Nebraska Newspapers

    Nemaha Advertiser
W. W- SANDERS, Publisher
Nemaha,
Nebraska
Ain't
"Say, i:tv,"
Toddles, "who
If Dip Truth
queried little
lire tho city
Tommy
UlltllOrl-
tics?"
"The city authorities, my son." re
plied Toddles, Sr., "are oIIIcIiiIh who
claim to Imve no nulliorliy when the
(lour public wants poinothiug doiH'."
IfiiHyiiipitlitle.
HI Vint--1 understand Miss Xetirlch
hnH disgraced her fiunlly by eloping
with their coachman.
Mlldrod--Woll, It servos them right.
They should huve employed a ehniif
four.
TdlllillU II tit AcCOIIIll.
.Scribbles Would you or mind re
peating your refusal of my ofi'er of
marriage?
MUs Chlilem Certainly not Hut
nvhy?
.Scribble--Oh, I want to take U
down In shorthand for use In my next
novel.
Nil on 1,1 Hi- ICIi-cti-ocilli-il.
"What do you think of that paint
ing?" asked .Mrs. N'oitrioh, olutlng to
. recent art purchase.
"I think," rejoined the critical friend,
"that hanging Is too good for It."
Kxitliilni'i!.
Jaggsby (- a. m.) 1 shay, otllshei,
I thlsh (hie) Ilhink streetV
Policeman Vos.
.faggBby Wish you'd (hie) d'reot mo
f 411. (Join f (hie) Mend lecturo
there.
Policeman What ! Attend a lecture
at this hour of tin; morning?
Jaggsby Yesh; t hash's when; I
(hie) live, an I'm married. Hhee?
Wlllliijf to liiMlvr.
Mrs. Wnbash -And did you lose your
tuishand since you came to Chicago?
Mrs. Weeds--No; jnior John died
ivhlle wc were In t'livolnnatl.
Mrs. Wnhnsh Was he reconciled to
to?
Mrs. Weeds Of course he was.
Didn't I Just tell you we wore In (.'In
ilnnatl at the time? Chicago News.
.tloih'Nt.
Mr. I tract's Miss Gushingtoii? Nof
Bho's not for me. She told me the oili
er day that her husband must he hand
wuie rather than wealthy.
Mis Asoum Well, you're not
tvoalthy, but then
Mr. Ilragg That's Just It. She lit
orally threw herself at my head, and
14 didn't like that sort of thing.--Catholic
Standard.
Lady (atnnch teetotaler) Oh. please,
would you mind fetching my little doc
Fido out of that saloon?
Obliging Hostler Why, certainly.
Which saloon was you In?
A !1- to Knt.
"Are you silll a vegetarian?"
"Nope. (Jot a better Job. Can afford
to buy meat now." Philadelphia
Ledger-
Accounted l-'or.
"It's strange," said the piano teach
er;1 "that you can't learn to run the
wales correctly."
"That Is probably one of the traits
V inherited from father," replied tho
toung lady pupil. "He made his money
liuthe grocery business, you know."
Coiiecrnliii; h l.iinil .Mini.
"You can't keep a good man down,"
auoted the morallzer.
"That's right," rejoined tho demoral
izer. "A good man Is like a wet sheet
In a washtuli you no sooner push him
down In one place than ho bulges up
la another."
Notlilnif to I,i)ii.
Motorist's Friend Oh, 1 say! Good
tiosf gracious! we'll he smashed up In
tt mlnuto!
Motorist All right, my dear fellow,
don't excite yourself. The firm I bought
thlb motor from have agreed to keep It
in repair for a year. Tit-Bits.
Comimrcd.
"I hope my vocal lessons dt not ills
iurb you, Mr. Singleton," miUl the young
ady IxMirtler.
"Oh, no," replied the old buehelor,
"Your vocal practice Isn't any more an
noying than tho practice of the alleged
caMeiH dentlut nextjJoor."
Tin- I ilcn t
i
WOMEN'S NEGLECT
SUFFERIHGTHESURE PENALTY
Honlth ThtiB Lost 1b Roatorod by Lydia
K. Plnkbum'a Votfotable Compound.
How rntiny women do you know who
aro perfectly well and HtrongV We
lienr everyday the same story over ntid
over again. " I do not feel well ; I am
so tired all the time "
Mora than likely you speak the same
words yourself, atid no doubt you feel
far from well. The cause may bo easily
traced to some derangement of the fe
male organs which manifests itself in
depression of spirits, reluctance to go
anywhere or do anything, backache,
bearing-down pains flatulency, nerv
ousness, sleeplessness, or oilier re
male weakness.
These symptoms are but warnings
that there is danger abend, and unless
heeded a life of suffering or a serious
operation is the inevitable result.
J he never-railing remedy rorall these
symptoms is Lydia K. IMukham's Veg
etable Compound.
Miss Kate McDonald or Woounridge,
N. J., writes :
Dear lira. Plnklinm-
" Hostored health bus meant so much to m
that I cannot help from lulling about it for
tin) siiko of other suffering women.
" For a long time I suffered untold ntjony
with a female trouble and irregularities,
which nmdo me a physical wreck, and no one
thought I would recover, but Lydia K. Pink
ham's Vegetable Compound Inn entirely
cured me, and mndo me well and strong, and
1 feel it my duty to t-oll other sutierlng women
what a splendid medicine it is."
For twentv-five years Mrs. Pinkbam.
dauglitor-iu-law of Hydia E. Plnklinm,
has under her direction, and since her
decease, been advising sick woman free
of charge. Her advice is free and
always helpful. Address, Lynn, Mass.
Every dog in Franco is taxed, and
uvery dog is registered.
IJlue eyes are rarely seen in people
of the colored races. Their eyes are
nearly always black, dark brown or
nrownisli yellow.
A Kansas Oity icomnn stnrted witl.
$(500 capital and in 12 months made
$4u.0n0.
. Clubs and sick friend? who need
Bitting up with, are two strenuous.,
problems of evil that must be sottle.l
by the women themselves. They
muat never expect help from rue
hti?hands who enjoy these liberties
Many a man will go to Heaven
on a ticket which roads- "Mrs.
John and huhsand. "
Tea adulteration has been advanced
to a science tiy Chinamen. They
scatter iron fillinge over the leaves
while they are green and as the
leaves curl up and dry they conceal
the lilling from sight.
The Bible does -not state that
'money is the. root of all evil." In
T Timothy, vi., 10. you may read :
4 For the love of money is the root
or all evil." This plainly declares
that it is the love of money from
which the evil comes, not the money
itself.
Persons predisposed toward erysip
elas should avoid wines, strong tea
and colTee, and highly epiced or sea
soned foods. The more laxative and
cooling the diet, the better.
WELL PEOPLE, TOO.
Vlw Doctor CSIven 1'ontuin to Con
vulcucriitn. A wise doctor tries to give nature It
host chance by saving the little strength
or the already exhausted patient, and
building up wasted energy with simple
but powerful nourishment.
"Five years ago." writes a doctor. "1
commenced to use Postum In my own
family Instead of coffee. 1 was so well
pleased with the results that I had twn
grocers place It In stock, guaranteeing
Us sale.
"I then commenced to recommend It
to my patients In place of coffee, as n
nutritious beverage. The consequence
Is, every store In town Is now selling It
as It has become a household necessity
In many homes.
"I'm sure I prescribe Postum as oil
en as any one remedy In the Materia
a I.. .11
Mediea In almost every case oi inui-
gestlon and nervousness I treat, und
with the best results.
"When 1 once Introduce It Into a fam
lly, It Is quite sure to remain. I shal'
continue to use It and prescribe It In
families where 1 practice,
"in convalescence from pneumonia
typhoid fever and other cases, 1 give It
as a liquid, easily absorbed diet. Yov
may use my letter as a reference anj
way you see fit." Nuiue given by Post
urn Co., Battle Creek, Mich. Ueud "Tlu
.'load to Wellvllle" In pkgs. "Tusre'i
a reason."
I Miss egjfewg
GOOD
A Southern unman ntys that iter
colored woman surprised her one day
with thi' announcement that she was
soon to he married again. The servant
explained that she had attended a fu
neral six weeks before anil that she
was to wed "the husband of the corpse."
She added that the bereaved widower
had noticed her at the funeral, "lie
said 1 was the life of the occasion."
Some years ago a faithful son of In
diana was enabled, by ron.'on of an In
heritance, to make a trip abroad. Up
on his return the Evansvllle people
were anxious to have his Impressions
of "furrlii parts." u wish with which
.'lie traveler obligingly compiled. "Tell
us all about Paris." some one finally
.suggested. "Paris," observed the Ev
'nm.ville niau, gravely, "Is certainly n
wonderful place, gents all things con
sidered, a wonderful place. Itnt," he
added, thoughtfully, "Evansvlllo for
pleasure."
A well-known Itoston writer tells,
with glee, of a neat sully on the part
of his nlno-year-old son, who Is a pu
pil at a private school at the Hub.
Aprojios of something or other, the
teacher had quoted the line, "In the
bright lexicon of youth, there's no such
word as 'fall.'" At this point the lad
mentioned arose ami ixdttely made
known his desire to otter an observa
tion with reference to the maxim. "It
occurs to me, sir," said he, "that If
such be the case, It. might be advisable
to bring the omission to the attention
of the publishers of the lexicon."
At midnight In Chicago once an Irish
IK)llcenian overhauled a sleep-walker
who was promenading a principal thor
oughfare clad only In his night robes.
.When the oflh er had awakened tho un
fortunate until, placed him under arrest,
.iiid was hustling hint off to the station,
the sleep-walker exclaimed with Indig
nation: "Surely you are not going to
look me up?" "Surest thing you
know!" airily responded the bluecoat.
"Why, man, I can't be held responsible
for the predicament you find me In! I
am a somnambulist." "Sure, it makes
no difference what church ye belong
to, sharply returned the olllcor; "ye
can't parade the streets of Chicago In
your nighty !"
Tlwro was a man whose wife had
an Aberdeen terrier of extreme feroci
ty. It bit the man a number of times
He expressed great hatred for it. FI
nally the terrier bit a large piece out
of the calf of the man's leg, and the
next day It disappeared. The man ad
vertised widely for the dog's return.
Ho offered a reward of $200 for It. IH
friends were amazed. "I thought," said
i friend to him, "that you hated that
log?" "I do," the man admitted
'Why, then, do you offer such a large
reward for Its return?" "To please
iiy wife." "Hut you're foolish," said
the other. "Such a large reward will
tie sure to bring It back." "No, no,"
said the man, with a smile. "You see,
It's dead."
IRON AGE GETTING OLD.
Over Three, lllllloii Ton of Ore 'ow
IIhciI Sapplim' tin- Supply.
It Is estimated that tho iron ore used'
to date In the world's Industries aggre
gates :5,:i00,00t,000 tons, and that the
consumption of raw Iron has multiplied
twenty-live times since the lirst ore was
extracted and utilized, says the New
York Tribune. In 1S00 the world con
sumed 2,000,000 while at the end of the
nineteenth century the figures were ft),
000,000 tons. President Hatfield of the
Iron and Steel Institute of England
said, In May, 100.", that the demands of
the century In cast iron, taking as a
basis the production of the hist thirty
years, would amount to about r4,000,
000,000 tons of ore. If this estimate Is
accepted, tho stock of Iron In the earth
would he exhausted before the begin
nlitg of the twenty-first century.
In view of this fact many predictions
have boon made regarding tho coniniod
Uy whMi will take the place of Iron
when the supply Is exhausted. When
this happens recourse must be had to
ores containing only a small part of
Iron, with the obvious result that Iron
would no longer be an article of ordl
nary use. One scientist has declared
that the age of iron will be superseded
by the use of aluminum. Another says
that the world will still have ijoeoss to
30,000,0(K),000 tons of Iron ore. of which
Germany will supply 2,200.000,000;
Spain fiOO.OOO.OOO ; Sweden, 1.000,000,
000; tho United States. 1,100,000,000,
and England 1,000,000,000.
These predictions, however, won hi 1ki
nullified hy the discovery of new Holds
and an Improved method of extraction.
Prof. A. 10. Toernebohm, president of
tho Geological bureau of Sweden, In a
report to the Swedish parliament says
that It may be predicted with certainty
i that the Iron layers In North America,
Germany and England will be exhaust
kd lu one or two centuries, tho richest
layers even sooner. The chief sufferer
will bo England, for tho coal Holds of
Durham and Northumberland will have
ceased to exist In from 2."0 to ,'iOO years
The coal stjnply in the United State?
and Germany will last longer, and It
has been ostiibll.-diod that tho lrpn ore
usually follows tho coal. P.cyond the
countries now sharing In the Iron Indus
try tho awakening of China, with Its
rich ore and coal beds, will have an ox
tensive lnlluence. However, should the
Inventive genius accomplish the ox true
Hon of Iron from the ore without the
consumption of much coal, condition
will be materially changed. Some spe
cialists draw attention to the coal field
In Russia, Algeria. China, Cuba, etc
Discoveries recently made tit Auerbaol
show a considerable layer of Iron ore
which Is said to extend more than a
mile In length and Is fifteen yards whU
and twenty yards deep. Tuts Is sahl tt
bo the most Important deposit so far
discovered In (Jerniuny.
5$444S2S3&344iSJ?
t
A ROYAL SLEEPER.
v&$'S'$S45S40SJS$S
King Edward ML, It there is any
truth In a story which the Now York
Tribune ropofits, should move to San
Francisco. It kowhs a pity to waste a
mind so far above earthly uncertainties-
In a steady-going country like old Eng
land. The story Iras to do with his
experience lu an earthquake at the
time when he was still Prince of Wales.
About ilfteen years ago thero wit
quite a severe earthquake along the
French and Italian ltlvleru, which
bowled over a number of lmdly con
structed buildings und created u good
deal of alarm. Every room In the hotel
where tho prince was staying groaned
and creaked and rattled. All the dogs
howled, and the steps of hurrying
guests were hoard down the corridors.
At the first suggestion of danger the
equerry or the prince, fttr sruuivy
. . r
Clarke, lMiundod out of bod and knock
ed at the luce's door.
"Wlmt'.s the matter?" asked ti
drowsy voice.
"There's an earthquake! C-ouie, sir!'
"Then why don't you send it a.wjty?"
was the royal answer.
"Won't you come outside, sir?"
"Outride? Certainly not. I'm In bed
Go away."
The equerrv followed the crowd Into
the iinon air. After an hour tlf' alarm
died away, and every one was return
ing to the hotel when another shock oc
curred. Ag.itn tho equerry's thought
How to the sleeping prince. The holt
to the throne of Groat Britain was lu
Ills snechil charge, lie returned to t!n
hotel and once more knocked on Ed
ward's door. No answer. Again he
knocked. SHU no response. A third
time, loud enough to rouse tho seven
sleepers. Still no sound from within.
Something was wrong. Had the
prince perished? The equerry Hung the
door open and dashed Into the ante
room. The curtains of the bedchamber
were drawn close. With frenzied hand
he seized them and drew them apart.
As he did so something, ho know not
what, struck htm full In the face. In
a .momentary fa! ntnoss ho leaned
utrnlnst the door. The next -moment a
voice fell on his car, grave and re
proachful :
"Look here, Clarke, I won't have tiny
more of this, and If you don't shut uj!
making that beastly row and let tne go
to sloop, I'll shy the other boot at you."
Not In .Mouriilnir.
A New York man was talking alwiut
Onle Head, the brilliant author and
jourunllst.
"Head, you know," ho said, "founded
the Arkansas Traveler. He edited that
excellent paper for ten years or more,
and made a great success of It.
"They .say that in the spring of J8Sri
a reporter for the Traveler died. He
was a fine young chap. A visitor to tho
olllce, the day after the funeral, found
tho editor and his staff talking about
his loss disconsolately.
"Mt has been a sad loss, friends,'
the visitor said. 'A sail loss indeed.'
lie sighed and looked about the room.
'And 1 am pleased to see,' ho wont on,
'that you commemorate tiho melancholy
event hy hanging up crape.'
"Oplo Head frowned.
"'Crape?' ho said. 'Where do you
see any crape?'
'"Over there,' said tho visitor, point
lug.
"'Crape bo durned.' said Heed. That
isn't crape. It's the olllce towel.'"
Exchange.
SclcetliiK ii (iootl Motto,
"Now." said tho prison visitor, "don't
you think It would bo helpful to yon
to take some good motto and try to live
up to It?"
"Maybe," replied the convict; "now
I'd like to select, for Instance, 'We are
here to-day and gone to-morrow.' "
Phlhullephlu Press.
A Mrlunclitily I tnprc.vtloii.
"Why did you give up that.
new
brand of prepared food?"
"I got to liking It," answered the,
habitual Invalid. "My physician ha
nliout convinced me that anything I
enjoy eating is necessarily Injurious to
m." Washington Star.
The nigttest railroad in tho world
is in Peru. It 1b the Oroya lino,
which runs from Callao, on tho coast,
across the Maritime and Central
Cordilleras of the Andes to Oroya, 3
distance of one hundred and thirty-
six miles. Tho road starts at ses
level and rises some five thousand
feet in the first forty-six miles ol
tho ascent The Gnlera Tunnel pene
trates a mountain at the highest
point reached by any railrcad, fifteen
thousand six hundred and forty-live
feet, or nearly three miles, abov
sea level.
Try changing the shoes worn in the
morning for another pair in the after
noon ; it will rest the feet wonder
fully.
If the head is uncomfortably hot
try deep breathing exercises to afford
relief. Headaches may sometimes
be relieved by it also.
k Your Dealer tor Allen' Foot-Kum
A powder to sliake Into your shoes. It rests
tbe feet. Cures Corns, Ilunlonx. Swollen.
Sore, Hot. Callous. Aelilni;. Sweating feet
and IiiRrowlnjc Nails. Allen's I-'ool-lOa.se
makes new or tls;lit shoes easy. Sold hy all
UriiKBlsts and Shoe Stores, L'5e. Sainplo
mailed KIIUI-J. Address Allen S. Olmsted.
Le Koy, N. Y.
About fifty years ago it was dilli-
cult to obtain a cup of tea in either
Germany or France. Nowadays livo
o'clock tea is an established institu
tions in both of these countries and
the refreshing beverage can bo ob
tained at all restaurants.
Ttie young lady who has the nicest
figure in Europe is Hertlia Krupp,
the heiress of the big gun man. Her
figure is about one hundred and iifty
million dollars.
Home made blackberry brandy pre
pared in this way will give satis
faction! Stew tho hlt-ckberries until
they are soft, then strain through a
flannel bag. To each quart of juice
allow a pound of sugar. Boil for a
few minutes, and skim carefully.
When cold mix with brandy in tho
proportion of one quart to four of
juice. Spices may be added, if
liked. When the blackberry brandy
is about to be used, a little moro
clear brandy may bo mixed with it.
A bucket shop is the name applied
to a place where stocics anu otner
securities, as well as grain and var
ious agricultural products, are bought
and sold, without any intention on
the part of the buyer or seller to
receive or deliver them. The patrons
of the bucket shop in reality merely
bet on the rise or fall of the market,
and the current prices of tho legiti
mate. Stock or Produce Exchange
aire recognized as the basis of their
'.ransactions.
A NERVOUS WRECK
Mrs. Groon Gained 26 Pounds and
Rocovorod Her Health by Taking
Dr. Williams' Pink Pills.
Goneral debility is a term that covers
a multitude of cases whoro thoro is no
acute disease, yet the patient continues
to lose strength and tho doctor's medi
cines have no apparent effect. This is
tho declino that leads to death if means
aro not found to check it. In a great
majority of cases Dr. Williams' Piuk
Pills will check it and restore health and
strength because thoy actually make now
blood and so send ronowed vitality to
every organ ami tissuo of tho body.
Mrs. S. A. Green, whoso address is
Box I'D, 11. F. D. No. -1, Franklin, Cla.,
says : "For three- and a half years I
suffered with weakness and nervous
ness, complicated with stomach trouble
At times I was confined to my bed fot
periods ranging from three weeks to two
mouths and was under tho physician s
cave most of the time for three years- 1
do not know the cause of my trouble but
I was prostrated with weakness and, al
though I took a great deal of medicine,
nothing scorned to give nio strongth. At
times my stomach hurt mo something
iearttu and my head ouoit troubles
1 was sleepless and what sloop I did got
did not refresh mo. ,
Whon I began taking Dr. Willi""'8
Pink Pills, I weighed but 104 pounds.
I knew 1 was so bad that a fow doses
would not euro mo and I had ptiltoace.
Soon the pills began to givo mo strength
my blood got in hotter oouditiou, l.00"'11
sleep well at night and help some with tho
housework. Now I weigh I30poundsand
think nothing of walking half 1110
Dr. Williams' Pink Pills linvo done won
ders for mo and tho neighbors all knowvr
this stntoinejit is true."
Dr. Williams' Pink Pills are sold by a'
druggists, or will bo sent by mail, no'
paid, on receipt of prhio.60itenr.Kpor box
fllx boxes 12.50, by tho Dr.WUliunisMod
loluo Co., Schenectady, N.Y.