THEY COOKED THE RAIN. All With U|ktiih| and Know Mad* a Satisfactory M*aL '•Perhaps one of the roost peculiarly prepared luncheons ever laid before hungry people was one which we had not long ago, when we were snowed up In a theater of a small Western town," said a theatrical man. “Upon this night, within the brief interval after the people left tho theater, while we were dressing to go to our hotel, a terrific snowstorm—such ns you can find only in the West—came up The snow drifted against our doors and all about the streets, so that we had to remain all night In the theater. Of course, we got hungry/ as actors will sometimes do, andjce began to search for something-eat able. / “We prowled around tho property room, and we were about to give up In disgust when one of tho company struck a box of bonns, which were used to imitate the sound of rain. By shaking the box a stage rain storm could be produced. We took this 'rain' as the profession is pleased to call it, but saw no way of cooking it Home one suggested that tho •thunder’ might be a good thing to cook it upon.in lieu of nothing better. The'thundor’was a sheet of tin or iron, which was shaken to make the roar of heaven's artillery. We bent the 'thunder* so that it would hold the beans, but were at a loss for moans for producing heat. Our property .... man suggested that we use ‘light ning,’ a powder of lycopodium, used for making flashes upon the stage, for the fire. We found quite a lot of this, and with the addition of some ‘snow’—little bits of paper used to represent the beautiful—we started quite a fire and succeeded in cooking the beans, which wo ate with a relish. Resolving into stage parlance, we used ‘thunder,’ 'lightning,' and ‘snow’ to cook a lunch that consisted of ■ruin’ >• A LUXURY. II Wu trail That HU Wlfa Didn’t Know the Secret. Ono evening about 6 o'clock in Mis souri, when tbe festive train robber was not so rare as he is now, a dust covered traveler rode up to a cabin on the bank of a small stream and ac costed the man of the place, who was out In front chopping firewood to get supper with. “Can I get something to eat here?” asked the traveler. “You can’t git much, stranger; but you can git what the rest uv us gits,” was the hospitable reply. “Can't I get it quick?” “Soon’s the old woman cooks it; she's at it now, and she sent me out here fer more stove wood.” "I’m very much obliged to you,” said the traveler, “but before coming in I want to tell you that 1 am a fugi tive and there is a reward of 91,000 on my head.” The prospective host took a look at the visitor's head. “It's more'n I'd give,” he Baid quietly. The traveler laughed. “It mightn’t be if you knew who I was,” he said. “One of them train gents, I reckon,'' replied the man at the woodpile as serenely as if he eutertained such angels as a business. “You’ve guessed it." “I wusn’t guessing, stranger; I knowed. But git down and come in and take a wash. I’ll take care uv your hoss. Don’t say nuthln' to the old woman, though, 'bout who y'air, fer ef she knowed I wus indulgin' in this sort uv a thousand-dollar lugshury thar’s no tell in’ what ud happen; she’s so almighty pertickler ■ 'bout some things.” Why He Didn’t Kin Her. The prosecuting attorney in the breach of promise case thought he would make life a burden to the un i fortunate young man who was the . unwilling defendant. “Do you mean l to say,” he asked after a lot of embar rassing questions, “you did not kiss the plaintiff, to whom you were en gaged to be married, when you first aaw her on your return?” “I do,” re aponded the defendant firmly. “Will you make the statement to the jury?" “Certainly, if necessary.” “Do you think they would believe you?” "One , of them would, I know.” “Ah, indeed. And why he, pray?” Because he was present when I first saw her. He was at the gate when I rode up, and she stuck her head out of the second story window and I told her ‘how d’ye,’ and said I’d be back to supper in half an 4| hour. I’m no giraffe,’’ and everybody in the court room smiled exce pt the • • attorney. \ Genlai ua Physical Beauty. \Outd* proceeds to show that men oi if': are fine, handsome fellows. ^Wsre, as a rule: witness Tenny aon, Musset, Scott—the strongest man of \he Rough Clan—Marlbor ough, Goetftu-Uonny Dundee, Burns, Longfellow, SVHenry Taylor, Napo leon, Shelley, Myron—a gallery of - beauties. The Pontes and Voltaires are the exceptions.\Now, if Genius M gets money, renown, the affection of g the sex which Ouida adorns, victory, : i Points, pieaus, and is besides a tall, strong, handsome person, surely Genius has a happy time\nd may disregard the misconception^ pf the * stupid. \ * Th« Sho« Drawer* ’ ^ A shoe drawer, divided into com f ‘ partments so that each pair of shoes 'may always be found together with out delay is a convenience appreciated by a busy woman who has not time to ; be disorderly. A top bureau drawer is also more convenient and easily fi kept in order if partitioned off into compartments of varying sixes to hold laces, ribbons, veils, etc., than it is when filled with pasteboard boxes holding tbs commodities. HIS VISIT CUT 8HORT. An Indianapolis I-mly's Oollcltndn tar thn (.leanltnsM of II*» Krlcnds, A certain lady of Indianapolis who hod never been used to the luxury of life until after her husband, made a large sum of money in t he real estate business, moved into an elegant house which had. amoung other con veniences, a fine bath room,It was her pride, and every visitor was informed about the hath room, (iuests wiio came from a distance were greeted with:/“Now, I know yon are tired and/dusty after your long journey; just go right up to the bath room and you can have a refreshing bath at once.” Tids worked well in most cases, but one day she made a mis take. She went to the door one warm summer afternoon to find a young gentleman friend of her hus band’s from Louisville, and she took it for granted that ho was going to stay all night. So her first words aftc shaking hands with him were: “Now, you are tired and dusty after your journey; just go right up to the bath room; a bath will refreshyon so. ” in vain the young man tried to ex postulate; she had him by the arm and started him up the stairway be fore ho could get in a word. In half an hour he came down nnd took up his hat and stick. “I thank you very much," he said; "I enjoyed the bath very much.” Then he started for the door. “Why, where are you going?” asked the hostess. “To catch my train,” ho answered; “I only had forty minutes to stay and my bath took half an hour, so I must hurry to catch the Chicago train.” It cured the lady of showing off her bath room. FOLLOWING FRIENDLY ADVICE. <9ot a Snap on the llioyole, Bat the Dealer Dhl Not Mourn. "Wouldn’t it bo a good idoa,” said the disintorestod friend, “to put a high grade bicycle in your window and mark it 850 or some sifch price? You’d lose some money on it, of course, but look at the advertising you would get out’of it. Everybody in town would be talking about it inside of twenty-four hours, and your store would get a reputation for selling good machines cheap that would be worth hundreds of dollars to you.” "That's not a bad scheme,” said the bicycle dealer, after thinking.it over, “John,” he called out to one of the boys, “put that Greased Racer in the front window and mark it 830” "Rut—” "Never mind arguing the matter. 1 know what I’m doing.” The Greased Lightning Racer was placed conspicuously in the show win dow with the 830 tag appended. "Now," said the disinterested friend, “that looks something like it. You’ll see a crowd gathering there inside of five minutes, lty the way, you may just consider that machine sold. I’ll take it off your hands. But I’m no hog,” he added, cheerfully. “I’ll let it stay in your window till to-morrow morning." "Wasn’t that rather an unhand some trick?” asked the silent partner, after the disinterested friend had gone away. "No,” reflected the dealer. “That machine has been on hand two years, but it’s worth every cent of 847.50.” SHE WANTED THAT NAIL. Believing It Besponslble for Tears and Swears She Was After It. This is a woman’s age, and a busi ness man who knows says there is positively nothing she will not under take. lie was lounging in his office the other day when a well-dressed, comely little woman appeared. She wore a resolute expression in addition to other apparel and in her hand she carried a large tack-raiser. "Good morning," she said, winning ly. "Is this Mr. Cash’s office? Will you please tell me which chair it is that has that nail in it?” The business man was confused— the nice little woman was a total Btranger to him. lie answered mildly: "What chair? What nail?” "Why," she exclaimed, "my hus band has come home three times re cently with dreadful holes in his coat and trousers, and he said he tore them on a chair in your office. I’m about tired darning and patching those rents and thought it would be more sensible and satisfactory to come down here, pull the nail out and be done with it Don’t you think so?” Still in a trance the merchant agreed with her, found the offending chair, extracted the nail and with many thanks and smiles the enter prising little woman withdrew. Mackerel Wearing a Rubber Band. A mackerel with a rubber band—a sort of primitive corset—around its body has caused much comment at Gloucester, Mass. The band had evi dently been put on him when he wa s small, and had stayed there in spite of its rapid growth. Under the band the fish’s body had not grown, and the depression was about three inches deep. The band was sound and flexi ble, and the fish was in a healthy con dition. Matrimony Cheap In Australia. Those to whom the wedding fee is an obstacle to matrimony should emi grate to Melbourne. Australia, where clergymen vie with each other in their advertisements to tie the knot cheaply. Their charges range from 82.50 to seventy-five cents, and in some cases the wedding breakfast and ! ring are included. ] A Devoted Grandmother. In Charleston, Mass., there resides a widow with one hand. The other is wholly useless because of an acci dent The widow does washing and other day work, is well along in years, but has thus far fed, clothed chlly abstinence from tobacco. Wednesday lie changed liis dining place down town from a twenty-five cent place to a tifty-cent table d’hote, feeling justi fied In spending the extra quarter saved on cigars. Apparently forgetting this Thurs day, the reformer remarked to him self: "There's that new umbrella my wife’s been talking about. I'll buy that and charge it up to two weeks’ savings on smoke.” Friday a new dinner set was purchased to please the wife of his heart, and set over against twenty weeks’ savings from tobacco and Saturday Xerxes Jones spent 25 cents for cigars, hav ing lost six days of his luxury, and figured up that he had saved on the wrong side of his books just about $38.90. LITTLE SKULL OF GLASS. A lto'ton Mail’d Ingenious Device for Pre venting Poisoning Accidents. Tho unlubeled poison bottle is as bad as the unloaded gun for causing fatalities. Carelessness at home will render useless tho utmost vigilance of the drug clerk who relies upon the warning label required by law to bo pasted on all poisonous prescrip tions. To obviate this danger a man living in the suburb of Boston known as Jamaica Plains has made a bottle which very effectually conveys the necessary information as to tho dead ly nature of its contents, so that not only he who runs may read but he who cannot read may understand. The bottle is of blue glass, in order that the contents may better resist being affected by light, and it is molded into the shape of a skull, with cross-benes underneath. The word “poison” is placed in raised letters on the forehead, and at the base of the skull a snace has been left for the red label that tells the nature of tho drug. The hollow eyesockets, tho jawbones and tho teeth would tell its purpose to a blind man, and ghastly as it may seem to those who are blessed with sight, it is better to be frightened than to die. That at least is the philosophy of the inventor, and ho is not a druggist, or doctor, by the way, but a plain, every day jobber in boots and shoes. ENGLISH ORTHOEPY. The Work That Is Being Done by a I>rl v&te Tutor of Foreigner.*. In the national capital is a private tutor of English to foreigners who trains them in the idioms of pronun ciation with this chain of similarly spelled words: “Though the tough cough and hiccough plough me through.” The result is humorous as theso samples of the efforts of the pupils will show: “Tho the to co and hicco plo me thro. Thuf the tuf cuf and hiccuf pluf me thru! lhof the tof cof and hiccof plof me throf. Thup the tup cup and hiccup plup me tlirup. Thoo the too coo and hiccoo ploo me throo.” It is not surprising that Voltaire, when he began to study English and learned that ague was pronounced as two syllables and plague as one, should have wished that half of tho English had the one disease and the other half the other. liurnlng Mountain or Coal. At Winger, in New South Wales, there is a burning mountain.' It is 1.820 feet in height, and is supposed to be a large coal seam which has in some unaccountable way become ignited, and has been burning for many years, certainly long before tno advent of the white man in this por tion of the colony. The course of the fire can be traced a considerable dis tance by the numerous depressions or chasms occasioned by the falling in of the ground from beneath which the coal has been consumed. Sraolte is continually issuing from the sides of the mountain, and in the vicinity of these openings the surface is hot, and has a dry, parched appearance, while sticks thrust into these openings are readily ignited. Rather a Knowing' Cat. J. W. Moses, of Megquier Hill, has an unusuallj intelligent cat, called Isaac, who is very fond of fresh fish. Recently while the eat was lying on the floor a member of the family said to it: “Isaac, do you want us to go a-fishing?”aml then added, “If we had a frog for a bait we would go.” On this old Isaac got up with a knowing look and trotted out, only to return in a few moments with a good-sized frog, which he had caught in a swale near by. Never Touched Him. A little fellow had been seriously lectured by his mother and finallV sent into the garden to find a switch with which he was to be punished. He returned soon and said: “I could not find a switch, mamma, but here’s a stone you can throw at me.” ! SCENES AT WATERLOO. Incident! of the Famous Betti! Slioiv Inc Bravery and Charity. At the battle of Waterloo a Scotch color sergeant, who had been mortally wounded, fell into a ditch, and on3 of his comrades, missing the flag, went straight to the ditch where he h id seen the Highlander fall. Meantime the enemy were charging vigorously. His comrade tried to disengage the flag from the hands of the wounded Highlander, but as he could not sue j ceed he hoisted the wounded man on ; his shoulder, thus carrying both ser geant and flag. The enemy,who were charging, seeing this good deed, stoppedi suddenly; crying “Bravo! [bravo, l’Ecossais!” They did not charge again till the brave man had rejoined his company. □ During the retreat which followed this battle two companies of field ar tillery stopped under orders near l.oissons, at a village a little distauue trora the mam road. The mayor tv as sent for to make the customary dis tribution of food, etc., which was requisitioned, that it might bo done without confusion. It seemed only a moment before all the bread was col lected, each inhabitaut willingly giv ing his own part, and the mayor or dered that lots should be drawn who should give a cow to furnish meat for the soldiers. The lot fell on a poor, old, infirm woman, who with some difficulty dragged herself forward, leaning on her stick, to speak to the mayor. “This cow,” she said, “which you wish to take from mo is all I have; she is both my means of living and my companion, and if you kill her there is nothing left for me but to die, too." The mayor was inflexible, and the ax was raised to kill, the cow when the artillery men cried with one voice, “What does it signify? We will fancy this is Friday and fast most willingly.” They returned the cow to the old woman, and she led it away with tears of joy and gratitude. A MILLIONAIRE'S CHECK. Written on a Piece of Board About Eighteen Inches Square. They wore talking about queer '.liecks, drafts, etc., in the bank, and x gentleman from Kansas City, Mo., finally told the following: “I was once employed,” he said, “to collect a balance of $470 which was due a well-known building firm of Ivansss City from’ an eccentric old •nillionai.'e. How he made his money [don’t kno v, for it is said he could leither read nor write, but ho had it ill the same. “Well, I found the old boy down in his cellar, and was gratified to hear him say that he could pay the bill at ence. ‘I haven’t that much cash with me,’ he said, “but just wait a minute.’ “He felt around as if looking for a piece of paper, and I was just about to offer him some, when his eyes lit in a piece of board about eighteen nelies square. “ ‘Just the thing,’ he said, and with that he picked it up and made a lot of queer-looking marks on it. “ ‘There,* he said, ‘take that to mv bankers and it’ll be all right.’ “I protested, but he insisted, qnd dnally I did as he said. I handed the oiece of plank, dubiously e’nough I tell you, to the paying teller, but what was my relief when he merely smiled, studied the hieroglyphics a moment, and handed me $470. Then te laid the board up on a shelf, and that was all there was to it. “It transpired that the old man had * system of signs all his own, which bis bankers had agreed to respect. 411 the same the plank check seemed rurious even to them, and it is hang ng up in the office of their establish ment now.” The Englishman In America. An Englishman, just over, was breakfasting in New York with an American friend when he stated that ae would run out and see his brother Harry who lived in San Francisco. “Will you be back for dinner?” asked the American quizzically. “Of course,” answered the Englishman, “if not for lunch.” The American ac sompanied him to the station and the Englishman asked for a return ticket to San Francisco with a “stop over” it Chicago, and asked the ticket igent “How much?” “One hundred ind thirty-eight dollars and a half” was the reply. “What?” gasped the Englishman. “How far is it?” “Three thousand miles,” was the reply. The American, friend stood behind the Englishman to catch him when he fell as he exclaimed, “Great 3od, what a country!" Thf I-ovely Agrippina. The younger Agrippina, the daugh ter ot the widow of Uermanicus, was » widow of entirely different species from her mother. When a young girl she married a Russian gentlemen, who soon after died under suspicious cir cumstances. She next captured a •ich old patrician, who also died soon ifter the union. She then fascinated ler uncle, the Emperor Claudius, and jersuaded him to marry her. She is believed to have liad a hand in his leath, as also in that of several per sons who opposed the accession of her son Nero to the imperial throne. Af ter innumerable crimes she was final ly put to death by command of her equally infamous son. In Colombia there grows a plant whose popular name is the ink plant. Its juice is a ready made ink. At first the writing looks reddish, but it be comes deep black in the course of a few hours. It will not harm steel sens; and letters written with it, if soaked in water, even for a long tjme, will be quite legible when dry. The slants are poisonous, however, so that shis natural ink will never take the blace of the common or finger staining ort in daily use* i 'III© Ink i’lant. Bssolntlons, Whbrtas, George E. Hanson, o Leonie, Holt county,' Nebraska, did 01 the evening of July.31, 1894, in public call the United States flag an old rag and likened it to the deyil, and wherea tbe said George E. Hansen did at tb same time and place ridicule and revil tbe memorial services held at tbe cemc tery on the 80th day of last May, de daring it to be nothing but but idolatry and a perfect farce and held the mcmor of our noble dead up ns something ti make sport of, and to ridicule, he alsc delared those participating in memoria exercises to be nlol worshippers, and Whereas, The said George E. Han sen has lived in this community for thi past fourteen years and during tha time he has opposed everything of i good or holy nature in every way thai an evil imagination could conceive of Now be it Resolved, By Gen. Colburn Post No 357 of the Grand Army of the Republic that we most solemnly declare that thi limit of endurance has been reached and that we, a justly indignant people,rise uj in' righteous indignation against thii moral leper and that we denounce hino as a traitor and pledge ourselves from this time on to ostracize him entirely, and we call upon all loyal citizens to do the same and help us to educate thit rebel that there is a certain amount ol respect due the American flag from him And be it further Resolved, That we spread these reso lutions on our records and that we fur nish each paper in the county with i copy for publication. And we request each paper to furnish a copy of their paper to George H. Han, sen at Leonie. David Moler, Commander of Post. There’s Always a Season. It is an easy thing to account for thi wonderful growth of the Daily Statt Journal recently. Its price has beer reduced to 50 cents per month withoul Sunday or 65 cents with Sunday. The Journal has always been reliable and honest, printing the news without feai or favor. The people of Nebraska realize that they need a paper published at the capital, and when the price of the Jour nal was reduced the subscription list grew at a phenomenal rate. The Jour nal is a Nebraska paper through and through. Teaehers’ Institute. The Holt county teachers’ institute will be held at O’Neill, Neb., commenc ing August 20 and continuing two weeks; this being the time selected by the state superintendent. Instructors; Pres. H. K. Warren, of Gates College; Prof. A. R. Wightman Ph. D., of Ewing: Prof. J. A. Pease. Stuart; nnd W. R. Jackson. Lectures will be given by Pres. Warren, Stale Supt. Goudy, Prof. Louis Favour, and Prof. W. A. Clark. The schools of this county will be closed during the session of theinstitute and all those intending to teach in Hint county during the year are expected to attend. Institute fee,»S0 cents. W. R. Jackson, County Superintendent. Attention Ladies. We have just received a large invoice of that celebrated buttermilk toilet soap. It is the finest .complexion man ufactured. The fair sex went wild oyer it in the east last season. Try a box. Only 25 cents. ^'2 O’Neill Grocery Co. In answer to an inquiry the Omaha Bee gives the following list of salaries paid labor leaders: President Debs, of the American Railway union receives a salary of $3,000 per year. General Master Workman Soverigu, of the Knights ot Labor, $5,000 per year. Messrs. Martin, McGuire and other members of the general executive board, $1,000 each. Walking delegates receive the; scale of the trade to which they belong and are paid weekly. Traveling expenses, when allowed, are not in cluded in salaries. Last June Dick Crawford brought bis twelve-months-old child suffering from infantile diarrhoea, to me. It had been weaned at four months old and had al ways been sickly. I gave it the usual in such cases but without benefit. The child kept growing tlunner untill it weighed but little more than it did when born, or perhaps ten pounds. I then started the father to giving Chamber lain’s Colic Cholera and Diarrhoea Remedy. Before one bottle of the 25 cent size had been used a marked* im provement was seen and its continued use cured the child. Its weakness 'and puny constitution disappeared and its father and myself believe the child’s life was saved by this Remedy. J. T. Marlow, M, D., Tamaroa, 111. For sale by P. C. Corrigan Druggist. LEGAL ADVERTISEMENTS. NOTICE FOR PUBLICATION. Land Office at O’Neill. Neb. July 31.18114. Notice Is hereby Riven that tlie following named settler has filed notice of his intention to make Anal proof In support of his claim. ne mar and that said proor will he made before the register and receiver at O’Neill Neb., on September 8.1894. viz: JOHN L. KUHNS, HE No. 14357 forthe SWH Sec. 25, Twp. 31, K. 13 west Oth He names the following witnesses to prove his continuous residence upon and cultiva tion of said land, viz: William Veal, Wallace Johnson, John Gor don. of Hay, Neb.; Peter Winn, of Atkinson, Neb. 4-6 JOHN A. HARMON, Register. NOTICE. IH THE DISTRICT COURT OF HOLT Cor, NEBRASKA. n Wyman Patrldge A Company, plaintiff, vs. W. P. O’Brien. McCord, Brady Comnm,, Abies & Company. H. L. McDonald Goods Company, Dempster Mill Mimin’ urlng Company, Albert Voorhcis , Lewis I'.. Miller, defendants. The above named defendants and or,,, them will take notice that on the 2d. d,: June, 1821, the above named plalntlll, their petliion In the district court of ,, county. Nebraska, against the above defendants and each of them, the object prayer of said petition- being to force!,, certain mortgage executed by thejdeli i W. P. O’Urlen to the plaintiff, upon 11„ lowing described real estato situated i „ o county. Nebraska, to-wlt: The east the northwest quarter and the west the northeast quarter of section twenio. (22), township twenfy-flve (25), range tisi (15), west of the fltli P. 51., which mort" was given to secure the payment ,,f" promissory notes; four for the sum o, each and one for the sum of 1188.08, all, due and payable; that there is now due said notes and mortgage tbe sum of >,p for which sum, with Interest frog, tills s', plaintiff prays for a decree that the ,ic, ants be required to pay the same or that! premises may be sold. to satisfy tho I, ,h. found due. And further, that the l„u, of all of said defendants be decreed.; subject, junior and Inferior to the plaintiff's said mortgage. You are required to answer said petit on or before the 27tli day of August. Iwu Dated at O'Neill. Neb., this 16th