an in
junction against a man to restrain
him from killing his wife. More and
more the courts are taking away
our personal liberties.
:o:
Will Hays has been offered a
$'00,000 position with the movie in
dustry but hates to leave the post
office department, tho it pays only
$12,000 a year. Perhaps Mr. Hays
should go to Judge Landis for legal
advice.
:o:
One writer says the girls, having
enjoyed the freedom of going with
out corsets, will never go back to
them. Well, their ancestors also en
joyed corsetless freedom, and they
went back to them. Logic is a fine
thing except when put Into things
like corsets.
:o:
A friend hack from New York re
ports that longer skirts really are
"catching" on back there. You see
one woman out of about every nine
hundred thousand wearing one, and
that indicates considerably more
popularity there than the long skirt
enjoys out west.
:o:
Men are merely on a lower stage
of an eminence whose summit is
God's throne. Infinitely above all;
and there is just as much reason for
the simplest men 'being discontented
with his position, as respects the
real quantity of the knowledge he
possesses. John Ruskin.
:o:
He didn't molest women or child
ren, arid in a half apologetic way
-went through the men passengers in
a very gentle manner, so the man
who held up the B. & O. flyer near
Chicago the other night is called a
cultured bandit." Without doubt If
there was a Nobel prize for train rob
bers this man would be a formida
ble candidate.
WOMEN
Can Yon Use Some
EXTRA MONEY
If you want to earn some extra mon
ey in your SPARE TIME, show your
inenas ana neignoors a new -ana
every home. NO MONEY REQUIRED.
I must have a representative in each
town and community. Write me TO
DAY, NOW before you forget It. A
post card will do.
fUGQ M. K, OLGON,
Plattsmouth -:- ' Nebraska
KjwTfinotrni tssi-xnsssvi xottbrh
POOB Ald SRAXff3
The world's lffet captive snake
a python" 25 feet lone is brought
from, the Malay jungles to the Na
tional Zoolocical park in Washing
ton. You can watch it safely in its
Class cage, for it has no brain to tell
it that it could smash its way to free
dom by hurling its 250 pounds
against the glass.
No trouble on the journey across
the Pacific. Snake slept all the way.
Its last meal in the Orient was a
large pig, 'crushed in the python's
powerful coils and swallowed whole.
After its meal, the python sleeps
three weeks.
Are you a python? Do you eat too
much at noon, then feel loggy and
drowsy for hours?
Employers may not know it, but
the real reason they want office work
ers down early in the morning is be
cause breakfast is a light meal. With
stomach lightly burdened until noon.
efficiency runs high.
In the afternoon, with several
pecks of corned beef and ca-bbage and
pie a la mode in the stomach, there
is a tendency to yawn, gaze trans
like out the window and manifest
general fog in the head.
Like shoveling too much coal in
the furnace. It puts the fire out.
An empty stomach and a keen
brain are Siamese Twins. That is
why poverty produces so many gen
iuses. Dryden's stomach, was habitually
so empty that he sold 10,000 verses
to Tonsou for $15,000.
Tellier, inventor of cold storage,
starved to death. His invention prob
ably came from wondering how be
could preserve a lot of food if he
ever managed to get it.
Camoens, Portugal greatest poet,
died of starvation in a Lisbon hos
pital. Tens of thousands of similar cases.
From them came the popular notion
that fortune frowns on men of gen
ius' without the empty stomach of
poverty.
Writers and business men ofte,n
say they can think better late at
night. That is because midnight
finds their food partly digested, their
stomaches lightly burdened.
Receipt for stupidity and failure:
Stuff the stomach.
THE VENOMOUS MAN
Every important community has
him, few escape his poisonous darts,
most people fear him and everybody
tries to shun him.
He is not an aggressive man. He
does not fight in the open. He is
known by his whispers and innuen
does. His poison is in the heart in
fectious words and stealth deeds are
the fangs through which it passes
into the lives of his victims.
Ask him his opinion of a neigh
bor and It is Impossible for him to
make a frank acknowledgement of
that neighbor's good qualities-.
"Yes, I have known Henry for a
great many years," he will say, while
his shifty, serpentine eyes betray
the mental search for a vulnerable
spot in his record. "He never both
ers me," he continues in a voice that
suggests charity toward a culprit
"but then, I 'tend to my own busi
ness, and don't meddle with the af
fairs of others."
By the time he has completed his
"friendly" discussion of Henry, a
stranger would reach the conclus
ion that Henry is an extremely un
desirable citizen, though in fact he
is known to be as square and decent
a man as tne community possesses
Whether the subject be society,
business or politics, the venomous
man is the same. Anything that he
touches with his slanderous fangs is.
in the eyes of anyone who believes
him. damaged goods.
Fortunately for the small com
munities In Which be winds his rep
tilian way, the people get to know
him and, as a rule, in the larger
cities, his Influence is fettered by
his obscurity.
Occasionally he gains financial
power. Then he becomes a public
menace, extending the blight of his
evil genius as -far as money can
reach into the lives and affairs of
the nation.
It is a source of gratification o
know that the venomous man rarely
gains his point. His select victims
are saved by the safeguards which
intelligence and intuition throw
about . the' general
well being.
and .individual
When you find a man habitually
given to sly thrusts at persons un
der discussion; when you have ob
served his coiling silence, on occas
ions calling for friendly comment;
when you have seen the sullen dar
kening of his eye as he listens to
the Just praise of another; when you
. bav(J. known hlm io injure and de
faDtte nd studiously guard against
J exposure oy eovermg nis traexs witn
the dust of falsehood you will
know that you have met the veno
mous man.
Thereafter, to associate with hira
or give him your confidence, is to
brand yourself a fool or an aspjrant
for the honors of a snake charmer.
i :q - i
IGNOBLE ART OF FLATTERY
Perhaps the surest test of strength
of character is the decree of one's
susceptibility to flattery.
A man may have a reputation for
great ability and, to superficial ac
quaintances, may bulk large in the
affairs of the world; but if willing-:
ly he accepts flattery, he is riding
to a fall.
As for flattery he is a menace to
friendship and his companionship is
a blight.
It is true that you can catch more
flies with molasses than you can
with vinegar, but beware of the man
who makes this his motto and per
sists in smearing you with the sac
caharine speech of Insincerit5'.
It is one thing to prefer the pleas
ing philosophy of the optimist to the 1
acidulated cynicism of the pessimist, j
and quite another to give willing ;
ear to the hypocritical compliments .
of flattery. j
Love of flattery is a weakness, fa
tal to leadership. It has dethroned
more political leaders than all other,
influences combined, and yet how
few have benefited by the lesson! ,
Go to a nolitical headquarters in ',
a great city and observe the per
formances of the hanger-on, the
place-hunters, and the so-called ;
lieutenants! j
Too often the men who obtain
recognition are the ones moat per-j
sistent in obsequious self-abasement
in the presence of the "boss."
They never disagree with him. in-
dorse every opinion that he expres
ses, withhold the benefit of honest
disagreement, kow-tow meekly and
greet him with good morning.
chief." and never hesitate to curry
favor by tale-bearing and poisonous
ninuations against the really hon
est men of the organization who in
sincere friendship tor tne leader
have expressed disapproval of his
erroneous decisions.
And while these flattering pan
ders are forming an inpenetrable '
circle around the susceptible leader, j
the men of real worth, whose to-'
operation would be valuable, are el
bowed to one side, relegated to the
rear, and eventually alienated and
driven to open hostility.
Occasionally you find a real lead
er of men and when you do. you
find one of sufficient mental strength
to know the difference between a;
flatterer and a friend.
The rule applies to every walk of
life.
The business man who resents the ,
honest opinions of the employe who
disagrees with him, is bound to be
surrounded by flattery, the drip-
pings of whose sugared speech are
found along the easy road to bank
ruptcy.
Those who succeed by flattery.
walk over the prostrate remains of;
reputation which they have slain.
With the flattery is an art but oh.
what a 'base and ignoble art!
The persons who flatters you has
given you not a compliment, but a
slap in the face.
Shun him as you would the breath
of pestilence.
:o:
Everybody we suppose, is more or
less changeable, and there are times
maybe the next morning he feels bet- ;
ter toward the world and guesses
that merely amputation of both'
hands and ears would be punishment 1
enough.
:o: I
Paste this slip in your hat and sec
if it doesn't come true: By the first
of next March every line of business
and industry in this country will be ;
booming, and there will be plenty of
work fpr everybody who is willing
to work.
:o:
STRAYED
Strayed from my pasture, south
west of Cedar Creek, one light "red ;
muley steer. Weight about 450 '
or 500 lbs. Anyone Feeing same
please take up and notify
A. O. AULT,
Cedar Creek, Neb.
Cockrels for Sale
I have a number of pure bred sin
gle combed Buff Orpington cockrels
for sale at $2.00 each if taken before
December 1st.
MRS. J. II. BROWN,
Phone 2412. Murray, Nebr.
Brown leghorn Cockrels
t have a number of brown leghorn
cockrels. mire breds. which are coins
Of rllltr.. maaU C . . . 1 t
uwuM catu. muudy iciepnone
2712. Mrs. Walter Sans. tf-w
LUNGARDIA is "without a rival"
in ordinary or deep-seated Coughs
and Colds, difficult breathing, and
tor the relief of whooping cough.
The wonderful results following
its use will astonish you and make
you its life-long friend. Your
money back, if you have ever used
its equal. Danger lurks where
there is a cough or cold. Safe for
all ages. 60c and $1.20 per bottle.
Manufactured by Lungardla Co.,
Dallas, Texas. For al by
" Weyrich & Hadraba
' J--! "gggg' . ' III''
Happy New Year!
May health, happiness and prosperity be yourg in
bountiful measure in the year to com.
Ghrisf & Shrio4,
FURNITURE
Opposite Court House, Plattsmouth, Neb.
Our very best wishes for a
Happy and
New
Ghrist & Ghriot,
PHOTOGRAPHERS
Coats Block, : :
At this season 'when we all feel most kindly to' those
who have been most kind to us, we wish to extend you
our best wishes for a full measure of Good Health,
Good Luck and Good Cheer, and to say for your sup
port and patronage
"Thank YomS
Cedar Crock Lumbor Company,
Cedar Creek, Nebraska.
In Friendshi
and in a feeling that makes us desire that
you may enjoy a
Happy New Year
and that you may prosper in the yeari
that are to come.
That's Our Wish!
E. J. RICHEY
The Rexall Drug Store
greets its many friends with a wish for a
Happy New Year
and announcing your people's Rexall weather chart is
awaiting you at our place of but incti.
F.G. Firicke ' Co.,
TJto QewsJUL Stan
Subscribe for The Jouirnal
- M ... .rr-T--- .. f-""
Prosperous
Year!
: :
Plattsmouth, Neb.
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