Laundry work at homo would ba
much more satisfactory if the right
Starch were used. In order to got the
desired stiffness, It is usually neces
sary to uso so much starch that the
beauty and fineness of the fabric is
hidden behind a paste of varying
thickness, which not only destroys the
appearance, but also affects the wear
ing quality of the goods. This trotr
ble can bo entirely overcome by using
Defiance Starch, as it can bo applied
much moro thinly because of its great
er strength than other makes.
"Riot at Yale" A Recipe.
Take half a hundred Shcff Fresh
men dying of ennui, and the same
number of academic feeling the same
way ony more so. Mix well by the
flagpole, and pour into Church street.
Introduce nt two-minute intervals half
a dozen trolleys with temptingly- dang
ling ropes. Now put in on the run
three or four vigilant representatives
of the law, stir till the whole mass
comes to red heat, and then pick out
un entirely Innocent grind, and place
in tho cooler to cool. Garnish with
hugo headlines and servo for break
fast to fond parents, etc. Yale Record.
That an article may bo good as well
as cheap, and give entire satisfaction,
is proven by the extraordinary sale of
Defiance Starch, each package con
taining one-third moro Starch than
can be had of any other brand for tho
same money.
Dad's Dilemma.
"I see your girl has a beau."
"Yes," said the damsel's father,
"and I don't know just how to handle
the mutt. Shall 1 be friendly with
him, and lose my dignity; or shall I
hold myself aloof and be considered
in old grouch?"
AN HONEST DOCTOR
ADVISED PE-RU-NA.
MR. SYLVESTER E. SMITH, Room
mn - 11. Til 1 C3I. 1 . . 1 lf
writes: "Poruna is tho best friend n
sick man can havo.
"A few months ago I camo hero in a
wretched condition. Exposuro and
dampness had ruined my onco robust
health. I had catarrhal affections of
tho bronchial tubes, and for a time thcro
was a doubt as to my recovery.
"My good honost old doctor advised
mo to tako Poruna, which I did and in
a short timo my health began to im
prove very rapidly, tho bronchial
trouble gradually disappeared, and in
threo months my health was fully re
stored. "Accept a grateful man's thanks for
his restoration to perfect health."
Pe-ru-na for Ills Patients.
A. W. Porrln, M. D. S., 080 Halsoy
St., Brooklyn, N. Y., says :
"I am using your Peruna mysolf, and
am recommending it to my pationts in
all cases of catarrh, and find it to bo
moro than you rcprosont. Poruna can
bo had now of all druggists in this sec
tion. At tho timo I began using it, it
was unknown."
Food
Products
Libby's
Vienna Sausage
You've never tasted
the best sausage until
you've ,eaten Libby's
Yicnna Sausage,
It's asausage product
of high food value!
Made different! Cook"
ed different! Tastes
different and is different
than other sausage!
Libby's Vienna
Sausage, like all of the
Libby Food Products;
is carefully prepared
and cooked in Libby's
Great White Kitchen.
It can be quickly
served for any meal at
any time! It is pleas
ing; not over-flavored
and has that satisfying
taste! Try it!
Libby, McNeill ft Libby,
Chicago.
jM
Lim
itn on
Worn
Old Lim Jueklin put aside his news
paper, arose, stood on the hearth, and
remarked to his wife, who sat in a
rocking chair, half dreamily knitting:
"They must hire folks by the year to
do nothin' else but to write about
women."
Ttfby want to furnish the men
somethin' to read," his wife replied.
"Furnish the men somethin' to skip
so's to read somethin else," said tho
old man. "Once in a while I read 'cm
though, and I've just read a lot of
stuff that I know wan't written by
anybody, man or woman, that had
anything elso to do a whole column
and a half tellin' how to raise chil
dren; and I'll bet a steer it was writ
ten by an old maid."
"Limuel, what are you talkin'
about?"
"An old maid, I said; and one of
tho sort that snatches up her skirts
and runs like a turkey hen whenever
she sees a child a cumin toward her
Oh, I know their brand."
"Yes, I suppose so," said his wife.
"But a woman that a raisin' children
hasn't got time to write, and one that
has them already raised is so tired
she don't feel like it."
"Oh, I expected to get it, one way I
or another," replied the old man. "It
was due and I deserved it. But It
does seem that the writers on the sub
ject of women ought to stumble on
somethin new. But man has been
studyin' women now, let me see.
Well, patticularly ever since Sam
son's wife cut his hair off, and
he hasn't stumbled on anything new
yet I've given her a good deal of my
time and I'm ready to make my ac
knowledgments. I've summed up my
account book. Two and two make
four anywhere else. But with woman
two and two sometimes make six.
You can't tell. Figgers don't lie, but
with her they are mighty accommo
datin'. And, Lord bless her, she has
finally discovered that man is her
enemy. The old maids have told her
so and she has begun to believe it.
Over here across the creek tho other
day a party of 'em had a meetin' and
resolved that man was a tyrant and
ought to be ousted. Old Miss Patsy
Page, that has chased every chance to
get married that she could find
through a spyglass a comin' her way,
was the president. She ,called atten
tion to the number of divorces
throughout the country, and she
sighed over all this waste of raw ma
terial. She read a paper, too, on how
to manage a husband. Bet she'd like
to read a book on how to catch one."
"Limuel. she's a good woman. She
sets up wflh tho sick."
"Yes, and when she does the well
folks catch it. She'd sour a mornin's
milk by lookin' the cow in the eye."
"Well," replied the old lady, "she
says that you used to come to see her,
and she has hinted that she could
have had you."
"Ha, if I'd married her she would
have had me you can bet a settin' of
eggs on that."
"It was the talk of the neighborhood
how you used to go to dances with
her."
"Yes, it was the talk of the neigh
borhood whenever anybody went with
her at all. Gad, she had a tongue that
would pick out a briar. And now she
is a reformer, an upllfter of downtrod
women. Well, she spent about two
thirds of her life tryin' to tread 'em
down. I can recollect when every girl
in the neighborhood was afraid of her.
An old gypsy came along one time and
had some love powders for sale, and
Miss Patsy she bought some and man-.
aged to give 'em to Zeb Collins. She
must have given him about half a
pound from tho way he acted. Went
out and hung over the back fence
and called hogs for ten minutes, he
did. After awhile when he was silent
she looked out after him and he was
a ketchin' of his horse. Wo called him
Bakin'-Powder Zeb after that. But be
didn't rise."
"I don't believe she gave hiin the
powders."
"No, just loaned 'em to him. At any
rate, he got 'em. And now you trace
back some of tho biggest of these
women reformers and you'll find love
powders in their lives somewhere.
There ain't nothin' on the earth bright
er than a bright woman and there's
nobody the Lord ought'to shower His
favors down on more than her. No
matter how good a man is ho can't
begin to ketch up with her. Sho Is
tenderness, love, truth, religion all
in one. But when sho's plzenous
look out. That is tho timo for Satan
himself to dodgo. And I'll bet every
timo he sees old Miss Patsy comin'
he takes to his flinty heels. When a
man's disappointed with life he gen
erally tries to keep It to himself. But
with a woman she not only wants it
to bo known, but wants to make oth
ers dissatisfied."
"Yes," said Mrs. Jueklin. "for when
e formers
ky Opic Head
a man's a failure it's his own fault. A
woman could never have helped her
self." :
"You've got me again and I'll have
to get out tho best way I can. Yes,
the cause of failure lies with the ono
that has failed. It was a lack of
energy, a lack of Jedgmcnt a lack of
somethin'. A man must make circum
stances, but. sometimes circumstances
won't be made. Under the law all men
may be born free, but they ain't born
equal. Neither minds nor constitutions
are on a par with ono another in dif
ferent men. Man acknowledges this
nnd quietly knocks under, takln' hold
of the next best thing and doln' with
it what ho can. I'm talkin about
sensible man. But the woman of the
Miss Patsy stripe sho does her best,
and then tries to get even by doln' her
worst. Sho looks for happiness in the
misery of others. In a sorrowful coun
tenance sho linds the reward of her ef
forts. 'She holds man accountable for
the fact that she was born a female.
Tho dog that barks at the moon sees
somethin', but tho woman that rails
against nature sees nothin' but her
self. I know that some of tho women
folks would like to shoot mu for sayln'
it, but 1 do say that the mother of a
child is greater than the woman that
makes a speech five columns long und
has tho whole community talkin' about
how smart sho is."
"How about the father of a child?
Isn't ho greater than the man that
makes a speech?"
"He may be. About as no account
a man as 1 ever came across could
make a speech for the clouds, I tell
you. But when he got through he was
just a scashell that the musical wind
had been blowin' into. That was all.
He never had the joy of carin' for a
little human bein'. Ho was jest a
feller that folks could call great be
cause he could talk. We may not havo
a mission on this earth, but if we have
it is to obey the lovin' instincts of na'
ture. The man that hates and tho
woman that has no love in her heart
are both the enemies of nature. You
may say that old Miss Patsy would
have loved if the opportunity had been
given to her. She would have married,
that's true enough; but 1 don't believe
she, nor any of her ilk, ever had any
real love in her heart. I'm not standln'
hero talkin' up for man. Bless you,
he's hopeless. Ho a gone all the gaits
But tho best of us hnvu loved and
honored our women. We haven't called
them the enemies of man simply be
cause nature set a limit to our minds
and because fate, or whatever you
may call It, showed us our weakness
We ve played some cards and havo
drunk a good deal of liquor, but tho
best of us havo reformed and we hope
the Lord has forgiven us."
"Oh, of course," said the old lady,
"any man Is willing enough to ask the
Lord to forgive him when ho knows
that, it is nearly time for him to die.
During all tho time, night after night
while these dear little ones that he
thought so much of havo been growing
up, he has been off at elections and
other things; and when lie gets old
enough to quit then ho talks about tho
mission of nature and nil that sort of
stuff. If man doesn't want women to
go around juakln' speeches why
doesn't ho mur. y her and tako care of
her? If he I hit -;s that marriage is so
beautiful for a woman why doesn't he
prove that it i- beautiful for him?
Summing up irv book, as you Hummed
up yours, why doesn't a man learn
earlier how to behave himself?"
"Well, J reckon you've got
again," said the old man.
(Copyright, by Oplo Head.)
mo
Easter Horror in Russia.
"You must know," said the old
antiquary, "that in benighted Russia
the peasantry believe that by the
light of a candle made from the body
of a young girl killed at Master time
one Is Invisible. A fine thing for
thieves, that, eh a candle whereby,
invisible, the thief may steal a mil
lion or two of rubles very night?"
"And tho candles are made. Every
year or two, at about this season, the
Russian press recounts with horror
tho Easter murder of a good young
girl, from whoso llesh candles have
been molded."
Ho flourished the candle in his hand
Impressively. It was a clumsy, home
made kind of thing. The coarse wax,
very yellow, seemed to have been
poorly refined. There were in it, here
and there, lumps.
"Yes," he said, "this Is one of them,
I have papers authenticating Its hhv
tory byond porndventuro."
Characteristics of Cities.
Every great city has its character
istics. Americans' most lasting im
pression of London are the 'buses and
tho fog, Everyone who returns from
Paris talks of tho "llfo of tho boule
vards." Brussels has Its lace, Rome
its ruins and Moscow Its beggars.
WW JK
1 1
The Vital Point.
Judgo Gillette was ono of tho most
dignified of old-fashioned jurists. Ono
day ho was holding court at a county
sent in a rather out'Of-the-maln-rond
county, when a violent hubbub in the
hallway interrupted proceedings In tho
court-room. Arter quieting tho dis
turbance, tho sheriff returned to report
to tho julgo. "It was two men light
ing." explained tho olllclal. "Danny
Flannigan and Jako Jenkins, tough
characters about town. I havo put
them under arrest." And ho waited,
expecting that tho mnglstrato would
order both offenders to be brought in
to his presence and committed for con
tempt.
What was tho sheriff's nstonlshmont,
therefore when tho Judgo beckoned
him to 1hc desk, and bending down,
said in a confidential whisper:
"Which licked?" Illustrated Sun
day Magazine.
ITCHING HUMOR ON BOY
HIb Handc Were a Solid Mass, and
Disease Spread All Over Body
Cured In 4 Days By Cutlcurn.
"Ono day we noticed that our little
boy was all broken out with itching
sores. Wo first noticed It on his little
hands. Ills hands were not as bad.
then, nnd wo didn't think anything
serious would result. But the next day
wo heard of tho Cutlcurn Remedies
being so good for Itching sores. By
this time the disease had spread all
over his body, and his hands were
nothing but a solid mass of this itch
ing disease. I purchased a box of Cutl
curn, Soap and ono box of Cutlcurn
Ointment, and that night I took the
Cuticura Soap and lukewarm water
and wnBhed him well. Then I dried
him nnd took the Cuticura Ointment
and anointed him with it. I did this
every evening nnd In four nights ho
was entirely cured. Mrs. Frnnlc Don
ahue, 208 Fremont St., Kokomo, Ind.,
Sept. 1C, 1907."
Dinner Time.
Ho You know we can live on bread
and cheese and kisses.
She Yes, and when shall wo bo
married?
"At high noon."
"Well, you'd better get busy nnd
get a supply of bread, and cheese."
Yonkers Statesman.
Starch, liko everything olse, la ho
Ing constantly Improved, tho patent
Starches put on tho nuirkot 25 yours
ago are very dlfforont and' Inferior to
thoso of tho present day. In the lat
est discovery Dollunce Starch all in
jurious chemicals are omitted, whllo
tho addition of another ingredient, In
vented hy us, gives to the Starch a
strength und smoothness never ap
proached hy other brands.
Uusunlly.
"What Is a 'post-mortem,' pa?"
"What a woman puts at tho end of
a letter, my eon."
You ulvayn cl full value in Lewis'
Single Hinder straight fiu cigar. Your
dealer or Lewis' Factory, Peoria, 111.
Don't forget that a thing Isn't done
because you Intend to do it.
Mri. Wln!ow' Soothing Syrup.
Kor children Icctliluir, noftoiui ttiu kiwih, nxluccn la
aamumtiuii.nlliiyti luilu, curns wind colli). USuatxmic.
Suillclent unto the day are tho 24
hours thereof.
Let K3e Send Yu a Parage of
with your next order of groceries and I will guarantee
I Vv4 Atir Iron
...I XrJSfARCH
FOUR GIRLS
Restored to Health by Lydla 13.
Pinkham'H Vegetable Compound.
What Thmy Say
MIjLUllnnRoiw,53Q
East 81th Htroot, Now
York, wrltos: "Lydln
K. riukliam'rt Vcgot.
bio Compound over
came) irrogulnrltlos, pe
riodic sulTorin?, and
nervous headaches,
after ovorythlnp olse
had fnllud to lmip me,
iiiul I fool it a duty to
let others know of it."
KuUmrinoCrsUB,2355
Lnfayotto St., Donvor,
Col., writes: "Thanks
to LydlaE.l'inkhnm's
VoKutublo Compound I
nui well, ufternulTorlng
for months from ner
vous prostration."
Mlsu Mario Stolt
timn, of Laurol, la.,
writes: "I was inarun
downcoml 1 tioti and Buf
fered f romsupprcsslon,
indigestion, and poor
circulation. LydlaE.
Pinkham'H Vcgotablo
Compound iniulo mo
woll and strong."
Miss Ellen M. Olson,
ot 417 N. East St., Ke-
tit.tn Til iirii M T .
dhH.Plnkhtun'sVcgo
tablo Compound cured
mo ot liacknnho, Rid
nclin, and established
my periods, after the
best local doctors had
failed to holp mo."
FACTS FOR SICK WOMEN.
For thirty years Lydia E. Pink
ham's Vegetable Com)ound, made
from roots and herbs, has boon tho
standard remedy for fomalo ills,
and has positively cured thousands of
women who havo been troubled with
displacements, inflammation, ulcera
tion, libroid tumors, irregularities,
periodic pains, backacho, that bcar-mg-down
feeling-, flatulency, indigos
tion,dizziness,ornervous prostration.
Why don't you try it ?
Mrs. Phiklinin invites all sick
women to write her fur advice.
Sho has guided thousands to
health. Address, Lynn, Muss
PARKER'S
HAIR BALSAM
01aiuc) and bcsntlllc Ui hair.
1'ruiiHit.i a luxuriant grant!).
Never Faili to Honiara Uray
II nt r to ttu Youthful Color.
CutM ir.lp illwci. It lulr Hillrat.
tDc,ml el-Wat Drawl-
MVP. STOCK AND
ELECTROTYPES
MISCELLANEOUS
In urriit variety for mlo it t tlm InweM. prices by
I A. .". KKI.MMai.XKUSI'.tl't.UOI., .l W ,.tilamSt.,llr.(
A r J A It H 0 1 8 Rl ven tnittott
reilof. ltt AHIMI'I.KUUKK.
(t at ilriiKKlMti or liy irmlL
Nainiiio FUHK. Aildrem,
"ANAKE8I8"
Trluanu Utiltr., Kr.w Yoiul
DEFIANCE STARCH
111 ounces to
"llio punkace '
otliHr MnrclicH only li oitnc.ott Katun prlco aDd
"DEFIANCE" IS SUPERIOR QUALITY.
WIDOWS'11111'01 NEW LAW oWMneJ
PlSNS)M5Nfe wuuuiiiKtoa, t. a
'iX'Lo ! Thompson's Eye Water
V. N. U., LINCOLN, NO. 30, 1908.
lii Vf'A Tt OXA
Nebraska Military Academy
Lincoln, AclMnsku
' A llrsl -class military lioar.llim w'lni; l foi iiiiyn. Hplcn
1 did iMiildlnuutnl ki'oiiihI.h. I'li'iMicsIo.-nilloKiiiHiit
I Inihliicks. HiicclalilciiailiiK'tit l'orxiunu Imvmmclor l'i
jc.uib. Korliitouumiuii, allelic II. JJ.ljityuartf,Htit.
Cotner University
low. Hcnil for catalo ', etc
that you will be better satisfied
with it than with any starch you
have ever used.
I claim that it has no superior
for hot or cold starching, and
Sit Will
Not
Stick
to the
No cheap premiums aro given
with DBMANC'H STAKOII,
hut you i:t. oNK-'rimtD moiir
Kon voun monisy thitii of any
other brand.
JHSFIANtfR STARCH costs
10c for a lll-oz. pnekago, nnd I
will refund your money if It
bticks to the iron.
Truly yours,
UoNIChT .loim,
The Grocurymna
Jtaatt
PILES
I lot linn v, Noli.. Lincoln 'Hllncsl nilinro.Coi.i.wJ kh:
Liberal A'mn, .Mi-ilit Inc. Mi IKi'il.M! Illlilo, Milhlr. K.t
prcKslnn. Husl iin-.s. Normal, Att. Aoadcmv. Hom-
.ikt.ii4 .....ki Mil nl mi I li ir 7. .In mill rv tli. Kr iicrui.H vi.rv
C2
