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About Capital city courier. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1885-1893 | View Entire Issue (July 14, 1888)
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YOUNG FOLKS' COLUMN.
ENTERTAINMENT OF VARIOUS KINDS
TOR BOYS AND GIRLS.
Tlir. Original Ht.iry of "t.lltln .nh
nrr," Whlrh Ihites Itnrlt lo the
10:i) nttil Hns In Do nllli r.ngllsli
Vi n r
Many nui-hory rhyme nru very old; so
old, that mothers miisthaxo rooatcd them
lo their children, In the foroMaof Oorinniiy,
long before Baxous or Angles Invaded llrlt
Inn. for thoy nro lo tw found nearly tho
tamo In both (Jormnn mid llngHslu butthcio ,
nrosoinoihyiuesof u tnoioiooont date, owl
ncctillnr to llnelniul. Tim story of "I.lttlo
Jnck lloiucr" nml tlio rhyme about IiIiii Is
founded on n rent Incldeht.
TIIK OltlOINAL I.ITTLU JACK llOUNKlt,
When tho moimitoi lot wero illssolred nnd
tholr uroiicily willed hy Henry VIII, In
JoX), Ahbot Whiting, of tlhutonhiiry, re
fused to surivnd'T hh monastery, so ho wns
onlered to scud all hU tltln deeU to thurojal
commlMlotiers hi Ioudou. After soiito de
lay tho nblxit resolved to send them, hut ho
was at a loin how to do so without tho risk of
their being sclxed on tho way. At length ho
lilt upon tho novel liloa of putting them In n
tiloand sending It ana proncntto tho com
mliloners. Ho choso for lili messenger n
boy uniiKHl Jack Homer, tho sou of iioor
parents living In tho neighborhood, thinking
that no ono would Intorfero with a poor lnd
carrying a pio tied up In a cloth.
Bo Jack sot out with his plo on hli Journey
to London, which was n long distance from
Glastonbury, Ho grow tlrod nnd sat down
by tho wnysldo to rtxt, and worso still, ho
grow hungry. Ho 0eited bis parcel nnd
looked longingly nt tho plo wltb Its high
raised crust. There must bo something very
nice Inside, ho thought perhaps plums I
Could bo not get oiio out without tho plo bo
lag any tho woivol Ho would try. Bo h
put In his thumb nnd pulled out a musty,
old, folded up plecoof parchment I Such was
Jack's astonishment and disappointment
bo peeped Into tho plo, nnd found beneath
it upper crust nothing but parchments.
Mow Jack could not read, but thinking that
tho parchment ho bad pulled out might bo
worth money ho put It In his iiockot, tied up
tho parcel nnd inado bis way to London,
wboro ho delivered up tho pie.
Whon tho commissioners opened tlio plo
tliey found that tho most valuable deed tins
one relating to tho nbboy was missing. It
was believed Hint tho abbot had purposely
withheld It, so ha was hanged without n
trial. An old -archmcnt was afterwards
found In tho possession of tho Horner family,
which proved to bo tho missing title deed,
and tho circumstances of Its preservation ars
btllevcd to hnvo suggested tho rhvmoi
Utile Jnck HorniT
Bat la a corner,
I Eating hH Christmas pie;
t Ho put In lili thumb
r- Anil pulled out a pluui,
And mlil, "What a good boy mu li"
In the Swing.
ITcro wo go to the branches high!
Hero wo come to tlio grasses low I
For tho spMcm and Honors nnd birds aid I
Lovo lo swing when tlio brvuzua blow.
Swing, llttlo bird, on tho topmost bough;
Hiring, llttlo spider, with ropo so fine;
Swing, llttlo (lower, for tho wind blons now;
But none, of you haro such a swing as mlue.
4J0MB ANT) 8WIS0 WIT UE, BinDIB DEAn.
Dear llttlo bird, come sit on my toes;
I'm iiut as careful as I can be;
And. oh, 1 toll you, nobody UnDws
What fun we'd havo If you'd play with mol
Cotno and sw lug w Ith me, blrdlo dear,
Blight llttlo (lower, come ww lug In my hair;
llut jou, llttlo spider, creepy und queer,
You'd hotter stay nnd swing oerthora
Tlio sn cot llttlo bird, ho sings nml rlngx,
Hut ho doesn't e en lco! In my faeo;
Tho bright llttlo blosom swfnga and swlngi,
Hut still It sw lugs l-t tho self samo place.
Lot thom stay n hero they llko It best ;
Let them do what they'd rather do;
My swing Is nicer than nil tho rest,
Out may bo It's i atuer small for two.
John Milton's Day.
John Milton, when writing "Paradise
Lost," thus divided his day recollect, ho
was then blind. Whun ho rose ho heard
rpAil n. chanter In tho Hcbrow filble. and
' waasV M
then bo studied until 12. After an hour'd ox
crclso ho dined. After dinner ho devoted I
blmsclf to music, playing tho organ or ting
ing, and then Btudylug until 0 o'clock. Visi
tors bo received from 0 to 8, thou ho supped,
and, having bad his pipo and glass of water,
bo retired for tho night.
rrcsldcnt Camot's Salary.
The president of Franco receives 000,000
francs salary, with an allowanco of 000,000
t rosea for bis expenses. Ho has tho palaco
of the Elyseo as his residence, and at
one park Is kept forms pleasure, unoiuu
lioa two hundred thoutaad francs amounts
to about tK),000.
Tlio uplo of CnliiU novrp saw r gentilno,
IivIiir nnd muring millionaire till Uncln
Itussvll Hugo went down tlicro tlio oilier day
to buy tho Grand rjouthern railroad. Willi
trim (low ii mint hospitality n ion of tho hotel
landlord lillrlu'd up n span of horsi-s mid
gnwi Mllllotiiilro Hugo it delightful rldo nlioiit
town. ITiiolo Him was profii-m III lili ox
pi roAlniifl of ploaitiu'innd after tho i1iIomis"i
oor put his hand light down In IiIh -oki-t
mid gnvo tho onus ni'iti n nliv, i omul, silver
ten vent pleco. Tho joutig mini was much
uiipilsed. lit- illil not expect nit) thing I'"
hni hud a hohi punched III thnt toil cent pleco
and will wenr It on his watch chain. Iowls
An Kyn lor lliiatur..
American TourW Impresslvo I Ain't It,
though I Whntdoynii h'oo I could biro
tlio front and sldea for to show our tonlel
IIiuIim-m HoRnrlly In St. Louis.
An old nnd very wealthy man of Ht, Louis,
whoso roustnnt comimnlou wwn, whltonnd
black dog, had been In tho hnhltof coming
to tho mib-trrnMiry at certain periods for tho
putpodoof getting tho coupons of his bonds
rnsluil. Ono day lio pi-esentrd himself for
that purpose, and tho cashier refused to glvo
him tho money Tlio old man demanded to
"I don't know you," said tho cashier.
"Hut I hnvo been hero before, and was
novel-denied," tho man nuswrrcd.
Thocnshlcr looked nt blma moment nnd
thou snldi "Where li your hlnck and whlto
dothntalwajs comes with yon, If y on ore
tho snino mnut''
Tho old innn's oyei filled with tenrs ns ho
told tho eashicr that tho tlog was dead.
"Well," replied tho cnshler, "1 am sorry to
hear that, but you'll hnvo to bring some
liody hero to Identify you now. I don't know
you without tho dog." Chicago Mall.
A Prrnoiml Illustration.
Hon. Amos J. Cummlugs tells a funny
story about n printer limned Austin. While
Cummlugs was setting ty in Tho Now
York Trlhuno ollleo a good mnny years ago,
AiiHln did "sub" work a spell. Ono day
Austin said to Cummtiigst "This oftlca if
moro honest than Tho Times oflleo."
"llecause when I went out todny I left an
npplo on my case, nnd when I canto back,
there It was, safe and sound; nobody had
eaten It." ,
"Now, just to show you how different Tho
Times printers are, while I was working
there last week, ono of tho boys went off,
leaving an orange on his case. I took It and
nto lt,"-Cb!cago Now.
Professor Pasteur Out, I must admit it.
My plan tor killing Australian rabbits by
Inoculating them with cholera of chicken has
American I'll tell you what to do. Just
couvlnco tho rabbits thnt they will have hy
drophobia unless thoy can get to you for
treatment and they will dlo fast enough.
Tho Very Itorso He Wanted,
Stranger Aro you tho superliitondont of
tho street car llnol
"I would llko to soil you n horse."
'Is it n good, lively onol"
"It was used for a bearsa horse fora year."
"Send it up nt once and state your price."
Tte Was No Horse.
She John, don't you think tho horso needs
n new hamwst Bmith has an elegant ono
He Sixty dollars fornnowhnnies.il Why,
I don't upend to exceed 1.1 for n whole new
Bho Yd, I know, John; but you're no
A Lightsome. Heart.
"Chlldven," said a Now Jereoy school
toucher, "always bo cliscrful. Whatever falls
to your lot to do, do it cheerfully."
"Yes, indeed, dear teacher," responded a
bright llttlo Hah way scholar, "oven ths
skeotora fclng if hen they aro at work." Now
Not Ilullt Tht Wy.
An Oil City boy of 13 gets up In bis sleep
nnd plays tho pinna Wo never hear of n Hi-year-old
boy getting up in bis sleep and cat
ting wood, or doing somo other useful work.
Aa tho old Greek philosopher fays, "Ho isn't
constructed on that model." Exchnnge.
Sot for Musicians.
Tho law allowing threo days' graco oaa.
noto does not apply to musicians; thoy must
toko up tho notes at sight as thoy como duo,
or tuo wuoio wm go proiesu .uansvuiv
Will Tierclso More Care.
A New York man recently dropped dead
through laughing so heartily over a Joe ho
was reading. Wo v. Ill bo moro careful here
after. Philip H. Welch in Tho Kpocb.
Ono Chance for It.
Von liaboony I wonder If I can do any
thing for this inustnchol
Barber Why, certainly, sir. You might
sbavo it off. Life.
Truo to Ills Principles.
Mrs. Jenks (nt dinner) Would you llko
somo of this ojstcr plant, Mr. Prim!
Prim No, thank you; I'm o. strict vege
A Itegtilar Hoy,
IIo was not nt all particular
To keep tho perpendicular;
Whllo walking t.o either i.Mppcd or Jumped;
Uostocd upou his head awhile,
Aud, when ho went to bed auhlle,
I To dovo among tl-.o plllo s, w hlvh ho thumped.
He never coi Id keep still a bit;
Tho lookeni ou thought ill of It;
Ho balauced on hi car tho kitchen broom,
And did some nice trapezlug,
Which was wonderfully pleasing,
On every lS lu grnndiia's harness room.
From absohito Inanity
Tho cat npprox'lied Insanity
To see him slldo tho tanUter so rash;
.Hut once on that mahogany,
Whllo tr Ing to loboggau, ho
Dpsct hU calculations Ith a crash.
And fclnco that sad disaster
He has gone about lu plaster,
Hot raric llko u nice lUlUn toy,
Uut tbo kind the doctor uses,
Whoa the bumps and cuts and brulaM
Orercomo a lltl'e, regular, lire boy.
Brook lyu StandaiddJolM.
A rrtr Points on niqilctto
Olven ly a
Tlicio Ma lU-ycnr-oId lioy In Cambridge
who I a giwt "society man," and w ho Is rO
forred to by hli fi lends on all iHilntsof ell
ipii'tto. Ho wn otoihonnl onu day giving
miiiio "imlnU'W" (o n I my nlwut lili ago, hut
who had, uppuicntly, uouo of hit filotid's
aplomb, Itoy No. !i, whom wo will rail IVi-d,
wnituylnj; anrloiiily, "Hut 1 nuAor Know
what lo Hay ma Kill at n party. Whut do
you tnllt nlKiut, any wnyP
"Oil, Hint' easy enough," replied thofo
defy nmu. "Pint) on sny that It' a lovely
night font pnttyt then joii osl; her If hIio
doesn't think tho rooms lira nlitllo warm."
"Yesfhitcirontlu'ly, from Fred.
"Well, thfii nsk her If slio's fond of wnllr
Ingi then thi'ii oh, ny Hint tho floor I
wry slippery. "
"Well, what iioxW
"Ohr-ovldently n llttlo tinlned-"tcll
her you llko licritcpt then" Midden Inspirit
Hon "imU her If she doei.i't want a glass of
nntcr; ho n long tluto getting It, and hy tho
tlmo joii get back sop.o other man 'II Ihi with
her." lloston G-nzetto.
Johnny, who N four years old, was play.
In tlio yard ono tiny, nnd n lady who liven
tloMi by w Ished to hnvo tho eggs, If any wero
Inltl since hr last visit to tho hennery,
brought In. Bho said to tho llttlo boyi
"Johnny, will you go to tho hennery nnd see
If thcronro tiny eggs therol Don't bring In
tho china ones; kvno them there, but If
there lie any others bring them In."
Johnny Matted to do tho bidding, and
soon returned Ith tw o or threo In oken egg,
and his plnaforo willed. Tin Indy, seeing him
"Johnny, how did you break thoeggsr'
Johnny looked nt her In Mirprim nnd saldt
"How should 1 toll whether they wero china
eggi or not If I didn't try them T Rostou
An lUieeillnuly Kxprensho Ansnrr.
A lndy who tlrmsotl elegantly and lielougs
10 mo mgii jwixii or social pluinngo mnde n
formal call recently upon a lady of her no
cpinlntanconnd waltetl In tlto'mrlor wlill
her card wat sent up. A tiny Heclmen of a
girl was present, who eyed tho elegant visitor
cry closely and seemeil much Interested in
her npicarnneo. "Well, my dear," remarked
tho visitor, with approval, m sho smoothed
out her silks nnd laws, "what do you think
"Oh," said tho llttlo gill, with tho charm
ing candor of childhood, "I'vo seen llotmcei
beforol" Detroit FieoPreas.
Didn't Want It Without Itulu.
Whilo tho cannon was being tired last
evening a llttlo girl of 4 years, who had novcr
heard a baluto Urtxl, liecnmo frightened, nnd
saldt "Mamma, I don't llko to have them
mako that nolso now; it Is well enough when
it inins." Burlington Frao Pross.
"Flossie," said her momma, "why do you
keep up such n constant chatfer, chatter, nil
me umoi '
" Tause I'vo got lot to say," explained
A Warranted Suspicion.
A llttlo 3-year-old, noticing n cow ono win
ter morning nnd observing her breathe, snldt
"Mamma, does tho cow smokef Habyhood.
Bonnie was asked If ho was afraid of the
dark. "Oh, no," ho said, "I- go In great
piles of darkr-Chlldren ut H6nu.
Trouble with Ncckwrar.
"Well, Bob, what do you look so mad
"Oh, I've liecn tussling nway for halt an
hour trying to fix on this necktie, Theso
now fnuglol tlxlugs aro enough to drive n
man' reason frVim its throne."
"Don't lot thnt llttlo thing worry you. A.
friend of mlno hnd bo much trouble with a
nocktlo that bodied."
"How was that!"
"Tho slK-rlff adjusted tho Ho." Lincoln
Wautl Growing Old Gracefully.
no stuttered terribly, and ono day ho be
gan to tell a story, prefacing It by saying
that It was "im-tu-tnctise."
Ho kept nt It it long whllo, but succeeded
ln getting only a llttlo was along in it, and
at last m counsry cousin, from Wnyback
Center, rang the bell,
"W-w-what you r-r-r-rlnglng your d-d-darned
old b-Ub-bell f-forf I t-t-tcll you this
M-s-st-story's a bdfbrand n-n-n-n-now onolN
"Porhai It was when you began it," re
plied his tormentor. Time.
Gets- Etcrjthlnc Id the Lease.
Magistrate (to prisoner arrested for as
sault) You. admit, then, that J oil pulled
your landlord's nccr
Magistrate Don't you know you had no
right to do that!
Prisoner No,, sir; If I bad no right to pull
hlsnose ho-would liave had it down iu tho
lea. Now Yovk San.
TU CokMer Cot In Ahead.
Missionary Aren't yon sorry yon
Into-tlio bank, my friend f
Convict Uetcher your llfo I am. Yer
dou't a'ose I'd a dono It, does yer, 'f I'd
knoweddoceshcer'dhnd two hours the start
mo I Judgo.
rnylng Illm llscli.
"One good turh deserves another," said tho.
slnlni: car porter as ho turned over tho
mattress of tho iwssengcr who bad feed liltui
him liberally. Hotel Mall.
Taking u Hopeful Vlow,
"I nm afraid, Bobby," said his mother,
"that when your papa comes homo all tiicl
out with III duy's wotk, und learns what n
naughty loy you have been, ho will punish
i "rcrhnps, ma," replied Bobby, with hope
strong In his breast, "he will bo too tired to
foci llko punishing me." Tho Epoch.
1 v h
SCIKNCK AND PltOGRKSS.
POPULAR SCIENCE NEWS
A Cm loin .Iminnmo Wat Troo, tlio rrijlt
of Wlilih YloliU n Vrcetiililo Wax
Clonrly llrnrintillnit Iho l'loilnrt of tlio
Tho JnpnueM) wax troo, IlliHtinted In tlio ac
company lug cut, It found In Jnpaii,Chliia and
throughout tho I'att Indies generally. It lie
loitgi to tho rims or iiunnch family, and hns
tho sjioclflo iinmo Hucccdnnen. Ill tho .In pan
language It ii railed I in re.
tiik japankhic wax Titr.v:.
Thotivo,beglnstobenr fruit when llvo or
six years old nnd lucrcaseu its product every
year, until nt fifty yrarn n single tree will
produce UJO iotiiidj of berries, from which
about Mivcnty pounds of wax can bo ol
tallied. This wax, mys Nature, Is formed in
tlio middle of tho berry, between tho need
nnd tho skin, llko tho pulp of a grnpo. It I
extruded by boiling tho licrrlci In water,
and allowing It to cool, when tho wax nepar
ates out iu n solid enke.
This vegetnblo wax closely resembles the
product of tho hoitoy beo. It Is readily
Monclied, li not greasy to tho touch, hns tho
high specific gravity of 0.07 and melts nt
ttfdegs. V.n llttlo lower than beeswax.
which melts at I-fJdcgs. It is largely used
by the Chinese inthnmauufactnrBof rnndles,
which) are composed either entirely of wax,
or mixed wltb tallow or other fats. Tho
principal port of exjiort l the-city of Osaka,
from wheuce. In rsToy nearly two million
IKMinds of tho wax, worth abont fifteen cents
a pounds were-shipped to-London.
A treo of this same- family, the- Rhus rcnl
clfenv (Japanese ourouchi),. also grows in
Japum and produces the' resin or gam tssed
In tho manufacture of the famous' htctper
waro. In this country tho uso of sunmclj in
tanning Is wclH kaowir,. andi notwithstanding
thoso "black. sheeri" thopolaondvy and dog
wood, tho Rhus-family must bo considered
as very useful and! vnluablo members of the
vegetablo klngdomi III' tho- cut aro repre
sented tho donor, leaf and1 fruit of the-IQu
succcdanon-,.or Jopam wax, tree.
Mineralogists and. oounoissours hnvo- t
late boon considerably Interested over tho-
excellent Imltntions of rabies wrought by
modern science. Numerous analyses, says
Jewelers' Circular, show that theso artificial!
rubles did not retain n traco of bsryto, nndi
that thoy wero 'formed by puronlumlnlumi
colored by traces of chrome, Tho crystals
nro regular and of ndhmantino luster. They
aro of perfect transparency, ns hanbos nat
ural rubles nnd 'cut topaz. Llkothe natural)
rubles, thoy turn black-on being heated, .but
resume their color after getting coldingaiu
Having thus produced' by synthesis rhoinbo
hedrnl crystals of rubles-wltliall tho physlcall
nnd chemical properties of tho most beautiful!
natural rubles, and forming thorn Indium
trlx which may lie compared to that inclos
luir tho natural mineral, Frcuiy and Vbr-
nucil Itollovo thoy hnvo definitely settledl
tho question of tlio origin of rubles. SO' fnr
tho exnorlmcnts bare becu madowitlii GO)
grams of material only, ami tho crystals havo-
therefore been comparatively small, notfoxt-
ccedlnc 0.03 of nmlneh In diameter, liio
authors, howevcrr proposo to continue thelrr
experiments on n larger scale, aud cxpoct.toi
bo able to mako rublesof largo dlmertslims.
A I'neumntl AinusaniouU
Numbered with other pncuinatlo omuw
mentB Is tho trick of putting a lighted tcnndlo
underwater. This. Is. not only an amusing:
enterralnmont for the. parlor, but nu In
structlvoono to-tha younger members of. m
Procure a good i sized! cork, or' bung; upom
this plncoabmnll lighted tnpert then sot ltr
ntlont iu n pall of wnter. Iiow, wiiu a sicauy
hand, invert n. large drinking glass over tho
light, nml push it carefully down Into. tho
water. Tho alass bolnir full of air prevente'
tho wnter entering It. You may thus sea thoi
candloburn under' writer, nnd.briug It up
again to tho surface, still alight. This ex
periment, simple as Itils, torrcs to.elucldatsv
that tiscful contrlvauco calletl tho diving;
bolUbolug perfonnetlpn thij-sanw principle
Jk LlQHTtD CAXOI-K VNDCIt WATER.
Tlio largest drluklng glass holds but half a
pint, so thnt your diving light soon goc3out
tor tho want of nJr. As an average, a burn
big candlo consumes as ruuch air as a man,
and ho requires nearly n gallon of air every
minute, so mat, nccoruing 10 tuo size oi mu
glass over tho flame, you can calculate how
many seconds It will remain alight; of;
course, a largo flamo requires moro air than
a small ono. For this and several other ox
perlmcnts, a quart liell glnss Is very useful,
but, being expensive, it is not fouud iu overy
parlor laboratory, ouo Is, however, easily
mado from a green glass plcklo bottlot get a
glazier to cut oft the bottom, and you havo a
bell glass that Chilton would not vojact. )
Foot trlmmlngi on eklrU aro bolng revived,
and occasionally a slngh ftouuco of cowM
erablo depth Is teen.
f2j&r'$TSdL vfeA. ii
! I l& ibs t S9EM.
Blia was tho reigning bellol "
Htrnlghtwny la lovn 1 fell;
1'oU-ut bt-catnc the iell A
Too plnlu for iiiniklng.
Then for n time I n ooeit
Tor her sweet favor sued,
Till I'd tny courage screw e-t "V
Up to tho "asking." ,, v
Out of the glnro and heat 'vfi'
Whero to tho music's Ix-at
Tllpned I Ihi untliltig fot
Of Iho gay il nicer,
(lotitly 1 Iml my fair
Partner, so debonair,
Told her tho wholo, and thrr
Waited her answer.
Bwect was tho flowers' perfume
Wclnl tho cnshadonlng gloom;
From tho gay, lighted room,
Sweet strains caino faintly.
Turning, she smiled and blushed,
Murmured surprise, nnd (lushed,
Then, In tho ullenco hushed,
Answ ered tno quaintly.
Doubtless i on think filio Raid,
When sho had raised her head,
That which nil loiersdreadt
"3he'd bo my Blstcrl"
Tliat's whero j ou'o mado a guess
Wrong, as j on must confess;
Tor sho Bald softly: "Yes I"
Vest nnd I kissed lierl
Frank Roo Ilatchelder In Life.
Not Pamlllar with the Game.
Citizen Do you know anything about
Stranger No, sir, I do not At least, so
my friends say.
Citizen Thon you don't tako nny Interest
In tho national garnet
Stranger A llttlo. I'm manager of a club.
Wow York 8un,
Tlioughtful of Others.
Tramp Can you give me a place to sleep,
Woman Yon can sleep In tho bam If you
Trump Couldn't yon glvo mo a bed In tho
bwtisel I'm a heavy sleeper myself, ma'am,
awl 1 wouldn't feel right If I sboald keep you
wiwtlflg for breakfast. Tbo Epoch.
Where II Is 8tored.
"fa there any soch thing as law In this
country i should like to knowP sold an Irate
Individual as ho rushed into tlio prosecuting
" Yesy of course thera fa," was tho reply.
"Just gtanco tbrowgh that copy of tho Re
vised Strttntcs over thera." Mcrebant Trnv
elbr. Cain Arlr.
ElirnEcd' ITuslmnd Maria, 1 can endure
this existence no longer. 1 nn getug to blow
my brains-out t
Wife- (calmly) Don't nttenrpt It, John.
Youihave-ueverhnd any success-in firing nt
A TittIIII Threat;
"Them you absolntaly nef uao- to marry mol"
"IidOi" wan- tlw young lndy fll-iri reply.
"Havo- n cam MN Knjonpilr said tho
young-trill, wltUaidhtigerous- glitter In hU
eye, "consider tho-matter well'. 1 am tho
'publlshor of an ellto directory that is almost
ready, far the ptrsis." cuioagp.j.noune,
A Tortiftlile- bistsnrntati.
AiNbw York man owns ai piano, which cost
$16,006: It Is- not stated whah makes it bo
yaluabloi butt proliably lb ivifithes to give
forthia, Boumliwhen struck, lioforo 7 a. m. or
nftenil' p. m,, or when, tlio imlghlwrs noxt
door havwi- tho- window opsu. Nonistown
Tnt Shirtless. Sirlm.
Omnltm Cmnicllmnn ttravollug in Europe)
Native Those, sir, nno'ttlo Alps.
"Ilumphi! Thoy neudi grading badly
Trouble In tho- WlJiboriiool.
Vlkitor (to Mjs. McJIolllgen, bruised anil
battered) You aro not looking very vwli
thU morning, Mrs. McMolllgen.
Mrs. McMoUlgen No, mum, nut niven
rest yer sowl, mo leddy, wait till yo say Mw.
Conn Kelly h tho shanty boyaut. JlgOs
An I'xerllent Ilecomiiiinda)tiii,,
"Could you direct mo to somo restaupiwitr
"Yes, sir; go up tho street two blpcka and
you'll find tbo best placo in town,"
"Best In town? Heally?"
"Yes, sir. I board thoro myself."
"Is that a recommendatlonr
"I should say so. I'm tUi owner of tho es
tablishment." Nebraska, Statu Journal.
Ijulto ii lvrrorenctv
Citizen (to smnll boy outsld tho Tolo
grounds) Aro tho Wow Yorks. playing ball
Bmall Hoy (wlU.erIngly) Nnw, dey nln't
phiyln' ball; doy jest thlnU dey'ro plnyln'
ball. Now Yort Bun.
All Ilun IKivm.
Smith Squlvens has broken himself oeu
Brown Ah I how so?
HmlUi-l'ractlcing on tho health Hf t TJo
trolt Free I'resa.
A Terrible Ulsonso.
A boy of 13 years In Oil City, Pn., la n
somnambulist, nnd his disease assumes tlio
form of getting up lu the middloof tho niguA
to play the piano. It Is undoubtedly
worst com ou record, Lowoll Cltlwm,'
TRAVEL VIA THE
Ills (he only lino riiuulux directly llirotiica
I'emerund Mull l.tilie City, cnrnule toSnn
KrniH'lKooil'iil other Ciiliromla points an I Is
kiitiwu us tho "Mcriilc blue" lo the I'm; I lie
tontt. Tlio llurllngton Itoulc nun over Its
own tt nek uvery ilny In the? ear. Complete
trains of l'nll itimi l'nliu-o t'nrs au' Klegunt
Day Conches betw een
Denver and Chicago,
Denver and Kan. City,
Denver and Otnnha,
Kansas City and Peoria,
Kansas City and Chicago,
Lincoln and Chicago,
Lincoln nnd St. Louis,
Lincoln and Peoria,
Lincoln and Kan. City,
Making direct connections In Union DpimHh
lorull points Kvirlli. Kail, Houtli unil West.
It Is tho I'lonc.'r Dining Cur Line between
JllMtri rUcrnud Clileag. Meal only 75c.
Tho llnrlliutiu lllutug Cms were built ex
pro'lr for the service and ate iniiimgcil ev
tlrelv In the Interest ormir palroni.
ITfM THI'.dltOIlT LINK lIKTWliKN
LyTNCOL,N AND OMAHA.
Via tho Aslitaud Cut-orr. iiinXliig direct eon
neclhin with trains riirHt.l'aul, .MIunnpoUi
Chlcngdntnl nil points Knst and Northeast.
'Ihodhiirrnni'tortho l.lucolu-Chlcnvo sleep
ers ln tti(iNiiiularniut arc nt CllvUlllee.cor
U and 10th t-"., w linrc liorlhs miiy be secured
at any time,
A specially U made of Ocean Stentuslilp Tick
ets, nnd pnrlleroiiteiiiphitluir n tilp to tl.f old
not fall to oori'r'jxKid with tif Ourintesare th
IowihI, nmlourracllltlei uue(imled, iihvm' repre
sent eticliulld evei lliHtunmsliig the Atlantic.
Clly 1'ns". Aut., I.lurolti.
V S. I'llANClH, O. W. HOI DltEOt:,
(it n. Push, mill T'kt Agl., Oeneral M'gvr,
The West Shore Is theonljr lllostratei rasgs
sine published on tb's-Pkclno- cosst, and aside
from Its excellent llMrary fostuna, Ittodjcct Is
to convey InformsHoBVijybothi psnraati pencil,
of the great resources off tril region aadtb
progress of their development;
Special lUustrsted I articles appear In eacti
Issue ; also, serera! pages ott notes of the pro
gress being made daiercry section. Oregon,
Washington, Id&ho.'.MdnUnsi. Alaaltat iftab,
California, ItrlUsh iCohnablai and tho Tkeldc
Northwest In genenriuaro' IWng; Illustrated.
Tbo subscription price Is only $.. Itlsaot
only the cheapest lllastrsted magazine la tb
United States, bnt contains' articles-and' en
gravings ef great Interest to every resident of
this region, which cansHt ts- foondi la any
Subscribers for laffrtfcetro'm largo supple
ment oi cry month. i Tkb-flrstone-is a beauti
ful oleograph of tbd-" Ebtrsace to the Colum
bia Itlver." printed llniddo ootortt and each,
of the others represents 'some festuro of onr
sublime scenery. Tho -sspl4mnts-are-alone-worth
more than tbo -price of 'th' magazine.
Try It for 18N8, and after rtadlng; send It to.
your friends elsewhere. Tbuiwlll Obdilti boH
sntextalnlng and lnstrudUs.'
171-173 Seooadfitti Poetised Oresoas
The Shortest, Quickesttand Beat
Ron tee too
Atchison, Leavenwortlfj,Kfflsas City;
St. Louis, Cincimattj.WashingtoD,
Baltimore, MbvW and BOBtom.
RECLINING CMAIRS FKEE
ON ALL TRAILS..
rr-S"or furtlier Informalieu Folders, cto.f eall
II. H. HANNA.
City Ticket Auona, Cor. O r niblCtfiiBti.
D UAIICOUK, Depot Ticket Agent.
KCONOHn IS AVKAL'jrtl.
All tho l'ATTJUIHS ou wish to un durlnj
rear, for iiolhlnrjctikMivloi
THE CAMTOL CITY COURIER
WilhTw( Orders for Cut Piper Patterns of
yjitu own selection snduf any size,
BOTH, PUBLICATIONS, ONE YEARj,
$3,35 (THREE TWENTY-FIVE).
e Of nil tlo, irnp:nliios. "
CCbTAININO fiTOIllE', PlHCXS, SNII OlTlKll I.rsiuiit
ATTIIACTIONS, IIISUUNINII A 1ITIM 10, <XH'
Tine, and UousKiioin uaittiA.
Illiiftriilid tvlIU Ortgtiiut blrrl Xngrnv
mIm, i'liatonratttre, (ill i'letntrr (inrl
fine liiioitcnia, xmiklim It tliujl, iltt Maya.
slue of Amerleit,
linsh Maiaslno omtntns a coupon order cnlllllng
1 19 holder la Iho siUctlnn of uny pK&tern Illustrated
in tho fishloi rtrparlment In that number, nnd In
in- of Ihi ilw nnuiufacture I, maUIng pattern
urine tho jesrof tlio value of em threo ilollaw.
nrAioaiiwrrn monthly is justly cntiticdtao
IVorld's MotVI Magazine, Tho largest In Korm. tho
Urget la UlrciiUilon. and tho best TWO XVUIar
Family Mixcuh'o Ismeil. A will ho Iho Tnty.
ruiirth yir of lis piihllcstlon, nnd It standi nt tuo
head of Family Periodical. It contains W pages.
Urxu rinuto, BVxUW lrle, eleiftntly Hlotuil nad
fully Illustrated, publlsuca by W, Jsnnlngs
Dwaortst, New Yotk.
And by Special Agrooaet Com j
Maed with Us 91
Capitol City Courier at $3.25 Per Year,
4. i.1 1 S " LtLi -St
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