The Spirit Moved Him.
An old negro ireachpr approached
southern physlIan and offered a
scrap of paper.
"I'lease, salt, read dat," he said.
The physician found it to be an ad
vertisement In which It was assorted
that whisky was the only genuine uud
reliable specific for malaria.
"Hut you haven't any malaria,
uncle," he assured the old man; "none
of It around hen at all."
"Wliar do dey hah it de wust, Mars'
JecnisT" the old man asked, curiously.
"It's pretty bad down on the Cy
press river," the physician told him,
naming a locality some 20 miles away.
A few days later the physician was
passing the old fellow's cabin and ob
served hlrn climbing upon a rickety
old wagon piled high with household
goods.
"Moving, Uncle Ned?" he said.
"Where are you going?"
"Mars' Jeems," the old man said,
solemnly. "Ah done had a call; de
peril done move, me to go wuck in
da Lord's vineyard on de banks ob
Cypress libber!" Harper's Weekly.
Tribute to French Wives.
French girls make good wives. The
French bride is comparatively less ex
travagant than her llritlsh or Ameri
can sister. Where the llritlsh wife re
quires f t a week, the Amerlcau wifa
$18 or $20 a week for the housekeep
ing, the French wife will manage ad
mirably on Jl.'JO. The Frenchwoman
does not regard her husband' as a
mere money making machine and her
lioiiso simply as a plnco to sleep in.
As soon as sho is married she is her
husband's partner In business as well
as in private life. She considers it
Ler duty to make herself acquainted
with every detail of her husband's busi
ness. No French husband will think
of taking nny important step without
first consulting his wife, and her ad
vice is often amazingly shreWd.
Try to Break Into Station.
An attempt was made to break Into
the Turlington station at Heaver City
at 11 o'clock Monday night. The
ngent lives over the depot and was
awakened by the, noise made by the
burglars who were trying to foicu an
entrance, through one of tho windows
to the ticket office. Mr. Irwin, tho
agent, telephoned to the sheriff, who
c rganhed a posse and started for the
Elation, which is nearly a half mile
from town. His approach was no
ticed by tlio Intruders and they made
a1 hasty retreat to the east and were
not captured. There was n consider
able sum of motley on hand at the
time, which is mpposed to have been
known to them. N'o cluo to their
Identity has been discovered.
THOSE DEAR GIRLS ; -ft
AND THE RUDE CROWD AT THE
TICKET OFFICE.
.1
Violent Method of Courtship.
W. I'ett nidge, the English novelist,
Js a good story teller, and most of his
stories concern people in the poorer
ranks of life, and by far the greater
number of them have tho merit of be
ing truo. Tho following contains a
rare touch of human nature, and
speaks for itself. A certain club for
working girls in the East end of Lon
don had recently elected a new mem
ber, and one day tho secretary hap
pened to look out of the window,
and was surprised to see the new mem
ber rush up to a strange lad in the
street, punch him violently on the
head, and then run away. The secre
tary remonstrated with her sharply,
to which the new member mado re
ply: "I'm very sorry; I won': do it no
more, ff it's ngln the rules; but per
haps you won't mind telling me, then,
how am I ever to get engaged?"
A Glbsonlsm.
Dave Gibson delivers himself of this
epigram, which we grab off before he
gets a chance to print it:
"Tho business of a business man is
to see that his employes attend to it."
Cleveland Leader.
'For Annual Registration.
City. Clerk Ilrntton and City Attor
ney Button, of Hastings, are preparing j
measure for submission to the legls-j
lature providing for registration of
voters In Hastings and other cities
from 7,000 to 23.000 population, after
the manner of that now provided for
Uncoln and Omaha. Under tho pres
ent laws applying to Hastings, and
other cities In the class named, onlv
those voters who have moved from j
ne ward to another, first voters and
new voters are required to register.
Once registered a person need pay no
further attention to registration un
less he moves Into another ward. As
ft result of this inadequate method of
registration the books contain about
2,500 names while the largest vote
ever cast in Hastings was approxi
mately 2,000. The proposed measure
will be provided for annual registra
tion of all voters.
Immense Normandy Apple Crop.
This year will go down to posterity
In Normandy as tho apple year. Never
until this year has a Normandy farmer
been known to express satisfaction
with his crop. His usual answer about
it is thnt "for a year where there are
no apples there are apples, but for a
year where there are apples there are
no apples to speak of." This vague
ness is a Norman peculiarity. You
cannot get a "yes" or "no" in answer
to a question from a Norman peasant.
"Well, perhaps yes," or, "After all, per
haps not," is the nearest, he will ever
go to a positive assertion. But this
year he admits to a gootl apple crop.
During the past month 50,000 railway
truck loads of apples have been sent
along the Western lino as against
C,000 truck's last year.
Good Advice.
The Tenderfoot (in the mining town
out west) Alkali Ike lias forged my
name to a check.
Old Inhabitant Take a tip and say
nothing. Alknll Ike is a dead shot
and always ready to defend his houcr.
Mr. Whittier'a Haymaker.
Maud Muller was raking the hay.
"Of course, I could havo the hired
man do it," she explained, "but this
is what catches the summer board
era."
Herewith she waved her hand at the
Judge.
H-H"H-K;--H--K--H--H--W
. Attention Farmers and Stock Raisers! I
4-
Horses, Cattle, Sheep and Hog Salvet or medi-
cated Salt is the best remedy for all kinds of f
stock to make them tat well and aid digestion
and also a blood builder. If not satisfied with re- t
suits money refunded. Sold at the feed store of
EHaanHEsnna
j. v. egenberger
PLATTSMOUTH, NEBRASKA.
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In George Washington's Time
Age of Chivalry Surely Dead When
Men Object to Missing Their .
Trains to Accommodate Fair
Femininity.
It was one of the branch offices of a
Dig railroad. As the man ahead of her
Iherw down his money, grabbed his
ticket and disappeared, sho fluttered
up to the counter.
"I want to gut my trunk chocked,
please."
"Let me see your ticket, miss."
"O, Clare, wu forgot to get my
ticket," turning to the girl with her.
"So we did. Now will have to
Bo all the way back."
"You can get your ticket ht-re, miss."
"O, Clare, 1 can get my ticket here.
Isn't it lovely?"
"Just happened to havo a few odd
lots on hand," grinned some brute be
hind her. "It's bargain day, you know.
Ali tickets reduced to f 1.&8!"
"What does that rude creature
mean, Clare?"
"I don't enow, dear. Don't pay any
attention to him."
"Where to, miss?" Inquired the
ticket agent at this point.
"New York."
"Round trip?"
"O, I wait a moment. Clare, I
cover thought about that. Would you
get a r,und trip? You know the How
ards may only be In New York a week,
and I may go on with them te Pitts
burg. They have been begging me to
for weeks, but if Mabel's wedding
should come off by tho 30th, I'll want
lo go to that. I shouldn't be a bit sur
prised though if she postponed it
Bgaln, but "
"Round trip, miss?" asked the ticket
agent again, while tho waiting line of
iiien and women stood on the other
foot.
"O, Clare, what would you do? I
am wild to go to Pittsburg with the
Howards "
"And we are wild to have yon go,"
suddenly yelled a man at the extreme
end of the line, whose train left in 20
minutes.
"Try Pittsburg." yelled another
voice. "You have to change every
thing there every hour or so, and you
can Include your mlud without any ex
tra Inconvenience."
"Oh. no," shrieked another frantic
Individual, "go to Mabel's wedding. I
am dying to have you go. What, Ma
Del?" ,
"Clare, did you pver see such dread
ful people. I shall report you at the
main office," and she glared at the
ticket agent.
"Yes. miss," returned that individual
In nn expressionless voice.
"Round trip?"
"No. single," haughtily.
"What time? The next call la be
tween 11 and 12."
"Oh, my trunk Isn't pack-od yet. I
could never get it ready in that time."
"Next call between 2 and 4."
"Very well, have the man call for
my trunk at 3, then I can take the 2
o'clock train." .
"You would not have your check,
miss?"
"Why not? I can get the check when
the man conies for my trunk."
"Hut you won't be there if you go
on the 2 o'clock train and ho doesn't
come until 3."
"Oh." A long pauso.
"Clare, I won't be there. What
Bhall I do? l)o you think I could get
my trunk ready by 12? "ou know
they never come when they say they
will."
"1 think you could, dear. I'll pack
one tray for you and we'll phono for
Jlelen to come and help us, and "
"Say, look here," shouted an excited
person in the rear, whose hair was
standing wildly on end and whose
eyes appeared to bo endeavoring to
sever their connecting links with his
face. "I've got Just 20 minutes to
make my train In, and It's a matter of
J40.000 to me if I lose it. Now If
'(Mara' and her friend will retire for a
few moments and decide these mo
mentous questions the rest of us can
get our tickets before she has time to
change her mind again."
".Clare, I'll not stay here another
moment and bo insulted. I shall not
i:et my ticket at this oiflce, and I Fhall
certainly report you, sir, at headquar
ters. I will never go on this road
again and I shall tell all my friends
how I have been treated, and see that
Ihey take their custom elsewhere."
and then she and Clare swept haught
ily from tho olllce, while tho crowd
chec red.
As the two disappeared tho ticket
agent winked at the crowd, and then
began throwing out tickets and mak
ing change, as each man yelled his
destination, tossed him his money nud
Snatching his ticket sprinted out of
'.he door with his coat tails standing
mt straight and his suit case cittlng
long streaks out of 'the atmosphere.
Puck.
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; immy for
J the Harvest
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There was no tr.ik of adulteration and jrrr.cery si ores
only t.tapK s table delioacicit wtro few 'ard far
between. Well, this i-toiv fti oiv- is old fa-binned as
to its ideas of lr.iity. ivw style i:i that it lias on hand
the best of cveryil.ir;: for the table brought from the
marts of tho world. W'v. woi.lvi like to name yon
amon;r our patrons.
i i nines undone.
I Knowing Cl'.IM .Mar.inia pmibliCil '
I mo for s
f 1 t.i-lay.
I Aitftl.-
: yo'i sure?
' Knowing
f 1 lo be:
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oinoi hiug 1 h.al'l't i'ouo ye3'
That's rather, unjust. A;-e
Child Yes. r.ho iHii.lrlied ;
j I hadn't do;.. my Its-
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A Soft Ar&v.er.
'00 Wl:nl did vou tell vour fi'.'.her
! i wni'a ne a; ieci cu u you iihiih!.'"ii :
12 1 old him I took only ginger rile
':; Thcught n soft niiwcr would
a:;n away wrath. i.UT
L
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The farmers are getting ready for the harvest,
are you? Do you know that there is more money in
threshing than in any other business it offers greater
'opportunities a business that requires comparatively
small capital is easily conducted and pays a hand
some percentage on the investment if you buy
wisely and exercise ordinary judgment in the opera
tion of your machinery? To those not satisfied with
the result of the past year's work who feel they
have not bought wisely we have only one word of
advice buy a CASE outfit, one that can be operated
year in and year out at a profit under more varied
conditions than any other threshing machinery on
earth. A CASE Separator is a separator that threshes
all the grain leaves it in perfect condition thor
oughly cleaned and ready for the market, giving the
grain grower a positive knowledge that when his
grain has been threshed by a CASE Separator, he has
received his entire crop unbroken, and in the best pos
sible condition, insured him the highest grade, and
the best market prices.
uty " '.,oJ
Simplicity, efficiency, durability, these have been
our guiding stars. Rejecting always tho complicated
for the simple we have succeeded in building an en
gine that is remarkable for its extreme simplicity and
correct scientific construction its ease of operation
its low fuel consumption and ' its adaptability to all
uses. Owin to the perfect distribution of weight
and their great power our traction engines are won
perful hill climber and can be operated in all sections
of the country over all kinds of roads. , A CASE en
gine will develope more power per rated horse-power
than any other engine rated the same. A 54-inch
Steel Separator 32x32 inch cylinder and a 15 horse
power Engine would sell for about $2,000. See me
for catalogues and prices.
" rfl -Ai rf- r-n-s
K'tn Manspeakeri
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