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About Capital city courier. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1885-1893 | View Entire Issue (June 15, 1889)
T CAPITAL CITY COURIER, SATURDAY, JUNE 15, 1889. it BURDETTE'8 PHILOSOPHY. Ilia UAin-IS-OH. While tlio Indian delegation was loafing .round Washington tlio prosldcntsnldtoOld MnAfrald-of-tlio-Ilheuinatut, " Why iIca the groat chief havo eloren wives!" And the Itrlm old warrior answered tlio great father sternly, "To koop hU vrlg-wann." AT tlJOOO TIDK. "Noah was correct," was tlio penslvo ro mark of tlio last of tlio antediluvians, as ho jMtontho sharp edgoof arock and reluct jtntly laved hi shrinking feet In tlio rising tldo; "ho said thoro would bo a deluge, and there's no dolugoon about this." And as ho chuckled hoarsely over tho baso remark, a pteryodactylooftophagaurlan, floating near by with a vlow to picking up anything that might happen, remarked that a fellow couldn't be expected to stand everything, And, oponing n mouth somewhat longer than bis entlro body, took tho humorist in out of tho wot. TOO MUCH riUrAIUTIOif. A Brockton man has spent forty years working on a plan for a ship railroad across tho Isthmus of Panama. And a man in Hits burg has been working twenty-two years at Another ono. Nolthor plan is yet comploted. Too long, that's tho troublo. Ono of those days a man who has been too busy to think much about it will get up and put a ship rail road across tho isthmus before ho finds out that ho has to liavo a plan. That's the way theso things are frequently done. A BAD BLIMDIR. Whltegoods awakens suddenly in the night, ees a figure In his room, fires and brings tha Intruders down. Dying robber falters, with labored accent: "You fired justlntimot an other nitnuto and I would havo cut your throat." Whltegoods, shuddering with ro morset "And you're only a burglar, thenf By Ooorge, old man, I'm awfully sorry ! why didn't you speak I I thought It was an ad vertising solicitor." IIKRB WK AM AOAIN. Well, sir, tlmo cornea round and round and round, doesn't itl Wo see by tho papers Mrs. Langtry is JW again. you can't alwats tlu What various sorts of fools one moots ill this pilgrimage. Now, hero is a couple of peoplo in Stamford havo gouo and namoA their first baby Methusaleh, when the little fellow isn't ten days old. But hold on a bit; we apologize. Who can tell what' ma hap pen f Littlo did Enoek dreaun, when ho Baaed ills first bora Mothttsaleh. how appropriate was the name. Bu4ette In Brooklyn EagW. Asked W, BUNanMH; J ., ! A wicked, wicked story is told by The Chi cago Mall, to tho effect, that a new reporter .on The Tribuno of that city went tho other .evening to "write ,up" a reception. ,'Hegot an very well until be met,a flno, gray whisk ' -sred old gentleman, the. center of ft' group of ladles and gentlemen in a comer of bntof tho 'parlors. The young man had 'jotted .down the names of tho .others and tasked tho gray bearded old gentleman very po litely: "Will you kindly givo mo your name, sir I I'm making a list of the guosta," "Ehl" said the gray bearded old gentleman, putting his band to his ear. "i. would like your name, if you please T' re floated tho reporter. "Ehf What!" and tha old man inclined bis head attentively. The young man thought: "Well, hero's a nice old guy to bo turned loose in decent society. I wonder why ho, doesn't carry an ear trumpetr But ho only gathered a lung full of wind and said in a voice that startled tha dancers: "I'm a reporter, and would like your name." "Oh, reporter, ehf What paper T' "The Tribune. Will you give ma your namof" Tho old gentlomait stroked his gray whiskers tendorly, looked at tho re porter calmly, and said quietly: "Joseph Mo-dUI."-Now York Tribuno. Dross! lo Kill." aMM- H sssssf -Life. The Future Generation. The sweet girl graduate and tho bumptious boy graduate aro with us again. Wo are j-lad to tnoet thorn and shako bands with them Across the chasm of years. We aro glad to hear once moro their plans for giving down trodden woman her proper sphero in life, and for solving within a few weeksr tlmo all tha oclal problems. We sympathize with them most heartily; for a happy experience has taught us what a blissful thing It is to know o much. Were thoy a whit less enthusiastic e should be ashamed of them, and predict tor them failure in tho coming struggle with the world. As it is, they aro our bopo, and they givo us fresh courage. Albany Express. A Or eat Scheme. Mrs. Oldrich I was very sorry to miss you last week. I thought I bad hit upon your day to be at borne. Have you changed itf Mrs. Nowcomo Oh, not I have no regular day. Mrs. Oldrich But your card says Thursday. Mrs. Newoome Yes; isn't it con venient! I noticed thorn at the stationer's. Tbey'ro such a neat reminder. I havo a pack for every day in tho week, so that folks will remember just what day I called. Boston Commercial DulMliu HE ARGUED t HE CASE. Ills Grand Destiny, "You bavo spent eight years in college, three at a theological school and two in tho study of theoaophy, and yot you do not in tend to enter the ministry. May 1 ask what special career you are fitting yourself fort" "I am btudylng for marriage with a Boston girl," replied the bcholastic enthusiast, bis voico tremulous ami his dark, melancholy oyes lighting up with att eager, u-ptrlug gleam. Chicago Tribuno. Nut a Hull's Kye. Hicks (to Briggs, who has had a day out at target practice) Did you hit tho bull's eye, old man Brlggs No, It was a cow, I believe. At Any rate It cost me a hundred dollars to fix Jt up with the fellow who owued ths critter. Boston Trun&cript. Shad and Strawberries. When the angels mails shad The devil was mad. For It seemed such a feast of delight; Bo to rulu the schenid He Jumped la the stream Ami stuuk lo the bouea out of spite. Wutw the strawberry red First lllumlnml Its bed. The aiiK'nU looked down and wars gl4 Dut the devil, 'tis said. J'alrljr )iiuddd bis bead, 'or he'd used all hU bones on the shad. "Jlaltlutant Pally Nevrs. flaw the Chief Jiiitle Got tha Itest of m Car C'omlnctor. The chief Justice nntl Justice Hnrlrui ustinlly ride in tlio street enra from tho Capitol to lliclr houses. As thoy nro both Rinokent they ustinlly cltooso tho roar platform lit preference to n wont In side. Now that the winter is breaking and the car door can bo loft open, tlio conductor object"), na tho wind carries tho nmoke into tho cur. For somo tlmo tho two lending jurists of tlio country let tho street car conductor lay down tho law for thorn nml meekly pawed through tho car to tlio front platform. Ono da last week they made It up between tliotn to nrgue tho ciwo with tho conductor, and provo that tho wind would carry tlio smoke In n opposlto direction from tho Interior of the car. The conductor began tho war. "No smoking hero. You'll havo to pass to tlio front platform." "Hut, my Rood mnn," expostulated tlio big jtiHtico, Intorposlng his body be tween tho conductor and his companion, "the wind curries tho sinoko to tlio south and we nro traveling north." "Can't help that, sir, them's my orders," said tho other, dogmatically. Tlio littlo chief justice, In tho mean time had stepped down on tho lower stop, lighted his cigar and was puffing unconcernedly, screened by tho vast bulk of Justlco Harlan. "Thero aro exceptional cases, other things being equal, where n law cocrcivo at ono tlmo may at another tlmo bo void. Lot mo cito you to coso 8,137 of our Common Law Statuto book" "Wo gets our orders from tho boss," said the conductor, firmly, measuring his man. Tlio tlirco hundred pounds of tho justlco wcro convincing, and ho add ed, willing to compromise, "wo fellows is expected to obey orders." As Justlco Harlan began tits reply, tho car turned from tho avonuoup Fifteenth street, tho littlo chief justice carefully lighted tils second cigar, his foco wear ing its poetlo rather than Its juiHcUl ex pression. H( was taking no part in tho case before tho court, ho really,dUti not seem to hear tho plea of his distinguished friend. , I i ' ; ' i j I, 1 "Let' mo call oyour attention r'to( tha jacti" pursued tho justlco, courteously, "that you aro not following tho lino of argument. Tho wind is a north wind. .By a paradox peculiarly scientific wind is named 'from tlio iillroctlon: from' which It comes rather than tho direction to 'which it goes. Consequently vaorth wind goes south, wo aro traveling north. A wind blowing in a southerly direction cannot carry smoko north." As ho saw that his man was weakening, rather from his sizo than from tho weight of tho argument, Justlco Harlan con tinued tho cose. As they reached tho boundary, Chief Justlco Fuller stepped down lightly and offered tho stump of his third cigar to Justlco Har lan for a lighter. Ho did not emtio or refer in any way to tho caso that had been tried before him, and Justice Har lan had another proof of what a cour teous gentleman tho chief justlco oi tho United States is. Tlio conductor remarked to tho driver as ho watched tho pair toiling up tho hill, Justico Harlan trying to puff out ono cigar before ho reached homo: "What a big man that is. Ho grew bigger all tho time ho was talking to mo. Think ho weighs &40 Instead of 300." Washington Cor. New York Tribuno. Nothing I Lost. "I will print It for you, if you wish," said tho oditor, kindly, as ho glanced from tho joko to tho Youthful Humorist standing timidly and wisely close to the door, "but we can't pay you very much for it, becauso wo havo printed it onco or twico ourselves, and tho man who owned tho paper beforo tho present company bought it ran it a couplo of years in a tooth wash advertisement. Dut HI toll you what you might do with it," ho added, us ho noticed tho falling counte nance of tho Youthful Humorist, "you might tako it to Tho Educator and Palla dium; they aro running a Prizo Joko de partment in their Sunday edition." Tlio Y. H. entered it in competition and took tho $300 prize. Burdette in Brooklyn Eagle. Agriculturally 8 peak lug-. Ho was a farmer's boy and very little. His father was pulling off his stockings ono ovening preparatory to going to bed, when his mother asked. "Freddy, what is your father doing?" Freddy liad wit nessed the process of treating ripened corn and replied, "no's huskin' his feet." Blnghamton Republican. Maybe It Didn't Come Over the Wire. Jenkins to Henkins (after vainly try ing to understand a message over tho telephono wire) That's rightl Get modi I can hear you all right now. Now Haven Palladium. The Ituwanls of Literature. Visitor You speak of this author's works as having becomo suddenly valu able. Why U that? Publisher Ho has died. Chicago (Jloba lie Won the Prise. ( jtWll j stj Diner Out- Walter, how's this? I have just discovered a collar button In my soup. Walter Yos, sab you'ade lucky man. Wo has prizo noup on Mondays an' Wed nesdays. A harnsomo gift in ovury twentieth plate, sah. Once u Week, NOVEUM23 IN JEWELS. Tho demand for fancy stones is groatly on tho Increase. Cowled monks In oxidized silver aro a now feature in poppers. Inkstandsof polished bronr.oaud bright silver nro nn Innovation. Tho newest comb headings nro of pla tinum and gold Intertwined. Link bracelets madoof graduated gold cubes nro cropping tip again. Colored pearls nro being extensively used In jewelry ornamentation. Chased silver mice, linked together by tho tails, form n unlquo bracelet. A rich looking scarf pin is u pearl ball dangling from ft diamond coronet. There Is again a call for coral juwetry, tho moro admired shndo being pink. Colossal spiders in oxidized silver Is ono of tho latest devices in shawl pins. A heart of diamonds, pierced by a ruby dart, Is n brooch of a high class order. Ono of the latest whims Is n tutninturo gold compass charm with a blue enamel dial. Pretty earring aro those made of a sapphire, a ruby and a diamond set in a trefoil. Little grunters with diamond eyes nnd ruby studded backs danglo from queen chains. Scarf pin tops aro formed now of two or three broad circular Wnda of gold in terlocked. Seasonable queen chain pendants are tiny enameled eggs in colors to simulate porcelain. It begins to took as though ladles' purses of tine wovon gold aro to mako their mark soon. Popular among scarfpin wearers U a mall gold knife edgo hand soy tho sot with tiny pearls. Tho nowest hat pins havo heads of transparent amber and carved to repre sent asparagus. , Soraebf jiheas wort" gold glove buttea-' r are beautified' with Incrusted' gold crusek handles. ., vA'gold dlak; completely covered Wtth wmkll turquoises makes a tasty and inox ptaMive scarfpin. H i AJ perfect imitation of alligator akut id'allvor is what is being utilized for'rid ing whip handles. , ' In gcntlcJmen'B ringatho bolchev shaak, richly chased," with a ruby center,' hA somewhat tlibtcall. Tho latest oddity in finger ring settings consisU of half a dozen bluo whitostonea set perpendicularly. Two bars set all around with opals and diamonds alternately form a bracelet of a pleasing character. Imitation whisk brooms on a small scale, of lino variegated gold, are the coming queen chain pendants. Hammered gold links in grotesque patterns aro richly set with gems and aro considered quito stylish. The fashion of wearing tho scarfpin In tho oxtremo corner of tho scarf is be ing revived with a vengeance, Somo beautiful champagno pitchers are of cut glass of various tints, with richly chased silver mountings. Among paper weight eccentricities is a metal boss viol straddled by a boy drawing tho bow across tho strings. The newest fad in scarfpins is a pyra mid of solid Roman gold with several small diumonds hooked on to tho sur face. Nowly imported specimens of carved ivory bear on their surfaco groups of traveling actors, full of life and expres sion. IDEAS FOR DRESS. Boas aro things of tho past. Tho turban Is more popular than over. Ribbons for use on spring hats are all bordored. Short capes have taken tho place of winter cloaks. Yellow is tho color of many of tho now summer gowns. Nono but American ladies put on their gloves on tho street. Qold embroideries are used on somo of the Easter dinner dresses. Blouses of wash surah silk will be a feature of summer toilets. Velvet ribbon has taken tho place of niolro ribbon for trimming. India silks will figure in every well supplied summer wardrobe. Tho fashionablo visiting curd is almost a square piece of pasteboard. Square cornered zouave jackets aro be coming to all slender figures. Gray, fawn and drab aro tho colors hi favor for spring walking dresses. Riding nnd driving gloves for ladlee aro short and have only ono button. White, green and roso aro tho most fashionablo colors for ovening toilets. Embroidered collars and cuffs should bo mado separate from summer dresses. Thoso ladies to whom tho stylo Is bo coming aro wearing their hair low again. Four buttoned kid gloves with heavy etttching on tho back aro worn for walk ing. Parasols with long handles will be moro generally worn than they woro last year. Largo studs or conspicuous jowelry of any kind are not worn by gentlemen of tnato. Easter gifts have become almost as much of an institution as Christmas presents. Smockek ginghams will mako some of tho favorite morning dressos for the summer. White and gold brocaded silk parasols will bo much used for hotel piazzas and carriages. Very finely plaited llsse, silk, muslin and lace about livo inches wide are used as collars, cuffs and jabots. The empire stylo of dress round waist, full sleeves aud slightly draped skirt has not lost its popularity. New York Press. 1'aner, Wo havo Just'reoelved a very pretty lino of papers for covering pnntry nnd closet shelves, eie. They are In cream, salmon, orange, mandarin, hollntroKi, royal purple, sky blue, Nile green and other colors. Indies should call and see theso paper. They are tlio now est thing out and add greatly to tho appear ance of shelves. I) To Htiiux City. The now U, 1. lino hatneeu Lincoln and Hloux City will lio oiKiti Monday. Tlio train will lenvo this city at 'J: IS p. in, reaching Hloux City at lOiIU) p. in. Will loavo Hloux City at 7 n, in., reaching Lincoln at liM) p. til. The.o trains will run through solid by way of David City, Columbus anil Norfolk, nnd will mako tho quickest tlmo of nny route, Thoy will connect at Hloux City with diverg ing Hues. This will maks olght U, 1. trains in and out of Lincoln, IMrntillntss 'Next to 1ihI1Iii. To tho residents Of Lincoln, Nob.i This Is to notify you that tho undersigned have pur elioxod tho right and tltlo to thu business heretofore conducted under the nanio of thu rVvtnl Hliuim Ijiundrv. and organized Into a corporate Iwdy In accordance with tho laws of tlio state or Nebraska, minor ino titio oi the "Capital Bteam Laundry and Office Hupi. ply Company ,"of Lincoln, Nebraska, wr, j W. Wilder has lieen employed as manager and wo guarantee that all work entrusted to our care will bo dona satisfactorily. H. K. Maodonami, J, W. IUhnhdai.k, W. C. Ixjno. WEDDING INVITATIONS .; i; V BALL- PROGRAMS, M6NUS k Wessel Printing Co., New Burr Block. DO YOU KNOW .ovi wapy axxeIlt features The Comer Now Contains? Rft f'UJM tc they are and ttfey c VI. Here they lire and tlfry comprise the best and most Interesting reading to be found In any western paper. ost' Interesting llne'for'Suiida iday Talmage's Latest Sermon, Page 6 Regular:-; 'New -Sfork Fashio,Ketter Fafge Our i San Francisco Letter,. Page ,t3 Washington - Society Correspondence, Page 7 Music, - "Jolly- Dancers" Polka, - Page 5 EDITORIAL ETCHINGS, PAGE "4 " Bye the Bye's" Interesting Gossip, Page 1 Airusement Notes, Petge 5 Women's Ways and Personals, Page 1 "THE SOCIAL WORLD," PAGE8 "Taken by Siege," Our Great Story, Pages 9-10-11 AND OUR NEW AND LATEST FEATURE Architectural Reviews and Designs ILLUSTRATED ON PAGE 2 ARE FINE. At this season if tho year our umusoniunt and soclul departments are lovr, owing to tha meagre movpniont of society nnd nearly tho close of the theatrical season. Look this copy over carefully and note how many Interesting features the Courikr regularly contains. We arc always on the alert for novelties and Improvements, and our readers may depend on our serving them with the choicest and best matter obtainable. We Print Do Scandals or Sensations But Clean, Pure and Spicy Matter ! If you are not already a subscriber, we should be pleased to place your name on our list. X 4 We are the Leading Carriage Manufacturers ! Our Stock is very Complete and Prices are Low. CAMP BROS j i i i i .! M Come and See us. Old Buggies taken in Exchange for New Ones. Il Telephone 664. Cor. Tenth and M Sts.