III). fl &T&7KAS3jrj0L. iTTVJW Il '. I I'll ' r7 Lsftil r III ' 1)1 IV 111 !?JSf 1 ,1
I SK ANY gray-haired
A retired-list American
I soldier in Washington
for an array story and
I 1.... .....!.. 1. -.Ml -1 .. ...
UIHlUllliJT I1U Hill bliUL
to tell you of the talo
of Lieut. Michael Fitz
(iera!ds dinner party.
It la a favorite nrmy
yarn, but not often
does it find Its way
outside of the circle of
the blue.
Lieut. Michael Fltz
Gerald became Major
Michael FltzGerald In
course of time and because of wounds
received In the very forefront of a
battle for bis adopted country ho was
placed upon the retired list of the
army. He died within a few months
at bis quiet little home town In Penn
sylvania. ' The dinner of Lieut. FitzCerald was
nn international episode. Some of
the elders will remember that It was
not until shortly after the close of
the civil war that the last echo was
heard of the dispute between Great
Britain and the United States over
territory In the northwest. The ques
tion of the ownership of the islands
between Vancouver and Washington
territory was still unsettled. The two
governments In order not to lose pres
tige felt It necessary to maintain gar
a I retired-Hat American fiUMfo (Ot t ,
A I soldier In Washington ijj Mk XW
f I f'"" an array story and ' Jff(lhi'-' Xvl'Jih'
I Instantly ho will start MlTy)(
1 1 to tell you of the talo ;tifoi&&$r'$ lPhlfh
NL (ilral(1B dinner party. intk 'Ayvlfll
ygj!? It la a favorite nrmy jfy 'mpS Cv-'-sr 1 jyl
outside of the circle of -W fljl
f Lieut. Michael FItz- iW' I 9 Hull!
L V Oerald became Major f llfj:M 1 1 V UH
risons on tlio disputed grounds.
The United States was represented by one
company of the old Ninth Infantry, command
ed by Second Lieut. Michael FitzCerald. Fltz
Gerald was the only American commissioned
officer In the field. Not far away from his
headquarters were two companies of British
regulars with a full complement of ofllcers.
! Before FltzGerald and his command were
'sent to the Island, occupied In part by the
Urltish, Gen. McDowell, who coimnnnded the
division of the Paclllc, sent for the second
lieutenant for the purpose of Impressing upon
him the delicate nature of his mission.
! "Above all things, Mr. FltzGerald," said
the general, "observe the rules of International
courtesy."
; "I'll -do It, general," answered the second
lieutenant promptly, "and no war will grow
out of my treatment of the red coats."
1 The British and American garrisons were
only a few miles apart. When Lieut. Fitz
- Gerald finally became comfortably fixed In his
quarters nud was feeling the full weight of
being not only rompuny commander but com
manding officer of a United States garrison as
., vel, lie was called upon in turn by each of
the half-dozen red-coated otllcers stationed be
' ' 1 yond the hill. FltzGerald returned the calls ,
promptly and shortly thereafter ho was In
, vltcd to diiio with the six Englishmen as his
' hosts.
' At' that dinner the American lieutenant
!,i ,;Kas entertained royally. There was nothing
In tho British garrison that was too good for
, , him, and. ns tho veterans say to day, "Fitz
1 . Gerald afterward told his comrades In the
.states, 'It was a wet night." "
I ; When rilzueraid returned to his quarters
i ' ani fiiron n-pnua linn niiRAtwi nu-nv lu mn.in tin
U ! j Ms, mind that It was time to prepare to return
In some' way tho hospitality of the English
t nion.'; He took an account of the provender at
band and found that the supply at his disposal
i wei'e the-ordinary jarmy rations und a Jug
" 'of whisky. i;; j , , , .
! ' There was notjhiijg lit fof U banquot such
' " ,m FltzGerald wa jo give, nearer than Ban
Francisco. The tcind lleuteijtin. was a man
,f '(dxpod Rents' Tfte iexfJfSatfW Sfrfj Pranrlsec
.cu'rfled' some1 coujfmJinlcatlonB to certain snp-
tyr hOUseSt-tniloQC iwng nflnnmard IhQ sup
mmam
plies arrived
at FltzGerald'B
quarters.
The American
officer was no
mere dinner
giver. The In
vitations which
lie sent to the
six British of
llcers were en
graved, bore the
arms of the
United States
in colors and
announced a
banquet.
It took Lieut.
FltzGerald a
full week to un
pack the boxes
which had come
from San Fran
cisco. He told
about 10 of his
enlisted men
that It would
not do for an
American offi
cer to be out
done in hospi
tality by the
British. Forth
with he 1 n
structed them
carefully In du
ties as waiters.
He picked out of the command five men who
had some music In their souls and provided
them with instruments.
When the British officers arrived and pre
liminary courtesies had been exchanged they
were shown Into a banquet hall with a table
In Its center glittering with silver and with
cut glass. The red-coats ate of delicacies and
of substantial thnt none of them thought
could bo found nearer than New York, and
they drank wine of the kind that needs no
bush.
There were two waiters for every gueBt,
and five enlisted men fiddled away and blew
at their Instruments throughout the 20
courses of the dinner. There were toasts and
toasts and toasts, and it was not all over until
about an hour after the host had excused him
self temporarily to attend reveille roll call.
Then came the cold gray light of the week
after. The Joy of remembrance of the ban
quet had kept Lieut. FltzGerald's heart up for
the week that had passed. Then the bills
came In from San FranclBco. In amount they
were $1,400. Second Lieut. FltzGerald's ban
quet had cost $200 a plate.
If the lieutenant should pay the bills the
banquet would mean bankruptcy. The com
manding officer of the Island post passed a
night in thought. In the morning there was a
look of relief upon his face. In an hour's time
there was ready for transmission to Gen. Mc
Dowell In San Francisco a largo official en
velope marked in large letters In red Ink "In
ternational Courtesies."
' Inclosed were tho bills for pate do fole
gras, raro old Burgundy and other things
which never before had found their way to the
northwestern coast. With the Inclosures went
this, written In Lieut. Michael FltzGerald's
own hand: "Excerpt from MaJ.-Gen. McDow
ell's Instruction: 'Above all things, Mr. Flti
Gerald, observe the rules of International
courtesies.' "
Gen. McDowell fumed, and tradition has It
that ho swore, but he ordered that the bills
bo paid out of the contingent fund, and tho
memory of that banquet In the wilds of one
of the Islands which flow forms part of San
Juan county, In the state of Washington, Uvos
..to this day In the minds of several veterans
r
1)
0 Ri ? E DB K ACT
EODOOCDDEE (3DR)
BCDECDEEIB' ooo
of the English service, and
has a place in the story
telling groups of the Amer
ican army ns "an interna
tional episode."
In Arlington cemetery,
Just ncrss the Potomac
from Washington lies the
body of John G. Bourke,
who In life was an officer
of the fighting Third cav
alry. Major Bourke's last
tour of active duty was in Chicago during the
railroad strike of 1894. The cavalryman
found time aside from his soldier duties to
study the folklore of the North American In
dians with whom he fought and was friendly
alternately, as the government would have It,
for years on years of life in the west.
Major Bourke was an active member at
ono time of the American association which
makes folklore study a specialty. He was in
terested not only In the Inherited tribal tales
of the Sioux and the Apache, but he took
within his study scope the folklore of all prim
itive peoples.
Into the side of the great stone monument
erected to the memory of Gen. Crook and
which stands near Major Bourke's grave In
Arlington cemetery is set a bronze panel show
ing the scene of the surrender of the Apaches
under Gcronlmo to Crook In tho Sierra Madres
23 years ago. The faces of tho Indians and
of the army officers shown are portraits. One
of the officers In the group Is John G. Bourke,
and there Is a story In connection with the
folklore major and the Geronlmo campaign
which others besides folklore people possibly
may appreciate.
There had been a fight at long range with
the Apaches In the mountains and Bourke's
troop, dismounted, had been engaged. When
the fight was over and the Apaches who es
caped killing had made for farther mountain
fastnesses, aB was their custom, the troopers
moved forward and found one Indian who had
been shot between the eyes, the bullet coming
out at the back of his head. It is needless to
say, perhaps, that the Apache brave was dead.
Gen. Crook came up and found Major, then
Captain, Bourke saying n few warm things to
one of the duty sergeants of his troop. Bourke
left the sergeant, and Crook, turning to the
cavalry captain, said: "Bourke, what on earth
has Sergeant Casey been doing this time?"
"Doing, general!" exclaimed Bourke wrath
fully. "Doing enough; I tried for five years to
make a sharpshooter out of Casey, and at the
end of the time he couldn't hit the bnrracks
if he was inside with the doors and windows
shut.
"And yet, general, that fellow Casey here
to-day at a clean 900 yards plugged and killed
the only Apache In this whole southwestern
country who could have given me the folklore
story I've been after for years.
"I tell you, general, that Casey has escnped
court-martial only by swearing the shot was a
scratch."
It takes only a casual reader of the army
orders which are published dally In Washing
ton to make It known thnt more than one de
serter who has been caught succeeds In escap
ing the punishment due him by sheer force of
the picas, pathetic and otherwise, which
friends make for him. Occasionally there are
exteuuatlng circumstances even In the cases
of deserters; but desertion is desertion, no
matter how it Is viewed, and clemency is not
looked upon with' favor by either regimental
or company commnnders, and in truth the de
serters generally escape punishment, when
they do escape, through the Boft-heartedness
of civilian secretaries of war.
It Is said that occasionally deserters write
to the wife of the president of the United
States asking that she intercede for them with
her husband. This plan worked once, but if
the facts in tho caso are known to the pres
ent mistress of the White House It Is probable
that the letters of deserters caught and await
ing trial will receive scant attention..
The Btory of a deserter who appealed to a
president's wife, and ho did not appeal In
vain, is a Fort Sheridan Btory. In the year
1890, Just as the snow was beginning to fly in
the fall, a young fellow went from Chicago to
Fort Sheridan aud there gave himself up as
a deserter. It Is probable that the cold weath-
OPYEK5HT BV W. A . R4TTE R SON .
er and lack of money had much to do with
the former soldier's surrender to the authori
ties. The records were looked up and It was
found that the man was what he declared him
self to be a deserter, and nothing less. He
was locked In the guardhouse to await trial,
and the waiting was not long, for a court-martial
was convened and the result of the offi
cers' deliberations was a sentence of four
years in Fort Leavenworth for the prisoner.
Then it was that the deserter began to
think he had been a fool to give himself up
and he began to think of something else ns
well. It was Just a week before Christmas
when the prisoner sat down in has cell and
wrote a letter to Mrs. Benjamin Harrison,
White House, D. C. Afterward a fellow pris
oner of the deserter said that he had been
allowed to read the letter before it was sent
to Washington and thnt it was such an appeal
ing epistle that it made him weep. Mrs. Har
rison was told how hard It was to be In prison
during the glad Christmastide, when the world
was bright from the reflection of happy faces,
and when, If ever, pardon should come to the
erring.
The president's wife received the letter
and was so touched that she made It a point
at once to Interest her husband in the case.
The result was that President Harrison par
doned the prisoner. The young fellow was
released and by permission he stayed around
the bnrrackB at Fort Sheridan a few hours
before leaving for Chicago.
When ho left he carried away all the
money which a sergeant of F company had
been saving for a year to use on furlough. The
pardoned one also took a gold watch belong
ing to tho first sergeant of the same company.
That deserter never was caught, and as far
as It is known he never again gave himself
" up to the authorities. There was more than a
rumor at the time, however, that two enlisted
men in the United States army Baw to It that
the tale of tho deserter's deeds waa sent io
the White House in order that the president's
wife might learn that even a woman and a
president's wife may sometimes mistake hu
man nature.
CONDENSED COURTESY.
Wise Club Member Wheatcaked German Bar.
on Instead of Wineing and Dining Him.
A German baron he Bald blew Into New
York and got acquainted with some clubmen.
He was put up at a club by one of them for
the customary two weeks and paid his bills
promptly.
There was great surprise when tho man
who put him up refused to make nn applica
tion for a renewal of the courtesies of the club
for the baron. Club members were Indignant
about It and ono of them had a new card
issued.
The baron appreciated the compliment and
entertained lavishly. He left without paying
his bills and tho member who volunteered tho
second time had to settle.
"Did you lose anything?" he asked the
man who had stood sponsor first time.
"No," he said. "I didn't wine and dine him,
like yon. I took him out one day and wheat
caked him." Saturday Evening Tost.
A BOOKMARK CHURCH.
In Japan, under the guidance of Rev. David
S. Spencer as presiding elder, many of the
native churches have been engaged In a strong
effort toward self-support. The Toyohnshl
church was built of the proceeds of the salo
of silk bookmarks made by tho members of
the congregation. These silk Blips with tas
sels were sold by friends In other lands. Some
of the workers made elegant embroidered silk
handkerchiefs, which are also sent for sale
among the people of the home land. The Ja
panese are showing themselves In labors and
patience true types of the Chrlstlun.
Windy Wills.
As a contrast to tho short will of E. II.
Ilarrimnn, one might mention the will of the
late Ix)rd Grlmthorpe, In the framing of which
no fewer than 11,070 words wero used; and
thnt of Mr. Edward Bush, a retired Gloucester
engineer, who died last autumn worth 114,
813, and disposed of It In a' will containing
26,000 AvordB. Strand.
TMJE
Wilbur D Nesbit
9
Ti
mmium
niiTiin
v
Tlilth here front luoth w'y, It wath
lootlie
Tlmt 1th, the front tooth that wath
here
Where thlth Iktc hole Ith; Vauthe tlis
tooth
Ith gone now, that 'th what looktlt tho
queer.
An' tny nia thlie timid If I would
Go where the dentitht 1th, an' bo
Real brave an" big an' awful good
An' get It pulled thhe'd jut lit love mol
But I'm afraid, an' I won't go.
An" tho my pa he luuch an' thald
He'd be the dentitht, cuutho he know
The way to pull a tooth with thread.
An' he wropped thread around th' tooth.
Hut when he'th go to pull It out
I wrlKh'lo till th' thread eome lootlie
An' won't let my pa eome about.
An' my aunt Time thhe thay tht'th right?
That little boyth '1th full o'nerveth
An' oiiKhtn't to be Rive a fright
Tho long ath gentle patlcntho therveth
The purpothel an' she athked me let
Iter thee the tooth but when thhe try
To thhake It till It will upthet
It thcuro me till I purt' near cry.
Nen pa be thcold an' ma thhe thay
It'th thilly to bo thueh a calf.
An' my aunt Thue thhe turn away
An' luiiKh an' laugh an' laugh an'
latiKh
At all of uth! An' pa get mad
An' my ma thhe aetth kind o' croth
An' thay 'at I'm a aetln' bad
An' pa thay for nie not to thauthe.
Tho bye an' bye they let me bo
An' after whllo I go to thleep
Nex' mornin' what you th'pothe I theet
W'y, thlth hero tooth! An' now I keep
It packed away with all my thlngth
In thlth here box up on the thhelf
With all my niarhleth. topth and rlngth
Tuuthe It'th a tootht that pull itthelfl
A Good Samaritan.
A man with red eyes and red nose
and red hair stood at the side of tho
street and sneezed dolefully. It was
not one of these surprise sneezes that
creep upon us unawares. Not one of
these tltlllant sneezes that cause us
to pucker the nose and w ink the eyes
and catch the breath and then kachoc
at the top of the voice from sheer Joy
in sneezing. That sort of sneeze. la
not vouchsafed to us every day. That
sort of sneeze comes infrequently. We
do not care then if we have been sit
ting In a draught. Nor If we have
gotten our feet wet. The point Is
that we have sneezed. Most of us re
joice in St.. A sneeze of that kind we
will render gloriously and valiantly
as who should say to all the world:
"Listen and hear what sneezing Is
when it Is dono by the boss sneezer
of the universe."
We left the man with the red eyes
and nose and hair at the side of the
street sneezing, but It does not mat
ter. We could ro away and Ubre
him there four weeks and he would
sneeze with the Impersonal, disinter
ested, mechanical regularity of a
cuckoo cuckooing In a cuckoo clock.
The man had hay fever.
To him came a man with kindly
eyes and pleasant smiles. This man
said:
"You have hay fever, have you not?"
Tho other man sneezed.
"Tell you how I cured myself," said
the stranger. "I suffered from it until
I hit on tho Idea of cutting my hair
with a lawn mower."
Rut tho sufferer merely sneezed
sadly.
Dangerous Nowadays.
"Mr. Munneysax," says tho dignified
stranger, entering the private office
of the plutocrat, "I have here a"
With a quick glance Mr. Munney
sax sees the stranger hns In his hand
a document of some sort, and Immedi
ately leaps through tho window and
Is away. With tho same promptness
nttendant3 leap upon the stranger and
bear him to the floor, when they
wrest from him the document.
"Lemme up!" cries tho stranger.
"That's a pretty way to treat the
chairman of a committee to Invite Mr.
Munneysax to be the guest of honor
at a banquet."
Couldn't Fool Her.
"Miss Brown," asks the austere
chaperon, "what would you do If a
young man should ask you for a
kiss?"
"Now, don't try to make me think
you have lived as long as you have
and haven't mnstered that subject!"
giggles Miss Brown.
jlr
