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About Capital city courier. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1885-1893 | View Entire Issue (March 26, 1892)
CAPITAL CITY COURIER, SATURDAY, MARCH 26, 1892 AT THE TABERNACLE. THE DIVINE ASTRONOMY A8 DE SCRIBED BY THE PROPHET8. In the Unchanging Volume of the Hkles It li Written That Ootl I a CJml of InDnlte Order anil Without Variable net or Shadow of Turning. UltouKLVN, Mnrch sa In this scrmou Dr. Tulmago traverses wild realm of thought to teach useful everyday lessons, based ou the text, Amos v, 8, "Seek hlin that mnkcth the Seven Stars and Orion." A country farmer wroto this text Amos -of Tokon. -He plowed the earth and thrashed the grain by a now thrashing machine just Invented, as formerly tho cat tle trod out the grain. Ho gathered tho fruit of tho sycamoro tree and scarified It with an Iron comb just before It was gut ting ripe, at It was necessary and custom ary In that way to take from it the bitter ness. Ho was tho sou of a poor shepherd and stuttered, but lieforo tho stnmmcrlug rustic tho Philistines and Syrians and Phoenicians 'nnd Monbltesand Ammonites and Edomltcs and Israelites trembled. Moses was a lawgiver, Daniel was a rjrlnco. Isaiah n courtier and David a klntr: but Amos, tho author of my text, was a peasant, and, as might bo supposed, nearly all his parallelisms are pastoral, his proph ecy full of the odor of new mown hay, and the rattle of locusts, and tho rumble of carts with sheaves, and tho roar of wild beasts devouring tho Hock while tho shepherd -camo out In their defense. He watched the herds by day, and by night Inhabited a booth made out of bushes, so that through these he could see the stars all night long, and was more familiar with them than wo who have tight roofs to our houses and hardly -ever see the stars, except among tho tall brick chimneys of the great towns. Hut at seasons of the year when the herds were in special danger, he would stay out In tho open field all through tho darkness, his only shelter the curtain of tho night heaven, with tho stellar embroideries and silvered tassels of lunar light. What a llfo of solitude, all alono with his herds) Poor Amost And nt 12 o'clock at night hark to tho wolf's bark, and the lions roar, and tho beur's growl, and the owl's U-whlt-to-who, and tho serpent's 1 ss, as be unwittingly steps too near while moving through the thickets! So Amos, like other herdsmen, got tho habit of stud) ing tho map of the heavens, be cause it was so much of tho time spread out before him. Ho noticed soino stars advancing and others receding. Ho asso ciated their dawn and setting with certain seasons of tho year. Ho had a poetic nature, and he read night by night, and mouth by month, and year by year, tho poem of the constellations, divinely rhythmic. Hut two rosettes of stars especially attracted his attention while seated on tho ground or lying on his back under tho open scroll of tho midnight heavens tho Pleiades, or Seven Stars, ami Orion. Tho former group this rustic prophet associated with the spring, as it rises about tho first of May. Tho latter ho associated with tho winter, as it conies to the, meridian in January. The Pleiades, or Seven Stars, connected with all sweetness and joy; Orion, the herald of the tempest. The ancients wore tho more apt to study the physiognomy and Juxtaposition of the heavenly bodies. because they thought they had a special! Influence upon the earth, and perhaps they were right. If the moon every few hours lifts and lets down tho tides of tho Atlantic ocean, and tho electric storms of the sun, by nil scientific admission, affect the earth, why not the stars have proportionate effect? WAS IT ALL BUTKnSTITlOXf And there are somo things which wake me think that it may not have been all su perstition which connected tho movements and appearance of the heavenly bodies with great moral events on earth. Did not a meteor run on evangelistic errand on the first Christmas night and designate the rough cradle of our 1-ordf Did not the stars in their courses fight against Slseraf Was it merely coincidental that before the destruction of Jerusalem tho moon was eclipsed for twelve consecutive nights? Did It merely happen so that a new star appeared in constellation Cassiopeia, and then disappeared just lefore King Charles IX of Franco, who was responsible for thy St. Bartholomew massacre, died? Was it without significance that in the days of the Roman emperor Justli ian war and (amine were preceded by the dimness of the sun, which for nearly a year gave no more light than the moon, although there were no clouds to obscure it? Astrology, after all, may have been something more than a brilliant heathen ism. No wonder that Amos of tho text, having heard these two anthems of the stars, put down the stout rough staff of the herdsman and took Into his brown hand and cut and knotted fingers tho pen of a prophet and advised tho recreant peo ple of his time to return to God, saying, "Seek him that maketh the Seven Stars and Orion." This command, which Amos gave 785 years H. C, is just as appropriate for us. 1892 A. D. In the first place, Amos saw, as wo must see, that the God who made the Pleiudes and Orion must bo the God of order. It was not so much n star here and a star there that Impressed the inspired herds man, but seven in one group and seven in the other group. Ho saw that night after night and season after season and decade after decado they hod kept step of light, each one In Its own place, a sisterhood never clashing and never contesting prec edence. From the time Heslod called tho Pleiades the "seven daughtes of Atlas," and Virgil wrote in his JKncid of "Stormy Orion" until now, they have observed the order established for their coining and going; order written not in manuscript that may be pigeonholed, but with tho hand of the Almighty on the dome of the sky. so that all nations may read it. Order. Persistent order. Sublime order. Om nipotent order. TIIK CONSOLATION IN NATUItE. What a sedative to you and me, to whom communities and nations sometimes seem going pellmell, and world ruled by some fiend at haphazard and In all directions maladministration! The God who keeps, even worlds in right circuit for six thous and years can certainly keep all the affairs of individuals and nations and continents in adjustment. We had not better fret much, for the peasant's argument of the text was right. If God can lake care of the seven worlds of the Pleiades and the four chief worlds or Orion, he can probably take caro of the one world wo Inhabit. So 1 feel very much as my father felt one day when we were going to the country mill to get n grist ground, and I, a boy of seven years, sat In the back part of the wagon, and our yoke of oxen ran away with us and along a labyrinthine road through the woods, so that I thought every moment we should be flushed to pieces, linil I made a terrible outcry of fright, aud my father turned to me with a fare perfectly calm, and saldi "Do Will what are you crying alwutf 1 guess wi can ride as fast as the oxen ran run.' And, my hearers, why should lie affrighted and lose ourequlllbrlum In tho swift move ment of worldly events, especially when we are assured that It Is not a yoke of uu broken steers that are drawing us ou, but that order and wlso government are In tin' yoku? In your occupation, your mission, yotii sphere, do the best you can, and then trust to Clod; and If things are all mixed nil'.' disquieting, and your brain Is hot and your heart sick, get some one to go out with you Into tho starlight and point out to you the Pleiades, or, better than that, get Into some observatory, and through tho telescope s further than Amos with tho naked eye could namely, two hundred stars In the Pleiades, and that In what Is called the sword of Orion there is a nebula computet to 1hi two trillion two hundred thousand billions times larger than tho sun. Oh, lie at peace with the Ootl who niadu all t lint and controls all that tho wheel of tho con stellatlons turning In the wheel of galaxies for thousands of years without the break ing of a cog or tho slipping of a band or the snap of an axle. For your placidity and comfort through tho Iinl Jesus Christ. I charge you, "Seek him that niaketh the Seven Stars and OrloiijL. TIIK LIMIT or oot. Again, Amos saw, as we must see, that the (lod who made these two groups of the text was tho God of light. Amos saw that God was not satisfied with making one star, or two stars or three stars, but he makes seven; and having finished that group of worlds, makes another group group after group. To the Pleiades ho adds Orion. It seems that God likes light so well that he keeps making It. Only one being In tho universe knows tho statistics of solar, lunar, stellar, meteoric creations, and that is tho Creator himself. And they have all been lovingly christened, each ouo a name as distinct as the names of your children. "He telleth tho number of the stars; ho calleth them all by their names." The seven Pleiades had names given to them, and they arc Alcyone, Mcropu, Celieno, Elcctra, Sterope, Taygcto and Mala. Hut think of tho billions and trillions ot daughters of starry light that God calls by name as they sweep by him witli beaming brow and lustrous robot So fond Is God of light natural light, moral light, spiritual light. Again and again is light harnessed for symbollzatlon Christ, tho bright morning star; evangelization, tho day break; tho redemption of nations. Sun of Righteousness rising with healing In hla wings. O men and women, with so many sorrows and sins and perplexities, if yon want light of comfort, light of pardon, light of goodness, In earnest prajcr through Christ, "Seek him that maketh the Seven Stars and Orion." Again, Amos saw, as wo must see, that the God who made these two archipelagoes of stars must bu an unchanging God. There had been no change in tho stellar appearance in this herdsman's lifetime, ami his father, a shepherd, reported to him that there had been no change in his life time. And these two clusters hang over tho celestial arbor now just as they were tho first night that they shone on the Kdenlc bowers; tho samo as when the Egyptians built the pyramids, from the top of which to watch them; tho same as when the Chaldeans calculated the eclipses; mo samo as wnen hllliu, according to the book of Job, went out to study tho aurora uoreans; mo samo unuer I'toicmnic system and Copcrnicun system; the same from Cnlistheues to Pythagoras, aud from Pythagoras to Herschel. Surely, a change less God must have fashioned the Pleiades and Orion! Oh, what an anodyne amid the tips and downs of life, aud the flux anil reflux of the tides of prosperity, to know that we have a changeless God, tho same "yesterday, today and forever!" fickli:ni:ss ok kaiitiilv moxaiiciis. Xerxes garlanded and knighted the steersman of his boat in the morning and hanged hint In the evening of the samo day. The world sits in its chariot and drives tandem, and the horse ahead is Hu..a and the horse behind is Anathema. Lord Cobhuin, in King .lames' time, was nppluudcd, and hod thirty-five thousand dollars a year, but was afterward execrated and lived ou scraps stolen from the royal kitchen. Alexander the Creat after death remained unburied for thirty days, because no one would do tho honor of shoveling him under. The Duke of Wellington re fused to huve his iron fence mended because It had been broken by an infuriated pop ulace in some hour of political excitement, and he left it iu ruins that men might learn what a fickle thing is human favor. "Hut the mercy of the Iord Is from ever lasting to everlasting to them that fear him, and ills righteousness unto tho chil dren's children of such as keep his cove uant, and to those who remember his com mandments to do them." This moment "Seek him that maketh the Soveu Stars and Orion." Again, Amos saw, as wo must see, that the God who mado these two beacons of the oriental night sky must be a God of love and kindly warning. Tho Pleiades rising In mldsky said to all the herdsmen and shepherds and husbandmen, "Come out and enjoy the mild weather aud culti vate your gardens nnd fields." Orion, com ing In winter, warned them to prepare for tempest. All navigation was regulated by these two constellations. The one said to shipmaster aud crew, "Hoist sail for the sen and gather merchandise from other lauds." Hut Orion was the storm signal, aud said, "Reef sail, make things snug or put into harbor, for the hurricanes are getting their wings out." As tho Pleiades were the sweet evangels of the spring, Orion was the warning prophet of the winter. LESSONS OK TIIK 8KABON8. Oh, now I get tho best view of God I ever had! There are two kinds of sermons I never want to preucii the one that pre sents God so kind, so Indulgent, so lenient, so Imbecile that men may do what they will against him and fracture his every law and put the pry of their impertinence and rebellion under his throne, and while they are spitting in his face and stubbing at Ids heart, lie takes them up in his arms and kisses their infuriated brow and cheek, saying, "Of such is the kingdom of heaven." The other kind of sermon I never want to 1 . 4i 4 . ) n preach Is tho one that represents God as al lire and torture mid thu idercloiid, and with red hot pitchfork tossing the human race Into paroxysms or lullnlte agony. The sermon that I am now-prcachlng believes In n God of loving, kindly warning, the God of spring and winter, the God of tho Plei ades and Orion. You must remember that the winter is just as important as the spring. Let one winter pass without frost to kill vegetn tlou and Ice to bind the rivers aud snow to enrich our fields and then you will have to enlarge your hospitals and your cemeteries. "A green Christmas makes a fat grave yard" was the old proverb. Storms to purify the air. Thermometer at ten do1 grees above r.ero to tone up tho system. December and January just as Important as May and dune. I toll you we need the storms of llfo as much as we do tho sun shine. There ate mora men ruined by prosperity than by adversity. If wo had our own way in life, before this wo would have Iteeti Impersonal Ions ot selfishness and worldlluess and disgusting sin, and puffed up until wo would have Wen like Julius Ciesnr, who was mado by syco phants to lelloo that he was divine, aud tho freckles on his face were as stars of the firmament. One of tho swiftest transatlantic voyages mado last summer by our swiftest steamer was because she had a stormy wind ntmft, chasing her from New York to Liverpool. Hut to those going In tho opposite direc tion the storm was a buffeting and a hin drance. It Is a bad thing to have a storm ahead, pushing us back; but If wo bo God's children and aiming toward heaven the storms of life Mill only chase us tho sooner Into tho harbor. I am so glad to Mlee that the monsoons nnd typhoons nnd mis trals and siroccos of tho land nnd sea are not unchained maniacs let hxiso upon the earth, hut are under divine supervision! I am so glad that the God of the Seven Bturs is also tho God of Orlolil It was out of Dante's suffering came the sublime "1)1 vlna CommtO'u," and out of John Milton's blindness came "Paradise Lost," and out of miserable Inlldel attack came the "Hrldgewater Treatise" In favor of Chris tianity, aud out of David's exile camo the songs of consolation, ami out or tho sillier Ingsof Clirlst come the possibility of the world's redemption, and out of your be reavement, your persecution, your pover ties, your misfortunes may yet come an eternal heaven. Tilt: ItOLLIKU WOIII.DS ON IllOlt. Oh, what a mercy It Is that In tho text nnd all up and down the Hihlo God Induces us to look out toward other worlds! Hihlo astronomy in Genesis, In Joshua, In Job, In the Psalms, In tho prophets, major and minor, In St, John's Apocalypse, practical ly saying; "Worlds! worlds! worldsl Get ready for theml" We have n nicii little world here that wo stick to, as though los ing that we lose all. We are afraid of fall ing off this little raft of a world. Wo are afraid that some meteoric Iconoclast will some night smash It, aud wo want every thing to revolvo around It, and aro disap pointed when we find that It revolves around the sun Instead of the sun revolv ing around it. Wliataftisswemakoaliout this little bit of a world, Its existence only a short time between two spasms, tho par oxysm by which it was hurled from chaos Into order, aud the paroxysm of Its demo litiou. And 1 am glad that so many texts call us to look off to other worlds, many of them larger and grander and more re splendent. "Iok there," sas Job, "at Ma.aroth aud Arcturus and his sons!" "Look there," says St. John, "at the moon under Christ's feetl" "Look there," says Joshua, "at the sun standing still iiIkjvo Gibcon!" "Ijook there," says Moses, "at tho sparkling firmament!" "Look there," says Amos, tlio herdsman, "at the Seven Stars and Orion!" Don't let us bu so sad about thoso who shove off from this world under Christly pilotage. Don't let us be so agitated about our own going off this little barge or sloop or canal boat of i world to get ou some Great Kastcrn of the heavens. Don't let us persist in want ing to stay hi this barn, tills shed, this out house of a world when all the king's palaces already occupied by many of our best friends are swinging wide oieu their gat js to let us iu. When I read, "Iu my Father's house are many mansions," I do not know but that each world is a room, aud as many rooms as there arc worlds, stellar stairs, stellar galleries, stellar hallways, stellar wlndowt;, stellar domes. How our departed friends must pity us shut up in these cramped apartments, tired if we walk fifteen milcr, when they some morning, by one stroke of wing, can make circuitof the whole stell ir system ami he hack iu time for matiiu.' Perhaps yonder twinkling constellation Is the residence of the martyrs; that group of twelve luminaries is tlie celestial home of the apostles. Perhaps that steep of light Is the dwelling place of angels cheru hie, seraphic, ntchaugelle. A mansion with as many room as worlds, and all their windows Illuminated for festivity. TIIK HTI.MUI.U8 TO CIIIIISTIAN TIIOUQIIT. Oh, how tills widens aud lifts and stim ulates our expectations! How little it makes the present and how stupendous it makes the future! How It consoles us about our pious dead, who, Instead of be ing boxed up and under the ground, have the range of as many rooms as there are worlds, and welcome everywhere, for It Is tho Father's house, In which there ure many mansions! Oh, Lord God of the Soveu Stars and Orion, how can I endure the transport, the ecstasy of such a vision! I must obey my text ilud seek-him. I will seek him. I seek him now, for I call to mind that It is not the material universe that is most valuable, but the spiritual, and that each of us lias a soul worth more than all the worlds which the Inspired herdsman saw from his liooth ou the kills of Tekoa. I had studied It before, but the Cathe dral of Cologne, Germany, never im pressed me as it did the last time I saw It. It is admittedly the grandest gothic struc ture In the world, Its foundation laid iu 1248, only eight or nine years ago com pleted. More than six hundred years iu li iiillding. All Kurope tnxed for Its con struetion. Its chapel of tho Mugl with precious stones enough to purchase a king dom. Its chapel of St. Agues with master pieces of painting. Its spire springing five hundred and eleven feet Into tho heavens. Its stained glass tho chorus of nil rich colors. Statues encircling tho pillars nnd encircling all. Statues above statues, until sculpture cun do no more, but faints and fulls back against carved stalls and down on pavements over which tho kings and queens of the earth have walked to con fession. Nnvo and aisles and transept nnd portals combining the splendors of sunrise. Interlaced, Interfollated, iutercolumiied grandeur. As I stood outside looking nt thu douhlo range uf flying buttresses ami the forest of pinnacles, hlglier and higher and higher, imtll I almost reeled from diz ziness, I exclaimed: "Great doxology In stone! Frozen prayer of many nations!" Hut while standing there I saw a poor iipin enter and put down his pack and kneel beside his burden on thu hard floor of that cathedral, And tears of deep tiiiuiiuii iiiiuu ituw nn v) ui lit 1 nuu iu iu I Rl,f. T ,s , w' u , U. Iimlt.rlu, hurron,uKs. That man will live after the last pinnacle has fallen, and not one stone of all that cathedral glory shall remain tincrumbled. Ho Is now n Lazarus in rags and poverty and weari ness, but Immortal nnd n sou of the Lord God Almighty, aud tho prayer he now offers, though amid many superstitions, I belieVL God will hear, and among the apostles whose sculptured forms stand In the surrounding niches ho will at hist lie lifted, ami into the presence of that Christ whose suiTerlligs aru represented by the crucifix la-fore which he bows, nnd be raised In duu tlmo out of nil his povcrtlcu Into the glorious home built for him and built for us by 'him who maketh the Beveu Stars aud Orion.' " HIS FIRST SMOKE. )eorgl I IVisuadrd In Try a rip it aa4 Wishes llo Wa lleatl After II. deer edltur htlst ulte I was most ded. I Jest prald that I wood die, hut gawd :lhlent auslr ml iiralr nil 2 da I felo Uiter, no I am glad that gawd dldent anslr mi pralr. I jest wish tho that ml urn & pnwood ba lltel luolr kinder 2 me. thay seed how sick I wo an thay dldent felo a bit sorrl 4 mo an sed It served mo rltocauso 1 wos sik. this Is how It ill happlllld. I met bll an he sed gorgle, r u with lue. ov eoss bll node t was with him cause I was stntidln by him, hut that Is null slang, an wen cut 1 says r u with mo thay mena wll u go In a seeine, so wen bll sed r u with me 1 sed yes. then I sed wal Is It. this, he sed, an he tuk a plpo out of his pocket an n (taper of tohacker. wal do ll inelie, I askld. wy, wat the matter with havln a smoke, ho sed. so I sed I am with u. then we went 2 r barn an bll filled his plpo an then glvu mo 1 2 smoke, bll has sinokld 4 a long time. I never smokld In ml life. ho, bll, I sed, alut It rung for mo 2 smoke wen he handed me the pipeful of tohacker, now, sed bll, dont bo n fttle gorgle. yura pa is a sundl seool techer nn he smokes, no how can It h rung. sol put the pipu Iu ml mouth an till striked a match and 1 commenced 2 pull on the pipe, the smoko tasted orful nasty an It choked me. how dtt li like It, gorgle, bll sed. ho, It Is Hue, I sell, cause If I sed I dldent like It bll wood luff an say I was a reglar buhl. so I went on sinokln an smokln nn hi & bll commencld to fele like I wood like 2 thro away thu plpe.onll I wasafrade ov bll lalllii nt me. then hi & hi I sed 2 bll I woodcut smoko mil more cans I dldent want to Impose ou his good natur hi takln his tohacker, hut bll sed not 2 mentln it, cause It dldent cost him mil thing cause he swiped It frum his pa. ho, foolish boy wat I was, I tuk sum uiolr tohacker an smoked sum tuolr, bl an hi 1 saw the wals of tho barn comeuce 2 move a round an I felt like ml bed wood bust, sc I lade down the pipe an tole bll I woodcut smoke an I molr 4 sure, cause I node 1 was robin him ov his tohacker. bll trldo 2 git mo to smoko sum molr but I rely coodetit. way down In ml stomlk It felt like n lot of peopul wos fltlu, nn then I got so slk I had 2 lay down. I kep gctln worse nu worse an I thoto 1 wos dyln. bll jouMin, I sed, I alut gone 2 live much longer, but wen u take ml (led body home dont tel ml ma ami pa a bote me smokln. but bll onl I luffed an sed I wood b al rite In a lltel wile, an that If 1 thot I wos dyln 1 liettcr bo tuk home, so bll helped me get ou ml fete an I got home. heavlngs, gorgle, said ma wen 1 got In the house, wat malks u so pale wats tho matlr with u child. t tried to make b love thay wosentnothin tho matlr, but ma sed thay wos an sent 4 a doctor. wen ho cum ho tolo inn 1 had botn smokln. then ma crido an sed 1 wos a lost child an that she dldent think I cood b so wicked as 2 hiunke an that tho lest thing she cood du wood bo 2 send mo 2 a peuuytentary. I woodcut care If they sent me 2 a butcher shop 2 b cut up 4 sasslge mete.. I jest wlshld I wood die. ho, 1 wos orful slk. then wen pa cum homo he hiked nt mo, an he askld wat wos the matlr, nnd ma sed 1 had a lied ake, cause she dldent want him 2 no I had ls?ni smokln. but pa wos ded on. ho Jest coined over 2 mo nu sed, wel, u wantld 2 bo a man dldent li. it smoked, illdut u. how did it like It. I oull groucd. then pa got his plpo nn (lid It with missus millers best an maid me smoke It, saylu, men don't stop nt 1 pipe fill ov tohacker. u must halv n gild smoke, if u evlr waul a smoko agaiie tel me so, au u kin halv my pipe. If I had been a big man nu wosent so slk I wood halv licked pa. I trido 2 ask him 4 merci, but I coodent spoke. I jist closid ml eyes au prald 4 gawd 2 inalk mo a gud boy au let me die. then I went 2 sleap an next day I wos beter. ,1 promlcid ma I wood nevlr smoke nganc. lltel bov, nevlr smoke, that Is ml advise. If u must smoke halv a pistol with u, an then wen u get sick u kin kil yourself, you res, gorgle. New York Mercury. With Oood Itenson. It Is said that nothing stamps tho edu cated man like thecorrect use of adjectives and adverbs. Andy Trumbull was a popu lar merchant iu a small way, but In nu evil hour he committed a forgery, which was discovered. He was tried at tho next term of court, and Kphrnlm Hlulr was among thoso who went over to the county seat to hear tho trial. "Well?" said tho wlfo on his return. "Guilty," said Kphralm laconically. "Five years." "Land suzl" cried Mrs. Blair. "How did poor Andy take It?" "Well," said Kphralm reflectively, "I looking right at Andy when he was sen tenced, nnd it struck me that ho was em barrassed." Youth's Companion. A Hiiro Hlgn. Dr. Dumps (n phrenologist) This boy, ma'am will never dio iu state's prison. Mrs. Gimlet I'm sure we oug'it to be thankful for that. Dr. Humps Yes, tho bump of longevity Is highly developed; he will live to serve out his time. Truth. Kuougli, Hostess Shall I have you helped to koiuo of the lemonade, Major Claptrap? Major Claptrap Thank you, madam, no. You have probably heard the old saying, "You may take an ass to water, but you can't make him drink." Hostess Then I more. Tclegrufs. won't press you an THE RED, RED WEST, I've traveled In heaps of cmintrliM ami studied all kinds of art, Till tlioro Isn't a critic or ennuolssuiir who's properly deemed so smart. And I'm free to say llmt Hie grand results of my explorations show That somehow paint gels roddor tho farther nut west I unt I've slpissl the voluptuous sherbet that the nrlciil ivls semi, And I'xefclt the glow of red llordentii tingling riieh separate nerve) I've sampled j our ohissla Mnsslo under an nrlior uieeii, Ami I've reeked with song a wholo night long osera brown poteen. The stalwart brow of Hut lsnd o' cakes, the schnapps of the frilitnl Diltiih, The much praised wine of the distant Rhine, and the beer praised ovoruuiehl Thonlo of dear old Umilon ami tho port of southern ellmcs- All, ml Inllii., have I taken In a hundred thou sand times. Yet, as I nfiui'Uiuiilloiioil, thoto other ohsrms are naught Compared with the paramount gorguouinoM with which the west Is fraught! For art and nature aro just tho samo In the land where tho porker grows, Ami the paint keeps getting redder tho farther out west one goes, Our savants havo never discovered tho reason why this Is so, And ninety per cent, of the Inyinon oaro lots than the savants know It answers every purpose, that this Is manifest! The paint keeps gutting redder tho farther you go out west! Glva mo no homo 'nenth tho palo pink doino of European skies No cot for mo by tho salmon sea that far to tho southward llesl But away out west I would build my nest on top of a carmine hill, Whcru 1 can paint without restraint, creation rudder still! Ktigono Field In Chicago News. Kxplulnlng Ills Theory, Tho Stevenson Street Colored church held nu luformnl lllhlo meeting last Friday night, and tho minister a recent "cull" gave a talk on tho thrilling story of tho uxodtis. To account for tho safe passage of tho Israelites over tho Ited sea tlio minister submitted a theory that tho Hed sea was frozen over and thus af forded the (teoplo of God a means of csoupu from the cohorts of Pharaoh, "Vou see, bruddern," said tho preacher, smiling affably from .his rostrum at tho congregation, "du charrotsob Pharaoh war so hobby dat dey sank troodo Ice an dwouod do riders." At tills junctiiroa long necked brother aroso and saldt "I lx-g t' su'tnlt dat I havo studied do gografy, an de gografy say dat dat placo am do tropics, an de tropics am too hot fur Ice, nu I want to hah dat plutubcout do Ice 'splnlnedl" A dense silence ensued. Tho worshipers looked nt each other with panic stricken eyes. Tho minister filially straightened up, tho light of a now Idea In his fuce, aud addressing tho Inquisitive brother, re plied: "I am deotdy uratcf ill dat do brtiddor her. asked dat qucstchun. I puceed t'unswer It wit feeling. Vou see, doso times war a great many years ago, befo' doy hed cny gogrnllcs, nn liefo' dey war cny troplcsl" Tho worship went on smoothly nftor that, and nt tho next meeting of tho trus tees tho minister's salary was raised to 94.75 a week. San Francisco Wasp. A Good Color Combination Ho Oh, It's just his money! I don't se how- you can stand n man with a nose as rtsl as a danger signal. She It's not. Ilesldes It would be dif ferent If I were a blond; hut any shade of red goes very nicely with my complexion. Life. A l'Htal Objection. Trumping Jake It's getting to bo too hnrd work to pick up a livln in this coun try. Kf It wuzn't so fur nway I'd go to Central Amerlky. A man don't hev to do nutliiu there. Wholo country's covered with bananas. Nothlu to do but lay under a tree all day an eat bananas. Rusty Kufo Got to pick 'em otl'n tun trees, hain't yef "Course." "I knowed ther' wur. some drnwback." Chicago Tribune. What NextT Once there was a hired man who wai constantly astonishing his employer, 11 farmer, by doing strange and unexpected things. One day thu farmer went Into the burn and found that this man had hanged himself. Looking at tho dangling lsxly a few minutes, hoexclaimed, "What on earth will that fellow do next?" Texas Sifting. Nn Mttlu Tuct Ueijulrcd. Ho When Is that "leap year sleigh ride' of yours coining off? She Oil, I don't kuow yet. He I thought It was all arranged. Why tho delay I Sho We are going In two sleighs, and 1 have got to classify the people who don't speak to each other. HulTalo Courier. Preparation. Facetious Caller (who finds his friend ex ercising with the dumbbells) What's the mutter? Getting ready to write another i-prliig poemr Literary Aspirant No; I'm getting ready to sell one. Washington Star. A rrucllral View. Son Here's a horseshoe I found in the street good one too. Papa Well, throw it away. "Isn't It lucky to find a horseshoe?" "Not unless you own a horse," Good News. "Haughty Culture." Tom Hullo' "Invitations are out for it well dance Iu Horticultural hull on the 18th." Wonder why they left me out? Jack I'robubly on account of their haughty culture! Harvard Lampoon. ,. ' a y 'fir MORAND'S DANCING SCHOOL. Maionlc Temple. Mr. Mornml of Omaha Dancing Acad my lint, opened classes In nil the latest dances, Children 4 p. m, Adults 7:30 p. m. Every Monday. Circulars nnd particulars may be lind nt the Courier olllcc, iijf N street, KIHHT AUDITION TO NORMAL Tlio most beailllfili suburban prop erty now 011 the market. Only three h'nek from tlio hnmUumn Lin coln Normal University and but three blocks from the prooscd eleetilo railway. These lots aro now bring placed oil the market at Exceedingly Low Prices and Easy Tern I'or plat, terms and Information, call ou M. W. FOLSOM, TRUSTEE. Insurance, Ileal Instate and I,oan Ilrokor lloom id), Newman illnck, 102.1 O Htreot NEBRASKA CONSEK.VAORY or MUSIC nnd Academic School for Girls, Lincoln Nebraska. All llrauehesof Music, Art, Elocution, Literature, and Languages, I aught by a Faculty or Hlxteou Instructors. IZneh Teacher an ARTIST AND SPECIALIST. Tho only Conservatory west of lloston own ing Its own building ami furnishings. A re fined homo for lady stiulonts. Tuition from ls.00 to ;).() per term of IU weeks, Write for Catnloguound general Information. O. II. HOWKLL, Dlrcotor. Leaddg PHOTOGRAPHBI Kino Dust Cabinets 1 per doton. HpcoU ates to studonts. Call and seo our work. Open from 10 n, in. to 4 p. m. Humlays. tudio, 1314 O Street. U8K CREAM HOWAIID'B OF ROSES. Tht most exquisite preparation for tho skta Cure Chapped HaiMJ, Chafed or Hoaldal Removes Tan and Freckles. Positive cure fo-Hult Illiptim. Ladle pr nounco It nerlectlon. Excellent louse aflat having, l'erfoctly harmless l'rlco Twenty Dvi cents. Hold bv all llra-cUss druggist. (She gimt Has secured during 1892: V. D. Howells, (leorge Meredith, Andrew !aug, Ht. Georgo Mlvnrt, ltudyard Kipling, It. IiiIh Hlnveiihon, H. Kldor Haggard, Norman Lockyer, Conan Doyle Murk Twain J. Chandler Harris, William illnck. . nara iiuNsen, Mary K. Wllklns 1 I'liivua iimiHHUii iiuiiiui.I And iimuyotlinrdlNtliiKuUhed writers. lnnjinil llftilnanti lliimmlt s the greatest Sunday Nowspupoi In tlio world. Price 5c a copy. By mail $2 a year. Addrrss The Nun, New York. WOMAN is the pivot upon which Trade Turns. A numlwr of years ago I suggested to ono of my clients that ho place nn advertisement for goods used exclu sively by men Iu a paper supposed to be read exclusively by women. Tho nd vertlsemeut npeared ; it continued iu that paer several consecutive years. The actual mail cash sales, coming directly from that advertise ment, were two or thrisj times as great, reckoning proxrtionate cost, than cuine from the same advertise ment in any of the hundred puers my client was advertising in. Since then I have made these experiments many tlmo, until I Isdieve I havo a right to claim that the experiment hns passed Into fact. A'ufVi C. fowler, Jr., Atlretilsiny Kxjwrt. The fouiilKli is the favorite joura a among the ladles of Lincoln and adjacent country. Plant your announcement In its columns nnd reuu b"t results. C. L. RICHARDS, MOHAHUS 111.00)' LINCOLN. NEBRASKA. gyg JT7 V J i