L
GRAND OPENING
Of
EASTER MILLINERY
Fashionabli
Ladies oi Plattsmoulh arc Talking About Fanger's Swell Hals
REGIN
Hats
Trimmed
Free
of
Charge
An Invitation is extended to the ladies of Plattsmouth and
Cass County to come and see the most stylish creations.
FREE FREE
We will trim your Hats for nothing, pioviding you buy
your material or shape at our store. We have in our em
ploy this year two first class trimmers and they will surely
please you.
M. FAWGER'S
DEPT. STORE
8 TOO LATE FOR EASTER
IWON BY SENTIMENTAL APPEAL
81
I lmvo jiiht i-f(M'ivt'
line of ladies trimmed
and children's hats
a large and beautiful
hats, nobby street hats
hich wore nrdend for
Easter, but arrived too late for the trade.
Come and see them. Prices Hight. HATS
TRIMMED FREE F CHARGE, if the ma
terial is purchased at our store.
MR&NORTON
M ! A lady nt a dinner
Zrf( j lsked Prof., Xearlng h
lm I lecture, which hai
vS iitc-i tstlng discussion
5
THE TRUTH.
He Couldn't Understand.
"1 hope I'm not going to be sick,"
said Mrs. Staggers, worriedly; - "my
appetite Isn't what It used to be."
"It's strange," murmured her hus
band from behind his newspaper,
"that the truth of your assertion is not
borne out by the reduced size of the
bills."
Instinct Impels Exercise.
There is an Instinct which impels
the human being to seek health in
muscular exercise and pleasure in
physical exercise. Sir Francis
Treves.
One Day to One Hundred Years.
"When is a woman most beautiful?"
the Georgian is asked. We want to
know how old she is first. Atlanta
Georgian.
Speech.
It shows an uncharitable spirit to
speak ill of the man lower down and
an envious one will speak ill of the
man higher up. Atchison Globe.
S3
The Walking Delegate I tell you
the time will come when the laboring
man will have the capitalist under his
feet.
Tho Funny Man In that case be
will he walking on his uppers.
Would Never Do.
"That gown is as good as new,"
said her husband, "so If you don't In
tend to wear it again why don't you
give it to the cook?"
"Hecause she's a jewel, and 1
wouldn't deliberately do anything to
drive her away," rejoined his wife.
"The gown is out of style."
Just Like Old Sol.
"Boys should be like the sun," said
the philosopher, "always on the job."
"Yes," grumbled the old farmer, "but
too many of them are like the sun in
the winter."
"How's that?"
"Late In getting up."
Uncle Jerry.
"There's two things about this
blamed grapefruit that I can't under
stand,", said Uncle Jerry. Peebles.
"One is that it's called 'grape' fruit,
and the other that it's called grape
fruit' "
The Melodrama.
It was Aunt Matilda's first visit to a
modern playmouse and when a myste
rious buzzing echoed through the au
dltorlum she pulled ber wraps about
her.
"Dear me! she ejaculated. In a
loud whisper, "I hope tbey ain't turn
lng on them thar 'lectrlc fans such
a day as this."
"Sh! auntie," cautioned the niece,
with embarrassment, "that is the vil
lain hissing 'R-rr-rr-r-revenge.' "
All On.
Curse of the Community Old clothes
to-day?
C. D. Soph Yep. Put they're all
I've got. Cornell Widow.
Clever Scheme Devised by Offending
Police Officer to Get Out of
t Difficulty.
Prof. Scott Nearing of the Univer
sity of Pennsylvania, delivered re
?ently in Philadelphia a brilliant ad
iress upon the theme that "woman's
'unction Is not to bear many children,
but 'to bear good children."
in Locust street
how he reconciled
had aroused much
ig discussion in Philadelphia,
Alth Mr. Roosevelt's "race suicide"
.lieoi ii's.
"The fact is," said Prof. Nenring,
aughing. 'these race suicide folk
hlnk sentimentally rather than nn
ilytlcally. They are deceived by sen
iinent, as a certain New York' police
commissioner once was.
"This commissioner, a fine young
jiun, found it his unpleasant duty to
it in judgment on a police officer who
had got drunk. When the officer ap
peared to plead before the commis
sioner he had 14 children with him,
ranging in years from 15 to 3 or 414
children, neatly if plainly clad, quite
crowding the commissioner's office,
and looking up in the policeman's face
with anxiouB, affectionate eyes.
" 'You are charged with drunken
ness. What have you got to say for
yourself?" the commissioner said
sternly to the guilty officer.
"The man gathered the 14 children
to him with a solemn, sweeping ges
ture of paternal love.
'"Mr. Commissioner, he answered
proudly, from the midst of the group,
'these children have no mother that
is what I have to say.'
"Thereupon, touched to the heart,
the young commissioner let the man
off for how was he, in his sentimen
tal pity, to know that the policeman
had borrowed the children from
friends?"
Saturday nights the ovens are turned
Into a nice source of revenue other
wise. Every family has its large bean
crock, and every Saturday night they
are loaded and carried to the nearest
bakery oven ready for an all night so
journ In the public oven. By morning
they are deliclously cooked and ready
to serve for breakfast. Tho charge is
10 cents a bean pot for its repose in
the ovens, and it's n poor Saturday
when they don't have nt least 30
Brookllne Sunday breakfasts to cook
In each bakery."
A DIFFERENT COLOR.
Task for Reporter.
"Covering a story" Is a newspaper
expression with a w ide range of mean
ing. The other afternoon a facetious
cil.- editor stretched it a bit. "Mr.
Jinks." he said to one of his reporters.
some one down on street has
Just been seriously hurt by failing
into an open manhole; will you go
down and cover it?"
Horrible Pun.
In the rathskeller a crowd of stu
dents were bawling out popular songs,
keeping time with their beer mugs.
"Those boys are good in mathemat
ics," said the man who was safely
entrenched behind a stein and a lira-
burger sandwich. "They are very
fond of lagerrhythms." Gateway.
INCIDENT THAT MADE A HIT
Self In Everything.
Let ns always remember that noth
ing befalls us that Is not of the nature
of ourselves. There comes no adven
ture but wears to our soul the shape
of our everyday thoughts; and deeds
of heroism are only offered to those
who have, for many long years, been
heroes In obscurity and silence. And
whether you climb up the mountain
or go down the hill to the valley,
whether you Journey to the end of the
world or merely walk around your
house, none hut yourself shall you
meet on the highway of fate. If Ju
das go forth to-night, it is toward Ju
das, his steps will tend, nor will chance
for betrayal be lacking; but let Socra
tes open bis door, be shall find Socra
tes asleep on the threshold before him
and there will be occasion for wisdom.
Maeterlinck.
Music Doctoring.
"Is it possible for me to obtain a
Doctor of Music degree in this col
lege?" "It Is. We confer the degree of
Doctor of Music on all who graduate
from the piano-tuning class."
"How was the blonde when you saw
ber last night?"
"She wasn't."
"Wasn't what?"
"A blonde."
"Woman Educators.
Intelligent women should be consult
ed In matters of education generally
and In the treatment and dlclpline of
children especially. But more particu
larly are they the best Judges of the
education of girls and the subjects
they should be taught. The great ma
jority of public school teachers are
women and it might bo well to have
women on tho governing board, with
whom these teachers can confer more
freely than they can with men. Balti
more Sun.
Hypnotism and Marriage.
A Georgian complains that his wife
"has hypnotized him." That Is a habit
women have. Otherwise there would
bo no marriage. Charleston News
and Courier.
Strange Sight of Ants.
It was proved long ago that ants
have the power of seeing the to hu
man beings invisible rays of the ultra-violet
portion of the spectrum.
They fear the light for their larvae
and when allowed choice between dif
ferent degrees of light always carry
then: to the darkest place accessible
When given the choice between a
compartment lighted with yellow light
and one dark to human eyes, but un
der the actinic ray, the ants unhesi
tatingly choose the yellow light, show
ing that to their eyes it is darker than
the other, to man invisible.
The Philosopher of Folly.
"We waste lots of time," says the
Philosopher of Folly, "doing things
before they are started, and then
doing doing them again after they are
done."
Russians Lovers of Music.
As patrons of music the Russians
are only second to the Germans; they
are devotees of the theater, where
musical productions are the chief
sources of amusement, and the poor
est peasant manages to cheer the dull
hours in his lowly home with an ac
cordeon or some other cheap Instrument.
Lazy Man's Tribulations.
"De lazy man," said Uncle Eben,
"tries to save trouble an' merely suc
ceeds In savin' it bp so's to git It in
a bunch."
THE
THE FUNNY 8IDE.
Life Is fu.'l of tunny things-
Jukes nut oi our muklng,
To euch act noma humor cling
i'o set sluts tt-Bhuking.
Never mluU how dark the day
There's some pleuHure In it;
Each sad hour thul tomes our way
lias Its funny inlnule.
If hard luck has swept your path,
Surging like a river.
Don't give vent to tears or wrath
Smile and suve your liver.
Somewhere In the direst need
Want of friends or money
You'll be sure to strike a lead
Toward the point Unit's funny.
If perforce, each sense you own
Suffers malnutrition,
Always keep your funny bone
Klght In prime condition.
If some power you must Invoke
In life's perturbation.
Let it be to iee the joke
In each situation.
-Lurami W. Beldon, In New York
Times.
Woman's Body Petrified.
' Death from gradual petrification, the
body slowly hardening for a year until
the flesh became as adamant as
marble and proof against incisions,
was the report made in the case of
Mrs. Catherine Barrow, 48 years old,
of Rosedale, La., who succumbed in
the Charity hospital.
"Business" Not Included in Actor's
Part Certainly Was Enjoyed
by the Audience.
Before he arrived at stardom Wilton
Lackaye once went on the road in a
temperance play of the "Ten Nights
in a Barroom" variety.
"We stopped one night in a town
where the theater had been evolved
from a huge barn and was shaky in
its timbers," said Mr. Lackaye. "In
the third act my lines Included a
fierce denunciation of 'cursed liquor.'
"The audience was large and friend
ly and I got considerably wrought up.
At last I started in on my peroration.
Behold,' I Bald, 'the serpent of drink,'
and I pointed up at the boughs of a
tree overhanging the stage. 'See his
bloodshot eyes. He is preparing to
spring down upon a victim. Now be
baa dropped to the ground. He tries
to strike, but I will prevent him. I
will crush him at one blow!' And
with that I raised my foot, let It drop
with all my force and the next instant
I had fallen through a large hole In
the stage and only my bead and shoul
ders were visible to the astonished
audience.
"But the 'most unklndest cut of all'
came when I had regained my feet.
" 'Say, mister,' piped up a small boy
in the rear, 'did ye kill him?'
"And the aduience, which had not
refrained from merriment when I
plunged downward, laughed so long
and heartily that I was unable to con
tinue for fully five minutes."
Baked Beans Economically Cooked.
. Having a young couple from a Bos
ton suburb to dinner a New York
hostess baked beans for them and dur
ing the meal complained that it was a
costly thing to cook them all day in
the gas range.
"We get around that very nicely In
Brookllne," said the visitor. "All the
bakeries there make a specialty of
catering to the habit of the residents
of having baked beans for Sunday
JiltntliSt Ai they cook nanmrl on
8
VACUUM CLEANER
Come to our store and let us show you what our wonderful hand-power So E-Z
Vacuum Cleaner will do for you. The price is right, the weight is right, the result is
right. Operated by hand, cannot get out of order, gets all the dirt, saves carpets and
rugs.
Besides the above we have a full supply of Xew Needles, Shuttles and Bobbins,
Belts, etc. for all Machines made and can get you any repairs that you may want for
your machine. We also have some of the best sewing machine oil on the market.
At our. store you will also find a full line of Porch Seats and Swings, Hammocks,
Lawn Swings and Seats.
But now that house cleaning begins, remember that we have a full line of Rugs,
Carpets, Fiber Japanese and Chinese Mattings, at prices to suit the purchaser. We
are in a position to show you different patterns of Linoleum. When you have your
House cleaned then you will be apt to want some new Furniture, of which we have a
complete stock to select from, at prices that are absolutely right.
We sell the Stearns & Foster Cotton Felt Mattresses they are guaranteed and
are the best manufactured. Come in and examine our Mattresses.
WTe also sell the Domestic Sewing Machine one of the best manufactured,
have three grades at the following prices: &r. $40 and $45.
You will soon want Refrigerators. Come in and look over our line. We
some fine ones.
We
have
CHA
House Furniture and Undertaking
Ml
HILD
Plattsmouth, Nebraska