The Plattsmouth daily herald. (Plattsmouth, Nebraska) 1883-19??, March 04, 1892, Image 3
WMO Shall Is It Harrison? U It Cleveland? I ' U It Blaine? Is It Hill? OR 13 THERE ANY OTHER HAN YOU WANT FOR PRESIDENT OP THE UNITED STATES? NAME YOUR CHOICE! FARM f Blaine, McKinley, Gorman, Boies, Rusk, Wanamalcer. These portraits are in themselves beautiful This apc Is accepted with engraved portraits of either HARRISON, CLEVELAND. BLAINE, HILL, CRISP, WANAMAKER. McKTSLEY, GORMAN. RUSK. BOIES. Whichever you may select. works of art, really splendid pictures, JOURNAL JANUARY t as fine as any steel y. 'engraving, and in , no way an adver tisement. They will be an ornament to S I Ml T W T F S 1 2 8 4 5 6 7 8 9 IO 11 12 18 14 15 16 17 18 192021 22 28 24 25 26 27 28 29 80 31 -- -- 50 CENTS anyparlor, or office, wall, or desk, and This is a miniaturt of the Calendar. The site is $ by t inches. nvland man you vrill Calendar- if a Blaine man order a Calendar ; if a McKinley man order a 0 LET'S HAVE A VOTE! The Farm Journal is well known everywhere in the United States as one of the very liest Farm papers a perfect gem of a Family paper. It is cremn, not skim milk; it is the boiled-down paper; chuck-full of common-sense; hits the nail on the head every time. Every one who has a horse, or cow, or pig, or chicken, or has a farm big or little, frht to take the Farm Iournal. The j l fact that it has a popularity. It is to be honest, and LET'S HAVE A. VOTE I , . n,:., to vote, The harm Journal tor one year costs nom ,"?Sl"-ait calendar costs you but 10 cents, to merely Vrini"ntf. wrapping; mailing etc., provided that yon ie time Kor TnK Herald. Our clubbing terms with cover tne expense 01 f uDscriw ai nit- "c . the farm Journal are such that we cm WEEKLY 11EKA.U) Farm Journal, 'tt-r " President's portra calender, - ' Total for MM but ten cents more than yonr subscript you the Farm -H inrc for nres iontoTHEllERALDnaj "Jf," Portrait calendar (your Journal, 1 year, the presidents ,Virpnt in na without idenO for 3.) cents. Make remittance delay as this is a special ana exiraorainaryouer. savour rhnirn Don't forget in order ring calendar to state who ;syour cnoice for President, and which calendar you want, ADDRESS, PLATTSMOUTII, NEBRBSKA . . . - Circulation Lerge Rates Reasonable. Returns Remunerative PLATTSMOUTH HERALD Is q Weekly Pqbliccitioq of ligl qcl special liie qs cji ciel- seels to l'eqcli families tljiotigli Sates On. --lica,t: o.n.. A. B. KNOTT BUSINESS MANAGEK. BOl Cor Fifth PLA.TTSM O.UTH T?X CftOMESTEM'S EntUSM. It CD CAOAt Tt DlAMOHO 8 AMD THE RiaiNAL AN? KSumi. Tse SJ aee, nwttr SjreMet. -fee, aek ltiee" w tam MHfUtt Plmmmd M ie Keel ee4 iU eeeeHe kjM !! Wee Mfckaa. Teke ete easier feeeteV Mmn Jilim1i n and Mhm am siiei ee 1 1 mil I m. innwejeisinei nee lei Miv 1 1 rreisim aea ay sea 1 in mrwm- President? 1X1C f AKH lias, At laigc iajvii., designed and printed a beautiful Counting House Calendar for 1892, containing portraits of the leading Presidential possibilities : Cleveland, Harrison, Hill and Crisp, sennn- also rostmasrer-oenenL. 5 PORTRAIT after the Calendar is done are suitable for framing. They are sold, with or without the Cal- CALENDAR endar, for 25 cents each, to non-subscribers to Farm Journal. 35 CENTS want a Cleveland Blaine Calendar; if a Hill man order a Hill McKinley Calendar, and so on. r ----- j . e 1 round million readers bespeaks its wonderful the one paper that guarantees its advertisers protects its readers against fraud. furnish turnisn $i.ro. .50 .'2o $-.25 our" i '", W?"10 if . IY . and Vine St. - . NEBRASKA . id 1111 in 111 1 1. vr w 1 1 r.t-ii u ee .reeerfse Mothers Friend ; hkb on crani asy Oolrln.Is, X)MuSL188a.-My wife 09 KOTHXB'8 mm before hsr Uurd conflnsmeat, and say mhm would not hm without It for hundreds of dollars. DOCK MTXX4. Ssst by express oa .-eceipt of price, $IJM per bot tle. Book "To Mother "mailed free. mmADMBLa raqulatoh 00, roa sat av i"X mnutTt, ATUVtTA, OA. nnfltirjESSH'.H QWOKIpY THOROUGHLY, PORCVBR OUfKD aclentiflo method that cauuot fail unless the carfb beyond ho Jaa aid. Yon feel Irapixred the first day, feel at fr et ever? dar soon no yourself kin amona men la body, mind and heart. Dralnaaod losses nded. Kvery obstacle to happy married life re moTed. Nerre force, will, energy, brain power, when failing or lost are restored by this treat ment. All small and weak portions of tbe body en larged and strengthened. Victims of abuses and excesses, reclaim yonr manhood ! Sufferers from folly.OTerwork.UI health, regain your Tlaor! 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Stone il pain, lie at Xttuiete. or 1WSCOS CO., S. Y. How Lost t How Regained ICrnTIiiCELF. Or 8KLF-PHESERTATION. A new and onlv Gold Medal PKIZK ESSAY oa HIBTOD8 and PHT8ICAI. 'PgBIUTT. - KKBOBS of TOOTH, TetXHAPSTEP TITAUTT, PRK HATCBX DKCXXICK, and ail DIS BASKS and WKAKITXSSJU of XAlf . etMpafaa,ctoth. ut; 1 lavalasUa Brascrtptionc. Only &.M by maH, doable asafti. DaacrtpUte Pxoapact as with ndorMBBts fafirpe I crun zsxsr 3 v.olssz FliEE ! ioS? Consultation ia peraoa or by neil. Jbcpert treat, ment. INTIOLABLK SECRECY lad CIS 'he Pea bod Medical Iastitate. No. 4 Bulflnch fit. LUKK. Address Ur. W H wrmr nr Boston, Masa. The Peebody Madiaal lusUtute has asany imi tators, but no equal, t liirald. The 8ienee of Life, or Self-PreserraUoa, is a treasure more ralnable then rll . Read it now, every WEAK and NERVOI S man, and learn te be ITBOfi . Miiitai ftrm-. (Copyrtchted-i A VCRSATftllST. He was a aaappy-lookiDg yonng fel low of perhaps St. curly-haired, hand some, darkeyed, and dressed in the latest Beyle. Walking into an office in the Cincinnati Commercial QazeMt building, he carefully closed the door behind him. removed his glove, and remarked: "I was in town and thought I would drop in to see yon. "Yes?" interrogatively remarked the attorney. "Yes. I dropped in to see yon and now I should like to do something for you." "Oh. you would? Whatcan you do for me?" coldly returned the barrister. The young man made a graceful bow and produced his card: "McDonald Everett Vcratilistic artist and special ist. Painting Young ladies, lussnna one hour, free of charge; old maids. 6 and upward, depending upon first impressions. Musician and vocalist One night stands, $16; prices to vary according to si-Ae of hall, also size of audience. Correspondent (traveling or stationary) Sensational, 10 centa per line. Divorce cases written in flowing style, and eloquence utilized in case lady is in her teens or not too far gone beyond. Society scandal, $10 per column. Actor Shakspeare's productions $30 per night; $40 if egged. Other drama $1."j for single engage ment. Fainting spells with ladies neatly executed, and real blood used in every 6cene of tragedies. Ventrilo quism and elocution on demand at lowest rates. Kalsomining, plumbing, carpentry and joinery, paper-hanging, song and dance Gra-co-ltoman wrest ling! tight-wire, cleaning and repair ing clothes; private tutoring for Yale Princeton. Harvard, and University of Michigan. Special attention given to picnicparties and church fairs. Send stamp for circular,, with interesting particulars worth twice the money." "No " "ruilly growled the lawyer. "I d.ni't want anything in your line." "I'lu-m-m. Sorry. Don't you want your otlke scrubbed?" "No." "Coal carried?" "No." "Shoes shiued?" "No." "Spittou -washed out neat?" -N"o, sir. don't want anythingdone at all." "Oh, indeed? Sorry! What will it be worth if 1 tell something you want done- that I can do for you, and no one else?" l told you once I did not want any thing done in your line. But I'll give you a quarter if you can tell me some thing of that sort," and the attorney grinned sarcastically. ."Well, you want me to get out of here! See?" As he pocketed the quarter daintily and softly reopened the door, he said: "Any time you want something else done drop me a card. I'm in this business to make a living, and some thing's got to come." DETERMINED TO WIN. The Woman Pawned Iler Cost to Get Money for Her Lawsuit. "My Jirst .case, said a well-known Harlem lawyer U a Commercial Adver tiser man, "was an unique one. An Irish family of the name of Murphy, living up on the rocks in one of the fast-disappearing remnants of Shanty town, were fraudulently evict n! from their tumbledown cabin by a rascally landlord. The practical head of the household was the wife, and she de termined to tight the matter out. "For three weeks the Murphys, chil dren, furniture and all, lived in the ! back yard of their former home with nothing between them ana heaven but a flimsy tent made of old sheets, while Mrs. Murphy tramped around town looking for a lawyer who would take. their case lor nothing. "One day she charged into my office and told me her story with the stereo typed exactness that comes from fre quent repetition. The case seemed to be a worthy one, and as I wasn't over burdened with work I agreed to take it free of charge and reinstate the .Murphys iu their dilapidated home- Stead. "She wanted to get out a free sum mons against the landlord and waive several other small but necessary ex penses, but I told her it would be more politic to pay these, as the total would not amount to fo. "'Foive dollars,' she cried, 'divil a cint have the Murphys seen since m husband losht his job wan month ago, and the lasht blissed thing thini pawn brokers '11 take they've got already. "When I offered to loan her the money she went into such a rage that I I apologized abjectly. "He the powers, she exclaimed after pacing the floor for about ten minutes, 'I forgot wan thing! Wait, mister, an1 I'll be back in an hour.' "She kept her word,' and jnst as I was closing up shop for the day she reappeared with her hands full of sil ver, which she poured "upon my desk. ' "Mrs." Murphy,' I queried, "where did you get this? I thought your last valuable had been pawned?' "'Yis,' she replied with a gleam of triumph in her gray eyes, Everything excipt the goat. I tuk auld Nanny, whose milk me childer has lived upon, over to the Kenneys, and they lint me four dollars and ninety-sivin cints on her There's the money, young man, and now. be the luv of hivin, go in aud bate McCarty!" "I take pleasure in bating that Mc Carty was baten.'" Arabia and the Horse. 3y n great many people Arabia is suppos-d to le the home of the horse. From ancient Homau. fJrecian. and Jewish history it is readily learned that the horse was unknown in Arabia long after he. was a common factor in the life f southern Kurope. An Aged Calf. A certain clergyman of Halifax, N. S., while addressing his congregation on the subject of the prodigal son, is aid to have affected his hearers even more than he anticipated when, with tears in' his eyes and ' pathos in his voice; he pictured the aged father overjoyed at the return of. his long- lost bov, commanding them to brings forth and kill the little calf which had been fattening for years, and years, and years. Jforptr'a' Bazar. HE.WAS A PLAIN, UNLETTEREO MAN. Bat lie Had fee ana OsmmI Idee Abwa tie Maaaa;eueent of SeTee. Capt. Thomas Byrne, or "UM Tom my,' as he was affectionately called by all his associates, had at one time charge of the HualpaU. a tribe ot In dian nettled in Northwestern Arizona. Old Tommy, perhaps from his "delud herin tongue," had an almost mi raculous ascendency over the chiefs and head men of this tribu, and, though his native eloquence was seconded only by the scantiest allowances of rations from the subsistence stores of the camp, he was loved and trusted by these childlike allies. To hear him coaxing back a sulky warrior to good -humor was somethiug to bu long re membered. "Come, now," he has been heard to say, "ahure, phat is the matter wid ye? Have yes iver axed me for anythin' that Oi didn't promise it to yezV" Yet Tommy's promises were always kept. Suddenly one day the Hualpais, like a flash of lightning out of a clear sky, went on the warpath and fired on the agency buildings before leaving for their old stronghold in the Canon of the Colorado. No one knew the cause of their sudden treachery, and Tommy Byrne was one of those who realized how much it would cost Uncle Sam in blood and treasure if the outbreak were not stopped at once. Without waiting for his spirited little horse to be saddled he threw him self soross its back and swept out into the hills after the fugitives. When the Hualpias saw the cloud of dust co ing they blazed into it. but Tom' was untouched, and dashed gallau up, his horse white with foam, to tio knot of chiefs who stood awaiting him. At first the Indians were sullen, but they soon melted enough to tell the story of their grievances. The new ageut had been robbing them in the most baiefaced 'manner, and in their ignorance they imagined it to he (.'apt. Byrne's-duty to regulate all the a flairs in Lis cam p. They did not want to hurt him and would let him go safcly back, but for them there was nothing but the warpath. "Come back with me," said Tommy gently, "I will see that you are righted." Back they went, following that one unarmed man. Straight to the beef- scales proceeded the otlicer, and in a few minutes he had detected the man ner in which false weight had been secured by tampering witli the poise. A Texas steer, which would not weigli more than 800 pounds, stood at 1,70(, and of course other articles followed in the same ratio. Tommy seized upon the agency and took charge ; the Hualpais were per fectly satisfied, and the agent left that night for California. Thus was a bitter war averted by the prompt action of a plain, unlettered man, who had no ideas about managing savages beyond that of treating them with kindness and justice. Pate Temptation. . One of the members of the New York senate who has passed through a good many experiences during his life time, was in his younger days a track walker on a New England railroad, says the Buffalo Express. At each end of his route was a small station. Tha only persons to watch him were in these neighborhoods. Pat (it is need less to say be was an Irishman) lived in a small house beside the track, about half a mile from one of these stations. He was the fortunate owner of an old horse and wagon. This is what led to his temptation and down fall. There was a good wagon-road running parallel with the track all ths way. "Pat," said the tempter, "what's to hinder you riding between stations?" It wouldn't do," said Pat. But the idea had taken hold of him and one rainy night he tried it. He left his horse half a mile from each end of his beat and walked to the stations at his usual time. Over the rest of the dis tance he rode on the turnpike, trust ing to luck that the track would lie all right. The thing was so easy that it soon became a settled practice with him. For three or four months he guarded the company's property in this way. and no one was the wiser. Then he was spotted, and a summary discharge followed. "A man with your genius for dodging work ought to be a lawyer," said the superintendent. "Faith, I think so myself." answered the tlischargi'd track-walker, and a lawver he became. A deep black stripe across the cor ner of an envelope is a badge of mourn ing, and ealls for the most fashionable and approved sympathy. Philadelplua Record. A Russian's Prophecy of War. A Russian veteran having been asked by an English tourist at War saw if he thought there would be war replied: "My dear sir, do you suppose that Grand Dukes Alexis and Vladimir have gone to France at . this time of famine, when they . can be so little spared, without a purpose? Do you suppose that M. de Giers went there for pleasure? Do you know, sir, that we have our entire available force in the vicinity of the German and Aus trian frontiers? We have 500, OW men, including 92,00) cavalry, posted on our western frontiers. In St. Petersburg we have 50.000 men. in Moscow M.OOO. The Caucasus and central Asia, including Siberia, have only 200,00 men between them. Be sides, we have no recruits on our west ern frontier.only men who have served at least a year with the colors. Do you think that all these precautions have been taken for no purpose what ever? We have a strong fleet in the Black sea, and HXJ.000 men readv for embarkation the- moment a favorable opportunity presents itself; and when. we do declare war do not think we shall make it with rosewater. We have about half a million of Cossacks. These Cossacks" we will let loose upon the Germans. 4 hey will burn and kill everything that comes in their way. The 'laud that they will have passed over will be black and desolate. Not a tree, not a house will be left standing. not a blade of grass: not a child shall survive to tell the tale." CVeUMtM, WOT alrUlWS. v , : Cefia am .Move! Wstetatv Hsarsenvra. .Novel writing has become a trade, and is among the vulgarest and least respectable of modern occupations. A mere business or a mere handicraft, may be ennobled by its pursuer, but can not be vulgarized as the trade pur suit of what was once an art may be. The public insists on being served with imaginative literature of one sort or another. The great mass of read ers has no power to distinguish good work from bad. It hi us no faculty for the recognition of style of jmwer or fineness in the delineation of character. We have seen already what it demands, and we have seen that men whose literary equipment is least adequate iu the night of the judicious can supply the demand as well as the most accom plished literary artist. The novel, as a vehicle for the ex pression of thought ami emotion, i. neither dead nor doomed. The o portunities it affords are so wide and various that great men will always lie found who will employ them. But for the time at least its day of splendor is over. Wo are on the eve of a new epoch. The immediate publicity allorded by the theater and the splendid rewards gathered by the successful playwright will combine to enlist the most capable literary workmen in the dramatic art. We shall have very shortly a renaissance of the stage. This is not to say for a moment that all well-equipped writers of fiction will at once begin to work for the boards. The difference between the two kinds of work is so wide that only the niau why has essayed both can rightly understand it. The result must bo looked for through the action of a growing fashion. Dickens and Thack ery and George Kliot. wrote novels naturally, because the novel was Him form of literature into which they were born. Men and women of equal power win) will dawn upon the world of letters twenty years hence will be writing drama because th literary at mosphere will !, saturated with stage influences. Great fame aud gn-ai pecuniary reward are baits to catch . the biggest kill'! f li-;i'M. The fauns and the reward m:iy be trusted U create and f ishi ni of seeking for tbein, and when tiie master-, .f imaginative art arise tii v will work after the man ner of their In i i -1). f. '.. to Mumtfj in lifi (JuiUrin ,!!), irij A'.tc i:. Ilehcjtding a t'orifeshiiutn. "The struggle which resulted iu.. Pennington's success," said Senator Sherman, "was I think the longest Speakership contest, in our history. It lasted from Dec. .0 till Feb. 1, and the House was iu sin uproar a great part of the time. There were many fnniiw incidents during the contest, and a number of times it looked as though we would have a general light in the House. The Democrats were on one ..:.!.. ,.f !.. II........ .....I ii. , i.i: Li on the other, much as they are now, and 1 remember that we tried to keep the parties separated and the aisle be tween them clear. Potter, a Republican from Wisconsin, and a very large and powerful man, got in a fuss with Barksdale of Mississippi. They sat across the aisle from one another, and Barksdale said something that made Potter very angry. He jumped for him and grabbed him by the hair, in tending to jerk him up from his seat and pound his face, but lo and behold . Barksdale's whole head seemed to rise up in Potter's hands, and the House found out for the first time that Barks dale wore a wig, and his pate, as bald as a billiard ball, shone out under the gaslight, while the House -roared. fV UwlfUihia Inn u irer. Magnetic Stone. In Texas there is a stone about twenty feet in diameter that lias won derful magnetic power. It is said that it will draw a hammer or an ax to its surface even when placed ten or fifteen feet away on the ground. All Questions Cheerfully Answered. Housekeeper: "Have you any Mocha coffee?" Small dealer: "Yes," mum." "Genuine Mocha?" "Just imported, mum." "Import it yourself?" "Oh, yes, mum. I send my orders direct to the sultan, mum." "Humph! How much have you on hand?" "About sixty pounds, mum." "You have, eh? Sixty jounds? I read in the paper this very morning that not over fifty pounds of genuine Mocha reaches this country annually." "Yes, mum, that's true. I had 'bout ten pounds leftover last year." .V. Y. Wntkly. How She Won Her Point. "Mary," he said, as he scowled at her over the breakfast table. "John," she replied fearlessly. "Mary," he said, "what kind of a breakfast do you call this?" "I call it an excellent one," she re turned bravely. "You do!" he exclaimed. "We41, J don't! I think a little variety occasion ally would Ik? a good thing. Do 3011 realize that this is the third morning this week that we have had corned beef hash?" "( 'ertainly. John." "And that we had corned beef for dinner yesterday and cold corned beef for supper?" "Of course. John. . You wanted m to run the house as economically as I could." "Yes. but " , "You said that the amount of meat consumed in this house would bank rupt a bank president." "I know, but I " "And that I ought to plan with more regard for the expense." "Certainly, certainlv.Marv; but hang" H all " "I've be.ii following your instruc tions." "But I don't like corned beef!" "I know it. John." idle said in a busi like way. "That's what makes i la4 so long. It keeps expenses dowis splendidly, and if you want " "I don't!" he exclaimed. "I don't! Let them run up! You've got fote good a business head for anything out side of a lxardiDg house." t'hica Tribune.