UNREASONABLE THING TO ASK Thirsty Tourists Inclined to Be Fin icky Should Visit Ireland During the Winter Months. Two New York men were touring Ireland last summer by automobile. On a hot July afternoon they came to an inn. Stopping, they went into the bar. A red-cheeked peasant girl was the barmaid. The travelers or dered Irish and soda. The girl served them and went on with her inter rupted work of wiping the bar. One of the men tasted his drink and found it tepid. “I say, my girl,” he suid, “won’t you please put some ice in these drinks?” Her mouth went wide open and the mopping cloth was poised in mid-air. Amaze held her silent for a moment. Then she found tongue in a hurry. 'ice, is it? And who the — ever heard of ice in July?" Whereupon she fell to polishing again. Shy of Signs. The proprietor of the gents furnish ing emporium always ate in the quick lunch establishment next door, but the owner of the latter had a grievance. “1 put out many signs,” complained he. “I advertise lamb stew, beef hash, roast giblets. I watch you many times. Always you take something else.” "I guess that’s so.” “Why is this?" “Well, I figure it this way," ex plained the haberdasher. “Whenever I hang out a sign* it’s for something I want to get rid of.” But many a slip occurs soon after the cup has been to the Up WOMEN FROM 45 tl 55 TESTIFY To the Merit of Lydia E. Pink ham’s Vegetable Com pound during Change of Life. Westbrook, Me. — “I was passing through the Change of Life and had pains in my back and side and was so weak I could hardly do my housework. I have taken Lydia E. Pinkham’s Vege table Compound and it has done me a lot of good. I will re commend your med icine to my friends and give you permis sion to publish my testimonial.” —Mrs. Lawrence Mar tin, 12 King St., Westbrook, Maine. Manston, Wis. — “At tho Change of Life I suffered with pains in my back and loins until I could not stand. I also had night-sweats so that the sheets would be wet. I tried other medicine but got no relief. After taking one bot tle of Lydia E. Pinkham’s Vegetable Compound 1 began to improve and I continued its use for six months. The pains left me, the night-sweats and hot flashes grow less, and in one year I was a different woman. I know I have to thank you for my continued good health ever since.” — Mrs. M. J. Brownell, Manston, Wis. The success of Lydia E. Pinkham'a Vegetable Compound, made from roots and herbs, is unparalleled in such cases. If you want special advice write to Lydia E. Plnkham Medicine Co. (confi dential) Lynn, Mass. Tour letter will fee opened, read and answered by a Woman, aud held in strict confidence. ! MAN THEY WERE LOOKING FOR _________ Fortune Was Good to Youngster* Eager for the Delights of the Moving Picture Theater. "Going in?” queried the small boj excitedly. Mis question was put to the elderly pedestrian. Behind the boy came other boys, all peering eagerly into the pedestrian's puzzled face. They hung to his footsteps until he found himself, a little further on. In the midst of a numerous crowd of youngsters. Each boy clamored for the pedestrian to accept a five-cent piece. "What is all this?" demanded the pedestrian sharply. "We are too young to go In alone," volunteered a ready spokesman. '*If you will buy our tickets for us we can go in with you.” Then came a eudden light and the old man smiled broadly. He went to the ticket window of an adjacent moving-picture theater, where he paused to count faces. "Nine tickets,” he said. “There Is a law against children,” objected the ticket man. “Are those little people with you?” "They are," declared the old man. "Come on, boys—going in?" Silly Qeustion. The 'bus conductors were on Btrike, and at the lust moment their placeB wero taken by all kinds of men anx ious to make a little money. These temporary officials did not know much about conducting a ’bus, and even less about conducting them selves with civility. In spite of the fact that a large number of them had had the advantage of a university training. An old lady boarded a ’bus at Picca dilly Circus, and, after they had gone a few yards, asked the conductor— one of the fallen stars: "Conductor, do you stop at the Ritz hotel?” “No, madam," came the reply, “not at present, that Is to say—1 can’t af ford it!" One’s Ancestors. How many male and female ances tors were required to bring you Into the world? First, it was necessary that you should have a father and mother. That makes two human be ings. Each of them must have had a father and mother. That makes four human beings. Again, each of them must have had a father and mother, making eight more human beings. So on we go back to the time of Jesus Christ, 56 generations. The calcula tion thus resulting shows that 139, 235,017,489,534,976 births must have taken place to bring you into this world you who road those lines! All this since the birth of Christ not since the beginning of time. Constipation causes and aggravates many serious diseases. It is thoroughly cured by I)r. Pierce’s Pleasant Pellets. The favorite family laxative. Adv. Alert Perception Needed. "You say that a man who occupies a position of serious public responsi bility needs a sense of humor?" "Certainly. The more grave and dignified ho assumes to be the more he needs a sense of humor. He must bo able to recognize humorous things instantly, so aB to avoid saying them.” Temporarily Without Reason. Parent—What is your reason for wishing to marry my daughter? Young Man—1 have no reason, sir; I am In love. • When our own Angers close on gruft it generally feels like a reward of merit. ' ALCOHOL-3 PER CENT J A\egetable Preparation for As- I siniilatiiltf lheFofldanrlRi'0nl» I Exact Copy of Wrapper CASTORIA For Infants and Children. The Kind You Have Always Bought Bears the 9 Signature * of I % In Use For Over Thirty Years A 5ramTvi iuni; yvriu ai one* the walls of his shop fell away to vistas of enchantment. "I'm engaged!” said Aurelle. In her Arm. upright, high school hand. Mr. Curran Htarted feverishly. "In a mu sical comedy and the manager says I can sing! Oh, what do you think of that? Not much, but enough. But Ada Norman says my face did It, and I'd never got a show if I hadn't made Co han's office boy laugh. But I tell you, Mr. Curran, we were right up against It! Ada and I pawned our trunks, and when she stacked mo out In the best clothes we could get I sailed Into some of these people. And I tell you Mr. Curran, the day I got my Job we were down to oatmeal cooked over the gas Jet In our room. But there's nothing In a race but the finish! Oatmeal Isn't so bad.” "Oh. Aurelle!” groaned Mr. Curran, "and that taxi, and the dollar you gave a bell boy over at the Metropole!*' The letter went on: "And what do you think, Mr. Curran. I was only In that chorus six weeks when Cohan & Snttz decided to put a road show out, and they picked me out of the New York production to understudv the comedienne. They said I was funny! I suppose I made faces and kicked up my heels-” "Oh. Rome! Oh, the Shakespeare club!” murmured Mr. Curran.—“So I'm going out on the road with the second 'Girl and the Burglar' company. We aren't so classy as the New York bunch, but It gives me a chance. I like new York. You ought to see the clothes I’ve got. When we open In Chicago on the 10th you Just got to come and see me act. “P. S.—Tell all those grannies who don’t like me about ‘The Girl and the Burglar.' But don't say anything about the oatmeal! “P. S,—Pretty soon I'll send you some stuff to put In the paper. “P. S.—I saw three little rabbits un der a bridge yesterday when the train went by. "With love. "Aurelie.” The congressional candidate folded the letter over so that only "With love. Aurelie” showed He gazed at It. Then he sat down and tried to recall Aurelie. What she liked, and how she laughed or rebelled—what Inevitability of life had made her as It made all the rest of us. He went about the next month. In and out of the county, speaking wher ever the need took him. It was not until his next breathing space, that, back In his office to pirk up the odds and ends of work—for the task of get ting out the News had fallen to Aunt Abby and his mongrel printers—he met Harlan While Wiley had been on his .vhirlwind campaign, Harlan had kept to his petty lawyering with Donley. He had no fight to make. The county committee took care of that. His sort of politics needed no noise nor appeal— It was not a part of the Cambridge \ lrginla traditions of his family. Harlan came In on him one chill night of October. Wiley had been hurt, for It seemed, since hts return, that Harlan had evaded him. Others had 26 noticed It. Arne Vance had truculent ly attributed It to politics—Harlan was going the way of the old gang, was he? Well, Arne had grimly forecasted It. Associations and traditions were too strong for Harlan. Curran and Harlan faced each other now with a dumb recognition of the hurt In each other's eyes. The old glad faith—where had It gone? Curran had been at brief troubled analysis of It all, even with the turmoil of his battle. And Janet's serene aloof ness, yet steadfast ardor for his suc cess. "They think I love her,” he had muttered restlessly, time and again. "I—why. It's ridiculous! Twice her ago, and—lordy! getting bald as I am —and everything about me—a trifler with women." And then he studied. "Well, that kid! God bless her! Noth ing ever hit me so hard. I wish they’d understand!" But to save Mr. Curran he couldn’t make out what he wanted any one to understand. He was In some bewil dering struggle, he told himself -and could not understand himself! He stood across his desk from the Imperturbable young man. How Har lan hud grown these years! His man’s bulk and dignity, his outgiving of power and personality. Wiley had en vied it even with his great hurt love for the boy. It was curious how things come to one man without price for which another struggles lifelong in vain. He tried now to come back to the dear familiar ground with Harlan, and Harlan would not have it. The younger man was unfolding a paper from his pocket. And suddenly a fear shot through Curran that it had to do with that hushed story of La deau’s. They had kept it well quiet, yet It haunted his counsels. But Har lan, his voice cool, tense, spoke of an other matter: vvuey, aid you seo this rrom the Chicago papers?" Wiley took the review of last week’s opening of "The Girl and the Burglar." He stifled a shout of amazement. The woman who had been doing the leading comedy business had been taken ill the first night, and a girl from the chorus, w ho had understudied the part, had played her role. Aurelle! "Saved the first night!” gasped Mr. Curran. “And I’ve been on the road and never heard a word of it!” The grim young man silently extend ed other clippings. The reviewers were surprised, fellcltious. Cohan & Snitz had "got by” with a musical comedy that had been on its last legs until the Chicago opening. And a new face—a girl with a funny personality had pulled it through. A girl who sang and laughed with a happy audacity. A refreshing person who had no ingenue tricks, no footlight mannerisms—noth ing except laughter and ignorance of convention. The reviewers suddenly recalled that this was the newspaper Usauty contest winner of—let’s see? Was it two years ago? No one cared. Only, to that fact Cohan & Snitz's pub licity bureau seized as only a drowning Hebrew manager can seize on a drawn lng J40.000 show. They flung it broad side; they screamed it on every fence. The star roared and resigned. It did her no glory. Cohan & Snitz would have deified their office boy if he could have saved "The Girl and the Burg lar"; and here an unknown western girl of their chorus had all the press with her, and all the public by some happy-go-lucky nerve. Mr. Curran laid down those clippings and wiped his eyes. “Where have I been?” he gasped again. "Asleep!" "Read on," demanded Harlan. Aurelle had been Interviewed by the Times. She said she was from Rome, la., but adored a. bull pup and lobster Newnurgh. She was interviewed for the Telegraph—Sunday, first page, sup plement, specially posed photos and a sketch by "Max"—and said she liked all the Johnnies and used their notes to stuff a pillow for the bull pup. Next day, declared the veracious publicity bureau, she received eight pups from eight millionaires and fifty mash notes. Wiley laid down the clippings once more. "The dear kid,” he murmured. "Eight million pups and eight million millionaires — I’d not care!” He looked up to meet Harlan’s eyes. "And two months ago she was living in New York—cooking oatmeal over a gas jet! She’s a humdinger!” Humdingers are not in the Van Hart genealogy. In 1742, Ebenezer Van Hart married Agatha Ann Bunker, inden tured servant. The Mrs. Van Harts of today never read the paragraph on page 28 about Agatha Ann. one time humdinger. Harlan broke out wrathfully. “Wiley! You rejoice at it!” "I reckon! The dear kid—let her go on just Joyously! All she's done! The money she's sent back to Lindstrom’s to pull ’em through! And now she's got Uncle Mich's patent leg paid for— at last. And Uncle Mich sent Peter In to ask me to come out. A regular party to christen Mich's leg—that is what Aurelio said we must have—with flowers and laughter and everybody happy!” Y’oung Mr. Van Hart arose. It was no use to quarrel with Wiley when his eyes were shining so! No use to re mind him of congress. No use to charge him with making a fool of himself. But Harlan shouted from the door: "Aurelie—you got her into this! And you ought to know how girls get on 1st these music shows—the only way! No—" he shouted on passionately— “you don't love her—it’s a joke!” The editor stood up and wiped his Blasses and looked after Harlan's re treating figure. "Love her? Confound the c:5y!" He knocked his pipe out on the desk edge. ’’Hey—O! if 1 was 21—“ he sighed. “But when I was 21 there was Janet, and I went out to see the tinsel world—■“ he sighed again. "And now Aurelie and her tinsel show! Yet I reckon I'm glad I am what I am!" After supper he went up the bluff road. AlonB this trail she had come flying to him in despair. Above were the hills in whose autumn glory she had robed her loneliness. There the bleak field about the Lindstrom cottage lay. Out of all this meagerness she had come. And he had lifted he.! Even Lindstrom. gaunt and silent, welcoming him from the ravening dogs, could not chill his Jubilance. He waved I tho papers toward old Midi. The house- I hold stared at him. "Hear this—all of you!" And he be- I pan reading the tale of Aurelle’s glory, i E'en John was stilled. Alberts pale 1 eyc3 shone. Old Michigan waved his peg leg. "Done come!” h« crowed. "Just as Captain Tlnkletoos and me said it was! | Aurelle’d done occupy all the lands and | states and countries! And I done got the new leg she’s been huyin’, Mr. VI- ' : ley. But 1 ain’t goln’ t’ wear it. It’s! too fine and shiny, and cost a sight o’ money fo’ an old whisky runner like me. Wouldn’t get that leg out in the rain and mud fo’ a pretty! So we hung It up in the parlor.” "But Uncle Mich—’’ "Finest leg, I reckon, in this yere hull government! And yere’s another man who knows Louisany where the birds they sing so sweet—’way down river where Aurelie done come from!" There was a scurry. Ladeau was out and beaming on Curran, terrierwise. "Or Mich”—he cried—"we struck up, talkin’ dem ol’ days! And I come offer my legal knowledge to dis case, Wiley." "Legal knowledge?” Curran had put the unpleasing fact of Ladeau away weeks ago—and had paid him pittances of, money. Now he was reminded. “I study dat correspondence school of Pittsburgh when I was in Kansas. Ah, dat law—it hurt my healt’. So I carry bats for Rube. But dat law, T know heem. I advise m'sieu in dis trouble.” “The Lord will direct me.” John’s deep voice had the majesty with which martyrs walk to the stake. The iron was in his soul. Curran felt the vanity of argument. But Ladeau sniffed of some compromise'' he was about to make. He went on with a great ha rangue of terpis and settlements, while the Dane sat in his Cromwellian faith In the right and grimly listened. On the table was a shotgun, and hanging on the wall, a repeating rifle. Outside his lean hounds watched the road with instant warning of approach. "But here’s your family. John? What can you hope, if you get into trouble, for them?” "God will answer. So I told the sher iff, Mr. Curran, when he came to see i11®* .An„eya for an eye, a tooth for a tooth. So I told him, and he went away. The holiness brethren have prayed with me, Mr. Curran, and they tell me God will see mv cause Just ” Wiley reasoned charitably that this was to be expected of a university that haa n° windows open to the sunny side. ‘John, I’d think twice—” Ladeau beamed ingratiatingly. "I havo t ought for m’sieu. My legal knowledge. T’ree t'ousand dollars we demand. I stand by m’sieu to get hces right Name of God-^-no? Den we fight! Curran turned sharply on him. "Now you keep still in this, Ladeau! Graft you?°n J°hn and Uncle Mlch- naw, are —T The Cajun shrugged. "I eat. I sleep. Up In dat loft with Uncle Mich,” he sighed, "and here is dis room unused, it wait fo’ mam'selle who run off fo’ de stage!” He sighed again, deprecating such foolish sentiment. But Curran looked past him. It was Aurelle’s room. Mrs. Lindstrom was by his side at the door, -Not a thing changed, sir—Just wait lng for her. ’ She glanced at John. My man, I think he's sorry. Aurelie was always a good girl—kind as could .. Har toil-weary eyes lightened, meeting Curran's own. The bovs crowded nearer. Old Michigan lifted his shaggy head. Albert, the pitiful pedler agent, raised his glance from the catalogs he was everlastingly at. r-ven John listened imperturbably. Word of Aurelie! Aurelie off in the woild doing some sort of marvel! Au relie. their defiant protector, the red coated champion of old days when she fOVpt the town boys for her ragged .tie foster brothers! Never would one of them, forget. "Done cornin' home!” muttered Mich igan— 'some day!” “And she won’t be stuck up either'” said Peter "She wrote Knute she was goln huntin with us up Eagle Point— wnen Nellie's pups grew big'” They looked in the tiny room. Spot less, the bed hung In pink and white f5:'"tz-. contrasting with the squalor or the kitchen room without. Her love of clearness, of pretty things: her buov ant hopefulness and nicety spoke in every line. On the dresser was her latest photograph in a frame made of a walnut tree burl which the boys had found in the slough and which Michi gan had dressed from its roughness. 1 ” f PItaher was a spray of late cosmos which Mrs. Lindstrom had saved from the last frost. Some way, for Aurelie they would shyly bring whatever of sentiment their hard lives held Un seen, some grace of love she had left for them still hovered. They were waiting—the little white room held the air of a shrine. And Curran, who knew of the clothes ! and food mysteriously carried Into this house, for which Albert’s piteous earn ings and Mich’s Illicit trade had never sufficed, since John was crippled, felt the throb of their love. It had done more than give food, it had held them up with hope, with laughter and with Joy. In spite of all; and even John no longer held her the devil’s agent. But he would not speak of her. Peter pulled open the drawer to her dresser. “Heres her little rosary, Mr. Curran. We found it under the clap boards, when the dogs chewed through after a rabbit.” The boy’s voice low ered tragically. “Paw, he throwed it there the night he made her run off— he said it was Catholic! And we hid it to wait till she comes home again, Mr. Curran.” Wiley took the bronzed chain and silver cross. A crude and simple piece of work such as a child might wear. But it was the only reminder of her vagabond life down river. Michigan touched it in Curran’s hands. (Continued next week.) Political Experimentation. From the New York Evening Post. New Jersey has set out to win the title of eastern political experiment station. The state senate has passed a preferential primary bill, and already the suggestion is being made that the principle of prefer ential voting will soon be extended to the election itself. The hold that the idea has taken is shown by the nonpartisan char acter of the support given to the bill. Voters will have the right to express their first, second and third choice for candi dates In the primary. This goes further than the Wisconsin law, which provides for first and second choice. Few states have laws for preferential voting, but the idea that a mere plurality shall not be allowed to control nominations finds ex pression in a large part of the south, whore a majority is required, and the de vice employed to obtain it is that of a second primary. The purpose Is to pre vent the victory of a solidified minority of voters over a majority that is divided between two or more candidates. It has been argued, in opposition to the plan of preferential voting, that voters find the ballot already sufficiently complicated, and that the machine can turn the device to its own ends by casting Its second choice votes for the least desirable candi date. But states that have tried the sys tem show no signs of abandoning it. The Coffee Cabaret. From the Chicago Post. Major Wallace Winchell, who leads the Salvation Army In Jersey City, is a ‘halle, lujah” soldier with a practical turn of mind. He has invented the coffee cabaret as a method of competing with the saloon for the patronage of those who thirst for the social cup. The first of the string of these new in stitutions is to be opened Immediately In the very heart of the cafe district. It will be fashioned after the manner of the tra ditional bar, with mirrors, polished wood trimmings and all the usual accompani ments—except the bottles, decanters and glasses. Even the footrail will be there for those who have the habit. But Instead of selling drinks and main taining a free lunch the major will sell sandwiches and throw in the coffee. The alluring sign. “Biggest tfehconer of Beer in the City," makes way for the “Largest Cup of Coffee in Town." It Indicates Fresh Hopes and Renewed Buoyancy of Spirit. How wonderfully tight the spring: wander lust for the countryside grips one! Spring fever, with all of its health-* fulness, is the harbinger of fresh hopes and a buoyancy of spirit. I noticed a passenger on a Detroit Chicago train the other day who had started out on his trip with the evi dent intention of becoTning deeply taken with one of the best sellers, that he might shorten the trip between the two cities. You have done tlia same thing yourself. But his book had been cast aside. He had read only a few pages. His interest in it had lagged. Prom the car windows he was count ing the fields now bared of snow. The ditches were carrying away the water and the still less sluggish creeks were* now streams bearing the overflow to the rivers. The farmer, in his shirt sleeves, was repairing the fences after the winter drifts; the cattle showing proof of a winter’s stabling and now heading here and there toward the meadows, seeking the new-green patches of grass; the farm help, in field and stubble, was putting into repair this and that necessary fea ture, here looking after his plow and there his harrow, and on all sides were scenes which reminded the traveler that spring was here, at last! As the train sped onward and glimpses of the painter as he worked on the weather-beaten buildings were revealed, the Interest of the tourist was aroused and, when I asked him the reason, he answered: ‘‘Spring is here and I feel its blood flowing!” The truth was, that like many others, he was planning the work ho was to do the coming summer. He was going out to the farm—his farm in Western Canada. He had his wells to dig, his horses to get into shape, his grain implements to fix up, his seed grain to prepare, and other de tails for the land that was ready to receive it. His was what might be termed an "unrest”—to get to the farm! Thousands in Western Canada to day are making the preparations that this interested man contemplated. Their summer fallows are ready for the wheat, their spring plowing is being attended to, fences are being rebuilt or being put into repair; in deed, the entire country is one great hive of industry. Railroads are in readiness to take care of a great rush of settlers, those charged with the reception of whom are prepared to extend every cour tesy and thus meet the rush with judgment and without the least fric tion. Thus, the enjoyment of the opening of spring is fully met. At many of the stations throughout many of the middle western 6tates, trains of settlers’ effects are in readi ness to move to Western Canada. Not only In these states are scenes of this kind to be witnessed, but, also, on either coast and throughout the east ern states there is the same activity among those going to Western Can ada this spring. The crops have been heavy and all reports are that the winter was enjoyable; also, that the prospects for a satisfactory year were never better. There is plenty of land yet to be had by homesteading or oth erwise. Adapted, as Western Canada is, to small grain farming, it is espe cially adapted to cattle raising and many of the farmers are placing small and large herds, as their individual means will permit. The illustrated literature sent out by the Canadian government agents tells the truth clearly and the inquirer should send for a copy and if you be one of those who has an ambitious interest, you may be the gainer by a perusal of such information— straight, cold facts in themselves.— Advertisement. Wrong Label. Grocery Clerk—What is it, auntie? Colored Auntie—Missus sent me for two cans of medicated milk. rfUDGE CURED, HEART TROUBLE. I took about 6 boxes of Dodds Kid ney Pills for Heart Trouble from which I had suffered for 6 years. I had dizzy spells, my eyes pufred, my breath was short and I had chills and back ache. I took tha pills about a year ago and have had no return of tha palpitations. Am now 63 years old, able to do lots of Judge Miller. manual labor, am well and hearty and weigh about 200 pounds. I feel very grateful that I found Dodds Kidney Pills and you may publish this letter if you wish. I am serving my third term as Probata Judge of Gray Co. Yours truly, PHILIP MILLER, Cimarron, Kan. Correspond with Judge Miller about this wonderful remedy. Dodds Kidney Pills, 50c. per box at your dealer or Dodds Medicine Co., Buffalo, N. Y. Write for Household Hints, also music of National Anthem (English and German words) and re cipes for dainty dishes. All 3 sent free. Adv. The sentimental youth who Is dead In love comes to Ufa again. 4