The Frontier
Pabli.hid by D. U. CRON IS,
KOMAI.VE SAUNDERS. Assistant Editor
and Manager.
|1 50 tb© Year 75 (Jems Six Monthi
Official paper of O’Neill ami Holt county.
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__ I
AS IT APPEARED TO J. J.
A Chapter From McCafferty's History
of Holt County.—Twenty Years of
Local and National History.
Holt county has always taken her
place in the front ranks of the state’s
and nation's reformer. She needed such
services her self, and contributed her
ull quoto of able advocates of the
people’s cause. A four or five years
agitation culminated, back in 1887, in
the passage of the inter-state com
merce law, and a Holt county man, G.
M. Cleveland, was one of the very
early advocates of the law which,
through official connivance, remained
a dead letter law for well neigh 20
years. Our county also contributed
more than her share of defenders of
the double standard of values in 1896,
which had been our nation’s pride and
toast for almost the span of its history
and it was supposed to be the bulwark
of the tollers of saftey, but the money
power wanted it change and hired
able writers and subsidized the
nation’s press with the result that
the masses were made to believe that
the defenders of exisiting law, at that
time, were the innovators and advo
cates of a change in our money sys
tem. The contractiontsts had their
way and won at the ballot box, but a
just Providence robbed them of the
fruits of that victory by opening up
vast treasures of the preferred yellow
metal ana as me law or iree coinage
for that one metal was in full force
it was freely coined into the money of
the realm and plentitied the medium
of exchange and reduced the purching
power of its own coin and facilitated
the paying of debts by advancing the
pric?s of labor and labor products.
The free coinage doctrine of the "re
formers” was only a means to a desired
end and the end sought was to make
money plenty as every political escon
omisth, from Rlcordo to Adam Smith
and I. Donnelly, has taught us that
the quantity of money governs its
quality and purchasing power. In
1896^we had a per capita money medi
um of exchange of less than $21 and
now in 190" it exceeds $33. Then
labor and everything produced by
labor was low priced and in a langu
ishing condition and today labor and
its products are high priced and in a
brisk demand. Holt must have had a
score of able advocats of the double
standard,or blemetalists,among which
number I may mention James P.
Mullen, M. F. Harrington, B. S. Gll
lispie, T. Y. Golden, H. R. Henry, the
two Copies, Hugh O’Neill, D. W.
Uosenkrantz and the writer of this
book who was then busy in his hum
ble way sowing double standard seed.
Whether It proves the theory of
cycles or is merely a chance coincidence
in point of time there appears to be a
remarkable parallel between 1887 and
this year of stress and strenous strife,
190". Then as now, the whole people
ncto up in ni uio auu iu u iuvvu tv iu i vu.
tlgate and reform things, especially
railroads. One of the last acts of con
gress which expired in March' 1887,
was to pass a law creating the inter
state commission which laid the
foundation of federal regulation of
railroads, which was opposed to the
last minute by every railroad man in
the land. While it was under discus
sion the newspapers printed long, im
passioned interviews with railroads
officials, all pretty much of one mind
as to the dire consequense and doubt,
ful hereafter. The burden of their
song was that the law was meddle
some, abnoxions, destructive and con.
tiscatory and could never be enforced—
and if enforced ruin would be sure to
fellow in the after math.
J. J. Hill, the president of the St.
Paul, Minneapolis & Manitoba rail
road, got himself interviewed and
said: “Should the bill become a law
and be enforced there will have to be
an extra session of congress called
within 60 days for the purpose of re
pealing it. The railroads could live
under the bill but the people of the
west would go bankrupt.” And Presi
dent Perkins, of the Chicago, Burling
ton & Qulency road, put up a great
argument against the enactment of
that law, winding up as follows:
“Why then attempt to regulate, by
legislation, the inexorable laws of
trade regarding railroads, when it is
admitted that such an effort in any
other direction would be folly.” Chas.
A. Dana, of the New York Sun, wrote:
“No point is better settled than that
congress has the exclusive right to re
gulate commerce between the states.
It has long exercised the right in re
ference to commerce carried by steam
boats, and it has been certain for the
last 10 yeaisthat sooner or later it
would exercise it on commerce carried
by railroads from one state to
another.'’ Poor Dana is dead and tin
great newspaper he founded and sc
ably (conducted is the property o
Pierpont Morgan and the tool of rail
roads.
The bill passed and the new inter
state commission was appointed anc
if it had been properly enforced il
would have been the bigest “stick’
the people ever had put into theii
hands to defend their rights agalnsl
the encroachments of the predatori
railroads. But, for some reason anc
by some cause, the commission was
put to sleep and it might be said il
went out of business “as soon as il
was born” and slept till the natior
was shocked and had a rude awaken
ing in the robberies of the Pacific rail
roads by Jay Gould and his associates
The nation demanded and got an in
vestigation in the next congress
which provided and spurred the inter
state commisson into action and some
of the more timid ones were embold
ened in their demands by the nation
having an interest in these subsidized
highways. It was first planned tc
merely investigate the roads finance tc
determine if there was not a margin
of profit out of which something
might be paid to the government on
account, but the scope of the proposed
investigation gradually widended in
obedience to popular sentiment, until
at last a commission of three, by act
of congress, was invested with
authority to conduct a more rigid in
quiry, covering freight and passenger
rates, discriminations and relations
of the roads to the welfare of the com
munities.
This committee was appointed by
President Cleveland who named
Robert E. Patterson, E. Ellery Ander
son and David T. Lettler. Clothed
with extraordinary powers to procure
books and witnesses the commission
met at No. 10 Wall street, New York,
and started the “railroad inquisi
tion.” Speculators like Jas. R. Keene
and A. Commack, railroad otticials,
clerks,private secretaries and captains
of finance, having a “holy horror” of
publicity—all were dragged forth from
the lnacessible recesses of Wall street.
Some told frankly what they knew
and otheres were reticent and defiant.
U. f. Huntington, ounaer or o. i.,
frowned in defiance on the committee
as did also Russell Sage. But the
climax came with the testlmoney of
Jay Gould who then held about the
same relation to railroad finance that
Harriman holds today. He had been
foolishly eulogized as well as intern
perately condemend. He was feared
by all, hated by many, admired by
some and loved by a few. He was the
conundrum of the world and the
wizard of Wall street. Under his
magic touch one thing would flourish
and another decay and it was said
that he reaped a rich harvest of profits
both from the living and dead enter
prises. He was on the stand for 3 days
and was a vulnerable and taciturn wit
ness by spells. When questions were put
which seemed likely to lead into de
tails of his financial transactions he
became short in his answers and was
out of memory, but when he was given
an opening to propround theories of
life and government, or to dwell upon
his achievements as a builder, or to
discourse upon railroading as a science,
his answers expanded into voluminous
verbosity; but when cornered about
books which had disappeared or plied
with questions relating to specific
transactions he would be taken with
painful and sudden lapses of memory.
It came out in his testimony that he
and Russell Sage were the trustees of
a mortgage under v> hich, among other
collaterals, a large amount of Denver
Pacific stock was pledged. The stock
was of uncertain value and they desir
ed to have it released from the trust,
and Sidney Dillon brought a friendly
suit against them. Dillon and others
testified that the stock, as it stood,
was practically worthless, but Gould
said it might be worth 10 cents on the
dollar to his system and he got it at
that figure and sold it the following
day at par, or $1. Gould was rather
hazy in his recollections of this tran
saction but finally said:11 We could just
as well have put in Denver Pacific at
*o00,000 as $4,000,000 which we got.”
The government took the Pacific
roads and put them in the hands of a
commission to run and after the lapse
of a few years it sold them to a syn
dicate or trust, but the commission
demonstrated the fact that the roads
could be operated at a big profit even
on their watered stock. Mr. Ilarri
man was on that commission which is
an argument against the claim that
the roads would go to the bad undei
federal and political management as
it is claimed favoritism would hold
sway in place of efficiency.
The railroad question is now up foi
settlement and it tops all other ques
tions in its stupendous proportions
and railroading is still in Us infancy
though it has outgrown the measur
ments and capacity of its present sys
tem and management. This questtor
is such a momentous one that it oc
cupies the minds of every public mar
from Theodore Roosevelt down t(
Frank Phillips, our representitive ir
the state senate who voted for every
anti-railroad measure advocated ir
the Nebraska legislative session o
1907. That session, though over
whelmingly republican, abolished thi
i railways most potent weapon of cor
i ruption, the politico-railway pass, and
' gave the people a batch of good and
wholesome laws, among which was a
two-cent fiat passenger fare; though
it used to be the cry that the railroads
owned the republican party of Nebra
ska, but if they ever did they evident
ly lost their corperate grip on a ma
jority of that party in the legislature
, of 1907.
All parties and every politician has
now some kind ol a prod aimed at the
1 railroad corporations, and any kind
of an anti-railroad cry is sure of a po
pular reception at the hands of the
people irregardless of the matter of
being right or wrong. And Holt
county is in the fore-front of the anti
railway cruasde and has the president
of the public ownership of the rail
roads league living in its county seat.
But it seems that the advocates of
government ownership of the roads
let their opporunity pass when they
allowed, without a protest, the sale of
the Union Pacific and Southern Pacfic
roads. Still they have a nest egg left
and a nucleus round which they may
rally and work In the public ownership
of the Panama railroad. There is one
thing that must be done for the peo
ple’s safety and protection, and it must
be done quickly, and that is that the
water must be squeezed out of the ex
panded railroads tooks,and fixedoharges
of transporation must be based on
actual cost and honest value. If the
people get this measure of protection
they wont care very much whether it
will come through government control
or public ownership. But there is no
good and valid reason why a person
should put a dollar into a railroad
enterprise and bond it for two dollars
or more and compel you and I to pay
charges on the swollen figures, when
we buy transportation, than if we put
a dollar in a bank deposit and asked
the cashier for a certificate for two
and the payment of interest on same.
If you would make such a demand
would’nt the bankers look at you in
wonder and blank astonishment, and
yet this is the very thing that has
been going on since the oldest of us
were boys and we scarcely ever mur
mered a passive dissent.
wui lime is passing auu a cuauge is
coming and we know not how far the
the new breeze will blow or the kind
and nature of the clouds it will gather
in its path but watered stock of rail
roads and other ficticious values of
corporate villainy is doomed, and the
future historian will gaze in awe and
wonder at our patience and criminal
folly in the permission of our sur
rounding epesodes of contemporary ex
ploiting plunder.
Don't Like Game Preserve Idea.
Valentine Republican: An effort is
being made to establish a game pre
serve on the Fort Niobrara militafy
reservation. Knowledge of this move
ment comes through a letter from
George L. Carter, deputy game war
den to Mr. Cornell. This letter was
submitted to the commercial club and
several other citizens for an expression
of opinion, all of whom opposed the
move. People here are practically a
unit in desiring that, if the reserva
tion is not to be used for military pur
poses,it be thrown open to settlement.
In view of this sentiment Mr. Cornell
in replying suggested that the Nio
brara timber reserve be utilized as a
game preserve, setting forth its ad
vantages, which do not exist on the
Fort Niobrara military reservation.
As regards Fort Niobrara, first of all,
the people here desire it to be rebuilt
and garrisoned as a full artillary post.
It Is not likely the government will
permit this tract of land, highly val
uable for military purposes, being
thrown open to settlement, but
people here are anxious that the war
department make use of it soon.
Methodist Church Items.
The “Week of Prayer” is being ob
served at the Methodist church, a
service being held each evening. We
cordially invite all to participate.
Next Sunday morning the pastor
will take for his subject, “The More
Abundant Life.” His evening sub
ject will be, “God's Expectation of
Vineyard.” Everybody welcome.
We are anxious that our friends re
member the Sunday morning class
meeting, held at 10 o’clock. This is
always an interesting and profitable
service and sould be well sustained.
At the annual meeting of our Sun
day school board held on Thursday
evening of last week, the following
otticers were elected for the current
year: Mr. McKeen, superintendent;
Miss Mabel Nash, assistent superin
tendent; Miss EdnaBarnard,secretary;
Mrs. Mary Polk, treasurer; Miss Mary
Howe, treasurer of the missionary
fund; Oren Bowen, librarian; Miss
Edna Howe, organist; Archie Bowen,
assistant organist.
Our Sunday school session follows
the morning service and we should be
pleased if every one would remain for
' the same.
Junior League at 3 o’clock Sunday
afternoon and Epworth League ser
vice at 6:30 p. m. These services are
> open to everybody, especially to the
young people and children.
T. S. Watson, Pastor.
EWING.
Miss Louise Pfund of O’Neill visit
ed with the Misses Hubbard Wednes
day.
Jas. O’Donnell of O’Neill has been
looking after the affairs of the Pioneer
bank this week.
A great amount of sickness still pre
vails in this community. Both of our
doctors are busy night and day.
Supervisors Keyes of Inman and
Golden of O’Neill were looking after
county business here the first of the
week.
Miss Maggie Bauman of Atkinson
and the Misses Margaret Brennan and
Mary Mechaley of O’Neill visited
with the Misses Sanders Tuesday and
Wednesday.—The Advocate.
ATKINSON.
A. O. Perry went to Norfolk Mon
day to close a deal whereby he be
comes owner of the Pacific hotel at
that place.
Henry Martfelt passed through At
kinson, from Emmet, on his way to
Newport to look over the hotel pro
perty he recently purchased.
Mrs. A. O. Perry receivedatelegram
last Thursday, from Council Bluffs,
stating that her sister, Mrs. John
Bates, who has been taking treatment
there in a hospital, was dead. Mrs.
Perry left for Humphrey, Nebr , Fri
day morning, to attend the funeral.
A. G. West, who formerly lived near
Fairmont, West Virginia, where a
recent explosion killed a number of
men who were working in the coal
mines, circulated a subscription paper
amoung our business men, for the
temporary relief of the widows and
orphans, who were left destitute and
with no means of support. He suc
ceeded in raising $33, which amount
will be forwarded to them along with
the names of the doners. The charit
able action of Mr. West is to be com
mended as is also the liberal spirit
shown by our citizens.—The Graphic.
Geo. Page returned to Wayne Mon
day morning, after spending Christ
mas week at home.
Mrs. Dr. Skelton and two children
of Spencer, Neb., are visiting her
parents, Mr. and Mrs. P. E. Chase
and other relatives and friends.
The Misses Louisa and Grace Ken
nedy aie home from the O’Neill nor
mal for two weeks vacation. They
expect to return to school Monday.
Miss Ruth Page left Wednesday for
Lincoln where she will attend the
State Teachers’ association. Miss
Lydia Page has been spending Xmas
vacation with her mother, Mrs. S. A.
Page, she returns to her school at
Naper, Jan. 5.
Harry, the youngest son of Mr. and
Mrs. Wm. Parks met with a sercious
accident, Monday morning. He was
holding the gate open for the horses
to pass out when one kicked him on
the forehead, over the eye, cutting a
gash so the brain oozed out. Dr. Bild
was called and he advised them to
take him to the hospital,and they took
the train for Sioux City Tuesday
morning.
Mr. and Mrs. W. P. Evans of Mead
ow Grove spent the holidays in Page
and vicinity. Mr. Evans has recently
procured patents on an automatic hay
or straw baling press, which expects
have predicted would revolutionize
the hay baling business. The mach
ine is designed to do as much again
work with less labor as any other
machine now in use, and will also at
tach to a threshing machine and bale
the straw as fast as it comes from the
machine without any extra labor.—
The Reporter.
STTT A T?T
Mr. and Mrs. W. M. Drayton, ac
companied by their two daughter--,
Althea and Mary, left this morning
for a three or four months visit to the
Pacific coast. They will go via Kan
sas City, and Austin El Paso, Tex ,
will spend about a month in San
Diego, Cal., will visit San Francisco,
Portland, Ore., Takoma, Spokane and
Seattle, Wash., Billings, Mont., Den
ver, Colo., and home via Omaha
Rev. Light informs us that there
are a number of people in the Cleve.
land ana Dustin neighborhoods who
have contributed money to a fund
being raised to be given to Mr.Yantzi,
who was so badly burned while trying
ingtosave his little girl from burn
ing to death near O’Neill, as reported
in qur last paper. Anyone in or near
Stuart who wishes .to contribute to
this fund may leave the money with
Mr. Light who will give the receipt
for the amount and see that it is duly
forwarded to Mr. Yantzi. It is
thought Mr. Yantzi will lose one or
possibly both of his hands as a result
of the burns. This will indeed be a
terrible affliction to this stricken
family, in addition to the loss of their
little girl.
Our representative, the Hon. S. W.
Green of Ewing, a bachelor of many
summers who has had many royal bat
tles with the little winged archer,
Cupid, has at last fallen a victim and
will soon take unto himself a bride.
In support of the above we quote the
following, clipped from the Valentine
Republican: “Thursday afternoon
occurred a most enjoyable event at
the home of Mrs. W. W. Wells who
announced the engagement of her
daughter, Claudia, to lion. S. W.
Green of Ewing, Neb. The bride
elect was growned in yellow silk mull,
the liowers and decorations harmoniz
ing. The advice given by the mairied
guests, “Howto keep your husband
sweet,” was very interesting to the
young ladies present and caused much
merriment. The refreshments were
very dainty and carried out the color
scheme of yellow and green. The
place cards being especially appropri
ate. About thirty guests were pre
sent.”—The Advocate.
ITEMS FROM ROUTE ONE.
The funeral of John R. Bellar was
largely attended from this vacinity.
Interment being in the Mennonite
cemetery.
We are glad to hear that Mrs. Rich
ard Koch is improving after a serious
illness of three weeks.
Master Irwin Harding has recovered
from a severe attack of pneumonia
and will soon be able to resume his
studies.
John Robertson of Joy shipped in
another car load of corn for his neigh
bors in the hail district.
Mrs. Marguret Ross of Ray will re
ceive about $3,000 from her father’s
estate in New York
The following otlicers will serve
Rock Falls township the coming year:
Chas. Bigler, clerk, W. R. Johnson,
treasurer, Hiram Stearns, justice of
the peace. At the annual meeting
there was $135 on hand after allowing
all indebtedness, with the exception
of some road receipts which were not
presented.
The father of Chris Yantzi is visit
ing in this neighborhood, he was
formerly a resident here for many
years and has many friends and old
acquaintances.
The Pure Food Law.
Secretary Wilson says, “One of the
objects of the law is to inform the
consumer of the presence of certain
harmful drugs in medicines.” The
law requires that the amount of chlo
roform, opium, morphine, and other
habit forming drugs be stated on the
label of each bottle. The manufact
urers of Chamberlain’s Cough Remedy
have always claimed that their rem
edy did not contain any of these drugs
and the truth of this claim is now
fully proven, as no mention of them is
made on the label. This remedy is
not only one of the safest, but one of
the best in use for coughs and colds.
Its value has been proven beyond
question during the many years it has
been in general use. For sale by Gil
ligan & Stout.
Mrs. Hetty Green, America’s rich
est woman, is the owner of consider
able real estate in Boston. This in
cludes a number of houses and stores.
Mrs. Green occasionaly makes a visit
of inspection there to see that things
are kept in good order, and is prone
to express dissatisfaction with the
work of persons whom she employs to
clean and repair her houses. She has
been known to get on her knees and
scrub a dirty Hour to show an efficient
scrubwoman how to do it properly.
She sweeps out littered rooms and
tidies up yards herself, ridigly bosses
carp nters and plumbers, and compels
them to perlorm their work well.
Attired in shabby clothing, she makes
no more presentable appearance than
the poorest woman in her employ.
Don’t Take the Risk.
When you have a bad cougli or cold
do not let it drag along until it be
comes chronic bronchitis or develoDS
into an attack of pneumonia, but give
it the attention it deserves and get
rid of it. Take Chamberlain's Cough
Remedy and you are sure of prompt
relief. From a small beginning the
sale and use of this preparation has
extended to all parts of the United
States and to many foreign countries.
Its many remarkable cures of coughs
and colds have won for it this wide
reputation and extensive use. Sold
by Gilligan & Stout.
In commenting upon the wealth of
John D. Archbold, who is worth $150,
000,000, all made, as lie says, by fifty
years of “hard and honest toil,” the
Topeka Capitol admits that it is a
long time to work, but the compensa
tion of $3,000,000 a year must be en
couraging. __
The immense amount of timber
used for railroad ties is a sharp re
minder of tlie rapid disappearance of
the forests in the United States. The
railroads in 1906 used $50,000,000 yvorth
of timber, equivalent to 600,000 acres
of forest; 100,000.000 ties were used.
Stomach Trouble Cured. ,
If you have any trouble with your
stomach you should take Chamber
lain’s Stomach and Liver Tablets.
Mr. J. P. Klote of Edina, Mo., says:
“I have used a great many different
medicines for stomach trouble, but
find Chamberlain’s Stomach and Liver
Tablets more beneficial than any other
remedy I ever used.” For sale by Gil
ligan & Stout. _
The postmaster general has decided
that the Homeseekers’ Co-Operative
Colonization company of Hot Springs,
Ark., is conducting a land lottery and
has denied it further use of the mails.
NEGLECTED BAYBERRIES.
Time Was When the Crop Was Eager*
ly Harvested.
Tears ago when the first frosts had
eome Connecticut people went out to
pick the bunches of bayberries to make
the pale green wax candles which
when burning gave out the aromatic
smell of the leaves that the pickers
crushed in pulling off.
We no longer pick bayberries for
company candles for the winter time.
Except a few romantic souls who gath
er berries enough to make a candle or
two for old memories, a few faddists
who want to try to make bayberry can
dles by some discovery or other in a
magazine and some stanch old New
Englanders who love to get out in the
pastures on a crisp fall day—these are
all who gather the bayberries now.
Left to themselves, the clumps of
bushes have spread out and in some
cases overrun whole pastures. In some
parts of Connecticut the bushes have
grown very tall.
In Branford, on the coast, there are
almost bayberry trees, as many can be
found growing along the highways ten
feet tall and some even taller. These
bayberries must be wry old. You can
not help wondering how many crops
have been picked off them in years
past.
As early as 1717 the town records
show that the gathering of bayberries
on the highways and common was for
bidden before Sept. 15. A fine of 10 *
shillings for each violation was the
penalty. It appears th{it the wax from
the berries was used in making a
blacking and a salve and that bayberry
wax continued an article of trade in
Branford down to the last fifty years.
Human nature being about the same
one century to another, there was
probably in 1717 a great complaining
of people who picked the berries “be
fore they were half ripe” or "got up
mornings before anybody else had a
chance;” hence the regulation and the
fine.
But what a breathless, hurried bay
berry picking it must have been the
morning of Sept. 15!—Hartford Cou
rant.
V/ays of the Green Moray of Bermuda
and the Devilfish.
When one speaks of dangerous fish
the first that come to mind are the
shark and the octopus. But neither of
these is really formidable to fishermen.
Tlie shark never attacks a boat and the
octopus very rarely.
A much worse creature than either
shark or octopus is the devilfish—a
large ray that is common in the warm
waters of the Atlantic. This fish
grows to a weight of a ton and a half
and, besides formidable teeth, is arm
ed with a horrible barbed and poisoned
spike in the tail. It has often been
known to attack boats.
A fishing party in a launch succeed
ed in harpooniug one of these fish in
the bay known as Aransas Pass, Tex
as. The brute towed them eighteen
miles out to sea and very nearly upset
the launch. It was twenty-five feet
long and weighed 3,000 pounds.
A very nasty customer is the green
moray of Bermuda. This rather re
sembles a conger eel, but is green in
color and savage beyond any fish that
swims. An English marine officer, fish
ing off Bermuda a year or two ago,
hooked a large specimen and began to
pull it in.
His negro boatman, his eyes staring
with fright, begged him wildly to cut
the line. The officer at first refused,
but when he saw the fish turn on itself
and with a crunch of saw edged teeth
bite a large piece out of its own body
he came to the conclusion that it was
not a nice thing to have in a small
boat.
The swordfish is a dangerous crea
ture. Swordfish are caught for the
sake of their oil and flesh, especially
along the Atlantic coast of the United
States. They are harpooned in the
same manner in which whales used to
be killed. Quiet enough until attack
ed, the swordfish then seems to go
raving mad and fights with unmatched
ferocity.—London Answers.
Hindoo First Steps In English.
A native had been caught at Calcut
ta scaling the wall of the premises into
the compound of No. 3, Chowriughi,
dressed in a complete suit of European
clothes. The man had on the previous
evening concealed himself inside a
shop and had employed his time till
morning in fitting himself with a com
plete suit of clothes, including a white
shirt, with studs and links; a red tie,
carefully put on; black socks, a pair of
boots, a watch and chain, handkerchief
and even a pocketknife, with a straw
bat and stick. He even went the
length of writing his name Inside the
hat. On being caught he said he want
ed to learn English and as a prelim
inary step thought it best to dress him
self in sahib’s clothes.—Bombay (India)
Advocate.
The Difficult Handshake.
It is a difficult matter, this of shaking
hands. To start with, it is not always
easy to know . whether to shake hands
or simply bow or even just scatter a
gentle smile around. Books of etiquette
devote pages to the handshake. How
ever, if one decides to do it, then ’twere
well ’twere done quickly. Let the ac
tion be swift and brief—London Globe.
No Recourse.
“John, I think I hear a thief in the
dark closet beneath the stairs.”
“1 don’t doubt it. I have known it
was there for some time.”
“Telephone for the police.”
"\\ hat’s the use. You can't arrest a
gas mete??”—Houston Tost.
The Future.
Teacher—AVhat is the future of “I
love,” Lulu?
Chicago Child—“I divorce.”—Bohe
mian.