4
I'LATTSMOUTIl WEEKLY IIEIIALD, TllUliSDAY, SKIIEMIJEU 1, 1887.
Skkc aiititsmoutii 1'cehhr fjernld.
KNOTTS BROS,
Publishers & Proprietors.
Wonders of Platform Making.
bus Moines Hey Utter, 23: Political
carpenters and joinera are busy theso days
making platforms. A good deal of this
sort of work lias been done in Iowa this
year. Some of the platforms are wonders
to behold, aud cater to every ism and
hobby which has been made known up to
date. All of this kind of platforms are
committed to delegates with speciul and
positive instructions to have them incor
porated in tho stato platform. It will be
queer-looking tiling, we reckon, if they
all get in. The forcing of issues and
minor things into the state platform
reigned in tho republican platform in its
maddest and most ultra form in the days
that Jim "Weaver was ripening up into a
reformer. Every issue known up to that
date, Weaver demanded to have put in
tho platform. lie would beseigo the
committee on resolutions, and shower it
with all sorts of drafts of platforms, and
then fight like a windmill on the lloor of
the convention to get is more isms. 1 Io
was always threatening to leave the party
if it didn't adopt his latest ism, aud fin
ally when ho prayed with tho crusading
women in f ornt of the Bloomficld saloons,
and then demanded of the state convention
that it put that ia tho platform, too, and
it wouldn't do it, he went off and organ
ized a party of his own which would
make a platform with enough isms in it
to suit him.
People like isms, or with one idea, or
with hobbies, always forget the platform
of a political party can be nothing more
than an agreement of a certain lot of
people, going m tho same direction po
litically, on general principles. Enough
peoplo will aggree on main things to
iorm a political party, or to be a majority
in tho state. JIany people who do not
believe in all, but a majority, of the de
clared principles in a platform, will go
in the crowd because it most nearly comes
to their average position. When to ex
pressions on all issues is added
the isms of every individual member of
the party, and the hobby of every neigh
borhood in the state, and the grudge of
this faction and tho hatred of that, and
tho quarrels of disappointed lawyers, or
unhappy editors, and the specifics of every
earnest man for the settlement of every
public question, the prospects of getting
a majarity of tha people in the state to
stand on the platform becomes doubtful
if not hopeless.
It is common to forget that a platform
is but the unsworn agreement ot those
who make it, and that made up in mass
meeting, the hasty work of a few hours
at most, it can not bind and dotermine,
and should not be expected to bind and
determine, absolutely the action of men
who go into office sworn to do their duty
according to their own intelligence and
their own conscience. If a convennion
recommends a wrong thing, and a man
in office or legislature follows the recom
niendation, the same men will meet in
atat convention the next year and de
nounce him for it. A conventian of wise
men always keeps its owo skirts clear,
and as roundly denuonces public servants
for obeying its mistaken erors as for
disobeying others of its mandates. Con
ventions are not an oath, and not ac
countable to the people. Men in office
are. It is well enough for platform
makers to remember this.
A Texas Willie Coat Raises Cain
In a Meeting House.
The Colonel: Down in Gonzales the
other day a Willie goat of good temper
and size and a sweet expressien and big
horns assisted at a protracted meeting.
The goat was a great favorite in the
neighborhood, and liked to toy with
people in that frolicsame fashion so com
mon to goats. His favorite pastime was
feeling for things about the pistol pocket
of the malo inhabitants and sizing up the
overskirts of the ladies. Willie had a
board on him like Aaron's and a pair of
immense horns. It was Sunday, and the
family had gone to churcli. Knowing
the innocent playfulness of the goat, they
hut him up in the kitchen, lest he should
wander into the sanctuary and hurt tho
feeling3 f those with whom he was not
acquainted. Liko most goats with a
christian education and a prying dis
position, William pried open the windows
and escaped.
The minister had just got the christians
Around the altar in piles and heaps, pray
ing that the 6inncr might be converted
during the meeting, when there was a
lull for only one moment, and then the
shouting began. "When the shouts first
broke oat, the visiting minister, who had
preached that day, thought it was the re
sult of his effort, and he shouted, "Bless
God ,breathren! Let it come." And it
did come, but not from where he expect
ed. It took him in the rear, and lifted
him over the altar railing, It was that
goat. He had heard the singing, and
went orer to enjoy himself aad offer his
humble aid in making things lively. lie
succeeded.
As William walked up the aisle he
spied the brother who was leading in
prayer throwing his arms arouud liko
the arms of a star windmill, and he took
it for a challenge. Willie had been
trained up not to take a dare, so he put
his head down and struck tho devout dea
con in the small of the back. The prayer
was cut off right in the middle of the
word 'damnation.' It caused a titter to
raise her head with a frown of horror.
Willie took this as a playful nod, and lie
knocked the sister silly with one butt.
It was at thia point the shouting made the
preacher think he had raised tho spirit,
and when William sent him so ruddy
over the railing lie landed on top of a
fat brother' who yelled like blazes and
used language which never ought to
be used in church. By this time there
was a general stampede. Women began
to scream, old men to yell andjtn rush for
Willie and the latter would meet them
on half-way ground and toy with each
one a moment, and frisk them about and
mix the sisters and breathren up in a stylo
that was scandalous, and jump on the
mourners, and batter the younger sisters,
and lam the life almost out of the officers
who tried to put him out, and carried on
as if he was initiating a whole community
in the sac red rites af Masonry instead of
assisting in a religious meetins. Finally
tho owner of the gay and frolicsome goat
rushed in and called to William to come
to him, and confidence was restored.
J The goat was bought next day by the
"rand ldre ef the Sons of Montezumas.
He is now acting as high grand bouncer
every week.
Sunday Picnics.
The sentiment is growing stronger dai
ly in all communities against Sunday pic
nics, with their usual concomitant liquor
drinking. Anyone wlit will observe the
effects of these Sunday carousals will be
led to the direct conclusion that they are
fearfully demoralizing to the community,
these picnics are usuall gotten up by men
for the purpose of making money by the
sale of beer, wines, etc. They call togeth
er a promiscuous assemblage f people,
and are too frequently the resorts of the
most desperate and dis-reputable men,
who hare no regard for woman's virtue,
or morality in general.
While many attend who are reputable
citizens, it is almoet impossible to exclude
those who attend from motives wholly
base and dangerous. The worst feature
of these gathering where beer is sold, is,
that the law is openly and boldly defied !
in the very face of law abiding citizens.
This can have no other effect than to los
tcr a disregard for law and a dipositoin
to disobey whatever legal restrictions are
not in accord with the opinions of certain
people. The time has come to'put a stop
to these Sunday revelries. The terrible
tragedy that occured at Friend last. Sun
day stands forth as a ghastly proof of
the evil tendencies of these gatherings.
Crete Globe.
Cneeral Logan's Creat Work.
A beautifully bound and artistically
illustrated volume, bearing the title "The
Volunteer Soldier of America" comes to
us from the publshing house of It. S.
Peale & Co., Chicago, The public has
been anxiously awaiting this work from
the brain and hand of the brave soldier
who is sleeping in mortality, but awake
in immortality GeneralJohn A. Logan.
Its authorship alone would invest it with
an undying interest, but, aside from this
his fitness for treating the subject gives
the volume a practical value hardly to
be estimated. He was an experienced
military man who had carefully and in
telligently studied ihe military system of
the country; and when, in convincing
language, and by indisputible facts, he
demonstraits the need of reform, the
country will do well to heed his words.
General Logan speaks emphatically, but
without prejudice or bitterness, and no
one can read this, his greatest work, with
out feeling that it has been written from
first to last as a duty to a nation which
had crowned him as one of its greatest
soldiers ond statesmen.
"The Volunteer Soldier" is not a "war
book" in the common meaning of the
term; neither is it a lfie of Logan
although the biograpwical memoir of the
author, which preceeds the body of the
book, is, without doubt, the best short
biography of the illustrious volunteer
leader that lias ever been written, con
taining many facts and incidents in his
career never before published: and the
General's Military Reminiscences, it mutt
be admitted by all, form a most valuable
contribution to the history of the civil
strife.
It is the only connected history of the
volunteer service of America that has
ever been written; the first and only great
attempt to perpetuate the glorious achiev
ments of the American citizen soldiery,
and to give to the volunteer soldier and
sailor that honor and place in history
which are bo justly their due. Logan
was never more eloquent than when re
citing the deeds or advocating the rights
of his comrades in arms. In this work
he demands justice for the defenders of
the American republic, and shows that
the safety and permanence of our free in
stitutions depend upon the strong arms
and loyal hearts of her citizen soldiers.
The handsomely printed pages of the
book abound in thrilling descriptions of
the hcroium of individuals, companies,
regiments, divisions and corps. Much of
it reads like romance.
The work 'is copyrighted by Mrs. Lo
gan. who receives two-thirds of the gross
profits. The firt edition, tho publishers
state, has already been exhausted, but
others aro under way.
"The Volunteer Soldier" is a large oc
trvo volume of over seven hundred pages
including General Logan's military remi
niecenses from his private journal, now
published for the first time. Tho book
is beautifully bound, and the artistic en
yravings and clear letter-press make it
the handsomest publication which has
reached the book tabic for some time.
Sherman's Tribute to Cen. Ceo. H.
Thomas.
Porhaps the passage of Sherman's re
ply to Gen Iiosser which will attract the
most attention in the locality is the fol
lowing tribute to the locality and mili
tary genius of Gen. George II. Thomas.
I offer another name more nearly resem
bling Gen. Lee in peresonal characteris
tics, Gen. H. Thomas, probably less known
in England, but who has a larger follow
ing and holds a higher place in the hearts
and affections of the American people
than Gen. Lee. He, too, was a Virginian,
and when Lee resigned from the army in
1861 Thomas succeeded him as colonel of
the second regular cavalry. A graduate
of West Point of the class of 1840, he
seryed his country in the Florida war, in
the Mexican war, and in campaigns
againist hostile Indians, rising with hom
er and credit against all the grades, at
each stage taking the usual oath to de
fend the United States against all her en
emies whatsoever, foreign and domestic.
When the storm f civil war burst on
our coutnry, unlike Lee he resolved to
stand by his oath and to fight against his
native state, to maintain the common
union of our fathers. In personal ap
pearance he resembled George Washing
ton, the father of his country, and in all
the attributes of maahood he was the peer
of Gen. Lee, as good if not a better soldier,
of equal intelligence, the same kind heart,
beloved to idoylatry by his army of the
Cumberland, and exercising a gentle but
strict discipline, never disturbed by false
rumors or real danger: not naturally ag
gressive, but magnificent on the defen
sive: almost the very counterpart of his
friend, Gen. Lee, but far excelling him
in the moral and patriotic line of action
at the begining of the war. Lee resigned
his commission when the civil war was
certain, but Thomas remained true to his
oath and his duty always, to the very last
moment of his life. During the whole
war his services were transcendent, win
ning the first substantial victory at Mills
Springs, in Kentucky, January 20, 18G2
participating in all the campaigns of the
west in 1862-3-4, and finally, December
16, 1864, annihilating the army of Hood,
which in mid-winter had advanced to
Nashville to besiege him. In none of
these battles will Gen. Wolseley pretend
there was such inequality of numbers as
he refers to in the east.
Washington's Fairest Maids in the
Role of Newspaper Cor
rerpendents. The star of tho newspaper writer is in
the ascendant, declares a Washington
correspondent. The newspaper rash has
broken out violently in Washington, and
the fad of the society girl is to write for
the newspapers. Even Mrs. Logan has
not escaped it, and not long ago a two
column article by her appeared in the
Post. But the way the dear girls are go
ing for journalistic honors is refreshing.
One delightful little thing, whose father
is a military officer of high rank, and
who goes everywhere, carries a dainty lit
tle, tablet around with herjto dinners and
balls, wherein she puts down the names
and clothes of the guests. This young
thing and a highly-respected society cor
respondent, who is the right hand woman
of the men correspondents for weddings
and other society incidents, and who goes
by the affectionate name of Long Tom ,
hunt ia couples. Between them they get
up the best society news in Washington.
Naturally, all the girls in the delightful
little things, set aspire to do likewise,
partly impelled by the wonderful tales
they hear of the money newspaper writers
command. It is told, and moreover, it
is believed, that a certain Bociety writer
here gets $200 a month for four short
letters. Another woman, who tackles
public affairs chicly and does a little
side work for the magazines, ia credited
with making, not two, three or four
thousand dallars a year, but ten thous
and! The girls think that the editor, sit
ting in a boudoir hung with pale, pink
satin, receives the postulaDt, glances at
her dainty manuscript, and, touching a
silver bell, an office boy is velvet knee
breeches escorts her down to the publish
er's office. There, in the dim light of
stained glass and wax candles, the pub
lisher sits and writes and writes checks
all day long. He hands the postulant a
bank check to be filled in at her own
sweet caprice. She can command this
check anv time she chooses by simply
rubbing the lamp no, exercising the pen.
What they do believe is only a little less
improbable than this. Anyhow, they are
all at it, and those who are lucky enough
,to get in print are perfectly delighted.
Stop.
Schuyler Sun.
There are a few young men in Schuy
ler to whom it might bo well to suy halt
You may mean well enough but your
actions do not speak well. Most of you
have loving mothers, histcrs and fathers
who are t-nxious to see you succeed well
in the world. Hanging around the street
after nightfall, associating with a class
of loafers will never fullil their v. ishes.
Going into the saloon to take a drink oc
casionally because another fool boy friend
invites you and it looks big you only
imagine so, for it don't stalk up to the
counter and take a friendly glass with
him. It would be well for koiik; of you
to remember that the most of our hiiliits
are formed while young and those you
are now contracting, in two years, aye, in
six months, some of you will neyir be
able to break. These words are not di
rected to the old time loafer aud saloon
bum, but to a certain intelligent few
yonng men personally acquainted with
us. We are confident that you mean to
"swear off" at no distant day, but remem
ber that will be hard to do. Now is the
time. Leave the streets at night and re
gale .vourselves at the fire-side of home
in company witli brothers ami sisters or
with a "ood book. Younr friend, if
this hits you and is the means of better
resolutions being formed, you will thank
Goel in five years that it was so.
A Novel Bet.
While I am not a betting man. said F.
J. Cheney, of the firm of F. J. Cheney &,
Co., I considered it my religious duty to
make that fellow a bet, you see he was
about dead' and I guess he would of
died before Spring, if I had not of got
him on a bet. You know some men liael
rather loose their life than lofe a liun-
dreel, well he was on-; of that kind, and
we both came near being out, but I saved
my hundred and it only cost him ton
dollars. How's thut J He sent for in
one day and said the doctors had all giv
en him up to die, with the catarrh. I
told him that I would bet him $100 that
HaliVCatarrh Cure woulel cure him or I
would give him $ 100 if it failcil. He
took the latter proposition. This was
three months ago; you see how he looks
now, don't you, as well as any one, and
a dandy. American, Toledo, O.
21ml
Henry Ive3 anel Ferdinand YTard
both smoke cigarettes, The moral is ob
vious. Smoke a pipe. Lincoln Jour
nal.
Sailor hats are all the rage in Lon-
don, as they are with us. They look fun
ny when surmounted with veils. Sail; is
prefer tarpaulin.
Life is burdensome, alike to the suffer
er and all around him, while dyspepsia
and its attending evils hold sway. Com
plaints of this nature can be speedily
cured by taking Prickly Ash Bitters reg
ularly. Thousands once thus affiicted
now bear cheerful testimony as to its
merits. 24 m 1
The Queen of the Netherlanels is to
act as regent for her daughter in the
event of a demise of the crown. The
queen is not a favorite in Holland.
Bucklen's Arnica Salve
The Best Salve in the world for Cuts,
Bruises, Sores, ulcers, Salt Rheum, Fever
Sores, Tetter, Chapped Hands, Chilblains,
Corns, and all Skin Eruptions, anel posi
tively cures Piles, or no pay required.
It is guaranteeel to give perfect satisfac
tion, or money refunded. Price, 25 cents
per box. For sale by
301 y F. G. FnrcKE & Co.
Miss Inez Shipman, the new professor
at Lombard University, takes equal hon
ors with the other professors, and wears
her mantle with dignity.
CECnOSENT
ULLUG
FREE.
Warranted. Krtnli.Ktlialilf
tested Ked chao. Illus
trated e atniotrue Sent free.
Prices Inwnt. Packet! S aM.
Gardeners nay our seeds re
the best. ThounandK of choice
pacKets given away.
Special wholesale prtne
lint to .Varlct n r.mtr.
ALNEER BROS.,,
Rockford, flU
The best and Barest Eemedy for Caro of
all diseases caused by any derangement ol
the Liver, Kidneys, Stomach and Bowels.
Dyspepsia, Sick Headache, Constipation,
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yield readily to the beneficent infiaence of
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It ia pleasant to the taste, tones up the
system, restores and preserves health. 9
It Is purely Vegetable, and annot fail to
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As a Blood Purifier it is superior to ail
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W A k V JK
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Jonathan Hatt
TYflEATIlMIICET.
PORK PACKERS and i.kalkks ix JILTTKll AND EGGS.
BEEF, P011K, MUTTON AND VEAL.
THE LEST THE MATIKET AFFORDS ALWAYS ON HAND.
Sugar Cured Meals, Hams, Bacon, Lard, &c, &c
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RICHEY BROS.,
Corner IVarl and Seventh Streets.
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