Nebraska Newspapers

    i Grieved.
"I'm afraid there Is a great deal of die
honesty In some of these trusts," said
Senator Sorghum, sadly.
"But you have always defended the
trusts!" exclaimed the friend.
“Yes. Of course, you expect a trust to
take advantage of the public. But whan
the men who organize the deal get to tak
ing advantage of one another—that's dis
honest."
WATCH AND CHAIN.
A lady’s gold filled watch with Elgin,
Waltham or Hampden movement. Case
warranted for 20 years. Gold tilled long
guard chain with solid gold slide complete
for $15. In fine plush case for mailing or
express, prepaid, with my personal guar
antee. Will H Beck, The Sioux City
Jeweler. Sioux City, la.
Grounds for His Belief.
Chicago News: Blfkins—Why do you
consider the breaking cf a mirror an
omen of bad luck?
Mlfklns—Because I broke one about a
year ago, that’s why.
Blfkins—And what happened?
Mifkins—It cost me $25 to replace It.
Mrs. Win»low’» fjooTHivo stkttp Tor Children
teething; softens the gums, reduces inflammation, al
\ajra pain, cures wind oolic. 25 centr a bottle.
Hard to Collect.
Judge: "The world owes me a liv
ing,” said the young man.
“I suppose so,” said the old one; ‘but
you are not so fortunate as to be a
preferred creditor.”
Plso’s Cure for Consumptien Is the best
Medicine I have ever found for coughs
Sd colds.—Mrs. Oscar Tripp, Big Reck,
., March 20. 1901. _
The Full Penalty.
Boston Post: Passerby—Well, well!
Have you been getting a licking, little
man?
Little Man—You called de turn, mis
ter. Foist de Jones kid he licked me,
den ma licked me fer fightln'; den wen
pa came home he licked me fer losln’ to
de Jones kid!
CASTOR IA
For Infants and Children.
The Kind You Have Always Bought
Bears the
Signature of J-CiccJuAi
From Liverpool to Yokohama by the
trans-Canada route will be only 9,830
miles. By New York and San Francisco
It is 12,008 miles.
Responded to Hi* Cue.
Philadelphia Public Ledge <: Lawrence
D'Orsay has a reputation for absent
mindedness. That it U deserved was
proved the other day on an elevated train.
The actor was ijdlng down town on his
way to appear In a matinee performance.
As he was gazing abstractedly out of the
window two young women, sitting across
the car, kept up a lively flow of conver
sation.
"And have you heard from Sarah?”
asked one of them.
D'Orsay—recalling In the midst of his
day dream that one of his cues In "The
Earl of Pawtucket” was "And have you
heard from Sarah?" straightened up in his
seat and said:
“Aw, yes. I have a telegram from
Sarah. Sarah's bettah.”
Whereat the other passengers, especially
the two young women, stared at him cu
riously.
Well Remembered.
Valley City, N. Dak., Dec. 14.—Tw*
years ago Mrs. Matilda M. Boucher,
of this place, suffered a great deal with
a dizziness in her head. She was cured
of this by a remedy called Dodd’s Kid
ney Pills, and has not been troubled
since.
Shortly afterward she had a bad
bilious attack and for this she used
Diamond Dinner Pills and was com
pletely cured In a short time.
In January, 1903, she bad an attack
of Sciatica, of which she says:
“I was almost helpless with the Sci
atica, but remembering whnt Dodd’s
Kidney Pills and Diamond Dinner Pills
had done for me before, I commenced
a treatment of these medicines and in
three weeks I was completely restored
to health. I have great faith in these
medicines, for they have been of so
much benefit to me.”
Dodd’s Kidney Pills are very popu
lar In Barnes County, having made a
great many splendid cures of Sciatica,
Rheumatism and Kidney Troubles.
Many families use no other medicine.
Town Topics: Von Blumer—How Is
your new house getting on?
Witherby—First rate. we have the
foundation and I’m In hopes a few
planks will be laid before the men
strike again.
Mother Gray'* Sweet Powder* for
Children.
Successfully used by Mother Gray, nurse
In the Children’s Home in New York, cure
Constipation, Feverishness, Bad Stomach,
Teething Disorders, move and regulate the
Bowels and Destroy Worms. Over 30,000 tes
timonials. At all Druggists, 26c. Sample
FREE. Address A. 8. Olmsted, LeRoy, N. Y.
There Is nearly four times as murt*
gold In the United States treasury as
there is In the Bank of England.
"Miss Whittaker, a prominent club woman™
of Savannah, Ga., tells how she was entirely
cured of ovarian troubles by the use of
Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound*
“Dear Mrs. Pinkh/.mi —I heartily recommend Lydia E. Pinkham’*
Vegetable Compound as a Uterine Tonic and Regulator. I suffered for
four years with irregularities and Uterine troubles. No one but those who
have experienced this dreadful agony can form any idea of the physical and
mental misery those endure who are thus afflicted. Your Vegetable Com
pound cured me within three months. I was fully restored to health and
strength, and now my periods are regular and painless. What a blessing it
ia to be able to obtain such a remedy when so many doctors fail to help you.
Lydia E. Pinkham’s Vegetable Compound is better than any doctor
or medicine I ever had. Very truly yours, Miss Easy Whittaker, 604 3flth St.,
W. Savannah, Ga.'*
No physician In the world has had such a training or such an
•mount of information at hand to assist in the treatment of all
kinds of female ills as Mrs. Pinkham. In her office at Lynn, Mass.,
■be is able to uo more for the ailing women of America than the
family physician. Any woman, therefore, is responsible for her
own trouble who will not take the pains to write to Mrs. Pinkham
for advice. Her address is Lynn, Mass., and her advice is free.
A letter from another woman showing what was
accomplished !n her case by the use of Lydia
E. Pinkham’s Vegetable Compound.
“ Dear Mrs. Pinkham: I am so giateful
to you for the help Lydia E. Pinkham’s
Vegetable Compound has given me that
I deem it but a small return to write you an
expression of my experience.
“ Many years suffering with weakness,
inflammation, and a broken down system,
made me more anxious to die than live, hui
Lydia E. Pinkham’s Vegetable Com
?ound soon restored my lost strength.
aking the medicine only two weeks pro
duced a radical change, and two months re
stored me to perfect health. I am now a
changed woman, and my friends wonder at
a the change, it is so marvellous. Sincerely
yours, Miss Mattie Henry, 420 Green St,
Danville, Va.”
The testimonials which we are constantly publishing from
grateful women prove beyond a doubt the power of Lydia E.Pink
am’s Vegetable Compound to conquer female diseases.
FORFEIT If v* cannot forthwith produce tho original letter* and denatures el
shore testimonial*, which will prove their absolute genolneneu.
__ .... __ LjcUm M, flnkham hied. Co, Igaa, M-TT]
I ANECDOTES I
- FROM
ANYWHERE
It was Mark' Twain's custom to al
ways have his tonsorlal requirements
attended to at an uptown hostelry. On
one occasion Mr. Clemens was dozing
while the skilful hands of the "artist”
trimmed his thick white hair, when the
sharp call of "front” awoke hint, the
noisemaker presenting him with a card.
The diminutive hotel employ was of
more, interest to the great humorist
than was the card. Marks eyes
twinkled and then he looked solemn.
"And who are you?” he Inquired,
gravely.
"A page, sir,” replied the boy.
“A page?” exclaimed Mark, with due
scorn; “a page—humph—why, you
aren't more than a paragraph 1”
* * •
Here is a story told by Harry S. New,
national republican chairman for In
diana.
On one of the railroads that runs
from Indianapolis to Illinois points was
an old section boss who was a democrat
of the ancient school. He took so
much Interest In politics that several
times he came near losing his Job for
neglecting his duties. At the last na
tional election he was greatly exoited.
and when the polls closed he haunted
the telegraph office In the little station
where he was located. The operator
finally, in order to get rid of him, said
'that as far as he had heard what was
'going over the wires the democrats
iwere In the lead.
i “An' how far did yez hear?” asked
ulmmy.
"Well, Aurora. Peoria and Mendota,
n Illinois, have been carried by the
democrats,” replied the operator.
I “Glory be to hlvens!” shouted Jimmy,
{dashing up the track on a keen run.
'“Bryan is ulected. He's carried four
istates—Auroory, Peorry, Mendata, an’
lllllnlze.”
• • ♦
Senator Depew Is something of a phi
losopher, as well as a politician and
{corporation lawyer.
! He said recently that the narrowest
Escape of his life was when he refused,
'some thirty years ago, to advance $10,
000 to help Alexander Graham Bell and
his father-in-law, the late Gardiner
Hubbard, to develop the new "talking
telegraph,” now so commonly known as
the telephone. At that time Mr. Depew
was counsel for Vanderbilt's Harlem
railroad, and Mr. Hubbard was a rail
way Inspector.
"Had I accepted the proposition,”
said Senator Depew, "I would be worth
today about $30,000,000, or my estate
would, for this vast wealth I should
have had no Incentive to healthy work.
1 should have deteriorated and should
probably now be dead and forgotten.
• • • •
When Berlah Wilkins, who is now the
proprietor of the Washington Post, was
In congress from Ohio he was also pres
ident of a national bank.
He was ordered away by his physi
cian for a rest, and went to a village In
Georgia, where he knew nobody and
where nobody knew him, and nobody,
apparently, cared to. He sat around
the hotel for two weeks and then he
decided to go back to Washington.
He found he did not have enough
money to pay his hotel bill and railroad
fare. He did not care to make a check,
so he walked over to the little bank on
the public square and told the aged
banker who he was, saying he desired
to make a draft for $200 on the bank of
which he was president.
”1 don’t know you,” said the banker,
"but you can make the draft, and If the
bank honors It I will give you the
money."
“ Ican’t wait that long,” Wilkins re
plied. "I want the money now.”
"Identify yourself,” said the banker.
Mr. Wilkins showed the banker his
name as president of the Ohio bank In
the Bank directory and produced some
letters.
“That’s all right,” said the banker,
“but I can’t let you have the money on
such an Identification.”
Wilkins argued. The banker was ob
durate. Finally, after half an hour’s
talk, the banker softened and said:
"Let me see the tag on your shirt If
the Initials are right I’ll cash the
draft.” Wilkins opened his waistcoat.
The letters “J. P. B.” loomed red and
distinct on the tag.
He had on one of half a dozen shirts
his shlrtmaker had sold him for cost
because the man for whom they were
made didn’t take them.
Two of the sporting men In Washing
ton at the Bennlngs races were talk
ing about the scheme of government.
"I saw something yesterday I didn't
think they had,” said one.
"What was It?"
"The department of common labor."
"There ain’t no such thing.”
"Bet you fifty."
"You’re on.” /
They went around to the Willard
building on Fourteenth street. The
man who made the statement pointed
' tirumphantly to the gilt letters above
i the main entrance, which read, ”De
; partment of. Commerce and Labor.”
"There,” he said, "read that: ’De
partment of Common Labor.’ ”
The other chap looked at the sign.
"By George!" he exclaimed. "That’s
. a new one on me. I didn’t suppose they
: had anything to do with common labor
In the government”
. He was about to pay the bet when ho
shouted:
"Hold on, here. I win. That ain't
the department of common labor.
You never saw ‘Common’ spelled with
on R.”
• • • •
A certain Judge, living In the upper
part of New York, while trying a case,
listened with pain and displeasure to
the testimony of a colored woman who
was describing how she had whipped
one of her offspring. She enlarged on
the harrowing details until the Judge
stopped her
"Do you mean to tell me that you
were cruel enough to punish your sou
like that?" he demanded.
“Ob co’se I did, yoh honoh," she re
plied.
“How dare you be so brutal?”
The colored woman looked at him In
fine contempt for a moment, then
asked, slowly:
"Look a-heah, Jedge, was yoh eber
de father ob a wuthless mulatter boy?"
The Judge almost fell from the bench.
”Ef yoh ain’t," continued the negress,
“then you don’t know nuffln’ about de
case!"
• • • *
The extent to which the lingo of the
navy is used as slang in the families of
naval officers, particularly among the
women, is Instanced by a little story
now going the rounds in Washington.
The youngest daughter of a prom
inent naval officer was visiting a
friend who had called to congratulate
the eldest daughter, who lately had be
come engaged to a captain in the same
service as her father. The friend, re
marking upon the engagement, sug
gested that the youngest daughter
would miss her big sister. Whereupon
the girl addressed quickly replied:
"Oh, dear, yes! But Just thin*- of It—
l am advanced a number."
ADMIRAL SCHLEY
ENDORSES PE=RU-NA.
Pe=ru-na Drug Co., Columbus, Ohio:
Gentlemen: “l can cheerfully say that Mrs. Schley
has taken Pe~ru*na and l believe with good effect.”
W. S. SCHLEY.—Washington, D. C.
A DMIRAL SCHLEY; one of the foremost
^ notable heroesof the Nineteenth Century.
A name that starts terror in the heart of every
Spaniard. A man of steady nerve, clear head,
undaunted courage and prompt decision.
Approached by a friend recently, his opin
ion was asked as to the efficacy of Peruna, the
national catarrh remedy. Without the slight
est hesitation he gave this remedy his en
dorsement. It appeared on later conversa
tion that Peruna has been used in his family,
where it is a favorite remedy.
Such endorsements serve to indicate the
wonderful hold that Peruna has upon the
minds of the American p'eople. It is out of
the question that so great and famous a man
as Admiral Schley could have any other
reason for giving his endorsement to Peruna
than his positive conviction that the remedy
is all that he says it is.
The fact is that Peruna has overcome all
opposition and has won its way to the heart®
of the people. The natural timidity which
so many people have felt about giving en
dorsements to any remedy is giving way.
Gratitude and a desire to help others ha®
inspired thousands of people to give public
testimonials for Peruna who herett core would
not have consented to such publitiuy.
Never before in the annals of medicine has
it happened that so many men of national
and international reputation have been will
ing to give unqualified and public endorse
ments to a proprietary remedy. No amount
of advertising could have accomplished such
a result. Peruna has won on its own
merits. Peruna cures catarrh of whatever
phase or location in the human body. That
is why it receives so many notable and
unique endorsements.
Address The Peruna Drug M’f’g Co., Co
lumbus, Ohio, for free literature on catarrh.
Ask Your Druggist for free Peruna Almanac tor iyU4.
How the Bishop Wee Cured.
Harper’s Weekly: An amusing new
anecdote, which Bishop Potter tells on
himself, follows: "When one has lived
tor years In America without any spe
cial title In ordinary conversation,"
Bays the bishop, “It Is not easy to be
come accustomed to being hailed as
Viy lord’ whenever any service Is ren
dered. During my varlouB trips to Eu
rope I found it Impossible to go any
where or do anything without being
’lorded’ right and left. At last I was In
a. fair way of becoming spoiled, when
a. little occurrence mercifully delivered
me. I had reached home, after a run
abroad, nnd while descending the
gangplank met a friend, an old vestry
man of mine. He was hurrying on
board to receive his wife and daugh
ters. Pausing midway up the plank,
he grasped my hand and shouted:
‘“Why, hello, Blsh! How are you?’”
now’s Thiel
We offer One Hundred Dollars Reward "for
any case of Catarrh that cannot be cured by
Hall’s Catarrh Cure.
F. J. CHENEY & CO., Props., Toledo. O.
We the undersigned have known F. J. Cheney
for the last 15 years, and believe him perfectly
honorable In all business transactions and flnau
claily able to carry out any obligation made by
their firm.
West & Truax. Wholesale Druggists, Toledo, O.
Wai.dino. Kinnan & Marvin, Wholesale
Druggists, Toledo. O.
Hall’s Catarrh Cure Is taken Internally, acting
directly upon the blood and raucous surfaces of
lhe system. Price 75c. per bottle. Bold by all
druggists. Testimonials free.
Hall’s Family Pills are the best.
Speak English.
Brander Matthews: Is cherub an Eng
lish word? If so, Its plural Is cherubs,
and not the Hebrew cherubim. Is lexicon
an English word, and criterion also? If
so, their plurals are lexicons and crlte
rlons, not the Greek lexica and crlt^ia.
Is appendix an English word, and Index
and vortex? If so, the plurals are ap
pendixes and Indexes and vortexes, and
not the Greek appendices, Indices nnd
vortices. Is memorandum an English
word, and curriculum, gymnasium, me
dium and sanatorium? If so, their plu
rals are memorandums, and currlculums,
gymnasiums, mediums and sanatorlums,
and not the Latin memoranda, curricula,
gymnasia, media and sanatoria. Is
formula an English word, and nebula
also? If so, the plural Is formulas and
nebulas, and not the Latin formulae and
nebulae. Is beau an English word, and
bureau? If so, the plural Is beaus and
bureaus, and not the French beaux and
bureaux. Is libretto an English word?
If so, Its plural Is librettos, and not the
Italian libretti. Why not speak English?
Scientifio Training in America.
From the Electrical World and En
gineer: In a very Interesting lecture
delivered In London recently on Lord
Bacon, Mr. Sidney Lee expressed doubt
whether a temple of science, such aa
Bacon Imagined In “The New Atlantis,”
would ever come Into existence. At
present the portents were, Mr. Lee
feared, not favorable for Its emergence
In England. It seemed more likely to
come first to birth In Germany or In
America, where thlnga of the mind re
ceived from the general public a con
sideration which was denied them In
England. The experience of a recent
visit to America had shown Mr. Lee
that there was nothing In his own land
to compare with the widespread eager
ness among the youth of * ue United
States to enjoy academic scientific
training. It was difficult for them at
home, too, to realize even dimly the
munificent readiness with which Ameri
can legislatures responded to demands
made on their resources to supply the
American people with fit endownment
and equipment of research.
A Primitive People.
From Andre Sagllo's "The Blgoud
ines” In the December Century: If It
Is hard to know anything about the
surface life of the Blgoudines, It Is
still more difficult to penetrate their
thought; to know whether their brains
are agitated by anything but the sim
ple Ideas of the very primitive peo
ples, the naive reveries of children, or
whether they have preserved some
vague traditions of the upheavals of
humanity which have ended by cast
ing them upon this extreme point of
land. They speak a language which
has no affiliation with any ordinary
tongue. It Is Breton, but a Breton full
of unknown words and strange Idioms,
as yet unstudied by any philologist. As
to the Ffench language, they Ignore It,
Intentionally Ignore It.
The new Belgian military system, es
tablished on the basis of voluntary
conscription, has already proved a
failure. Notwithstanding the active
efforts of the enlistment committee but
few volunteers have come forward dur
ing the last year.
In America alone 30,000 automobiles
will be placed on the market during the
present year, which will only supply
half the demand.
Mother and Child.
Mother and Child! There la no holler
In all the realms of morning and of night;
And all the meaning of that word, Divine,
Shines In the tender glory of this nlgu.
The world learns Worship here; It kneels
In awe,
Seeing a mystery, knowing a mighty law.
Sin cannot live In presence of this grace,
No least unworthiness perplex the place.
Here Good doth dwell, but never baneful
Doubt,
For Love and Loveliness would cast It
out.
Were phophet voices still, the heavens
brass,
Here would new Evangel come to pass;
Out from the dark a roes leaf hand would
leap,
Close to the Eternal Throne the ariclent
world to keep.
—December Century.
Any one can dye with PUTNAM
FADELESS DYE, no experience re- ,
qulred.
The Canadian plan of preferential !
tariffs In favor of Great Britain and
the British colonies Is now being adopt- i
ed In the‘British colonies of South Af
rica.
50,000 AMERICANS
Were Welcomed to
Western
Canada
during last Year
They are settled and nettling on tfea
Grain and Gl aring Land*, and are pro*
peroue and satisfied.
Sir Wilfred Leurler recently said. "A
new star has risen upon the horiseSL
and Is toward It that every immigrant
who leaves the land of his ancestors hi
corns andAeek a horns for hlrnsslf aetT
turns his gaxe"—Cnnadn. There fte
ROOM FOR MILLIONS
FRXI1] Heneeteada given
sway. Mchpola, (knrchea, Bath
For a descriptive Atlas and other In
formation, apply to StirKRIATaMDBMTU*
migration, Ottawa, Canadai or authe*
rised Canadian Government Agent**
E. T. Holme*, 818 Jackson Bt, Bt. Fan I, M<nn.i W, K*
ftogere. Box 116. Watertown. Booth l>akotaj W, Y. Ben*
Jett. ttil New York LI/* Building, Olnuhg, Nob.
pF“8io«x Oity and Rloux City Indpt Lists
i'.v*.-. > Mraa.
jjSale Ten Million Boxes a Year. M
Hi fc BEST FOR THE BOWELS .J
"Sit” and "Set."
New York Press: I,et us once arid for
all settle the "sit” ami "set” question.
Contrary to tradition, the hen does not
“set." The hen -'sits." If you hare a
hen that has laid a dozen eggs am* wants
to hatch a brood of chicks, you may “set"
her. There are no fewer than elghty-one
different meanings of the word "et,"
while of “sit" there are but twenty-one.
The prophet Jeremiah gays, "The par
tridge sltteth on eggs." To sit as applied
to men and animals Is to “crouch;" hence
the hen crouches on her nest, or slta on It.
Change the school books, which are full
of Buck solecisms as “The hen sets; does
the hen set? The hen does set.”
Ripans Tabnles an the best
dys;>cpsia medicine ever made.
A hundred millions of them have
been told lu the United states Io
a single year. Constipation,
heartburn, slok headache, dizzl
ness, bad breath, sore throat and
•very other Illness arising from a disordered
stomach are relieved or cured by Ripans Tabules.
One will generally give relief within twenty
minutes. The nve-cent package Is enough
for ordinary occasions. All druggists tell them.
Wear better, look dressier and
M hold their shape longer than any
other shoes you can buy.
Ask for Mayer Shoes and
look for the trade-mark on
■SKLf. MAYER BOOT 8 SHOE GO.
Ill Milwaukee, Wls.
SIOUX CITY P’T’G CO., 1012—51, 1903
KSThompson’s Eyewater
A Skin of Beauty rs a Joy Forever;
nu. T. mix GOURAEB'8 QKIFNTAX
CREAM, OR MAGICAL BEAUTJLFIEK.
Fomowi Tan, Pimple*, Freak le*
Moth Patches, hash. and ildft
, and every blemish oa
beauty, and Heflea
I demotion. It hag
I stood the test of M
years, and Is se
harmless we tasted
to be sure it Is pre»
erly made. AcoeM
no counterfeit of
similar name. Dr. Z*
A. Sayre said to •
lady of the haut-tos*
(a i atlent): “As ymt
ladies will use the:r\
I recommend Htouxl
aud’s Cream’ ae *b »
least harmful of all
the Skin preiirv
tlon8.“ For sale iij
all Druggists t'ofl
Fanny-Goods Dealers in the U. •., Canadas ana Borers
rSllU. T. HOPKINS, PruB’r. 17 OrMt Jons* Si. N.T.
Capsicum line
Put Up in Collapsible T bes.
j A Substitute for and Superior to Mrn»:>rd or an
other plaster. and will not blister the i. delicate
skin. The paimalluyingand curative qu>:i a of this
i article are wonderful. It will sto the tc —'ache at
I once, ami relieve headache and sciatica.
We recommend it as the best Mud suh external
counter-irritant known, also ns uu external ’ued> Tot
■ pains in the chest and stomach unu ail ....uoiuUO,
I neuralgic and gouty complaints. ....
i A trial will prove what we claim for it, ana it will 54
found to be invaluable in the household. Mt*ny people
I eay "It is the best of all your preparations."
Price 15 cents, at all druggists, or other dealers, or bf
! sending this amount to us in postage stamp**, we will
| tend you a tube by mail. „ . ,. .
No article should be accepted bar the public unices the
1 tame carries our label, ae otherwise it is not genuine,
iCHESEBROUGH MANUFACTURING CO
17 State Street, New York City.
BEGGS’ CHERRY COUGH
SYRUP cures coughs and colds.
I He CURES WHERE Ail ELSE fAiIi.
U Best Cough byrup. Tastes Good. L
llrl In time. Hold by druggists.