The frontier. (O'Neill City, Holt County, Neb.) 1880-1965, March 31, 1892, Image 6

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BiMpiemMi t'nrca. iv
t am gled to testify that I ond Pestor Koo
nfg’e Norn Toule with tbs beet success for
Sleeplessness, auid belloro tbat It 1* really ■
great relief for suffering humanity.
X. FRANK, Pastor,
Bt. Sererln, Keylerton P. O., Pa.
Uses What It Purports to Do.
Pixbton, Ohio, March a, 1891.
1 rent with my brother to aee the Iter. Koe.
nig and he gare the Nerre Tonlo to him—the
Brat I ever heard of It—and It cured him. BlnoS
then 1 keep Paator Koenig’s Nerre Tonio ou
hand In my store and haro sold it with good
satisfaction, and bellere If directions are tol>
lowed It will do what is seoommended.
JOHN W. HALEY.
rhrr-fti^^t^m-varass
I Hf r ud poor patient* can also obtali
| ULL thin medicine ftee of ohtri*.
Thla remedy bH beon prepared by the Reverend
Paetor Koenlf. of Fort Wavne, Ind- alnoe IWC and
U now prepared under hit direction by the
KOINIO MED. DO.. Oh'oago, III.
■old by Druggists at It per Battle. tferN
tsuaHw aL75. 0 Bottles Itar as.
“MOTHERS’
FRIEND”
To Young
Mothers
Makes Child Birth Easy, j
Shortens Labor, f
Lessens Pain, |
Endorsed by the Leading Physicians, f
Booh to "Mothort • > mail'd XJtXX. 9
BRADFIELD REGULATOR GO. I
ATLANTA, OA. 2
■OLD BY ALL DRUGGIST*. 9
•NNNNHNWNMMNNMNHII
Treating Ailing
Women by Letter A
Most cases of
diseases can be
treated as well
by -us through
the malls as by
personal con
sultation. _ In writing for
advice, give age and
symptoms of your com
plaint, state length of
time you have been sut
, ferine, and what means
you have tried to obtain
relief.
Mrs. Pinkham fully and
carefully answers all let
ters of inquiry, and charges
. nothing for her advice.
J' All correspondence is
tial. Your letters will be received and
answered by one of your own sex. Address,
Lydia K. Pinkham Medical Co,
a Lynn, Mass.
Kennedy’s
i Medical Discovery
Takes hold in this order:
Bowels*
.Liver,
A Kidneys,
Inside Skin,
. Ontside Skin,
. Driving ev«rjrUiln« baton It that ought
f s to he out.
You know whether you
f- need it or not.
Sold by avary druggist, and manufactured by
DONALD KENNEDY,
• ROXBURY. MASS.
I
Ip
i-A u
v'“ t
sr
tef ■/
£?:• "■
SHILOH S
CONSUMPTION
CURE.
This GREAT COUGH CURE, this success,
ful CONSUMPTION CURE is sold by drug
gists on » positive guarantee, s test thst no other
Cure can stand successfully.
If you have a
LAGRIPPE.it
COUGH. HOARSENESS or LA I
will cure you promptly. If your child has the
CROUP or WHOOPING COUGH, use it
quickly and relief is sure. If you fear CON
SUMPTION. don't wait until your case is hope
less, but take this Cure at once and recei vt
immediate help. Price 50c and $ixxx
Ask your druggist for SHILOH’S CUKE.
If your lungs are sore or back lame, ust
Shiloh's Porous Plasters.
PILES
AN AKK8I8 Misee tm
relict. hiiJ is u INF/
JJUt CURE tor F_
Price. $1; at drucaUu or
br mall. 8ampie* free.
Address “ANAKKSIB,"
Tons City.
Boi *414. Nkw 1
|BEST POLISH IN THK WORLD.]
Stove polish
00 MOT BE DECEIVED
with Pastes, Enamels, and Paints which
at£lntlie hands, injure the iron, ntul burn
off. The llfaing Bun Stove Polish is Bril
liant, Odorlnaa, Durable, and the con
Burner nays for no tin or glass package
itli every purchase.
MSMMUfcMLEOFS^OOTNt
zm
1 ka •'' '
FORMALITY IN RELIGION
Hypocritical Pretense Receives a
Castigation.
The Tcople Who Ar© Alarmed at On© Sin
of Their Neighbor's Fall to Notice
Twenty of Their Own—Cam
els Easily Swallowed.
Brooklyn, N. Y., March 28.—Dr. Tal
mage created a grout stir in tho Brooklyn
tabernacle yesterday morning by making
the following announcement:
"I am happy lo say that as a church,
after the exhausting work of building
three immense churches, two of them hav
ing been destroyed by tire—a burden never
before put upon the back of any congre
gation—we are now financially in smooth
waters. Arrangement* have been made
by which our pecuniary difficulties are
fully adjusted. Our lucome exceeds our
outgo, ami this church will be yours and
your children's hereafter.
When I came to Brooklyn, I came to a
small church with a big indebtedness.
We now worship in this, the largest Pro
testant church in America, and finan
cially, as a congregation, we are worth
over mid beyond all indebtedness, consid
erably more than ilftj.OUO. I ask you to
rise, and led by cornet and organ, to
join in singing.
"Praise God From Whom All Blessings
Flow.’*
A proverb U compact wisdom, knowl
edge In chunks, a library in a sentence,
tho electricity of many clouds dis
charged in one bolt, a river put through
a mill race. When Christ quotes the
proverb of the text, he means to set
forth thel ludicrous behavior of those
who make a great bluster about small
sins and have no appreciation of great
ones.
In my text a small insect and a largo
quadruped are brought into compari
son—a gnat and a camel. You have in
museum or on the desert seen the lat
ter, a great, awkward, sprawling
creature with back two 6torieB high,
and stomach having a collection of
reservoirs for desert travel, an animal
forbidden to the Jows as food, and in
many literatures entitled “the Bhip of
the desert” The gnat spoken of in
the text Is in the grub form. It is
born in pool or pond, aftora few weeks
becomes a chrysalis, and then after a
few days becomes a gnat as we recog
nize it lint the insect spoken of in
the text is in its very smallest shape,
and it yet iuhubits the water—for my
text is a misprint and ought to read
“strain out a gnat”
My tost shows you the princo of in
consistencies. A man after long ob
servation has formed the supicion that
in a cup of water he is about to drink,
there is a grub or the grandparent of a
gnat lie goes and gets a sieve or
strainer. lie takes the water and
pours it through the sieve in the broad
light He says, “I would rather do
anything almost than drink this water
until this larva bo extirpated. ” This
water is brought under inquisition.
The experiment is successful. The
water rushes through the sievo and
leaves against the side of the sieve the
grub or gnat. Then tho man carefully
removes the insect and drinks the
water in placidity. Hut going out one
day, and hungry, ho devours a “ship
of the desert,” tho camel, which the
Jews were forbidden to eat The gas
tronomer has no compunctions of con
science. lie suiters for no indigestion,
lie puts the lower jaw under the
earners forefoot and his upper jaw
over tho hump of the camel's back, and
gives one swallow and the dromedary
disappears forever. He strained out a
gnat, he swallowed a camel.
While Christ's audience were yet
smiling at the appositeness and wit oi
his illustration—for smile they did in
church, unless they were too stupid to
understand tho hyperbole—Christ prac
tically said to them, "That is you.”
Punctilious about small things; reckless
about affairs of great magnitude. No
subject ever writhed under a surgeon's
knife more than did the Pharisees
under Christ's scalpel of truth. As
an anatomist will take a human body
to pieces and put them under a
microscope for examination, sc
Christ finds his way to the heart
of the dead Pharisee and cuts
it out and put its under the glass ol
inspection for all generations to ex
ainiuu. inose rnansees tnougnt that
Christ would flatter them and compli
ment them, and how they must have
writhed under the red-hot words as he
said: “Ye tools, ye whited sepulchres,
ye blind guides which strain out a gnat
and swallow a camel."
There are in our day a great many
gnats strained out and a great many
camels swallowed, and it is the object
of this sermon to sketch a few persons
who are extensively engaged in that
business.
First, I remark, that all those min
isters of the goipel are photographed
in the text who are very scrupulous
about the conventionalities of religion,
but put no particular stress upon mat
ters of vast importance. Church servi
ces ought to be grave and solemn.
There is no room for frivolity in relig
ious convocation. But there are Illus
trations. and there are hyperboles like
that of Christ in the text that will
Irradiate with smiles any intelligent
auditory. There are men like those
blind guides of the text who advocate
only those things in religious service
which draw the corners of the mouth
down, and denounce all those thingi
which have a tendency to draw the
corners of the mouth up, and these
men will go to installations and tc
presbyteries and to conferences and tc
associations, their pockets full of fine
sieves to strain out ilia gnats,
while in their own churches nl
home every Sunday there are flftj
people sound asleep. They make theii
churches a great dormitory, and theii
somniforous sermons are a cradle, and
the drawied-out hymns a lullaby, while
some wakeful soul in a pew with liei
fan keeps the flies off unconscious per
sons approximate Now. 1 say it i«
worse to sleep in church than to smile
in church, for the latter implies at
least attention, while the former im
plies the indifference of the heareri
and the stupidity of the speaker. Is
old age, or from physical infirmity, 01
from long watching with the sick,
drowsiness will sometimes overpowei
one; but when a minister of the Gospel
looks upon an audience and findi
healthy and intelligent people strug
ling with drowsiness, it is time foi
"i<mw - \s^.T-?
■ .. -' ■ . ; ■
him to give out the doxology or pro
nounce the benediction. The great
fault of cburcli services today is not
too much vivacity, but too much som
nolence. The one is an irritating gnat
that may be easily strained out; the
other is a great, sprawling and sleepy
eyed camel of the dry desert In all
our Sabbath schools, in all our Bible
classes, in all our pulpits we need to
brighten up our religious message with
such Christ-like vivacity as we find in
the text.
I take down from my library tho
biographies of ministers and writers
of past ages, inspired and unin
spired, who have done the most
to bring souls to Jesus Christ,
and I find that without a single
exception they consecrated their wit
and their humor to Christ. Elijah used
it when he advised the Baalltes, as
i they could not make their god respond;
telling them to call louder as their god
might be sound asleep or gone a hunt
ing. Job used it when he said to his
self-conceited comforters, “Wisdom
will die with you.” Christ not only
used it in the text, but when he iron
ically complimented the putrified
Pharisees, saying, “Tho whole need
not a physician,” and when by one
word he described the cunning of
Herod, saying; “Go ye and tell that
fox. ” Matthew Henry's commentaries
from the first page to the last corus
cated with humor as summer clouds
with heat lightning. John Hunyan's
writings are as full of humor as they
are of saving truth, and there is not an
aged man here who has ever read Pil
grim's Progress who does not remem
ber that while reading it he smiled as
often as he wept Chrysostom, George
Herbert, Robert South, John Wesley,
George Whitefleld, Jeremy Taylor,
Rowland Hill, Nettleton, George G.
Finney, and all the men of the past
who greatly advanced the kingdom of
God consecrated their wit and their
humor. to tho causo of Christ. So it
has been in all the ages, and I say to
these young theological students, who
cluster in these services Sabbath by
Sabbath, sharpen your wits as keen as
scimitars, and then take them into this
holy war. It is a very short bridge be
tween a smile and a tear, a suspension
bridge from eyo to lip, and it is
soon crossed over, and a smile is some
J oai.iuu aa n bCitl . X lit?TO
is as much religion, and I think a little
more, in a spring morning than in a
starless midnight. Religious work
without any humor or wit in it is a
banquet with a sido of beef, and that
raw, and no condiments and no dessert
succeeding. People will not sit down at
such a banquet, liy all means remove all
frivolity and all bathos and all vulgar
ity—strain them out through the sieve
of holy discrimination; but, on the
other hand, beware of that monster
which overshadows the Christian
church today, conventionality, coming
up from the great Sahara desert of ec
clesiasticism, having on its back a
hump of sanctimonious gloom, and ve
hemently refuse to swallow that
camel
Oh, how particular a great many
people are about the infinitesi
mals, while they are quite reckless
about the magnitudes. What did Christ
say?. Did he not excoriate the people
in his time who were bo careful to
wash their hands before a meal but
did not wash their hearts? It is a
bad thing to have unclean hands; it is
a worse thing to have an unclean heart.
How many people there nre in our
time who are very anxious that after
their death they shall be buried with
their feet toward the east, and not at
all anxious that during their whole
life they should face in the right
direction so that they stall come
up in the resurrection of the just
whichever way they are buried.
How many there are chiefly anxious
that a_ minister of the gospel shall
come in the line of apostolic succes
sion, not caring so much whether he
comes from Apostle Paul or Apostle
Judas. They have a way of measur
ing a gnat until it is larger than a
camel.
Again: My subject photographs all
those who are abhorent of small sins
while they are reckless in regard to
magnificent thefts. You will find
many a merchant who, whilo he is so
careful that he would not take a yard
of cloth or a spool of cotton from the
counter without paying for it, and who
if a bank cashier should make a mis
take and send in a roll of bills 85 too
much would dispatch a messenger in
hot haste to return the surplus, yet
who will go into a stock comnnnv tn
which after a while he pet* control of
the stock, and then waters the stock
and make 8100,000 appear like *200, -
000. He only stole *100,000 by the
operation. Many of the men of fort
une made their wealth in that way.
One of those men, engaged in such un
righteous acts, that evening, the even
ing of the very day when he watered
the atook, will find a wharf-rat steal
ing an evening newspaper from the
basement doorway and will go out and
catch the urchin by the collar, and
twist the collar so tightly the poor
fellow cannot say that it was thirst
for knowledge that led him to the
dishonest act, but grip the collar
tighter and tighter, saying, ‘‘I have
been looking for you a long while;
you stole my paper four or five times,
haven't you? you miserable wretch.”
And then the old stock gambler, with
a voice they can hear three blocks, will
cry out: “Police, police!” That same
man, the evening of the day in which
he watered the stock, will kneel with
his family in prayer and thank God
for the prosperity of the day, then kiss
his children good-night with an air
which seems to say, “I hope you will
all grow up to be as good as your
father!” Prisons for sins insectile in
size, but palaces for crimes dromedar
ian. No merev for sins animalcule in
proportion, but great leniency for mas
todon iniquity.
Olt is time that we learned in America
that sin is not excusable in proportion
as it declares large dividends and has
out-riders in equipage. Many a man
is riding to perdition, postilion ahead
land lackey behind. To steal a dollar
is a gnat; to steal many thousands of
dollars is a camel. There is many a
fruit dealer who would not consent to
steal a basket of peaches from a neigh
bor s stall, but who would not scruple
to depress the fruit market; and as
long as I can remember we have heard
every summer the peach crop of Mary
land is a failure, and by the time the
crop comes in the misrepresentation
makes a difference of millions of dol
lar*- A man who would not steal one
peach basket steals 50.000 peach bas
ket* Any summer go down into
the Mercantile library, in the read
ing rooms, and see the newspaper
reports of the crops from all parts
of the country, and their phraseology
is very much the same, and the same
men wrote them, methodically and in
famously carrying out the huge lying
about the grain crop from year to year
and for a score of years. After a while
there is a "corner” in the wheat mar
ket, and men who had a contempt for
a petty theft will burglarize the wheat
bin of a nation and commit larceny
upon the American corn crib. And
men will sit in churches and in re
formatory institutions trying to strain
out the small gnats of scouudrclism,
while in their grain elevators and in
tlioir storehouses they are fattening
huge camels which they expect after a
whilo to swallow. Society has to be
entirely reconstructed on this subject
We are to find that a sin is inexcusable
in proportion as it is great
i know in our time the tendency is
to charge religious frauds upon good
men. They say, "Oh, what a class
o' frauds you have in the church
of Qod in this day,” and when an eider
of a church, or a deacon, or a minister
of the gospel, or a superintendent of a
Sabbath school turns out a delaulter,
what display heads there are in many
of the newspapers. Ureat primer type.
Five-line pica. “Another Saint Ab
sconded,” “Clerical Scoundrelism,”
“Religion at a Discount,” “Shame on
tho Churches,” while there are a
thousand scoundrels outside the church
to where there Is one inside the
church, and the misbehavior of those
wiio never see the inside of a church
is so great it is enough to tempt a man
to become a Christian to get
out of their company. Hut in
ail circles, religious and irre
ligious, the tendency is to excuse
sin in proportion as it is mam
moth. Even John Milton, in his l*ara
djse Lost, while he condemns Satan,
gives such a grand description of him
you have hard work to suppress your
admiration. Oh, this straining out of
small sins like gnats and gulping
down great iniquities like carnets.
This subject does not give the pic
ture of one or two persons, but it is a
gallery in which thousands of people
may see tlieir likenesses. For instance
all those people, who, while they would
not rob their neighbor of a farthing,
ti nnrnnt-i o tn f tl.. X _
ure of tho public. A man has a house
to sell and he tells his neighbor it is
worth $20,000. Next day tho assessor
comes around and the owner says it is
worth $15,000. The government of the
United States took off tho tax from
person:!! incomes among other reasons
because so few people would tell the
truth, and many a man with an in
come of hundreds of dollars a day
mado statements which seemed to
imply he was about to be handed over
to the overseer of the poor. Careful
to pay their passage from Liverpool to
New York, yet smuggling in their
Saratoga trunk ten silk dresses from
Paris and a half dozen watches from
Geneva, Switzerland, telling tho cus
tom house officer on the wharf, “There
is nothing in that trunk but wearing
apparel,” and putting a flve-dollar
gold piece in his hand to punctuate
the statement
Described in the text are all
those who are particular never to
break the law of grammar, and
who want all their language
an elegant specimen of syntax, strain
ing out all the inaccuracies of speech
with a tine sieve of literary criticism,
while through their conversation go
slander and innuendo and profanity
and falsehood larger than a whole
caravan of camels, while they might
bettor fracture every law "of the
language and shock their intellectual
taste, and better let every verb seek in
vain for its nominative, amd every
noun for its government, and every
preposition lose its way in the sen
tence. and adjectives and participles
and pronouns get into a grand riot
worthy of the Fourth ward cn election
day than to commit a moral inaccuracy,
ltettor to swallow a thousand gnats
than one camel. '
Such persons are also described in
the text who are very much alarmed
about the small faults of others, and
have no alarm about their own great
transgressions There are in every
community and in every church, watch
dogs who feel called upon to keep their
eyes on others and growl. They are
full of suspicions. They wonder if
that man is not dishonest, if that mim
is not unclean, if there is not some
thing wrong about the other man.
They are always the first to hear of
uuyLuiug wrung. \ uiiurcs are always
the first to smell carrion. They are
self-appointed detectives. I lay this
down as a rale without any exception,
that those people who have the most
faults themselves are most merciless in
their watching1 of others. From scalp
of head to sole of foot they are full of
jealousies and hypercrilicisins. They
spend their life bunting for musk rats
and mud turtles instead of hunting for
Uocky Mountain eagles, always for
something mean instead of something
grand. They look at their neighbors’
Imperfections through a microscope,
and look at their own imperfections
through a telescope upside down.
Twenty faults of their own do not hnrt
them half so much as one fault of
somebody else. Their neighbors’ im
perfections are like gnats and they
strain them out; their own imperfec
tions are like camels and they swallow
them.
Brea- lug It Gently.
Foreman (quarry gang)—It sad news
Oi hov’ fur yez, Mrs. McOahnrraghty.
Y’r husband's new watch is broken It
wax a foine Watch, an’ it’s smashed all
to paces.
Mrs MeO.—Dearie me. How did
that happen?
Foreman—A ten-ton rock fell on him.
Pleaslug > Boy.
Paterfamilias — Have you
bicycles?
Dealer—Yes, sir. Do you want a
safety or the other kind?
Huml Let's see Is a safety so
named because it is safe
Yes, sir.
Perfectly safe?
Absolutely, sir.
Then I feel very sure my boy will
pre.er the other kind.
Quoting the Uoetors.
Mother—You haven't cleaned your
teeth this morning.
Small boy—Dr. Pnllem says the time
to clean teeth is at night
But you never clean them at night
No’m Dr. Fillein says the best time
is in the morning,
ib&r* *****' * '. rw? ^ ^ r
A CLEVER TRICK.
Bov tlae Killers of a Gamekeeper In Iro*
land Saved Tlieir Necks.
“See that man -in the cprnct of the
Jar?” said a gentleman to a Boston
Globe man in a Back Bav car one even
ing last week. “Look him oven quick
ly, for he will get out at the next stop.”
i'he man referred to was of medium
height, well dressed, had a determined
expression, and would pass as a busi
ness man.
“That man,” continued the speaker,
“figured in one of the most sensational
murders ever committed in Ireland,
and he escaped by one of the cleverest
tricks known to the human mind. I
refer to the shooting affray that took
place on Lord Clifton’s estate in a
place called Brandon Hill, County
Kilkenny, Aug. 7, 1888, when the
poachers and five gamekeepers came
together, and before they separated
one member of each party was stretch
ed on the field dying.
“One of the gamekeepers who pur
sued the poachers was more venture
some than the rest and started out in
advance of his companions. After
wandering about for an hour he was
startled by a handsome bird dog
bounding toward him. A moment
later the dog lay struggling at his feet
with a handful of buckshot in his head
and breast. The discharge of the gun
attracted one of the poachers named
Pat Burns, who emerged from the
cover, gun in hand, his face covered
with a mask.
, “Burns asked: ‘Did you shoot that
dog?’ Welch replied: ‘Yes, “and if
you don’t look out I will also shoot
you.’ Burns did not scare worth a
cent, but bent down on one knee and
examined the dog’s wounds. When
lie got up Welch had a bead on him.
YVelch was about to pull the trigger oi
his gun when a report rang out in the
bushes near by and W*elch, the game
keeper, was lying on the ground with
a load of shot in his head.
“The noise attracted other game
keepers, who took it for granted that
Burus was the mau who had shot theii
comrade, and they at once opened lire
nn him n t »xf K<ii
the blood was running from his wounds
and 100 yards distant lie fell from ex
haustion. A rapid exchange of shots
followed and the poachers were driven
bjick. The keepers gave up the chase
to care for their fallen comrade,Welch
who was in awful agony. Burns, the
wounded poacher, would probably
have survived, but one of the keepers
pulled the bandage off his wounded
leg, and he lived only an hour, having
bled to death. Welch, the keeper,
died at the end of the eighth day.
“Kilkenny jail was crowded with sus
pects a week after the shooting took
place. After the shooting the poach
ers took to the mountains. A surgeon
was called to vaccinate a child in the
neighborhood. The poachers kepi
watch of the child, and when t he prop
er time came took the virus, and aftei
scraping the llesh around their shot
wounds they inoculated themselves
The result was the shot-wounds wort
completely covered with cowpoj
marks. The poachers were finally ar
rested and lodged in Kilkennny jail.
When the wound's on their arms were
discovered experts were called in tc
examine them, but after a most crit
ical examination lasting all day the
men were released.
“That man I pointed out to you,*
continued the speaker, “is ono of the
two men wiio evaded justice so clever
ly. I came to this country six month
later than ho did and was astonished
to find him engaged in a lucrative
business.”
Sent llhn a Cutting Note.
Of course she was provoked when
he passed her on the street without
stopping to speak to her. He lifted
his hat, it is true, but she recalled the
lime when he would have turned and
walked several blocks with her, no
matter how pressing his business.
Hadn't they been sweethearts a few
years before? Why should the fact
that they hnd not met for three years
so change him? Ought he not to be
the more pleased to sec her?
The more she thought of it the more
she felt that he should have paid her
some little attention, if only for the
Btijvu ui um tuiicft, svuu wnen sne reacii
9il home she was so angry that she re
solved to make him repcut his apparcnl
•light.
The next day he received the follow
ingt
Mr. Fllklns: I believe you hove a photo
graph of me—ono that l save vou oevemi
years ago In a uioueut of girlish folly. I bavi
•mce regretted t‘mt I was so thoughtless in
such matters. 1 will esteem it a favor if yen.
will return tlie photograph at your earliest
tonvenience. Etliel Deane.
She held that it was a cutting note
and that it would bring him to hit
Benses if anything would. She told
her best friend that she had brought
him up with a round turn, but she
didn't tell her best friend anything
about tho following reply which sh<
received:
Miss Deane: If you insist, of course I wit
do as you wish, but It will he a great deprive
tfon to the baby. The little fellow is passion
ately fond of pictures, and for neariv sir
months the photograph of you has been re
garded as his especial property. Still my wif<
says she will take It away from him if yot
really need It. Very truly,
Albert Fllklns.
She didn't send for it. She didn’t
Bven bow to him when she next met
him on the street. She didn't do any
thing except wonder when he wai
married ana why she was so foolish.—
Chicago Tribune.
A Matter of Pride.
Small Boy—“I wan ter take gas."
Dentist—"It is not usual to admin
ister gas for milk tooth, my boy. It
won't hurt but an instant.”
"You’ve gotter gimme gas or I won’t
have it pulled.”
“You shouldn't be so afraid of being
hurt. Now sit right up here like a
little man.’’
“I ain't 'fraid of bein' hurt. Tain’l
that. I’m afraid I can't help givin’ a
screech when it conics out.”
“That won’t matter.”
“Yes, it will, too. All th’ hoys wol
I’ve ever licked is waitin’ under th'
winder to hear mo holler.”— Ooob
Newt.
A gold coin loses 5 per cent of ib
value in sixteen years of constant use
i •-y ?h,‘ '•
THE KHEDIVIA.
A Woman WIm Wm the
tho Lata TewOt-. Wtt*
Tlie foremost wife of the latp
of Egypt,, formally known ^
khedivia, is worthy of considerabU
notice, as being in advance both
her race and her people, savs the Cin
cinnati Enquirer. Her rovalhp!v ,
did not bj any
harem, but more than anv soveroi
of his class he elevated her above
common throng. Up to 1887 she hart
never seen a man save the khedw.
and the first that she did seei
him was a photographer. She wm
pretty, and she wanted the world
know it. A little later-in 188*1*'
American lady, who had some consid
erable reputation as an artist, was em
ployed to paint her portrait. It ij
from this picture that current repre
sentations of her face mostly come
She made and insisted upon some
startling departures from the habits of
her race, and yet they did not go so
very far. She never “received" with
her royal husband. When he gave a
ball she could only look through the
lattice. But she gave audience con
stantly to women, talking French only
and exhibiting both charming manl
ners and a bright mind.
In 1889 she was described, by one
who saw her, as 81 years old, and com
plaining that she was “getting fat and
very old’’—“a pomegranate face, still
lovely enough, in a slightly heavy
way, with liquid brown eyes, a pretty
pout-lag mouth, and a dimple in the
chin—unmistakably, however, a double
chin." One sometimes met her with,
the whole harem driving in close car
riages out toward the desert. To con
template the monumental pyramid!
and to guess at the riddle of the
Sphinx? Dear, no! To sit and eat'
bon-bons, e^ch out of her embroidered
bag. The portrait can be seen in Gain
—“a rich, warm color-scheme of golder
browns in the fur-edged velvet robe,
with yellow lace inside; pearls in th».
dark braided hair; a face that not in
frequently suggests the houri of tin
Koran, and a band which, though deli
cately formed, seems more that of i
baby than an empress.”
a LUCKy £<cape.
Fortunate is the man or woman residing
in a malaria-ridden locality who escapes
the dreaded scourge. Not one in a thousand
does. When the epidemic is a periodical
and wide spread visitation, it is just as
common to see whole communities suffer*
ing from it as single individuals, i In
most vigorous constitution is not
proof against it—how much less a
system feeble or disordered. As a
means of projection against malaria, uosi
tetter’s Stomach Bitters is the supreme
medicinal agent. It will uproot any form
of malarial disease implanted in the sys.
tem, and even in regions where miasmatic
complaints are most malignant and
deadly, such as the Isthmus of Panama,
Guatemala and the tropics generally, it ii
justly regarded as an efficient safeguard.
No less efficacious is it as a curative and
preventive of chronic indigestion, livei
trouble, constipatiou. rheumatism, kidney
complaints and la grippe.
A Smart Boy.
Little Dick—There goes Johnny
Smart on a safety. He’s the brightest
boy in town.
Father—How so?
He got himself a rich father.
Humph! I don't understand.
Why, his real father died, an’ then
an orfui rich man got ’quainted with
his mother, but he didn’t like Johnny}
so Johnny he pretended he was sick
an’ goin’ to die; and then, after the
rich man married his mother, he got
welL
A Brilliant Dltcovery In Dematology.
It is said that superfluous hair can be
permanently removed without pain. An
interesting and valuable discovery has«re*
cently been made by John H. Woodbury,
of 125 West Forty-second street. New York
city. It is a remedy for the permanent re*
moval of supetfluous hair, consisting of a
fluid which is applied to tho hair follicle
by means of an electric needle. It is de*
signed to be used by patients at theii
homes, and is said to be fully as effectual
as electricity. Full particulars in refer*
ence to this valuable remedy are found m
a little book of 1-8 pages, which is sent to
any address for 10 cents, on application to
the discoverer.
Little Boy—Now that you’re got sis
|ter a piano, I think you might buy mt
a pony.
Papa—Why?
Little Boy—So I can get away from
the piana
Brin op Ono, Crrr op Toledo, I
IiUCAB CcOKTT. I *
Fbamk J. Chunky makes oath that he Is toe
senior partner of the firm of F. J. Cheney A
Co., doing bnslness In the City of Toledo, County
and State aforesaid, and that said Ann will pay
the sum of ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS lot
each and every ease of Citaiuih that cannot be
cured by tbs use of Hall’s Catakbu Cube.
FRANK J. CHKNEY.
Sworn to before me aud subscribed in my
presence, this Oth day of December, A. D. 1880,
Y~*— , A. W. GLEASON
•J UU.L. j- Notary Public.
Hall's Catarrh Cure Is takru internally, an#
•eta directly on the blood and mucous suriaces
Of the system. Bend for testimonials, free.
F. J. CHENEY A CO., Toledo, U
JVSold by druggists, 75c.
—Poisoning by mussels is a well known
fact. Such poisoning appears in chronis
form in Terra del Fuego, mussels being
abundant on the shores and other kinds
of food rare, so that the natHrea eat lnrgs
quantities of the former daily, both of had
and of good quality.
When Baby wae sick, we fare her Caitorie,
Whan she was a Child, she cried forCsstoria,
When sba became Miss, she clung to CMtoria,
When she had Children, she gar e them CMtor**
—The British museum has secured from
rhlbet a copy of the Jangyn. a mo
syelopedla of Thibetan buddLism. “
somprlses 825 volumes, each of wb
I feet long and 6 Inches thick. The
tie supposed, only two other copie*
eork outside of Thibet.
Coughing Deads to Consumption.
Kemp’s Balsam will atop the Cong
moo. Go to your Druggist V><1*^*hottfe«
t FREE .ample bottla. Large hot
W cents and >1-00._
—A favorite food Hah j.^nee*
[t contains two bones. which the J P
sail, from their shape, the hoe Mnbef
When eating the fish a mother will ^
ihlldren, “Now wait ““l*1‘.idnusethe*
toe and tickle," and the children use
w play things.
I