WAS DRIVEN BY STARVATION Jonsmith’* Method of Getting Key Was Rather Extravagant, but What Could He Do? _ His wife had been "spending a week or two at the seaside with her own people, and Jonsmith had been living the lone aDd simple life. But there was a curious look of calm despera tion in his eyes when his wife came back. And presently the wife began to make discoveries. “Where is-’ she began. “Good ness! What have you done with my dresses? And what has happened to ^ the lawn? What’s that black patch in the center? Why—’’ Jonsmith took a deep .breath, then spoke bravely and manfully. "Julia,” said he—"Julia, I starved 'for two days, and then you wrote to say that the key of the pantry was In the pock^rt of your second-best, tailor-made walking-skirt—not the bolero or the morning—’’ "I said morning-skirt, and not the tailor-made, nor the—” “It doesn’t matter,” Jonsmith in terrupted wearily, and yet with a touch of savagery in his voice. "I don't know a tailor-made from a morning-skirt nor a bolero from a fichu. So I just took the whole lot out on the lawn and burnt them. Then |T found the key whilst raking among the ashes!” Looking After His Balt. Daniel and Harvey, two old, expert fishermen, were “still” fishing for ■trout in deep water, sitting with their backs together, when Daniel acci I dentally fell out of the boat and went | down. Harvey looked back and miss ed his companion, who at that mo 'ment appeared on the surface, pipe 'still in his mouth, shaking his whis kers profusely. Harvey—Gosh, Dan! I jest missed “ye! Where ye been? Dan—Oh, I jes’ went down for ter see if me bait wus all right.—Judge. College Secrets. Bacon—What did your boy learn at college? Egbert—Says he can’t tell me. “Why not?” “Says it’s a secret.” "Nonsense!” "No; you know, he learned the foot ball signals.” j In the Midst of Luxury. "You have everything that wealth can buy, haven’t you?” "Yes,” replied Mr. Dustin Stax. “But It doesn’t seem fair that I should have worked so hard to get all these things while the butler and footman and maids enjoy them free.” Shoots First. "That guide shoots nearly every hunter he takes out.” "Accidentally?” "No, he always claims he does it in self-defense.’ This is Unkind. Tommy—Pop, what is a free thinker? Pop—A freethinker, my son, is any man who isn’t married.—Philodelphi? Record. No Prudent Loan. "Don’t you want Miss Freezem to lend eclat to your function?” "No; we’re not borrowing trouble ” Name the Line. Hubbubs—Have you any late trains to Lonely ville? Subbubs—Yes. All our trains are late.—Stray Stories. Many a girl who wouldn’t make a good wife for a poor man would make a poor wife for a rich man. A married man has reached the bot tom of the ladder when he begins to brag about his wife's relations. The sting of defeat outlasts the sweets uf victory. STEADY HAND. A Surgeon’s Hand Should Be the Firm, est of All. “For fifteen years I have suffered from insomnia, indigestion and ner vousness as a result of coffee drink ing,” said a surgeon the other day (Tea is equally injurious because it contains caffeine, the same drug found In coffee). “The dyspepsia became so bad that I had to limit myself to one cup at breakfast. Even this caused me to lose my food soon after I ate it. “All the attendant symptoms of in digestion, such as heart burn, palpita tion, water brash, wakefulness or die turbed sleep, bad taste in the mouth, nervousness, etc, were present to Buch a degree as to incapacitate me for my practice as a surgeon. "The result of leaving off coffee and drinking Postum was simply mar velous. The change was wrought forthwith, my hand steadied and my normal condition of health was re stored.” Name given upon request Read the famous little book, “The Road to Wellville,” in pkga. “There's a reason.” Postum now comes in concentrated, powder form, called Instant Postum. It is prepared by stirring a level tea spoonful in a cup of hot water, adding sugar to taste, and enough cream to bring the color to golden brown. Instant Postum is convenient; there’s no waste; and the flavor is al ways uniform. Sold by grocers—50 cup tin 30 cts, 100-cup tin 60 cts. A 6-cup trial tin mailed for grocer’s name and 2-cent stamp for pastage. Postum Cereal Co, Ltd, Battle Creek, Mich. Adv. HGML fty/’x-fitr ruzaboseii 'CMOlviRS'ON Dear Mrs. Thompson: (1) I am 19 and sometimes wonder if I Shall ever find the “right man.” I have many opportunities to go with desirable young men, but they do not appeal to me. Lately I have given up going with them and spend all my time at home. Until I find my Ideal man I cannot be contented. Am I doing right by not going with anyone and do you sup pose there Is a man In this world who will come up to my Idea of a man? (2) —Is It wrong to love a young man who has been separated from his wife for two years, but never let him know It and never give him any encouragement, yet be the bost of friend? I would dislike to discontinue his friendship for he comes so near my Ideal of a man. Then, too, ho has never given me excuse to do so, though I know he Is very fond of me. (3) —Which is correct—to take bread with your fork or your fingers? Reader. a) It Is better for a girl not to marry than tegenarry any but the "right man” for her. But It Is not good for a girl to put away all masculine society. Be friend ly with the men, let them take you out oc casionally, entertain them when you can and some day you’ll find the one nearest your Ideal. (2)—My dear, this Is the real cause of your giving up other masculine society. Don’t make the mistake of build ing your hopes on a married man. Don’t allow him to fill your life. It means sure unhappiness. You are a good girl now. Keep good even In your Inmost thoughts, and be worthy of that “right man” even If you never meet him this side of heaven. (3) —With the fingers. Dear Mrs. Thompson: (1) What shall I do with a girl who Is jealous of me and criticizes everything I do or say? (2) Should a girl sass a boy when he flirts with her or pay no attention to him? (3) What can I do to whiten my teeth? (4) I am 14 years old. Am I too young to go to dancing school? (5) What time should a girl of 14 years come home evenings. Thank You. (1) Just do what you know is right and do not notice her. (2) Tell him very seri ously that you are not the flirting kind and then go ahead and attend to your own business. (3) Rinse the mouth well with peroxide about twice a week, and brush the teeth once or twice a week with pow dered charcoal. If there Is tartar on your teeth, have a dentist remove it. (4) No. (6) She should never be out after dark unless with her parents or some older person approved by her par ents. _i_ Dear Mrs. Thompson: (1)—I am 20 years old and have been keeping company with a gentleman for several months. He says he loves me better than any girl he ever went with, but I think he loves another girl, as he seems rather Interested In her affairs. I Uke him very much. Please ad vise me what to do. (2)—What Is a good chocolate fudge recipe? (3)—Are Pony coats worn this season? Anxious. (1) —A man doesn’t always love a girl because he Is Interested in her affairs. He probably means what he tells you. But don’t like him too much. Let him ask you to marry him before you decide that he is the only man in the world for you. (2) —Chocolate fudge: Three cups gran ulated sugar, % cup rich milk; bring to boiling point, then add one tablespoon but ter and five tablespoons grated unsweet ened chocolate. Let boll just live minutes, stirring constantly. Then remove from fire, add one tablespoon extract vanilla for almorit). Stir until creamy, pour Into but tered plates to cool. (3)—Yes. Dear Mrs. Thompson—a) I am a girl of 17, engaged to a boy of 21. X have never kissed him but he thinks I ought to. I have always said I would never kiss a man until I was married to him. Please advise me. (2) Do you approve of turkey trotting? (8) There Is nothing wrong in chewing gum In church. Is there? Sapolio. If I were a man engaged to marry a girl I loved, I would surely want her to show her affection for me with a kiss once In a while. If you love him, kiss him —but not too much. (8) There are nicer ways of dancing. (3) It Is not ladylike. A nice girl won't do It. Dear Mrs. Thompson: (1)—Please give me a recipe for warts. (2) —How can I clean a white felt hat? (3) —Is a girl of 17 old enough to have a fellow once in a while?—X. Y. Z. (X)—Apply coal oil on wart twice a day. (2) —Brush hat well, then sponge with ammonia and cold water. Press hat by wringing out a clean cloth from cold water and placing over hat, Iron ing over cloth until dry. Pulling off the cloth will raise the nap of the felt. (3) —Have as many boy friends as you like, my dear, but don't let any of them make love to you until you art old enough to know what Is real love. Dear Mrs. Thompson—I am a girl of 20 and went three months steady with a young man who said he loved me. He gave me a fine time. The girl I used to chum with was jealous and lied to him about me—said I was out with other fellows one Sunday when I was out with her. He told me about It and now my chum goes around with another girl and this girl took my friend away from me. He sent me cards since and called me up once to see If I was mad at him. I told him no. He Is an awful nloa fellow. Please advise me. BROWN EYES. I don't see what you can do, Brown Eyes. If he cared very much for you he would not go with any other girl. You did right to tell him you are not angry, but If I were you, I would get another beau. Dear Mrs. Thompson—Do you think there is any harm for a young man to go Into a saloon to play pool. Don’t you think folks form a bad opinion of him? I have a son aged 22 who takes much pleasure In so doing. What can I do to keep him from It? ANXIOUS MOTHER. Dear mother, It’s difficult to tell you what to do. If I were you and could manage It, I would have a pool table at home and learn how to play with my son and Invite his friends In to play with him. Yes, it harms a young man's good prospects to be seen spend ing much time over a pool table. Try and find some other absorbing Interest for him which would place him In bet ter company. Dear Mrs. Thompson: I am 13 years old and my mother has been dead five years. I am staying with a very nice woman, but papa wants me to come and stay with him. He has not got things convenient and there are always two or three men staying with him. Do you think It would be all right for me to go with him or to stay with the woman two or three years yet? Is my writing good? I am In the seventh grade. Am I well along? SCHOOL OIRL. If your father knows what Is best^ for his little girl he will not ask her to live with him when he has several other men staying with him. Stay with the woman, my dear, until your father can make the right kind of a home for you. Your writing Is fair and you are do ing very well In school. Dear Mrs. Thompson: I am a young man 22 years of age. height six feet one Inch, weight 165 pounds. How much should I we—There is nothing in the world so pretty as a young girl’s healthy, natural complexion. Se don’t spoil It with powder, my dear. (4)—To your shoetops. (6)—Yes. Dear Mr*. Thompson—We have a young man teacher in our seminary who is very Jolly. My chum and I passed the dormi tory one noon eating from the same ap ple. As soon as he saw us he asked In a Joking way for "the next turn.” Was It proper for me to offer it? N. R. Ae you know he was joking you might have laughed and passed on, but it did no harm to offer him a bite. Dear Mrs. Thompson—I am terribly in love with a young man who seems to think a lot of me. He goes to work at 5:30 a. m. Then he goes to work at another place at 6 p. m. and works until 11. He wants me to write and gets mad If I dont’ but he never an swers, as he says he hasn't time, which I know Is true. Should I continue to write to him? CONSTANT READER. If you are not engaged to marry him, why do you need to write to him at all? Let him get mad. He Is rather too busy to be much of a lover, any way, and you certainly wouldn't want a husband who Is at home not quite five hours out of the 24. Dear Mrs. Thompson: We are two young school girls and have come to ask your advice. There Is a boy friend known to one of us live years, to the other over a year. We were Just friends and never paid much attention to him except in a friendly way. All at once he began making love to one of us and when he was with one he would talk of the other. At last we found that he was deceitful. (1)—How can we tell him we want nothing more to do with him? Or should we say anything? (2)—We do not care to continue his friendship and If he tries to get good again what should we say to him? (3)—Should we speak to him on the street? (4)—One of us has his picture. Should we give It back to him? Chums. (1)—Say nothing at all to him, my dears. (2)—Be courteous, but very cool and indifferent. If he asks to be for given, tell him you were certain he did not know at the time how foolish he was and that you will overlook it this once, but never again. (3)—It Is always polite to speak to an acquaint ance, unless he has done something unpardonable. (4)—Probably more than one girl has his picture. I would not acknowledge him of enough Im portance to return it. L Backache Makes Anyone Feel Old Nothing ages anyone more quickly than weak kidneys. It is not alone the aching back, the stiff, painful joints, but the evil effect of bad, poisoned blood on the nerves, the vital organs and the digestion. The condition of the kidneys makes good health or ill-health. j The kidneys are the filters of the blood. \ Active kidneys filter from the blood ev- 1 ery day over one ounce of poisonous waste and pass it off dissolved in the urine. If the kidneys are weak or diseased, only part of this filtering is done and the blood is heavy with uric acid and other poison ous or waste matter. Instead of being nourished by the blood, the nerves and vital organs are ir ritated, and the circulation, digestion, etc., are disturbed. If your back aches constantly, if your joints are stiff, lame and painful, suspect the kidneys. Kidney sufferers are likely to feel dull, heavy, restless at night, rheumatic, dizzy at times, subject to headaches and an noyed with sharp, piercing pains that make work an agony and rest impossible. Doan’s Kidney Pills are the best-recom- / mended and most widely used remedy .for Jj weak or diseased kidneys. They act quick ly; contain no poisonous nor habit-form ing drugs and leave no bad after-affects of any kind—just make you feel-better all over. The following case is typical of the cure* effected by Doan’s Kidney Pills. Grateful testimony ia the best evidence. ' SAVED HIS LIFE. Made Well After Doctors Gave Up Hope. E. D. Wert, Port Aransas, Texas, saysr “The secretions from my kidneys were to® frequent in passage, burned terribly and contained a thick, red brick-dust sediment. My back ached all the time and ther® were pains through my kidneys and side*. I simplv couldn’t straighten after stoop ing. When in bed, I couldn’t even turn on my 6ide. I had awful dizzy and nerv ous spells and my eyes got so bad that I couldn’t use them much. I was confined to my bed for months. Finally, my own doctor called in a specialist for consulta tion. They told me I had but a short time to live. I happened to read of a similar case that had been cured by Doan's Kidney Pills. I sent for this remedy at once and from the time I began using it. I felt better and stronger. In two month* I was able to work every day, and in an other month I was as well as ever. For twelve years I have had no sign of kidney trouble.” •When Your/Back is Lame—Remembei*’the Name" (GAN’S KIDNEY PILLS Sold by OH Dcnlets., Price 50 cents. FasteHiObum Co, Buffalo, N. Y, Proprietors SHORT ON BROTHERLY LOVE Luckily William Had Grace Enough to Remember That Henry Was Sacred. William was not kind to his small brother Henry; in fact, he looked upon him as a nuisance, a scourge sent from heaven to try his spirit and spoil his fun. Especially that day was Henry a thorn in the older boy’s flesh. In his efforts to rid himself of his burden, William resorted to all the methods the mind of youth suggested, but In vain. Henry continued to stick as close. It not closer, than a brother. "William, finally said the boy’s father, who had witnessed, unheard, the final paroxysm of the unequal struggle, “you should be ashamed of yourself to treat your little brother in that way! He ought to be sacred to you.” William made no reply; but short ly afterward, believing himself to be free of surveillance, he was heard to address Henry thus: "Always taggin’ after me! If you weren’t sacred I’d break your blamed face for you!"— The Sunday Magazine. THE BEST TREATMENT FOR ITCHING SCALPS, DANDRUFF AND FALLING HAIR To allay Itching and Irritation of the scalp, prevent dry, thin and falling hair, remove crusts, scales and dan druff, and promote the growth and beauty of the hair, the following spe cial treatment Is most effective, agree able and economical. On retiring, comb the hair out straight all around, then begin at the side and make a parting, gently rubbing Cuticura oint ment Into the parting with a bit of soft flannel held over the end of the finger. Anoint additional partings about half an Inch apart until the whole scalp has been treated, the pur pose being to get the Cuticura Oint ment on the scalp skin rather than on the hair. It is well to place a light covering over the hair to protect the pillow from possible stain. The next morning, shampoo with Cuticura Soap and hot water. Shampoos alone may be used as often as agreeable, but once or twice a month Is generally sufficient for this special treatment for women’s hair. Cuticura Soap and Ointment sold throughout the world. Sample of each free, with 32-p. Skin Book. Address post-card "Cuticura, Dept L, Boston." Adv. _ Rose to the Occasion. "Where did you get those lovely roses, dear?” "Aren’t they beautiful!" “Yes—where did you get them?” "Robert Bosqueau gave them to me.” "Bobbie Bosqueau? Why-” "Yes, I know what you are going to say. His wife has been dead only six weeks, and Isn’t It pathetic that be Is bringing me roses?” "Yes—haven’t they kept well!” And the breeze blew, and the rain drops fell, and It wasn’t for quite a while that the fierce enmity started.— Exchange. Not Ready to Decorate. J. D. Bowersock of Lawrence was explaining to the Kansas editors last week how he feels toward certain edi tors. “I am like the Dutchman," said he. “The Dutchman came to town on Decoration day. He saw the flags flying and the people going to the cemetery with large bunches of flow ers. He asked what it meant. ‘Why, this is Decoration day,' said one. 'Don’t you know what that is?’ The Dutchman confessed that he didn’t. The man then explained it. ‘Isn’t there some one at rest in the ceme tery whose grave you would like to decorate with flowers?’ asked the man. The Dutchman shook his head and replied:, ‘Dose Peebles vat graves I like to degorate are not dead yet.’ ” —Kansas City Star. ALFALFA $6. Timothy and Clover mixed, M-60. Farms for sale and rent on crop pay ments. J. MUL.H AL.L, Sioux City, la. Adv. The easiest thing in the world to do is to make up your mind what you would do if you were in some other fellow’s place. MATERNAL INTUITION. -- — - » Mrs. Pig—Now, Curly, when you're at the party I want you to behave like a perfect hog! Eager for His Rights. As little Freddie had reached the mature age of three, and was about to discard petticoats for manly rai ment in the form of knickerbockers, his mother determined to make the occasion a memorable one. The Bris tol Times tells what happened. The breakfast table was laden with good fare as the newly-breeched infant was led into the room. ‘‘Ah!” cried the proud mother, “now you are a little man!” The fledgling was In ecstacles. Dis playing his garments to their full ad vantage, he edged closer to his moth er, and whispered: "Mummle, can I call pa Bill now?"—Youth’s Compan ion. Adopted Standard Carat. The International carat which has been adopted In this country, to be effective July 1 next, Is 200 milligram, mes, or one-fifth of a gramme (3.086 grains), and Is now In use In France, Germany and practically all countries except the United States, Great Bri tain, Belgium and Holland. Mm. Wlnalow’s Soothing Syrup for Children teething, softens the gums, reduces inflamma tion allays pain, cures wind col ic. 25c a bottle. Mv. Its Materials. “1 am building a lovely castle in Spain.” “What of? Gold bricks?” Pessimism. Willie—Paw, what is a pessimist? Paw—A man who takes an umbrel la along when he goes to a ball game. —Cincinnati Enquirer. " Important to mother* Examine carefully every bottle of CASTORIA, a safe and sure remedy for Infants and children, and see that it Bears the Signature of In Use For Over 30' Years. Children Crj for Fletcher’s Castoria His Status. “That man Is something more than a mere marine.” "Do you mean he Is an ultrama rine?” One-half the women In the world want to get thin; the other half want to get fat. WHEN RUBBERS BECOME! NECESSARY And your shoes pinch. Alien's Foot-Ease, the Antiseptic powder to be shaken into the shoes, is Just the thing to use. Try it for Breaking in New Bboes. Sold Everywhere, 25c. Sample FREE. Address, A. S. Olmsted, LeRoy, N.Y. Don’t accept any substitute. Adv. The man who refuses to see the error of his way has just that much further to travel back. "Health's best way—Eat Apples ev ery day.”—Coyne. Mamma "Its Safe Childrer CONTAINS NO OPIATES - Saskatchewan Your Opportunity is NOW n the Province of Saskatchewan, |Canode J>o you desire to get a h'reo Homestead of 10© ACRES of that well _ jpknown Wheat Land? " ho area 1m becoming more limited but no loss valuable. t NEW DISTRICTS have recently been opened up for soitlcuicni, and Into these rull roads are now being built. The dny will soon come when there will be no , Free Homesteading land left. A 8wiftCurrent. Saskatchewan, farmer writes: came on my homestead, March lPQtf, with about 11,000 wort h of horses and machin ery, and Just 136 in cash. Today 1 have itit) acres of wheat. 800 acres of outs, and 60 acres of flax.” No* bnd for Nix years, but only an In stance of what may bo done la Western Canada In Manitoba, Saskatchewan or Alberto. Send at once for Literature, Maps, Hallway Hates, etc., to J. I. MadaMn. Drmtr 578, WjtatMra, 1 *• V. MNNf 1 f, Bee BulJdin*, 0m.*to. Vbttsl* md R.A.Gerrelt. 315 Jerksoo Si.. St- Paul. Mb a. Canadlun Government Agents,or address Nuperln tomfool. of Immigration, Ottawa, « aa