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About Capital city courier. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1885-1893 | View Entire Issue (March 15, 1890)
- "v. u " M. TALM AGE'S SERMON. "WOULD YOU LIKE TO LIVE YOUR LIFE OVER AGAIN!" An Able niv.mr.o from tho Test "AH That it Mmii llutli Will lln (live for IIU Life," lob II, 4 Don't Look to the Past, but (litre Forward Into the future. llnooKLYN, Miirch II. Tho Hov. T. Do Witt Ttiliungo, 1). I)., pronehod In tho Aoudomy of Music, Brooklyn, tlili morning, to nu over flowing coiiKrcKiitiou. After oxtxiiuulhiK iijv propriuto passage of Scripture ho announced hid subject to li: "Would You I.iko to Llvo Your Ufo Over Again I" Ms text was Job 11,4: "All that a nmii lmtli will ho clvo for his llfo." How.ldi Tlintlmiiitriin. Tho Lord did not sny it, but Satiuiiviiil ittothu Iotil, nhcn tho ovil ono wnnUsl Job still moro nlllictcd. Tho record in: "So went Siitnn forth from tho presence of tho Ixirdnud sinolo Job with noro Ixjils," And Siitnn him Ixsm tho nuthor of nil trti tlvo diseases sinco thou, and ho Iiojiom by pol Bonliifs tho blood to jwlson tho soul. Hut tho result of tho dlnbolicnl oxorluunt which left Job victor proved tho falsity of tho 811 tnnlc remark: "All that a man hnth will ho give for his llfo." Mmiy a captain who has stood on tha brlilu of tho steamer till Ills pussseiiRcrsKotoli and hu drowned; iiintiyiui engineer who has kept Ills hand on tho throt tle vnlvo or his foot on tho brake until tho most of tho train was wived, while ho wont down to death through the oeu drawbridge; many a llremau who plunged Into a blazing house to get n sleeping child out, sacrificing his llfo In tho attempt, and thnusnutht of mar tyrs who siibmltt.sl to llery stnko and kuifo of massacre and hondsmnu'x ax and guillo tine rather than Mirrcudcr principle, hnvo provod that In many a caso my toxt was not true, when It says: "All that a man hath will he glvo for his llfo." But Satan's fnlsehixxl was built on n truth. Lifo is very precious, and. If wo would not glvo up all, there nro many things wo would surrender rather than surrender It. Wo soo how precious llfo is from tho fact that wo do everything to prolong It. Hence all sanitary regulations, all study of hygiene, all fear of draughts, nil waterproofs, nil doctors, all medicines, all struggles in crisis of accident. An admiral of tho British navy was court innrtlaled for turning his ship around In time of danger and so damaging tho ship. It was provod ngalnst him. Hut when his tlmo enmo to Ixs heard ho said: "Gentlemen, I did turn tho ship around and admit It was dam aged; but do you wnnt to know why I turned It? There was a man overboard, and I vvuuUxl to save him, and I did save him, and I con sider tho lifo of ono sailor worth all tho ves sels of tho British navy." No wonder ho tviu vindicated. Llfo is indeed very precious. Yea, there uro those who ileum lifo so pro clous they would Hko to repeat it, they would like to try it ngnln. Thoy would llko to go back from soventy to sixty, from sixty to fifty, from fifty to forty, from forty to thirty, from thirty to twenty. 1 puioso for very practical and useful piirK)sus, as will apjiear before I get through, to discus tho question wo have all asked of others, anil othors hnvo again and again asked of us: Would you llko to II vo your lifo over again 1 Tho fact Is that no Intelligent and right fearing mini Is satisfied with his past llfo. We have all made so many mistakes, stumbled Into so many blunders, said so many things that ought not to have Immju said,aiid'i!ono so ninny things that ought not to have lieon done, that wo can suggest at least ninety-five per cent, of Improvement. Now would It not bo grand if tho good Lord would say to you: "You can go back ami try It over again. I will by a word turn your hair to brown or black or golden, and smooth all the wrinkles out of your temple and cheek, and take tho bend out of your shoulders, and extirpate tho stillness from tho joint and tie- rheumatic twinge from tho foot, and you shall bo twenty-one yearn of ago and just what you wore when you reached that point Ixjforo." If tho proiositlon wero mado I think many thou sands would accept it. That feeling caused tho ancient search for what was culled tho Fountain of Youth, tho waters of which taken would turn tho hair of tho octogouurlau into tho ourlv locks of a boy, and however old a person who drank at that fountain ho would bo young ngnln. Tho Islund wussaid to belong to the group of tho Bahamas, but lay far out in tho ocean. Tho grout Spanish explorer, Juan Poiico do Leon, follow voyuger with Colum bus, I have no doubt felt that if ho could discover that Fountain of Youth ho would do as much as his friend had done in dlscov lug America. So ho put out in 161'J from Porto Itlco and cruised about among tho Buhamas in search of that fountain. I am glad ho did not find it. Thorn Is no such fountain. But if there wero nud its waters wero bottled up and sent abroad at a thou sand dollars a bottle, tho demand would bo greuter than tho supply, nud many a mini who has como through a llfo of uolossllos, and perhaps sin, to old ago. would Ihj shuk ing up tho Ktont liquid, and If ho wero di rected to tnko only u teaspoouful after oach meal would bo so anxious to mnlto sure work ho would Utko a tcaspoonful, and If directed to take a tcaspoonful would take a glassful. But Homo of you would havo to go back further than tot weuty-onu years of ago to make a fair start, for there are many who manage to get all wrong before that pe riod. Yea, in order to got a fair start some would have to go back to tho father and mother nud gut them corrected; yea, to tho grandfather and grandmother and havo their lifo corrected, for some of you aro suiTeriug from bad hereditary iullueuces which started a bundled years ago. Well, if your grand father lived his lifo over again and your fa ther lived his life over ugulu and you lived your lifo over nguln, what u cluttered up place this world would bo, a place filled with miserable attempts at repairs. I begin to think that it is bettor for ouch generation to have only one chuueoaud then for thorn to pass oir and glvo another generation a chance. Beside that, if wo wero permitted to live llfo over again it would be a stale and stupid experience. Tho zest ami spur and en thusiasm of life como from the fuot tliut we havo never been along thl.i road before and everything Ik now, ami wo are alert for what may upx-ui' at the next turn of the road. Suppose you, a man In mid-life or old ago, wero, with your present feelings and largo attainments, put back into the thirties or the twenties or Into the teens, what a nuisance you would lie to others ami whatauiiuliappi ne&s to yourself. Your contemporaries would not want you and you would not wnnt thoiu. Things tliat in ) out previous Jouruo of life stirred your healthful ambition, or gave you pleasurable surprise, or led you into happy Interrogation, would only call forth from you a disgusted "Oh, pdinw1' You would Ixi blase at thirty and a misanthrope at forty ami uiieuiiurniiioui uiir tiio iii.i.H tuuiio I nud xtunid thin" lnwi'-iniihlii iwinlil n u t-.u,. ' oud Journey of life. It U amusing to hear jKMiplo mi) : "I would liku to live my life over again if I could tuko my present experience and knowledge of things back with me nud begin under those improved uuspices." Why, whnt an uninteresting l -v you would be with your present nttnlntno. In a child's mind. No ono would wnnt such a boy nrouud the house; a philosopher at twenty, n scientist at llftit'ii, an nrchnsjloglst at ten and a domes tic nuisance all the tlmo. An oak crow ded Into an acorn. A Ibckv iii.uutiilu cnglo thrust back into tho egg shell from which It wpisljitohod. Hm.IiIo that, If jiui took llfo over again, you woulJ lime to tako Its deep sadness over again Would joii want to tr) again tho griefs and the hcarthrt'ukHiiud tho Is'ienvo ments through w lilch ) ou havo gonol Whnt n mercy that woshall never lie culled tosuirer them ugulu! We may have others bad enough, 1 n t thoMt old ones never ngnln. Would you want logo through tin- piix-ess of lo-lug your father again or your mother agnlu or your companion in life ngnln or v. ii r fl.i! I ugiiinf If vou weio iM'i mittisl to stop at tlieslxti"th milestone or the fiftieth milestone or tho fortieth milestone ami i-o-li nee your steps to the twentieth, vurcxx re nee would he something like iii'ic, .ii-dny last November, in Italy. I walked through agreiiteity witha friend ami twogiiides.aml there were In all the city only four mtsoub, and they were tie se of our own group We Kent Up and down Hie street,., we eutetisl the houses, the museums, the temples, tin) tln atres. Wocxnuilnod the woudetful plctmiw on the nll and the most exquisite mo sale ou the lloor. In the streets were tho the deep wot ti riltsof wagons, but not a wagon 111 the city. On the froutstcpsof mansions the word "Wi'leonie" In lullu, Lilt no human lxv lug to greet us. Tho only Ixxllcs of any of the cltbens that wo saw were pctrlllod and In the museum at the gates. Of the thlrty llv.t thiiusuud xsplo who once lived in those homes and worshlxxl In those temples and clnpMsl in tho-o theatres, not one left! For elghtis'ii humlnsl ) ears that eltv of Pompeii had Ixsui burled Ix'fore modern exploration scooiiod out of It tho lava of Vesuvius. Well, he who should I mi xwmittxl to return on the pathway of his earthly life and live It over again, would find as lonely and sad u pil grimage. It would 1st an exploration of the dead past. Tho old school house, tho old church, the old homo, tho old play ground either gone or occupied by others, and for you moro depressing than was our l'ouiieian visit in NovemU'r. Hesldo that, would you want to risk tho temptations of lifo over again I From tho fact that you are hero I conclude that though In many rcs)xs:ts your life may havo Isvcn unfortunate and uiicoiiHccrulod, you havo got on so far tolernbly well, If nothing moro than tolerable. As for myself, though my llfo has been far from being usconsccrut.xl as I would like to have had It, I would not want to try It over a-;atn, lest next time I would do worse. Why, Just lcxik ut the temptations wn have all passed through, anil just lixikal the multi tudes who have gone completely under. Just call over the roll of your schoolmates nud college mates, tlm clerks who were with J oil In the same store or bank, or tho operatives ill the same factory with Justus gixxl pros xs'ts as you, who have come to complete mishap. Some young man that told you that he was going to lw a millionaire, and own tho fastest trotters on Westchester turnpike, and retire by tho time he was thirty-llvo years of ago, you do not hear from for many y.-ai-s, and know nothing about him until some day ho comes Into your store and asks for live cents to get a mug of lioor. You, tho gixxl mother of a household and all your children rising up to call you bliswisl, can rumeiulx-r when you were quito Jealous of tho Ixillo of tho village, who was so transceudeiitly fair ami popular. Hut while you have theso two honorable and queenly names of wife and mother, she lx came a xxir waif of the street, and went Into tho blackness of d.irkness forever. LIvo llfo over again I Why, if many of those who aro now rcsxctuhlo weio x'rmlttcd to exjiori meiit, tho next journey would Ixj demoli tion. You got through, as Job says, by tho skin of the teeth. Next time you might not get through at all. Satan would say: "I kiiow nun now tx'tu-r than I ilia before and have for fifty years been studying his weak nesses ami I will weave a stronger web of circumstances to catch him mixt tlmo." Ami Satan would coneenU;r his loreos on this ono man, and the last statu of that man would Imi worse than tho first. My friends, our faces are in the right direction. Better go forward than backward, oven if wo had tho choice. The greatest disaster I can think of would Ixi for you to return to boyhood in 1M). Oh, if llfo wero a smooth Luzerne or Cayuga lake, I would like to get tutu a yacht ami sail over It, not once, but twieo yea, a thousand tunes. Hut life is an uncertain sea, and some of tho ships crash onho Icelx-rgs of cold Indif ference, ami somo take flro of ovil (Missions, and some lose their bearings ami run into tho skerries, and somo nro never heard of. Surely on such a treacherous sea as that ono vox ago Is enough. Hesldo all this, do you know If you could havo your wish and live lifo over again It would put you so much further from reunion with your friends in lieavenf If you aro in the noon of hie or tho evening of lifo you aro not very far from tho golden gato at which you aro to meet your transported and em paradlvsl loved ones. You aro now, lot us say, twenty years or ton years in one year oil' from celestial conjunction. Now, siiikw) ) ou went back in your earthly llfo till! ty years or forty years or fifty years, what nu awful IxistiMiiiemeut of tho tlmo of reunion It would bo as though you wero going to San Francisco to a great banquet and you got to Oakland, four or llvo miles this side of It, and then cuma buck to llolxilteu or Harlem to get a better start; as though you were going to r nglatiil to tie crowned and having como in sight of tho mountains of Wales ) ou put back to Sandy llixik In order to make a better voyage. Tho further ou you get In life, if a Christian, tho nearer you aro to tho renewal of broken up companionship. No; tho wheel of tlmo turns in tho right direction, ami it is well it turns so fust. Three hun dred and sixty-live revolutions in a year and forward, rather than three hundred and slxty-flvo revolutions in a year and back ward. Hut hear yu I hearyol while I tell you how you iiiny practically tivo your life over ugaln and bo all the better fur It. You may put into tho remaining years of your lifo all you havo learned of wisdom in your past life. You may iiuiko tho coining ten years worth the preceding forty or fifty year's When a man says ho would llko to live his life over again because ho would do so much better, and yet gix-s right ou living as he husulways lived, do )oll Hot sis. he stultifies himself f He proM'Hthai if horoiiM go back he would do almost the same as he liu- done It a man at green apples some Weilni'-lii) in cholera tune nud is U'j rnu into fearful cramps and suyson Thursiiuy: "I wish I had Iksiii muio prudent In luy diet; oh, if I could liv Wislnesduy over again," ami then on Friday outs apple-, j n-t a green, ho proves that It would nave lieeii no advantage for him Ui lUn WnliiHsday uvi-r iigiiiu And If we, de ploring "iir mt utc ami with tlm nlea of nil-provi-im in i.iug for an opiriunity to trv it over nuiii, yet. go ,,n making l lie Mime iiiutakes ami committing the saine sins, we only demonstrate that the repetition of our existence would all'ord no iui)ii ove nent It vvim given apples before, ami it woul I ho green apples over again. As si".ii as a slop 'upturn stiikos a nx-k in the InLo or ien ho rexirts It, ami a buoy is swung ni'r that rief an I marines henceforth staml olf from that rock And nil our mistakes lu tho past ought to lie buoys warning us to keep lu the right channel. Thei e is no excuse CAPITAL CITY COURIER, for us If . spilt on tho same rook where wo iplit lxjfwr. doing along tho sidewalk at night whn o excavations nro Mug uuido, wo frequently see a lantern on a framework and wo turn alde, for that hititeru si)s, keep out of this hole And all along the pathway of life lanterns are wt ns warnings, and by tho time wo conic to mill life wo ought to know where It Is mIo to wulk. nml whom It Is un safe. Besldo that, wo hnvo all these years lxsn learning how to Imi useful, ami tln the next divnile we ought to oc"oiiipllli more for God nud the chinch nud the world than In any pi ev ions four decades. Tlm Ix-st w ay to atonO for past Indolence or xist tiansgiesslou Is by future assiduity. Yet )ou often find Chris tian men who wero not couveitisl until they weio fin tv or fifty, ns old ago comes on, say lug: "Well, my woik l alxiut done mid It Is tlmo for m to rest." They gave fol tv )isirs of their Hie to Katnii nud the wot Id, a little fragment of their llfo to (tod, and now they wnnt to i. t Whether that Mougx to come dy or trngtsly I say not. The man who gau ouc-hiilf of his earthly existence to the world nud of the remaining two quarters one to ('lit istlan work and the other to rest, would not, I supiHiso, gel a very brilliant recop tiou lu heaven. If theio urn any dried loaves In heaven they would lx appropriate for his garland; or If there Is any throne with broken steis It would Ihi appropriate for his coronation; or any harp with relaxisl string it would Ixi a proprliifo for Ids lingering. My brother, you glvo ulno-tciithx of your life to sin and Satan and then get converted ami then lest uvvhlla lu sanctified laziness ami then go up to get your heavenly reward, and I win rant It will not tako the cashier of the roynl banking house a great while to count out to you till your dura. Ho will not ask you whether you will have It In bills of largo denomination or small. I would like to put one sentence of ni) sermon in italics, and have it under scored, and thrisi exclamation points at the end of the sentence, ami that sentence Is this: As wo cannot live our lives over again, the nearest we can como to atone for the wist .Is by nsloubhsl holiness and industry lu tho future: 'TIs vvortli a vv Iso innn's (uist of life, TIs worth a thousand )ears of strife. If thou canst lessen hut liy one The countless lilt iH'iieatli the sun. If this rail train of life lias been dclulmsl and switched oir and Is far Ix'hlml the time table, tho engineer for tho rest of tho way must put on more pressure of steam ami go a mile a minute in order to arrive at the right time ami place under tho approval of coudiictoi and directors. As I siii)hims1 it would Ixj, there nro multi tudes ot voung people listening to this ser mon ou w horn this subject has ni'led vv ith the force of u galvanic battery. Without my sa)lng a word to them, thoy hnvo solilo quized, Maying: "As one cannot llvo his llfo over again, nud I can niuko only one trip, I must look out and make no mistakes. I have but one chance and I must luiiku the most of It." My young friends, I am glad you made thlsupplii at Ion of the sermon yourself. When a minister toward tho closoof his sermon says: "Now a few words by way of applica tion," jxsiplo lx'gin to lixik around for their hats and get their arm through one sleeve ot their overcoats, and the neruionlc application Is a failure. I am glad you have mado your own application and that you aro resofved, llko a Quaker of whom 1 read years ago, vv ho lu substance said: "I shall Ixj along tills path of lifo but once, and so I must do nil the kind ness I ciin nud nil the gixxl I can." My hear ers, the mistakes of youth can never be cor rected. Time gone is gouo forever. All op Hirtimlty u.vvsl the thousandth part of u second has by one leap reached the other side of a gieat eternity. In tlm autumn, when the birds migrate, you ltxjk iqi and wxj tho sky black with wings nud the Ihwks stretching out into iiiiiny leagues of air, ami ho today I look iqi ami see two largu wings in full sweep. They aro tlio w lugs of tho Hying year. 1 hat Is followed by a fiiK'k of three humlnsl and sixty-live ami thoy aro tho Hying days. Kach of tho flying days In followed by twenty-four and thoy aro tlm Hying hours, ami each of these Is followed by sixty ami these are the lly mg minutes. Where did this great Ihx'k start IroinJ Kternlty past. Where are thoy bound Ktcinlty to come. You might as well go u-giiniilng for the quails that wliistlisl last year in the meadows or the robins that, last year curollisl in the sky, us to try to fetch down ami bag ouo of the past oi)xirtunilies of your life. Bo not say: "I will lounge now and make it ti)) afterwards." Young men and boys, you cannot make it up. My olrcrviitinu U Unit those who in youth sowed wild oats, to tho etui or llielr short lirusowisl wild oats; and that those who start sowing (ieneseo wheat, always sow Cleiicsco wheat. And then the reaping of the hnrvests is so illtlcr ent. There Is grandfather now. Ho bar lived to old ago IhviiiIso his habits have Ixs'iigiHsl. His eyesight for this world has got somewhat dim, but Ills eyesight fol heaven is radiant. His hearing is not so acute us It oiicu vvus and ho must bend clear over to hear what his little grandchild says when she asks lilm vvliat lie has brought for her. lln In- easily catches tho musio raised from supernal spheies. Men passing In the streets take oil' their lints in reverence and women say: "What a gixxl old man ho Is.' Seventy or eighty years all for (iod and for making this world happy. Splendid! (ilorl otisl Magnificent! Ho will have luird woik getting luto heaven lxs'iiuso those whom he bellied to get there will fill up and crowd the gates to tell him how glad they are at lib coming until ho says: "I'leasu to stand back a llttlo till 1 puss through and cast my crown at the feet of him whom having not seen I love." I do nut know what you call that. 1 call it tlio harvest of (ieneseo wheat. Out yonder is a man very old at forty ywiri of age, at a tlmo when ho ought to Ixj buoy ant ns the morning. Ho got bail hnbiu ou him very early and those habits have Usjoinc worse. Ho is a mail on fire, on lire with al coholism, on flro with all ovil habits, out with tho world ami tho vv orld out with him. Down and falling deex'r. His swollen hands in III threadbare Kickots ami Ids eyes fixed ou the ground, he imxsvs through the street, and tht quick stop of an innocent child or the strong stop of a young man or tho roll of a pros)ier ous carrlago maddens him, and lie curses so ciety and ho curses (iixl. Fallen sick with ' ' T'""" ,l" ""," V ,l','"""'"" A loatlisoinu s,xs',uc!e, I,,, ,es ,y long I ... ng for dissolution, or I,, the mght ,!,, on his col and lights apparition, f what he . 2rU h e'vuh ,1"" "V,,Ul " "'" U'- "" started life with a, g.xxl a pro-ct a, any ! H.U...II heA.ner,ca.u'oi,.lneut.b,.ltl,ehe is u j..t.sl carcass, waiting for the shovels' of public dim lly to put him ilvel lisu iiiuier. lio lias only reaxsl what hit sowed. Harvest of wild ontM "Tluro is a way imt sceineth rlglit to o man, but tho end tliousd i. death." Young man, as you cannot live life over ugulu, however you may long to do so, U, Hire to have your one life rlglit. There is in this august assembly I wot not, f,,r we are iui.de up of all sections of this laud ami from many lauds, soinu young man who has gone away from home and Hrlu.ps under some lit tlospito or evil pci suasion of another, and hit p.u cuts know not whom ho Is. My son, go home! Do not go to son I Don't go to-night where you may lie tempted to go 0o homol Your father will lx glnd to see you, nml your mother, I need not toll you how she feel. SATURDAY, MARCH Howl wmld llko to tnnko your parents a present of heir wayward lxy, rex'tifaut nml In his Hylit mind. I would like to write them a letter nud you toenrry the letter say ing: "lly the blessing of (Iixl ou my sermon 1 Introduce to yon one whom you have never sts'ti Ix'fore, for lie has Ixvome n new cieat tire in t'hi 1st Jesus." My Ixiy, go home nud put vmii tinsl head ou the tmsom that iiiiis(s von so tenderly In jour ehlldhoisl years A voung Scotchman was lu bat lie taken captive liv u baud of Indians and he leiiiued their language nud udoptisl their habits Years misl ou, but the old Indian chief lulu never foi got that ha had In his xismssoii n voting luan wlunllil not belong to him Well, one dav this tribe of Indians caiiie lu sight of the Scoldi n-gl incuts f loin whom this young umu hnd Ims-ii captured, nud the old Indian chieftain said: "I lost in son In battle, ami I know how-a a father feels at the loss of a sou Ho you think your father Is yet nllvet" The yoinijj mini Mild: "I urn the only son of my father, ami I Iiomi he Is still alive " Then said the Indian chieftain: "llecnuso of the loss of inv sou this world Is a desert. You go fns He turn to your coiiutryuusi. ltevlsll y mil father Hint he may rejoice w lieu he mss tin sun tiso in the morning mid tlm iris's blossom lu the spring." So I say to you, .voung man, captive of vvuywuriliii'Hs ami slnl Yout father is waiting for you. Your mother h walling for you. Your sisters aie waltlne for you. (IihI Is waiting for you. (In homo do home! A U'asliei woiiiiiii's I'ortlllie, Theio Is considerable stir among a uumlx'i of good I. idles, who aio now lisiklug alxiut for a washerwoman. It came about in thli way: Mi's Kelly, n woman nlxuit fifi yean old, living lu tho rear of (lisirge W. Stout'i lesldelice, on North Meridian stns't, hasbeel earning her livellluxxl by washing. She Is n hard working woman, a m Imt of tlm First Baptist chinch She suv s that about ten years ago, Ukiii tin dentil ot hei father, she Inherited n piece ol iiox'ity in St. bulls, upon which there win a tuoi tgage of tJ.fibU For this proix'i ty slit was oirensl fl.'i,(MH), which she Icfllsod t take, her friends advising her that It win worth more. She got no income from It, bill kept on washing, having found a renter, tc whom she leased the house and lot for f.V) mouth, ami ariauged that nil in e terns ol taxes unit I epulis was to Ixi applied iihiii till mortgiige It was a temptation for Iter to lake f 15,000 but she resisted, coiitlimisl at work, and tin other day she tis'eived IK dice that tho last pay luent had Ixsui iiiade, nml thu pio'ity which is in tho heart of tho city, was fnsi ol debt and all her own, being valued at nearly l-UI.IMKI Ijitei en me news of the death of n brothel in California, who left her a fortuiu of f is-l.UM. It Is said she arrai gisl with a St liOllls luan, for n fee of f l,IKM), to go to Call fol ilia and make lull settlement; that he re turned with i-IO.(KK) in nppiovisl MS'inlties chlelly L'uitisl Stub's boiiils, but that 'Jtl.tXX more is coming to her, which will lequiieliei personal provnee to niake proMr settlument. The ladies lose a good washerwoman, Inn Mix Kelly gams 100,000. Indlauasilii News. Nliiely Words Siillli'ient. One can learn with ea.se, ami In a very shoit time, all that is absolutely mn'ossary u in. ike one's way tliioiigh a foreign land. Helo men few hints: Take first a looii or two in prouunciH.ioii from a competent teacher; then master about u dozen verbs tho alixillarie-, ofcourxo and several other irregular verbs should bo no quliisl with perfect lloxlbillty. Among tlio most u-erul ol the latter are, in French, Ixiiivoir, vouloir nu duller; lu Spanish, p.slcr, querer ami Ir. Then the numernls should Ik' leatuisl, and so thoroughly as to Ixi ablu quickly to count a bun lnsl backward. After all, these amount to only two doon words. Next follow half a iIoa-ii prcjkiiiiinus and half a ilo.cu adverbs of limn and place. And lastly, brief vixjiibuliiries of minus; thino u use in traveling (x'rliiiis n iIojhi), at the hotol (a score), nml lu inquiring one's way alxiut n town (a doen). Altogether, I believe Hint a vocabulary of ninety words, carefully selis'tisl, would an swer every piossuig need Of course, in order to Ixi thorougnly comfortable, ono should carry with him a xx'ket dictionary. It i- far Ixjtter to procure this than mi) of the conversation mauu.ils olicrcd at tlm I molt stolen in royal roads to thu acquisition of language. Thoso aro not to Ixi ris:oinmoml od; their vtx.'uhulurlos contain words that one would never need, and omit some of the most necessary; their conversations an. highly gramuuitical, stlllo.1 nml unnatural. Boston Ti livelier. htoij ur ii iHniiioml, "That stono has a tragic history," said n man of Jewels as lie laid a diamond to lest amid a nest ot snow) cotton. "It comesfiou the Ue Ids'is mines, in South Africa, ami win dlscovelisl b) ULixilie euiilo)(sl Ii) thu com puny. His practiced eye saw that the gem was ii marvelous one lor beauty of color, ami a desiie to steal itovereamn him. Well, hi did steal it, and to cone. ,n the diamond alxiut Ills k''soii for tho coolies work almost naked in the diamond mines cut a hole in his Heidi under the arm. Hut the wound did not heal, und tho observant oyo of the foreman saw what was tho matter. A few days after lit charged the cixilio with having- stolen udiu inoiid, but the uogio domed it. " lieu Jack, the loi email, reached for hit sore arm, Urn thief mado a dash und run tow aids tho outskirts of the camp hko a divr. The foleuiau followed ni, bill the Heel fool si negio outstnpxsl him. He know that n sov ei o punishment uwulttst him If captunsl, und (eiiteied nil liis ell'ort on getting away with the stone, whose viiliio would havo intuit him rich for lift.. Hut Jack was equal to the emergency, and, drawing his pistol, shot the cixilio through the Intel, just as ho was taking to tiie lulls. Hu dead Ixxly was draggtd back into camp, Ids arm cut oixjii. and thli Im.uuUI.iI gem in thu rough wus taken from the insertion. It a tingiu slory, but true in gospel, mid only a sample of what hu-, Inqi h nod more Ihuu a bundled tune, in thu dia iiioiid iiiiiii's o South Alrica.-1'hiiadoipiiiii Illipillor Tito liiiilnii Notables. Alma Tndem.i Is ,x.rl.up, the most swell url.st ,n I,,,.n. lli lives in ,.,icely stylo ,cl, cou.t.sl and ., quite chunmyvvlh U.e I'r.ucoof Wale.,. Ho lsexo,,d,giy .we ""' " ''""-l""''Ul K-Ud of his sTxLl ,x" ,,.,. Tlll.y U(1, u , fcl , T , 's ex,x.,'io,,ce with Klin,, Voider, "he ,uller !s a tlionimrhlv r,,..,.. I .. .'haracter. nirelexs,,. i,. .1. ,...ir Usages ami traditions, wholly insensible to the nice IcqiiiroiiicuU of wx'let) -a Ixilieiiilau to ii degrix) A tone tiiiin hu vwitisl tho Ta deiiias, and tlm iiiorning after his arrival at Hull' hoiiMi Mil, Tadeiua was iiwakeno.1 by a rude knocking al her ehainlxr dixir. Much atariui-d, she aroiisisl her IiusIhiuiI, who du iniiiiilcd i i Hoi en tone, what vv.-n w.inUsl. It was Vi.) 'or who was at the do i , nud lie an sivered in a voice loud umnuu to lx heard all over 'he house; "I say, Tadeni i, old chap, whole do you keep tho scissor that you trim your culfs wlthl" You can xrhn)M fancy the horror that this blatant Inquiry produced ujion tho sontl tlvo, tho finical Tadoma, tho boon companion to the Princo of Wales. Chicago News. 15, ,800. Hli Nanus 'in William. 'What are vmi di ll g there, ilullghtcrf It's time for bienl.fiiit," culled a eotigroMtnuu to his only child n she Mood by I hn front win dow lu patient waiting "It'snll tlglil, papi; I'm only uniting for the Hill to pass," she loplled s-veetly, and the fnthor cnllisl the roll nml Hie beefsteak and prixsssled to tlm business of the lunriiltlu Hour, Washington I'oit still Nil lied liioriithiii As I. fur it 1lli. !5 !. tW &A W ri'or5 "lias she no pride no self rcscctt How i iVlisliiiH'iuill that fellow to smoke while they are promenading ou tho iivcuuof" "Oh, that's Chin lie Van Ninny, and she's afraid 'ople wouldn't know it was n man." - Llf.' Illl lloMIlt to l,1 (llllllllll. Theie Is a young ini'inber of a dlplomntlo corps lu tills city who lsdisxmisl to bo jxillle, but who is not always Judicious. Ho was conveislng with a lady who combines Intel liH'tual nml physical gtuces with a consider able digico of maturity. "I have enjoy n talking with you very much," he said. "It Is it pleasuie to Ixi lu the Mx'lelyof some one who has observed the world." "Hut, Mr. Ilrown," she said, laughingly, "Krluim I am mil so old us I look." "I was always sure of Unit," ho luturmsl, with all tlio gallantry of manner that he could muster Washington Host. Why 'they I'loiised lllln. Suburban Hallwnv Olllclnl (Unvoting In cog, ou his own Hue) -They say thorn hn Iksiii some fault found with the lumps on those train. Do you wsi anything wrong with thcuir Passenger No, sir. On tho trary, they are exactly the kind of lamps I Hko to soo used in curs. Hallway Olllclnl (highly pleased) pre Sllliie you are a professional man I I'nsMiigor Yis.slr. I urn an oculist. Jx change i:tniiiliiNllmi of History (Muss, School lloinil lnsx'Ctor Now, lxiys, what Is the diet of Worms! Cull any of you toll nief (Demi silence prevails.) School Hoard inspector Surely one of you can answer so simple a qui,tlou ns th. Come now (eoaxlngly), what is tho diet, of Win ins I Small Hoy (timidly) Dead cuts ami (.ilM'se, please, slrl Yellow Ine's News. i:tlllll!led llllllllll Nllliltiols, Debutante (confidingly -Say, liow much Is young Mr. Ijiuccrs wortl ' Banker Friend (earnestly) -lu round mini Ixts "Yes." "Well, I'll wrlto It down foryou-hero" Ami these were die figures she found on the . card: "0,(KHI.00."-Chlcugo Times. How lie IVIt. I Futlier Boy, If you don't quit staying out nights you'll lx) sick. I Boy Oui'ss Unit's so, governor, I'm nearly ' deiul now, but I feel llko u fighting cock. I Father How can that bof What a con tradictlon. Hoy Oil, I feel like tho chicken tliut got ' licked. New York Herald. ' I ruitlmr lliforiniilbni. ' His Iirdshlp There's no dixlglug It, you ' know, but ouo ihxis miss the lullueiicoof u I leisiiio class over hero. She Hut wo hnvo n leisure class. Ills Lordship (suspiciously) I haven't met them. Who nro thoy) Sho Our plumbers und messenger lxiys. Llf... He Could k)y the simile. "I swear by yon mixiii," she cried, "bufoio meeting you I never lovisl mortal mini." Ho clutched her with nu enthusiastic grasp, murmuring in a voico whoo every nccent wns fulily smothered in tiuih: "And I, darling, can say the same of the tlmo Ix'fore 1 mot you." Philadelphia Tunes. All Titslrs .soiled. Now Clerk I notice some of these hnnol of apples aro markisl X, nml somo.. Aro they diirei out kinds) Dealer No, sumo kind, Imt iHHercntly packisl. Somo customiTs want u barrel o)K'iied at the Ixittom and somo ut tho top. Now York Wis-kly. Ills l.ltlle I'm,, j Cliiirley Iivelox (w ho tsss 11 chiinco to sa ' Miiuutliiiit; really bright) Weally, .Miss I Sipiclcher, you vvemiuil mo of u cow oner's ' juwy. Miss Suelcher Yes) Why, pray I , Churley Ixvolox Why, you sit on a Ixxlj so, you know. Life. Can't ll Denied. "Havo you rend Smlthers' Ixxikl" "No." "Why, you said in your rovlow that it was a i;rout story." "Well, Unit's all rltiht; Smlthers told me that himself." IIarx'i's Hnzar. I WI10 fun Tell'.' Violet Dix-s a triiuip over o to heaven I Sister I Mipxsu somo of them do. liy do you usk I Violet 1 didn't know but thoy would bo tcx luzy to work their wiik. Onco a Wts-k A lllntliictluii wltli No IHlli-icnce, Defeatisl I'usillut It. 1 t.'iliucil -Alas, llll! I nm undone! Trainer l)h, no yu uren't, iai.l. (lit up: Youatooul duiitiup. -Hiirluij;ion Ki-s I'lViw. Currant Art. CliromoAueiit Dounyof your family tuk loli let 111 em rent 111!, uuuiuiiiof runner's Ife-.M) dalM iIks, hi S puts lip Jelly kit mhwii. Cnu ii.,o ' 1 , . . I hut W1111I1I M'i'iii to lln , I'l.ifn Mi'l'm kit Wliere enn I Rot UfkoU for 1 plle lUhtf .Mci'inckle -At tho lxi olllee, I ups Y"liow ine's Novvs. A. Dlrt'tte.l. Tisl-She acwpicl him after haviug r furd him. Ned - So ho wus tdia'icn U.'foro taken. Now Yotk Sun. j It' ihmhyf it x$lti c.5i?- . -i.s, r J"MT T.' & v i 3 " WESTERFIELD'S Palace Bath Shaving PARLORS. Ladies and Children's - Hair - Cuttin g A..' ...A! TY. COK. ij - (I STS., Ni;V IIUUU IIL'K Roberts & Co. 21 j North I i tli Street, Undertakers iaii(lEinl)aImers. Telephones ()Hiici.n Ui-slilcncc 156 Open Pay and Nli.t. E. T. ROBERTS, Harager. mm. E. THOMAS, UNDERTAKER M- lumcral Director. 121 S. 1 2lh St. Lincoln, Neb w 'Mi A i1 iiii 1 S imi h H w .7, rji W ' J v W ij a op W K Q s e D x 1 r $ n ' v CO z I l o tV) rt- "D o C JU J3 CO 17) o "1 I D 'i. 2 ij 1 & s? O Z a l 3 1 X ? ft) r zr O rt- r
